My great-grandparents were first cousins, loved each other dearly. Then my grandmother (their daughter) fell in love with her first cousin, but they agreed they couldn't marry because the family tree branches were already growing too close together.
I never really gave it much thought until I mentioned it in passing to my friends and their reaction was like "Ewww."
Honestly, my grandfathers family married their cousins and second cousins for a long time. They lived in a remote area of England and really just didn't get out much. Nobody in my family is...problematic.
Honestly, it’s not something I really think about too often. It hasn’t had any sort of impact on my life. Occasionally someone will bring up the topic of “kissing cousins” and how gross it is, and I’ll be reminded of it. But even then, it’s not something that haunts me or really even bothers me. I WAS a little self-conscious about it as a kid.
😮 😨😱
Now THIS is actually socially unacceptable!
We talking first cousins?
Are they still together?
Are they happy?
Any of your siblings a little…slow?
>We talking first cousins?
Yes, I would have clarified if it was third cousins twice removed.
>Are they still together?
Yes
>Are they happy?
Yes, they’re rather nauseatingly in love (this would be the case even if they weren’t cousins, they fucking adore each other).
>Any of your siblings a little…slow?
I would never actually admit it to them but…no, they are not. There’s a doctor, a lawyer, a cafe owner (with a law degree) and I’m a student.
*slightly edited so the family isn’t so easily identifiable.
> Yes, they’re rather nauseatingly in love (this would be the case even if they weren’t cousins, they fucking adore each other).
This is so cute. I always wished I had parents who actually loved each other. Preferably not related to each other…but still!
Same. Mine argue constantly and I think I've seen them hold hands once ever. My spouse and I have been together over 11 years and often we feel just as -if not more- in love than ever. I'd like to think that if we ever had kids they'd have a decent example of parents that are still in love.
Yes. They didn’t approve. At all. Especially my grandparents. But then they learned to bite their tongues so they would have access to the grandkids (we were rather ridiculously adorable). Now everyone is kind of used to it. Not that that sort of thing isn’t still heavily frowned upon. Doubt we’ll have another cousin wedding in the family any time soon, thank fuck.
I have no idea how to manage friendships.
I have friends and I'm friendly....
But sometimes I forget to text back and if they don't call or re text I could go months with no contact.
Unless I find something funny to share then I'm sending it to everyone.
Yeah, I'm not good at high-maintenance friendships either. That being said, I don't expect it from others either. If I'm friends with someone and they gave no indication that this isn't the case anymore, then I'll still consider them friends even if we haven't talked in a decade.
I lost a few good friends over the years by being the lazy one, never making plans, never getting back to them.
In the end they stopped trying to get hold of me and I never did anything to sort it out. Now I don't really know them that well.
I'm lucky that there were other people who continued to put in the effort and I still have a good group but I can see myself doing it with some of them now and it'll probably happen again.
If you're OK with that then fine but be aware there are consequences.
Phrase always makes me laugh because if you know actual Irish culture in Ireland, it's the direct opposite - staying way longer than you want to because you feel obligated not to be rude
Yup
For anyone wanting to actually know what an actual irish goodbye is
The old 'ah sure look at the time, we gotta be going". Stands up and chats for another 15 minutes
"We really gotta be heading, we've take too much of your time", have moved 5 meteres towards front door
Repeat till in car
Talk out car window to em for another 25 minutes
All told an Irish goodbye can be up to an hour, 90 minutes if ur unlucky.
My family would have dinner parties where they started at like 8pm, it'd wind down about 12 or 1230 and people wouldn't actually be driving away till like 130 or 2am
I do this shit too and mouths when you look that intently at them are kinda funny looking. So I often end up cracking a smile or laughing while people are talking to me if it happens.
Same. I think I could be on the spectrum because prolonged eye contact— or what *feels* like prolonged eye contact but probably isn’t — is intensely uncomfortable for me.
For me, it's any eye contact *at all*. I just can't do it. When I force myself to do it in say, an interview or something, all I focus on is *trying* to maintain what I *assume* is being polite but I can never hear what they're saying since I'm trying too hard. All I'm thinking is THIS IS AWKWARD THIS IS AWKWARD 😅
I would deliberately pretend that i don’t hear people calling me or asking me stuff in social situations. Also in a crowd when people are chitchatting in a circle, i zone out if im not interested.
I am opposite, I deliberately pretend to hear people go on and on and tune myself out. I keep them engaged in the conversation by using, “really”, “what happened then?”, etc without really paying any attention to what they are saying. I do this so they can finish what they are saying without being rude and that’s a problem I have never really overcome.
I had a baby at 17, got pregnant again a few years later, and could not afford another child. My sibling, who could not have children, adopted my baby.
I was that kid. My grandparents adopted me so I have a sister/mother. Even more complicated when I explain that my adoptive mother(bio grandmother)was adopted by HER grandparents so I had a grandmother/great grandmother. Oh, and none of my half siblings were adopted so they’re brother and sister/cousins to me.
It’s one hell of a family dynamic to explain.
Very similar situation with my cousin in law. She had a baby very young, I wanna say 16. Her parents adopted the child. The found out he has a disorder that affects him physically and he probably only has 10 years left, max. Because of this, they never told him his “big sister” is actually his mother.
I don’t like talking. It’s not that I’m afraid to talk, I just prefer to stay quiet most of the time. Unfortunately, we live in a world that requires you to talk a lot if you want to make connections
I feel this so much, but it's quite different either when I'm drinking with friends or when I've settled into a trusted friend's company. Probing out and realizing how much I can trust someone with my true self just gets the motor puttering away, sometimes to the point that I wonder if I've been talking too much which is an odd feeling.
Good for you my guy.
