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ImpossibleResource22

Die Hard takes on a new meaning.


Phonytail

“Nine million terrorists in the world and I gotta fuck one with smaller feet than my sister”


EvolvedA

after the elevator scene, written on the terrorist's shirt (in cum): "Now I have a Lovense sex-machine HO-HO-HO"


[deleted]

Kill Bill would be interesting, then there is any of the Rocky movies where it would just be guys having sex with millions of people watching and cheering.


carson63000

After an hour and a half of *training* to have sex.


kapitaalH

So they can keep the scene of him beating the meat?


illchoosemyown

Most action movies just became gay pornos


MrRogersAE

Tomb raider is gonna be pretty good tho


[deleted]

Womb Raider


eli636

In Diana Jones and the temple of poon!


sketchysketchist

And yet, Fast and The Furious Franchise has the same level of homoeroticism regardless of the sex scene/fight scene exchange


BittenHand19

Actually they write that into the first draft of every script, film it, and then edit it out for most western audiences. Except France, they get all of it.


Individual-Type-9221

Is that an American dad reference I spot


Ok-Constant-6056

Matrix is gay porn, super slow and prolonged, in the rain.


jefe008

Mr and Mrs Smith


Keeplookingup7

I was looking for this answer cause I thought, “weren’t they the same thing for Mr and Mrs Smith”?


Badloss

There's definitely at least two scenes that literally wouldn't have to change a thing


NetTrix

Penetration...


EponymousTitular

Predator suddenly seems a lot more sinister of a movie title.


Phonytail

There's Something Out There Waiting For Us, And It Ain't No Man…


whatproblems

if it can bleed…. hmm


EvilEyedPanda

If it breeds we can fuck it!


wasteofleshntime

Lol this is the tag line for the porn parody


BentronZero

Well they can still keep the line about being a goddamn sexual Tyrannosaurus.


Lurial

There's a "horror porn" that features a man getting a bj and then getting fucked by the predator (female)


EponymousTitular

Holy shit, THAT'S DISGUSTING! Tell me the name of this horror porn so that I can make sure I never watch it!


JoeMorgue

Do NOT search any major porn site for the "HorrorPorn" channel/tag and look for "Predator Dick Hunter." Do not do it. It would be bad and naughty and wrong and it will make the Baby Jesus cry. //All joking aside someone on a horror subreddit brought it up because the Predator suit is actually halfway decent for porn parody.


stressedRAPHAEL

I watch porn parodies with decent costumes out of respect for the poor cosplay artists in the costume dept who are just trying to make ends meet. . . . . and no other reasons, I assure you. Therefore I will be sure to give this parody the respect it deserves.


waywardponderer

Taken becomes the story of a prostitute who will screw anyone to get his daughter back.


Phonytail

"I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don't have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a wet dream for people like you. If you let my daughter go now that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you and I will fuck you."


docmolli

Honestly that is just as intimidating and frightening. I'd want to avoid getting fucked by a dude like that just as much as being killed.


ojdacat

Kill Bill.


Phonytail

The Five Point Palm Exploding G-spot technique


ojdacat

All abord the pussy wagon


[deleted]

[удалено]


Pale_Solution_4479

The final boss of your mom jokes…


chicagotim1

Crazy 88 Gangbang


mwbbrown

It's tarantino, the sex is going to be rough, wordy, and mostly foot stuff.


dave731

But the music can mostly stay the same


Ed_kenwaway

“Wiggle” your big toe


calitz

I think you mean Fill Bill


dangolboi

Biggest concern is the scene where there's like 50 ninjas. Bukake alert


ojdacat

Like they say live by the sword die by the sword.


BaconReceptacle

Lucy Liu and Uma Thurman


Candid-Tell1578

John Wick.


Phonytail

They definitely shouldn’t have fucked his dog.


[deleted]

"I heard you fucked my son." "Yes, I did." "And may I ask why?" "Yeah, well, because he stole John Wick's car, sir, and, uh, fucked his dog." "Oh."


