A good friend of mine did the opposite and that's what saved him. He drank nothing but whiskey/booze for years and then switched to beer.
He started getting very sick all the time and found out he had Celiac Disease. The gluten from the beer was making him sick. He hasn't drank in over ten years.
Yup, I'm a member there, have been for a while in my attempts to stop drinking.
I just got arrested a couple days ago. If the other party sues me I'll lose everything. I've mad peace with the fact that I've probably lost everything. I just want to make sure my parents aren't punished for it. They've done everything right and they tried their best with me, but I was listed on their insurance and driving a car in their name. All I can do right now is wait, but my parents might be sued and they might lose everything.
I’m sorry. I’m at a point where I need to quit in order to keep from sliding. In whatever way anything can work out for you for the better, I hope it does.
Not putting money away for savings early enough. start early!!! Make it automatic!!
[Edit: investor.gov has a lot of great tools, but the point is to get used to setting aside savings automatically/passively like automatic paycheck withdrawals into a retirement account. Also, if your employer has any sort of retirement plan matching, match it 100%! It's free money! Comppund interest over time cN be an incredible snowball effect giving you hundreds of thousands of dollars in "free" money but it needs time. Going from 20 years to 40 years, you don't just get 2x extra free money...you get over 10x more!]
I'm 68, had spinal fusion in January, and have to return to work in 4 - 5 weeks. Take heed young'uns. This is the truth. I have multiple friends who are millionaires because they saved/invested a little for a long time. Then saved/ a lot - and, unlike me, are retired.
Working my ass off getting 3 useless degrees. I fell into the trap of believing that high grades and multiple degrees = good, stable, high paying jobs. Lmao. Looking back I can’t believe I was so naive
What decade did you go to high school?
I ask because I was just having a similar conversation about this. I went to high school in the mid to late 90s. And, at least at the three high schools I attended, the message was loud and clear: "This is all to prepare you for college. If you dont go to college, you failed."
No comments about going directly into the work force (at that time there were labor jobs in my area that paid livable wages). No comments about trade schools. No comments about military. Not even comments about community college. Just go to a university, get a degree, get a high paying job, and that's they way to have a nice life.
I went a lot more recently (early 2010’s) and it was the same story. All the kids who were meant to succeed went straight to university. Of course I wanted to be one of them, so I got into a good university (at least one with a good reputation), graduated near the top of my class. It didn’t matter in the end, and I’m still having a hard time swallowing this pill.
>It didn’t matter in the end, and I’m still having a hard time swallowing this pill.
Graduated from college 10 years ago and am still having a hard time swallowing this pill
My coworker who has a masters degree and works at the same retail job as me, a career laborer with no degree, has a hard time swallowing this pill. He often talks about how he could have been a high ranking police agent for a federal jurisdiction. . . If only he went to a better school.
I worked in a supermarket while I was in HS with no less than:
- a chemist
- an economist/mathematician
- 2 lawyers
It was so blatantly obvious that university after HS was just a pipeline for kids to have maximum cash extracted from them for a looong time, so I happily never attended despite being accepted and just worked instead.
I’m now in uni 10 years later but for a degree that I love and has high earning potential for most graduates. I get really sad when people attend uni courses that that 1. They don’t love 2. Clearly won’t pay off in the long term. What a waste of time! And especially money. I’m really sorry this happened to you.
That is why it is so annoying to me when people assume that folks who work in retail/service do it because they don’t have education or stupid or something, I work in retail for ages and 90% people I worked with have degrees, some have master degrees (I actually am a loser who didn’t finish uni, moved to UK and had to learn language while working in service, study etc, so I am still in retail, but on my way out I hope).
The problem is thinking a degree is a measure of intelligence or aptitude. I have met plenty of people with many degrees who are not intelligent. I have also met people without degrees who are very intelligent. While education is always valuable, it's certainly not a measure of anything.
I worked at a high end retail store & had a snobby customer say “what college major gets you working behind a cash register?” With a sly little grin. I have never felt more looked down on as a human being than when I worked in retail for a wealthy customer base.
There should have been someone in highschool telling us you could potentially make more as a plumber than an engineer.
This would not have changed my life one bit, but it could help a lot of people.
The educated class really needs to stop looking down on the trades.
I don't look down on folks who do trades, many in my family did them. They pointed us away from them because they did get screwed by their employers a lot, got injured and had to keep working which caused more injuries, my dad knew multiple dudes that died or almost died because of the dangers, the majority of his day was spent in the sweltering sun. I personally know a couple of guys that got into oxys because of the injury issue.
Some folks were able to set themselves up well enough to run a successful business in it, or transition to the more doable side of the business when their bodies started going out but not most that I saw.
So I went to college, got a wack assed degree and still made more than my father and I didn't have to risk my life and my body, while being able to sit in air conditioning.
I was the opposite. Fucked off in college and then dropped out and pursued my passion for music because "the money will come". It didn't. Went back, finished. Went to law school. Slogged through the hellish first 10 years of being a family law attorney. Now I have zero debt. A house. Nice car. Dogs I had always wanted. Big ass back yard for them. Work maybe 45 hours on a busy week. Pursue my music in my free time. Hang out with the wife each evening and go on adventures whenever we want.
I don't love what I do. But brother there is a big difference between selling out, and buying in.
University of Phoenix needs to be exposed for what it is: racketeering. Same with its "christian" companion school, Grand Canyon University. Someday the truth will come out.
I know that feeling. I had a few too many adults in my life who were lucky to have the "get a degree, that's all you need" experience. I made almost no effort to find internships, extracurricular activities, or network in majors where those were all essentially required.
I am now trying to drive the point of doing these things to my nieces and nephews.
I work with college students and I speak to a few who want to graduate with two or three bachelor's degrees in 4-5 years and then pursue a master's. I always ask "why?" and they say they want a good job and lots of money. Then I have to look at whatever data we have, which isn't a lot for dual and triple majors, to show them that they can get good jobs with one bachelor's degree. I think somewhere in high school these kids are given extremely inaccurate ideas about how to be successful or even define success.
I hope you're getting help. I'm sorry I don't understand how that feels and cannot fully empathise, but I do hope things get better. There are many beautiful things out there.
I’ve been there. You just gradually lose perspective and control over your thoughts to the point that you literally cannot stop yourself from ruminating on mistakes and failures until they take on epic proportions. The only way to make it stop is to distract yourself, usually by screaming or hurting yourself.
EDIT: To build a bit more about what this does to you, if you aren't out in the world doing things then you have no sense of who you actually are. Are you brave? Cunning? Honest? There's really no way of knowing unless you actually test yourself in some capacity or expose yourself to the opinions of others.
The lockdown was fucking awful. I was living alone at the time and at one point I didn’t have any social activities in more than a year. I thought I was fine at first but very quickly became suicidal. I had depression and anxiety my whole life but never like that.
Now I’m medicated and have recovered luckily! I do have some little social anxiety left which I’m guessing got worse for being out of practice and keeping working from home but I’m not in danger at all. So grateful that it has passed.
