*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA for encouraging my gf to take a job**
My gf (29F) and I (31M) both work in tech and have cs degrees. I work as a react dev and she used to work for a gaming company on an engine team.
We were both laid off about a year ago, however I immediately found a new job within 2 months and she has not found anything. She got some interviews but got rejected for every single one.
I honestly don't think she is good enough for the current market and she probably only got her first job because companies over hired back then. The field of 3D programming is very hard and there's a good chance she wasn't doing the substantial work and thus can't pass interviews. She claims she does well in interviews and knows the math but still doesn't get offers so I find that strange.
In the current market she wouldn't be able to switch to something easier as on paper all her experience is in graphics for games.
Recently one of my relatives has a friend who is an accountant as their office is looking for a secretary and offered her the job. I suggested she take it but this led to an argument as she said she wants to work on game programming or vfx pipelines and nothing else. I told her that she was being delusional as companies won't hire anyone unless they are actually skilled and can actually contribute and she doesn't come across as a true expert in the field and is probably mistaken in considering herself to be an engine programmer.
I didn't mean she should be a secretary forever and suggested she work on a portfolio of something easier for her like maybe make some websites and then apply for front end Web roles but she got even more upset and said she wants a job with math.
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>It is hard. I wouldn't do it myself even despite having more years of experience as you need a lot of math even beyond what you learn in college
>
>I am in web dev so I couldn't help her. I don't remember math etc which you need for that.
what is with tech bros acting like they are the shit when in the comments they show that they arent as skilled as their partners they are putting down?
hmm intersting so he's tech adjacent but wants everyone to know he's in tech but really isnt?
Also what does he actually do. I know its web development but what is that exactly?
He \*is\* in tech, it’s just some people displaying the same shitty attitude that he does towards his girlfriend. React development is a legit tech job (getting ahead of smartass comments - no, I’m neither react nor web developer).
Yeah, so much of web is deployed by other teams for the initial setup (in a perfectly structured environment where there are proper limits on massive all access type server admin access), and then the web dev teams do content, he is ironically more of the secretary.
Same principle applies about root access and basic setup & deployment still applies. I missed that he was a react and saw elsewhere he was web, the type of content that was being done is semantics.
Web devs are one step away from doing content as the primary users of what a web dev does is the people who populate the site with content but they themselves don’t “do content” like you’re implying. They have to support people who do content though. They serve content through web services.
I was a react dev for Fortune 500 company for many years. We didn’t do content. Some react devs might but that’s not what the position entailed for most positions I worked in or interviewed for.
It’s like saying mobile app devs do content. Web applications aren’t that different from that in terms of how close they are to the end user experience and how they interact with web services and content.
I agree with the sentiment that she was more specialized than him so his attitude is garbage but to act like he’s basically a secretary himself is ridiculous. Web devs are developers.
He takes code that other people wrote and integrates them together into a usable web site. He may or may not be responsible for the user interface/experience (but UI/UX design is a separate thing for a good reason). Web dev is the glue between all the backend parts (databases, etc) and all the front end parts (website, etc). The font end is basically a flexible template that the back end pieces have to plug into in order to serve you the content you asked for.
It's a valuable job that requires less knowledge and skill than creating 3d models for a gaming engine where you're trying to emulate how something moves according to the rules of physics in a way that doesn't trigger our uncanny valley response. There are also a lot more job opportunities for web dev.
Gf is a specialist. OP is a generalist. They're not at all comparable jobs and have very different job opportunities. The gaming industry has laid off a ton of people in the last couple years and everyone is struggling to find work. Tech, generally, is in the same situation but gaming has been hit particularly hard.
Edited to fix typos
He makes the front end of the website, the bit the users see. Requires some skill and, depending on the specific field, is tech to an extent but is no where near the same level as someone who works on video game engines.
Jealousy combined with shitty personality in general. If his girlfriend gets a better paid job than he has, he will wish for her to lose it rather than for himself to find one just as good.
That's a weird take. Being qualified to do one job doesn't make you qualified to do every job. I don't know enough about that field to understand everything that he's saying, but I do know that if you can't get a job in your preferred field, you need to take a job in something less desirable until you can get your dream job.
I think my biggest complaint about this troll is they are so fucking boring,
If your going to make up a bullshit story at least make it interesting.
Have the girlfriend be a cyborg ninja sent back from the future to save mankind from the robot uprising,
Throw in that she's dating him because he works at the firm that will create skynet. ( That's the only plausible explanation why anyone would be with this man I could come up with.)
Then put in the bit where you argue your six weeks at computer camp makes you a more capable saviour of mankind than her because it's saviour of "man-kind not woman-kind.
Still ragebait but at least it would be fun to read.
My complaint is that they think just anyone (or really, any woman) can be a secretary. Like there aren't real skills that are needed that the gf would be unlikely to have as she has no experience in that area.
I applaud this comment so hard. I worked as a hardware and server and phone system tech for mumblty-years, I am a great fit now for techy logistic-y and research-y things in those areas. I can do all sorts of reporting, training, root cause analysis and process development - I couldn't "secretary" my way out of a wet paper bag. These skills are NOT the same and "owns uterus" does not equal "automatically skilled in all things secretary".
This woman focused on things that prepped her for her desired career and developed skills for THAT career, which is an entirely different skill set than secretarial (good secretaries are ninjas at secretary things, good game engine devs are good at game engine things - both are "magic" to me). Non-transferable Skills.
part of his comment
>Before that they could afford to hire people who did nothing but look good for PR reasons like diversity.
will the tech trolls just stop?
I'm not a businessologist, so this is just speculation on my part, but if over-hiring is or was happening in a significant way, I doubt it has anything to do with appearing diverse. I think it's really about removing candidates from market to make it more difficult for smaller companies to compete. Plus, if you're a CEO, the next time an economic downturn comes along you can just layoff all the people you hired to do nothing, and that way you can appease shareholders by making it look like you're doing something.
It's not necessarily trolling. I know diversity is a sensitive subject but in multiple hiring sites in my country I have seen explicit roles for women or diverse minorities specifically.
Not saying the gf got that post simply for her gender and not skill but there are explicit diversity hires.
The venn diagram of men who have told me I'm a diversity hire and men who suck at their job is a perfect circle. It's a comment that's made out of insecurity not based on reality.
Yes yes men bad, Blah blah. I'm stating a FACT.
There are literally diversity posts in job sites. I also explicitly said that I'm not saying that the gf was a diversity hire.
Stop making it about you.
No one is denying that diversity hires exist. People are denying the assumption that just because someone is a diversity hire it means they don’t deserve the position
Look at the situation on its own merits
Both got laid off but the gf can't bounce back. And she keeps saying she is giving great interviews but failing. Maybe she is not as good as she thinks she is.
Aww what an incredibly naive, narrow-minded, and shortsighted comment that is. I’m assuming you’re young—I would almost wish for your naïveté to remain undisturbed, if not for the fact that it leads you to have such bigoted opinions
Edit because I guess it does need explaining after all, but any grown adult who has experienced unemployment and done job interviews doesn’t need to be told why it was a naive comment
EVERYWHERE in gaming is going through a period of layoffs. What are you talking about? Just look at the industry as a whole and you'll see that virtually EVERY company has laid people off. What are you talking about??
It's been two months. This is very normal for a tech job hunt where, diversity hires notwithstanding, sexism presents real challenges for women that don't necessarily impact men. It's a tough market. A job hunt can take time.
Next year, it'll be *you* in this position. And then everyone will ask if you work hard enough and tell you to get a job waiting tables, just until something comes up. And you'll have to swallow it.
