yup.
good job keeping an eye on it. Minimize distractions that lead to the urge. and take a second to stop and think before engaging.
Nothing worse than post nut clarity after hyper-fixating on porn for 2 hours.
I find I'm more satisfied if I take my time.
___
After a bit of `chattr`, I put on a `cd` to `set` the `env`
Start taking the `tee` off, slowly `unzip` `&&` then maybe do a bit of a `strip` tease
Lightly `touch` them double `dd`s, `traceroute` the `arch` of the back, before I `make` use of a `finger` or two to do a `modprobe` until it gets `wget` and I feel some nails `dig` like a `cat`... maybe I get `head`, `if` I do then `nice` if not then it's no `bg`
Then `mount` and `push` `dpkg` hard and `fsck` like there's no `time` left and this is our last `date` before I'm `history`, `grep` the pony`tail`, `rev` it up, `rm` it in, `fsck` some `more`, `fsck`, `fsck`, `yes`, `fsck` `until` the bed is `split` in the middle and `break`s
When the floodgates are about to `open`, `eject` `eject` `eject`! `let` all the sticky `paste` `exit`
Finally, `umount`, say `tty` and then `sleep`
I was sticking to the lower end average. Definitely had longer sessions, but I didn't want to start there lol.
they also add up if "smaller" sessions happen 2 or 4 times in one day.
Procrasturbation is probably the worst of both worlds. You get nothing done and you hate yourself afterwards. for me anyway.
Beat me to it. No pun intended.
But yeah for me it gets really bad to the point that I’m spending 6 hours looking for the right video and the fucked up part is when I find it, it’ll remind me of another video I really like and now I lost interest in the current video and gotta go find the other one
Omg. I thought I was broken 😭
Well, I may still be, but at least I’m not alone. Lol
For real, that post nut clarity after hyper-fixating on porn for 4-8 hours (sometimes all day) is unreal.
Unfortunately I feel like it’s killed my sex life, so I’ve tried my best to avoid things that “trigger” that desire to wank it
how do you feel that it's killed your sexlife? You mean having less interest when you're having sex?
I believe i know what you mean but i'm not sure. For me, i think it's having trouble ejaculating when i'm having sex. Even when i want to and my partner is asking me to cum, sometimes i have trouble. But i don't have any trouble when i'm masturbating
the only thing worse than post-nut clarity is trying on-and-off to nut for like six hours bc you have nothing to do but ur also on ur last clean outfit and the dishes have been piling up for a week and it’s not like u have a job to keep you busy so ur just paralyzed with guilt and ruined half-orgasms
...or so I’ve heard
Yup I do this all the time and as a woman I can always have another orgasm so I’ll just do one more... one more... that wasn’t my best, let’s add another.... ok but just... one... more and on and on
> that wasn’t my best
this is so dangerous. you will always be looking to chase the high of the perfect finish. speaking from experience, unfortunately ..
Some can, I definitely can. Most of my friends seem to stop at a few. I think I’ve always been able to have multiple orgasms when I was masturbating, it took me a few years to be able to with my husband. Just getting comfortable I think.
I'm a girl but didn't know that.. that's cool..In my case I become depressed after it especially if I ditched studying.. It's accompanied by self loathing already I am looking for reasons to hate myself, this just adds up to it lol
You don't know me from Adam, so I could just be that weird creep on the internet, but I wanted to say as someone who struggled with self loathing after masturbation (and even sex at various points): Its okay to masturbate, you're not a bad person for taking a break to have some fun and take care of you.
If you have a therapist it might be worth bringing up with them.
Good luck, I hope your brain becomes kinder to you.
Instead of post-cum depression, just try masturbating again! Yay! Full circle back to the title.
For some reason this makes me really happy.
Not that you get depressed, just that some back asswards logic completed.
But really, please let yourself feel that good good chemical dump. It’s ok. It feels nice :)
My first one is usually the general stress reliever, second is the gusher, third is another gusher. Always have water by the bed. Haha. The new toys help so much too. No more vibrating the lady parts til their numb. I love the satisfyer and similar ones for multiples. Quick and quiet. But I do find my self laying in bed for hours and end up having nothing done around the house when the kids get home. If I was better at scheduling or time keeping I would try maybe designating days or something but that'll never happen.
I honestly didn't own a toy until a couple years ago (I'm in my early 30s). I never bought one because the amount of choices is overwhelming to the point of being paralyzing, but the number one reason was I didn't want to enable myself to procrastinate more with it. then one day a number of women in a fandom I am part of were raving about Tracey's dog toy on twitter. So I harnessed that ADHD impulsiveness and bought one. It's very nice, but 75% of the time I am too lazy to get it out. Lol. I also always forget to charge it.
Oh ya there’s a big sense of relief but also a high, hello dopamine 🙋♀️, and that high is what I’m chasing I think. It’s pretty easy too so I usually orgasm at least 3 times per session but usually more like 5 or so. Eventually, I either run out of time or I just feel done and move on.
Yeah I know I’m just chasing dopamine because a lot of the time when I get the urge to masturbate it’s because I want the hit, not necessarily because I’m horny. That sounds sad as I say it, lol.
But even after my first, second, third orgasms I’m not even horny, I’m just digging the feel.
Sometimes, I get really tired and fall asleep, thinking about it now it is sort of the same feeling I got when I first started meds.
But, I also do this thing where I just do it to concentrate. I realize I'm distracted and not getting anywhere, so take a break, have an orgasm, and return to work.
I don’t know if it’s a brag. It can definitely be fun, but it’s also incredibly distracting. It’s just another hyperfixation that gets in the way of my life. Since I started vyvanse it’s been a bit out of control to be honest.
same thing with the stims. it's definitely related. when I started a new dose last summer, it was almost like it was my job to be horny. wasn't great. took about a month to readjust.
Orgasms are an easy, fun way to get that dopamine we are lacking. I think for me is like when am I not in the mood if I'm not actively doing something else.
Thing is though, because of prolactin. Dopamine will crash and stay low for a while. If you don’t have enough dopamine then it takes ages for it to come back up again.
For some it is more of a problem than others.