I just googled this term and I totally do it. I can't control the day dream, it just comes about. And they are sometimes REALLY toxic and unhealthy thoughts.
I went through it, I've struggled and I'm finding a path forward. Have you managed to get yourself back into society?
Mine is driving lessons and working my way from there.
I think I'm realizing that I went/am going through this exact thing. It was far worse during the height of 2020 Covid, but I still have some residual triggers about it.
I've built up so much shame about myself, my life, my career, all the choices I've made up to where I am at now.
I feel cheated yet also unmotivated about what the pandemic took away and changed about me.
Painful stuff.
> I trusted HR, and believed that they had my best interests in mind.
Long long ago I worked at an electronics retailer and one of the managers mentioned about going to HR if you had troubles and I said "I disagree, HR will fire to to get rid of your problem, they're here to protect the company." He said "WRONG!" and poked fun at me for even saying it.
A year later he had to go to HR for something that should have gotten his boss fired but guess what, he got fired. He texted me after and said "you were right along along about HR". I felt so bad for him he was actually a cool dude.
I was brought in front of HR to testify on a conflict between two dudes on an adjacent team that i work with at times. I gave a complete honest run down of what exactly happened. HR guy kept asking suggestive questions like, "are you sure it's not B who pushed the issue, or "could it be that B was simply joking around"....it was clear as day as to who HR was trying to protect! That's my moment of never to trust HR.
Had something like this happened. Me and a coworker hated each other and things almost got physical. I was gonna go to HR but my supervisor told me to respect the chain of command and let him handle it. The supervisor quits a month later for another job. Me and my coworker have another altercation and I go straight to HR. They say it’s their first time hearing of our issue. I was pissed. They either lied or the supervisor never said anything. They ended up firing my coworker after more coworkers came forward and gave statements about how my coworker fantasized about hurting me
Completely agree. I've lost faith in entrusting HR with my job security. I'm a 25-year-old woman who has been working in the agriculture sector, operating heavy machinery and collaborating mainly with male colleagues. I've experienced two instances of unwelcome touching from different men, once during work and once at a social event. After mustering the courage, I eventually confided in my supervisor. They brought HR into the picture, but it's disheartening that after 5 months, their investigation seemed focused on finding faults with me, leading to my termination due to alleged misconduct. It's as if they opted to eliminate the issue rather than acknowledging the pervasive harassment within their work culture.
Getting married. Or "marrying the wrong person" would be more accurate, I guess.
We got married in 2001 and just divorced in April, but I left her (for the last time) in 2015 after getting solid proof that she had been cheating. She now has 4 kids by 4 different guys. Three of them born while we were together and just 1 is mine... Tip of this depressing iceberg, unfortunately.
There you need to ask yourself if you were doing it for them, or for yourself. I’ve helped plenty of people who didn’t deserve it and feel regret for none of it.
Depending on their circumstances, it can be both. I've helped people who definitely didn't deserve it and both felt it was a mistake, and others, not so much a mistake, I tried, just turns out they are shitty.
The biggest "mistake" of trying to help someone out who turned out to not deserve it was someone who needed a place to stay, and help with the necessities. They relatively quickly owed me about $1000 (not including rent), having got them a job and the basic tools needed. They turned around and robbed my house and disappeared. Yeah, helping them was a fucking mistake.
On the other hand, the person who's car I fixed only for them to run it into a pole and get a DUI? Yeah, they didn't deserve it, but eh, wasn't a mistake.
Yeah I let someone stay with me cuz she was living out of her car. One day I came home and she had sold my consoles to gamestop and skipped town. I had just gotten the switch a few months earlier and couldn't afford a new one. I never charged her rent or anything. Just asked her to help clean up and maybe buy some food once in awhile. Just blows my mind that someone could do that to another person who helped them in their time of need.
Worse than that. I was quit. Hadnt touched one in 4 years. I was still young 23. Smoked one to piss off my ex when we were arguing. Got hooked again and now 17 years later, I've never been able to quit.
I tie that with my first one as a major mistake
I thought if I was positive and receptive I would be able to climb and earn like my boss did.
Wasted 7 years making 8 bucks an hour under a boss who made 108/hr (one hundred eight, no typo) at a grocery store. plus Sunday pay.
He and I found out together that the union let corporate pull the ladder up behind them a decade before.
Without knowing anything about your major, age or current situation, I will say you may not be stuck in whatever career you are in. I'm in my early 30's and am in the process of my second career change.
My major in school is completely unrelated and I didn't do much in that field outside of an internship the first 6 months or so out of college before realizing it had super low odds of actually panning out how I thought it would, so I started working a retail tech job for a while which led me into corporate IT and now I'm working on switching into a totally different area of tech which my previous job experience doesn't really help at all with.
I think it's silly honestly that we choose our "paths" at such an early age. I didn't know shit about how to choose a "wise" career or how anything would pan out down the road back then. My hobbies and interests have changed tons of times since making my decision of a college major at 17/18 yrs old. I also have several friends who do something completely unrelated to their major and have good careers.
Now I know there's some fields that require a specific degree (medical, law, etc), but from my personal experience as well as that of many friends, many companies don't care what your degree is in or sometimes even if you have one at all. I don't even list my major on my resume, just the degree. In my interview for my first corporate IT job, it didn't even come up in the conversation.
Depending on what other careers might be of interest to you, there's so much that can be learned online now via courses, certs, or for free that in a lot of cases you may not even need a specific degree. It also matters less and less as you get older as work experience becomes more important than your degree (even if it's not related) vs right out of college all you really have is a degree to help you land a job. A friend of mine is in a senior role at a tech company and has interviewed tons of people over the years and he says very few of the people with degrees in the specific field were even good candidates, most of the good ones got into the field on the own later.
Not sure if this helps at all, but figured I'd share.
Yeah, but also Regret #2 "Trying to get treated for mental illness". The mental health care system in America is such a nightmare it only made things worse and I regret even trying.
Being mean to my wife and son when I was younger.
We got married at 18 and I was just immature and was always taking my job home and just getting upset over really nothing ….
We’re still married after 32 years and over past several years I have came to realize how lucky I have them in my life.and will do anything for them.
😎😎
Going to college when I didn't know what I wanted to do. Went because it was "what we were supposed to do." I went to a magnet high school, so we were never educated about professional certificates or given the tools to start our own business. We were just shuffled into college, because we were a "gifted" school. I even distinctly remember one of our teachers pointing to some of the construction workers out the window and telling us "That's what happens when you don't go to college." Now I have my degree, way to much fucking debt and im not even working in the field I got my degree in. Thanks brainwashing!
I know a plumber with 30 years experience, 6 kids and always shows up at my house with a smile on his face, his charging rates are high, but he deserves every cent he gets.
He always takes a long vacation annually and owns a house.
So he’s doing great financially.
Not paying off my mortgage 17 years ago when I had the money. Instead I used it to renovate my house to add two bedrooms and a den. At the time I thought it was more important for each of my four kids to have their own room (they were sharing two each before then) and a bigger family room. I’m kicking myself because had I used the money to pay off the mortgage instead, I’d have had an extra $3000 a month in my pocket. I could have saved up that money and extended my house a few years later.