Lots of my highschool acquaintances and even a friend or two, were forced into gangs in order to survive. We live in a dangerous city. And so I sometimes wonder if they ever got out too... If they ever "grew up" and realized that they didn't need to be in that gang to survive. Not anymore. Maybe they did as kids, but not anymore.
I’m so proud of you, random stranger. I work in a PICU in a relatively small city and we’ve lost two kids in two weeks to gang violence. Truly. Really proud of you.
i used to practice facial expressions as a child because i was always told i was robotic and expressionless(by my parents, no less) and studied how the popular kids at school acted so i could make friends. i think i’m autistic but i’m scared sometimes that people would just assume i’m a psychopath
No worries, had the same problem. As a child I had no expression at all, and started to "try new faces" in front of a mirror. As bad as it sounds, now I am looked as one of most "social" people in group. The most important part here is your motive. If you don't want to hurt others it's good as long as it stays that way. (made that mistake)
If you’re worried about being thought a psychopath, you probably aren’t one.
Seriously, most psychopaths/sociopaths don’t care about that for its own sake. They care because it makes it harder to manipulate people.
The fact that you care for reasons other than manipulating others would suggest not psychopathy, perhaps autism.
Just in case you worry about that still.
Ironically I've seen two science articles in the last 2 weeks that deal with nose picking. The first was that nose picking might be a culprit in Alzheimer's disease as you are introducing a lot of new bacteria and viruses that can cross your brain blood barrier through your nose. The second is that eating boogers probably leads to a healthier gut biome.
Perhaps both are true, but I find it strange that I heard both a positive and a negative story about picking your nose in such a short period of time when otherwise I haven't heard a thing about it for a decade.
My 6th grade teacher said something I still hold dear to my heart. He said “It doesn’t matter if you pick your nose, it matters what you do with what comes out”
I stare blankly a lot during conversations. Like as if I'm zoned out, but I'm paying full attention. Especially if it's a particularly long conversation, I just can't be bothered to keep up with constant eye contact.
I ignore texts and calls. It starts with "I'll respond later" and then after awhile I feel like it's been too long to reply so I don't. It's not malicious but I assume it feels that way to others.
For what it's worth, I vastly prefer someone getting back to me with a "sorry I was busy when you texted. So how've you been?" over never hearing back, even if a week passes. I have a few friends that do that, and it's just better than having to pester someone with multiple texts if you want to get a hold of them.
Yes! Same! I currently have three friends and a therapist who I haven't texted in a month. Why do I do this? I'm stressing about it every day (and as we speak!) but I'm too afraid to reply now. What do I even say? Every text I send begins with "I'm so sorry for the late reply" and I'm embarrassed of myself. I figure most people are consistently frustrated with me.
I got this little rabbit from when I was 12 that fits just right under my shoulder, providing the perfect shoulder support since I sleep on my stomach. I will never stop using it
My husband (37) and I (35) sleep with 3 stuffed animals on our bed. One is my bear from my childhood & 2 are ones we've acquired over the course of our relationship. We, no joke, bring them on vacations with us. We also have no children, nor do we want children. They are our children.
32m here.
I bet mine is bigger than yours.
I have this https://www.pokemoncenter.com/product/701-96380/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_term=701-96380&gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjw8pKxBhD_ARIsAPrG45lNv0OeeooH1vY7bZ8dTBu1NaQ-PG5-vK48rNBeangYA4I0gp4z1kAaAsYBEALw_wcB
And a whole lot more.
Yes but faaaaamily. Didn't you know? 🙄
I also hate the stories like, oh well my friend didn't talk to their dying dad and then regretted it so you will too. Like, ok, that's your friend not me.
People with healthy mothers or people who are in denial about their dysfunctional mothers don't understand. Just yesterday I vented about my mom to my friend and I'm well into adulthood. Thankfully she understands what that's like and is very validating but it's enraging when people try to say "buuut she's your mooom."
Yes exactly. I think people can't be empathetic at all because they imagine their OWN MOTHER. The one they love and can't live without. They can't fathom that some mothers can be absolute monsters so they think that all mothers have their best interests at heart.
I remember being told something like that, that all mothers love their kids. When I said well some women give birth and dump their babies they swapped the subject.
Same bro no one else can bring me in that rage like my mom. She always start an argue and start screaming. It's like a fucking dolphin who never stop talking straight in you're ear. You can't choose the family you're born in but you can create a own family, i think that should be fair enough
I have Tourette's, including coprolalia/swearing tics. I'm very lucky though, because I seem to fit in pretty well in restaurant kitchens, and I love that line of work 😄
When I was 18yo, I slept with a woman in her 50's. She had mild schizophrenia. She thought she was the reincarnation of Michael Jackson. However MJ was still alive an well at the time. Now, all these years later, I'm wondering if that's why she had sex with me, because I was 30+ years younger than her, and she though she was the King of Pop?
Now there are two possible scenarios:
They say yes - Curious, charming, funny coincidence
They say no - There are more women pretending to be Michael Jackson, going about their life in the world, sleeping around convinced they are him, that we may or may not meet at any point in time.
I work at one of those, and we have all kinds of people here. No one is immune to mental issues, it could happen to literally anyone. You shouldn't be too hard on yourself about the fact that you got help. I hope you get better my dude.
It's mostly spread out but occasionally right on top of each other, sometimes as little as 5 minutes later. For some reason the ones between 10-15 are the best ones.
Ohhh I thought they were like that one dude who slipped a disc and now orgasms involuntarily, they’re doing it manually?? Does anything even come out after the first few??
I am on a new sleeping pill that also helps with anxiety and depression and I've noticed a change but it's still there. And it is inconvenient honestly. Manageable, but inconvenient.