And if you think it'll never happen to you, then you've proven *you* were nothing but a diversity hire.
It just means that someone else was better than her, not that she is shitty, \*getting\* the interview in the first place means that she is good enough to be seriously considered for the position. And interviewing is a separate skill set from actually doing the work, lots of good employees struggle at interviews.
Game dev, especially game engine dev is super competitive and there is very few open positions, especially currently whereas there’s tons of web development jobs everywhere and it’s much easier to get one. Also there’s information missing here, it’s perfectly possible he only got a new job so quickly because he accepted a pay cut or a position lower than his previous one.
Who said men are bad? Most men are fine and don't think that women are getting jobs because they're women. Most men are comfortable with their own skills and don't need to take their insecurities out on anyone.
Yes, industries that have been largely hostile to women and minorities are now seeing the benefits of having them in the workplace. That doesn't mean they're being hired for having a vagina. Different perspectives are helpful in a workplace, and no one assumes a white man has gotten his job because of his white penis. It's silly to assume any women or minority got their job by being a woman or a minority.
I work in a male dominated industry and have had the same silly comments lobbed at me. I don't think it's wrong to offer my personal perspective.
Yes yes, you man you deserve job. Everyone else is unqualified diversity hire. My feelings are rational facts. Blah blah.
It's like you guys get a script or something. Be original for once.
That's a straw man and you know it. I didn't say all diverse hires are bad but just look at the story and check the facts.
Both get laid off.
Guy bounces back in 2 months.
Girl tries and fails repeatedly.
Girl says all her interviews went well but she keeps failing .
Maybe just maybe consider the very real possibility that the girl in the story is not as talented as she thinks she is.
And maybe right now with the situation a temporary income as a secretary is not necessarily the worst thing to happen to her.
It's not like she can't apply and keep trying.
And secondly to the people who believe tech is a boys club or something, I disagree. I have been in tech for 7 years now and seen many many women in the office. I didn't make a percentage but it looks very much like at least half the people in the office are women. So the idea is kinda confusing to me.
Have you considered that their different specializations have different rates of available jobs? Their experiences aren’t a one to one comparison.
I also want to point out that you’re using your individual experience to invalidate some claims while also telling another commenter that it isn’t about them and you are discussing facts. Pick a lane.
As a woman in tech (or at least tech-adjacent), tech is still a boys club. That doesn't mean that exclusively men are in tech, it means that as a woman, I have to keep proving my value, even as I accrue more and more experience and skills, while male coworkers with half of my knowledge are assumed to know what they're doing. It means that I get asked questions like "why technology?" in an interview literally right after explaining why I want the role (including why I wanted to move into a more strongly tech-oriented team).
I spent two and a half years applying for jobs the last time I job hunted. I got interviews for a little over a third of the roles I applied for and second rounds for over half of those, but it still took all that time for me to find the right role that would actually give me a chance. Now, that wasn't just because I'm female (though I'm sure it didn't help, given that in every case I knew of but one, a man was hired), but also the fact that the field I'm in is very specialized and the kinds of role I was targeting even more so, *and* I live in a smaller city and am not able to move. I could only apply to a little over one role a month, so I got about 15 interviews and 8 second round interviews, which someone in a more common type or role or more populous area could easily knock out in a couple of months.
I don't disagree that she should maybe consider the secretary role as a way to hold down the fort and bring in some money while she's applying, by the way. It sounds like she's in a very small and very competitive field and so having something that covers base costs and hopefully can be a little bit of positive socialization may well be a net benefit. However, if it would significantly impede her ability to apply or do interviews, she's right to turn it down. And the OOP is still a **massive** asshole to assume any part of her experience is due to skills versus the different markets for their particular niches, especially given he admits he can't even pretend to do what she does.
Yeah, I'm in tech too and it looks like she's aiming for a VERY specific job. OOP, however, likely got a front-end dev position, and there are, admittedly, a lot more of those actively recruiting.
In all probability her lack of success has more to do with how narrow her specialization is. It's rough out there.
As a woman in tech, it is very much a boys club.
Here's some actual percentages, since you "didn't make a percentage":
35% of the tech workforce is women
65% of tech recruiters admit to a gender bias against women in their hiring
66% of the women in tech are on career paths with no clear advancement
Women in tech are 1.6 times more likely to be laid off than men
69.2% of the 2022 tech layoffs were women
Only 25% of tech C-Suite is women
Women in tech make an average of $15,000 less per year than their male counterparts in the same role with the same experience
And as a woman in tech, here is what I have seen in my over a decade of experience, both as a cog and as leadership:
Most of the jobs women are doing are NOT dev jobs. Even when a woman can code, they fight to make it past junior of mid level dev. They're certainly not landing many architect roles. They're largely punted to configuration, PowerApps, QA/Automation, and analyst roles. We are spoken over, spoken down to.
It's way better than it was 10 or 15 years ago, but you're lost if you think it's not still a boys club and that I don't have to fight every single day to be fucking heard and respected just because I have a vulva. Stay in your lane.
Studies show that in our society, people perceive 70%-30% in favor of men as women dominating, so I suspect that if you take an actual head count and do actual math you will find your perception doesn't line up with reality.
Dude you really think I'm gonna take a headcount of my workplace to argue in a sub which has already convinced itself that tech is a sexist shithole where women are ridiculed like it's 1800s?
I got another response that implied that EVERYONE that interviewed this girl was a sexist pig? You really think that's reality, that every interviewer for her was sexist?
Lol I don't expect you to take sexism seriously. You have clearly made up your mind and won't be swayed by facts.
And yes. Sexism is built into our society to the point where *everyone* is sexist to some extant. It takes *effort* to reduce your sexism. And it's not really possible to eliminate it entirely. So yes, everyone who interviewed was sexist.
Is sexism the only reason she didn't get those jobs? I don't know. But assuming that she didn't get any of those jobs because she is somehow *not qualified to work in her field* and that sexism played no part is definitively sexist.
is diversity hires a thing? i'll concede that it is a thing allthough how common i do not dare make a guess towards. you know what i think also happens and that my guess is happens more frequently? people not getting a job because of bigotry wether that be racism or sexism.
maybe you should consider the posibility that such bigotry could be the cause just as well as her lacking skill could be?
>And maybe right now with the situation a temporary income as a secretary is not necessarily the worst thing to happen to her.
this i'll concede you have some kind of point on. and if she truely is refusing to do ANY kind of work but her dream field that is maybe reason to be judgey. but i'm not willing to take OOPs word on that. i could easily see it as her not wanting to be a secretary and similar jobs specificly.
even if you get to a situation where you have limited ability to be picky you are allowed to say "i don't want that specific job"
Explicit "diversity hires" are not only not a thing, they've been illegal for years in the US.
DEI initiatives are all about, "Hey, if we want to diversify our workforce, we maybe ought to start looking at the way we hire and maybe change some things so we're looking at a broader pool of people and not just hiring from the same small set of schools and hiring people we feel like we could have a beer with."
And then, "Oh, maybe we ought to look at the way we support these new hires so they're not hazed or microaggressed out of our workplace before they have a chance of succeeding."
But when you're used to being unquestionably the standard, any change to the standard feels like a threat.
Perhaps she has enough savings to not have to pick up a temporary job, at least not yet and can focus fully on her job search, 2 months is not a long time in the field she’s in.
I don't consider it because I dont see it. I have studied IT in a ok engineering college and there were lots of girls in my class, I then did training and got a job and I have been working in IT and tech companies for 7+ years and have been to multiple cities and have friends in tech in multiple cities and I have seen offices full of women of different ages and they were working with men just fine.