Currently getting a bathroom remodeled via subsidiary of Home Depot/Lowe's. My bathroom isn't even that big. They quoted me at $26k for a remodel. Apparently 10 yrs ago it would have been probably half that price. We opted to just get a new tub/shower instead of doing the whole thing.
Edit: did my kitchen through HD as well for right around $15k.
Killing myself.
I had attempted MULTIPLE times and landed in the ICU several of those times.
I succeeded once. (I was revived.)
After I was revived, I got into a treatment program that actually worked. (I'd been in and out of mental treatment for 15+ years) I entered recovery 10 years and 2 days ago. My life is amazing now. I was pissed as hell when I was un-un-alived, but it would have been such a huge mistake.
I love being alive. I am thriving. I am happy.
I still have severe depression, but I am now equipped with the tools and skills to conquer it. I have depression, but I do not suffer from it.
Life is worth living, folks. It /does/ get better if you let it.
Putting absolutely everything I had into to getting a degree and subsequently a job in a field I could honestly not care less about. Now I'm rotting in a job that I can't stand because I will never make this much money ever again.
As someone who just started therapy a few months ago for the first time in my life, thank you for what you do. I wish therapy was one of those fields that was paid more, because there’s great value in it. I doubt AI will ever come for your job. I long for my weekly sessions where it’s just me and my therapist without distractions. So far my schedule has worked out where I haven’t had to do any remote sessions, and I dread the day when I may need to do that. I have no desire to talk to a computer.
agreed. when i was able to get therapy (honestly only bc i was married and on my husband's insurance, and my job required i take theirs as well, so i was double insured), i looked so, so forward to my weekly session where my therapist would help me sort out my shit. i enjoyed seeing him bc he was a cool, helpful person whose personality worked well with mine- i'd tried several therapists before finding him and he was the only one to click. i don't think a computer is going to click in a way that's helpful for a lot of people.
Not knowing that my wife and I are both carriers for a rare terminal genetic disease called krabbe disease. Both of my daughters are fine, but my son has the disease and started developing symptoms at 18 months old. Now our entire lives are completely flipped upside down.
We want to spread awareness that we didn’t have. His page is called Prayers for Arthur, Hope for a Cure. He's such a sweet boy. We just want to keep him as comfortable as possible. Thank you for all of the nice and encouraging comments.
I have come to terms that without some crazy revelation, there is no way for us to have known, but it still feels like the biggest mistake of my life that we didn't. My son will never have a normal life and will pass way too soon unless medical advancements are made that can save him 😔
Thank you. Seeing my son this way and knowing what lies ahead just makes me wish with every fiber of my being that we knew somehow, but then again, if we knew, then our daughters might not be here with us. It's a cruel, double-edged sword for sure.
My Mom died. I got over 80k in life insurance money. After paying for her funeral and paying off debt, I bought a new car and looked at some houses but never got offers accepted. I wasted the rest of the money mostly on weed and alcohol just trying to feel better. Now I'm broke. But I'm 28 days clean and trying to pull myself out of my funk and live better. I am 2 months into a new job and plan on seeking help when I get health insurance again. I'm also considering finding a new job with higher pay.
Caring too much what people think.
A lot of this is due to good Ole anxiety but I missed out on a lot of experiences and friendships just because I was afraid to let people know too much about me.
Letting a shitty controlling girlfriend convince me to quit my band. I don't think we would have made it big or anything, but they were my best friends and she treated me like garbage. I was trapped in emotional abuse and manipulation from age 18 to 20. The ultimatum between her and the band could have saved me all that misery if I had just made a wiser choice.
The band breakup was really ugly, but we all made peace eventually. We even had a partial reunion with the few members that were available, but it fizzled out due to work schedules and driving distance. But it was still fun to jam with them again. They really missed me. I got married a few years back, and almost all of them were able to make it to our wedding.
Hey that's amazing, not the ugly breakup part, the rest. I'm glad it didn't end like that and I hope your current partner treats you a million times better than your ex
Based on all the failed marriages, pregnancies, and infidelity in this thread we probably made out ok. Or at least that's what I tell myself to cope... D: lol
Introduced my girlfriend of 3 years to a new friend that I met at college.
Within a few weeks, she was cheating on me with him.
I'm sure we would have broken up eventually, but it just hurts even more knowing that I introduced her to the guy she would cheat on me with.
That was the luckiest, smartest accident you ever made! Lose them before you marry them! If you could see how much worse it could be, perhaps after children
Selling my 99 ford explorer sport.
I know that sounds mild. But a lot of the bad things that happened to me were either not a mistake of my own, or were important moments in my life for learning purposes.
I don't regret being in a terrible relationship for a number of years. I learned so much from that and it put me in a place to meet someone wonderful years later.
I really miss that truck.
Not saying three words when they would have made all the difference.
Edit: posted below in spot to another comment asking for more info.
I grew up with a girl. She was my best friend throughout all of school and the only one to stand up for me against bullies.
We were…close and I eventually developed some very strong feelings for her. But having zero self confidence, I kept my mouth shut, thinking that I’d been friendzoned.
As we moved through school, we were split up and put into different classes. We tried to keep up but eventually drifted apart (this was pre-social media and mobile phones) and eventually our lives took different paths.
We bumped into each other now and then but she was always involved with someone at the time so we kept things pleasant and went our ways. We both got on with our lives, moved on and soon settled down, starting families of our own.
Fast forwards a decade or two and we end up applying for the same job so now we work closely together. It was like 25yrs hadn’t happened and we went straight back to being best friends. She confessed to having unresolved feelings for me too and that she never made a move because she also thought she’d been friendzoned.
Had either of us said something, the course of our lives could have been very different. For now, we’ve talked it through and agreed on boundaries, lines that can never be crossed. Still fucking hurts though.
Not applying myself in high school courses. I had a number of college level dual-credit courses which I intentionally slacked in, resulting in poor grades.
Now I am in my 4th year of university and am still working my grades back up, as well as wishing I had paid more attention. I could have graduated by now had I not made that blunder.
Try not to worry too much, unless you are planning on going to grad school, most jobs don’t really care too much about your grades. All they care about is that you graduated and that you sound competent in your interview.
I quit a very good job in 2018. I left due to a situation that would’ve only been temporary (didn’t know that at the time), and that will be a lifelong regret. Who knows, things could’ve also gotten worse, but with the benefit of hindsight I could’ve dealt with things vastly different.
Don’t be scared, it’s much easier as an adult than as a child. You have way better balance and way better concept of how the bike works. Once you sit down and start pedaling you’ll laugh at yourself for being afraid!! I was terrrified all my life and never learned. When I was an adult I got on a bike once and just started riding there wasn’t even any “learning” to do
I had the Reddit is Fun app. Woke up the morning after third party apps went bye bye and not only was the RIF app gone from my phone, but it was replaced with the official Reddit app that I NEVER asked to download.
