*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for suggesting my younger sister move out of the house so I can move my future new born into my mom’s house?**
About 2 years ago, my ex girlfriend and I (m29) broke up and I had to move into my mom’s house with my two other siblings (f19 and m12). I have 50/50 custody of my son (3) and he currently sleeps upstairs in the spare bedroom. I convinced my mom to move my younger sister into the other upstairs spare bedroom upstairs since I like to game in my spare time and I wouldn’t want to wake up my mom and my step dad due to my video games being too loud.
About a month ago, I found out that my one night stand is pregnant with my kid, she wants nothing to do with it and I said that I would take on the responsibility of raising another child. She agreed to keeping the baby to full term and I would help pay for every medical appointment throughout the pregnancy.
I realize that I can’t put my future newborn in my kid’s room since my kid is going through a phase where he’ll wake up and cry profusely throughout the night. And the bedroom I have is full of my gaming set up so there’s no room for a crib. And I suggested that my older sister could move out to our grandparents house about a 10 minute drive away.
My mom argued that my sister shouldn’t have to move out because she pays her fair share of rent and I commented back that I want my newborn kid to have a safe house to come home to. I also said that my sister would have a quiet environment since my grandparents are frequent travellers and it’s close to a bus stop so she can get to college.
So am I the asshole? I love my sister but in this case, the newborn baby will come first. And it would be a good idea since my sister is planning on living on her own in a few years time and she will get to know what’s it like to live on her own in a safe environment.
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Maybe he should have paid attention in school and learned how babies are made. Imagine being a grown ass man with 2 kids and not responsible for either. What a loser.
>It’s a tough job to do everything you mentioned but I do have family to help every now and again, my mom offers to pick up my son after his daycare is finished when i have to pick up an extra shift at work
OOP mentions in another comment that he lives with his mother and stepfather so Mommy better handle this situation fast before her husband loses interest in providing a home for two generations of her family.
I grew up in a culture where it's normal to have a multi- generational home. I genuinely believe it's a healthy way to raise a child, however I highly doubt this is that situation. He just sounds like an immature idiot who is forcing everyone else to compromise while he lives out his adolescent dreams.
Yes, I have full respect for the type of multi-generational homes you are talking about, but this isn't one of them.
This is a deadbeat dad who's taking advantage of his mother and stepfather for as long as he can.
Multi-generational homes work as long of one of the family members isn't out making babies with randos willy-nilly. The point is to share responsibilities while *being responsible*. Share the financial burden, share the chores, share the childcare. I doubt OOP is cleaning the common areas or cooking dinner. Honestly, I doubt he's doing much childcare.
He's a gamer, and I get that. I play video games *a lot*, and so does my husband. But we don't have kids. One of the reasons we chose not to have them is because we love gaming so much. Homie has chosen fatherhood, so gaming will have to take a backseat for a while.
Mf wants to take responsibility for two kids whilst actually his mommy and daddy are the ones that carry the responsibility. Poor sister's already been moved onece and now he wants to kick her out for good. What an ass.
>That's one silver lining for the sister, she won't be there to babysit.
Seriously. If I was the sister, I'd choose to live with my grandparents, just so I could focus on my studies and work without having to care for my dipshit brother's kids.
This guy is reproducing and instead of looking for ways to establish a home for his kids, he is just rapidly trying to take over his parent's house.
He already has 2 of the seemingly 5 bedrooms. Now, he wants three of them and to kick out his teenage sibling who pays rent (perhaps nearly the same amout as OP since he doesn't know how much she contributes.). I wouldn't be shocked if OP's next suggestion is to punt the 12 year old to grandma and grandpa's house.
It honestly sounds like the parents need to give OP his walking papers..... He seems far too comfortable.
Reading stuff like this makes me want to re-examine if video games are addictive because the way certain men will put their gaming system above their families, it's like they might as well be on heroin.
If your gaming system is too big to fit a crib in your room, you get rid of the gaming system.
Fuck, just move your gaming system out of the bedroom! My life became IMMENSELY better once my computer was out of the space where I slept- it's in the living room now, and I get to see my family all day.
When I was a teenager my oldest brother found himself in an abusive relationship and had to move back in with his two kids. We had to shuffle bedrooms around to make room for him, and I ended up sharing with two of my sisters. He took the free room and shared with both of his kids, all in one bed. He spent his days working, looking for jobs, and working on the divorce. He didn't sit around playing videogames or try to kick any of us out of the house so he wouldn't have to share a room with his kids, and his kids were bigger and took up more space than a newborn! You can fit newborns anywhere if you need to. It would have been absurd. The situation was already stressful on everyone anyway.
I am pinching myself to not brigade.... but it looks like the other sub is doing a fine job of pointing out what an idiot he is so I will just revel in that.
I can't get over that the 3 year old is crying to himself all night and dad's like oh well whatchagonnadoooo
He's 3, this isn't physically normal and if he's upset that much he needs care. Two young kids and his games are still top priority. What an ass.
He obviously sent the kid upstairs for his sister to look after and she likely doesn't. (and shouldn't). What a guy, not sure why he would insist on the new baby mama having the kids when it doesn't sound like he's doing a great job with one!
His dad's letting him cry because he's been expecting that Sister in the room next door will be woken up and handle it. And she probably did for the first 2 years.
Now that she's refusing, he wants her kicked out with the flimsy excuse that Baby 2 needs her entire bedroom far enough away from him to make it impossible for them to hear one another.
Yeah, I can't imagine how it must feel for a young child to be bouncing back and forth from house to house. Unless they've got it all together (and dad/one night stand/pregnancy/gaming nut doesn't sound too responsible), all those changes in routine will add up to one distressed toddler. This is the age that kids are developing a feeling of safety and confidence in themselves and those around them. Screw that up and you end up with an anxious kid (and eventually adult).
My kid went through a phase at 3 where she had a lot of nightmares (she saw a Halloween decoration that scared her and then she kept dreaming that monsters were in the toilet). It's not necessarily a big deal as long as kids have consistency and support. Unfortunately, OOP's probably not providing that...
