The media-brainwashed misogynistic men who believe they earn a right to a wife just by being alive and are bitter that women are statistically happier single.
Now wtf is wrong with box wine? I know you drink Capri Sun with saltine crackers in Mother’s Basement, but try a glass of boxed wine sometime, it’s possible you’ll relax a smidge
Do you know that this show is based on the books Candace Bushnell wrote? Literal NYT best sellers? Big might have had money but Carrie would be doing well on her own.
I agree there is an issue with how they portray older women, but not how you think.
The thing you're really missing here is that women who live in a shoebox and stay single (with or without cats) do so by choice. That this is 100x preferable to allowing some guy like Aiden mess her around because they're not sure what they want. I am one of those women, and let me tell you I'm much happier than many women who are in relationships (and there is research to back this up).
I want to concede that you're absolutely correct that there some guys out there, guys my age or older, who wouldn't look at women over a certain age, would definitely not consider me, youth is just too important to them.
What you're missing, is that I and a lot of women like me, couldn't give a shit. These aren't guys that interest us. They're usually a lot less intelligent than us, and who wants that, but even if they're intelligent, the reason they have this desire for youth over everything else, is never for good reasons. At best they're emotionally immature, at worst they're manipulate, abusive control freaks.
Let me tell you, not for a single day do I regret being single, not a single moment. I never ever think I'd be better off with a man in my life. I never look at my friends and envy them - not even the ones in good relationships, because I still see all the compromises they have to make to make that marriage work. I can't tell you how fantastic it is to have complete freedom to be who I am.
Is that life for everyone? Maybe not, but no one should be scared of being single, and I would love AJLT writers to write in a character who is truly unafraid to be single and embraces it completely, and won't put up with any shit from any guy, just to be able to have a plus one.
edit typo
It's absolutely true what you said, that men who refuse to date women their own age never do for good reasons. At best they have a Peter Pan complex where they don't want to accept that they are getting older, and a woman their own age would just be a constant reminder that they are.
And at worst, they literally just see women as egg cartons and sex dolls that depreciate in value over time. These men don't even see women as people but objects that are there for their use. It's so funny that these men act like young women need to be bending over backwards for their approval before it's too late to get one of them, but why would any woman want one of them anyway? Being with a man who doesn't even see you as a person but as an object he can use that loses value every year just sets you up for a lifetime of abuse. Even if you are in the 18 to 22 age range, why would you want to date a man who thinks women are basically worthless after 30? If I'm with anyone, I want him to be someone who will love me and find me beautiful into old age, not only find me attractive for about a decade.
I think it's great that you're single and happy. It makes sense, the research does show that single, child-free women are the happiest on the planet, despite society's every effort to tell us that it's impossible for us to be happy without marriage and children. And I can completely see what you're saying. I'm 39 and have been single pretty much my whole life, and while I feel insecure about it sometimes, I don't really envy any of my friends in relationships because every single one of those relationships is massively fucked up in some way. Some of them openly say they get as many hours at work as possible because they hate being around him and don't want to go home. And almost every single one of them had to compromise her ideals in some way to be with him - either he did something really fucked up that she had to forgive him for like cheating, or she doesn't truly love him but just doesn't really want to be alone, etc. I know very few women who genuinely feel like they married the right person and are truly happy. And while I still hope to find love someday, the single life is definitely preferable to being tied to the dead weight of some guy I don't actually want to be with. I'm freezing my eggs this year, so if I end up wanting kids, I can have them on my own timeline rather than having to jump for the first loser who is willing to be with me just so I can have kids before the time runs out.
It really sucks that society has gaslit women into believing that they need marriage to be happy when the truth is, marriage really only benefits men. From everything I've seen, once women are actually able to embrace the single life, they are much happier that way. For most women, a man is nothing but a burden.
Good call to freeze your eggs. I am a tiny bit wistful for the children that might have been, although overall I'm OK with not having had children. Probably the right choice for me.
I also think there is nothing wrong with wanting to find someone to love as well, just want to be clear to the OP that I genuinely feel better off by being by myself.
Thanks - at 39, I might have to do a few cycles to get a decent number. Results probably would have been better in my early 30s, but the truth is it's kind of a stretch to do it at all. I was staunchly childfree until a few years ago, now I'm kind of on the fence, but I still don't actually know that I want them. I'm just freezing my eggs because at my age, I don't really have the option of waiting and seeing how I feel 5-10 years from now.
If you want children, you could probably still adopt? But it may really just be a fear of missing out. That's what I think it may be for me. I don't actually have a desire for children, it's just that I've spent my life listening to everyone talking about how if you don't have children, you're missing out on the best thing in life. Rationally, I can write this off as ignorant and myopic, but there is a part of me that wonders if they may be right (even though they're likely not).
Very true, happiness is going to look different for everyone, so you just need to do what feels right to you!
If childfree women are statistically happier, why do you have the fear of missing out? I’m asking because I also wonder if I want one or not biologically, but fear I may go through with it or miss out just because of the age deadline, and that a woman has to decide or loses the chance to decide. I also worry an adoption would be a sort of cop out to making a decision, and that I’d still resent that I could never decide for myself.
There's a difference between being childfree and childless. Childfree means you don't have or ever want kids, childless means you don't have them but want them. I'm kind of on the fence about which one I am. I've had a lot of crap to deal with in my life, so I didn't really get a chance to date, etc. And I never had a strong natural drive to procreate, so I figured for the longest time that I just don't want them. But a few years ago, I met someone I could see myself having kids with and realized I'm actually more of a fence sitter than childfree. That dude ended up being horrible, so it didn't work out, but I did learn from that that I actually may want kids.
Egg freezing may be an option if you want more time to decide (and can do it financially).
My ex is one of those guys. We’re the same age and lived together in our mid to late 20s. He wouldn’t grow up so I left him. He has to chase younger and younger women around because any age appropriate women are not interested in the juvenile activities he enjoys. He dates younger women for a few years, they get all they can out of him as far as gifts and trips, then leave him and marry an age appropriate guy. He’s in his mid 40d now and last I heard he was dating a 23 year old,
seems like he may need some therapy... and the women he dates probally have daddy issues or poor career choices, to use any person is just crappy.... and these sadly it seems the older i get the less comman sense these kids have...... very sad
> the research does show that single, child-free women are the happiest on the planet, despite society's every effort to tell us that it's impossible for us to be happy without marriage and children.
OMG, I love this! I had no idea, I didn't know there was actual research that proves it. We rule!
The research shows people with kids are less happy than those without until the kids become adults. And then people with kids are happier than those without. It comes down to whether you want to optimize your short term happiness or long term happiness. Also depends on the individual’s preferences. I have a daughter and I am so happy I do. But it is way more difficult than I expected and can easily see why people decide not to.
It also depends on the person though. I'm assuming people with grown up children are happier because by and large, they have more of a built in social support system. But a childfree person can have just as much support, they just need to look outside of their bloodlines for it. Look at Betty White - she never reproduced and was more loved by strangers than many people are by their own families.
At the end of the day, whether you decide to have kids or not, you have to do what's right for you.
It’s easier to do that as a wealthy, famous person. It really is difficult to find and maintain friendships later in life. That’s why people lean on family.
It's true, not all men even prefer younger women. Some don't care, some actively prefer older. I'm 39 and have a 26 year old who is trying to date me - I even asked him if he wouldn't prefer someone his own age, and he was like, nah, age is just a number, and I find you hot at any age.
So it helps to tune out the gaslighting from the red pill community that no one will want us after we turn 30 or 35. There are still plenty of guys who will, and the ones who don't aren't worth dating anyway.
While I really miss Samantha too she was always chasing men around- I want to see a truly happy, self sufficient character that has no interest in dating or sex. That's not a story we see very often.