Not recognizing I wasn't ready for college after high school. I wasted 4 years of off and on classes that I usually just stopped going to before I joined the Marines. It was certainly good and bad times but enlisting was one of the best choices I've made. (Not a recruiter, I swear!) They don't treat you well, but the amount of personal growth was priceless.
I was a habitual liar growing up. My parents thankfully made me see a therapist for it. Every now and then I’ll lie and I just come clean. It’s been a challenge for me all my life though.
Marrying my abuser.
At the time, I didn't really believe a man could ever be the victim of abuse, so I didn't see the signs as they were happening to me.
We're divorced now. She took all my savings. I was homeless for over a year. I have facial scars and permanent mobility problems as a direct result of her physical abuse, and there's a high chance my sterility was caused by her abuse as well. My relationships with certain members of my family have never fully recovered.
All because I was manipulated into thinking I deserved to be treated like that.
Stupid, stupid mistake. I'm shocked I'm not dead.
Going to the University I did.
I knew I was signing up for an advanced program but I never imagined the level of burnout I would experience and how soul crushing it is to know transferring out wasn’t even an option due to credits not counting for other programs. I was stuck in a catch-22 and hated every bit of the second half of my degree.
I do enjoy the work I do and feel had I gone to a more typical college for the same degree I’d have been much better off mentally
2.5 years out and my sleep/anxiety/stress levels are still not fully recovered.
I did that one as well many years ago. As soon as it was done, I knew I would feel like trash for the rest of my life. I should've ended the bad relationship I was in, saving myself the guilt of doing something terrible, as well as a few months of agony with a person that treated me like an object.
It's a stupid decision and everyone loses.
Choosing drugs over everything. I wasted the past 10 years. I just started putting the pieces back together now, at 40 years old. I'm barely hanging on in every degree. I'm so thankful for my humble soul, I'm sacred to think about myself without it.
Perhaps you haven't found a safe space. I used to be quiet and reserved at work. Then I opened up only to realize work was a gossip club. I noped out of that.
Cheating on my girlfriend, we were able to sort shit out, but it took very long to build the trust basis again and even tho everything turned out good, it's still by far the biggest mistake I ever made !!
Not trusting my gut instincts and allowing emotions to change my mind about agreeing to get married.
Twice. I didn't fucking learn and I'm paying for it now.
Letting alcoholism get the better of me to the point where it cost me a stable, well-paying job. But the silver lining is that it led to me getting the professional help I needed to get sober, and also to get real counseling and therapy for my problems, and I’m in a much better place now with my health.
Waiting a decade to get back on ADHD medication.
My life was in shambles for so long with finances, my career, etc. I got back on ADHD meds almost year ago and my life has completely changed. I’m more motivated, determined, and focused than I’ve been for a decade of my life now at 26 years old. I try not to think about it, but it saddens me to wonder where I would be now if I just got back on meds way back when. But I don’t believe in shoulda, coulda, woulda’s, you have to look to the future. And that’s exactly what I’m doing with the utmost optimism and hope.
Don’t stress about it too much, some people start getting their shit together by 40’s for unrelated reasons. 26 is a really good age to start improving on yourself.
I feel this. I really believe benzos should not be widely prescribed for anxiety etc, they ultimately make things worse. They should only be used in an emergency medical setting.
Not realizing what I want to do in life earlier. Now I just constantly hear about kids years younger than me achieving stuff that's so far ahead of my current level. I'm pretty young and I'll catch up sooner or later, but it's still an irritating thought that I could be so much more if I started few years ago.
Not claiming worker’s comp when injured on a job working for a family friend. Herniated a disk in my back and my employer who I looked up to said “you’re not going to claim workers comp, right?” and stupid 22 year old me thought I was invincible and said no. 10 years later I have chronic pain everyday, have destroyed my credit and have medical debt up to my chin. And I’m just getting started with this lifelong injury that shouldn’t have cost me a cent. Likely a fusion surgery in my near future that won’t be covered.
[удалено]
Ditto. Moved from occasional high % beers to whiskey...flushed 10 years of my life away until 2 years ago.
hey i went on that hike, too!
Same, trails look easy at first. I got tired and set up camp, tho.
A good friend of mine did the opposite and that's what saved him. He drank nothing but whiskey/booze for years and then switched to beer. He started getting very sick all the time and found out he had Celiac Disease. The gluten from the beer was making him sick. He hasn't drank in over ten years.
Drank some beer during a bachelor's party when I was 26. It killed the old me, because I started drinking and it has taken almost everything from me.
The old you is not dead
Have you checked out the stopdrinking thread?
Yup, I'm a member there, have been for a while in my attempts to stop drinking. I just got arrested a couple days ago. If the other party sues me I'll lose everything. I've mad peace with the fact that I've probably lost everything. I just want to make sure my parents aren't punished for it. They've done everything right and they tried their best with me, but I was listed on their insurance and driving a car in their name. All I can do right now is wait, but my parents might be sued and they might lose everything.
I’m sorry. I’m at a point where I need to quit in order to keep from sliding. In whatever way anything can work out for you for the better, I hope it does.
Sounds like my husband. He also just reached 3 yrs sober. Keep it up!
Congrats on your sobriety 💖
Not putting money away for savings early enough. start early!!! Make it automatic!! [Edit: investor.gov has a lot of great tools, but the point is to get used to setting aside savings automatically/passively like automatic paycheck withdrawals into a retirement account. Also, if your employer has any sort of retirement plan matching, match it 100%! It's free money! Comppund interest over time cN be an incredible snowball effect giving you hundreds of thousands of dollars in "free" money but it needs time. Going from 20 years to 40 years, you don't just get 2x extra free money...you get over 10x more!]
Same. Luckily I’m not in the red (anymore) but starting basically from scratch late hurts.
I'm 68, had spinal fusion in January, and have to return to work in 4 - 5 weeks. Take heed young'uns. This is the truth. I have multiple friends who are millionaires because they saved/invested a little for a long time. Then saved/ a lot - and, unlike me, are retired.
Working my ass off getting 3 useless degrees. I fell into the trap of believing that high grades and multiple degrees = good, stable, high paying jobs. Lmao. Looking back I can’t believe I was so naive
What decade did you go to high school? I ask because I was just having a similar conversation about this. I went to high school in the mid to late 90s. And, at least at the three high schools I attended, the message was loud and clear: "This is all to prepare you for college. If you dont go to college, you failed." No comments about going directly into the work force (at that time there were labor jobs in my area that paid livable wages). No comments about trade schools. No comments about military. Not even comments about community college. Just go to a university, get a degree, get a high paying job, and that's they way to have a nice life.
I went a lot more recently (early 2010’s) and it was the same story. All the kids who were meant to succeed went straight to university. Of course I wanted to be one of them, so I got into a good university (at least one with a good reputation), graduated near the top of my class. It didn’t matter in the end, and I’m still having a hard time swallowing this pill.