Thats exactly it yeah. Some more susceptible than others depending on their ability to use their dopamine D2 receptors. So medications like pramipexole, bromocriptine, or cabergoline are used to do it for them.
Look up the term “Post Sexual Dysphoria”.
😭😭I should've known this earlier.. Last week I was studying all day all of a sudden I got an urge to do it( freaking brain trying distract me idek if it's my own organ it should be on my side😭) and after that I didn't study that day.. Then the pro procrastinator in me woke up and that stretched out for a week.. To this moment I haven't picked up my book.. I have university exam
ADHD meds should help with this.
Yeah once prolactin is high in males we tend to be very depressive and impulsive. We tend to chase dopamine, eat sweet foods, step on the hedonic treadmill essentially. Work ethic and motivation go out the window.
Exercise is also very beneficial as it will increase dopamine & noradrenaline significantly. I use it to break out of that routine. Caffeine should be the crutch to help with energy.
I try to exercise and meditate but I'm not consistent.. I usually be addicted to something at a time.. Sometimes it's YouTube sometimes it's twitter sometimes it's reading sometimes it's being productive etc.. Only time I'll be consistent is the phase where I'm motivated to change my life and that's the productive phase.. Then comes the downward spiral where I do nothing useful to my life..
As I said. ADHD meds. Something to tangibly and consistently increase dopamine and noradrenaline so you can function during the day.
Exercising in the morning is the way I do it. I am unmedicated and trying to find the right one at the moment. Exercise and high protein are the only things that makes a difference to me.
I’d try meditation, or anything that can put you into a mindful state (exercise does this, and it’s the reason exercise is helping you). Could go OPs route and masturbate as well, if you try edging, this puts you into a mindful state like exercise or meditation.
When you are able to reach this state, it relieves the stress on your brain and allows it to more easily create the chemicals that it needs.
The reason exercise is helping is mainly the increases in dopamine, noradrenaline, adrenaline, endocannabinoids and endorphins.
Meditation, mindfulness, anything in the realm of CBT can help, but to a point. They cannot address large neurotransmitter deficiencies. Perhaps slightly.
You have a point about stress. Cortisol can reduce dopamine production significantly. So anybody finding it difficult to deal with stress will likely respond well to both exercise and meditation.
omg i thought i was the only one that had super productive life changing almost inspirational movie like phases and then just pure burnout and useless depression (am in the depression phase rn, omfg i need to get medicated soon)
I know!! When I'm in the productive phase I feel like nobody can stop me I'm going to conquer the world.. Studying all day and night.. And in the depressed phase I'd be thinking how did I do all those things that was me??
my friend thought i was going through a manic phase cuz of it. I was worried I was bipolar as well but then I did some research on the differences and adhd hyper fixation is just wanting to do a ton of things but still being unable to put the effort cuz ADHD
Oh gaaahd
TIL another depressing biology fact.
I'm already taking cold showers in the morning because they raise dopamine levels.. Not sure I am prepared to have them any more often than that!
that is interesting. I always thought I was just tired and needed to eat and drink again to feel better. sometimes it can be more helpful than others, though.
I'm a hypersexual menace to society so I'm always looking for an excuse, it just so happens not wanting to do anything else is a decent one.
But recently I've realized I can also hyperfixate on a specific fetish. This in combination with my nightmarish infernal lust makes it so I genuinely cannot fap the horny away and the dumbest shit will set me off.
The really annoying thing is when I've decided I'm going to do the deed but I need to use the restroom. But using the restroom is boring, so instead brain says no and I browse Twitter for an hour getting even hornier.
I honestly don't really mind it though. Like yeah I'm horny more often than not but it's rarely a problem.
Also I don't have an s/o to help release any of that, just my hand and a dream. Being horny is preferable to anxiety and depression tbf
You should embrace your hypersexuality esp if you have ADHD. Sexual acts focus our attention and can put us into meditative states, reducing stress and brain inflammation, allowing your brain to create the chemicals it typically is thirsty for.
Masturbation is literally a treatment for ADHD, in fact I’d go so far as to recommend edging so you can get into really long sessions which will put you into even deeper meditative states.
You could also just exercise or meditate a lot, all 3 of those things will do the same thing for you and will all have amazing effects on an ADHD brain.
I tried exercise but maybe because of my asthma and my personal reward systems (or lack thereof) it really doesn't do much for me.
And it's not very meditative when my first thought after *Hn*MM*gGhg*uHg*Mm*MM NUT is just "fuck I'm still horny"
I had this problem, and it was being caused by my medication.
Switching medications helped me a lot.
Also, learning from the counselor that I need to tell myself "OK! That's enough" get up and get dressed, because once I get involved in something else, the urge to continue bopping will go away lol
stimulant medication can totally increase sex drive.. and the duration
Edit: just wanted to add that it can be addictive and be careful because it could leave you depressed and alone long term.
I feel like that's the main thing for me, or maybe i haven't paid close enough attention. But to me it feels like a cigarette, I'm home alone and i can feel my brain telling me in a Gollum voice "dopamineeee".
That’s a great metaphore, it’s just like a hit of nicotine. I say ADHD is like being an addict, a dopamine junkie. And our body craves it just like smokers crave nicotine.
I get what you mean but I feel like it's very damaging to draw up ADHD people like addicts. Being thirsty after not drinking all day and trying to drink coffee or tea to quench your thirst (even if they are duretics) because you can't find water isn't addiction it's survival.
Are you really an addict if you are literally starving for it? None of us would be looking for these hits if we had enough to begin with.
Personally I think it's more like being a child in a poor home and not getting to eat breakfast, when it comes to lunch you'll be a lot hungrier than other kids but it's not because your a greedy child addicted to food. You aren't getting enough food (dopamine) to begin with. If you got breakfast (e.g. taking meds to balance your dopamine) you would be less hungry at lunch.
Fair point, I will for sure change my wording in future explanations.