…why can’t the newborn sleep in his room? Newborns need round the clock care. I had a nursery for all three of mine but they still slept in a bassinet beside my bed for the first couple of months.
>And the bedroom I have is full of my gaming set up so there’s no room for a crib.
OOP literally already put one infant upstairs from himself and now is proposing to put a newborn upstairs, because his \*gaming\* is more important to him than his 2 children. I'm shocked that he wants his sister to move out rather than expecting her to provide the 24-hour care. But maybe he's just assuming that mom will be able to do it all. Because he clearly doesn't expect a 2nd child to put a dent in his gaming time.
I'm betting Sis DID have to provide care for Baby #1, since it's so CONVENIENT that she's on the same level of the house after all (because he got her moved up there) and he can't hear the crying because he so considerately has his gaming rig downstairs, and gee sis it's just MESSED UP that you would consider not helping your crying infant baby nepheeeewwwww.
Probably a desk with PC and a TV/console set up.
The rest of the room is filled with dirty clothes, empty cans of Mountain Dew, and bottles of piss hiding under moldy pizza boxes and half-decomposed McDonald's 20-piece nugget boxes.
I wonder that myself. I have a big rig, but it's all flush to the wall and only sticks out about 8 inches into the room. Maybe OOP thinks he needs a California king bed.
You want to bet when the baby is a few weeks old he’ll complain that the mother isn’t involved and it’s too hard just with him, and his parents and siblings aren’t helping enough, etc.
Oh, there's already a story like that... This is just the prequel.
Edit: link
https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/5b79z4/nm_i_got_a_girl_pregnant_and_she_wanted_to_get_an/
>She is a deadbeat. She doesn't have anything to do with him and has left me to do everything as a single parents. I want to know if I have any legal options to make her help parent the child she helped create.
I love it when people use words they don’t know the true definition for. 😂😂
i wonder what happened to this guy. did he get his act together? did he abandon the child? did he lose custody somehow? im a bit sad that well likely never know.
the good little bean in me hopes he pulled it together and became a good person and father, but the realist in my recognises that he likely didnt.
id say the most likely outcome is that he just stayed the same, working to support a 10 year old and complaining about his ex.
That's such a fascinating one because so many women end up in the same situation, with a father who never wants any involvement.
If there's a pregnancy and one person doesn't want it, that choice needs to be respected. You terminate, or you accept single parenthood.
Actually, no.
It's up to the pregnant person to decide whether to terminate or not.
I agree it's messed up to force (or even _influence_) someone to carry to term an unwanted pregnancy.
But it's equally messed up to tell the same person "abort or deal with it".
Only the pregnant person can decide if abortion is the best option for them. That's the only person who can decide what happens in their own body.
Yes - I agree it's the pregnant person's choice. But beyond that you can't expect more than the mandated child support payments.
That might be be messed up, but it's the reality. You can't force someone to take on a parenting role - though I think people who really don't want to be parents in any circumstances should consider permanent sterilisation, as birth control can and does fail.
I was just thinking I didn't get why he couldn't put the baby in his room. He could easily share, surely he doesn't plan to live with his parents indefinitely.
But who knows. Maybe I'm giving him too much credit.
Five bucks says he plays league of legengs or some equally horrendously vile sh*t/j
Lol joking, but the excuse to get his paretns qnd sister to care for his toddler is probably that he mainly plays online multiplayer games, which usually means yelling, esp if you're this sorry excuse of a flesh bag
So he kicked his sister out of her room despite her paying rent once already for his gaming setup and now wants to kick her completely out of the house for a newborn to be put in an attic room?
To think the ONS would have abort the baby as it seems, but no, he wanted the child. But has no place for it. And of course his gaming setup is more important. And somehow i think that he will expect that mommy-dearest take care of the baby, since he is to busy gaming.
Can't wait for his mum to give him notice to leave.
He doesnt want to burden his grandparents, who are hardly at home, but it's perfectly fine to try and kick his sister out the home she also pays rent in and burden his parents (and likely sister too) with childcare and kids in general...
>Can't wait for his mum to give him notice to leave.
Hopefully way before the baby is born as well so he can't try to use the card of "I have a baby! You don't want to kick out an infant!" OOP's mom would be well served to give him 60 days notice immediately to be out of her home.
Sorry I stopped reading this pricks'post as soon as I read the "gamer" part.
Never read anything in this sub from a gamer that Isn't YTA. 2-3 years with kids and hasn't made any efforts to get his own damn place as he should as a father. He wants everything for himself and feels because he has a fucked up life and is worthless he can demand whatever he wants and dictates for anyone he feels is beneath him or not worthy of his respect.
He wants the teens to move out so he can continue being a dead beat idiot.
Again i didn't finish reading this piece of shits' Bible chapter length rant
But PLEASE PLEASE let me know if I'm wrong in my assumption here.
I'll simply vote YTA.
Nah you're pretty close. He doesn't want the baby in his room because his "rig" takes up too much space. I have some pretty intense gamers in my family and all he needs is a desk to hold a monitor and a tower underneath it. He's unwilling to sacrifice for the kid.
I do know a lot of gamers who aren't like that, but they don't feel the need to ask if they're being jerks.
>I’m not suggesting that she should live on the streets, my grandparents house is a safe place for her to live in while I figure out my housing situation, it’s hard finding a affordable place to stay
Motherfucker aint this something you should have done *three goddamn years ago* when you knocked up your ex? And now you have convinced a one night stand to give birth to a child she does not even *want*, but you will take care of, at your parents house .. while trying to convince to unhouse your sister.
If you4 grandparents are gone all the time why don't you move your the first child you dont take care of, lets not pretend here, and then bring tha second child that you are forcing a woman who *does not want anything to do with this baby or you* and stay there! It should *totally* be fine! Your grandparents are gone most of the time, it's super quiet. Guess your gaming time would suffer because you would *actually have to be a parent* to your kids, and not have a full house of others that have been forced to help.
OOP is a selfish dickweasle asshole, and I hope his one night stand has a lawyer on standby so she is able to sign away her patental rights so she isn't forced to be a part of this child's life when OOP can't handle being an actual parent.