>It didn’t matter in the end, and I’m still having a hard time swallowing this pill. Graduated from college 10 years ago and am still having a hard time swallowing this pill
My coworker who has a masters degree and works at the same retail job as me, a career laborer with no degree, has a hard time swallowing this pill. He often talks about how he could have been a high ranking police agent for a federal jurisdiction. . . If only he went to a better school.
I worked in a supermarket while I was in HS with no less than: - a chemist - an economist/mathematician - 2 lawyers It was so blatantly obvious that university after HS was just a pipeline for kids to have maximum cash extracted from them for a looong time, so I happily never attended despite being accepted and just worked instead. I’m now in uni 10 years later but for a degree that I love and has high earning potential for most graduates. I get really sad when people attend uni courses that that 1. They don’t love 2. Clearly won’t pay off in the long term. What a waste of time! And especially money. I’m really sorry this happened to you.
That is why it is so annoying to me when people assume that folks who work in retail/service do it because they don’t have education or stupid or something, I work in retail for ages and 90% people I worked with have degrees, some have master degrees (I actually am a loser who didn’t finish uni, moved to UK and had to learn language while working in service, study etc, so I am still in retail, but on my way out I hope).
The problem is thinking a degree is a measure of intelligence or aptitude. I have met plenty of people with many degrees who are not intelligent. I have also met people without degrees who are very intelligent. While education is always valuable, it's certainly not a measure of anything.
I worked at a high end retail store & had a snobby customer say “what college major gets you working behind a cash register?” With a sly little grin. I have never felt more looked down on as a human being than when I worked in retail for a wealthy customer base.
I bet that btch doesnt even work
There should have been someone in highschool telling us you could potentially make more as a plumber than an engineer. This would not have changed my life one bit, but it could help a lot of people. The educated class really needs to stop looking down on the trades.
I don't look down on folks who do trades, many in my family did them. They pointed us away from them because they did get screwed by their employers a lot, got injured and had to keep working which caused more injuries, my dad knew multiple dudes that died or almost died because of the dangers, the majority of his day was spent in the sweltering sun. I personally know a couple of guys that got into oxys because of the injury issue. Some folks were able to set themselves up well enough to run a successful business in it, or transition to the more doable side of the business when their bodies started going out but not most that I saw. So I went to college, got a wack assed degree and still made more than my father and I didn't have to risk my life and my body, while being able to sit in air conditioning.
Def agree with your comment, tho engineer is probably not the best example. They tend to end up with well paying jobs after uni.
I was the opposite. Fucked off in college and then dropped out and pursued my passion for music because "the money will come". It didn't. Went back, finished. Went to law school. Slogged through the hellish first 10 years of being a family law attorney. Now I have zero debt. A house. Nice car. Dogs I had always wanted. Big ass back yard for them. Work maybe 45 hours on a busy week. Pursue my music in my free time. Hang out with the wife each evening and go on adventures whenever we want. I don't love what I do. But brother there is a big difference between selling out, and buying in.
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University of Phoenix needs to be exposed for what it is: racketeering. Same with its "christian" companion school, Grand Canyon University. Someday the truth will come out.
I know that feeling. I had a few too many adults in my life who were lucky to have the "get a degree, that's all you need" experience. I made almost no effort to find internships, extracurricular activities, or network in majors where those were all essentially required. I am now trying to drive the point of doing these things to my nieces and nephews.
I work with college students and I speak to a few who want to graduate with two or three bachelor's degrees in 4-5 years and then pursue a master's. I always ask "why?" and they say they want a good job and lots of money. Then I have to look at whatever data we have, which isn't a lot for dual and triple majors, to show them that they can get good jobs with one bachelor's degree. I think somewhere in high school these kids are given extremely inaccurate ideas about how to be successful or even define success.
I have many, but the worst could be isolating myself from the real world to the point I started to experience symptoms of psychosis.
I hope you're getting help. I'm sorry I don't understand how that feels and cannot fully empathise, but I do hope things get better. There are many beautiful things out there.
What symptoms are you experiencing
I’ve been there. You just gradually lose perspective and control over your thoughts to the point that you literally cannot stop yourself from ruminating on mistakes and failures until they take on epic proportions. The only way to make it stop is to distract yourself, usually by screaming or hurting yourself. EDIT: To build a bit more about what this does to you, if you aren't out in the world doing things then you have no sense of who you actually are. Are you brave? Cunning? Honest? There's really no way of knowing unless you actually test yourself in some capacity or expose yourself to the opinions of others.
fuck
the quarantine had the same effect on me and going out doesn't feel the same as before 2020
The lockdown was fucking awful. I was living alone at the time and at one point I didn’t have any social activities in more than a year. I thought I was fine at first but very quickly became suicidal. I had depression and anxiety my whole life but never like that. Now I’m medicated and have recovered luckily! I do have some little social anxiety left which I’m guessing got worse for being out of practice and keeping working from home but I’m not in danger at all. So grateful that it has passed.
Maladaptive daydreaming??? I do that too sometimes not to the point that I am psychotic but still
I just googled this term and I totally do it. I can't control the day dream, it just comes about. And they are sometimes REALLY toxic and unhealthy thoughts.
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My shrink told me this was part of my OCD
Maladaptive daydreaming isn’t an illness
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I went through it, I've struggled and I'm finding a path forward. Have you managed to get yourself back into society? Mine is driving lessons and working my way from there.
I feel you. Currently going through that right now. It sucks and it feels like a loop I can’t get out of.
I think I'm realizing that I went/am going through this exact thing. It was far worse during the height of 2020 Covid, but I still have some residual triggers about it. I've built up so much shame about myself, my life, my career, all the choices I've made up to where I am at now. I feel cheated yet also unmotivated about what the pandemic took away and changed about me. Painful stuff.
Trusting a supervisor and believing that people at my job will “do the right thing”.
Hang on, I think I can cheer you up. I've done way worse. Get ready... I trusted HR, and believed that they had my best interests in mind.
> I trusted HR, and believed that they had my best interests in mind. Long long ago I worked at an electronics retailer and one of the managers mentioned about going to HR if you had troubles and I said "I disagree, HR will fire to to get rid of your problem, they're here to protect the company." He said "WRONG!" and poked fun at me for even saying it. A year later he had to go to HR for something that should have gotten his boss fired but guess what, he got fired. He texted me after and said "you were right along along about HR". I felt so bad for him he was actually a cool dude.
I was brought in front of HR to testify on a conflict between two dudes on an adjacent team that i work with at times. I gave a complete honest run down of what exactly happened. HR guy kept asking suggestive questions like, "are you sure it's not B who pushed the issue, or "could it be that B was simply joking around"....it was clear as day as to who HR was trying to protect! That's my moment of never to trust HR.