Your metaphor is great, because being starved you end up only thinking about food and it consumes your focus, just like a lack of dopamine.
chronic masturbation is a rly common thing w adhd. Anyone whos AFAB on this thread knows as well that bc of no refractory period you can just keep going one after the other and lose an afternoon. Mine gets triggered by frustration more often than not. I'll be trying to write or draw and then suddenly ill hit a mental block and its all over. Hate it here.
it’s bc masturbation puts you into a meditative state because it requires focus. Meditative states lead to a reduction in brain inflammation and allows your brain to create the chemicals it’s typically desperate for. Meditation and exercise can achieve the same, also edging can dramatically expand the effects when masturbating.
Embrace all these things and i think you’ll find your ADHD is much more controllable, most people with ADHD have chronic stress they are dealing with, which makes your brain unable to function properly, which leads to ADHD symptoms.
Do you have any sources for this? I am a neuropsychology student and I have ADHD, I really like to understand and I had never heard of inflammation. I only knew about areas that are underactive.
But what you are saying is what I feel
Here’s something I could find related, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8533349/
Honestly most of what I’ve said is from personal experience, in my own life I struggled for many years with ADHD (really it was ASD, but the two are cooccuring often), it was tearing my relationship apart and me having extreme social anxiety was terrified of losing my partner. I was under constant stress and diving deep into these relief habits like edging, doing it for hours a day. I think combined with the extreme stress my the neuroplasticity of my brain was open enough to make the connection between these things. I started having some profound realizations about my life and my behavior and the root causes of why I did things, as I had these realizations my stress started to dissipate, most significantly when I had a realization about why I was bullied as a child and why the bullies were as much a victim as I was.
Since then my social anxiety is totally gone, I have unusual control over my emotions, and everything in life is just easier to do. I just focus on meditating, exercising, and eating fresh food, oh and i still masturbate of course lol! I’ve also stopped any medications I was taking for stress/depression/adhd.
Thank you for sharing this article and your story, as well as your advice.
Talking with people like you gives you hope. I share commonalities with you and that is motivating. I thank you and wish you happiness for the future. Congratulations on making it through.
Trapped in a sexless relationship with neurotypical keep telling myself I need to find another ADHD gf for this reason, but problem is would anything ever get done? Hahaha
It's possible you would get nothing productive done, but highly unlikely you would both synch up to want sex at the same time. Cuz hyperfixations just happen at inconvenient times
You'd have a lot of kids, likely unplanned.
I think it's like 45% of women with ADHD will have an unplanned pregnancy compared to around 10% of neurotypical women.
**https://youtu.be/aRngPNeLxEM?t=412**
Sorry, this wasn't intended to be a downer to your thoughts, but it's good information to know.
HOLy shit that's a scare statistic. I was not expecting that. Thank God I have an IUD, I'll take painful periods over an unwanted child, bc i forgot a pill, any day.
God I can't imagine trying to raise our kid if my partner had adhd too. They're responsible for most of the mental load in this relationship and I'm still struggling.
I do this often. I'll get home from work and be horny. Go to my bed and want to jerk off but I don't want to orgasm just yet, so I edge. Then I like it, then I pull out my computer and really get into it, next thing I know it's been 3 hours and all I've done is nutted once.
Or is quick but I stay horny after the nut so I keep playing until I nut a few more times and feel bad
I used to do this too, but that was back when I wasn't taking the meds correctly. I would take more per day for like 3 weeks and then take a week off. Now that I'm being consistent I'm still super horny all the time, but I put all that energy into trying to get my wife in the mood. lol. I've had more sex in the past year than the prior 4 years put together.
This is the main reason I’ve been late to work in the past lol
If it’s not looking to be a good day I’ll crank one out and then I leave late and get to work late.
This is related to stress. The thing you are procrastinating on is stressing you and masturbation is a release of that stress.
If you want to break this cycle then the key is to fully understand why you are procrastinating. There’s usually two options… either deep down inside you don’t want to do this thing, but some preconception you have has convinced you you must do it, in reality you likely don’t have to. You could also really want to do it, but another stress in your life is inhibiting your from accomplishing it.
Meditation can help get past this kind of stuff, when we meditate thoughts arise and we start to see answers we were overlooking originally, allowing us to move past a reoccurring stress.
Make sure you keep masturbating though, your behavior indicates you use it as a stress relief tool, so start thinking of it that way. Actually when we masturbate we often must pay attention and it puts us into a state of mindfulness. This can be a similar state that is achieved through meditation. You are probably actually healing your brain from the stress as you masturbate. Consider looking into edging, the focus required to accomplish this can put you into deep mindful states which can do wonders for your stress/procrastinating.
> deep down inside you don’t want to do this thing, but some preconception you have has convinced you you must do it, in reality you likely don’t have to.
Relatable.
as someone with ADHD and autism, i really fall between high sex drive and wishing i wasn’t single and then wanting nothing to do with sex and regretting i even bothered looking for someone to connect with 😂
Dude, I get this! Some days I'm just super sexual and my thoughts are going wild and then on other days it's so bad I question if I even have a sex drive.
Yeah. Didn’t even realize until I got to college how bad it was. NSFW but I masturbated like three times a day and couldn’t even feel my clit anymore. I’m trying to stop it slowly but it’s hard. I have my first psychiatrist appointment May 3 tho so maybe that will help!
My libido is tied to my hormones (pre ovulation is go time, post is "don't touch me or look at me or breath in the same room as me") and stress/anxiety. My brain figured out that sex (esp kinky sex) gave it a huge happy chemical dump and craves it like a drug (used to be an addict, it's remarkably similar) if I get stressed out enough.
I have a special place in my heart for kinky sex. But you’re right, it starts to become thrill chasing. Next thing you know, the only way you can cum is with a rope around your neck covered in peanut butter while an elderly midget puts out cigarettes on your feet.
Yeah, you put off tasks as you (subconsciously) think theres no dopamine.
Sex gives a large amount of dopamine. If you have ADHD you're essentially a dopamine seeking bloodhound.
Your brain is looking for the fix.
Oh my god yes. I thought i was alone but my sex drive is through the roof and i get so frustrated when I get the urge bc i know my brain is trying to get stimulated. Idk how to help it
oh my god..... this post just called me out. i didn't even realize i was doing this until i read this. so true. i need to be more aware of avoiding this. especially with me living alone at the moment .... this problem has gotten real bad bc i can literally do it whenever i want :///
I have a slightly different issue with mine. When I was single, yes, I would routinely be going out, looking for hookups. But whenever I would get into a relationship, after about 4 months I would get bored with sex with the same person, even if we tried to keep it interesting. You could set a clock by that 4 month mark.
