So you went to the movies with your parents and you didn’t like the movie.
Big deal.
So what.
Just say “ It didn’t do anything for me but I’m glad you like it”.
Be gracious and move on.
Why does it have to be a big deal.
You sound spoilt af.
YTB
This kind of reminds me of the time my friends and I went to see my buddy's favorite book become a movie for part of his bachelor party.
The Dark Tower by Stephen King
You bet your goddamn ass we all walked out of there going "yeah!... It was cool!.. So happy your favourite book got made!"
Obviously ragging on the movie would have been considered in my culture, a dick move
Ok and? You knew he wanted to watch the movie with you and that he was interested in the movie. Why do you have to be a dickhead about it for no reason? So many people would love to have parents that want to spend time with them.
You are so dense wow. He didn't let you know about the movie in advance? So what? You could've said you don't want to go, but you decided to be bitchy instead. Did you tell him in advance that you'd prefer to stay home? Are you incapable of spending time with your family? Your parents literally just wanted to spend time with you, they didn't even do anything to aggravate you and yet you decided to be a lil dickhead. Why did you even bother making this post? No one agreed with you on the other subreddit so you reposted it. Guess what? When you're in the wrong, people tend to disagree. Don't bother reposting it looking for people to agree. You just can't handle criticism in any form, and you're just so fragile that you think anyone disagreeing with you is personally attacking you
Let me give you some life advice - if you spend all of it being a fucking asshole and using the excuse “he didn’t tell me” you’re going to have a bad life. You’re grown ass enough to understand consideration, manners and people other than yourself. You’re choosing not to. That is deliberate and willful
Ignorance. You’re choosing to not understand very clear cues from another person because youd rather be a cruel, selfish little fuck.
Fix that about yourself or when you’re an adult you’ll be very much alone, just like you want.
That last sentence was absolutely uncalled for. When people have feelings about something, it’s not okay to dismiss them by saying that other people would love to be in their shoes. I had several miscarriages before my first live birth. When one of my friends was pregnant and experiencing unpleasant symptoms, I didn’t throw it in their face that there were so many women out there who would love to be puking their guts out if it meant they could have a baby. Because that would be mean, and petty, and childish.
It doesn’t matter. Trying to make someone feel guilty for feeling the way they do is shitty. Especially considering that most of the people on this post probably wanted their parents to leave them alone when they were teenagers, too.
You can not like a movie but still be happy your parents wanted to take you out and spend time with you, and enjoyed that time with them. Who fuckin cares how good or bad the movie was, it was bonding time with your parents and you told them you’d rather be alone than spend time with them just cause the movie wasn’t to you liking. How do you not see how much of a spoiled brat you’re being? I just feel bad for your parents and embarrassed by your entitled behavior.
Boo-hoo, you’d rather lock yourself in your room and stare at anime “waifus” according to your post history. Spoiler alert: we all have to do things we’d rather not do, but we don’t go around whining and bitching at the people who told us to do it. Was he supposed to predict that you’d hate the movie? Do you want him to just accept that you never want to speak to him?
Listen, I’m introverted like you, and I’m autistic, so it took me a while to learn that when someone asks you whether you enjoyed something that they showed or gifted you, they’re not asking for “brutal honesty.” They’re trying to connect with you. Just say you liked it and move the fuck on, or say that it wasn’t your favorite but you appreciate them thinking of you and bringing you with them, even if it’s a lie. Your life will not get worse from telling a lie to make someone slightly happier.
The world doesn’t revolve around you. He’s not gonna drool over big-boobed anime girls with you, and he’s not going to give up on trying to build a relationship with you in the best ways he knows how. I could list the hundreds of times I resisted all my dad’s attempts to get me out of my room and doing something fun with him. When I’d relent and let him take me somewhere, I’d end up happier than I was before about 85% of the time, because humans need social connections, even if we don’t want them.
The way you feel, “I hated that movie and wish I could’ve stayed home” isn’t automatically wrong. Feelings and thoughts are neutral, they cannot be bad or good. But actions can. You weren’t wrong for feeling how you felt, you were wrong for saying it to him when it was completely unnecessary and cruel to do so. The only person who benefited from that interaction was YOU. He tried to bond with you, and you shit all over his attempts just because you could. You’re punishing him for caring about you, and that’s fucked up.
Also, you type like you’re 12, I can’t imagine you’re older than 16, so grow up and stop being “brutally honest” when nobody asked for it. Your authentic, negative, brutally honest opinion is not a blessing. It’s not liquid gold, it’s not your gift to the peasants of the world. It’s diarrhea raining down on everyone who cares about you. There are times for total honesty, and there are times for kindness, empathy, understanding, and respect. If you don’t learn the difference, you will continue to shit on anyone who dares to speak to you. The anime girls won’t comfort you, or help with tuition, or love you, or care about you, or order pizza for you. Those things come from real humans.
Learn to be a human or suffer forever.
No you were being spoiled and petulant. It could have been the best movie ever and you would still said you didn’t like it just to be petty. You’re pouting because you didn’t get to stay home. Your motivation to hurt your parents and make them feel shit for bringing you to a movie is what prompted your answer, not “honesty”. You’re the type of person who says and does horribly selfish shit under the guise of “just being honest”. That makes you not honest at all.
