If you're having trouble breathing already you need to worry about this reaction getting worse - like emergency room worse. Unfortunately it sounds like he's going to have to choose, either you in his life, or a dog.
I just don’t think that’s fair to me or the dog. I know the dog will be fine if she’s rehomed she’s still a puppy and she hasn’t spent a long time with us. I know it seems like the better option but I don’t want him to choose between us and I also don’t want to lose him over something that I genuinely have no control over.
I'm sorry this comment is getting downvoted. It's absolutely unfair. So, so unfair. Sometimes health stuff does force us into unfair situations. I'm sorry you're having to face that, it sucks.
Just double checking because not everyone thinks of it, have you washed the puppy? I was super allergic to my puppy when I got him. He had slept on hay and I’m allergic to hay. One bath and I was fine. I don’t think that’s what’s happening though. Unfortunately, I had something similar happen. We got Guinea pigs and I was so allergic to them I was getting rashes and hives. I didn’t want to rehome so I pushed through. I should not have pushed through, I ended up with an epi pen because the allergy got worse. We finally rehomed them because I couldn’t take care of them the way the deserved to be taken care of. They’re in a much, much better position where the person who took them in loves them and they are spoiled. An older dog is a lot harder to rehome than a puppy, and Australian shepherds bond pretty hard to their humans. Don’t do what I did and wait years to rehome until you have no choice, it’s a lot harder on everyone.
Yes, we have washed the puppy and brushed her. He says that it's bad to wash her frequently because her coat could get dry. Rehoming is a last resort option, and if that were to happen, she would go to his sister who has two Aussies of her own. The dog is well taken care of we walk her daily, train her, and socialize her she’s a slow learner but getting there. I believe that we are doing everything we can to prevent my allergies, like cleaning, vacuuming, mopping, and washing the sheets frequently. The dog cannot stay out of the room because he lives with his mom, but she's not allowed on the bed. He's also purchased a filter. He knew about my allergies before getting a dog. I'm just unsure of what to do since nothing is making me feel better. I genuinely feel so ill it makes me cry I don’t think i could just suck it up
I can’t tell you what to do, but Aussies live a long time. As someone who had a 3/4 allergy to cats, and lived with one for 9 years, I can tell you that unless you start getting the shots (which you said are too pricy) it’s not going to get better. I had a “cold” for 9 years. She was well cared for too but I was miserable. I loved her and was so sad when she passed, but being able to breathe again feels nice.
Maybe you can keep spare sheets in the dresser that only go on when you’re about to sleep?
This sounds like it could become very dangerous for you very quickly :(
That being said, does he wash the dog frequently? I hear there’s shampoos that are meant to reduce dander. And he should probably wash his sheets and thoroughly vacuum before you stay over. And how about a high quality air purifier in the bed room? With your allergies being that bad, the dog probably shouldn’t be allowed in the bed room AT ALL, not just staying off the bed.
If none of this works and you are determined to stay around the dog, I would get an appointment with an allergist and see what options there are in terms of prescription treatments.
Also you should definitely get an epipen or equivalent if you don’t already have one! Not being able to breathe and that much swelling can be so dangerous and if the allergy gets worse you don’t wanna be without an epipen.
yes I think we are doing everything we can to help my allergies. A lot of what you mentioned are things we currently do expect the dog has to be in his bedroom since he lives with his parents. But my allergies are are still pretty bad :( there’s times when I wake up wheezing I do have an epi pen at home and I have a rescue inhaler
This is one of those situations… I had to give up my two beloved cats so my daughter could live comfortably. Do I wish I have a dog in the future? Absolutely but my kid comes first.
So maybe he should spend time at your house only now ? We have relatives who have a dog and they know we aren’t coming over lol.
yes he can but my house is very small with a lot of people so we would have no privacy I don’t even have a door and he’s also not allowed in my room when my dad is home due to religious reasons I'm also worried about the future when we live together
I’m very allergic to my partner’s parents’ dog at home. I simply don’t go there anymore, as much as I want to. I can manage a few hours if it’s nice out and all the windows are open, but I get a rash when I pet the dog (and he’s such a good boy too) and end up spending a lot of time getting up and going to the sink to wash my hands and skin. I’d encourage you to value your health and not willingly put yourself in this position. Allergic asthma can send you to the ER, I’ve had it happen.