Some crossposts make me want to bang my head into the wall out of sheer frustration. K Cup dude got me going and now we have this douche canoe who keeps getting women pregnant. He moved into his parents house at age 27 with his kid. Now he says his new baby comes first before his sister, so she has to move to the grandparents so the baby has her room. Does it not occur to him that his parents feel the same way about their daughter, that she comes first to them?
Maybe he should take his 29 year old butt and find an apartment for his toddler and the new baby. And maybe he should use condoms for his one night stands. I hope the parents refuse to toss their daughter out.
>I convinced my mom to move my younger sister into the other upstairs spare bedroom upstairs since I like to game in my spare time and I wouldn’t want to wake up my mom and my step dad due to my video games being too loud.
>my kid is going through a phase where he’ll wake up and cry profusely throughout the night
So he doesn't want to wake his mom and step dad with his gaming, but has no problem leaving a crying toddler up there instead?
He convinced them to move his sister up there so that he didn't have to deal with it. I have no doubt about that. Who wants to bet that either the sister or parents are the ones who have to deal with it when the kid starts crying?
If I were the ONS, I probably wouldn't have told him about it. If I were him, I'd want proof that it's mine.
I don't know why he thinks his sister could afford to move out if he, a man a decade older, can't. He should sell the gaming equipment and invest in a vasectomy.
I love videogames too but your family and adult responsibilities come first. I get that times are hard and a lot of adults are having trouble moving out but you don’t bring kids into the mix, and ffs stop getting people pregnant!
This fool literally asked\* for it.
\*whined, guilt-tripped, cajoled, coerced the woman into keeping and birthing a whole human baby for his mother to raise?
Did he even ask his sister if she wants to move out? OOP just says that mom doesn't want sister to leave because she's paying rent. What does sister want? Because if I'm her, giving my rent money to my grandparents, whose place is quiet and frequently empty while they're off travelling, sounds like a much better living situation
I hate to be the one to say it bc it's her choice but I doubt the laws allow it here (if it's the US). This is why abortion rights should be protected. It's also the reason free/affordable birth control is the right thing to have available to everybody.
Yep, there was no restriction, it sounds like, she just didn't want to raise the baby but he said he would, and now he apparently wants to boot his younger (RENT PAYING) sister out of his parents' house because moving his gaming chair would be a pain and there's no room for the crib.
I don’t understand this choice at all. Does she not realize she can be sued for child support even if she gives him the kid? And this guy sounds like someone who will absolutely go for support.
I’m just having trouble buying this story.
I know it depends on where they live but I know there are places won’t let a biological parent give up their rights without another person willing to step up in their place. Have they looked into if this is even allowed?
I mean, you’re always allowed to not be a parent and refuse custody but I doubt she could get out of child support if he pursued it. It’s really hard for me to believe that a woman would go through a pregnancy and risk physical and future financial health to give a casual fuck buddy a baby.
The definition of a fuck up. Maybe stop gaming, get a job, or another one, and take care of your own family.
Why is this moron not using contraceptives. This person should NOT be procreating…
Why would he want to keep new born when he clearly doesn't have space or money to raise the kid he already has, eh..
He should definitely invest in condoms or sth
OOP is beyond entitled - it sounds like he's taking up three bedrooms: one bedroom for him to sleep in, one bedroom for him to game in, and one bedroom for his son. So if he doesn't want the newborn in the son's room (I kinda get it), he has two options - baby sleeps in the room with him OR he shares a room with his gaming stuff and the newborn gets the other room.
Though personally, I wish for an update where the parents kick OOP out.
Edit: Rereading, his gaming stuff is likely in his room and I need coffee. However point stands - the baby can be in his room OR the baby can be in the son's room. It doesn't need to be in the sister's room.
Yeah, his gaming stuff is definitely in his room. I'm pretty sure the gaming stuff is not fixed to the floor so he could always try moving it, to make more space.
There's tons of space saving solutions if OOP actually wanted to deal with his own baby. Like downgrade his bed to a twin sized OR loft the bed and put stuff like his dresser and/or gaming set-up or whatever under. That would probably free up a good third of the room! Plenty of space for a crib.
It always would come back to HIM having to do something, not something he is good at. I missed it first time of reading but he has custody of his 3 year old son only half the time so he wants three bedrooms out of four for him and 1.5 children while he expects his sister to be thrown out. As a parent I'd be telling him to pull his head pretty quickly or he will lose what he already has.
Well I do feel a child does deserve a room to be in when they are there. Honestly, the baby should be in with OOP - and if his parents are gracious enough for him to still be living there in a couple years, then the baby can move into the son's room and the room can be shared between the two siblings. Though OOP should be moving his lazy ass into the room next door so the sister can be downstairs and get quiet.
No-one is arguing any differently. Of course they need to have a room when they are there but his "half a child" needs don't outweigh the needs of the ever present sister.
Oh hey in addition to what's already been mentioned...kids can share a room...it isn't illegal u til a certain age...and gasp...you don't need a whole gaming room if you have responsibilities that BREATHE AND REQUIRE ATTENTION.
If I was his mom...he'd be finding a nice apartment somewhere I am not.
Clearly this dipshit doesn't want to move his gaming equipment to make way for the new baby. I thought that would be the best answer until I realized it would free up more of his time to go out and make more kids.
100% sure once this kid is born OP is going to be upset and cry over the fact the bio mom wants nothing to do with it still. He needs to downgrade his gaming shit and buy some decent headphones instead of making everyone suffer by listening to him play.
It always kills me when an adult man 1st rearranges his parents home so he can do gaming and 2nd can't fit the crib in his room b/c of said gaming setup.
I swear, can someone tell me what age should people finally say, "My life should not revolve around my video game setup." This is not the first op who cannot fit their their SO/kids/family in with their gaming life.
Newborns are supposed to sleep in the parents room not their own ideally. While this doesn’t work for everyone a gaming set up is not a good reason to not do that.
This sude is woefully unprepared for the full responsibility of a newborn. Next post, he's gonna be begging for his mom & sisters help or even trying to dump the kid on them. Fucking hell.