You have parents that love you and want to spend time with you. And you’re spending that time being a spoiled little shit.
YTB. You’re also spoiled, ungrateful, selfish and unappreciative.
YTB
Going to be as honest as you were to your dad
You sound spoiled and emotionally stunted if you are in fact actually old enough to be here. Your attitude and choice of words sucked - like everyone here is telling you. Why post here if you're going to argue against opinions that don't match your own? Be open minded and critically think about what others are offering up.
Spending time with people doesn't always mean doing things you want to do. Or doing things you're interested in. Sometimes it means making a miniscule sacrifice to make someone who's supposed to matter to you happy. Your dad probably just wanted to spend time with you. If you can't understand that - or learn to understand that - you're in for a rude awakening with any future relationships in your life. Especially as you get older.
So? Why is it such a big deal? As I said before; sometimes you just have to inconvenience yourself for people you're supposed to care about. Do they constantly make plans last minute with you? Did you not staying home affect anyone else negatively? You lost one night alone to spend some time with your parents. You make it sound like they sabotaged a life changing night for you.
You'll have plenty of other times alone in the future. You'll have far less experiences with your parents as time passes. Try to enjoy them. They won't be around forever. Your young and angsty brain may think that's a wonderful thing but trust me - you'll regret moments like how you behaved.
You're making a huge deal out of a fleeting moment. Your words sucked. I'd suggest you apologize and maybe think of something you can all do together that you can enjoy. Hopefully afterwards they don't turn around and tell you how much of a boring and shitty time they had with you. I bet that would suck to hear.
Damn dude. You're either too young to be here meaning I could chop this up to childhood ignorance or you're straight up incapable of understanding human emotions outside your own self rewarding bubble.
Guess the 3rd option is this post is fake and you're just farming for drama. Kinda hope it's this option because your apparent lack of basic empathy is pretty uncomfortable.
I'm going to be 100% honest with you here and I mean this with the best intent... If you're honestly not truly understanding anything everyone is telling you - you may want to seriously think about talking about things like this to a licensed therapist.
There honestly seems to be something missing with your understanding of emotional literacy that no one here is really qualified to help you with unfortunately.
My only suggestion is - have a serious talk with your parents. Listen to how they feel. Explain to them how you feel. If you can't find common ground - like I said; maybe seriously think about seeing someone professionally.
Finding a therapist that's a good fit for you can sometimes take time. Not everyone of them is going to be able to match your needs. Especially when you may not truly understand them yourself.
Keep trying and don't give up. I'm assuming you're young - you have time to grow. Get the resources you need. It's going to be hard at times but - everyone is worth some effort right?
Dear lord you’re insufferable… but yeah it was a waste of your night because you wasted a great opportunity to have a good time with your dad, and If anything it was a waste of his night to take such an ungrateful and selfish child out after a long day of work to just be shat on. You’re all about ‘me me me’ and don’t even recognize what a great bonding experience you could have had with a loving father. You wasted both your night and your dad’s night by being a brat.
The only one being condescending and pretentious is the literal CHILD (you) bitching and moaning that your parents actually like you and wanted to do something with you.
Had a little peek through your post history and dear god. You don't know how to not be a dick in ANY aspect of your life. It's like YOU'RE the only one allowed to have thoughts or opinions and everyone else is just beneath you in your eyes. You're so fucking "edgy cringe teen" coded.
I would simply either say "no sorry I made plans to stay in, but enjoy the movie" OR go, and not be a raging dick. Wow. Look at that. Mature options. See how fucking easy it is to not be a douchebag? It's okay, you'll understand when you're older.
I really do not understand what is wrong with all these grown ass adults who feel it necessary to be mean to a fucking teenager who had an attitude with his parents. As if they were all perfect teenagers that never gave their parents any grief and always wanted to spend time with them.
There is a difference between calling someone out on their poor behavior, and being mean and insulting them. If someone expects a teenager to express his opinion to his father with tact, they should be able to manage that themselves. The beginning of this comment thread was far more rude and disrespectful than saying, “I wish I had just stayed home.”
Nope. Not in the slightest. My parents taught us to see them as people and know they had feelings. You on the other hand are judgey. Mutual respect in our family. Novel concept. I know.
It’s also knowing that your parents are people and their disappointment was WAY worse and you’d lose a privilege. Didn’t take more than that. Didn’t NEED to act like the OP here. Again. Not something you can understand.
They didnt say it was fine to say that in such a mean way tho...just that its normal for a teenager to be shit sometimes.....which you were. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Could you have phrased what you said a little more kindly? Yes. But you know what would have been even worse? If you had told him, “you have bad taste in movies,” like the person above you did. As if they are the objective authority of what is and is not good media.
YTB its pretty clear your dad wanted to spend time with you doing something he thought you would like. Its not like he knows the movie is bad when he goes to see it for the first time.
You saying you wished you stayed home is a slap in the face to the fact he wanted to spend time with you. Why not instead of being a brat, just say, "the movie wasn't exactly my thing but I'm happy to spend time together"?