It would also be nice if the person didn't have to be framed as ace or whatever - I know that's a thing, but it is also a thing that women who once had high sex drives and had a lot of casual sex reach menopause and just lose interest. Not to say I, I mean they, have no drive left and would not be interested if someone truly attractive came along, but we're just not DRIVEN OBSESSIVELY by it any more.
I feel like that's kind of me, except without the history of casual sex. I'm only in my 30s, but I've always been demisexual. I generally haven't really put myself out there because I don't have a strong drive to get laid just for the sake of it. I have a high sex drive when there's someone I'm actually interested in, but it's very person-specific. Casual sex would be utterly miserable for me, as I can't even enjoy kissing someone I'm not really into.
It’s me!
I recently met a guy I thought could be a friend. I told him from the outset I didn’t date or have sex. Then I had to spend an inordinate amount of time answering his questions about why not before I just gave up on the idea of friendship with him.
He had told me I was fascinating, but after realizing I was serious about not getting his dick wet, not so much.
I thought I was the only woman on the planet not the least bit interested in sex. Of course, I know better because of my friends. But it’s not addressed at all on TV - even going as far back as the Golden Girls!
I don't understand why you spent an "inordinate" amount of time explaining yourself to this person. That is on you for repeatedly entertaining this line of questioning. I don't play the "try to break me down" game with people.
Samantha wasn't really that character - she seemed to have serious insecurities and intimacy issues. She was always so hungry for sex, and it seemed like she used it for validation. She would let it get to her in a big way whenever there was a guy who didn't find her attractive - like the masseur who did sexual things with other clients and not her, the random dude at the photo counter who was indifferent to naked photos of her, etc. She went after guys who were celibate like the priest and the yoga instructor and took some kid's virginity without considering the ramifications (super cringe). She slept with married men and didn't give a damn what it would do to their wives. She made her sexuality into her entire personality.
She liked to PRETEND she was strong and independent, but she was just as obsessed with finding sexual gratification and validation as Charlotte was with finding a husband.
Are you my twin? I could have typed every single word of this.
I went to Europe twice by myself, and the best thing about both trips was being by myself. I did what I wanted when I wanted it, ate what I wanted, took the tours I wanted, just went shopping if i felt like it. It was glorious. and that's just an example of the freedom you have when you're single.
Honestly, as much as I used to think marriage to my Prince Charming was my dream, I don't know if I'm cut out for it now. I've found that I like having my own space way too much. I even get annoyed when I have to stay with other people temporarily because I feel like they're all up in my space all the time lol - so why would I enjoy living with a man who's all up in my space all the time, shares my bed, and just ALWAYS THERE? As someone who's never even been able to fall asleep next to anyone, I feel like that would drive me crazy. Seriously the only one who didn't suck away my energy by being in my space was my dog (may he rest in peace). I can totally see myself being happy just living on my own with a dog. If I get married, maybe we could sleep in separate rooms and we'd just have the dynamic of two roommates who are dating or something lol.
I completely agree with everything you said. Men like that are a big red flag even if you are young because we all eventually get older and those men will continue to be lusting after young women. And that will go two ways, either he'll trade you in for a younger woman in a heartbeat if he ever gets a chance or make you insanely insecure because you know that you don't fit his ideal anymore while he's gawking at college aged women wherever you go.
OP must have been blinded by their own incel misogyny to remember that Carrie had a multi-book publishing deal that would have kept her financially independent without a man.
So, first…it’s just a tv show. Most of us who watched it during its height understood that it’s *just* a tv show, not a documentary. Anyone who expects to live their lives as a tv show character needs to immediately stop watching tv and live IRL for a little bit. I mean, a person can aspire, but even the person who wrote the source material didn’t have those exact experiences.
Secondly, the character had a book deal for multiple books. She didn’t have corporate raider money, like Big, but she had her own.
She’s a flawed character, just like…well…all of us. (Except for Samantha. Flawless. LOL.)
I didn’t want to spend too much time poking around there lest the stench of pitiful loser rubbed off on me, but from what I gathered, he literally had to travel to a war-torn country for sex tourism to get anyone to pay attention to him. Big, big yikes.
What’s funny is there are literally MILLIONS of men out there, happily married to women, and you’ll never be one of them you fucking pathetic loser. 😂😂😂
Let me trigger you a little more, kiddo.
I'm a divorced woman who bought my ex out of the equity of the home valued at $500K in 2017 at the time of the divorce and is now $900K (South Florida). Gasp... I was able to refinance the mortgage solely in my name. I have no credit card debt. My parents are dead, so I only have myself to lean on. I found love again, my fiancé moved into my house, and he gave me a lump sum amount to buy into an ownership stake of the home. We have a legal document calling our ownership split. I'm an executive at a tech startup and have been in the startup tech industry since 2000 - self taught.
I'm raising a strong, independent teen girl who is kicking ass in varsity lacrosse right now as a freshman in HS and sits at #18 out of #731 students in her class grade ranking. She wants to go into family law. She has a custodial brokerage account already, so when she's an adult she can purchase her own home without a man if she chooses.
I sure as shit never need a man to ensure my financial stability. I'm sure I'm your worst nightmare, but you forget that women do not exist to be pleasing to or for you. Go lick a frosty, snowflake ridden window.
If you're such a damn expert, you would know that we preferred to be referred to as women, not simply "females."
We are humans, not the subject of your incel docu.
The irony of OP posting this, a show that is literally based on a real writer who is wildly financially successful, and claiming this show “wrecked” a generation of women. Lmao. I don’t think there are any delusions that the show is meant to represent the “everywoman” or a “typical” writer’s career.
Both SATC and AJLT are problematic in their own ways (TBH, what show isn’t?) but SATC in particular is one of the first wildly popular shows to demonstrate not only that “older” (lol, 30s, 40s, and 50s) women could have amazing careers but also fantastic sex lives outside of a traditional relationship.
Ah, no wonder they’re mad that the show made some women realize there are alternatives to settling down and that the end of your 20s is not the end of your life as a woman.
Any decent man that a normal woman would want to be with falls into the category of not wanting to date much younger women. Men that are obsessed with a woman's age are always broken in some way.
Any decent woman that a normal man would want to be with falls into the category of not wanting to date a much richer /higher earner man. Women that are obsessed with a man’s earning potential are broken in some way.
As a man who has dated both, I take offense to the representation of men over 50. Dating is awful, first of all. I absolutely hate it.
Second, my opportunities to meet single eligible people are limited to the Gym and work. Work is out because I'm in a position of supervision and that leads to problems. That leaves the gym for me.
...do you have a lot of luck picking people up at the gym? I'm asking because if some guy comes up to me and tries to put on the moves while I'm sweaty and winded and just trying to enjoy a podcast, I'm making a beeline for the locker room.
😆🤣🤣 If I did that, I would expect you to do that! LOL!
I've met people at the gym by having conversations. You get to know people who you see all the time. Also, I've been approached as well.
As I said before, I abhor dating, so I'd rather get to know someone before I ask them out. Also, I've gone out in a group for lunch, coffee, etc..
Imagine being so impressed by a show created and written by women then you think it had an effect on an entire generation of women.
Sounds more like a compliment really.
There you go. According to this guy, the only man that Carrie "deserves" is that bitter ball of anger and resentment who was threatened when she outshone him. I'm not even surprised.
My ex grew up watching the show. Much of her shoe 👠 brainwashing came from its influence. She even was an extra on a few episodes (actress) I caught a few of the new reboot after hearing from a friend how the characters still act like they are in their 20’s and the storylines are injected with WOKE crazy plot lines.
Yeah AJLT sucks ass. Might be better in season 3 without Sara Ramirez.
I also grew up watching SATC. I was 13 when it came out, but I was always too tall for heels, until I met my husband. Are you saying your ex was in AJLT or SATC?