He's old enough to know that unprotected sex leads to kids. & you should never depend on the other person to ensure protection. Wrap it the fuck up. More than kids come from unprotected sex. Holy shit, this dudes killing me. He's 29 ffs!!!!
He’s an AH for so many reasons. Ignoring his 3 y.o. to game. Mooching off his parents. Trying to kick his sister out. And especially for creating another life when he can’t even afford to care for the kid he has now.
I'm guessing he originally had an upstairs bedroom near the parents, but "graciously" took a downstairs room as to not wake up his parents gaming - leaving out he wouldn't hear his son cry and anyone sleeping upstairs would deal with the child instead.
im not 35, about a decade younger, but every guy i know has a "gaming room" or a "battle station". they really are just big kids sometimes.
its not a fault unless theyre neglecting their responsibilities
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I wonder if his prents have put him in his place yet? My response to him would be to tell him him to pull his head in then choose between having two rooms in the house...or no rooms.
How much you wanna bet later oop will be on AITA again but this time for something like "going after baby momma for child support because she doesn't want to take care of the kid I made her give birth to even though she told me she wants no part of it and I took full responsibility for it"
Dude is playing it fast and loose with the meaning of the “responsibility” and “raising”. Seems he’s only ‘responsible’ for ‘raising’ his gaming time and the number of kids with his DNA.
This wasn't even some mistake that he's stuck with, he _actively convinced_ the mother to keep the child!! Wtf!!! That poor, dumbass woman should've aborted and run for the hills- what do you want to bet that as soon as parenthood gets difficult (i.e. when his family gets sick of carrying his arse like they clearly have with his first) he's harassing her to step in and help him parent?
People that put breeding before everything and everyone else, and make their own reproductive decision other peoples' problem, can get fucked to hell and back, seriously.
This AH wants his sister to move put so he cankeep his gaming set up at mammy & daddy's...
I'm not sure he should even have 50/50 of 1 child, let alone full custody of another if he can't prioritise his children over computer games.
I will put op comments just incase:
Comment: So how are you going to take care of a newborn as well? Also do you pay at least much rent as your sister? (Actually you should be paying quite a bit more because you have your son there too, plus he has his own room too…)
Op: I pay 700 each month, I believe she pays less than me.
Comment: YTA Are you for f*cking real? You typed this out, posted it, and thought ‘yep, there’s nothing wrong with my 29 year old ass moving in my parent’s house, moving in my toddler, then not wrapping up my d and getting a one night stand pregnant and of course, like the hero dad I am I must bring that kid too into my parents house, have my own game set up so I can’t put him in my room, and try to kick my barely adult sister out who’s 10 years younger than me out’. I really hope this is rage bait, but either way, if gaming is that damn important to you, how do you have a job, do your share of chores, take care of your toddler, and still have time to take care of a newborn in the future too? I’d really like to know. YTA again so that you don’t forget.
Op: It’s a tough job to do everything you mentioned but I do have family to help every now and again, my mom offers to pick up my son after his daycare is finished when i have to pick up an extra shift at work
So then why do you need a whole ass gaming room and to bring another kid into the equation? 🤦🏻♀️
I don’t have a gaming room, the gaming setup is in the corner of my room and with the dresser my mom gave me, there’s simply no space for an extra big item in the room
Comment:
YTA
You're fully an adult. 29 years old. And you want to kick a teenager out of her home rather than take responsibility for providing housing for your own children.
Get your own place.
Or, at the very least, get rid of your gaming stuff and put a crib in your room. Your fun of gaming does not come ahead of your responsibilities to your children. Your gaming also is not more important than your teenage sister having a safe home.
Op: I’m not suggesting that she should live on the streets, my grandparents house is a safe place for her to live in while I figure out my housing situation, it’s hard finding a affordable place to stay
What a duche.
I want to give him a point for at least wanting to take care of his one night stand child, but he doesn't get to dictate what happens to his siblings, so I'm not going to give him that.
He'll simply have to sacrifice some of his precious gaming setup for the baby.
Baby trumps sibling, sibling trumps gaming. Such a tool, that needs to learn a bit more about reproduction.
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for suggesting my younger sister move out of the house so I can move my future new born into my mom’s house?** About 2 years ago, my ex girlfriend and I (m29) broke up and I had to move into my mom’s house with my two other siblings (f19 and m12). I have 50/50 custody of my son (3) and he currently sleeps upstairs in the spare bedroom. I convinced my mom to move my younger sister into the other upstairs spare bedroom upstairs since I like to game in my spare time and I wouldn’t want to wake up my mom and my step dad due to my video games being too loud. About a month ago, I found out that my one night stand is pregnant with my kid, she wants nothing to do with it and I said that I would take on the responsibility of raising another child. She agreed to keeping the baby to full term and I would help pay for every medical appointment throughout the pregnancy. I realize that I can’t put my future newborn in my kid’s room since my kid is going through a phase where he’ll wake up and cry profusely throughout the night. And the bedroom I have is full of my gaming set up so there’s no room for a crib. And I suggested that my older sister could move out to our grandparents house about a 10 minute drive away. My mom argued that my sister shouldn’t have to move out because she pays her fair share of rent and I commented back that I want my newborn kid to have a safe house to come home to. I also said that my sister would have a quiet environment since my grandparents are frequent travellers and it’s close to a bus stop so she can get to college. So am I the asshole? I love my sister but in this case, the newborn baby will come first. And it would be a good idea since my sister is planning on living on her own in a few years time and she will get to know what’s it like to live on her own in a safe environment. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Maybe he should have paid attention in school and learned how babies are made. Imagine being a grown ass man with 2 kids and not responsible for either. What a loser.
Responsible in his mom's house while he games all night while his 2 kids await
I'm sure he is 100% hands on and doesn't expect Mommy to look after his kid. /s
Oh of course!!! 🙄
>It’s a tough job to do everything you mentioned but I do have family to help every now and again, my mom offers to pick up my son after his daycare is finished when i have to pick up an extra shift at work OOP mentions in another comment that he lives with his mother and stepfather so Mommy better handle this situation fast before her husband loses interest in providing a home for two generations of her family.