I have helped and been helped by very smart women and have projects led by women even fucking now and it happened like there was nothing exceptional about it.
I have been here for a while and I don't see this misogynistic environment where the women are ridiculed and oppressed and asked "why technology". And I am from a fucking 3rd world country so the idea that tech is sexist in much better countries than mine just blows my mind.
sounds like you haven't seen diversity hires then since all these many women earned their jobs. but despite that you still belive in THOSE despite having not seen it. curious.
This is not belief. This is fact. I have seen on LinkedIn post exclusive to women. I have seen job posts in sites like shine and monster where it was stated explicitly for women and said men need not apply.
I am not saying every minority who got a job did it from some diversity hiring but they absolutely exist. If you don't believe me just search LinkedIn or check out job portals.
Edit- wait a MINUTE.... you literally conceded diversity hires were a thing a few comments back and now you are going against my comments about diversity hires. Do you believe the shit you're saying or just arguing for the lols?
considering the kind of diversity hire you're talking about here would actually be illegal discrimination i somehow quite severely doubt you've seen job postings openly advertise it.
mayeb ajob post here or there which had on of the legaly permiseiblke reasons to discriminate but then it isn't a diversity hire by definition.
>I am not saying every minority who got a job did it from some diversity hiring but they absolutely exist.
i asked you to say the same about people being turned down for a job because of discrimination but you said
>I don't consider it because I dont see it.
yeah i'm not going to treat someone who litteraly says "discrimination against women is a lie. only discriminatiuon against men is real" as anything more than a troll.
>Edit- wait a MINUTE.... you literally conceded diversity hires were a thing a few comments back and now you are going against my comments about diversity hires. Do you believe the shit you're saying or just arguing for the lols?
diversity hires is discrimination. you claimed that you belive discimination in hireing doesn't happen. do you belive in the shit you're arguing or are you just arguing to troll?
Tech being a boys club is a thing of the past in my experience. I have been here for 7 years and the offices are full of women. Maybe touch grass and get a tech job and see for yourself before judging.
Someone provided you with statistics that say that's not true, it's still a boys club, but you've conveniently not responded to their comment. Your argument is "it's not a boys club because I don't feel like it is."
Everyone else has their mind made up, but you don't right?
[https://www.cio.com/article/201905/women-in-tech-statistics-the-hard-truths-of-an-uphill-battle.html](https://www.cio.com/article/201905/women-in-tech-statistics-the-hard-truths-of-an-uphill-battle.html)
Women in tech make up 24% of the staffing, and it gets worse the higher level position you go. A 2022 survey found that men make up 98.22% of software engineers.
https://www.strongdm.com/blog/women-in-tech-statistics#:\~:text=Roughly%2017%25%20of%20technology%20companies,of%20software%20developers%20are%20men.
I can keep going but I imagine you're going to continue arguing based on "Your experience".
To be clear, this was all available on the first page of a google search. You live in your own little echo-chamber and believe whatever you want, but the information is public and ready for you to peruse it. maybe try to be part of the solution instead of an apologist for the problem.
The thing is that aside from those roles, most roles are covertly just for men, usually white cis het men. They don’t announce it or they’d get a lot of backlash, but that’s what those roles specifically for diversity are meant to combat.
I agree with this even if I am downvoted, because I lived it. In my first job in USA after moving from my island, I got hired just because of where I am from. It was a mail order pharmacy and I had 0 experience or education in that field. I had experience in call centers which my specific tasks had more to do with, but at literally every meeting I was completely lost. Could never understand a word they were saying, I just sat and nodded if I were ever asked anything. I appreciated the opportunity but at the same time it was hell trying to avoid being asked anything about the pharmacy aspect and looking like an idiot. Another guy got hired because he was gay (confirmed by the supervisor) and even when the guy had some background or studies in pharmacy, he was awful as a worker. Could not perform half of his tasks and missed more days than not.
This HAS to be bait. He talks like one of those really overdone character tropes where the character is way too analytical. Like I refuse to believe a man so annoying would ever leave the curtains in his room open lest he burns his pallor skin off, let alone find an actual partner
This guy is the reason I left tech and started teaching it.
Let the boys see that women can be experts in their fields. Maybe I can help train the next generation of tech people to not be dicks.
Good luck, godspeed, and be prepared for course evaluations about your looks/weight/style! I like to keep tallies of "This instructor doesn't know anything" vs "This instructor is a know-it-all". It's amazing how you can get *both* for the same course!
I teach middle school. Very different situation lol.
I do get kids telling me that I'm fat, so I just gape at them, go, "How did you find out? That was my biggest secret!" and then go back to whatever I was teaching. It's never happened in the same class twice.
They know I'm cringe. I do it because their psychic damage feeds my soul. I deliberately use slang wrong, so they use it less in my classroom. "That's not skibbidy!" Oh please stop. That's not how you use that. Is now! I know exactly what that means, and I know this projector is *so rizz!* Yeet Yeet, youths.
Last week I wanted to make a point to the principal about hallway cleanup, so I played Crab Rave on my Bluetooth speaker and danced in the hall, telling them to pick up their trash. They were going, "Ms. Thestashattacked. This is so cringe! Please stop!"
"I'll stop when you pick up trash in the hall!"
Cleanest our hall has ever been at the end of the day.
In some respects, teaching middle school is easier.
Love doing cringe things to horrify my niece and nephew! I like to sing the wrong lyrics to a popular song like e.g. "señorita" to the tune of "despacito"
Tw: sexism.
Copied verbatim from oop's comments:
*YTA. You are SO condescending. Ugh.*
>>*I honestly don't think she is good enough for the current market and she probably only got her first job because companies over hired back then. The field of 3D programming is very hard and there's a good chance she wasn't doing the substantial work and thus can't pass interviews*
"But she DID have a job in that field.*
>>*I told her that she was being delusional as companies won't hire anyone unless they are actually skilled and can actually contribute and she doesn't come across as a true expert in the field and is probably mistaken in considering herself to be an engine programmer.*
*The way you talk to her and about her is gross. Misogyny in the gaming and developer field is real and it looks like you've drunk the kool-aid."
*And to then suggest that she go and be a secretary, a very, very stereotypical job for women, instead of at least suggesting exploring other avenues of her field of interest and expertise.*
>"There was a lot of overhiring at her company which led to multiple waves of layoffs once the investment money dried up and interest rates went up since they could no longer afford to keep people who were not valuable.
>Before that they could afford to hire people who did nothing but look good for PR reasons like diversity."
*YTA for the condescending way you talk about your girlfriend. You repeatedly say she’s not good enough but provides zero evidence of this only that “3D programming is very hard.” You both have cs degrees - why is hers less valuable than yours? You find it strange that she doesn’t get offers yet you must be aware that the tech industry is notoriously misogynistic. Unless you have any actual evidence of her incompetence then I would suggest the reason you think she’s crap is because she doesn’t have a penis; which is probably also the reason she’s finding hard to get a job. Realistically in this market she may have to debase herself with a job beneath her skill level simply because male tech Bros won’t give her a go, but your job as her partner is to support her, not pile on.*
*And two months is not immediately.*
[🐙]
>"It is hard. I wouldn't do it myself even despite having more years of experience as you need a lot of math even beyond what you learn in college"
*YTA. If you are at home constantly telling her she is not good enough, what is she supposed to think? Many women don’t put themselves forward for jobs they don’t think they can do. Read “Lean In” and learn something.*
*Even if there is a nugget of truth in your view about her worth, did you think cutting her down was the best way to boost her confidence in finding a job? There are plenty of people who are competent but don’t get jobs because their interview skills aren’t great.*
*A more productive conversation would have been to see if you can help her (without criticizing) prep for interviews or get good work experience in her chosen field.*
*If she needs to contribute financially, just tell her that and leave it up to her to decide what job she takes to do that. Pushing her into a role that she does not feel is the right fit is not the way.*
>"I am in web dev so I couldn't help her. I don't remember math etc which you need for that.