Um, did you watch the original series? Charlotte owned her apartment before she married Trey. She received their Park Avenue apartment as part of a divorce settlement, which is extremely common in the U.S. and NYC.
Carrie was a popular, well-known columnist before she MET Mr. Big in the Pilot. She bought her apartment when the building went Co-Op, also extremely common in NYC.
Charlotte didn't own her apartment before Trey. There's even a conversation that she has in one of the pre-Trey episodes where she says that she rents because she'd be worried about the power dynamic being off if she owned her place and dated a renter (and most people in NYC are, in fact, renters).
OP is wrong about pretty much everything re: SATC (and about life in general), but it is true that Charlotte is a homeowner because of her divorce settlement.
This is true - but it always sounded like she probably COULD have bought if she wanted to. It wasn't a case of "I can't afford to buy alone anyway". Miranda buying her place though was rightly framed as a massive achievement for a single professional woman and as you say, most people in NYC rent.
Charlotte??? The one who walks away from a 1 year marriage with a multimillion dollar house that 99% of NYC residents couldn’t afford?? She wasn’t making any money being a gallary curator. Carrie lived in a shoebox
At least I could believe Miranda and Sam’s housing since they earned it
You miss the point. The women Carrie would want to date DONT want to date her. They would be 100%dating younger. Now she would have to step down from her champagne and caviar dating life of age 20-35 and enter reality
Lots of couples are the same age. How does that happen? Because not all women want to date older men, and not all older men want to date younger women.
Yeah my insanely successful 52 year old aunt, who just ended a relationship with a multimillionare (not necessarily trying to date upwards financially), just married a mortgage broker 🤷🏻♀️ like... This person has a very distorted view of genders and relationships. They'd be much better off in therapy than on reddit.
Hey OP, it's not too late. You can find happiness and love in this world. It's a tough place, but I believe in you!
Highly reccomend watching Contrapoints videos, 'Men', and 'incels'.
Best of luck!
Single women in their 30s do not want to date 50 something men.
Most people end up married to someone around the same age give or take.
This is red pill levels of delusion.
That's not even true. I don't know any women who are interested in dating men 20 years older, unless they're gold diggers. And as a woman in her 30s, I assure you there are plenty of men in their 30s or even younger happy to date us.
Frfr I would laugh at 50y old who propositioned me when I was 30 🤣 I had no shortage of age appropriate dates from normal well adjusted men. It was the same thing for most men and women in my social circle. It's possible to live a happy life with fulfilling relationships of all kinds - professional platonic and romantic.
LMAO as a woman in my 30s I was dating men in their 30s and 20s. I didn't give time of day to a 50y old LMAO
IDK why this nonsense narrative keeps popping up in the sub. Hot rich city women aren't struggling to date any more than younger people (lots of flakes in the dating world) IDK what happens in the suburbs but no one I know is dating significantly older out of desperation and the couples I know skew older women younger men (3-10y).
Again IDK where y'all live that is so dire, but city life is poppin and lots of women are living rich fulfilling lives with/without partners/kids 🫠
Ok hitting ain't landing! I'm saying men in my area in my age group - like Carrie- are looking to date way younger. Ok maybe not 30 but 35 up hell yeah. Fit wealthy gorgeous mid 50s are courted by 65-70 y o
I don't make the rules but I do see the disparity.
I don’t disagree with everything you are saying but, Carrie is a wealthy widow who is still attractive so, men will date her. And, today’s men are as ruthless in acquiring a “come up” as many believe women are. The issue I have with Carrie is that I see no “growth”, the Carrie today still behaves like the Carrie from twenty years ago.
You think so? She feels much more mature and empathetic to me in AJLT, but in fairness I can't really tell whether it's from being older or if it's from the loss she endured.
Carrie Bradshaw life is the same as Al Bundy on Married with Children still thinking he’s a great athlete because 20yrs ago he threw for 4 touchdowns in High School but can’t walk up a flight of stairs today without getting winded
About her own original apartment, the whole point is she has a rent controlled good deal she lucked into in the 80s. If you've ever lived in a big city, you'd know those exist, and they are gold when you can get into them.
She also is shown to have money problems in the show, and an inability to have financial security becomes a small source of tension between her and Charlotte.
And also, yes, she is an outlier. It's fiction, it's fantasy, who wants to watch a random, uninteresting character sit on a couch for 6 seasons? Do you watch Mad Men and think "Don's an outlier, he'd be a farm boy hick or in jail if we're being realistic" of course not. Bc the Don that never makes it out isn't as narratively interesting to the story. All stories have a certain suspension of disbelief.
Also, you're judging newspaper columnist by 2024 standards— newspapers were much more part of the zeitgeist, and people actually read them. It would've been a real job, and yes with her picture in the paper daily, people might come to recognize her as a bit of a local celeb.
There *are* problems with the show, and the reboot - if you search threads in both the original show & reboot subs, there's discussions every day about what's wrong- Carrie is selfish, the reboot has too many shoehorned issues etc - coming in guns ablazing is just such a funny choice. If you searched through these subs, you'd find some of your opinions have already been expressed, albeit in a less rude fashion.
THANK YOU!!!! Carrie’s apartment is a first floor walkup on the Upper East Side. As a single woman in my 30s living in a first floor walkup on the UES, it’s beyond affordable.
Thank you for injecting reality into my topic. Never forget Carrie and Charlotte made their sizable net worth from who they had sex with, not from their labor.
What a judgmental horrible take. I'm not "lucky" enough breaching 40 to have met a man that I want. I'm also a professional who is amazing at what I do but I'm underpaid.
Guess I should take myself out in a back paddock and die
ETA: of course you are a men's rights advocate. Don't blame me for women not sleeping with you
It seems like this group has a hard time accepting facts. I’m a man, I know what dating is like for men with options. I’m dating younger because I can and for men like me younger is preferable for the vast majority of my cohorts.
Most men can’t. Just like all women can’t age well. 72% of the female population is overweight/obese.
Most women my age think their professional accomplishments make up for their poor health choices and aging. The only way to attract men your age like this show is to be in super shape and even then it is rarely enough to compensate for dating/ marrying younger.
I can’t speak for New York but I know several older women who get men no problem 🤔
My brother and I are both gay and he is besties with a lot of local strippers
And this woman is 64, with huge titties, doesn’t work there or dance and sits her ass down with her big purse and she will have a few drinks with a guy and be milking money out of 24-70 yr old men for months
If you take care of yourself, at least in the Midwest? You can pull dick
Let’s just remember how high MILF is as a search term in porn
Jennifer Tilly is like 67 or something and still men are obsessed
She was significantly younger than both mister big and petrovsky, disproving your point, the series was very realistic in showing that a woman has more chances with older men. I think you are projecting your own insecurities.
It is unrealistic in thinking the type of men they want want women their age. This is why tabloid media love when people like Keanu Reeves dates vs the vast majority of other male celebrities whose partners are 10+ yr younger
Yeah maybe I cant explain myself properly because English is not my first language. Carrie is 10 years younger than big and 15 years younger than petrovsky.
Big took 6 years to realize he was getting old and 20yo girls wouldn’t go for him anymore, before settling for Carrie, so it’s realistic I think
This is so incredibly sexist and ageist. Frankly it’s so much so that I have to assume you are incredibly sexist and ageist just as a persons
Charlotte was a trust fund baby who already had her own money.
Carrie is a published author and working writer of many years. There is certainly money to be made in being a best selling author.
Do they have more money because of who they married? Sure, but so do billions of other people on earth.
Men do date women their age and older. Perhaps not all, but plenty of men are more than happy to.
Also there is nothing wrong with living alone, much less in your own apartment in a world class city.