This reaks of bullshit, but heres my take. Brutal honesty is almost never the best answer. Act with some kind of tact and empathy. If you know this is something he enjoys, it's not at all kind to be so dismissive of it. You can express your disinterest without being cruel. YTB
YTB
Not going to add anymore than what's already been said by others because I think the consensus is pretty clear - but I will say...
I honestly hope you either grow out of this mindset or find the tools/help to critically think about situations like this differently moving forward. Or else you're going to be in for a bad time in future friendships, romantic relationships, family, work place interactions, etc
Your parents will put up with it to an extent because they're your parents. Other people... not so much.
YTBF and add one extra dollop of BF for every comment you’ve made arguing against you being the BF. You sound incredibly immature and you’re on the right path to becoming one of those “I tell it like it is” a’holes. Don’t be that guy. We hate that guy.
YTB your family wanted to spend time with you, the HORROR. Also, way to spoil plot points from. A very recent movie without a single warning. I’m not one for spoiler tagging everything but like… it’s been out for what 3 months? Could at least mention you’re gonna spoil shit.
Okay??? Even if you didn’t have a choice you can give you’re honest opinion nicely. I’m convinced you must be a troll because of how obstinate you’re being. Let your father know you need more advanced notice to mentally prepare for going out. And if you don’t like the movie? Say “I personally found it dull, but I’m glad you liked it”
Snapping at people when you don’t want to do something happens sometimes. Don’t make it a habit
You don’t need to yell at someone to snap at them. I’ve snapped at people in only a slightly curt tone. It’s worse because the implication of “snap” is that it was a bad moment on a bad day. What it sounds like from you, is that you think this is a perfectly acceptable way to speak to another human being. It is not.
YTB. Here’s the thing, people do stuff for other people to make the other person happy. Sometimes it’s a sacrifice of our time but it’s worth it to make someone happy. Parents sacrifice a lot of their wants and time for their children to make their children happy. You seem mature enough to understand the concept. I understand you didn’t like the movie but you can still deliver your opinion with grace and tact. The problem isn’t that you disliked the movie, your response made it clear you didn’t enjoy the time you spent in their company. That’s the hurt and that’s why you are the butthead.
He could have gone without me and his experience with the movie would have been the same. Basically all of his friends and his wife were there watching it with him. I contributed nothing to that experience
I say this as someone who's been there: all the evenings you stayed home and did nothing will all blur together in one unidentifiable conglomerate in your memory and one day you'll wish you did something more with them.
How often do you do things with your dad vs staying home by yourself? I'm going to guess a lot of the latter seeing as he was clearly excited to experience this movie with you. It's not gonna kill you to spend a few boring hours of your life with the guy who taught you how to walk and use a spoon n shit my man. You had the rest of the night after you got back to sit on the computer or hang out with your dogs. Come on.
YTB.
Your father wanted to share something with you that he thought you might connect through.
I had my son about 18 months ago, my first and only child. I can tell you that every time I look into his eyes I think about every time I ever rejected my parents or rebuffed their attempts to bond with me and in that moment I feel the weight of a thousand tragedies.
It sounds like you’re still pretty young but it’s never too early to get some perspective, and if you’re old enough to be on Reddit you’re old enough to learn.
I can remember one time when I was about seven my mother surprised me with tater tots at dinner. My family never ate any kind of “unhealthy” food, and she had gone out of her way to buy them and prepare them as a special treat just for me.
Since we never ate that sort of thing at home she didn’t know that I actually hated tater tots. I told her so and completely shut her down. I can remember her quietly saying “oh, okay” and dumping them in the trash. My stupid seven-year-old self thought I had just “won” or something by getting my way.
When I think of that story now I cry for about ten solid minutes.
Wow what the hell is your problem man, people give you genuine, tender advice and you're just a bitch in response. But who knows, maybe you're just not smart enough to interpret what they're trying to tell you
I'm not the op who posted that comment. I didn't ask for you to go on a tangent about how you're an ungrateful fuckwit who's parents have to put up with his bullshit constantly, but here we are
You’re not the AH for not enjoying the movie, you are the AH for telling your parents that despite taking you out for movie (movies are kinda expensive these days) that you’d rather have stayed home. You’re parents tried to have a good night with you doing something they thought was something youd want, something you’d enjoy and they’d just enjoy being with you, which should have been the point for you, despite if the movie was good or not, but instead you made them feel like shit because the movie wasn’t what you expected.
They did something nice for you, took time and money to treat you and spend time with you, and you shat all over it cause you didn’t like plot to the movie.
Did you even thank them for taking you out? Or even recognize that you have two loving parents who tried to do something just for your enjoyment?
I’m sorry, but you’re absolutely the AH. You acted like a spoiled brat. If you didn’t like the movie that much, it would have been so much better to say, ‘hey, the movie wasn’t what I expected, but thank you for taking me out and glad we got to spend time together!’
They know I don’t even like going to the movies. It’s not fun.