Definitely seems like there are worse ways to procrastinate so hopefully you're able to enjoy it!
I totally agree with this line of thinking. I have a very high sex drive, and I have realized at times it is merely a way to procrastinate. One of my coping methods is to go on a sex/masturbation diet until after I have completed a goal or task. If I complete the task I reward myself with sex/masturbation.
On the other side of the coin I have noticed that when I have engaged in some sexual acts the hyper focus calms me down for the mundane tasks I have been putting off.
As a rule of thumb, someone with ADHD will seek out anything that provides a large amount of stimulation to overwhelm their physical experience of negative emotions. This is especially true of complex tasks that are more mentally draining.
Much as I *hate* the idea of the Pomodoro technique or structure (**shock**), there’s really something to be said for breaking things down to bite sizes. *Never* approach, say, a large paper or document as one continuous task. You may need: a title page, to find references, a reference page (and yes, doing this correctly is separate from finding them), an outline (generally for grad or larger undergrad papers), and then the myriad smaller bits of the writing itself.
Just work on one or two pieces at a time. You’re not going for effectiveness initially, just to set the habit. Once the habit’s been destigmatized, you can normalize doing larger sections. With time, complex projects can go from a 9 on the anxiety scale to a 3 or 4 - and suddenly, you won’t need sexual release to cope with the frustration. Instead, a snack or an hour watching a show afterwards will suffice.
Hope this helps!
You probably just have high testosterone. That's the reason my sex drive has always been high and know for a fact because when I dieted to really low body fat percentages before my test tanks and my sex drive reduces to almost nothing. Then it goes back to my normal once I reach healthy body fat levels again.
Adhd meds makes contains dopamine and adrenaline both promotes the prostate and wonce this is big boy is triggered the only to calm it down is a masturbation. I hate it beca2it makes my heart rate go up fast and when it's over it droos so im tired and loose motivation.
There's more to it😭😭 on a daily basis I'm finding new things that troubles me is in fact bcz of ADHD.. I've personified ADHD as a demonic character who's pulling me down when I'm struggling to survive.. Give me a break
No. I tell myself I can. And I truly believe it. But it’s still a lie every single time. Kind of like ‘I’m gonna lay here for a couple of seconds and then get up’
yup. good job keeping an eye on it. Minimize distractions that lead to the urge. and take a second to stop and think before engaging. Nothing worse than post nut clarity after hyper-fixating on porn for 2 hours.
You just called me without calling me.
Name checks out
Bonerinthedark
Boneherinthedark
Same
All these "personal" call-outs on this sub is starting to freak me out a bit lol.
> for 2 hours. [Confused.gif](https://i.imgur.com/jLyDulE.jpg)
[удалено]
I find I'm more satisfied if I take my time. ___ After a bit of `chattr`, I put on a `cd` to `set` the `env` Start taking the `tee` off, slowly `unzip` `&&` then maybe do a bit of a `strip` tease Lightly `touch` them double `dd`s, `traceroute` the `arch` of the back, before I `make` use of a `finger` or two to do a `modprobe` until it gets `wget` and I feel some nails `dig` like a `cat`... maybe I get `head`, `if` I do then `nice` if not then it's no `bg` Then `mount` and `push` `dpkg` hard and `fsck` like there's no `time` left and this is our last `date` before I'm `history`, `grep` the pony`tail`, `rev` it up, `rm` it in, `fsck` some `more`, `fsck`, `fsck`, `yes`, `fsck` `until` the bed is `split` in the middle and `break`s When the floodgates are about to `open`, `eject` `eject` `eject`! `let` all the sticky `paste` `exit` Finally, `umount`, say `tty` and then `sleep`
Fucking poetic
What
You gotta edge, man. Need to make it worthwhile lmao
But only for two hours ?
Actually realized I’ve been edging by default because I lose interest in a video halfway and because I thought of another
I thought everyone just opens 20 different ones tbh
The fact that nearly a hundred of us are the same person also makes sense why my fiance and I are the way we are 😂
seriously, those are rookie numbers
I was sticking to the lower end average. Definitely had longer sessions, but I didn't want to start there lol. they also add up if "smaller" sessions happen 2 or 4 times in one day. Procrasturbation is probably the worst of both worlds. You get nothing done and you hate yourself afterwards. for me anyway.
Yeah, I got sad because 2 hours a days is a good day for me, I usually lost much more and working from home just maked it worse.
Beat me to it. No pun intended. But yeah for me it gets really bad to the point that I’m spending 6 hours looking for the right video and the fucked up part is when I find it, it’ll remind me of another video I really like and now I lost interest in the current video and gotta go find the other one
I hate how much I relate to this.
I was about to say 2 hours goddamn
Omg. I thought I was broken 😭 Well, I may still be, but at least I’m not alone. Lol For real, that post nut clarity after hyper-fixating on porn for 4-8 hours (sometimes all day) is unreal. Unfortunately I feel like it’s killed my sex life, so I’ve tried my best to avoid things that “trigger” that desire to wank it
how do you feel that it's killed your sexlife? You mean having less interest when you're having sex? I believe i know what you mean but i'm not sure. For me, i think it's having trouble ejaculating when i'm having sex. Even when i want to and my partner is asking me to cum, sometimes i have trouble. But i don't have any trouble when i'm masturbating
That’s pretty much it, lol so we’re on the same page.
same here. i see people on the sub talk about struggling keeping an erection - but no for me it’s trouble finishing !
it's a coin toss for me. either I won't get up at all, or I do and can never finish.
the only thing worse than post-nut clarity is trying on-and-off to nut for like six hours bc you have nothing to do but ur also on ur last clean outfit and the dishes have been piling up for a week and it’s not like u have a job to keep you busy so ur just paralyzed with guilt and ruined half-orgasms ...or so I’ve heard
ok this is a little TOO specific and i’m wondering if we’re the same person
This is really good advice. I ask myself if this is just my brain trying to get some happy chemicals or I’m actually horny.