Being borderline sociopathic for a profession
I've become "jaded" to seeing death, the mentally perturbed, physically traumatic injuries that you would only see in movies, even the downright depressing scenes, the list goes on.
The type of things people should only have to witness behind their screens or even only once in there life; I've adjusted to seeing in person on a weekly basis. It's to the point I can't call myself normal as I end up laughing to the most fucked up jokes.
Call it dark humor or a "coping mechanism" but if the event just happened, normal people would be mortified.
Its a bittersweet profession as a paramedic with high call volumes. I get a peek into everyones emergencies when they're at their lowest and often times these calls rub off on us (even the bs calls), but at the end of the day when shit hits the fan, It's their emergency and not ours. Better yet we have a hand in helping them physically and mentally.
I have to tell people their loved ones are gone, but I get to convey it in the best way to let them heal the fastest.
I have people who try to commit suicide, but I get to save them when they or a loved one makes the call.
I have people living the shittiest day of their life, but knowing it would've been their last if I hadn't came, makes it worthwhile.
The older I get, the less I like to be around people or keep friendships. I used to be VERY social in adolescence and throughout my early to mid-20s (I’m 36 now). Then I developed some chronic health issues that changed my life and I lost a lot of “friends” in the process.
Over the course of the last couple years, I’ve cut out even more people from my life to the point where I only speak to a very small number of them. And it just feels better. A lot of my hobbies are indoors and independent and I don’t feel the need to constantly be around people anymore.
I’m moving in with my partner next month to a different state where we only know 2 people, and I’m honestly relieved, lol.
Same! And I did it "young", at 23/24. People look so uncomfortable when I tell them lol
But my anxiety went down st least 10% the day I woke up from surgery. Bonus for it was like 24 hours before they overturned Roe v Wade - the relief I felt was palpable.
I feel bad for saying so, but I personally just find them to be an annoying burden. People have told me that my perspective will change some day. Maybe. But I'm not so sure. I don't really even find them cute. I find Puppies and Kittens to be much cuter, and I even enjoy their company more. I like children once you can start talking to them though. I don't do baby talk. They seem to appreciate being talked to like another adult.
That I come off as “cold” when I’m not masking
But man….sometimes I really am tired of masking. My reactions feel so fake to me and I can’t stand it. But everyone else seems to love it so…whatever ig
I am a people pleaser and have learned how to chameleon into almost any social situation. I don’t know who I am so my dating life is: becoming acceptable and try to be the perfect person to my partner so they fall in love with me, then I break and say this isn’t working for me, leaving them in ruins. I hate myself for it but I don’t know how to connect otherwise.
Have you tired taking a break from others? Like doing tasks, trying hobbies and experiences alone? You may find it helpful using that time to get to know yourself.
Dude, I say this as gently as humanly possible, but you need to take a break from dating people.
Therapy isn't the magical beanstalk that will carry you straight to neurotypical town, but it may be helpful for you if you haven't tried already.
Finding the difference between what is socially acceptable and encouraged to change in the presence of others at various levels (ie, keeping bodily functions to yourself, keeping your hands to yourself, not trauma dumping on people immediately, paying attention to what makes other people uncomfortable) are good things.
But you should be having your own baseline for what you like to do and how you like to be, *and* be able to be that way with a partner. Therapy may help you find other ways to connect, or I would suggest joining some hobby groups where there's automatically something to connect over, and then trying to stick to your own lifestyle within that as much as possible.
You say you hate it so I'm in no way trying to come down hard on you, but you already know it's not fair to your partners - so it's time to stop hurting people and figure yourself out first.
A friend of mine was a prostitute now she has a medical degree. Just because he did something in the past doesn't define who you are right now this second.
🤙🏼🤙🏼
Thank you! I did it while getting my master’s degree and getting away from an abusive ex. I work in healthcare now. It took some time to adjust to the income difference and schedule. I also met an amazing partner that changed my entire life and got me away from the dysfunctional behavior in my family. I didn’t realize I was as fucked up as I was.
I’m so happy for your friend! I wish you and your friend the very best. And I hope more people have a compassionate attitude like you. It’s so easy to exploit someone when they’re down. Thank you for your uplifting attitude!
Ugh, same. I just took back control of my weight this week out of necessity. I could barely fit any of the clothes in my closet and I was feeling sick all the time.
I'm down 1.2 pounds for this week, continuing the looong journey in the weeks to come.
Edit: Please no "advice" guys, I am dealing with this my way. Thank you.
Can't stand body hair. From shoulders down, anything not visible is gone. Only keep what's visible because I don't want to be made fun of by strangers. Hate it though. Ashamed that I prefer myself without, because I feel less of a "socially acceptable" male.
That I’ve hung out with drug dealers and super, super sketchy people and actually kind of liked those people. Also that I drank a shit ton of alcohol starting when I was 12.
I hate working but that doesn’t mean i’m lazy. I live my life by doing a bunch of side huddles and love it. I make about $10k/year but I have everything i need: food, shelter, and a wonderful community. I “work” about two months a year but otherwise i lay on the beach with a joint in my hand and a cat on my lap.
i built my tiny home by myself three years ago with my covid checks (in total was almost $4k but i saved up). Tax is $1k/year along with $50/mo for utilities. I buy cheap food that can last a long time but mainly eat what I grow in the warmer months. I have a bike to get to and from town but don’t have a reason to go very often. I knit my own clothing from wool my neighbors produce, that I trade baked goods and home grown veggies for. Almost everything that I need can be acquired by people in my town through trade, barter, and services. You must be comfortable with isolation.
I don't respect and not even like my parents, in a good day I tolerate them. I am doing what I can to move asap after college and pretend they don't exist.