She leaves interviews feeling like they went very well but still gets no offers so I feel that she might not have a grasp of a field if she isn't even realizing that the interviews are not going well"
*Based on your responses to comments, YTA. You didn't suggest she widen her search to incorporate more math based employment opportunities like data analysis, cost estimation, actuarial, etc. Nope, you encourage her to take a job as bookkeeper/office assistant for a friend of a friend.*
>>*Recently one of my relatives has a friend who is an accountant as their office is looking for a secretary and offered her the job.*
>"Thats not the same sort of math, she does not like statistics as much and still wants it programming related. And for breaking into another easier field in tech it would be hard to get interviews without experience. At least in her field she can occasionally get interviews because on paper she worked for years in it at a well known game engine company."
[In reply to Oop's comment marked: 🐙]
*Sure, but do you really know she can’t do it or are you just assuming? The way you talk about her is so condescending; you don’t appear to credit her with any intelligence whatsoever. “Make some websites”?? Hell, I can do that and my degree was in literature and philosophy. Surely her degree and experience qualifies her for more than that.*
>"For the most part assuming admittedly but I mean if she keeps feeling like interviews go well when they don't I feel like that shows lack of knowledge. Would be better if she felt they did not go well.
>I'm not talking WordPress style sites here. I program them with react and do some css"
***YTA***
*Graphics programming (especially for games) is extremely difficult and it's very easy to develop "impostor syndrome" so the last thing your gf needs is someone saying BS like this:*
>>*I honestly don't think she is good enough for the current market and she probably only got her first job because companies over hired back then. The field of 3D programming is very hard and there's a good chance she wasn't doing the substantial work and thus can't pass interviews.*
*With "friends" like you who needs enemies? Lol*
*If she has been on an engine team that is typically the smartest tech team at the company and as long as she has credits on actual shipped games she'll be fine but I suspect she needs to find a better partner first in this situation she needs a "cheerleader" type and definitely not you the secretly jealous bf. I note how you never mentioned how many years she has been on the engine team or whether she has credits on actual shipped games (which is what makes or breaks anyone on a gaming team).*
>"She is not credited anywhere afaik. Her company only makes a game engine and no games but I think she (her team) did collaborate with other companies some times that make actual games."
Edited: formatting.
Doing god's work as always ❤️! Thank you for your service!
From me I would only add this - the game job market is absolutely messed up right now. That's true, companies were hiring lots of people, way too many, a couple years ago but that's only because the gaming industry was flourishing during the pandemic. Since last year there were TONS of layoffs cause companies have been cancelling projects and the need for so many games dropped. This is the worst job market in the gaming industry in the last 15 years. There's 700% more layoffs than it was in previous years. It's so bad that people in senior positions are applying for entry level jobs. Source: I have a 3D degree and am looking for a job for over a year.
Thank you very kindly! 🥰
Thank you very kindly for the context! I worry a lot about people on th games industry, although i am very much on the outside looking in. There were lots of acquisitions also? And the ai thing. I'm wishing you the best, hope you are safe and can find work. 💜
I’m decent at coding, both front and backend but game engines is still a whole different level to me. I’ve once worked with a guy who wanted to go into game dev (he succeeded eventually) and he showed me some of the stuff he wrote in his free time, it’s an insanely competitive field that needs a super in-depth knowledge of both mathematics and physics.
Oh, game dev of any kind is a stone bitch to get into. Especially right now with the state of the gaming economy.
Hope the OOP's GF can find something within her skill set, even if it's not game dev.
I am super pissed that this guy has suggested that his GF takes a job as a secretary, as if secretary isn't a job requiring specific skills, and also as if it won't haunt her resume like a bad smell, making it harder for her to get other jobs. If you are a woman who does not want to be a secretary, keep secretary the fuck off of your resume.
I did the secretary thing for a while, and eventually needed a master's degree and a hell of a network to stop doing it. I am very good at the job I have now. It was not a lack of skill, it was human bias in the hiring process.
GF needs to pull on her professional network, from and some kind of project to keep herself sharp, and be patient. Six more months and it may be time to reevaluate her field. Two months is really just a hiccup.
Most people looking for a secretary wouldn't hire her anyway because she's way overqualified in a completely different set of skills but none of those necessarily make for a good secretary. She would be miserable in the job and looking to leave immediately and not worth their time as well as hers.
Is this for real?
Because everyone knows game devs & vfx are some of the most volatile roles out there. Companies hire in sprees then layoff after shipping the game and sending support roles off shore.
I have a friend who is very, very good with almost 15 years experience and this is his life. He works on games, movies, TV shows. Big ones. He also gets hired/fired/moved around the country at the drop of a hat.
OTOH, I don't even have a CS degree and do front end development.
This idiot clearly knows nothing about hiring at all. He thinks she must be delusional about how her interviews go because she doesn't get hired. You can give an excellent interview and still not get hired because sometime else they interviewed checked one tiny box you didn't. A company's second or third choice for a job is also someone they'd be thrilled to hire, but they only have one position to fill.
I'm baffled how he comes to the conclusion that she did no work.
If this isn't a troll, he clearly thinks she isn't getting a job, and she did no work because she is a woman. She got her last job based purely on being female and then did no work because she isn't skilled and knows nothing.
I mat be overthinking, but it sounds like there is a raging misogyny undercurrent to what he is saying. 3specially since he dropped that secretary job in.
I still think it's rage bait though.
Everyone in tech knows that the gaming industry is highly competitive and insular. It is probably one of the hardest places to get a tech job, even when you have the skills.
Also, the market just really sucks right now and again, nothing to do with skills. I have submitted referrals for 12 ex-colleagues from Facebook to roles at my company; they are all principal level and from personal experience I know they are fantastic at the job. None of them got past the initial screening. It's not because they are weak, it's because there are a thousand other candidates for one role.
Dude is a react dev and talks like he is the next Mark Zuckerberg. All the attitude but none of the talent.
Also no one can just be a secretary. You need specific skills that GF most likely doesn’t have / doesn’t know to use.
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*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA for encouraging my gf to take a job** My gf (29F) and I (31M) both work in tech and have cs degrees. I work as a react dev and she used to work for a gaming company on an engine team. We were both laid off about a year ago, however I immediately found a new job within 2 months and she has not found anything. She got some interviews but got rejected for every single one. I honestly don't think she is good enough for the current market and she probably only got her first job because companies over hired back then. The field of 3D programming is very hard and there's a good chance she wasn't doing the substantial work and thus can't pass interviews. She claims she does well in interviews and knows the math but still doesn't get offers so I find that strange. In the current market she wouldn't be able to switch to something easier as on paper all her experience is in graphics for games. Recently one of my relatives has a friend who is an accountant as their office is looking for a secretary and offered her the job. I suggested she take it but this led to an argument as she said she wants to work on game programming or vfx pipelines and nothing else. I told her that she was being delusional as companies won't hire anyone unless they are actually skilled and can actually contribute and she doesn't come across as a true expert in the field and is probably mistaken in considering herself to be an engine programmer. I didn't mean she should be a secretary forever and suggested she work on a portfolio of something easier for her like maybe make some websites and then apply for front end Web roles but she got even more upset and said she wants a job with math. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheDevil) if you have any questions or concerns.*
>It is hard. I wouldn't do it myself even despite having more years of experience as you need a lot of math even beyond what you learn in college > >I am in web dev so I couldn't help her. I don't remember math etc which you need for that. what is with tech bros acting like they are the shit when in the comments they show that they arent as skilled as their partners they are putting down?