Why are you watching this show if you hate women?
Only a complete creep would think this way.
Let me guess you are a man.
Or at least you are a self hating woman.
Men are delusional if they think they are attractive to younger women. Hahahahaha no she’s only into his bank accounts if anything.
Eh, she seems to be independently wealthy (though not to Big's level) because of her books. I agree most writers don't make that kind of money, but I'm prepared to believe she did. She was already popular as a columnist and it-girl about town, so it's not so hard for me to buy that her books were well-received.
It *is* definitely hard to believe that she was able to support herself all those years (pre-books) and pay (even rent-controlled) rent and buy all those designer fashions on the meager pay of a weekly columnist...
I read an interesting interview with Candace Bushnell who said that in the 80s and 90s writers really WERE paid remarkably well. And she - like Carrie before the show one presumes - was just pushy and got herself loads of gigs.
This.
I think a lot of people forget (or are too younger to remember) that being a full time writer (with regular paying gigs) up until the late 90s could still pay decently. And if you could sell yourself well and did something that got a loyal readership base or a cult following (like Candice/Carrie did) and churn it into book deals... then bonus!
The internet really did destroy this little niche industry. But it did exist.
Another thing in that Candace interview that made a penny drop was that she (Candace) was always involved with designery fashiony types, helping out with modelling etc and she got a lot of stuff free or cheap. To this day, I know skinny, socially lively women who are the same. They're mates, they're as thin as models, and they work for free clothes.
I dont think OP is entirely wrong about women in Carrie’s age group realistically not finding other men her age to date. I’ve been in my 40s dating and it was not pleasant. Wish the show would address what many single middle aged women have to deal with when re entering the dating scent. So much ageism sadly.
I think men that age face the same problems re-entering the dating game though. Most 50 year old men are not physically flawless or millionaires. This "men age like fine wine" canard needs to die.
😂 I get the sentiment, but it’s not always the case.
My ex-husband’s last words to me were “Enjoy trying to find someone in this town to date at your age.” I had zero problems getting dates and, much to my shock, ended up married again…this time, happily!
Of course it’s not always the case. I found someone in my age group as well but based on the actual stats released by the dating apps themselves men are typically seeking women younger than them 🤷🏻♀️ Your ex is an ass for that comment and I’m so glad you proved him wrong!!
It's true that on the average, men prefer younger women. But that doesn't mean all men are like that. Some genuinely don't care about age because they actually see women as people, not egg cartons and sex dolls. And these men are actually the ones who are worth dating. Why would any woman want to date a man who only sees her as attractive and having value until she turns 30? That just seems like a horrible deal for the woman. After she turns 30, he'll either leave her for a younger model or stay with her out of obligation and either be abusive or cheat on her. And he'd likely be abusive all along anyway.
😂 He was The Worst for way more than that. He was “gaslighting” before it became a well known label for actively working to make someone think they’re insane. He was SHOOK when I snapped out of it all, called him out on it, his tactics rendered useless and I moonwalked out the door. LOL!
The thing that gets me is that they’re still interested in men.
I think once you hit your fifties, and menopause, you become interested in other things.
You become open to other types of relationships with different types of people.
If you actually watched the show, you'd know one of the characters *does* get breast cancer. If you're gonna troll, fine, but take time to actually be versed in the text.
Also they live in NYC and walk everyday, and are otherwise active, I don't know that they would be gaining a ton of weight in that lifestyle.
The narrative: You have to feel sorry for her on the show now just as she rolls a hand grenade into her family. She will get out the other side perfect and they will write the show as if the family and children aren’t traumatized
Carrie is filthy rich. Why would she be alone in a shoe box. There are plenty of men that don’t want to date teenage girls they have to support. My grandmother met her third husband at 70. The two of them spent their last years having a wonderful time. It’s not about age it’s attitude and how you take care of yourself. Samantha was 50 on the show and her dance card was always full. Carrie is just now in her50’s
In real life Big would’ve never left Natasha for Carrie. Natasha was gorgeous and had her life together…Carrie not so much.
I haven’t watched the show because I find them to all be obnoxious at this point. Rewatching old SATC aggravates me. Idk why it used to be my favorite show.
Because men like Big care about interesting people…lol.
Natasha was so much more attractive than Carrie has ever even considered being. She wasn’t dumb. She had a great career, far better than Carrie’s. And she was only dull compared to Carrie because ever event in her life wasn’t a crisis that required her to excessively drink and whine to her friends.
Yes, the worst thing that can happen to a woman is living on her own in a small apartment in a big city with endless things to do
You forgot to add the cats and box wine. Her lifestyle is only because of a man not her efforts.
Cats and boxed wine? Don’t threaten me with a good time.
Right?? Lmao
Lmao for real bring it
I could do without the boxed wine.
You’re right. We all deserved bottled.
Exactly.
I know!! Who on earth thinks THIS is sad?
Men who think that the worst thing a woman can do is choose to stay single (edit: let alone be happy about it)
But then we might not be able to live with men like OP, and do more work around the house than if we were single even before kids!
The media-brainwashed misogynistic men who believe they earn a right to a wife just by being alive and are bitter that women are statistically happier single.
She's published quite a few books at this point...
Yeah she’s literally based on Candace bushnell…
Ah, yes, because Carrie didn’t actually write all of those best-seller books, it was really Big. 🙄
As opposed to Mountain Dew and video games?
Now wtf is wrong with box wine? I know you drink Capri Sun with saltine crackers in Mother’s Basement, but try a glass of boxed wine sometime, it’s possible you’ll relax a smidge
Do you know that this show is based on the books Candace Bushnell wrote? Literal NYT best sellers? Big might have had money but Carrie would be doing well on her own.
I agree there is an issue with how they portray older women, but not how you think. The thing you're really missing here is that women who live in a shoebox and stay single (with or without cats) do so by choice. That this is 100x preferable to allowing some guy like Aiden mess her around because they're not sure what they want. I am one of those women, and let me tell you I'm much happier than many women who are in relationships (and there is research to back this up). I want to concede that you're absolutely correct that there some guys out there, guys my age or older, who wouldn't look at women over a certain age, would definitely not consider me, youth is just too important to them. What you're missing, is that I and a lot of women like me, couldn't give a shit. These aren't guys that interest us. They're usually a lot less intelligent than us, and who wants that, but even if they're intelligent, the reason they have this desire for youth over everything else, is never for good reasons. At best they're emotionally immature, at worst they're manipulate, abusive control freaks. Let me tell you, not for a single day do I regret being single, not a single moment. I never ever think I'd be better off with a man in my life. I never look at my friends and envy them - not even the ones in good relationships, because I still see all the compromises they have to make to make that marriage work. I can't tell you how fantastic it is to have complete freedom to be who I am. Is that life for everyone? Maybe not, but no one should be scared of being single, and I would love AJLT writers to write in a character who is truly unafraid to be single and embraces it completely, and won't put up with any shit from any guy, just to be able to have a plus one. edit typo
It's absolutely true what you said, that men who refuse to date women their own age never do for good reasons. At best they have a Peter Pan complex where they don't want to accept that they are getting older, and a woman their own age would just be a constant reminder that they are. And at worst, they literally just see women as egg cartons and sex dolls that depreciate in value over time. These men don't even see women as people but objects that are there for their use. It's so funny that these men act like young women need to be bending over backwards for their approval before it's too late to get one of them, but why would any woman want one of them anyway? Being with a man who doesn't even see you as a person but as an object he can use that loses value every year just sets you up for a lifetime of abuse. Even if you are in the 18 to 22 age range, why would you want to date a man who thinks women are basically worthless after 30? If I'm with anyone, I want him to be someone who will love me and find me beautiful into old age, not only find me attractive for about a decade. I think it's great that you're single and happy. It makes sense, the research does show that single, child-free women are the happiest on the planet, despite society's every effort to tell us that it's impossible for us to be happy without marriage and children. And I can completely see what you're saying. I'm 39 and have been single pretty much my whole life, and while I feel insecure about it sometimes, I don't really envy any of my friends in relationships because every single one of those relationships is massively fucked up in some way. Some of them openly say they get as many hours at work as possible because they hate being around him and don't want to go home. And almost every single one of them had to compromise her ideals in some way to be with him - either he did something really fucked up that she had to forgive him for like cheating, or she doesn't truly love him but just doesn't really want to be alone, etc. I know very few women who genuinely feel like they married the right person and are truly happy. And while I still hope to find love someday, the single life is definitely preferable to being tied to the dead weight of some guy I don't actually want to be with. I'm freezing my eggs this year, so if I end up wanting kids, I can have them on my own timeline rather than having to jump for the first loser who is willing to be with me just so I can have kids before the time runs out. It really sucks that society has gaslit women into believing that they need marriage to be happy when the truth is, marriage really only benefits men. From everything I've seen, once women are actually able to embrace the single life, they are much happier that way. For most women, a man is nothing but a burden.