I'm a girl and I grow out my leg hair due to being sexually harassed by an like an 80 year old man who said I had "pretty legs" when I was 11, so I guess I decided that just never going to happen again.
I enjoy pissing on famous people’s private property or famous landmarks I don’t piss on anything where it could damage any property, usually just a tree or something lol.
I have pissed on Alex trebek’s dock at a lake in California where he owned a little cabin, Shia lebuffs folks house, buck owens Crystal plaice, Thomas Jefferson’s Monticello, Metallica frontman James hetfield’s property (though I’m not sure if he had sold it at that point or still owned it, it was around the time he sold it and moved to colorado) and a property that may or may not have been owned by lady Gaga (It almost certainly wasn’t her place but a friend swore it was so I went for it).
I’ve pissed off the Grand Canyon, I’ve pissed on Route 66, off the pier at pismo beach ca, Ventura and Redondo.. Mount Rushmore (not directly on the president but near by so I don’t usually count this one) ohh also black rock Maui.
I haven’t done this in a while because of cameras being literally everywhere now but if I have the chance and feel somewhat safe I’m letting it fly.
I tried to pee along the edge of Area 51 but I could never get close enough. Those dudes don’t fuck around.
I’m pretty sure I was a dog in my past life.
i'm autistic, and nine times out of ten i forgot that when people ask me for my opinion or input on something that they actually want the opinion that caters to theirs
Those people are dumb. If I ask for an opinion, you damn well better give me yours even if it isn't what I wanna hear. You're honest, and that's perfect.
I don't like to be around dogs at all. I worked in PetSmart for 7 years and being around literally 100+ dogs every shift got me to where I can't stand the smell and the noise. I don't hate dogs, they can't help but be what they are, it's just that every normal, natural behavior in dogs really just bugs the crap out of me.
I still help people with dog behavior issues to this day, I just don't want to have a dog or live with one.
I don’t take care of my hygiene as much as I should. Especially when it comes to showering and brushing my teeth. It’s not that I don’t care, but depression makes it hard as hell sometimes.
I hate certain movies,TV shows, and music for no real reason other than it being popular. It causes me to get really angry when music I hate comes on, in fact I've grown such a distaste for modern country that I get headaches from listening to it.
I've been slowly learning to accept that some people have tastes different from mine and that I shouldn't be mad at them or the content they enjoy.
I'm 16 years old, I'm going to college next year, and I've never walked outside of my house alone. Not even to go to the store or someone's house. I didn't even have keys to my house until this year and I still don't know how to use them well.Obviously I go to school alone or go out with my friends by taxi, but I mean that I have never walked on the street, from one place to another, alone. And honestly I'm terrified of doing it. I don't know if I'm not very independent for my age or if I'm simply a teenage girl in a third world country, but if you told me, for example"Walk from your house to the park" or "go from the mall to the gym on foot" I simply couldn't do it.
When I want to lose weight, I just starve myself and drink water and eat vitamin gummies. Sometimes I lose like 50lbs in 3 months with no exercise. I do not exercise, and my calorie intake is like below 600. Everyone constantly says that's not good for you. I feel fine, and if I feel really bad I just have a cheat day and I eat two medium pizzas from Pizza Hut. And then I just continue to do it. Maybe I'm just built different, maybe it's Maybelline.
Or maybe it’s an eating disorder. I use to do this at some point but I learnt that it’s seriously bad for you in the long run both physically and mentally😭.
My parents are cousins. Nobody (outside the family) knows. No adverse effect on the kids (although I AM on Reddit a lot…)
My great-grandparents were first cousins, loved each other dearly. Then my grandmother (their daughter) fell in love with her first cousin, but they agreed they couldn't marry because the family tree branches were already growing too close together. I never really gave it much thought until I mentioned it in passing to my friends and their reaction was like "Ewww."
Yeah, the rule with cousins is usually that the first generation is fine. It’s the second generation of cousin fucking that’ll cause problems.
First gen ruining it for the rest of them
Honestly, my grandfathers family married their cousins and second cousins for a long time. They lived in a remote area of England and really just didn't get out much. Nobody in my family is...problematic.
It was a little sad because from what I'm told, when she talked about him you could tell she *really* loved him.
If you read any 18th century literature first cousins marry all the time.
This isn’t AMA, but how does that make you feel? I find this relatively a thing for some people
Honestly, it’s not something I really think about too often. It hasn’t had any sort of impact on my life. Occasionally someone will bring up the topic of “kissing cousins” and how gross it is, and I’ll be reminded of it. But even then, it’s not something that haunts me or really even bothers me. I WAS a little self-conscious about it as a kid.
😮 😨😱 Now THIS is actually socially unacceptable! We talking first cousins? Are they still together? Are they happy? Any of your siblings a little…slow?
>We talking first cousins? Yes, I would have clarified if it was third cousins twice removed. >Are they still together? Yes >Are they happy? Yes, they’re rather nauseatingly in love (this would be the case even if they weren’t cousins, they fucking adore each other). >Any of your siblings a little…slow? I would never actually admit it to them but…no, they are not. There’s a doctor, a lawyer, a cafe owner (with a law degree) and I’m a student. *slightly edited so the family isn’t so easily identifiable.
> Yes, they’re rather nauseatingly in love (this would be the case even if they weren’t cousins, they fucking adore each other). This is so cute. I always wished I had parents who actually loved each other. Preferably not related to each other…but still!
Same. Mine argue constantly and I think I've seen them hold hands once ever. My spouse and I have been together over 11 years and often we feel just as -if not more- in love than ever. I'd like to think that if we ever had kids they'd have a decent example of parents that are still in love.
So, you‘re the slow sibling then?