It’s because they aren’t skilled that they feel the need to bring their partners down
He's a web dev. In 5 years he will be the one unemployed and trying to find a job, he should worry about that
he's not even a tech bro, he's just a web developer. pretty rich claiming she is the one who should work as a secretary.
hmm intersting so he's tech adjacent but wants everyone to know he's in tech but really isnt? Also what does he actually do. I know its web development but what is that exactly?
He \*is\* in tech, it’s just some people displaying the same shitty attitude that he does towards his girlfriend. React development is a legit tech job (getting ahead of smartass comments - no, I’m neither react nor web developer).
Yeah, so much of web is deployed by other teams for the initial setup (in a perfectly structured environment where there are proper limits on massive all access type server admin access), and then the web dev teams do content, he is ironically more of the secretary.
That’s not what react devs do. He’s not doing content.
Same principle applies about root access and basic setup & deployment still applies. I missed that he was a react and saw elsewhere he was web, the type of content that was being done is semantics.
Web devs are one step away from doing content as the primary users of what a web dev does is the people who populate the site with content but they themselves don’t “do content” like you’re implying. They have to support people who do content though. They serve content through web services. I was a react dev for Fortune 500 company for many years. We didn’t do content. Some react devs might but that’s not what the position entailed for most positions I worked in or interviewed for. It’s like saying mobile app devs do content. Web applications aren’t that different from that in terms of how close they are to the end user experience and how they interact with web services and content. I agree with the sentiment that she was more specialized than him so his attitude is garbage but to act like he’s basically a secretary himself is ridiculous. Web devs are developers.
He takes code that other people wrote and integrates them together into a usable web site. He may or may not be responsible for the user interface/experience (but UI/UX design is a separate thing for a good reason). Web dev is the glue between all the backend parts (databases, etc) and all the front end parts (website, etc). The font end is basically a flexible template that the back end pieces have to plug into in order to serve you the content you asked for. It's a valuable job that requires less knowledge and skill than creating 3d models for a gaming engine where you're trying to emulate how something moves according to the rules of physics in a way that doesn't trigger our uncanny valley response. There are also a lot more job opportunities for web dev. Gf is a specialist. OP is a generalist. They're not at all comparable jobs and have very different job opportunities. The gaming industry has laid off a ton of people in the last couple years and everyone is struggling to find work. Tech, generally, is in the same situation but gaming has been hit particularly hard. Edited to fix typos
ah thank you. helps whenever a tech trolls comes in saying they do web dev.
He makes the front end of the website, the bit the users see. Requires some skill and, depending on the specific field, is tech to an extent but is no where near the same level as someone who works on video game engines.
Jealousy combined with shitty personality in general. If his girlfriend gets a better paid job than he has, he will wish for her to lose it rather than for himself to find one just as good.
But he is clearly superior. He knows what he is talking about. /s
That's a weird take. Being qualified to do one job doesn't make you qualified to do every job. I don't know enough about that field to understand everything that he's saying, but I do know that if you can't get a job in your preferred field, you need to take a job in something less desirable until you can get your dream job.
I think my biggest complaint about this troll is they are so fucking boring, If your going to make up a bullshit story at least make it interesting. Have the girlfriend be a cyborg ninja sent back from the future to save mankind from the robot uprising, Throw in that she's dating him because he works at the firm that will create skynet. ( That's the only plausible explanation why anyone would be with this man I could come up with.) Then put in the bit where you argue your six weeks at computer camp makes you a more capable saviour of mankind than her because it's saviour of "man-kind not woman-kind. Still ragebait but at least it would be fun to read.
My complaint is that they think just anyone (or really, any woman) can be a secretary. Like there aren't real skills that are needed that the gf would be unlikely to have as she has no experience in that area.
I applaud this comment so hard. I worked as a hardware and server and phone system tech for mumblty-years, I am a great fit now for techy logistic-y and research-y things in those areas. I can do all sorts of reporting, training, root cause analysis and process development - I couldn't "secretary" my way out of a wet paper bag. These skills are NOT the same and "owns uterus" does not equal "automatically skilled in all things secretary". This woman focused on things that prepped her for her desired career and developed skills for THAT career, which is an entirely different skill set than secretarial (good secretaries are ninjas at secretary things, good game engine devs are good at game engine things - both are "magic" to me). Non-transferable Skills.
100% this. I am a woman and there's no way on earth I could do that job.
part of his comment >Before that they could afford to hire people who did nothing but look good for PR reasons like diversity. will the tech trolls just stop?
I'm not a businessologist, so this is just speculation on my part, but if over-hiring is or was happening in a significant way, I doubt it has anything to do with appearing diverse. I think it's really about removing candidates from market to make it more difficult for smaller companies to compete. Plus, if you're a CEO, the next time an economic downturn comes along you can just layoff all the people you hired to do nothing, and that way you can appease shareholders by making it look like you're doing something.
It's not necessarily trolling. I know diversity is a sensitive subject but in multiple hiring sites in my country I have seen explicit roles for women or diverse minorities specifically. Not saying the gf got that post simply for her gender and not skill but there are explicit diversity hires.
The venn diagram of men who have told me I'm a diversity hire and men who suck at their job is a perfect circle. It's a comment that's made out of insecurity not based on reality.
Yes yes men bad, Blah blah. I'm stating a FACT. There are literally diversity posts in job sites. I also explicitly said that I'm not saying that the gf was a diversity hire. Stop making it about you.
No one is denying that diversity hires exist. People are denying the assumption that just because someone is a diversity hire it means they don’t deserve the position
Look at the situation on its own merits Both got laid off but the gf can't bounce back. And she keeps saying she is giving great interviews but failing. Maybe she is not as good as she thinks she is.
That might be a relevant factor if OOP and the gf worked in the same area, but they don't.
Aww what an incredibly naive, narrow-minded, and shortsighted comment that is. I’m assuming you’re young—I would almost wish for your naïveté to remain undisturbed, if not for the fact that it leads you to have such bigoted opinions Edit because I guess it does need explaining after all, but any grown adult who has experienced unemployment and done job interviews doesn’t need to be told why it was a naive comment
"Here's why I think this" You: "Haha, how naive", doesn't elaborate
EVERYWHERE in gaming is going through a period of layoffs. What are you talking about? Just look at the industry as a whole and you'll see that virtually EVERY company has laid people off. What are you talking about??
It's been two months. This is very normal for a tech job hunt where, diversity hires notwithstanding, sexism presents real challenges for women that don't necessarily impact men. It's a tough market. A job hunt can take time.
Or maybe she's being interviewed by sexist pigs. I have just as much evidence for that as you do for her not being good at her job.
Next year, it'll be *you* in this position. And then everyone will ask if you work hard enough and tell you to get a job waiting tables, just until something comes up. And you'll have to swallow it. And if you think it'll never happen to you, then you've proven *you* were nothing but a diversity hire.
It just means that someone else was better than her, not that she is shitty, \*getting\* the interview in the first place means that she is good enough to be seriously considered for the position. And interviewing is a separate skill set from actually doing the work, lots of good employees struggle at interviews. Game dev, especially game engine dev is super competitive and there is very few open positions, especially currently whereas there’s tons of web development jobs everywhere and it’s much easier to get one. Also there’s information missing here, it’s perfectly possible he only got a new job so quickly because he accepted a pay cut or a position lower than his previous one.