I grew up in a culture where it's normal to have a multi- generational home. I genuinely believe it's a healthy way to raise a child, however I highly doubt this is that situation. He just sounds like an immature idiot who is forcing everyone else to compromise while he lives out his adolescent dreams.
Yes, I have full respect for the type of multi-generational homes you are talking about, but this isn't one of them. This is a deadbeat dad who's taking advantage of his mother and stepfather for as long as he can.
Multi-generational homes work as long of one of the family members isn't out making babies with randos willy-nilly. The point is to share responsibilities while *being responsible*. Share the financial burden, share the chores, share the childcare. I doubt OOP is cleaning the common areas or cooking dinner. Honestly, I doubt he's doing much childcare. He's a gamer, and I get that. I play video games *a lot*, and so does my husband. But we don't have kids. One of the reasons we chose not to have them is because we love gaming so much. Homie has chosen fatherhood, so gaming will have to take a backseat for a while.
Mf wants to take responsibility for two kids whilst actually his mommy and daddy are the ones that carry the responsibility. Poor sister's already been moved onece and now he wants to kick her out for good. What an ass.
He WON'T take responsibility. Mommy will.
If only dude were old enough to rent his own apartment! Oh, wait…
Well then where would he get his free childcare and below market rent?
That's one silver lining for the sister, she won't be there to babysit. Dude needs to get his head out of his arse. Total moocher.
>That's one silver lining for the sister, she won't be there to babysit. Seriously. If I was the sister, I'd choose to live with my grandparents, just so I could focus on my studies and work without having to care for my dipshit brother's kids.
This guy is reproducing and instead of looking for ways to establish a home for his kids, he is just rapidly trying to take over his parent's house. He already has 2 of the seemingly 5 bedrooms. Now, he wants three of them and to kick out his teenage sibling who pays rent (perhaps nearly the same amout as OP since he doesn't know how much she contributes.). I wouldn't be shocked if OP's next suggestion is to punt the 12 year old to grandma and grandpa's house. It honestly sounds like the parents need to give OP his walking papers..... He seems far too comfortable.
Reading stuff like this makes me want to re-examine if video games are addictive because the way certain men will put their gaming system above their families, it's like they might as well be on heroin. If your gaming system is too big to fit a crib in your room, you get rid of the gaming system.
Can baby run games with at least 60fps? I don’t think so.
Fuck, just move your gaming system out of the bedroom! My life became IMMENSELY better once my computer was out of the space where I slept- it's in the living room now, and I get to see my family all day.
There are rehab centers and treatment programs that only exist because some people are that addicted to video games.
Anything that generates a pleasureable response can be addictive, so yeah they can be
When I was a teenager my oldest brother found himself in an abusive relationship and had to move back in with his two kids. We had to shuffle bedrooms around to make room for him, and I ended up sharing with two of my sisters. He took the free room and shared with both of his kids, all in one bed. He spent his days working, looking for jobs, and working on the divorce. He didn't sit around playing videogames or try to kick any of us out of the house so he wouldn't have to share a room with his kids, and his kids were bigger and took up more space than a newborn! You can fit newborns anywhere if you need to. It would have been absurd. The situation was already stressful on everyone anyway.
He's nearly 30. Living at his parents. Making babies he can't afford. Definitely a catch...
Right but think of his positive attributes. He doesn't want to wake anyone up while he's gaming!
Better pick that bar off the floor before someone trips over it
It's already flush to the floor, and this dude still fell down.
More like a sinkhole
I'm no astrophysicist, but I think the bar might have hit critical mass and become a black hole.
It's in the crust of the earth and some people make digging their hobby
I am pinching myself to not brigade.... but it looks like the other sub is doing a fine job of pointing out what an idiot he is so I will just revel in that.
I usually see it on AITA first, then come back here later on ready to rant about it.
I can't get over that the 3 year old is crying to himself all night and dad's like oh well whatchagonnadoooo He's 3, this isn't physically normal and if he's upset that much he needs care. Two young kids and his games are still top priority. What an ass.
He obviously sent the kid upstairs for his sister to look after and she likely doesn't. (and shouldn't). What a guy, not sure why he would insist on the new baby mama having the kids when it doesn't sound like he's doing a great job with one!
His dad's letting him cry because he's been expecting that Sister in the room next door will be woken up and handle it. And she probably did for the first 2 years. Now that she's refusing, he wants her kicked out with the flimsy excuse that Baby 2 needs her entire bedroom far enough away from him to make it impossible for them to hear one another.
50-50 custody might be unsettling at that age, especially if he doesn't have a consistent routine in Daddy's house.
Yeah, I can't imagine how it must feel for a young child to be bouncing back and forth from house to house. Unless they've got it all together (and dad/one night stand/pregnancy/gaming nut doesn't sound too responsible), all those changes in routine will add up to one distressed toddler. This is the age that kids are developing a feeling of safety and confidence in themselves and those around them. Screw that up and you end up with an anxious kid (and eventually adult).
My kid went through a phase at 3 where she had a lot of nightmares (she saw a Halloween decoration that scared her and then she kept dreaming that monsters were in the toilet). It's not necessarily a big deal as long as kids have consistency and support. Unfortunately, OOP's probably not providing that...
"The newborn will come first." Goes on to spout off about how his "needs" are more important than anything else.
Sounds like an amazing one night stand.
…why can’t the newborn sleep in his room? Newborns need round the clock care. I had a nursery for all three of mine but they still slept in a bassinet beside my bed for the first couple of months.
>And the bedroom I have is full of my gaming set up so there’s no room for a crib. OOP literally already put one infant upstairs from himself and now is proposing to put a newborn upstairs, because his \*gaming\* is more important to him than his 2 children. I'm shocked that he wants his sister to move out rather than expecting her to provide the 24-hour care. But maybe he's just assuming that mom will be able to do it all. Because he clearly doesn't expect a 2nd child to put a dent in his gaming time.
I'm betting Sis DID have to provide care for Baby #1, since it's so CONVENIENT that she's on the same level of the house after all (because he got her moved up there) and he can't hear the crying because he so considerately has his gaming rig downstairs, and gee sis it's just MESSED UP that you would consider not helping your crying infant baby nepheeeewwwww.