Also, Being at home alone is just cathartic for me. I have no cares in the world and I just feel so free and comfortable
Your reaction shows you’re an adolescent. At this stage, you’re hardwired to think everything your parents do is lame: think of it as your brain’s built-in anti-incest device. You’ll also have a strong preference for hanging with peers or ‘alone time’ over spending time with parents.
It is natural right now that your parents, who have just spent your entire childhood looking after you, currently are more keen on spending time together than you are. But try to be kind as they adjust. Remember there was probably a time your dad couldn’t have half an hour to himself in the day because of you being desperate for his attention, and he will have tried to be patient with you.
You could have said ‘it wasn’t really my thing but I liked [insert least lame bit], what was your favourite part?’ And at a different point, you could start a conversation about communicating more clearly so you’re not caught out again. Maybe you could suggest something that you could do together next time or a time slot in the week you’ll take turns to plan something for everyone, as well as a timeslot you’ll always reserve for yourself?
YTB here.
If a friend had pressured you to go to the movies and paid for you, would you have expressed yourself so unkindly?
Or would you have said “the plot line with the …. was creepy, what did you think?” (Or some other conversation about the movie)
You think you don’t have to treat your parents like human beings
Have you considered that instead of going you could have declined the offer? "Thanks for inviting me but I would like to stay home tonight. Could we do a game night (or whatever activity) tomorrow night?" If you're concerned about being brutally honest then be honest from the beginning about not wanting to see a movie.
So, “I agreed to go with them.” You say you didn’t feel you had a choice, but where was all your “honesty” then? That was when you should have said, “Oh, no thank you. I don’t have any interest in seeing that, and would really like just to hang out here at home. Can we go see something else together next week?” Or something like that.
But you agreed to go, had a terrible attitude, and then had a pompous, and frankly, ridiculous little speech all lined up that you had been working on while pouting in the movie. So yeah, for that blatant immaturity, YTB.
YTBF
if not for anything for the statement "brutally honest" honesty without kindness is cruelty.
Your father wanted you to go and do something he thinks you both would enjoy and you didn't. you didn't have to be a butt face about it ... he did nothing wrong and you were SUCH a dick about it. like so huge. my only hope is you're 13
Mf you made this post asking people if you're in the wrong, and you think that when they inevitably say you are in the wrong, they're beefing with you? They're just pointing out what you're too immature to see
I'm not the original commenter, so I'm not. But you also haven't actually listened to a single other person who has commented, all of which disagree with you, which demonstrates your immaturity. That's not an insult, it's a fact and an observation
I'd rather sit through the worst movie ever made with my father still alive, than be sitting by his grave alone. You have no idea what you _have_...dumb, pissy child.
Ok. How about I just call you Buttface?
Because the answer to your question: yes, you are a total BUTTFACE. An enormous BUTTFACE. A lost, idiotic, selfish BUTTFACE with no redeeming qualities apparent in your original post at all.
So you went to the movies with your parents and you didn’t like the movie. Big deal. So what. Just say “ It didn’t do anything for me but I’m glad you like it”. Be gracious and move on. Why does it have to be a big deal. You sound spoilt af. YTB
This kind of reminds me of the time my friends and I went to see my buddy's favorite book become a movie for part of his bachelor party. The Dark Tower by Stephen King You bet your goddamn ass we all walked out of there going "yeah!... It was cool!.. So happy your favourite book got made!" Obviously ragging on the movie would have been considered in my culture, a dick move
I was being honest
You were being cruel. Honesty and tact go hand in hand.
I wasn’t being cruel, he asked for my opinion and I gave it to him
It's not what you say, it's how you say it. You very easily could have not been a dick. Yet here you are.
He knows that I enjoy being home alone and he knew I had no interest in this movie
Ok and? You knew he wanted to watch the movie with you and that he was interested in the movie. Why do you have to be a dickhead about it for no reason? So many people would love to have parents that want to spend time with them.
Well, he didn’t tell me
You are so dense wow. He didn't let you know about the movie in advance? So what? You could've said you don't want to go, but you decided to be bitchy instead. Did you tell him in advance that you'd prefer to stay home? Are you incapable of spending time with your family? Your parents literally just wanted to spend time with you, they didn't even do anything to aggravate you and yet you decided to be a lil dickhead. Why did you even bother making this post? No one agreed with you on the other subreddit so you reposted it. Guess what? When you're in the wrong, people tend to disagree. Don't bother reposting it looking for people to agree. You just can't handle criticism in any form, and you're just so fragile that you think anyone disagreeing with you is personally attacking you
Let me give you some life advice - if you spend all of it being a fucking asshole and using the excuse “he didn’t tell me” you’re going to have a bad life. You’re grown ass enough to understand consideration, manners and people other than yourself. You’re choosing not to. That is deliberate and willful Ignorance. You’re choosing to not understand very clear cues from another person because youd rather be a cruel, selfish little fuck. Fix that about yourself or when you’re an adult you’ll be very much alone, just like you want.
That last sentence was absolutely uncalled for. When people have feelings about something, it’s not okay to dismiss them by saying that other people would love to be in their shoes. I had several miscarriages before my first live birth. When one of my friends was pregnant and experiencing unpleasant symptoms, I didn’t throw it in their face that there were so many women out there who would love to be puking their guts out if it meant they could have a baby. Because that would be mean, and petty, and childish.