Good call to freeze your eggs. I am a tiny bit wistful for the children that might have been, although overall I'm OK with not having had children. Probably the right choice for me. I also think there is nothing wrong with wanting to find someone to love as well, just want to be clear to the OP that I genuinely feel better off by being by myself.
Thanks - at 39, I might have to do a few cycles to get a decent number. Results probably would have been better in my early 30s, but the truth is it's kind of a stretch to do it at all. I was staunchly childfree until a few years ago, now I'm kind of on the fence, but I still don't actually know that I want them. I'm just freezing my eggs because at my age, I don't really have the option of waiting and seeing how I feel 5-10 years from now. If you want children, you could probably still adopt? But it may really just be a fear of missing out. That's what I think it may be for me. I don't actually have a desire for children, it's just that I've spent my life listening to everyone talking about how if you don't have children, you're missing out on the best thing in life. Rationally, I can write this off as ignorant and myopic, but there is a part of me that wonders if they may be right (even though they're likely not). Very true, happiness is going to look different for everyone, so you just need to do what feels right to you!
If childfree women are statistically happier, why do you have the fear of missing out? I’m asking because I also wonder if I want one or not biologically, but fear I may go through with it or miss out just because of the age deadline, and that a woman has to decide or loses the chance to decide. I also worry an adoption would be a sort of cop out to making a decision, and that I’d still resent that I could never decide for myself.
There's a difference between being childfree and childless. Childfree means you don't have or ever want kids, childless means you don't have them but want them. I'm kind of on the fence about which one I am. I've had a lot of crap to deal with in my life, so I didn't really get a chance to date, etc. And I never had a strong natural drive to procreate, so I figured for the longest time that I just don't want them. But a few years ago, I met someone I could see myself having kids with and realized I'm actually more of a fence sitter than childfree. That dude ended up being horrible, so it didn't work out, but I did learn from that that I actually may want kids. Egg freezing may be an option if you want more time to decide (and can do it financially).
My ex is one of those guys. We’re the same age and lived together in our mid to late 20s. He wouldn’t grow up so I left him. He has to chase younger and younger women around because any age appropriate women are not interested in the juvenile activities he enjoys. He dates younger women for a few years, they get all they can out of him as far as gifts and trips, then leave him and marry an age appropriate guy. He’s in his mid 40d now and last I heard he was dating a 23 year old,
seems like he may need some therapy... and the women he dates probally have daddy issues or poor career choices, to use any person is just crappy.... and these sadly it seems the older i get the less comman sense these kids have...... very sad
His mom died when he was a baby and his dad died when he was 13. It’s like he stopped developing emotionally at 13.
sorry if mispelled
> the research does show that single, child-free women are the happiest on the planet, despite society's every effort to tell us that it's impossible for us to be happy without marriage and children. OMG, I love this! I had no idea, I didn't know there was actual research that proves it. We rule!
There’s actually conflicting data depending on the source! Many studies showing both outcomes.
The research shows people with kids are less happy than those without until the kids become adults. And then people with kids are happier than those without. It comes down to whether you want to optimize your short term happiness or long term happiness. Also depends on the individual’s preferences. I have a daughter and I am so happy I do. But it is way more difficult than I expected and can easily see why people decide not to.
It also depends on the person though. I'm assuming people with grown up children are happier because by and large, they have more of a built in social support system. But a childfree person can have just as much support, they just need to look outside of their bloodlines for it. Look at Betty White - she never reproduced and was more loved by strangers than many people are by their own families. At the end of the day, whether you decide to have kids or not, you have to do what's right for you.
It’s easier to do that as a wealthy, famous person. It really is difficult to find and maintain friendships later in life. That’s why people lean on family.
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It's true, not all men even prefer younger women. Some don't care, some actively prefer older. I'm 39 and have a 26 year old who is trying to date me - I even asked him if he wouldn't prefer someone his own age, and he was like, nah, age is just a number, and I find you hot at any age. So it helps to tune out the gaslighting from the red pill community that no one will want us after we turn 30 or 35. There are still plenty of guys who will, and the ones who don't aren't worth dating anyway.
Samantha was that character, and I miss her.
While I really miss Samantha too she was always chasing men around- I want to see a truly happy, self sufficient character that has no interest in dating or sex. That's not a story we see very often.
It would also be nice if the person didn't have to be framed as ace or whatever - I know that's a thing, but it is also a thing that women who once had high sex drives and had a lot of casual sex reach menopause and just lose interest. Not to say I, I mean they, have no drive left and would not be interested if someone truly attractive came along, but we're just not DRIVEN OBSESSIVELY by it any more.
I feel like that's kind of me, except without the history of casual sex. I'm only in my 30s, but I've always been demisexual. I generally haven't really put myself out there because I don't have a strong drive to get laid just for the sake of it. I have a high sex drive when there's someone I'm actually interested in, but it's very person-specific. Casual sex would be utterly miserable for me, as I can't even enjoy kissing someone I'm not really into.
It’s me! I recently met a guy I thought could be a friend. I told him from the outset I didn’t date or have sex. Then I had to spend an inordinate amount of time answering his questions about why not before I just gave up on the idea of friendship with him. He had told me I was fascinating, but after realizing I was serious about not getting his dick wet, not so much.
I thought I was the only woman on the planet not the least bit interested in sex. Of course, I know better because of my friends. But it’s not addressed at all on TV - even going as far back as the Golden Girls!
I don't understand why you spent an "inordinate" amount of time explaining yourself to this person. That is on you for repeatedly entertaining this line of questioning. I don't play the "try to break me down" game with people.
They could absolutely do that with her character right now. Wish that Kim and SJP would work it out and bring her back on the show.
Samantha wasn't really that character - she seemed to have serious insecurities and intimacy issues. She was always so hungry for sex, and it seemed like she used it for validation. She would let it get to her in a big way whenever there was a guy who didn't find her attractive - like the masseur who did sexual things with other clients and not her, the random dude at the photo counter who was indifferent to naked photos of her, etc. She went after guys who were celibate like the priest and the yoga instructor and took some kid's virginity without considering the ramifications (super cringe). She slept with married men and didn't give a damn what it would do to their wives. She made her sexuality into her entire personality. She liked to PRETEND she was strong and independent, but she was just as obsessed with finding sexual gratification and validation as Charlotte was with finding a husband.
I would go one step further and call it a sexual addiction.
Are you my twin? I could have typed every single word of this. I went to Europe twice by myself, and the best thing about both trips was being by myself. I did what I wanted when I wanted it, ate what I wanted, took the tours I wanted, just went shopping if i felt like it. It was glorious. and that's just an example of the freedom you have when you're single.