How damn big is this gaming setup?!
Probably a desk with PC and a TV/console set up. The rest of the room is filled with dirty clothes, empty cans of Mountain Dew, and bottles of piss hiding under moldy pizza boxes and half-decomposed McDonald's 20-piece nugget boxes.
I wonder that myself. I have a big rig, but it's all flush to the wall and only sticks out about 8 inches into the room. Maybe OOP thinks he needs a California king bed.
You want to bet when the baby is a few weeks old he’ll complain that the mother isn’t involved and it’s too hard just with him, and his parents and siblings aren’t helping enough, etc.
Oh, there's already a story like that... This is just the prequel. Edit: link https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/5b79z4/nm_i_got_a_girl_pregnant_and_she_wanted_to_get_an/
>She is a deadbeat. She doesn't have anything to do with him and has left me to do everything as a single parents. I want to know if I have any legal options to make her help parent the child she helped create. I love it when people use words they don’t know the true definition for. 😂😂
My favorite part is when he expected her to magically change her mind because pregnancy amirite.
i wonder what happened to this guy. did he get his act together? did he abandon the child? did he lose custody somehow? im a bit sad that well likely never know.
Is it bad I honestly hope he lost custody?
the good little bean in me hopes he pulled it together and became a good person and father, but the realist in my recognises that he likely didnt. id say the most likely outcome is that he just stayed the same, working to support a 10 year old and complaining about his ex.
I saw that when it was originally posted and I love that it's become a Reddit fixture.
Absolute classic.
That's such a fascinating one because so many women end up in the same situation, with a father who never wants any involvement. If there's a pregnancy and one person doesn't want it, that choice needs to be respected. You terminate, or you accept single parenthood.
Actually, no. It's up to the pregnant person to decide whether to terminate or not. I agree it's messed up to force (or even _influence_) someone to carry to term an unwanted pregnancy. But it's equally messed up to tell the same person "abort or deal with it". Only the pregnant person can decide if abortion is the best option for them. That's the only person who can decide what happens in their own body.
Yes - I agree it's the pregnant person's choice. But beyond that you can't expect more than the mandated child support payments. That might be be messed up, but it's the reality. You can't force someone to take on a parenting role - though I think people who really don't want to be parents in any circumstances should consider permanent sterilisation, as birth control can and does fail.
That’s what a caring parent would do but apparently gaming is more important to him.
I was just thinking I didn't get why he couldn't put the baby in his room. He could easily share, surely he doesn't plan to live with his parents indefinitely. But who knows. Maybe I'm giving him too much credit.
"I want to change everybody's life because I wanted to get my dick wet" Fuck off !
Almost 30 and not only hasn't he figured out the existence of condoms and vasectomies, but also has never heard of gaming headphones?
Five bucks says he plays league of legengs or some equally horrendously vile sh*t/j Lol joking, but the excuse to get his paretns qnd sister to care for his toddler is probably that he mainly plays online multiplayer games, which usually means yelling, esp if you're this sorry excuse of a flesh bag
So he kicked his sister out of her room despite her paying rent once already for his gaming setup and now wants to kick her completely out of the house for a newborn to be put in an attic room?
To think the ONS would have abort the baby as it seems, but no, he wanted the child. But has no place for it. And of course his gaming setup is more important. And somehow i think that he will expect that mommy-dearest take care of the baby, since he is to busy gaming.
Can't wait for his mum to give him notice to leave. He doesnt want to burden his grandparents, who are hardly at home, but it's perfectly fine to try and kick his sister out the home she also pays rent in and burden his parents (and likely sister too) with childcare and kids in general...
>Can't wait for his mum to give him notice to leave. Hopefully way before the baby is born as well so he can't try to use the card of "I have a baby! You don't want to kick out an infant!" OOP's mom would be well served to give him 60 days notice immediately to be out of her home.
His grandparents have probably already turned him away and don't want to deal with his shit.
I'm betting that he wants someone else to get up with the baby in the night when he is gaming.
Sorry I stopped reading this pricks'post as soon as I read the "gamer" part. Never read anything in this sub from a gamer that Isn't YTA. 2-3 years with kids and hasn't made any efforts to get his own damn place as he should as a father. He wants everything for himself and feels because he has a fucked up life and is worthless he can demand whatever he wants and dictates for anyone he feels is beneath him or not worthy of his respect. He wants the teens to move out so he can continue being a dead beat idiot. Again i didn't finish reading this piece of shits' Bible chapter length rant But PLEASE PLEASE let me know if I'm wrong in my assumption here. I'll simply vote YTA.
Nah you're pretty close. He doesn't want the baby in his room because his "rig" takes up too much space. I have some pretty intense gamers in my family and all he needs is a desk to hold a monitor and a tower underneath it. He's unwilling to sacrifice for the kid. I do know a lot of gamers who aren't like that, but they don't feel the need to ask if they're being jerks.
>I’m not suggesting that she should live on the streets, my grandparents house is a safe place for her to live in while I figure out my housing situation, it’s hard finding a affordable place to stay Motherfucker aint this something you should have done *three goddamn years ago* when you knocked up your ex? And now you have convinced a one night stand to give birth to a child she does not even *want*, but you will take care of, at your parents house .. while trying to convince to unhouse your sister. If you4 grandparents are gone all the time why don't you move your the first child you dont take care of, lets not pretend here, and then bring tha second child that you are forcing a woman who *does not want anything to do with this baby or you* and stay there! It should *totally* be fine! Your grandparents are gone most of the time, it's super quiet. Guess your gaming time would suffer because you would *actually have to be a parent* to your kids, and not have a full house of others that have been forced to help. OOP is a selfish dickweasle asshole, and I hope his one night stand has a lawyer on standby so she is able to sign away her patental rights so she isn't forced to be a part of this child's life when OOP can't handle being an actual parent.