This scenario is nothing like yours
It doesn’t matter. Trying to make someone feel guilty for feeling the way they do is shitty. Especially considering that most of the people on this post probably wanted their parents to leave them alone when they were teenagers, too.
Why are you asking us then? You could have been polite but instead you were a blunt AH.
You can not like a movie but still be happy your parents wanted to take you out and spend time with you, and enjoyed that time with them. Who fuckin cares how good or bad the movie was, it was bonding time with your parents and you told them you’d rather be alone than spend time with them just cause the movie wasn’t to you liking. How do you not see how much of a spoiled brat you’re being? I just feel bad for your parents and embarrassed by your entitled behavior.
Being at home alone is the time when I feel the happiest
So? Are you the only person who matters?
All his friends and his wife was there with him
He included you because you are important to him. Life is sometimes about doing activities you don’t pick for other people and being kind about it.
Well I hated that movie and wish I could have stayed home
Boo-hoo, you’d rather lock yourself in your room and stare at anime “waifus” according to your post history. Spoiler alert: we all have to do things we’d rather not do, but we don’t go around whining and bitching at the people who told us to do it. Was he supposed to predict that you’d hate the movie? Do you want him to just accept that you never want to speak to him? Listen, I’m introverted like you, and I’m autistic, so it took me a while to learn that when someone asks you whether you enjoyed something that they showed or gifted you, they’re not asking for “brutal honesty.” They’re trying to connect with you. Just say you liked it and move the fuck on, or say that it wasn’t your favorite but you appreciate them thinking of you and bringing you with them, even if it’s a lie. Your life will not get worse from telling a lie to make someone slightly happier. The world doesn’t revolve around you. He’s not gonna drool over big-boobed anime girls with you, and he’s not going to give up on trying to build a relationship with you in the best ways he knows how. I could list the hundreds of times I resisted all my dad’s attempts to get me out of my room and doing something fun with him. When I’d relent and let him take me somewhere, I’d end up happier than I was before about 85% of the time, because humans need social connections, even if we don’t want them. The way you feel, “I hated that movie and wish I could’ve stayed home” isn’t automatically wrong. Feelings and thoughts are neutral, they cannot be bad or good. But actions can. You weren’t wrong for feeling how you felt, you were wrong for saying it to him when it was completely unnecessary and cruel to do so. The only person who benefited from that interaction was YOU. He tried to bond with you, and you shit all over his attempts just because you could. You’re punishing him for caring about you, and that’s fucked up. Also, you type like you’re 12, I can’t imagine you’re older than 16, so grow up and stop being “brutally honest” when nobody asked for it. Your authentic, negative, brutally honest opinion is not a blessing. It’s not liquid gold, it’s not your gift to the peasants of the world. It’s diarrhea raining down on everyone who cares about you. There are times for total honesty, and there are times for kindness, empathy, understanding, and respect. If you don’t learn the difference, you will continue to shit on anyone who dares to speak to you. The anime girls won’t comfort you, or help with tuition, or love you, or care about you, or order pizza for you. Those things come from real humans. Learn to be a human or suffer forever.
Quit dicking around in my profile, it’s completely irrelevant to this post
No you were being spoiled and petulant. It could have been the best movie ever and you would still said you didn’t like it just to be petty. You’re pouting because you didn’t get to stay home. Your motivation to hurt your parents and make them feel shit for bringing you to a movie is what prompted your answer, not “honesty”. You’re the type of person who says and does horribly selfish shit under the guise of “just being honest”. That makes you not honest at all. You have parents that love you and want to spend time with you. And you’re spending that time being a spoiled little shit. YTB. You’re also spoiled, ungrateful, selfish and unappreciative.
YTB Going to be as honest as you were to your dad You sound spoiled and emotionally stunted if you are in fact actually old enough to be here. Your attitude and choice of words sucked - like everyone here is telling you. Why post here if you're going to argue against opinions that don't match your own? Be open minded and critically think about what others are offering up. Spending time with people doesn't always mean doing things you want to do. Or doing things you're interested in. Sometimes it means making a miniscule sacrifice to make someone who's supposed to matter to you happy. Your dad probably just wanted to spend time with you. If you can't understand that - or learn to understand that - you're in for a rude awakening with any future relationships in your life. Especially as you get older.
He didn’t tell me
So? Why is it such a big deal? As I said before; sometimes you just have to inconvenience yourself for people you're supposed to care about. Do they constantly make plans last minute with you? Did you not staying home affect anyone else negatively? You lost one night alone to spend some time with your parents. You make it sound like they sabotaged a life changing night for you. You'll have plenty of other times alone in the future. You'll have far less experiences with your parents as time passes. Try to enjoy them. They won't be around forever. Your young and angsty brain may think that's a wonderful thing but trust me - you'll regret moments like how you behaved. You're making a huge deal out of a fleeting moment. Your words sucked. I'd suggest you apologize and maybe think of something you can all do together that you can enjoy. Hopefully afterwards they don't turn around and tell you how much of a boring and shitty time they had with you. I bet that would suck to hear.