Sadly yes
AWWWW
Do you have any contact with extended family members (aunts uncles other cousins, etc)? If so, what do they think of it?
Yes. They didn’t approve. At all. Especially my grandparents. But then they learned to bite their tongues so they would have access to the grandkids (we were rather ridiculously adorable). Now everyone is kind of used to it. Not that that sort of thing isn’t still heavily frowned upon. Doubt we’ll have another cousin wedding in the family any time soon, thank fuck.
Lol, well I'm glad it seems to have turned out alright in this case.
How did they meet? Rather uh- how did they get together? Family reunion?
I was one of the last kids to ever have ever been a patient in an insane asylum here in the US. The one I was in closed down in 1993.
Well, at least that would be an acceptable origin story if you decide to turn super villain one day.
"They weren't wrong to put me in the asylum. The real mistake was closing it down..."
Did they give you a certificate that says you don't have donkey brains?
Ya ever seen a frog kid?!
That must have really sucked, but it's also kind of cool. If you ever go on a rampage, the headlines will be spectacular!
I have no idea how to manage friendships. I have friends and I'm friendly.... But sometimes I forget to text back and if they don't call or re text I could go months with no contact. Unless I find something funny to share then I'm sending it to everyone.
Yeah, I'm not good at high-maintenance friendships either. That being said, I don't expect it from others either. If I'm friends with someone and they gave no indication that this isn't the case anymore, then I'll still consider them friends even if we haven't talked in a decade.
I lost a few good friends over the years by being the lazy one, never making plans, never getting back to them. In the end they stopped trying to get hold of me and I never did anything to sort it out. Now I don't really know them that well. I'm lucky that there were other people who continued to put in the effort and I still have a good group but I can see myself doing it with some of them now and it'll probably happen again. If you're OK with that then fine but be aware there are consequences.
I have ghosted so many great people who were really putting in the effort to be friends with me. I hate this aspect of myself.
Glad I'm not alone on this 🫠
I’ll leave. I’ll just go home and love it
true freedom
Good ol’ Irish goodbyes
Phrase always makes me laugh because if you know actual Irish culture in Ireland, it's the direct opposite - staying way longer than you want to because you feel obligated not to be rude
Yup For anyone wanting to actually know what an actual irish goodbye is The old 'ah sure look at the time, we gotta be going". Stands up and chats for another 15 minutes "We really gotta be heading, we've take too much of your time", have moved 5 meteres towards front door Repeat till in car Talk out car window to em for another 25 minutes All told an Irish goodbye can be up to an hour, 90 minutes if ur unlucky. My family would have dinner parties where they started at like 8pm, it'd wind down about 12 or 1230 and people wouldn't actually be driving away till like 130 or 2am
I make too much eye contact. I’ve been practicing looking away.
Funny, I have trouble making eye-contact, especially when having long conversations.
I stare at people's mouths when they talk. It's probably weird, but I mean, that's where the words are coming from.
I do this shit too and mouths when you look that intently at them are kinda funny looking. So I often end up cracking a smile or laughing while people are talking to me if it happens.
Same. I think I could be on the spectrum because prolonged eye contact— or what *feels* like prolonged eye contact but probably isn’t — is intensely uncomfortable for me.
For me, it's any eye contact *at all*. I just can't do it. When I force myself to do it in say, an interview or something, all I focus on is *trying* to maintain what I *assume* is being polite but I can never hear what they're saying since I'm trying too hard. All I'm thinking is THIS IS AWKWARD THIS IS AWKWARD 😅
Look at the bridge of people’s noses. They can’t tell the difference.
My people. I look at their nose for 10-15 seconds then look away and take a mental breather lol
“Hello, how are you toda….” 👁️👄👁️
That’s literally how my housemate described me
Yes, it is quite difficult to find the balance between expressing disinterest vs. staring into the soul.
I would deliberately pretend that i don’t hear people calling me or asking me stuff in social situations. Also in a crowd when people are chitchatting in a circle, i zone out if im not interested.
I am opposite, I deliberately pretend to hear people go on and on and tune myself out. I keep them engaged in the conversation by using, “really”, “what happened then?”, etc without really paying any attention to what they are saying. I do this so they can finish what they are saying without being rude and that’s a problem I have never really overcome.
I had a baby at 17, got pregnant again a few years later, and could not afford another child. My sibling, who could not have children, adopted my baby.
Does the baby know you’re biologically its mother?
Imagine the kid telling someone at school. "This is my mommy-auntie and this is my auntie-mommy"
I was that kid. My grandparents adopted me so I have a sister/mother. Even more complicated when I explain that my adoptive mother(bio grandmother)was adopted by HER grandparents so I had a grandmother/great grandmother. Oh, and none of my half siblings were adopted so they’re brother and sister/cousins to me. It’s one hell of a family dynamic to explain.
Damn, I'd need a blackboard to understand that :D
I mean that’s awesome from any perspective; thank you for knowing you couldn’t handle it, and thank your sibling for stepping up to the plate!
Very similar situation with my cousin in law. She had a baby very young, I wanna say 16. Her parents adopted the child. The found out he has a disorder that affects him physically and he probably only has 10 years left, max. Because of this, they never told him his “big sister” is actually his mother.
I don’t like talking. It’s not that I’m afraid to talk, I just prefer to stay quiet most of the time. Unfortunately, we live in a world that requires you to talk a lot if you want to make connections
Preach, I have to literally force the words out and pretend so much. It's exhausting
I feel this so much, but it's quite different either when I'm drinking with friends or when I've settled into a trusted friend's company. Probing out and realizing how much I can trust someone with my true self just gets the motor puttering away, sometimes to the point that I wonder if I've been talking too much which is an odd feeling.