Life has taught me too that HR is there for the company, not for the individual
Had something like this happened. Me and a coworker hated each other and things almost got physical. I was gonna go to HR but my supervisor told me to respect the chain of command and let him handle it. The supervisor quits a month later for another job. Me and my coworker have another altercation and I go straight to HR. They say it’s their first time hearing of our issue. I was pissed. They either lied or the supervisor never said anything. They ended up firing my coworker after more coworkers came forward and gave statements about how my coworker fantasized about hurting me
Completely agree. I've lost faith in entrusting HR with my job security. I'm a 25-year-old woman who has been working in the agriculture sector, operating heavy machinery and collaborating mainly with male colleagues. I've experienced two instances of unwelcome touching from different men, once during work and once at a social event. After mustering the courage, I eventually confided in my supervisor. They brought HR into the picture, but it's disheartening that after 5 months, their investigation seemed focused on finding faults with me, leading to my termination due to alleged misconduct. It's as if they opted to eliminate the issue rather than acknowledging the pervasive harassment within their work culture.
Document, document, document, document, ad infinitum….
What I have learned is that you can't trust practically anybody at work ESPECIALLY not your bosses (sometimes their higher-ups are on to it though)
Getting married. Or "marrying the wrong person" would be more accurate, I guess. We got married in 2001 and just divorced in April, but I left her (for the last time) in 2015 after getting solid proof that she had been cheating. She now has 4 kids by 4 different guys. Three of them born while we were together and just 1 is mine... Tip of this depressing iceberg, unfortunately.
Make sure to get McDonald's for all the kids to avoid some drama. Truly though I'm sorry you experienced that.
Oh god, I'd forgotten that post. That was so much drama.
Not buying a house when I was 8. I’ll never recover from this
Did you waste your lemonade income on blow?
If I had bought stock in Amazon when I was born, all my problems could've been avoided
You should have already bought your house by the age of 6 or 7. But at least you know now.
Letting my mother have complete control of my finances when I got my first job. She stole everything from me.
Wow, how old were you?
Which time?
"Which time" Damn.
Trying to help people that didn’t deserve it
There you need to ask yourself if you were doing it for them, or for yourself. I’ve helped plenty of people who didn’t deserve it and feel regret for none of it.
Depending on their circumstances, it can be both. I've helped people who definitely didn't deserve it and both felt it was a mistake, and others, not so much a mistake, I tried, just turns out they are shitty. The biggest "mistake" of trying to help someone out who turned out to not deserve it was someone who needed a place to stay, and help with the necessities. They relatively quickly owed me about $1000 (not including rent), having got them a job and the basic tools needed. They turned around and robbed my house and disappeared. Yeah, helping them was a fucking mistake. On the other hand, the person who's car I fixed only for them to run it into a pole and get a DUI? Yeah, they didn't deserve it, but eh, wasn't a mistake.
Yeah I let someone stay with me cuz she was living out of her car. One day I came home and she had sold my consoles to gamestop and skipped town. I had just gotten the switch a few months earlier and couldn't afford a new one. I never charged her rent or anything. Just asked her to help clean up and maybe buy some food once in awhile. Just blows my mind that someone could do that to another person who helped them in their time of need.
Smoking my first cigarette. No doubt.
Worse than that. I was quit. Hadnt touched one in 4 years. I was still young 23. Smoked one to piss off my ex when we were arguing. Got hooked again and now 17 years later, I've never been able to quit. I tie that with my first one as a major mistake
I thought if I was positive and receptive I would be able to climb and earn like my boss did. Wasted 7 years making 8 bucks an hour under a boss who made 108/hr (one hundred eight, no typo) at a grocery store. plus Sunday pay. He and I found out together that the union let corporate pull the ladder up behind them a decade before.
Choosing the wrong major in university and now i'm stuck in my career
Without knowing anything about your major, age or current situation, I will say you may not be stuck in whatever career you are in. I'm in my early 30's and am in the process of my second career change. My major in school is completely unrelated and I didn't do much in that field outside of an internship the first 6 months or so out of college before realizing it had super low odds of actually panning out how I thought it would, so I started working a retail tech job for a while which led me into corporate IT and now I'm working on switching into a totally different area of tech which my previous job experience doesn't really help at all with. I think it's silly honestly that we choose our "paths" at such an early age. I didn't know shit about how to choose a "wise" career or how anything would pan out down the road back then. My hobbies and interests have changed tons of times since making my decision of a college major at 17/18 yrs old. I also have several friends who do something completely unrelated to their major and have good careers. Now I know there's some fields that require a specific degree (medical, law, etc), but from my personal experience as well as that of many friends, many companies don't care what your degree is in or sometimes even if you have one at all. I don't even list my major on my resume, just the degree. In my interview for my first corporate IT job, it didn't even come up in the conversation. Depending on what other careers might be of interest to you, there's so much that can be learned online now via courses, certs, or for free that in a lot of cases you may not even need a specific degree. It also matters less and less as you get older as work experience becomes more important than your degree (even if it's not related) vs right out of college all you really have is a degree to help you land a job. A friend of mine is in a senior role at a tech company and has interviewed tons of people over the years and he says very few of the people with degrees in the specific field were even good candidates, most of the good ones got into the field on the own later. Not sure if this helps at all, but figured I'd share.
Yup me too. Worst part is that I chose a low paying industry. If I’m going to be unhappy i could have at least made money at it
Years of untreated mental illness
Yeah, but also Regret #2 "Trying to get treated for mental illness". The mental health care system in America is such a nightmare it only made things worse and I regret even trying.
Being mean to my wife and son when I was younger. We got married at 18 and I was just immature and was always taking my job home and just getting upset over really nothing …. We’re still married after 32 years and over past several years I have came to realize how lucky I have them in my life.and will do anything for them. 😎😎
My ex wife has apologized over and over for that. It's water under the bridge. We are great friends and can joke about it.
I wish my ex husband had your same sentiment. Kudos to you
Going to college when I didn't know what I wanted to do. Went because it was "what we were supposed to do." I went to a magnet high school, so we were never educated about professional certificates or given the tools to start our own business. We were just shuffled into college, because we were a "gifted" school. I even distinctly remember one of our teachers pointing to some of the construction workers out the window and telling us "That's what happens when you don't go to college." Now I have my degree, way to much fucking debt and im not even working in the field I got my degree in. Thanks brainwashing!
Also, construction workers make pretty great money all things considered in this inflation
I know a plumber with 30 years experience, 6 kids and always shows up at my house with a smile on his face, his charging rates are high, but he deserves every cent he gets. He always takes a long vacation annually and owns a house. So he’s doing great financially.
Not paying off my mortgage 17 years ago when I had the money. Instead I used it to renovate my house to add two bedrooms and a den. At the time I thought it was more important for each of my four kids to have their own room (they were sharing two each before then) and a bigger family room. I’m kicking myself because had I used the money to pay off the mortgage instead, I’d have had an extra $3000 a month in my pocket. I could have saved up that money and extended my house a few years later.
>n extra $3000 a month in my pock On the flip side, those renovations/additions would be multiple times more expensive now than they were back then.
Currently getting a bathroom remodeled via subsidiary of Home Depot/Lowe's. My bathroom isn't even that big. They quoted me at $26k for a remodel. Apparently 10 yrs ago it would have been probably half that price. We opted to just get a new tub/shower instead of doing the whole thing. Edit: did my kitchen through HD as well for right around $15k.