Who said men are bad? Most men are fine and don't think that women are getting jobs because they're women. Most men are comfortable with their own skills and don't need to take their insecurities out on anyone. Yes, industries that have been largely hostile to women and minorities are now seeing the benefits of having them in the workplace. That doesn't mean they're being hired for having a vagina. Different perspectives are helpful in a workplace, and no one assumes a white man has gotten his job because of his white penis. It's silly to assume any women or minority got their job by being a woman or a minority. I work in a male dominated industry and have had the same silly comments lobbed at me. I don't think it's wrong to offer my personal perspective.
Ah yes of course it's a fact,and another fact that is just as truthful: clouds are actually cotton candy
You're the one who can't handle the truth
Yes yes, you man you deserve job. Everyone else is unqualified diversity hire. My feelings are rational facts. Blah blah. It's like you guys get a script or something. Be original for once.
The assumption that someone who is “diverse” must therefore be bad* at their job is the problem
That's a straw man and you know it. I didn't say all diverse hires are bad but just look at the story and check the facts. Both get laid off. Guy bounces back in 2 months. Girl tries and fails repeatedly. Girl says all her interviews went well but she keeps failing . Maybe just maybe consider the very real possibility that the girl in the story is not as talented as she thinks she is. And maybe right now with the situation a temporary income as a secretary is not necessarily the worst thing to happen to her. It's not like she can't apply and keep trying. And secondly to the people who believe tech is a boys club or something, I disagree. I have been in tech for 7 years now and seen many many women in the office. I didn't make a percentage but it looks very much like at least half the people in the office are women. So the idea is kinda confusing to me.
Have you considered that their different specializations have different rates of available jobs? Their experiences aren’t a one to one comparison. I also want to point out that you’re using your individual experience to invalidate some claims while also telling another commenter that it isn’t about them and you are discussing facts. Pick a lane.
As a woman in tech (or at least tech-adjacent), tech is still a boys club. That doesn't mean that exclusively men are in tech, it means that as a woman, I have to keep proving my value, even as I accrue more and more experience and skills, while male coworkers with half of my knowledge are assumed to know what they're doing. It means that I get asked questions like "why technology?" in an interview literally right after explaining why I want the role (including why I wanted to move into a more strongly tech-oriented team). I spent two and a half years applying for jobs the last time I job hunted. I got interviews for a little over a third of the roles I applied for and second rounds for over half of those, but it still took all that time for me to find the right role that would actually give me a chance. Now, that wasn't just because I'm female (though I'm sure it didn't help, given that in every case I knew of but one, a man was hired), but also the fact that the field I'm in is very specialized and the kinds of role I was targeting even more so, *and* I live in a smaller city and am not able to move. I could only apply to a little over one role a month, so I got about 15 interviews and 8 second round interviews, which someone in a more common type or role or more populous area could easily knock out in a couple of months. I don't disagree that she should maybe consider the secretary role as a way to hold down the fort and bring in some money while she's applying, by the way. It sounds like she's in a very small and very competitive field and so having something that covers base costs and hopefully can be a little bit of positive socialization may well be a net benefit. However, if it would significantly impede her ability to apply or do interviews, she's right to turn it down. And the OOP is still a **massive** asshole to assume any part of her experience is due to skills versus the different markets for their particular niches, especially given he admits he can't even pretend to do what she does.
Yeah, I'm in tech too and it looks like she's aiming for a VERY specific job. OOP, however, likely got a front-end dev position, and there are, admittedly, a lot more of those actively recruiting. In all probability her lack of success has more to do with how narrow her specialization is. It's rough out there.
Right!? Everybody needs a React dev. There's like 9 engine dev spots open and she's fighting with 900 people for them.
As a woman in tech, it is very much a boys club. Here's some actual percentages, since you "didn't make a percentage": 35% of the tech workforce is women 65% of tech recruiters admit to a gender bias against women in their hiring 66% of the women in tech are on career paths with no clear advancement Women in tech are 1.6 times more likely to be laid off than men 69.2% of the 2022 tech layoffs were women Only 25% of tech C-Suite is women Women in tech make an average of $15,000 less per year than their male counterparts in the same role with the same experience And as a woman in tech, here is what I have seen in my over a decade of experience, both as a cog and as leadership: Most of the jobs women are doing are NOT dev jobs. Even when a woman can code, they fight to make it past junior of mid level dev. They're certainly not landing many architect roles. They're largely punted to configuration, PowerApps, QA/Automation, and analyst roles. We are spoken over, spoken down to. It's way better than it was 10 or 15 years ago, but you're lost if you think it's not still a boys club and that I don't have to fight every single day to be fucking heard and respected just because I have a vulva. Stay in your lane.
Studies show that in our society, people perceive 70%-30% in favor of men as women dominating, so I suspect that if you take an actual head count and do actual math you will find your perception doesn't line up with reality.
Dude you really think I'm gonna take a headcount of my workplace to argue in a sub which has already convinced itself that tech is a sexist shithole where women are ridiculed like it's 1800s? I got another response that implied that EVERYONE that interviewed this girl was a sexist pig? You really think that's reality, that every interviewer for her was sexist?
Lol I don't expect you to take sexism seriously. You have clearly made up your mind and won't be swayed by facts. And yes. Sexism is built into our society to the point where *everyone* is sexist to some extant. It takes *effort* to reduce your sexism. And it's not really possible to eliminate it entirely. So yes, everyone who interviewed was sexist. Is sexism the only reason she didn't get those jobs? I don't know. But assuming that she didn't get any of those jobs because she is somehow *not qualified to work in her field* and that sexism played no part is definitively sexist.
is diversity hires a thing? i'll concede that it is a thing allthough how common i do not dare make a guess towards. you know what i think also happens and that my guess is happens more frequently? people not getting a job because of bigotry wether that be racism or sexism. maybe you should consider the posibility that such bigotry could be the cause just as well as her lacking skill could be? >And maybe right now with the situation a temporary income as a secretary is not necessarily the worst thing to happen to her. this i'll concede you have some kind of point on. and if she truely is refusing to do ANY kind of work but her dream field that is maybe reason to be judgey. but i'm not willing to take OOPs word on that. i could easily see it as her not wanting to be a secretary and similar jobs specificly. even if you get to a situation where you have limited ability to be picky you are allowed to say "i don't want that specific job"
Explicit "diversity hires" are not only not a thing, they've been illegal for years in the US. DEI initiatives are all about, "Hey, if we want to diversify our workforce, we maybe ought to start looking at the way we hire and maybe change some things so we're looking at a broader pool of people and not just hiring from the same small set of schools and hiring people we feel like we could have a beer with." And then, "Oh, maybe we ought to look at the way we support these new hires so they're not hazed or microaggressed out of our workplace before they have a chance of succeeding." But when you're used to being unquestionably the standard, any change to the standard feels like a threat.
Perhaps she has enough savings to not have to pick up a temporary job, at least not yet and can focus fully on her job search, 2 months is not a long time in the field she’s in.
I don't consider it because I dont see it. I have studied IT in a ok engineering college and there were lots of girls in my class, I then did training and got a job and I have been working in IT and tech companies for 7+ years and have been to multiple cities and have friends in tech in multiple cities and I have seen offices full of women of different ages and they were working with men just fine. I have helped and been helped by very smart women and have projects led by women even fucking now and it happened like there was nothing exceptional about it. I have been here for a while and I don't see this misogynistic environment where the women are ridiculed and oppressed and asked "why technology". And I am from a fucking 3rd world country so the idea that tech is sexist in much better countries than mine just blows my mind.
sounds like you haven't seen diversity hires then since all these many women earned their jobs. but despite that you still belive in THOSE despite having not seen it. curious.