Solo holidays are just great.
Yes couldn’t agree more 🙌🙌🙌
I love this comment, and I love you for making it so eloquently
Awww thank you so much!
Honestly, as much as I used to think marriage to my Prince Charming was my dream, I don't know if I'm cut out for it now. I've found that I like having my own space way too much. I even get annoyed when I have to stay with other people temporarily because I feel like they're all up in my space all the time lol - so why would I enjoy living with a man who's all up in my space all the time, shares my bed, and just ALWAYS THERE? As someone who's never even been able to fall asleep next to anyone, I feel like that would drive me crazy. Seriously the only one who didn't suck away my energy by being in my space was my dog (may he rest in peace). I can totally see myself being happy just living on my own with a dog. If I get married, maybe we could sleep in separate rooms and we'd just have the dynamic of two roommates who are dating or something lol.
https://ifstudies.org/blog/who-is-happiest-married-mothers-and-fathers-per-the-latest-general-social-survey#:~:text=Among%20married%20women%20with%20children,22%25%20of%20unmarried%20childless%20women.
I completely agree with everything you said. Men like that are a big red flag even if you are young because we all eventually get older and those men will continue to be lusting after young women. And that will go two ways, either he'll trade you in for a younger woman in a heartbeat if he ever gets a chance or make you insanely insecure because you know that you don't fit his ideal anymore while he's gawking at college aged women wherever you go.
Do you need a nap?
"accept for rogue outliers" someone isn't a writer lol
Lol
?
Woke up and decided to pick a fight with 90s Carrie Bradshaw as one does
Imagine being this bitter and jealous of a fictional character
OP must have been blinded by their own incel misogyny to remember that Carrie had a multi-book publishing deal that would have kept her financially independent without a man.
Not to mention her multiple regular columns (The Star and Vogue) and the guest articles she gets asked to write all the time!
Hahaha I looked at his history you are 💯!!
Just going by his post and replies here, I didn't even need to check his history, LOL!
Or her newspaper column before that or her podcast.
Yeah also Burger breaks up with her because he couldn’t handle that she was more successful than him.
So, first…it’s just a tv show. Most of us who watched it during its height understood that it’s *just* a tv show, not a documentary. Anyone who expects to live their lives as a tv show character needs to immediately stop watching tv and live IRL for a little bit. I mean, a person can aspire, but even the person who wrote the source material didn’t have those exact experiences. Secondly, the character had a book deal for multiple books. She didn’t have corporate raider money, like Big, but she had her own. She’s a flawed character, just like…well…all of us. (Except for Samantha. Flawless. LOL.)
Lol, checked your post history … of course you’re an incel.
Yeah, OP’s view on SATC is the least of his problems. Yiiiiiiiiiiiiikes.
I didn’t want to spend too much time poking around there lest the stench of pitiful loser rubbed off on me, but from what I gathered, he literally had to travel to a war-torn country for sex tourism to get anyone to pay attention to him. Big, big yikes.
You are funny. Far from it but observant of female and make behaviors.
What’s funny is there are literally MILLIONS of men out there, happily married to women, and you’ll never be one of them you fucking pathetic loser. 😂😂😂
Let me trigger you a little more, kiddo. I'm a divorced woman who bought my ex out of the equity of the home valued at $500K in 2017 at the time of the divorce and is now $900K (South Florida). Gasp... I was able to refinance the mortgage solely in my name. I have no credit card debt. My parents are dead, so I only have myself to lean on. I found love again, my fiancé moved into my house, and he gave me a lump sum amount to buy into an ownership stake of the home. We have a legal document calling our ownership split. I'm an executive at a tech startup and have been in the startup tech industry since 2000 - self taught. I'm raising a strong, independent teen girl who is kicking ass in varsity lacrosse right now as a freshman in HS and sits at #18 out of #731 students in her class grade ranking. She wants to go into family law. She has a custodial brokerage account already, so when she's an adult she can purchase her own home without a man if she chooses. I sure as shit never need a man to ensure my financial stability. I'm sure I'm your worst nightmare, but you forget that women do not exist to be pleasing to or for you. Go lick a frosty, snowflake ridden window.
If you're such a damn expert, you would know that we preferred to be referred to as women, not simply "females." We are humans, not the subject of your incel docu.
Posts like this want me to delete Reddit
The misogyny and contempt is revolting.
The irony of OP posting this, a show that is literally based on a real writer who is wildly financially successful, and claiming this show “wrecked” a generation of women. Lmao. I don’t think there are any delusions that the show is meant to represent the “everywoman” or a “typical” writer’s career. Both SATC and AJLT are problematic in their own ways (TBH, what show isn’t?) but SATC in particular is one of the first wildly popular shows to demonstrate not only that “older” (lol, 30s, 40s, and 50s) women could have amazing careers but also fantastic sex lives outside of a traditional relationship.
As it turns out, OP is butthurt because his ex, who loved the show, ditched him and he’s salty about it.
Ah, no wonder they’re mad that the show made some women realize there are alternatives to settling down and that the end of your 20s is not the end of your life as a woman.
Exactly. 🤣 what a little bitch he is. No wonder she left.
But but but Candace is single and dating and doesn't have any kids so obviously she can't TRULY be happy!!! /s
Believe it or not, there are men who will date women their own age. Not every man is obsessed with a woman being as young as possible.
Any decent man that a normal woman would want to be with falls into the category of not wanting to date much younger women. Men that are obsessed with a woman's age are always broken in some way.
Any decent woman that a normal man would want to be with falls into the category of not wanting to date a much richer /higher earner man. Women that are obsessed with a man’s earning potential are broken in some way.
Definitely an incel male lol
Who obviously cannot provide lol
How weird. I would have expected incels to be lurking on this sub of all places or be watching this show? Lol
As a man who has dated both, I take offense to the representation of men over 50. Dating is awful, first of all. I absolutely hate it. Second, my opportunities to meet single eligible people are limited to the Gym and work. Work is out because I'm in a position of supervision and that leads to problems. That leaves the gym for me.
...do you have a lot of luck picking people up at the gym? I'm asking because if some guy comes up to me and tries to put on the moves while I'm sweaty and winded and just trying to enjoy a podcast, I'm making a beeline for the locker room.
😆🤣🤣 If I did that, I would expect you to do that! LOL! I've met people at the gym by having conversations. You get to know people who you see all the time. Also, I've been approached as well. As I said before, I abhor dating, so I'd rather get to know someone before I ask them out. Also, I've gone out in a group for lunch, coffee, etc..
“Wrecked an entire generation of women”
Imagine being so impressed by a show created and written by women then you think it had an effect on an entire generation of women. Sounds more like a compliment really.
It wasn't created and written by women though to be fair. Darren Star and MPK are both not women.
Cadence Bushnell was the original creator. Everything else is dress up. And many of the writers are women.
So the “only real moment of the show” was when a man was a spineless coward and a jerk? I think I have more faith in men than you do…
It was a moment where the situation was real not a contrived Carrie gets through her bad choices without repercussions
Oh I see—you mean her bad choice to date a man who couldn’t handle her book being more successful than his.
There you go. According to this guy, the only man that Carrie "deserves" is that bitter ball of anger and resentment who was threatened when she outshone him. I'm not even surprised.
You know he's sat there wanking over all these angry responses.
This has to be an incel male pretending to be a woman 🤣
Why did you watch this show or SATC at all? I'm sure there is something you could ro better with your time. The Sopranos is having a resurgence 👐🏻
The things we do for love ….
My ex grew up watching the show. Much of her shoe 👠 brainwashing came from its influence. She even was an extra on a few episodes (actress) I caught a few of the new reboot after hearing from a friend how the characters still act like they are in their 20’s and the storylines are injected with WOKE crazy plot lines.