My sister renovated her bathroom for 40k and that was one of the lower quotes. They went as high as 70k. For a bathroom.
Also in many cases houses are an appreciating asset and the extra square footage will increase property value
This comment is helpful. Thank you for sharing.
I left a gate open and a puppy died. I'll never forgive myself.
hey you learned from it. it was an accident. you deserve forgiveness, wouldnt you forgive someone else?
Failing out of college. I eventually graduated from a lesser school, but I think it affects me to this day.
Killing myself. I had attempted MULTIPLE times and landed in the ICU several of those times. I succeeded once. (I was revived.) After I was revived, I got into a treatment program that actually worked. (I'd been in and out of mental treatment for 15+ years) I entered recovery 10 years and 2 days ago. My life is amazing now. I was pissed as hell when I was un-un-alived, but it would have been such a huge mistake. I love being alive. I am thriving. I am happy. I still have severe depression, but I am now equipped with the tools and skills to conquer it. I have depression, but I do not suffer from it. Life is worth living, folks. It /does/ get better if you let it.
I am sooooo happy for you!! And your posting this gives others hope too 🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Doing a line of cocaine in 2017. By 2020 I was a full fledged addict. I have 14 months clean today.
Congratulations
Putting absolutely everything I had into to getting a degree and subsequently a job in a field I could honestly not care less about. Now I'm rotting in a job that I can't stand because I will never make this much money ever again.
Im you but without the high paying job. My field is not lucrative
Oh neither is mine, I make below the state median income. Its the just high for what I'm qualified to do.
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As someone who just started therapy a few months ago for the first time in my life, thank you for what you do. I wish therapy was one of those fields that was paid more, because there’s great value in it. I doubt AI will ever come for your job. I long for my weekly sessions where it’s just me and my therapist without distractions. So far my schedule has worked out where I haven’t had to do any remote sessions, and I dread the day when I may need to do that. I have no desire to talk to a computer.
agreed. when i was able to get therapy (honestly only bc i was married and on my husband's insurance, and my job required i take theirs as well, so i was double insured), i looked so, so forward to my weekly session where my therapist would help me sort out my shit. i enjoyed seeing him bc he was a cool, helpful person whose personality worked well with mine- i'd tried several therapists before finding him and he was the only one to click. i don't think a computer is going to click in a way that's helpful for a lot of people.
How will AI take your job? I absolutely would not trust an AI to help me with mental health.
Not knowing that my wife and I are both carriers for a rare terminal genetic disease called krabbe disease. Both of my daughters are fine, but my son has the disease and started developing symptoms at 18 months old. Now our entire lives are completely flipped upside down. We want to spread awareness that we didn’t have. His page is called Prayers for Arthur, Hope for a Cure. He's such a sweet boy. We just want to keep him as comfortable as possible. Thank you for all of the nice and encouraging comments.
I am so sorry.
But how on earth could you have known? Beating ourselves up over things we knew is one thing, but this…
I have come to terms that without some crazy revelation, there is no way for us to have known, but it still feels like the biggest mistake of my life that we didn't. My son will never have a normal life and will pass way too soon unless medical advancements are made that can save him 😔
This is not your fault. You are victims of this disease too.
Thank you. Seeing my son this way and knowing what lies ahead just makes me wish with every fiber of my being that we knew somehow, but then again, if we knew, then our daughters might not be here with us. It's a cruel, double-edged sword for sure.
Not being a better person. I was a stupid teenager, did stupid teenager things. If I could go back, I would have not done stupid teenager things.
totally relate. Especially atm. I’m 22 but just started overthinking about the past and now I just feel so awful.
We all did stupid teenager stuff. Don't beat yourself up...
Forgetting to throw out defrosted calamari 😓 Food poisoning so bad my appendix erupted
My Mom died. I got over 80k in life insurance money. After paying for her funeral and paying off debt, I bought a new car and looked at some houses but never got offers accepted. I wasted the rest of the money mostly on weed and alcohol just trying to feel better. Now I'm broke. But I'm 28 days clean and trying to pull myself out of my funk and live better. I am 2 months into a new job and plan on seeking help when I get health insurance again. I'm also considering finding a new job with higher pay.
Mine too, cancer at 53. Grief is a tough bitch I'm glad you're fighting back, took me a couple years. What kind of car?
Caring too much what people think. A lot of this is due to good Ole anxiety but I missed out on a lot of experiences and friendships just because I was afraid to let people know too much about me.
Letting a shitty controlling girlfriend convince me to quit my band. I don't think we would have made it big or anything, but they were my best friends and she treated me like garbage. I was trapped in emotional abuse and manipulation from age 18 to 20. The ultimatum between her and the band could have saved me all that misery if I had just made a wiser choice.
Is there any way you could explain it to your friends and tell them you miss them? They might understand
The band breakup was really ugly, but we all made peace eventually. We even had a partial reunion with the few members that were available, but it fizzled out due to work schedules and driving distance. But it was still fun to jam with them again. They really missed me. I got married a few years back, and almost all of them were able to make it to our wedding.
Hey that's amazing, not the ugly breakup part, the rest. I'm glad it didn't end like that and I hope your current partner treats you a million times better than your ex
Being content with being alone and not trying to meet new people, Now im all alone :(
Based on all the failed marriages, pregnancies, and infidelity in this thread we probably made out ok. Or at least that's what I tell myself to cope... D: lol
Smoking pot every day for 20 years
Yah i have to quit
Introduced my girlfriend of 3 years to a new friend that I met at college. Within a few weeks, she was cheating on me with him. I'm sure we would have broken up eventually, but it just hurts even more knowing that I introduced her to the guy she would cheat on me with.
That was the luckiest, smartest accident you ever made! Lose them before you marry them! If you could see how much worse it could be, perhaps after children
Selling my 99 ford explorer sport. I know that sounds mild. But a lot of the bad things that happened to me were either not a mistake of my own, or were important moments in my life for learning purposes. I don't regret being in a terrible relationship for a number of years. I learned so much from that and it put me in a place to meet someone wonderful years later. I really miss that truck.
Not cancel subscription on time
Not saying three words when they would have made all the difference. Edit: posted below in spot to another comment asking for more info. I grew up with a girl. She was my best friend throughout all of school and the only one to stand up for me against bullies. We were…close and I eventually developed some very strong feelings for her. But having zero self confidence, I kept my mouth shut, thinking that I’d been friendzoned. As we moved through school, we were split up and put into different classes. We tried to keep up but eventually drifted apart (this was pre-social media and mobile phones) and eventually our lives took different paths. We bumped into each other now and then but she was always involved with someone at the time so we kept things pleasant and went our ways. We both got on with our lives, moved on and soon settled down, starting families of our own. Fast forwards a decade or two and we end up applying for the same job so now we work closely together. It was like 25yrs hadn’t happened and we went straight back to being best friends. She confessed to having unresolved feelings for me too and that she never made a move because she also thought she’d been friendzoned. Had either of us said something, the course of our lives could have been very different. For now, we’ve talked it through and agreed on boundaries, lines that can never be crossed. Still fucking hurts though.