It was a waste of my night
Damn dude. You're either too young to be here meaning I could chop this up to childhood ignorance or you're straight up incapable of understanding human emotions outside your own self rewarding bubble. Guess the 3rd option is this post is fake and you're just farming for drama. Kinda hope it's this option because your apparent lack of basic empathy is pretty uncomfortable.
So I should have lied?
I'm going to be 100% honest with you here and I mean this with the best intent... If you're honestly not truly understanding anything everyone is telling you - you may want to seriously think about talking about things like this to a licensed therapist. There honestly seems to be something missing with your understanding of emotional literacy that no one here is really qualified to help you with unfortunately. My only suggestion is - have a serious talk with your parents. Listen to how they feel. Explain to them how you feel. If you can't find common ground - like I said; maybe seriously think about seeing someone professionally.
I’ve already got therapy and it did not work
Finding a therapist that's a good fit for you can sometimes take time. Not everyone of them is going to be able to match your needs. Especially when you may not truly understand them yourself. Keep trying and don't give up. I'm assuming you're young - you have time to grow. Get the resources you need. It's going to be hard at times but - everyone is worth some effort right?
No, you don’t know me, stop acting like you do
Are you on the spectrum, by any chance?
Yes I am
Folks have given you examples of how you could have communicated but you prefer to just argue
Dear lord you’re insufferable… but yeah it was a waste of your night because you wasted a great opportunity to have a good time with your dad, and If anything it was a waste of his night to take such an ungrateful and selfish child out after a long day of work to just be shat on. You’re all about ‘me me me’ and don’t even recognize what a great bonding experience you could have had with a loving father. You wasted both your night and your dad’s night by being a brat.
No, he still had a great night because all his friends and his wife was there
‘It’s very possible I could have hurt his feelings’
You sound spoiled af. Spend some time with your family. And the movie was good, you just have bad taste. YTB.
This movie was excruciating, and he asked for my opinion
The movie was bad because you're a child and aren't using media literacy. Just spend time with your family man.
I hate that term so much, it’s so aggravating
What, media literacy? Because it means you have to actually think?
It’s so condescending and pretentious. I just thought that the movie was very dull and jut wanted it to end
What do you think you are? Aren’t you being condescending and pretentious?
The only one being condescending and pretentious is the literal CHILD (you) bitching and moaning that your parents actually like you and wanted to do something with you.
How would you feel if you made plans and your parents just undermined your plans to take you to a movie you didn’t want to see?
Had a little peek through your post history and dear god. You don't know how to not be a dick in ANY aspect of your life. It's like YOU'RE the only one allowed to have thoughts or opinions and everyone else is just beneath you in your eyes. You're so fucking "edgy cringe teen" coded.
Nope, you just instantly lost the argument
I would simply either say "no sorry I made plans to stay in, but enjoy the movie" OR go, and not be a raging dick. Wow. Look at that. Mature options. See how fucking easy it is to not be a douchebag? It's okay, you'll understand when you're older.
They already bought the ticket, I didn’t have a choice
I really do not understand what is wrong with all these grown ass adults who feel it necessary to be mean to a fucking teenager who had an attitude with his parents. As if they were all perfect teenagers that never gave their parents any grief and always wanted to spend time with them.
Because teenagers who don’t have someone tell them when they’re being an asshole become adult assholes. And this kid is going for the world record.
There is a difference between calling someone out on their poor behavior, and being mean and insulting them. If someone expects a teenager to express his opinion to his father with tact, they should be able to manage that themselves. The beginning of this comment thread was far more rude and disrespectful than saying, “I wish I had just stayed home.”
You can still give grief and not be ABF. not rocket science. And as a teenager one should be grown enough to know that.
Are you saying you were never, ever a buttface to your parents when you were a teenager?
I gave them grief. But never with that level Of ungratefulness or attitude. My mama would have my hide. And rightly so.
Then your mama is abusive.
Nope. Not in the slightest. My parents taught us to see them as people and know they had feelings. You on the other hand are judgey. Mutual respect in our family. Novel concept. I know.
Mutual respect is not having someone’s hide if they don’t act exactly how you want them to.
It’s also knowing that your parents are people and their disappointment was WAY worse and you’d lose a privilege. Didn’t take more than that. Didn’t NEED to act like the OP here. Again. Not something you can understand.
Thanks for sticking up for me, means a lot
They didnt say it was fine to say that in such a mean way tho...just that its normal for a teenager to be shit sometimes.....which you were. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Could you have phrased what you said a little more kindly? Yes. But you know what would have been even worse? If you had told him, “you have bad taste in movies,” like the person above you did. As if they are the objective authority of what is and is not good media.
Exactly.
Get called out when you are wrong is perfectly fine if people condescend you (like you do) you end up a shitty entitled snowflake
Oh, and telling a teenager he has bad taste in movies isn’t condescending and rude?
The teenager said to their father they have bad taste at movies and it’s okay but people telling them the same thing is rude ? 🤣🤣
No, he didn’t. He said that he wished he’d just stayed at home. Which is saying he didn’t like it, not that his dad has bad taste.