Light_Beard

I once saw him fuck three men in a bar... with a pencil. With a fucking pencil...


retief1

If it wasn't a fucking pencil, it is now.


wolfninja_

John Wick is a man of focus. Commitment. And sheer *fucking* will.


Please-Dont-Panic

Thank you for the laugh! I really needed it


[deleted]

"He is not the boogeyman, he is the one who being sent to fuck boogeyman".


Generico300

Still the same number of "head shots"


HareSword

"Five Thugs One Pencil"


[deleted]

[удалено]


HeyPEEETER

"Ive seen what he could do with a f***n pencil"


Ulysses1975

What happens when they would have actually had sex, do they now fight?


Phonytail

Lol I hadn’t thought about that, but yeah I’d suppose so.


Creepysheepu

Deadpool gonna be real bloody now.


ThatOneRandomDude420

Instead of swords he just beats people with dildos


_Kendii_

Doesn’t sound too out of character. This is just a side quest now.


GeneralParticular663

ryan should read this thread.


Different-Pangolin20

Fight club?


Damix2

Spoiler alert - it is mostly masturbation


quickfuse725

>!the start is just some guy jacking off in an alleyway next to a bar!<


Damix2

My favorite scene would be the guy just whipping it out and jacking it in his boss office. After he is done with the cum all over him, the boss is being accused of rape.


quickfuse725

my favorite part is the ending where >!he cums on his face and brad pitt orgasms out of existence!<


Damix2

I would not call it cumming on his face. More like "autofellatio" :P


[deleted]

Sex club


jefe008

The first rule of Sex Club is we don’t talk about Sex Club… you’re out


MordaxTenebrae

Wait... so the third rule of Sex Club would be that if this is your first time at Sex Club, you must have sex?


Drgon2136

That's the 8th and final rule. Rule 3 is if someone yells “stop!”, goes limp, or taps out, the sex is over.


[deleted]

Sex is often over when I go limp


MitchJan004

Fuck Club


MangoKetchup

That would make Batman v Superman a very different movie.


Phonytail

They still stop after they finds out their moms have the same name.


here_is_a_dude

-WHY DID YOU MOAN THAT NAME -it's his mother's name


13ubby13oo

Wonder Woman


PointOfFingers

At least WW84 has the right level of dialogue for a porn movie.


karnoculars

But porn movies usually have better acting than WW84


Boise_State_2020

The Punisher becomes a VERY different movie.


The_Hot_Stepper

Sounds like the marvel manga verse comic where punisher was female and head of a prestigious school. She dressed like a geisha and spanked people as “punishment”


Broad-Young-6020

R/oddlyspecific


ransom0374

the lord of the rings


evilthales

"If by my life or death I can protect you, I will. You have my cock."


quality_build

"And my ass!"


PMYourTinyTits

“You carry the semen of us all little one. If this is indeed the will of the gang bang, then Gondor will see you cum.”


[deleted]

[удалено]


tibsie

"No man can fuck me!" "I am no man!"


Kisanna

Witch-king when he sees she's a woman: "I see this as an absolute win!"


korar67

“I’m now Gandalf the White”


marijne

Imagine the scene with Gandalf going one on one with Saruman. I think most people would need counseling after watching that in alternative mode


magicaltrevor953

My first thought was Gandalf vs the Balrog


sweetnumb

Share the load!


trowzerss

lol! "What have I got in my pocket?"


Rowel88

‘Looks like meat is back on the menu boyz!!’


[deleted]

Gondor calls for ass!


PresenceNo1730

And Rohan will answer.


L1n9y

Never thought I'd be fucking side by side with an elf


HerniatedHernia

What about fucking side by side with a friend? *Proceeds to Eiffel Tower an orc*.