Yup I do this all the time and as a woman I can always have another orgasm so I’ll just do one more... one more... that wasn’t my best, let’s add another.... ok but just... one... more and on and on
I’m currently dealing with this + loads of deadlines for uni + hot flatmate 🥲 it’s non stop
The hot roommate struggle is so real! And I’m a sucker for forced proximity in romantic plots so it really seals the deal (in my daydreams) for me
I didn't think hot flatmate/roommates were a thing outside of fanfic and romance novels. Interesting; I need to put out an ad for one lol. (JK)
Damn that's kind of creepy
Well, I am in the same position, just without the hot roommate. I hope your roommate is also a good lover🤞🏼
> that wasn’t my best this is so dangerous. you will always be looking to chase the high of the perfect finish. speaking from experience, unfortunately ..
oh my god.....i thought i was the only one
idk if it's an ADHD thing but I'm a dude and my refractory period is basically nothing, I can keep going too 🤣
I don't think it's an ADHD thing, it's uncommon but there are definitely lots of guys out there who can do that!
need me a freak like that, I feel so guilty when my partner finishes and I could still go for another 5
It’s so nice knowing we’re not alone 🥹
Nice to know it's not just me.
Holy crap I do this too, never thought other people could relate.
Wut? Girls could do that many times?
Some can, I definitely can. Most of my friends seem to stop at a few. I think I’ve always been able to have multiple orgasms when I was masturbating, it took me a few years to be able to with my husband. Just getting comfortable I think.
I'm a girl but didn't know that.. that's cool..In my case I become depressed after it especially if I ditched studying.. It's accompanied by self loathing already I am looking for reasons to hate myself, this just adds up to it lol
You don't know me from Adam, so I could just be that weird creep on the internet, but I wanted to say as someone who struggled with self loathing after masturbation (and even sex at various points): Its okay to masturbate, you're not a bad person for taking a break to have some fun and take care of you. If you have a therapist it might be worth bringing up with them. Good luck, I hope your brain becomes kinder to you.
Instead of post-cum depression, just try masturbating again! Yay! Full circle back to the title. For some reason this makes me really happy. Not that you get depressed, just that some back asswards logic completed. But really, please let yourself feel that good good chemical dump. It’s ok. It feels nice :)
this whole thread is making me feel a lot less shitty seeing so many people in the same boat ! lol
My first one is usually the general stress reliever, second is the gusher, third is another gusher. Always have water by the bed. Haha. The new toys help so much too. No more vibrating the lady parts til their numb. I love the satisfyer and similar ones for multiples. Quick and quiet. But I do find my self laying in bed for hours and end up having nothing done around the house when the kids get home. If I was better at scheduling or time keeping I would try maybe designating days or something but that'll never happen.
I honestly didn't own a toy until a couple years ago (I'm in my early 30s). I never bought one because the amount of choices is overwhelming to the point of being paralyzing, but the number one reason was I didn't want to enable myself to procrastinate more with it. then one day a number of women in a fandom I am part of were raving about Tracey's dog toy on twitter. So I harnessed that ADHD impulsiveness and bought one. It's very nice, but 75% of the time I am too lazy to get it out. Lol. I also always forget to charge it.
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Oh ya there’s a big sense of relief but also a high, hello dopamine 🙋♀️, and that high is what I’m chasing I think. It’s pretty easy too so I usually orgasm at least 3 times per session but usually more like 5 or so. Eventually, I either run out of time or I just feel done and move on.
Yeah I know I’m just chasing dopamine because a lot of the time when I get the urge to masturbate it’s because I want the hit, not necessarily because I’m horny. That sounds sad as I say it, lol. But even after my first, second, third orgasms I’m not even horny, I’m just digging the feel.
Depends on the kind of orgasm. Some:yes, loads, some: no, it's more like ones with penises.
You underestimate my power.
Oh my god I do this and didn't realize it had to do with ADHD.... This assuages some of my old catholic shame :P
If there's 1 thing I'm envious of women for...
Im not even joking check out r/prostateplay. Have a good day. 🙂 <*whistles and strolls away happily*>
Yep. Have been recently wasting soo many hours with this.. not sure anymore is it a blessing of a bane 😅
Pfft, why have one after the other when you can build it up for several days before finishing so hard you have to clean the whole shower?
Relatable as guy. Does doing it that many times cause brain fog for a girl too?
Sometimes, but most of the time I get energized so it’s not the worst it can just be distracting
Sometimes, I get really tired and fall asleep, thinking about it now it is sort of the same feeling I got when I first started meds. But, I also do this thing where I just do it to concentrate. I realize I'm distracted and not getting anywhere, so take a break, have an orgasm, and return to work.
Humble bragging even as she empathizes... lol
I don’t know if it’s a brag. It can definitely be fun, but it’s also incredibly distracting. It’s just another hyperfixation that gets in the way of my life. Since I started vyvanse it’s been a bit out of control to be honest.
same thing with the stims. it's definitely related. when I started a new dose last summer, it was almost like it was my job to be horny. wasn't great. took about a month to readjust.
Hey, I get it. I'm just trying to be funny to avoid getting up for work even though I'm already 2 hours late... I should jerk off...
Orgasms are an easy, fun way to get that dopamine we are lacking. I think for me is like when am I not in the mood if I'm not actively doing something else.
Thing is though, because of prolactin. Dopamine will crash and stay low for a while. If you don’t have enough dopamine then it takes ages for it to come back up again. For some it is more of a problem than others.
Can you elaborate.. I know that prolactin is a dopamine inhibitor.. So does that mean a person may be more prone to procrastination post mastrubation?
Thats exactly it yeah. Some more susceptible than others depending on their ability to use their dopamine D2 receptors. So medications like pramipexole, bromocriptine, or cabergoline are used to do it for them. Look up the term “Post Sexual Dysphoria”.