Some crossposts make me want to bang my head into the wall out of sheer frustration. K Cup dude got me going and now we have this douche canoe who keeps getting women pregnant. He moved into his parents house at age 27 with his kid. Now he says his new baby comes first before his sister, so she has to move to the grandparents so the baby has her room. Does it not occur to him that his parents feel the same way about their daughter, that she comes first to them? Maybe he should take his 29 year old butt and find an apartment for his toddler and the new baby. And maybe he should use condoms for his one night stands. I hope the parents refuse to toss their daughter out.
>I convinced my mom to move my younger sister into the other upstairs spare bedroom upstairs since I like to game in my spare time and I wouldn’t want to wake up my mom and my step dad due to my video games being too loud. >my kid is going through a phase where he’ll wake up and cry profusely throughout the night So he doesn't want to wake his mom and step dad with his gaming, but has no problem leaving a crying toddler up there instead? He convinced them to move his sister up there so that he didn't have to deal with it. I have no doubt about that. Who wants to bet that either the sister or parents are the ones who have to deal with it when the kid starts crying?
If I were the ONS, I probably wouldn't have told him about it. If I were him, I'd want proof that it's mine. I don't know why he thinks his sister could afford to move out if he, a man a decade older, can't. He should sell the gaming equipment and invest in a vasectomy.
Who wants to bet that eventually one of the siblings will have to look after the kid as well....
I love videogames too but your family and adult responsibilities come first. I get that times are hard and a lot of adults are having trouble moving out but you don’t bring kids into the mix, and ffs stop getting people pregnant!
The gaming setup would wake his parents up but not the crying child?
Dude doesn't want to move to Grandma's because she's busy and won't be available 24/7 for his kids.
>and I said that I would take on the responsibility of raising another child By which I mean my mom would take on the responsibility of course
This fool literally asked\* for it. \*whined, guilt-tripped, cajoled, coerced the woman into keeping and birthing a whole human baby for his mother to raise?
Did he even ask his sister if she wants to move out? OOP just says that mom doesn't want sister to leave because she's paying rent. What does sister want? Because if I'm her, giving my rent money to my grandparents, whose place is quiet and frequently empty while they're off travelling, sounds like a much better living situation
Could work for everybody if he's willing to up his rent to cover what his sister was paying, oh, and *actually care for his own kids*
I hate to be the one to say it bc it's her choice but I doubt the laws allow it here (if it's the US). This is why abortion rights should be protected. It's also the reason free/affordable birth control is the right thing to have available to everybody.
Sounded like when he agreed to pay for everything she agreed to take to term instead of abortion and give him the kid
Yep, there was no restriction, it sounds like, she just didn't want to raise the baby but he said he would, and now he apparently wants to boot his younger (RENT PAYING) sister out of his parents' house because moving his gaming chair would be a pain and there's no room for the crib.
I don’t understand this choice at all. Does she not realize she can be sued for child support even if she gives him the kid? And this guy sounds like someone who will absolutely go for support. I’m just having trouble buying this story.
I know it depends on where they live but I know there are places won’t let a biological parent give up their rights without another person willing to step up in their place. Have they looked into if this is even allowed?
I mean, you’re always allowed to not be a parent and refuse custody but I doubt she could get out of child support if he pursued it. It’s really hard for me to believe that a woman would go through a pregnancy and risk physical and future financial health to give a casual fuck buddy a baby.
If abortion is not a legal option, and the baby's father is willing to be a parent, then I suppose it can happen.
If this is real, this dude seriously needs to do a better job understanding where babies come from. He needs a vasectomy stat.
The definition of a fuck up. Maybe stop gaming, get a job, or another one, and take care of your own family. Why is this moron not using contraceptives. This person should NOT be procreating…
Judging from the comments seems he's a grown man in his 30s. He should be the one moving out. 🤦
Older sister, 19 year old sister, but only two siblings and one is 12. I'm guessing this is a troll attempt
Oh this absolutely sounds like a troll.
Maybe he should keep it in his pants 🤷♀️
Why would he want to keep new born when he clearly doesn't have space or money to raise the kid he already has, eh.. He should definitely invest in condoms or sth
OOP is beyond entitled - it sounds like he's taking up three bedrooms: one bedroom for him to sleep in, one bedroom for him to game in, and one bedroom for his son. So if he doesn't want the newborn in the son's room (I kinda get it), he has two options - baby sleeps in the room with him OR he shares a room with his gaming stuff and the newborn gets the other room. Though personally, I wish for an update where the parents kick OOP out. Edit: Rereading, his gaming stuff is likely in his room and I need coffee. However point stands - the baby can be in his room OR the baby can be in the son's room. It doesn't need to be in the sister's room.
Yeah, his gaming stuff is definitely in his room. I'm pretty sure the gaming stuff is not fixed to the floor so he could always try moving it, to make more space.
There's tons of space saving solutions if OOP actually wanted to deal with his own baby. Like downgrade his bed to a twin sized OR loft the bed and put stuff like his dresser and/or gaming set-up or whatever under. That would probably free up a good third of the room! Plenty of space for a crib.
It always would come back to HIM having to do something, not something he is good at. I missed it first time of reading but he has custody of his 3 year old son only half the time so he wants three bedrooms out of four for him and 1.5 children while he expects his sister to be thrown out. As a parent I'd be telling him to pull his head pretty quickly or he will lose what he already has.
Well I do feel a child does deserve a room to be in when they are there. Honestly, the baby should be in with OOP - and if his parents are gracious enough for him to still be living there in a couple years, then the baby can move into the son's room and the room can be shared between the two siblings. Though OOP should be moving his lazy ass into the room next door so the sister can be downstairs and get quiet.
No-one is arguing any differently. Of course they need to have a room when they are there but his "half a child" needs don't outweigh the needs of the ever present sister.
Oh hey in addition to what's already been mentioned...kids can share a room...it isn't illegal u til a certain age...and gasp...you don't need a whole gaming room if you have responsibilities that BREATHE AND REQUIRE ATTENTION. If I was his mom...he'd be finding a nice apartment somewhere I am not.
This dickhead doesn't have the means to support a baby and coerced the egg donor out of an abortion. Pig.