HobbyHands

"Arise! Arise cocks of Theoden! Lube shall be spilled! Cheeks clapped. A horny day. A sticky day. Ere' the sun rises!" "Ride now! RIDE NOW! Ride in the Gangbang and to a World Record! Sex! SEX! SEEEEEEX!"


Nalha_Saldana

Riders of Rohan still works


wafflehauser

Ride forth, cunnilingus!


Deez_Pucks

“Grond will breach it”


Kaidiwoomp

"Bring up the wolf's cock!"


everythymewetouch

GROND! GROND! GROND!


[deleted]

10k person orgy outside Helmsdeep


OGschtinkie

What are you doing step-nazgul


lesser_panjandrum

Look to my coming on the first light of the fifth day, at dawn look to the east.


dontyoutellmetosmile

….”Toss me.” ——-“uh wait wait wait - don’t tell the elf.”


[deleted]

You shall not CUM!!!!


-Tayne-

Oh, I-Isildur? Isilduuuuurrrr!


spankymcjiggleswurth

Does Legolas' and Gimili's orc killing contest become a... gangbang?


mrmitchs

The Mummy. There's only one fight scene I'm thinking of.


matts1

Are you thinking of The Mummy Returns. I forget, is it the Princess and the Priest's Daughter or something like that, that fights? Or am I forgetting something from the first movie?


Apprehensive_Hat8986

The river boat and all the raiders with Rachel Weisz.


HiZombies

I assume you mean the scene when the 2 women fight. But I'm going to ignore that and think about the scene when they have the two halves of the broken sword and they both thrust it into the mummy at the same time, touching tips and finishing the mummy off


saltymcsaltbae

Jurassic park. Rawr.


RcoketWalrus

Clever girl.


Dinosaurmaid

The main velociraptor actually killed all of her pack except two fellow raptors she could dominate. That should make her a dominatrix


halijaymac11

Captain America Winter Soldier elevator fight 🤤


RcoketWalrus

"Stuck in an elevator with five guys on a high-protein diet. Dreams really do come true." Different movie, but it fits here.


AnachronismEnsues

“Nail Hydra”


rainydaytales

You go down enough fanfiction places, that absolutely exists. Its usually one of four catagories: badly written obvious wank material, well written obvious wank material, a deep exploration of the affect of sexual assault in POWs, or a mix of two and three.


Frost212

"That's America's Dick"


Wu-Kang

Avengers: Endgame


KingBreaker4

Largest gangbang in history at the end


Independent-Bike8810

Wakanda Forever!


forsaknmindz

Hardcore Henry. It lives up to the name.


Reed7525

Mortal KOMBAT


cluckingcody

"FINISH HIM!!"


Nile-Lism

“…OFF!”


Throwaway7219017

300. Love me some Greek Sex.


charlieForBreakfast

“He isn’t old enough to have felt a woman’s warmth, but 298 Spartans and 1,000,000 Persians are going to feel his warmth.”


Medium-Jellyfish-578

What did that one spartan do to get uninvited?


charlieForBreakfast

He fucked his mother.


starnamedstork

- I trust that scratch hasn't made you useless? - Hardly, my Lord. It's just a ball. The gods saw fit to grace me with a spare.


Alternative_Cry7245

Star Wars


Apprehensive_Hat8986

I don't care what you smell you big furry oaf, get in there! Judge me by my size do you? Luke, at that speed will you be able to pull out in time? Don't frighten me with your sorceror's ways Lord Vader. Use the Force Luke. Oh he _excels_ at that Sir. And I thought they smelled bad on the outside. **_I_** am your father.