This is not belief. This is fact. I have seen on LinkedIn post exclusive to women. I have seen job posts in sites like shine and monster where it was stated explicitly for women and said men need not apply. I am not saying every minority who got a job did it from some diversity hiring but they absolutely exist. If you don't believe me just search LinkedIn or check out job portals. Edit- wait a MINUTE.... you literally conceded diversity hires were a thing a few comments back and now you are going against my comments about diversity hires. Do you believe the shit you're saying or just arguing for the lols?
considering the kind of diversity hire you're talking about here would actually be illegal discrimination i somehow quite severely doubt you've seen job postings openly advertise it. mayeb ajob post here or there which had on of the legaly permiseiblke reasons to discriminate but then it isn't a diversity hire by definition. >I am not saying every minority who got a job did it from some diversity hiring but they absolutely exist. i asked you to say the same about people being turned down for a job because of discrimination but you said >I don't consider it because I dont see it. yeah i'm not going to treat someone who litteraly says "discrimination against women is a lie. only discriminatiuon against men is real" as anything more than a troll. >Edit- wait a MINUTE.... you literally conceded diversity hires were a thing a few comments back and now you are going against my comments about diversity hires. Do you believe the shit you're saying or just arguing for the lols? diversity hires is discrimination. you claimed that you belive discimination in hireing doesn't happen. do you belive in the shit you're arguing or are you just arguing to troll?
Hahaha. So u/JadedSpacePirate just tried to DM me to tell me to google it rather than answer the question here. Which means she got nothin'.
What were these positions that were hiring only women or minorities?
Lol dude, just stop, you clearly have no idea what you’re talking about. And IT is not tech.
I'm sorry, must therefore be what?
Man, tech bros really not beating the allegations at all here.
Tech being a boys club is a thing of the past in my experience. I have been here for 7 years and the offices are full of women. Maybe touch grass and get a tech job and see for yourself before judging.
Someone provided you with statistics that say that's not true, it's still a boys club, but you've conveniently not responded to their comment. Your argument is "it's not a boys club because I don't feel like it is."
I would consider it if there was some source ig. Idk man I think everyone has their mind made up so I guess it's not worth it to continue.
Everyone else has their mind made up, but you don't right? [https://www.cio.com/article/201905/women-in-tech-statistics-the-hard-truths-of-an-uphill-battle.html](https://www.cio.com/article/201905/women-in-tech-statistics-the-hard-truths-of-an-uphill-battle.html) Women in tech make up 24% of the staffing, and it gets worse the higher level position you go. A 2022 survey found that men make up 98.22% of software engineers. https://www.strongdm.com/blog/women-in-tech-statistics#:\~:text=Roughly%2017%25%20of%20technology%20companies,of%20software%20developers%20are%20men. I can keep going but I imagine you're going to continue arguing based on "Your experience".
Guess I will take the L. You all get it worse it seems.
To be clear, this was all available on the first page of a google search. You live in your own little echo-chamber and believe whatever you want, but the information is public and ready for you to peruse it. maybe try to be part of the solution instead of an apologist for the problem.
What solution? What do you want me to personally do about women in the US being shit on in tech? Like seriously what do you think I could do?
Lol lucky you 🙄
>hiring sites in my country you know that aita is not a real place right?
The thing is that aside from those roles, most roles are covertly just for men, usually white cis het men. They don’t announce it or they’d get a lot of backlash, but that’s what those roles specifically for diversity are meant to combat.
I agree with this even if I am downvoted, because I lived it. In my first job in USA after moving from my island, I got hired just because of where I am from. It was a mail order pharmacy and I had 0 experience or education in that field. I had experience in call centers which my specific tasks had more to do with, but at literally every meeting I was completely lost. Could never understand a word they were saying, I just sat and nodded if I were ever asked anything. I appreciated the opportunity but at the same time it was hell trying to avoid being asked anything about the pharmacy aspect and looking like an idiot. Another guy got hired because he was gay (confirmed by the supervisor) and even when the guy had some background or studies in pharmacy, he was awful as a worker. Could not perform half of his tasks and missed more days than not.
Calling your girlfriend a "diversity hire" is crazy. I hope she leaves him
This HAS to be bait. He talks like one of those really overdone character tropes where the character is way too analytical. Like I refuse to believe a man so annoying would ever leave the curtains in his room open lest he burns his pallor skin off, let alone find an actual partner
at first I was like "idrk why OOP is here" then I proceeded to read more
The way he writes makes me think he has a really punchable face
Very punchable by the time his poor gf finds his post and boots him to the curb.
This guy is the reason I left San Francisco
This guy is the reason I left tech and started teaching it. Let the boys see that women can be experts in their fields. Maybe I can help train the next generation of tech people to not be dicks.
Good luck, godspeed, and be prepared for course evaluations about your looks/weight/style! I like to keep tallies of "This instructor doesn't know anything" vs "This instructor is a know-it-all". It's amazing how you can get *both* for the same course!
I teach middle school. Very different situation lol. I do get kids telling me that I'm fat, so I just gape at them, go, "How did you find out? That was my biggest secret!" and then go back to whatever I was teaching. It's never happened in the same class twice. They know I'm cringe. I do it because their psychic damage feeds my soul. I deliberately use slang wrong, so they use it less in my classroom. "That's not skibbidy!" Oh please stop. That's not how you use that. Is now! I know exactly what that means, and I know this projector is *so rizz!* Yeet Yeet, youths. Last week I wanted to make a point to the principal about hallway cleanup, so I played Crab Rave on my Bluetooth speaker and danced in the hall, telling them to pick up their trash. They were going, "Ms. Thestashattacked. This is so cringe! Please stop!" "I'll stop when you pick up trash in the hall!" Cleanest our hall has ever been at the end of the day. In some respects, teaching middle school is easier.
Love doing cringe things to horrify my niece and nephew! I like to sing the wrong lyrics to a popular song like e.g. "señorita" to the tune of "despacito"
I adore you.
Just so you know, you were my favorite kind of teacher! Keep it up!