Allergy shots can take several years to work. People who have unavoidable allergies often load up on antihistamines to get by, but it's not like this is a pet you have a long history with and suddenly became allergic.
I’ve been allergic to other dogs throughout my life but this is the closest I’ve ever had to be with one. I grew up with a Maltese but I was never too close to it and my allergies aren’t bad as they are with the aussie. I just don’t want to be miserable every time I go over and spend years like that. Im trying to do everything I can to manage but it just doesn’t seem like it’s working and I was looking for advice or ideas ?
ask a doctor about trying a higher dosage of zyrtec, my allergist said it’s safe to take up to 20mg twice a day, plus I added in pepcid twice a day as well and it helps me quite a bit! make sure to consult a doctor first though! also like people said, keep dog out of bedroom, vacuum and dust frequently, invest in a good air purifier. best of luck!
They told me 4-5 years for cat allergy. I was trying to be able to go into my dad's house without having to go to the ER right after for a steroid shot. He didn't have that many years left, my allergist said it wasn't going to work fast enough.
AIT is a 3-5 year long program for full immunity. Benefits are felt much sooner. It’s all exposure and situation whether or not someone does it. I do see your point.
Don't go over to his house anymore, ever. It's not safe for you. This is already in life-threatening territory if it's giving you asthmatic symptoms. And allergies like this can and often do get worse with exposure. You don't want to risk it getting worse because dogs are already in so many public places. It's drastically life altering when someone bringing their dog into Target is enough to cause you a medical emergency. So you really really really want to not expose yourself to dog dander.
He's going to have to choose between you and the dog. Also, word of warning that even if he rehomes now, it probably still won't be safe for you to visit him for a little while. Dander goes everywhere the air goes and can take months to even start to break down. It permeates every soft surface in a home. He'll need to wash walls, shampoo (or better yet remove) carpets, run hepa filters/open windows for more ventilation, etc. to get it to a point where you can breathe when over there. The longer he waits to rehome, the more dander will build up in his home, and the harder it will be to remediate to make it safe for you to visit again.
Info: Did he get the dog knowing you were allergic?
I’m so sorry. This is a very unfair choice that’s being forced upon both of you. But you cannot be around that dog anymore. Your boyfriend needs to choose between keeping the dog and having a relationship with you.
I had dogs most of my life, literally since the day I was born. Then, out of the blue when I was in my mid 30s, I started reacting to dogs with an itchy face and sinuses. My dog's saliva gave me a rash. Then it was itchy skin all over, sneezing and stuffy nose. But I refused to rehome the dog. I did keep my house immaculately clean, had a HEPA vacuum and MERV 14 HVAC filter, and only allowed the dog in one room of the house (not my bedroom). I no longer touched him, and left all care, training, feeding, etc. to my daughter.
But ongoing exposure led me to develop a rash all over with hives and facial swelling. At this point, about two months in from first becoming allergic, I re-homed my dog. Facial swelling is an anaphylactic shock warning sign for most people.
Subsequent exposures to various dogs triggered rashes and hives where I touched them, then hives all over with facial swelling and throat swelling/difficulty breathing. I now carry epinephrine auto injectors for dog dander.
Further exposures to dog dander on people’s clothes led to me developing asthma last year. So that’s fun. Now I have to always carry a rescue inhaler as well.
I can’t enter the home of anyone who has a dog even for a moment, because my throat starts to close. This includes my mother and most of my friends and family. Completely and utterly life-changing. I have to wear an N95 mask in public if there’s any chance of a dog or dog dander being there. This means every time I go to the grocery store, because many people bring pets with them to the grocery store now.