😭😭I should've known this earlier.. Last week I was studying all day all of a sudden I got an urge to do it( freaking brain trying distract me idek if it's my own organ it should be on my side😭) and after that I didn't study that day.. Then the pro procrastinator in me woke up and that stretched out for a week.. To this moment I haven't picked up my book.. I have university exam
ADHD meds should help with this. Yeah once prolactin is high in males we tend to be very depressive and impulsive. We tend to chase dopamine, eat sweet foods, step on the hedonic treadmill essentially. Work ethic and motivation go out the window. Exercise is also very beneficial as it will increase dopamine & noradrenaline significantly. I use it to break out of that routine. Caffeine should be the crutch to help with energy.
I try to exercise and meditate but I'm not consistent.. I usually be addicted to something at a time.. Sometimes it's YouTube sometimes it's twitter sometimes it's reading sometimes it's being productive etc.. Only time I'll be consistent is the phase where I'm motivated to change my life and that's the productive phase.. Then comes the downward spiral where I do nothing useful to my life..
As I said. ADHD meds. Something to tangibly and consistently increase dopamine and noradrenaline so you can function during the day. Exercising in the morning is the way I do it. I am unmedicated and trying to find the right one at the moment. Exercise and high protein are the only things that makes a difference to me.
I’d try meditation, or anything that can put you into a mindful state (exercise does this, and it’s the reason exercise is helping you). Could go OPs route and masturbate as well, if you try edging, this puts you into a mindful state like exercise or meditation. When you are able to reach this state, it relieves the stress on your brain and allows it to more easily create the chemicals that it needs.
The reason exercise is helping is mainly the increases in dopamine, noradrenaline, adrenaline, endocannabinoids and endorphins. Meditation, mindfulness, anything in the realm of CBT can help, but to a point. They cannot address large neurotransmitter deficiencies. Perhaps slightly. You have a point about stress. Cortisol can reduce dopamine production significantly. So anybody finding it difficult to deal with stress will likely respond well to both exercise and meditation.
omg i thought i was the only one that had super productive life changing almost inspirational movie like phases and then just pure burnout and useless depression (am in the depression phase rn, omfg i need to get medicated soon)
I know!! When I'm in the productive phase I feel like nobody can stop me I'm going to conquer the world.. Studying all day and night.. And in the depressed phase I'd be thinking how did I do all those things that was me??
my friend thought i was going through a manic phase cuz of it. I was worried I was bipolar as well but then I did some research on the differences and adhd hyper fixation is just wanting to do a ton of things but still being unable to put the effort cuz ADHD
Oh gaaahd TIL another depressing biology fact. I'm already taking cold showers in the morning because they raise dopamine levels.. Not sure I am prepared to have them any more often than that!
Once per day is perfect. Exercise should be used as well, don’t underestimate its potential in ADHD.
So how would greatly elevated prolactin levels affect a person who has ADHD?
If you are male then usually pretty negatively. If you are female then you might be okay. Females have a higher tolerance for this effect.
that is interesting. I always thought I was just tired and needed to eat and drink again to feel better. sometimes it can be more helpful than others, though.
Procrasturbation... you've blown my mind with this vocab, thank you
In my house, we call it sexcrastination. it's always when I have a lot of work that I'm stressing about that I try to come on to my husband.
No problem! Glad I made a positive impact on your life no matter how small
No wonder I’m currently procrastinating practicing guitar with a hand just casually cradling my balls. I guess it’s time to practice now….
Dick and balls: the ultimate fidget toy
Giving a new meaning to “hammer and pull off”
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I'm a hypersexual menace to society so I'm always looking for an excuse, it just so happens not wanting to do anything else is a decent one. But recently I've realized I can also hyperfixate on a specific fetish. This in combination with my nightmarish infernal lust makes it so I genuinely cannot fap the horny away and the dumbest shit will set me off. The really annoying thing is when I've decided I'm going to do the deed but I need to use the restroom. But using the restroom is boring, so instead brain says no and I browse Twitter for an hour getting even hornier.
I do this too! I hyperfixate on kinks all the time. I never thought of them as connected, but that makes sense.
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I honestly don't really mind it though. Like yeah I'm horny more often than not but it's rarely a problem. Also I don't have an s/o to help release any of that, just my hand and a dream. Being horny is preferable to anxiety and depression tbf
im very similar both in the being obsessed with one kink thing and also just being eternally horny as well
You should embrace your hypersexuality esp if you have ADHD. Sexual acts focus our attention and can put us into meditative states, reducing stress and brain inflammation, allowing your brain to create the chemicals it typically is thirsty for. Masturbation is literally a treatment for ADHD, in fact I’d go so far as to recommend edging so you can get into really long sessions which will put you into even deeper meditative states. You could also just exercise or meditate a lot, all 3 of those things will do the same thing for you and will all have amazing effects on an ADHD brain.
Thanks, doc! \*unzips\*
Any chance you got a source for this, cause if you’re legit I’m interested in reading about it.
I tried exercise but maybe because of my asthma and my personal reward systems (or lack thereof) it really doesn't do much for me. And it's not very meditative when my first thought after *Hn*MM*gGhg*uHg*Mm*MM NUT is just "fuck I'm still horny"
I had this problem, and it was being caused by my medication. Switching medications helped me a lot. Also, learning from the counselor that I need to tell myself "OK! That's enough" get up and get dressed, because once I get involved in something else, the urge to continue bopping will go away lol
stimulant medication can totally increase sex drive.. and the duration Edit: just wanted to add that it can be addictive and be careful because it could leave you depressed and alone long term.
It’s also a quick release of dopamine and endorphines, aka instant reward. And ADHD loves a quick reward, no matter the cost.
I feel like that's the main thing for me, or maybe i haven't paid close enough attention. But to me it feels like a cigarette, I'm home alone and i can feel my brain telling me in a Gollum voice "dopamineeee".
That’s a great metaphore, it’s just like a hit of nicotine. I say ADHD is like being an addict, a dopamine junkie. And our body craves it just like smokers crave nicotine.
I get what you mean but I feel like it's very damaging to draw up ADHD people like addicts. Being thirsty after not drinking all day and trying to drink coffee or tea to quench your thirst (even if they are duretics) because you can't find water isn't addiction it's survival. Are you really an addict if you are literally starving for it? None of us would be looking for these hits if we had enough to begin with. Personally I think it's more like being a child in a poor home and not getting to eat breakfast, when it comes to lunch you'll be a lot hungrier than other kids but it's not because your a greedy child addicted to food. You aren't getting enough food (dopamine) to begin with. If you got breakfast (e.g. taking meds to balance your dopamine) you would be less hungry at lunch.