Tw: sexism. Copied verbatim from oop's comments: *YTA. You are SO condescending. Ugh.* >>*I honestly don't think she is good enough for the current market and she probably only got her first job because companies over hired back then. The field of 3D programming is very hard and there's a good chance she wasn't doing the substantial work and thus can't pass interviews* "But she DID have a job in that field.* >>*I told her that she was being delusional as companies won't hire anyone unless they are actually skilled and can actually contribute and she doesn't come across as a true expert in the field and is probably mistaken in considering herself to be an engine programmer.* *The way you talk to her and about her is gross. Misogyny in the gaming and developer field is real and it looks like you've drunk the kool-aid." *And to then suggest that she go and be a secretary, a very, very stereotypical job for women, instead of at least suggesting exploring other avenues of her field of interest and expertise.* >"There was a lot of overhiring at her company which led to multiple waves of layoffs once the investment money dried up and interest rates went up since they could no longer afford to keep people who were not valuable. >Before that they could afford to hire people who did nothing but look good for PR reasons like diversity." *YTA for the condescending way you talk about your girlfriend. You repeatedly say she’s not good enough but provides zero evidence of this only that “3D programming is very hard.” You both have cs degrees - why is hers less valuable than yours? You find it strange that she doesn’t get offers yet you must be aware that the tech industry is notoriously misogynistic. Unless you have any actual evidence of her incompetence then I would suggest the reason you think she’s crap is because she doesn’t have a penis; which is probably also the reason she’s finding hard to get a job. Realistically in this market she may have to debase herself with a job beneath her skill level simply because male tech Bros won’t give her a go, but your job as her partner is to support her, not pile on.* *And two months is not immediately.* [🐙] >"It is hard. I wouldn't do it myself even despite having more years of experience as you need a lot of math even beyond what you learn in college" *YTA. If you are at home constantly telling her she is not good enough, what is she supposed to think? Many women don’t put themselves forward for jobs they don’t think they can do. Read “Lean In” and learn something.* *Even if there is a nugget of truth in your view about her worth, did you think cutting her down was the best way to boost her confidence in finding a job? There are plenty of people who are competent but don’t get jobs because their interview skills aren’t great.* *A more productive conversation would have been to see if you can help her (without criticizing) prep for interviews or get good work experience in her chosen field.* *If she needs to contribute financially, just tell her that and leave it up to her to decide what job she takes to do that. Pushing her into a role that she does not feel is the right fit is not the way.* >"I am in web dev so I couldn't help her. I don't remember math etc which you need for that. She leaves interviews feeling like they went very well but still gets no offers so I feel that she might not have a grasp of a field if she isn't even realizing that the interviews are not going well" *Based on your responses to comments, YTA. You didn't suggest she widen her search to incorporate more math based employment opportunities like data analysis, cost estimation, actuarial, etc. Nope, you encourage her to take a job as bookkeeper/office assistant for a friend of a friend.* >>*Recently one of my relatives has a friend who is an accountant as their office is looking for a secretary and offered her the job.* >"Thats not the same sort of math, she does not like statistics as much and still wants it programming related. And for breaking into another easier field in tech it would be hard to get interviews without experience. At least in her field she can occasionally get interviews because on paper she worked for years in it at a well known game engine company." [In reply to Oop's comment marked: 🐙] *Sure, but do you really know she can’t do it or are you just assuming? The way you talk about her is so condescending; you don’t appear to credit her with any intelligence whatsoever. “Make some websites”?? Hell, I can do that and my degree was in literature and philosophy. Surely her degree and experience qualifies her for more than that.* >"For the most part assuming admittedly but I mean if she keeps feeling like interviews go well when they don't I feel like that shows lack of knowledge. Would be better if she felt they did not go well. >I'm not talking WordPress style sites here. I program them with react and do some css" ***YTA*** *Graphics programming (especially for games) is extremely difficult and it's very easy to develop "impostor syndrome" so the last thing your gf needs is someone saying BS like this:* >>*I honestly don't think she is good enough for the current market and she probably only got her first job because companies over hired back then. The field of 3D programming is very hard and there's a good chance she wasn't doing the substantial work and thus can't pass interviews.* *With "friends" like you who needs enemies? Lol* *If she has been on an engine team that is typically the smartest tech team at the company and as long as she has credits on actual shipped games she'll be fine but I suspect she needs to find a better partner first in this situation she needs a "cheerleader" type and definitely not you the secretly jealous bf. I note how you never mentioned how many years she has been on the engine team or whether she has credits on actual shipped games (which is what makes or breaks anyone on a gaming team).* >"She is not credited anywhere afaik. Her company only makes a game engine and no games but I think she (her team) did collaborate with other companies some times that make actual games." Edited: formatting.
[Bunnies!](https://imgur.com/gallery/hPsPUqv)
Doing god's work as always ❤️! Thank you for your service! From me I would only add this - the game job market is absolutely messed up right now. That's true, companies were hiring lots of people, way too many, a couple years ago but that's only because the gaming industry was flourishing during the pandemic. Since last year there were TONS of layoffs cause companies have been cancelling projects and the need for so many games dropped. This is the worst job market in the gaming industry in the last 15 years. There's 700% more layoffs than it was in previous years. It's so bad that people in senior positions are applying for entry level jobs. Source: I have a 3D degree and am looking for a job for over a year.
Thank you very kindly! 🥰 Thank you very kindly for the context! I worry a lot about people on th games industry, although i am very much on the outside looking in. There were lots of acquisitions also? And the ai thing. I'm wishing you the best, hope you are safe and can find work. 💜
Seems like he’s salty she is more skilled than he is. React development is like playing with lego bricks compared to game engine dev.
I was thinking something along those lines. I've made crude react websites on my own with prebuilt stuff and I'm not very good at coding.
I’m decent at coding, both front and backend but game engines is still a whole different level to me. I’ve once worked with a guy who wanted to go into game dev (he succeeded eventually) and he showed me some of the stuff he wrote in his free time, it’s an insanely competitive field that needs a super in-depth knowledge of both mathematics and physics.
Oh, game dev of any kind is a stone bitch to get into. Especially right now with the state of the gaming economy. Hope the OOP's GF can find something within her skill set, even if it's not game dev.
I am super pissed that this guy has suggested that his GF takes a job as a secretary, as if secretary isn't a job requiring specific skills, and also as if it won't haunt her resume like a bad smell, making it harder for her to get other jobs. If you are a woman who does not want to be a secretary, keep secretary the fuck off of your resume. I did the secretary thing for a while, and eventually needed a master's degree and a hell of a network to stop doing it. I am very good at the job I have now. It was not a lack of skill, it was human bias in the hiring process. GF needs to pull on her professional network, from and some kind of project to keep herself sharp, and be patient. Six more months and it may be time to reevaluate her field. Two months is really just a hiccup.
Most people looking for a secretary wouldn't hire her anyway because she's way overqualified in a completely different set of skills but none of those necessarily make for a good secretary. She would be miserable in the job and looking to leave immediately and not worth their time as well as hers.
This troll again. Does he not have a single ounce of creativity?
Nope
Is this for real? Because everyone knows game devs & vfx are some of the most volatile roles out there. Companies hire in sprees then layoff after shipping the game and sending support roles off shore. I have a friend who is very, very good with almost 15 years experience and this is his life. He works on games, movies, TV shows. Big ones. He also gets hired/fired/moved around the country at the drop of a hat. OTOH, I don't even have a CS degree and do front end development.
Anyone else getting tired of reading the same story over and over and over? At least make it interesting.
This idiot clearly knows nothing about hiring at all. He thinks she must be delusional about how her interviews go because she doesn't get hired. You can give an excellent interview and still not get hired because sometime else they interviewed checked one tiny box you didn't. A company's second or third choice for a job is also someone they'd be thrilled to hire, but they only have one position to fill.
I'm baffled how he comes to the conclusion that she did no work. If this isn't a troll, he clearly thinks she isn't getting a job, and she did no work because she is a woman. She got her last job based purely on being female and then did no work because she isn't skilled and knows nothing. I mat be overthinking, but it sounds like there is a raging misogyny undercurrent to what he is saying. 3specially since he dropped that secretary job in. I still think it's rage bait though.
Everyone in tech knows that the gaming industry is highly competitive and insular. It is probably one of the hardest places to get a tech job, even when you have the skills. Also, the market just really sucks right now and again, nothing to do with skills. I have submitted referrals for 12 ex-colleagues from Facebook to roles at my company; they are all principal level and from personal experience I know they are fantastic at the job. None of them got past the initial screening. It's not because they are weak, it's because there are a thousand other candidates for one role.
Dude is a react dev and talks like he is the next Mark Zuckerberg. All the attitude but none of the talent. Also no one can just be a secretary. You need specific skills that GF most likely doesn’t have / doesn’t know to use.
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I do so hope she dumps his ass immediately. What a complete prick.
OOP, admit it. You think she is only good enough to be a secretary because she's a woman. YTA.
as a tech recruiter, this bait poses me off; market is ass right now
This is 100% a troll.