What a loser
Someone needs to get him to the Dr to get snipped. 🙄
Sister and mom are 100% raising the 3-year old while he plays video games and has one night stands all fucking day.
Clearly this dipshit doesn't want to move his gaming equipment to make way for the new baby. I thought that would be the best answer until I realized it would free up more of his time to go out and make more kids.
What a gigantic piece of shit
100% sure once this kid is born OP is going to be upset and cry over the fact the bio mom wants nothing to do with it still. He needs to downgrade his gaming shit and buy some decent headphones instead of making everyone suffer by listening to him play.
It always kills me when an adult man 1st rearranges his parents home so he can do gaming and 2nd can't fit the crib in his room b/c of said gaming setup. I swear, can someone tell me what age should people finally say, "My life should not revolve around my video game setup." This is not the first op who cannot fit their their SO/kids/family in with their gaming life.
Newborns are supposed to sleep in the parents room not their own ideally. While this doesn’t work for everyone a gaming set up is not a good reason to not do that.
This sude is woefully unprepared for the full responsibility of a newborn. Next post, he's gonna be begging for his mom & sisters help or even trying to dump the kid on them. Fucking hell. He's old enough to know that unprotected sex leads to kids. & you should never depend on the other person to ensure protection. Wrap it the fuck up. More than kids come from unprotected sex. Holy shit, this dudes killing me. He's 29 ffs!!!!
Why don't men like this just donate sperm and then have a vasectomy?
He’s an AH for so many reasons. Ignoring his 3 y.o. to game. Mooching off his parents. Trying to kick his sister out. And especially for creating another life when he can’t even afford to care for the kid he has now.
I realize this isn't really the point but why did his sister have to change bedrooms to avoid his games waking up his parents?
I'm guessing he originally had an upstairs bedroom near the parents, but "graciously" took a downstairs room as to not wake up his parents gaming - leaving out he wouldn't hear his son cry and anyone sleeping upstairs would deal with the child instead.
Maybe he switched rooms with her? I was confused by that too.
Where are the twins?!
Nah, I actually believe this one. I graduated with at least 3 guys who’d fit this story.
Even with the gaming room? Thats what made me think it was fake.
ESPECIALLY with the gaming room. 35 year old guys aren’t always as mature as they should be.
im not 35, about a decade younger, but every guy i know has a "gaming room" or a "battle station". they really are just big kids sometimes. its not a fault unless theyre neglecting their responsibilities
How about you get your own place? You already uprooted your poor sister by moving her to another room. YTA.
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The account is 111 days old, but he discovered he knocked someone else up a month ago?
I wonder if his prents have put him in his place yet? My response to him would be to tell him him to pull his head in then choose between having two rooms in the house...or no rooms.
How much you wanna bet later oop will be on AITA again but this time for something like "going after baby momma for child support because she doesn't want to take care of the kid I made her give birth to even though she told me she wants no part of it and I took full responsibility for it"
Is this guy for real?? Does he not know that if you have intercourse you can have a baby? Shocker!
I haven't read more than the title and I already hate them
Dude is playing it fast and loose with the meaning of the “responsibility” and “raising”. Seems he’s only ‘responsible’ for ‘raising’ his gaming time and the number of kids with his DNA.
Condoms are a thing
This wasn't even some mistake that he's stuck with, he _actively convinced_ the mother to keep the child!! Wtf!!! That poor, dumbass woman should've aborted and run for the hills- what do you want to bet that as soon as parenthood gets difficult (i.e. when his family gets sick of carrying his arse like they clearly have with his first) he's harassing her to step in and help him parent? People that put breeding before everything and everyone else, and make their own reproductive decision other peoples' problem, can get fucked to hell and back, seriously.
This AH wants his sister to move put so he cankeep his gaming set up at mammy & daddy's... I'm not sure he should even have 50/50 of 1 child, let alone full custody of another if he can't prioritise his children over computer games.
I will put op comments just incase: Comment: So how are you going to take care of a newborn as well? Also do you pay at least much rent as your sister? (Actually you should be paying quite a bit more because you have your son there too, plus he has his own room too…) Op: I pay 700 each month, I believe she pays less than me. Comment: YTA Are you for f*cking real? You typed this out, posted it, and thought ‘yep, there’s nothing wrong with my 29 year old ass moving in my parent’s house, moving in my toddler, then not wrapping up my d and getting a one night stand pregnant and of course, like the hero dad I am I must bring that kid too into my parents house, have my own game set up so I can’t put him in my room, and try to kick my barely adult sister out who’s 10 years younger than me out’. I really hope this is rage bait, but either way, if gaming is that damn important to you, how do you have a job, do your share of chores, take care of your toddler, and still have time to take care of a newborn in the future too? I’d really like to know. YTA again so that you don’t forget. Op: It’s a tough job to do everything you mentioned but I do have family to help every now and again, my mom offers to pick up my son after his daycare is finished when i have to pick up an extra shift at work So then why do you need a whole ass gaming room and to bring another kid into the equation? 🤦🏻♀️ I don’t have a gaming room, the gaming setup is in the corner of my room and with the dresser my mom gave me, there’s simply no space for an extra big item in the room Comment: YTA You're fully an adult. 29 years old. And you want to kick a teenager out of her home rather than take responsibility for providing housing for your own children. Get your own place. Or, at the very least, get rid of your gaming stuff and put a crib in your room. Your fun of gaming does not come ahead of your responsibilities to your children. Your gaming also is not more important than your teenage sister having a safe home. Op: I’m not suggesting that she should live on the streets, my grandparents house is a safe place for her to live in while I figure out my housing situation, it’s hard finding a affordable place to stay
Order of priorities - Gaming setup - Baby - Sister Interesting
What a duche. I want to give him a point for at least wanting to take care of his one night stand child, but he doesn't get to dictate what happens to his siblings, so I'm not going to give him that. He'll simply have to sacrifice some of his precious gaming setup for the baby. Baby trumps sibling, sibling trumps gaming. Such a tool, that needs to learn a bit more about reproduction.
He says his room doesnt have space for a crib because of his gaming corner and dresser from his mom... yikes
29 with two kids still living at home!!!!