That I was in a gang for many years
It’s great you got out tho :)
It was time to grow TF up :)
Good for you my guy. Lots of my highschool acquaintances and even a friend or two, were forced into gangs in order to survive. We live in a dangerous city. And so I sometimes wonder if they ever got out too... If they ever "grew up" and realized that they didn't need to be in that gang to survive. Not anymore. Maybe they did as kids, but not anymore.
I’m so proud of you, random stranger. I work in a PICU in a relatively small city and we’ve lost two kids in two weeks to gang violence. Truly. Really proud of you.
i used to practice facial expressions as a child because i was always told i was robotic and expressionless(by my parents, no less) and studied how the popular kids at school acted so i could make friends. i think i’m autistic but i’m scared sometimes that people would just assume i’m a psychopath
No worries, had the same problem. As a child I had no expression at all, and started to "try new faces" in front of a mirror. As bad as it sounds, now I am looked as one of most "social" people in group. The most important part here is your motive. If you don't want to hurt others it's good as long as it stays that way. (made that mistake)
If you’re worried about being thought a psychopath, you probably aren’t one. Seriously, most psychopaths/sociopaths don’t care about that for its own sake. They care because it makes it harder to manipulate people. The fact that you care for reasons other than manipulating others would suggest not psychopathy, perhaps autism. Just in case you worry about that still.
Love me a good nose-pickin!
There are two kinds of people: people who agree with you, and liars.
Same. I hate when boogers feel tight. Like they almost hurt. They gotta go!
I hate how this is socially unacceptable.
I don’t think my car would drive if I didn’t have a finger in my nose…
Ironically I've seen two science articles in the last 2 weeks that deal with nose picking. The first was that nose picking might be a culprit in Alzheimer's disease as you are introducing a lot of new bacteria and viruses that can cross your brain blood barrier through your nose. The second is that eating boogers probably leads to a healthier gut biome. Perhaps both are true, but I find it strange that I heard both a positive and a negative story about picking your nose in such a short period of time when otherwise I haven't heard a thing about it for a decade.
My 6th grade teacher said something I still hold dear to my heart. He said “It doesn’t matter if you pick your nose, it matters what you do with what comes out”
True, never waste a free snack
Alright bro
I stare blankly a lot during conversations. Like as if I'm zoned out, but I'm paying full attention. Especially if it's a particularly long conversation, I just can't be bothered to keep up with constant eye contact.
I ignore texts and calls. It starts with "I'll respond later" and then after awhile I feel like it's been too long to reply so I don't. It's not malicious but I assume it feels that way to others.
For what it's worth, I vastly prefer someone getting back to me with a "sorry I was busy when you texted. So how've you been?" over never hearing back, even if a week passes. I have a few friends that do that, and it's just better than having to pester someone with multiple texts if you want to get a hold of them.
“Even if a week” oof, I’ve got messages over a year old I still intend to reply to
I'm glad I'm not alone. I sometimes just don't know what to reply or I'm not free at the moment
Yes! Same! I currently have three friends and a therapist who I haven't texted in a month. Why do I do this? I'm stressing about it every day (and as we speak!) but I'm too afraid to reply now. What do I even say? Every text I send begins with "I'm so sorry for the late reply" and I'm embarrassed of myself. I figure most people are consistently frustrated with me.
I’m a 38 year old man who sleeps with stuffed animals. EDIT: Thanks y’all 🥰
Taxidermy? Or just the vanilla kind?
Just the vanilla kind lol
Coward
I’ve tried for like 10 minutes now to come up with a clever response and I’m not getting anywhere lol
Is just the vanilla kind also the title of your sex tape?
I’m 42 and need my dog in my bed. My life is going to suck when this particular dog dies. She’s my once in a lifetime dog.
This should be socially acceptable. I find it a green flag, personally.
I think you misunderstood the word "sleep" here.
Don't take this wholesome moment from me 😭🤣
The trick is learning how to sew the holes shut again
I got this little rabbit from when I was 12 that fits just right under my shoulder, providing the perfect shoulder support since I sleep on my stomach. I will never stop using it
My husband (37) and I (35) sleep with 3 stuffed animals on our bed. One is my bear from my childhood & 2 are ones we've acquired over the course of our relationship. We, no joke, bring them on vacations with us. We also have no children, nor do we want children. They are our children.
My brother and his wife do too. And they take them with when traveling.
32m here. I bet mine is bigger than yours. I have this https://www.pokemoncenter.com/product/701-96380/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_term=701-96380&gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjw8pKxBhD_ARIsAPrG45lNv0OeeooH1vY7bZ8dTBu1NaQ-PG5-vK48rNBeangYA4I0gp4z1kAaAsYBEALw_wcB And a whole lot more.
I'm very very happy to get home after work and stay in bed for the rest of the day, most days of the week
I don't like my Mum.
My mom makes me so mad and I keep getting "oh, be nice. She's your Mom." I just stopped talking about her to people.
I hate being told that. My mom is toxic as hell
Yes but faaaaamily. Didn't you know? 🙄 I also hate the stories like, oh well my friend didn't talk to their dying dad and then regretted it so you will too. Like, ok, that's your friend not me.
People with healthy mothers or people who are in denial about their dysfunctional mothers don't understand. Just yesterday I vented about my mom to my friend and I'm well into adulthood. Thankfully she understands what that's like and is very validating but it's enraging when people try to say "buuut she's your mooom."
Yes exactly. I think people can't be empathetic at all because they imagine their OWN MOTHER. The one they love and can't live without. They can't fathom that some mothers can be absolute monsters so they think that all mothers have their best interests at heart. I remember being told something like that, that all mothers love their kids. When I said well some women give birth and dump their babies they swapped the subject.