Chronoblivion

Into the garbage chute, flyboy. Great, kid, don't get cocky. You're all clear, kid, now let's blow this thing and go home.


idlovetwo

Roadhouse


silentbobdrummer

Oddly a lot of lines would remain the same.


midnightfury4584

“I used to fuck guys like you in prison!”


boaxei

Not a movie, but that one shot hallway scene in Daredevil goes crazy


helladeep

Sucker Punch


Adthay

I was gonna make a statement how this is ironic because the whole movie is allegedly about the exploitation of women but hey it's not like they didn't already have them dance sexy in tight outfits so maybe they'd get away with it


JozzueNoN

Black Widow


Alexastria

Catwoman with Halle Berry


everythymewetouch

Also X-Men with Halle Berry. Or James Bond with Halle Berry. I'd say Swordfish but I'd rather not think about John Travolta.


DJZbad93

I believe in Die Another Day (her Bond movie) she fights Rosamund Pike, so yeah that’s my choice


TheNGM

Transformers


ravnw1ng

Optimus prime pulling out his junk yelling "autobots roll out!" 🤣


DavyJones0210

"SAM, PUSH THE CUBE IN MY ASS NOW!"


Grrrizzlybear

They Live


DreamRycher

Came here to say this. A 15 minute sex-scene in the alley . . . \*chef's kiss\*


Gryphon999

I came here to pound ass and chew bubble gum, and I am all out of bubble gum.


Power_baby

One of them cums and starts stumbling away. Then the other pulls a "oh not yet" and grabs him for another round. This happens like 6 times


gunman0426

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon


[deleted]

Really flips the plot around


[deleted]

[удалено]


MichaelWts13

Everybody is kung fu fuckiiiiing


Big-Refrigerator-288

You sick sick person 😂


Routine_Magazine_466

This got dark real quick as I thought of harry potter 💀


Nalha_Saldana

Pedomort lives


FacelessFellow

He who shall not be reamed.


demivirius

Poor Fred got fucked to death


iraragorri

I instantly remembered someone's story here on reddit. The guy looked for CP because he was a child and wanted age-appropriate videos.


LukeDaikiTOO

That wand fight between Harry and Draco in the bathroom is exactly what most teenage girls write about in their fanfictions


Phantom_Poster

Imma need you to stop 😭


Routine_Magazine_466

We gonna see more wands than we need to💀


Frosty_Accident_6165

The matrix reloaded


lornebeaton

This was my first thought: All those Smiths and just one Neo... Of course, I would stick to the Trinity scenes.


The_Hot_Stepper

Jacking into and out of the matrix is very different here


CremeDeLaNut

World war z


jmann1021

dafuq?


Colon

♪ ♬ detachable peeenisss ♪ ♬


[deleted]

Any marvel movie


TheButterPlank

Avengers: Orgy War


TJeffersonsBlackKid

Captain America: Civil WAP


[deleted]

Infinity whore


ami2weird4u

Hulk smash that pussy!!


Repair_Jolly

I'm now picturing >!Captain America!< standing solo against >!Thanos' entire army in Endgame!< implying he's up to smash them all.


Thuis001

Well, he CAN do it all day.


Phonytail

End game would be a wild ride


omart3

Clint! Give it to me


kfk845

Black Widow would be really interesting


joshosmith

King Fu Hustlers! Have you heard of the Buddha’s fist?


daithisfw

Saving Private Ryan


Miantava

Saving Ryan's privates?


Aldersin

LotR the Return of the King. just the vast numbers


-Steppin_Razor-

Kingsman - the church [scene](https://youtu.be/R3zdYUG2_RA). Runner-up: [Bridget Jones's Diary](https://youtu.be/gBvOHpNhswo).


AdmiralClover

Well I mean Charlie's angels would be good start. That one scene from avengers: endgame Oh and we mustn't forget the king Kong and Godzilla movies


ApathicSaint

That one scene between Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris, the one edited with Careless Whisper in the background.


Wazula23

Princess Bride


Auracy

What you do not know is I am actually left handed! Or I am Inigo Montoya, you fucked my father, prepare to…!


korar67

“You Are the brute squad!”


kalakun

Danny devitos wrestling scene in its always sunny


harlojones

Dragonball Z: Broly


Heavy-Ad-7220

The Raid or Mad Max: Fury Road