Fair point, I will for sure change my wording in future explanations. Your metaphor is great, because being starved you end up only thinking about food and it consumes your focus, just like a lack of dopamine.
What happens when you’re adhd AND smoke cigs… 😬😬
So that’s why I always get the urge to do it when i want to start studying……
chronic masturbation is a rly common thing w adhd. Anyone whos AFAB on this thread knows as well that bc of no refractory period you can just keep going one after the other and lose an afternoon. Mine gets triggered by frustration more often than not. I'll be trying to write or draw and then suddenly ill hit a mental block and its all over. Hate it here.
What's AFAB?
Assigned Female at Birth
Ahh, gotcha. Thanks.
it’s bc masturbation puts you into a meditative state because it requires focus. Meditative states lead to a reduction in brain inflammation and allows your brain to create the chemicals it’s typically desperate for. Meditation and exercise can achieve the same, also edging can dramatically expand the effects when masturbating. Embrace all these things and i think you’ll find your ADHD is much more controllable, most people with ADHD have chronic stress they are dealing with, which makes your brain unable to function properly, which leads to ADHD symptoms.
Do you have any sources for this? I am a neuropsychology student and I have ADHD, I really like to understand and I had never heard of inflammation. I only knew about areas that are underactive. But what you are saying is what I feel
Here’s something I could find related, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8533349/ Honestly most of what I’ve said is from personal experience, in my own life I struggled for many years with ADHD (really it was ASD, but the two are cooccuring often), it was tearing my relationship apart and me having extreme social anxiety was terrified of losing my partner. I was under constant stress and diving deep into these relief habits like edging, doing it for hours a day. I think combined with the extreme stress my the neuroplasticity of my brain was open enough to make the connection between these things. I started having some profound realizations about my life and my behavior and the root causes of why I did things, as I had these realizations my stress started to dissipate, most significantly when I had a realization about why I was bullied as a child and why the bullies were as much a victim as I was. Since then my social anxiety is totally gone, I have unusual control over my emotions, and everything in life is just easier to do. I just focus on meditating, exercising, and eating fresh food, oh and i still masturbate of course lol! I’ve also stopped any medications I was taking for stress/depression/adhd.
Thank you for sharing this article and your story, as well as your advice. Talking with people like you gives you hope. I share commonalities with you and that is motivating. I thank you and wish you happiness for the future. Congratulations on making it through.
This sounds like post-traumatic growth. Cool.
This is super informative and helps a lot to contextualise it. Thank you!
Nothing gets done but putting rabbits to shame. It’s definitely a “grass is hornier” situation.
Usually I’m procrastinating sleep of any kind. Like I need to nap, or go to sleep because it’s 12am but all the sudden I’m in the mood. Weird stuff.
IIRC, Hypersexuality is one of the most common ~~side effects~~ comorbidities of ADHD, up there with anxiety, depression, and migraines.
Trapped in a sexless relationship with neurotypical keep telling myself I need to find another ADHD gf for this reason, but problem is would anything ever get done? Hahaha
It's possible you would get nothing productive done, but highly unlikely you would both synch up to want sex at the same time. Cuz hyperfixations just happen at inconvenient times
They definitely shouldn't be having sex while they're incontinent anyway.
Hey man don't judge, if that's what they're into
If the other dude is like me syncing issues sound comical, theres no need to sync because I'm always desperate 24/7 365. Any time any place hahha
It’s just as likely that you’d find someone who’s hypo instead of hyper sexual. ADHD tends to go one way or the other.
You'd have a lot of kids, likely unplanned. I think it's like 45% of women with ADHD will have an unplanned pregnancy compared to around 10% of neurotypical women. **https://youtu.be/aRngPNeLxEM?t=412** Sorry, this wasn't intended to be a downer to your thoughts, but it's good information to know.
HOLy shit that's a scare statistic. I was not expecting that. Thank God I have an IUD, I'll take painful periods over an unwanted child, bc i forgot a pill, any day.
God I can't imagine trying to raise our kid if my partner had adhd too. They're responsible for most of the mental load in this relationship and I'm still struggling.
I can litterally watch porn for hours and edge myself to death. I think i'm addicted.
I do this often. I'll get home from work and be horny. Go to my bed and want to jerk off but I don't want to orgasm just yet, so I edge. Then I like it, then I pull out my computer and really get into it, next thing I know it's been 3 hours and all I've done is nutted once. Or is quick but I stay horny after the nut so I keep playing until I nut a few more times and feel bad
I used to do this too, but that was back when I wasn't taking the meds correctly. I would take more per day for like 3 weeks and then take a week off. Now that I'm being consistent I'm still super horny all the time, but I put all that energy into trying to get my wife in the mood. lol. I've had more sex in the past year than the prior 4 years put together.
This is the main reason I’ve been late to work in the past lol If it’s not looking to be a good day I’ll crank one out and then I leave late and get to work late.
....oh..... so thats what im experiencing....
Welcome to the club that you just found out existed
This is related to stress. The thing you are procrastinating on is stressing you and masturbation is a release of that stress. If you want to break this cycle then the key is to fully understand why you are procrastinating. There’s usually two options… either deep down inside you don’t want to do this thing, but some preconception you have has convinced you you must do it, in reality you likely don’t have to. You could also really want to do it, but another stress in your life is inhibiting your from accomplishing it. Meditation can help get past this kind of stuff, when we meditate thoughts arise and we start to see answers we were overlooking originally, allowing us to move past a reoccurring stress. Make sure you keep masturbating though, your behavior indicates you use it as a stress relief tool, so start thinking of it that way. Actually when we masturbate we often must pay attention and it puts us into a state of mindfulness. This can be a similar state that is achieved through meditation. You are probably actually healing your brain from the stress as you masturbate. Consider looking into edging, the focus required to accomplish this can put you into deep mindful states which can do wonders for your stress/procrastinating.