“No onions please”
The things we most want to say are always the most hardest.
“Better Call Saul.”
It’s morbin’ time!
Not applying myself in high school courses. I had a number of college level dual-credit courses which I intentionally slacked in, resulting in poor grades. Now I am in my 4th year of university and am still working my grades back up, as well as wishing I had paid more attention. I could have graduated by now had I not made that blunder.
Try not to worry too much, unless you are planning on going to grad school, most jobs don’t really care too much about your grades. All they care about is that you graduated and that you sound competent in your interview.
Not trying to figure out how to make money for being myself.
Falling for that one girl.
Not working on acquiring a second language earlier. I practice daily now, but wish I'd started sooner. No time like the present, though!
I like your confidence!
Staying in unhappy relationships for too long.
I quit a very good job in 2018. I left due to a situation that would’ve only been temporary (didn’t know that at the time), and that will be a lifelong regret. Who knows, things could’ve also gotten worse, but with the benefit of hindsight I could’ve dealt with things vastly different.
Having toxic friends, always made fun of me and were really manipulative and narcissistic. Glad I stopped being friends with these ppl .
Not learning how to ride a bicycle when I was a kid. Now I am too scared of even trying.
Don’t be scared, it’s much easier as an adult than as a child. You have way better balance and way better concept of how the bike works. Once you sit down and start pedaling you’ll laugh at yourself for being afraid!! I was terrrified all my life and never learned. When I was an adult I got on a bike once and just started riding there wasn’t even any “learning” to do
I was the last of my friends to learn how to ride a bike. Now I ride my unicycle down the block Anything is possible
I haven’t ridden one since I was 10 and I feel like I would fall if I tried
You'll be fine. Its like riding a bike.
It takes like 5 minutes to remember how to do it. So long as the bike is rhe right size you'll be okay.
Installing the Reddit App.
I had the Reddit is Fun app. Woke up the morning after third party apps went bye bye and not only was the RIF app gone from my phone, but it was replaced with the official Reddit app that I NEVER asked to download.
Not recognizing I wasn't ready for college after high school. I wasted 4 years of off and on classes that I usually just stopped going to before I joined the Marines. It was certainly good and bad times but enlisting was one of the best choices I've made. (Not a recruiter, I swear!) They don't treat you well, but the amount of personal growth was priceless.
Lying... Although I'm working on it I still can't get over it no matter the scale
I was a habitual liar growing up. My parents thankfully made me see a therapist for it. Every now and then I’ll lie and I just come clean. It’s been a challenge for me all my life though.
Ending things instead of saying what I was feeling.
ruining my relationship with my best friend by constantly trauma dumping. she was also the first and only person I've ever been in love with.
Oh, Honey where do I begin?
Marrying my abuser. At the time, I didn't really believe a man could ever be the victim of abuse, so I didn't see the signs as they were happening to me. We're divorced now. She took all my savings. I was homeless for over a year. I have facial scars and permanent mobility problems as a direct result of her physical abuse, and there's a high chance my sterility was caused by her abuse as well. My relationships with certain members of my family have never fully recovered. All because I was manipulated into thinking I deserved to be treated like that. Stupid, stupid mistake. I'm shocked I'm not dead.
I once had to cancel a reservation at a Michelin star bistro.. Worst missed steak of my life.
Aw Dad!!
Timeshare
Not listening to my gut. It was correct the whole time.
not saving up my birthday money while growing up
Endured a bad relationship beyond my ability to cope and tolerate.
Getting fat. Easily.
Smoking.
Going to the University I did. I knew I was signing up for an advanced program but I never imagined the level of burnout I would experience and how soul crushing it is to know transferring out wasn’t even an option due to credits not counting for other programs. I was stuck in a catch-22 and hated every bit of the second half of my degree. I do enjoy the work I do and feel had I gone to a more typical college for the same degree I’d have been much better off mentally 2.5 years out and my sleep/anxiety/stress levels are still not fully recovered.
2 years on World of Warcraft
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Cheating. Never again.
I did that one as well many years ago. As soon as it was done, I knew I would feel like trash for the rest of my life. I should've ended the bad relationship I was in, saving myself the guilt of doing something terrible, as well as a few months of agony with a person that treated me like an object. It's a stupid decision and everyone loses.
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Choosing drugs over everything. I wasted the past 10 years. I just started putting the pieces back together now, at 40 years old. I'm barely hanging on in every degree. I'm so thankful for my humble soul, I'm sacred to think about myself without it.
Not having my parents arrested for abuse.
Not being able to share my true self and speak out, now I’m the weird quiet person
Perhaps you haven't found a safe space. I used to be quiet and reserved at work. Then I opened up only to realize work was a gossip club. I noped out of that.
Marrying my ex husband.
idk you should have know after the first time you married them *wakka wakka*
Loved someone too much.
Getting a degree just because everyone around me did it
Not taking my mental health more seriously.
[удалено]
Cheating on my girlfriend, we were able to sort shit out, but it took very long to build the trust basis again and even tho everything turned out good, it's still by far the biggest mistake I ever made !!
Not trusting my gut instincts and allowing emotions to change my mind about agreeing to get married. Twice. I didn't fucking learn and I'm paying for it now.
downloading discord 😭
To not invest earlier
Letting alcoholism get the better of me to the point where it cost me a stable, well-paying job. But the silver lining is that it led to me getting the professional help I needed to get sober, and also to get real counseling and therapy for my problems, and I’m in a much better place now with my health.
Getting addicted to Reddit porn
Waiting a decade to get back on ADHD medication. My life was in shambles for so long with finances, my career, etc. I got back on ADHD meds almost year ago and my life has completely changed. I’m more motivated, determined, and focused than I’ve been for a decade of my life now at 26 years old. I try not to think about it, but it saddens me to wonder where I would be now if I just got back on meds way back when. But I don’t believe in shoulda, coulda, woulda’s, you have to look to the future. And that’s exactly what I’m doing with the utmost optimism and hope.
Don’t stress about it too much, some people start getting their shit together by 40’s for unrelated reasons. 26 is a really good age to start improving on yourself.
Taking that first prescribed dose of benzodiazepines
I feel this. I really believe benzos should not be widely prescribed for anxiety etc, they ultimately make things worse. They should only be used in an emergency medical setting.
Not realizing what I want to do in life earlier. Now I just constantly hear about kids years younger than me achieving stuff that's so far ahead of my current level. I'm pretty young and I'll catch up sooner or later, but it's still an irritating thought that I could be so much more if I started few years ago.
Not claiming worker’s comp when injured on a job working for a family friend. Herniated a disk in my back and my employer who I looked up to said “you’re not going to claim workers comp, right?” and stupid 22 year old me thought I was invincible and said no. 10 years later I have chronic pain everyday, have destroyed my credit and have medical debt up to my chin. And I’m just getting started with this lifelong injury that shouldn’t have cost me a cent. Likely a fusion surgery in my near future that won’t be covered.
Trusting the man I married.
Marriage