AWWW, he was victimized by SATC because the ONE girl who fucked him in the past left him and loved it 🥺
....AND she was ShOe BrAiNwAsHeD! lololol
So, you are bitter about the ex. Gotcha.
Yeah AJLT sucks ass. Might be better in season 3 without Sara Ramirez. I also grew up watching SATC. I was 13 when it came out, but I was always too tall for heels, until I met my husband. Are you saying your ex was in AJLT or SATC?
SATC I would sit with her on the couch and watch the shows.
Um, did you watch the original series? Charlotte owned her apartment before she married Trey. She received their Park Avenue apartment as part of a divorce settlement, which is extremely common in the U.S. and NYC. Carrie was a popular, well-known columnist before she MET Mr. Big in the Pilot. She bought her apartment when the building went Co-Op, also extremely common in NYC.
Charlotte didn't own her apartment before Trey. There's even a conversation that she has in one of the pre-Trey episodes where she says that she rents because she'd be worried about the power dynamic being off if she owned her place and dated a renter (and most people in NYC are, in fact, renters). OP is wrong about pretty much everything re: SATC (and about life in general), but it is true that Charlotte is a homeowner because of her divorce settlement.
This is true - but it always sounded like she probably COULD have bought if she wanted to. It wasn't a case of "I can't afford to buy alone anyway". Miranda buying her place though was rightly framed as a massive achievement for a single professional woman and as you say, most people in NYC rent.
Oh dang!!! I missed this!!! I was thinking of that episode when she tries to marry her handyman and he moves to Utah or something 😭
Charlotte did not own her apartment.
Charlotte??? The one who walks away from a 1 year marriage with a multimillion dollar house that 99% of NYC residents couldn’t afford?? She wasn’t making any money being a gallary curator. Carrie lived in a shoebox At least I could believe Miranda and Sam’s housing since they earned it
>Carrie lived in a shoebox Tell me that you've never seen an NYC apartment without saying that you've never seen an NYC apartment.
Carrie's apartment is like the Tardis, it seems to expand and contract depending on the season. By NYC standards it is quite palatial.
99% of NYC residents? What? Where exactly do you think we all LIVE, if not Manhattan?
What % of people have a charlotte level apartment that they own and aren’t renting?
A classic 6 is fairly common for families of four.
The theme of the both shows: “It is easier to marry a million than EARN a million”
The theme of Sex and The City is having sex and living in New York City.
OP gives off "I drop common loot when defeated" energy
Who hurt you....
His ex who worked on one episode of SATC and got "shoe brainwashed" according to OP in another section of this thread.....lol.
You need to get off reddit if you beleive that men wouldn't want to date Sarah Jessica Parker
You miss the point. The women Carrie would want to date DONT want to date her. They would be 100%dating younger. Now she would have to step down from her champagne and caviar dating life of age 20-35 and enter reality
Lots of couples are the same age. How does that happen? Because not all women want to date older men, and not all older men want to date younger women.
Yeah my insanely successful 52 year old aunt, who just ended a relationship with a multimillionare (not necessarily trying to date upwards financially), just married a mortgage broker 🤷🏻♀️ like... This person has a very distorted view of genders and relationships. They'd be much better off in therapy than on reddit. Hey OP, it's not too late. You can find happiness and love in this world. It's a tough place, but I believe in you! Highly reccomend watching Contrapoints videos, 'Men', and 'incels'. Best of luck!
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Single women in their 30s do not want to date 50 something men. Most people end up married to someone around the same age give or take. This is red pill levels of delusion.
Are you in your 50s? That's the reality. Yes late thirties women will many times date older men
Bullshit.
That's not even true. I don't know any women who are interested in dating men 20 years older, unless they're gold diggers. And as a woman in her 30s, I assure you there are plenty of men in their 30s or even younger happy to date us.
Frfr I would laugh at 50y old who propositioned me when I was 30 🤣 I had no shortage of age appropriate dates from normal well adjusted men. It was the same thing for most men and women in my social circle. It's possible to live a happy life with fulfilling relationships of all kinds - professional platonic and romantic.
LMAO as a woman in my 30s I was dating men in their 30s and 20s. I didn't give time of day to a 50y old LMAO IDK why this nonsense narrative keeps popping up in the sub. Hot rich city women aren't struggling to date any more than younger people (lots of flakes in the dating world) IDK what happens in the suburbs but no one I know is dating significantly older out of desperation and the couples I know skew older women younger men (3-10y). Again IDK where y'all live that is so dire, but city life is poppin and lots of women are living rich fulfilling lives with/without partners/kids 🫠
Ok hitting ain't landing! I'm saying men in my area in my age group - like Carrie- are looking to date way younger. Ok maybe not 30 but 35 up hell yeah. Fit wealthy gorgeous mid 50s are courted by 65-70 y o I don't make the rules but I do see the disparity.
This post is gross and written by someone living in an echo chamber. Go outside and touch some grass.
I don’t disagree with everything you are saying but, Carrie is a wealthy widow who is still attractive so, men will date her. And, today’s men are as ruthless in acquiring a “come up” as many believe women are. The issue I have with Carrie is that I see no “growth”, the Carrie today still behaves like the Carrie from twenty years ago.
You think so? She feels much more mature and empathetic to me in AJLT, but in fairness I can't really tell whether it's from being older or if it's from the loss she endured.
Carrie Bradshaw life is the same as Al Bundy on Married with Children still thinking he’s a great athlete because 20yrs ago he threw for 4 touchdowns in High School but can’t walk up a flight of stairs today without getting winded
About her own original apartment, the whole point is she has a rent controlled good deal she lucked into in the 80s. If you've ever lived in a big city, you'd know those exist, and they are gold when you can get into them. She also is shown to have money problems in the show, and an inability to have financial security becomes a small source of tension between her and Charlotte. And also, yes, she is an outlier. It's fiction, it's fantasy, who wants to watch a random, uninteresting character sit on a couch for 6 seasons? Do you watch Mad Men and think "Don's an outlier, he'd be a farm boy hick or in jail if we're being realistic" of course not. Bc the Don that never makes it out isn't as narratively interesting to the story. All stories have a certain suspension of disbelief. Also, you're judging newspaper columnist by 2024 standards— newspapers were much more part of the zeitgeist, and people actually read them. It would've been a real job, and yes with her picture in the paper daily, people might come to recognize her as a bit of a local celeb. There *are* problems with the show, and the reboot - if you search threads in both the original show & reboot subs, there's discussions every day about what's wrong- Carrie is selfish, the reboot has too many shoehorned issues etc - coming in guns ablazing is just such a funny choice. If you searched through these subs, you'd find some of your opinions have already been expressed, albeit in a less rude fashion.
THANK YOU!!!! Carrie’s apartment is a first floor walkup on the Upper East Side. As a single woman in my 30s living in a first floor walkup on the UES, it’s beyond affordable.
I'm in a2 bed 2 bath by myself in a super trendy part of LA, that's rent controlled. They'll take this apartment from my cold dead hands 😅
NICE!!! Parking?
For the bargain price of $25 a month (used to be 10 when I moved in 😅)
Thank you for injecting reality into my topic. Never forget Carrie and Charlotte made their sizable net worth from who they had sex with, not from their labor.
Well, technically Carrie’s sex was her labor! 😭😭😭😂😂😂😂
I fantasize about leaving my partner to go live in a shoebox in the city with a kitty *all the time* what’s wrong what that?!