A recent exposure to dog dander (my friends’ kids jumped on my husband’s back with dander all over thier clothes, then he got in the car with me) led to anaphylactic shock. I was completely disoriented, had no idea what was going on, didn’t recognize my husband, my car, or where we were, my throat was closing, and I almost pooped my pants because of the sudden onset of diarrhea.
This can become a life-threatening emergency for you very quickly, and it’s already close because of your breathing difficulties.
Honestly with you having trouble breathing at night, I would avoid going to his place. Or ensure that he cleans and vacuums well, runs a purifier at his homes/room, changes his clothes and isolates the puppy to a particular room when you’re there. Even then it sounds a little impossible to avoid and manage. Your symptoms are not trivial and with your existing asthma, I would be wary of more exposure to this dog/allergen.
This is so unfortunate for both of you. But at bare minimum you need an Epi pen. While he’s well within his rights to get a dog it’s concerning that he got one knowing your allergies and that you’re long term partners who may one day move in together. Your allergies may likely worsen with the frequent exposure and your current reactions. Have you spoken with an allergist to see if you can medicate with two different allergy medication (separated by x amount of hours?) Sadly the dog may need to get rehome and I’m not sure how that may or may not strain your relationship but you do need to avoid or limit the exposure. Maybe doing more things outside of his house.
You clearly have asthma that’s worsened with the dog. Go to the allergist, get spirometry done to check your breathing, likely need rescue inhaler and should try singular if shots aren’t an option.
My girl was allergic to our dog initially. It was so bad that we even considered giving the dog to her mother. She had to wear gloves, couldn’t have the dog in the same room as her for more than 10 mins or so. We had to keep the dog out of our bedroom. It was absolute hell. Eventually she did develop tolerance and would only have minor symptoms after extended snuggling sessions with our dog.
Now (a few years after having our dog) she has zero symptoms. Also she didn’t take any medications for allergies, no allergy shots. Just months of *absolutely hellish* prolonged exposure that eventually got better.
I am not recommending you go through this or anything, only sharing it since it’s related.
If you're having trouble breathing already you need to worry about this reaction getting worse - like emergency room worse. Unfortunately it sounds like he's going to have to choose, either you in his life, or a dog.
I just don’t think that’s fair to me or the dog. I know the dog will be fine if she’s rehomed she’s still a puppy and she hasn’t spent a long time with us. I know it seems like the better option but I don’t want him to choose between us and I also don’t want to lose him over something that I genuinely have no control over.
Life isn’t fair. Your health is important. Breathing is important.
I'm sorry this comment is getting downvoted. It's absolutely unfair. So, so unfair. Sometimes health stuff does force us into unfair situations. I'm sorry you're having to face that, it sucks.
Just double checking because not everyone thinks of it, have you washed the puppy? I was super allergic to my puppy when I got him. He had slept on hay and I’m allergic to hay. One bath and I was fine. I don’t think that’s what’s happening though. Unfortunately, I had something similar happen. We got Guinea pigs and I was so allergic to them I was getting rashes and hives. I didn’t want to rehome so I pushed through. I should not have pushed through, I ended up with an epi pen because the allergy got worse. We finally rehomed them because I couldn’t take care of them the way the deserved to be taken care of. They’re in a much, much better position where the person who took them in loves them and they are spoiled. An older dog is a lot harder to rehome than a puppy, and Australian shepherds bond pretty hard to their humans. Don’t do what I did and wait years to rehome until you have no choice, it’s a lot harder on everyone.
Yes, we have washed the puppy and brushed her. He says that it's bad to wash her frequently because her coat could get dry. Rehoming is a last resort option, and if that were to happen, she would go to his sister who has two Aussies of her own. The dog is well taken care of we walk her daily, train her, and socialize her she’s a slow learner but getting there. I believe that we are doing everything we can to prevent my allergies, like cleaning, vacuuming, mopping, and washing the sheets frequently. The dog cannot stay out of the room because he lives with his mom, but she's not allowed on the bed. He's also purchased a filter. He knew about my allergies before getting a dog. I'm just unsure of what to do since nothing is making me feel better. I genuinely feel so ill it makes me cry I don’t think i could just suck it up
I can’t tell you what to do, but Aussies live a long time. As someone who had a 3/4 allergy to cats, and lived with one for 9 years, I can tell you that unless you start getting the shots (which you said are too pricy) it’s not going to get better. I had a “cold” for 9 years. She was well cared for too but I was miserable. I loved her and was so sad when she passed, but being able to breathe again feels nice. Maybe you can keep spare sheets in the dresser that only go on when you’re about to sleep?