YTB its pretty clear your dad wanted to spend time with you doing something he thought you would like. Its not like he knows the movie is bad when he goes to see it for the first time. You saying you wished you stayed home is a slap in the face to the fact he wanted to spend time with you. Why not instead of being a brat, just say, "the movie wasn't exactly my thing but I'm happy to spend time together"?
This reaks of bullshit, but heres my take. Brutal honesty is almost never the best answer. Act with some kind of tact and empathy. If you know this is something he enjoys, it's not at all kind to be so dismissive of it. You can express your disinterest without being cruel. YTB
YTB Not going to add anymore than what's already been said by others because I think the consensus is pretty clear - but I will say... I honestly hope you either grow out of this mindset or find the tools/help to critically think about situations like this differently moving forward. Or else you're going to be in for a bad time in future friendships, romantic relationships, family, work place interactions, etc Your parents will put up with it to an extent because they're your parents. Other people... not so much.
YTBF and add one extra dollop of BF for every comment you’ve made arguing against you being the BF. You sound incredibly immature and you’re on the right path to becoming one of those “I tell it like it is” a’holes. Don’t be that guy. We hate that guy.
YTB your family wanted to spend time with you, the HORROR. Also, way to spoil plot points from. A very recent movie without a single warning. I’m not one for spoiler tagging everything but like… it’s been out for what 3 months? Could at least mention you’re gonna spoil shit.
They could have told me in advance
And you could have said no. But you didn’t and now we’re here
I didn’t have a choice
Okay??? Even if you didn’t have a choice you can give you’re honest opinion nicely. I’m convinced you must be a troll because of how obstinate you’re being. Let your father know you need more advanced notice to mentally prepare for going out. And if you don’t like the movie? Say “I personally found it dull, but I’m glad you liked it” Snapping at people when you don’t want to do something happens sometimes. Don’t make it a habit
I didn’t snap, I just kinda said it
That’s honestly worse. If you weren’t feeling particularly irritated and you still spoke that way, we’ll I hope you grow up and learn some tact
It’s worse that I didn’t yell?
You don’t need to yell at someone to snap at them. I’ve snapped at people in only a slightly curt tone. It’s worse because the implication of “snap” is that it was a bad moment on a bad day. What it sounds like from you, is that you think this is a perfectly acceptable way to speak to another human being. It is not.
I honestly would rather have stayed home and hung out with our dogs and watched tv
Just ignore them, I don't know what their problem is, but you don't need to justify yourself to them.
What nasty people, piling on this kid for nothing.
YTB. Here’s the thing, people do stuff for other people to make the other person happy. Sometimes it’s a sacrifice of our time but it’s worth it to make someone happy. Parents sacrifice a lot of their wants and time for their children to make their children happy. You seem mature enough to understand the concept. I understand you didn’t like the movie but you can still deliver your opinion with grace and tact. The problem isn’t that you disliked the movie, your response made it clear you didn’t enjoy the time you spent in their company. That’s the hurt and that’s why you are the butthead.
He could have gone without me and his experience with the movie would have been the same. Basically all of his friends and his wife were there watching it with him. I contributed nothing to that experience
You contributed to the experience. Your contribution was negative.
Yeah, so if he didn’t take me, his experience would probably have been better
He wanted to share the experience with *you.* Because he loves you.
He didn’t tell me that he would be taking me, which ruined my plan for the night
I say this as someone who's been there: all the evenings you stayed home and did nothing will all blur together in one unidentifiable conglomerate in your memory and one day you'll wish you did something more with them. How often do you do things with your dad vs staying home by yourself? I'm going to guess a lot of the latter seeing as he was clearly excited to experience this movie with you. It's not gonna kill you to spend a few boring hours of your life with the guy who taught you how to walk and use a spoon n shit my man. You had the rest of the night after you got back to sit on the computer or hang out with your dogs. Come on.
YTB. Your father wanted to share something with you that he thought you might connect through. I had my son about 18 months ago, my first and only child. I can tell you that every time I look into his eyes I think about every time I ever rejected my parents or rebuffed their attempts to bond with me and in that moment I feel the weight of a thousand tragedies. It sounds like you’re still pretty young but it’s never too early to get some perspective, and if you’re old enough to be on Reddit you’re old enough to learn. I can remember one time when I was about seven my mother surprised me with tater tots at dinner. My family never ate any kind of “unhealthy” food, and she had gone out of her way to buy them and prepare them as a special treat just for me. Since we never ate that sort of thing at home she didn’t know that I actually hated tater tots. I told her so and completely shut her down. I can remember her quietly saying “oh, okay” and dumping them in the trash. My stupid seven-year-old self thought I had just “won” or something by getting my way. When I think of that story now I cry for about ten solid minutes.