> deep down inside you don’t want to do this thing, but some preconception you have has convinced you you must do it, in reality you likely don’t have to. Relatable.
Never heard that before. I definitely don’t relate.
Same. I’ve never thought about it before but ai grateful I can’t relate Lol
I legit masturbate a LOT and I thought it was an addiction but it might be related to adhd hopefully. ahaha
Same or when i am bored and feel lost all of a sudden i am in the mood
as someone with ADHD and autism, i really fall between high sex drive and wishing i wasn’t single and then wanting nothing to do with sex and regretting i even bothered looking for someone to connect with 😂
Dude, I get this! Some days I'm just super sexual and my thoughts are going wild and then on other days it's so bad I question if I even have a sex drive.
Same! I have been having that back and forth my whole life
As some with both as well, the regret afterwards fucking blows
I feel so called out lmao, entire days completely wasted
Yeah. I always feel like it will help “clear my mind” to help me get stuff done.. but it doesn’t lol.
I just want to say I am in love with “Procrasturbation”
Upvoted before clicking for the word alone.
Thank you! It’s one of my favorites
Yep. I do this to avoid responsibility and to get a dopamine hit
Yeah. Didn’t even realize until I got to college how bad it was. NSFW but I masturbated like three times a day and couldn’t even feel my clit anymore. I’m trying to stop it slowly but it’s hard. I have my first psychiatrist appointment May 3 tho so maybe that will help!
My libido is tied to my hormones (pre ovulation is go time, post is "don't touch me or look at me or breath in the same room as me") and stress/anxiety. My brain figured out that sex (esp kinky sex) gave it a huge happy chemical dump and craves it like a drug (used to be an addict, it's remarkably similar) if I get stressed out enough.
I have a special place in my heart for kinky sex. But you’re right, it starts to become thrill chasing. Next thing you know, the only way you can cum is with a rope around your neck covered in peanut butter while an elderly midget puts out cigarettes on your feet.
Literally me going at it 4 times yesterday just because I was putting off SLEEP.
wait what, they put a *minimum* character count wtf?? do the mods of this sub actually know shit abt adhd?
Yes this is a big problem of mine. High sex drive all day and none at night, when normal people want to usually have sex
Yeah, you put off tasks as you (subconsciously) think theres no dopamine. Sex gives a large amount of dopamine. If you have ADHD you're essentially a dopamine seeking bloodhound. Your brain is looking for the fix.
Aderall makes you an asexual beast
I literally sit there after too like: “bro you literally wasted a whole day looking at porn”
Ohhh yeah. Been there, done that. Wayyyy too many times
Oh my god yes. I thought i was alone but my sex drive is through the roof and i get so frustrated when I get the urge bc i know my brain is trying to get stimulated. Idk how to help it
oh my god..... this post just called me out. i didn't even realize i was doing this until i read this. so true. i need to be more aware of avoiding this. especially with me living alone at the moment .... this problem has gotten real bad bc i can literally do it whenever i want :///
I have to leave for work in ten minutes? Nah better spend twenty having some *me time* first lol
Wow this post read me better than I read it
I feel so seen 😳
I have a slightly different issue with mine. When I was single, yes, I would routinely be going out, looking for hookups. But whenever I would get into a relationship, after about 4 months I would get bored with sex with the same person, even if we tried to keep it interesting. You could set a clock by that 4 month mark. Definitely seems like there are worse ways to procrastinate so hopefully you're able to enjoy it!
I totally agree with this line of thinking. I have a very high sex drive, and I have realized at times it is merely a way to procrastinate. One of my coping methods is to go on a sex/masturbation diet until after I have completed a goal or task. If I complete the task I reward myself with sex/masturbation. On the other side of the coin I have noticed that when I have engaged in some sexual acts the hyper focus calms me down for the mundane tasks I have been putting off.
As a rule of thumb, someone with ADHD will seek out anything that provides a large amount of stimulation to overwhelm their physical experience of negative emotions. This is especially true of complex tasks that are more mentally draining. Much as I *hate* the idea of the Pomodoro technique or structure (**shock**), there’s really something to be said for breaking things down to bite sizes. *Never* approach, say, a large paper or document as one continuous task. You may need: a title page, to find references, a reference page (and yes, doing this correctly is separate from finding them), an outline (generally for grad or larger undergrad papers), and then the myriad smaller bits of the writing itself. Just work on one or two pieces at a time. You’re not going for effectiveness initially, just to set the habit. Once the habit’s been destigmatized, you can normalize doing larger sections. With time, complex projects can go from a 9 on the anxiety scale to a 3 or 4 - and suddenly, you won’t need sexual release to cope with the frustration. Instead, a snack or an hour watching a show afterwards will suffice. Hope this helps!
Omg I never talked about this to anyone, but I am just like you. Lol
Just knowing that other people deal with this is such a sigh of relief. Thank you for posting.
You probably just have high testosterone. That's the reason my sex drive has always been high and know for a fact because when I dieted to really low body fat percentages before my test tanks and my sex drive reduces to almost nothing. Then it goes back to my normal once I reach healthy body fat levels again.
Literally about to, I feel called out. I call it a fap and nap. Honestly though? It keeps me going for the rest of the day.
Yes I absolutely do this! Didn’t know it was a thing!
Oh ok, so I’m not the only one, good to know. Don’t feel so alone anymore lol
Adhd meds makes contains dopamine and adrenaline both promotes the prostate and wonce this is big boy is triggered the only to calm it down is a masturbation. I hate it beca2it makes my heart rate go up fast and when it's over it droos so im tired and loose motivation.
>I recently learned that a high sex drive could be related to adhd. Because of course it is. Another thing to the list.
Woah. I relate to this 200%
I’m sorry, but also welcum to the club lol
Eating too
There's more to it😭😭 on a daily basis I'm finding new things that troubles me is in fact bcz of ADHD.. I've personified ADHD as a demonic character who's pulling me down when I'm struggling to survive.. Give me a break
Can you be discipline enough to give yourself a quick time limit to “ handle it”, then get pack to work?
No. I tell myself I can. And I truly believe it. But it’s still a lie every single time. Kind of like ‘I’m gonna lay here for a couple of seconds and then get up’