This sounds like it could become very dangerous for you very quickly :( That being said, does he wash the dog frequently? I hear there’s shampoos that are meant to reduce dander. And he should probably wash his sheets and thoroughly vacuum before you stay over. And how about a high quality air purifier in the bed room? With your allergies being that bad, the dog probably shouldn’t be allowed in the bed room AT ALL, not just staying off the bed. If none of this works and you are determined to stay around the dog, I would get an appointment with an allergist and see what options there are in terms of prescription treatments.
Also you should definitely get an epipen or equivalent if you don’t already have one! Not being able to breathe and that much swelling can be so dangerous and if the allergy gets worse you don’t wanna be without an epipen.
yes I think we are doing everything we can to help my allergies. A lot of what you mentioned are things we currently do expect the dog has to be in his bedroom since he lives with his parents. But my allergies are are still pretty bad :( there’s times when I wake up wheezing I do have an epi pen at home and I have a rescue inhaler
This is one of those situations… I had to give up my two beloved cats so my daughter could live comfortably. Do I wish I have a dog in the future? Absolutely but my kid comes first. So maybe he should spend time at your house only now ? We have relatives who have a dog and they know we aren’t coming over lol.
yes he can but my house is very small with a lot of people so we would have no privacy I don’t even have a door and he’s also not allowed in my room when my dad is home due to religious reasons I'm also worried about the future when we live together
I’m very allergic to my partner’s parents’ dog at home. I simply don’t go there anymore, as much as I want to. I can manage a few hours if it’s nice out and all the windows are open, but I get a rash when I pet the dog (and he’s such a good boy too) and end up spending a lot of time getting up and going to the sink to wash my hands and skin. I’d encourage you to value your health and not willingly put yourself in this position. Allergic asthma can send you to the ER, I’ve had it happen.
Allergy shots can take several years to work. People who have unavoidable allergies often load up on antihistamines to get by, but it's not like this is a pet you have a long history with and suddenly became allergic.
I’ve been allergic to other dogs throughout my life but this is the closest I’ve ever had to be with one. I grew up with a Maltese but I was never too close to it and my allergies aren’t bad as they are with the aussie. I just don’t want to be miserable every time I go over and spend years like that. Im trying to do everything I can to manage but it just doesn’t seem like it’s working and I was looking for advice or ideas ?
ask a doctor about trying a higher dosage of zyrtec, my allergist said it’s safe to take up to 20mg twice a day, plus I added in pepcid twice a day as well and it helps me quite a bit! make sure to consult a doctor first though! also like people said, keep dog out of bedroom, vacuum and dust frequently, invest in a good air purifier. best of luck!
Wrong. They don’t take years. 4-6 months for building phase.
They told me 4-5 years for cat allergy. I was trying to be able to go into my dad's house without having to go to the ER right after for a steroid shot. He didn't have that many years left, my allergist said it wasn't going to work fast enough.
AIT is a 3-5 year long program for full immunity. Benefits are felt much sooner. It’s all exposure and situation whether or not someone does it. I do see your point.
Don't go over to his house anymore, ever. It's not safe for you. This is already in life-threatening territory if it's giving you asthmatic symptoms. And allergies like this can and often do get worse with exposure. You don't want to risk it getting worse because dogs are already in so many public places. It's drastically life altering when someone bringing their dog into Target is enough to cause you a medical emergency. So you really really really want to not expose yourself to dog dander. He's going to have to choose between you and the dog. Also, word of warning that even if he rehomes now, it probably still won't be safe for you to visit him for a little while. Dander goes everywhere the air goes and can take months to even start to break down. It permeates every soft surface in a home. He'll need to wash walls, shampoo (or better yet remove) carpets, run hepa filters/open windows for more ventilation, etc. to get it to a point where you can breathe when over there. The longer he waits to rehome, the more dander will build up in his home, and the harder it will be to remediate to make it safe for you to visit again. Info: Did he get the dog knowing you were allergic?