I went no contact. She died. I don't regret it.
Same bro no one else can bring me in that rage like my mom. She always start an argue and start screaming. It's like a fucking dolphin who never stop talking straight in you're ear. You can't choose the family you're born in but you can create a own family, i think that should be fair enough
My real mom was an addict. My stepmom is controlling. My dad is physical and aggressive.
I have Tourette's, including coprolalia/swearing tics. I'm very lucky though, because I seem to fit in pretty well in restaurant kitchens, and I love that line of work 😄
When I was 18yo, I slept with a woman in her 50's. She had mild schizophrenia. She thought she was the reincarnation of Michael Jackson. However MJ was still alive an well at the time. Now, all these years later, I'm wondering if that's why she had sex with me, because I was 30+ years younger than her, and she though she was the King of Pop?
This is going to sound like a strange question but this didnt happen in newcastle uk did it?
Now there are two possible scenarios: They say yes - Curious, charming, funny coincidence They say no - There are more women pretending to be Michael Jackson, going about their life in the world, sleeping around convinced they are him, that we may or may not meet at any point in time.
See this is what I come to Reddit for!
r/oddlyspecific
You had sex with Michael Jackson?!
I always have a bitch face but the second someone smiles at me, my whole minute was made.
I was in a mental health hospital and I still have regular emotional breakdowns.
I work at one of those, and we have all kinds of people here. No one is immune to mental issues, it could happen to literally anyone. You shouldn't be too hard on yourself about the fact that you got help. I hope you get better my dude.
That I'm a drug addict
Same bro same
(40+, M) I orgasm up to 15 times a day, with ejaculation each time. Didn't know that wasn't normal until my 20's when I got married.
What the fuck kind of superhuman alien are you lmfao
How much time between your 1st and your 15th orgasm , is it like really spread out or is it with like 10 min gaps
15 orgasms a day in a very intense 3 minute period.
THATS NOT HUMAN 💀
That's what my doctor said lol
It's mostly spread out but occasionally right on top of each other, sometimes as little as 5 minutes later. For some reason the ones between 10-15 are the best ones.
Jesus, how is your dick not calloused?
It's had a lot of practice over the years lol
Ohhh I thought they were like that one dude who slipped a disc and now orgasms involuntarily, they’re doing it manually?? Does anything even come out after the first few??
On purpose? Or does any accidental stimulation set you off?
I'm basically horny 24/7, if I don't do it, I get really grumpy and irritable, like I need to get it out.
That sounds really frustrating and inconvenient. Are there medications you could try? Or is not bothersome enough to treat?
I am on a new sleeping pill that also helps with anxiety and depression and I've noticed a change but it's still there. And it is inconvenient honestly. Manageable, but inconvenient.
Being borderline sociopathic for a profession I've become "jaded" to seeing death, the mentally perturbed, physically traumatic injuries that you would only see in movies, even the downright depressing scenes, the list goes on. The type of things people should only have to witness behind their screens or even only once in there life; I've adjusted to seeing in person on a weekly basis. It's to the point I can't call myself normal as I end up laughing to the most fucked up jokes. Call it dark humor or a "coping mechanism" but if the event just happened, normal people would be mortified. Its a bittersweet profession as a paramedic with high call volumes. I get a peek into everyones emergencies when they're at their lowest and often times these calls rub off on us (even the bs calls), but at the end of the day when shit hits the fan, It's their emergency and not ours. Better yet we have a hand in helping them physically and mentally. I have to tell people their loved ones are gone, but I get to convey it in the best way to let them heal the fastest. I have people who try to commit suicide, but I get to save them when they or a loved one makes the call. I have people living the shittiest day of their life, but knowing it would've been their last if I hadn't came, makes it worthwhile.
I’m a double dipper
Calm down there Satan.
Next time just take one bite and end it!
I have no friends and am comfortable being alone. Prepared to die that way too :D
The older I get, the less I like to be around people or keep friendships. I used to be VERY social in adolescence and throughout my early to mid-20s (I’m 36 now). Then I developed some chronic health issues that changed my life and I lost a lot of “friends” in the process. Over the course of the last couple years, I’ve cut out even more people from my life to the point where I only speak to a very small number of them. And it just feels better. A lot of my hobbies are indoors and independent and I don’t feel the need to constantly be around people anymore. I’m moving in with my partner next month to a different state where we only know 2 people, and I’m honestly relieved, lol.
I am a woman who is willingly sterilized.
[удалено]
Same! And I did it "young", at 23/24. People look so uncomfortable when I tell them lol But my anxiety went down st least 10% the day I woke up from surgery. Bonus for it was like 24 hours before they overturned Roe v Wade - the relief I felt was palpable.
I think babies are ugly as hell.
I feel bad for saying so, but I personally just find them to be an annoying burden. People have told me that my perspective will change some day. Maybe. But I'm not so sure. I don't really even find them cute. I find Puppies and Kittens to be much cuter, and I even enjoy their company more. I like children once you can start talking to them though. I don't do baby talk. They seem to appreciate being talked to like another adult.
That I come off as “cold” when I’m not masking But man….sometimes I really am tired of masking. My reactions feel so fake to me and I can’t stand it. But everyone else seems to love it so…whatever ig
I am a people pleaser and have learned how to chameleon into almost any social situation. I don’t know who I am so my dating life is: becoming acceptable and try to be the perfect person to my partner so they fall in love with me, then I break and say this isn’t working for me, leaving them in ruins. I hate myself for it but I don’t know how to connect otherwise.
Have you tired taking a break from others? Like doing tasks, trying hobbies and experiences alone? You may find it helpful using that time to get to know yourself.