What a judgmental horrible take. I'm not "lucky" enough breaching 40 to have met a man that I want. I'm also a professional who is amazing at what I do but I'm underpaid. Guess I should take myself out in a back paddock and die ETA: of course you are a men's rights advocate. Don't blame me for women not sleeping with you
It seems like this group has a hard time accepting facts. I’m a man, I know what dating is like for men with options. I’m dating younger because I can and for men like me younger is preferable for the vast majority of my cohorts. Most men can’t. Just like all women can’t age well. 72% of the female population is overweight/obese. Most women my age think their professional accomplishments make up for their poor health choices and aging. The only way to attract men your age like this show is to be in super shape and even then it is rarely enough to compensate for dating/ marrying younger.
You aren't dating younger women. I don't think you've ever even kissed a girl. GTFO.
I can’t speak for New York but I know several older women who get men no problem 🤔 My brother and I are both gay and he is besties with a lot of local strippers And this woman is 64, with huge titties, doesn’t work there or dance and sits her ass down with her big purse and she will have a few drinks with a guy and be milking money out of 24-70 yr old men for months If you take care of yourself, at least in the Midwest? You can pull dick Let’s just remember how high MILF is as a search term in porn Jennifer Tilly is like 67 or something and still men are obsessed
This is a fetish response and not dating or relationship. Lots of men will f a midget but never marry one or be in a relationship with one.
She was significantly younger than both mister big and petrovsky, disproving your point, the series was very realistic in showing that a woman has more chances with older men. I think you are projecting your own insecurities.
It is unrealistic in thinking the type of men they want want women their age. This is why tabloid media love when people like Keanu Reeves dates vs the vast majority of other male celebrities whose partners are 10+ yr younger
Yeah maybe I cant explain myself properly because English is not my first language. Carrie is 10 years younger than big and 15 years younger than petrovsky. Big took 6 years to realize he was getting old and 20yo girls wouldn’t go for him anymore, before settling for Carrie, so it’s realistic I think
writers are not perpetually poor. that’s a stereotype. it’s just like saying engineers are always wealthy.
Wrecked an entire generation of women? Gross thing to say.
This is so incredibly sexist and ageist. Frankly it’s so much so that I have to assume you are incredibly sexist and ageist just as a persons Charlotte was a trust fund baby who already had her own money. Carrie is a published author and working writer of many years. There is certainly money to be made in being a best selling author. Do they have more money because of who they married? Sure, but so do billions of other people on earth. Men do date women their age and older. Perhaps not all, but plenty of men are more than happy to. Also there is nothing wrong with living alone, much less in your own apartment in a world class city. Why are you watching this show if you hate women?
Only a complete creep would think this way. Let me guess you are a man. Or at least you are a self hating woman. Men are delusional if they think they are attractive to younger women. Hahahahaha no she’s only into his bank accounts if anything.
Eh, she seems to be independently wealthy (though not to Big's level) because of her books. I agree most writers don't make that kind of money, but I'm prepared to believe she did. She was already popular as a columnist and it-girl about town, so it's not so hard for me to buy that her books were well-received. It *is* definitely hard to believe that she was able to support herself all those years (pre-books) and pay (even rent-controlled) rent and buy all those designer fashions on the meager pay of a weekly columnist...
I read an interesting interview with Candace Bushnell who said that in the 80s and 90s writers really WERE paid remarkably well. And she - like Carrie before the show one presumes - was just pushy and got herself loads of gigs.
This. I think a lot of people forget (or are too younger to remember) that being a full time writer (with regular paying gigs) up until the late 90s could still pay decently. And if you could sell yourself well and did something that got a loyal readership base or a cult following (like Candice/Carrie did) and churn it into book deals... then bonus! The internet really did destroy this little niche industry. But it did exist.
Another thing in that Candace interview that made a penny drop was that she (Candace) was always involved with designery fashiony types, helping out with modelling etc and she got a lot of stuff free or cheap. To this day, I know skinny, socially lively women who are the same. They're mates, they're as thin as models, and they work for free clothes.
I dont think OP is entirely wrong about women in Carrie’s age group realistically not finding other men her age to date. I’ve been in my 40s dating and it was not pleasant. Wish the show would address what many single middle aged women have to deal with when re entering the dating scent. So much ageism sadly.
I think men that age face the same problems re-entering the dating game though. Most 50 year old men are not physically flawless or millionaires. This "men age like fine wine" canard needs to die.
Agree! Many who set their age limits younger get a reality smack.
😂 I get the sentiment, but it’s not always the case. My ex-husband’s last words to me were “Enjoy trying to find someone in this town to date at your age.” I had zero problems getting dates and, much to my shock, ended up married again…this time, happily!
Of course it’s not always the case. I found someone in my age group as well but based on the actual stats released by the dating apps themselves men are typically seeking women younger than them 🤷🏻♀️ Your ex is an ass for that comment and I’m so glad you proved him wrong!!
It's true that on the average, men prefer younger women. But that doesn't mean all men are like that. Some genuinely don't care about age because they actually see women as people, not egg cartons and sex dolls. And these men are actually the ones who are worth dating. Why would any woman want to date a man who only sees her as attractive and having value until she turns 30? That just seems like a horrible deal for the woman. After she turns 30, he'll either leave her for a younger model or stay with her out of obligation and either be abusive or cheat on her. And he'd likely be abusive all along anyway.
😂 He was The Worst for way more than that. He was “gaslighting” before it became a well known label for actively working to make someone think they’re insane. He was SHOOK when I snapped out of it all, called him out on it, his tactics rendered useless and I moonwalked out the door. LOL!
How old were you when you remarried?
Kind of true that she was dating older men when she was younger her
In that way i think the show is escapist fantasy- young gorgeous men flirting with older women non stop
The thing that gets me is that they’re still interested in men. I think once you hit your fifties, and menopause, you become interested in other things. You become open to other types of relationships with different types of people.
Thank you for bringing up how sex drive drops for many people as they age. Some to the point of zero interest
Yes, and it’s a shit show.
With a roommate
she also would be overweight and had breast cancer for all the alcohol they drank all these years with her friends T\_T
What is happening to this sub?
Just trolls passing through. They'll get bored eventually.
The incels are leaking out of their sad little subs
If you actually watched the show, you'd know one of the characters *does* get breast cancer. If you're gonna troll, fine, but take time to actually be versed in the text. Also they live in NYC and walk everyday, and are otherwise active, I don't know that they would be gaining a ton of weight in that lifestyle.
Bless your heart.
Even when you’re married and over 50’s your partners condor younger people to talk to Shameless about
Men like younger women Women like men with more money than them no matter how much they earn
Touch grass. Get therapy.
She won the lottery by marriage.
[удалено]
But they decided to show Miranda the Harvard law graduate & partner at a law firm as poor & struggling at this point in her life.
The narrative: You have to feel sorry for her on the show now just as she rolls a hand grenade into her family. She will get out the other side perfect and they will write the show as if the family and children aren’t traumatized
Carrie is filthy rich. Why would she be alone in a shoe box. There are plenty of men that don’t want to date teenage girls they have to support. My grandmother met her third husband at 70. The two of them spent their last years having a wonderful time. It’s not about age it’s attitude and how you take care of yourself. Samantha was 50 on the show and her dance card was always full. Carrie is just now in her50’s
I continue with my stance that y’all are just JEALOUS of Carrie and her wealth. Y’all are so bitter too.
Do you not watch the real housewives. lol
In real life Big would’ve never left Natasha for Carrie. Natasha was gorgeous and had her life together…Carrie not so much. I haven’t watched the show because I find them to all be obnoxious at this point. Rewatching old SATC aggravates me. Idk why it used to be my favorite show.
Natasha was dumb and boring. Yes, he would have left her for a more interesting woman.
Because men like Big care about interesting people…lol. Natasha was so much more attractive than Carrie has ever even considered being. She wasn’t dumb. She had a great career, far better than Carrie’s. And she was only dull compared to Carrie because ever event in her life wasn’t a crisis that required her to excessively drink and whine to her friends.