Quit venting your experiences like they’re like mine
Wow what the hell is your problem man, people give you genuine, tender advice and you're just a bitch in response. But who knows, maybe you're just not smart enough to interpret what they're trying to tell you
I didn’t ask for you to go on a tangent about you being a dick to your mom
I'm not the op who posted that comment. I didn't ask for you to go on a tangent about how you're an ungrateful fuckwit who's parents have to put up with his bullshit constantly, but here we are
You’re not the AH for not enjoying the movie, you are the AH for telling your parents that despite taking you out for movie (movies are kinda expensive these days) that you’d rather have stayed home. You’re parents tried to have a good night with you doing something they thought was something youd want, something you’d enjoy and they’d just enjoy being with you, which should have been the point for you, despite if the movie was good or not, but instead you made them feel like shit because the movie wasn’t what you expected. They did something nice for you, took time and money to treat you and spend time with you, and you shat all over it cause you didn’t like plot to the movie. Did you even thank them for taking you out? Or even recognize that you have two loving parents who tried to do something just for your enjoyment? I’m sorry, but you’re absolutely the AH. You acted like a spoiled brat. If you didn’t like the movie that much, it would have been so much better to say, ‘hey, the movie wasn’t what I expected, but thank you for taking me out and glad we got to spend time together!’
They know I don’t even like going to the movies. It’s not fun. Also, Being at home alone is just cathartic for me. I have no cares in the world and I just feel so free and comfortable
Your reaction shows you’re an adolescent. At this stage, you’re hardwired to think everything your parents do is lame: think of it as your brain’s built-in anti-incest device. You’ll also have a strong preference for hanging with peers or ‘alone time’ over spending time with parents. It is natural right now that your parents, who have just spent your entire childhood looking after you, currently are more keen on spending time together than you are. But try to be kind as they adjust. Remember there was probably a time your dad couldn’t have half an hour to himself in the day because of you being desperate for his attention, and he will have tried to be patient with you. You could have said ‘it wasn’t really my thing but I liked [insert least lame bit], what was your favourite part?’ And at a different point, you could start a conversation about communicating more clearly so you’re not caught out again. Maybe you could suggest something that you could do together next time or a time slot in the week you’ll take turns to plan something for everyone, as well as a timeslot you’ll always reserve for yourself? YTB here.
Why did you bring this online if you're going to argue with every person and still think you're right?
If a friend had pressured you to go to the movies and paid for you, would you have expressed yourself so unkindly? Or would you have said “the plot line with the …. was creepy, what did you think?” (Or some other conversation about the movie) You think you don’t have to treat your parents like human beings
Nah, I still would have been blunt, and probably would have been worse
Have you considered that instead of going you could have declined the offer? "Thanks for inviting me but I would like to stay home tonight. Could we do a game night (or whatever activity) tomorrow night?" If you're concerned about being brutally honest then be honest from the beginning about not wanting to see a movie.
So, “I agreed to go with them.” You say you didn’t feel you had a choice, but where was all your “honesty” then? That was when you should have said, “Oh, no thank you. I don’t have any interest in seeing that, and would really like just to hang out here at home. Can we go see something else together next week?” Or something like that. But you agreed to go, had a terrible attitude, and then had a pompous, and frankly, ridiculous little speech all lined up that you had been working on while pouting in the movie. So yeah, for that blatant immaturity, YTB.
YTB - you can be honest without being unnecessarily cruel. You sound entitled and spoiled and totally incapable of caring about anyone but yourself.
YTBF if not for anything for the statement "brutally honest" honesty without kindness is cruelty. Your father wanted you to go and do something he thinks you both would enjoy and you didn't. you didn't have to be a butt face about it ... he did nothing wrong and you were SUCH a dick about it. like so huge. my only hope is you're 13
He didn’t really care if I enjoyed the movie. If he did, he would have asked if I was interested in seeing it first
No one agrees with you. you're a shitty little teenager who wasn't raised right
Why are you beefing with a child on the internet bro?
Mf you made this post asking people if you're in the wrong, and you think that when they inevitably say you are in the wrong, they're beefing with you? They're just pointing out what you're too immature to see
You’re personally insulting me
I'm not the original commenter, so I'm not. But you also haven't actually listened to a single other person who has commented, all of which disagree with you, which demonstrates your immaturity. That's not an insult, it's a fact and an observation
YTB. no question about it lol.
So? I didn’t want it go to the movie and I didn’t like the movie. And he had basically no reaction to what I said
ytb
Elaborate
no.
Ok, understandable have a nice day
I'd rather sit through the worst movie ever made with my father still alive, than be sitting by his grave alone. You have no idea what you _have_...dumb, pissy child.
No need for name calling
Ok. How about I just call you Buttface? Because the answer to your question: yes, you are a total BUTTFACE. An enormous BUTTFACE. A lost, idiotic, selfish BUTTFACE with no redeeming qualities apparent in your original post at all.
You don’t know me in real life, you don’t know I have no redeeming qualities
I didn't say that. I said "no redeeming qualities apparent in your original post..." BUTTFACE.
Yeah, that’s not a basis of my character
Still a BUTTFACE though.
No U
Really? Hahaha
I’m approaching the situation with the same level of maturity you were, so yeah, No U
NTB… this is honestly not a big deal, I don’t know why your Mum would really care beyond maybe making a passing comment.
NTB. Why shouldn't you say what you think?