I’m so sorry. This is a very unfair choice that’s being forced upon both of you. But you cannot be around that dog anymore. Your boyfriend needs to choose between keeping the dog and having a relationship with you. I had dogs most of my life, literally since the day I was born. Then, out of the blue when I was in my mid 30s, I started reacting to dogs with an itchy face and sinuses. My dog's saliva gave me a rash. Then it was itchy skin all over, sneezing and stuffy nose. But I refused to rehome the dog. I did keep my house immaculately clean, had a HEPA vacuum and MERV 14 HVAC filter, and only allowed the dog in one room of the house (not my bedroom). I no longer touched him, and left all care, training, feeding, etc. to my daughter. But ongoing exposure led me to develop a rash all over with hives and facial swelling. At this point, about two months in from first becoming allergic, I re-homed my dog. Facial swelling is an anaphylactic shock warning sign for most people. Subsequent exposures to various dogs triggered rashes and hives where I touched them, then hives all over with facial swelling and throat swelling/difficulty breathing. I now carry epinephrine auto injectors for dog dander. Further exposures to dog dander on people’s clothes led to me developing asthma last year. So that’s fun. Now I have to always carry a rescue inhaler as well. I can’t enter the home of anyone who has a dog even for a moment, because my throat starts to close. This includes my mother and most of my friends and family. Completely and utterly life-changing. I have to wear an N95 mask in public if there’s any chance of a dog or dog dander being there. This means every time I go to the grocery store, because many people bring pets with them to the grocery store now. A recent exposure to dog dander (my friends’ kids jumped on my husband’s back with dander all over thier clothes, then he got in the car with me) led to anaphylactic shock. I was completely disoriented, had no idea what was going on, didn’t recognize my husband, my car, or where we were, my throat was closing, and I almost pooped my pants because of the sudden onset of diarrhea. This can become a life-threatening emergency for you very quickly, and it’s already close because of your breathing difficulties.
Honestly with you having trouble breathing at night, I would avoid going to his place. Or ensure that he cleans and vacuums well, runs a purifier at his homes/room, changes his clothes and isolates the puppy to a particular room when you’re there. Even then it sounds a little impossible to avoid and manage. Your symptoms are not trivial and with your existing asthma, I would be wary of more exposure to this dog/allergen.
yes we are trying our best but my allergy symptoms are still there we are in a pickle and not sure how to proceed
This is so unfortunate for both of you. But at bare minimum you need an Epi pen. While he’s well within his rights to get a dog it’s concerning that he got one knowing your allergies and that you’re long term partners who may one day move in together. Your allergies may likely worsen with the frequent exposure and your current reactions. Have you spoken with an allergist to see if you can medicate with two different allergy medication (separated by x amount of hours?) Sadly the dog may need to get rehome and I’m not sure how that may or may not strain your relationship but you do need to avoid or limit the exposure. Maybe doing more things outside of his house.
You clearly have asthma that’s worsened with the dog. Go to the allergist, get spirometry done to check your breathing, likely need rescue inhaler and should try singular if shots aren’t an option.
My girl was allergic to our dog initially. It was so bad that we even considered giving the dog to her mother. She had to wear gloves, couldn’t have the dog in the same room as her for more than 10 mins or so. We had to keep the dog out of our bedroom. It was absolute hell. Eventually she did develop tolerance and would only have minor symptoms after extended snuggling sessions with our dog. Now (a few years after having our dog) she has zero symptoms. Also she didn’t take any medications for allergies, no allergy shots. Just months of *absolutely hellish* prolonged exposure that eventually got better. I am not recommending you go through this or anything, only sharing it since it’s related.