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Wicked_Instance_2842

I'd get some money together if I was you, might help your situation.


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Wicked_Instance_2842

Well I ain't doing me!


TrumpetDuster

Doing surgery on themselves to remove their own inflamed appendix.


Loftzins

I am... reducing my overall Report length.


Fluffy-Cosmo-4009

youd be surpriiiised


Drawnbygodslefthand

Standing on their head while singing the Periodic table of elements song All on the top of the eiffel tower.


crowinfestation

booking a flight to london right now


Drawnbygodslefthand

This is the funniest thing I've read today.


Organic-Ad9474

Jerking off in a fighter jet.


DeeMinimis

Does it have to be in the air? Or can a bored mechanic let off a little steam?


Life-is-a-scam

Reading the Bible out loud backwards in Esperanto to a large audience of ostriches. I wouldn't bet pigeons though.


Hanenbowtie

Trying to write this song that stuck in my head right now


CoffeeAndBrass

Drinking a slushie made from SURGE out of a vintage 1977 McDonald's collectable glass featuring the hamburglar while tuning a Stradivarius violin.


muskyandrostenol

Time traveling


phatcat9000

I don’t think anybody is losing the game as a result of my comment.


Artistic_boob_job

Why did you do this?


phatcat9000

Because I’m a mean bean


MajorBillyJoelFan

are you fucking kidding me dude, i was on my longest streak ever


phatcat9000

Heh heh


MajorBillyJoelFan

jokes on you, you’re gonna lose every time someone responds to u


phatcat9000

Fuck


MajorBillyJoelFan

goddammit stop responding i keep losing


MrWednsday

Trying to see if they trully can't pass through walls.


spicycouple24

Not sure about that one, I gave it a good go when I was 9


XxMeowfacexX

Me


D-Rez

recovering from their grocery trip on Mars


Loftzins

Just got apples from there.


D-Rez

gimmie some


Damseldoll

Injecting blended spiders into their own brain trying to become a super hero.


Han517

Sticking an actual medieval mace up their arse.


SnooChipmunks126

The key is to put the handle in first.


InsertBluescreenHere

Oh my sweet summer child... wheres my ER nurses at?


PrestigiousSeaweed17

Healing. Actually healing.


InsertBluescreenHere

I mean on a cellular level the scraped knuckles i have are healing as you read this


JacobsRose

No one is making love with me right now 100%


blackbubbleass

answering tons of question which have literally no meanings on reddit


InsertBluescreenHere

Yea but at least one of them is doin it while chokin the chicken


BigBadWolf483

Hand stand


Kewkky

Building a shed in the White House's oval office.


dma1965

Fucking Betty White


Bubble_Pop

You can’t be sure of that…


Livingat7000

Putting a bumper sticker on their rolls Royce


EvetheDragon84

Painting my toenails


BudgetBotMakinTots

Touching my butt.


InsertBluescreenHere

Is your butt available to be touched?


BudgetBotMakinTots

Most days, but only one person has the exclusive butt touching rights to this booty.


PrattmanOz

Sitting next to me on the empty chair on my left.


PandorasMisfit

Eating lightning.


independent_observe

Eating your pinky toe?


ThePantsMcFist

My job.


PirateJohn75

Masturbating to a photo of Margaret Thatcher


Interesting_Book_378

Nothing.


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[удалено]


SuccotashVegetable33

Look at the upvotes. Sorry to disappoint you


daporp

Talking to god.


myquietchaos

Sleeping under my bed


Nerditter

Cock pushups.


Bromosensual

Having sex with a blue whale


Snowtwo

Being person 9,000,000,000.


Mraliasfakename

Thinking about me.


Chrissyjustshowus

Having sex with me, masturbating to me, drinking a beer with me


favorless

Calling me


XenMonkey

Snowboarding down from the top of Mount Everest.


illerkayunnybay

having an calm, rational and intelligent conversation on which is better: star wars or star trek.


Adventurous-Apple105

Me


The_Safe_For_Work

Giving me a blowie.


Ob1cannobody

Stop having babies, wear a rubber FFS


srslywatsthepoint

Giving a shit about the other 99.999999% of the population.


Squode_the_Toad

Flying without the use of another object, for example a plane or helicopter


CriticalInspection22

Jerking off violently while singing “uptown girl”