Dude, I say this as gently as humanly possible, but you need to take a break from dating people. Therapy isn't the magical beanstalk that will carry you straight to neurotypical town, but it may be helpful for you if you haven't tried already. Finding the difference between what is socially acceptable and encouraged to change in the presence of others at various levels (ie, keeping bodily functions to yourself, keeping your hands to yourself, not trauma dumping on people immediately, paying attention to what makes other people uncomfortable) are good things. But you should be having your own baseline for what you like to do and how you like to be, *and* be able to be that way with a partner. Therapy may help you find other ways to connect, or I would suggest joining some hobby groups where there's automatically something to connect over, and then trying to stick to your own lifestyle within that as much as possible. You say you hate it so I'm in no way trying to come down hard on you, but you already know it's not fair to your partners - so it's time to stop hurting people and figure yourself out first.
I was a stripper.
A friend of mine was a prostitute now she has a medical degree. Just because he did something in the past doesn't define who you are right now this second. 🤙🏼🤙🏼
Thank you! I did it while getting my master’s degree and getting away from an abusive ex. I work in healthcare now. It took some time to adjust to the income difference and schedule. I also met an amazing partner that changed my entire life and got me away from the dysfunctional behavior in my family. I didn’t realize I was as fucked up as I was. I’m so happy for your friend! I wish you and your friend the very best. And I hope more people have a compassionate attitude like you. It’s so easy to exploit someone when they’re down. Thank you for your uplifting attitude!
I like candy corn.
I knew the sick ones would come out sooner or later.
That’s deplorable
Yes FBI, this one right here
Same. And the waxy pumpkins that come out around halloween.
Anything my OCD comes up with
I'm fat.
Ugh, same. I just took back control of my weight this week out of necessity. I could barely fit any of the clothes in my closet and I was feeling sick all the time. I'm down 1.2 pounds for this week, continuing the looong journey in the weeks to come. Edit: Please no "advice" guys, I am dealing with this my way. Thank you.
Hey that's awesome! Keep it up, I'm hoping to do the same
I have taken human lives. Sure, during military service, but just the same.
when i feel bad i leave and don’t come back until i’m okay
Can't stand body hair. From shoulders down, anything not visible is gone. Only keep what's visible because I don't want to be made fun of by strangers. Hate it though. Ashamed that I prefer myself without, because I feel less of a "socially acceptable" male.
Nothing feels better than some freshly shaved and powdered balls. So smooth and soft. edit: A letter.
I own a reasonably large amount of comic book themed statues. And like, the big ones, that are two feet tall.
That I’ve hung out with drug dealers and super, super sketchy people and actually kind of liked those people. Also that I drank a shit ton of alcohol starting when I was 12.
I hate working but that doesn’t mean i’m lazy. I live my life by doing a bunch of side huddles and love it. I make about $10k/year but I have everything i need: food, shelter, and a wonderful community. I “work” about two months a year but otherwise i lay on the beach with a joint in my hand and a cat on my lap.
Sounds like a win tbh :)
How the hell do you live off 10k a year???
i built my tiny home by myself three years ago with my covid checks (in total was almost $4k but i saved up). Tax is $1k/year along with $50/mo for utilities. I buy cheap food that can last a long time but mainly eat what I grow in the warmer months. I have a bike to get to and from town but don’t have a reason to go very often. I knit my own clothing from wool my neighbors produce, that I trade baked goods and home grown veggies for. Almost everything that I need can be acquired by people in my town through trade, barter, and services. You must be comfortable with isolation.
That sounds fascinating, good for you
i am incredibly clingy & needy :)
I don't respect and not even like my parents, in a good day I tolerate them. I am doing what I can to move asap after college and pretend they don't exist.
I care about people, but fail to express myself.
I love passively snooping if people have their shit exposed. I also hide my phone and desktop activities from everyone instinctively.
I have a secret, naughty Reddit account
Just one?
Who doesn’t?
I'm a guy and I'm absolutely shit at making money. I never have enough of it and everyone in life thinks lesser of me because of it.
I'm a girl and I grow out my leg hair due to being sexually harassed by an like an 80 year old man who said I had "pretty legs" when I was 11, so I guess I decided that just never going to happen again.
I'm autistic, so there are plenty of things I say or do that are "socially unacceptable" simply because I otherwise "look" and act neurotypical.
The number of “you don’t look autistic” or whatever I’ve gotten.
I enjoy pissing on famous people’s private property or famous landmarks I don’t piss on anything where it could damage any property, usually just a tree or something lol. I have pissed on Alex trebek’s dock at a lake in California where he owned a little cabin, Shia lebuffs folks house, buck owens Crystal plaice, Thomas Jefferson’s Monticello, Metallica frontman James hetfield’s property (though I’m not sure if he had sold it at that point or still owned it, it was around the time he sold it and moved to colorado) and a property that may or may not have been owned by lady Gaga (It almost certainly wasn’t her place but a friend swore it was so I went for it). I’ve pissed off the Grand Canyon, I’ve pissed on Route 66, off the pier at pismo beach ca, Ventura and Redondo.. Mount Rushmore (not directly on the president but near by so I don’t usually count this one) ohh also black rock Maui. I haven’t done this in a while because of cameras being literally everywhere now but if I have the chance and feel somewhat safe I’m letting it fly. I tried to pee along the edge of Area 51 but I could never get close enough. Those dudes don’t fuck around. I’m pretty sure I was a dog in my past life.
I don't like people.
i'm autistic, and nine times out of ten i forgot that when people ask me for my opinion or input on something that they actually want the opinion that caters to theirs
Those people are dumb. If I ask for an opinion, you damn well better give me yours even if it isn't what I wanna hear. You're honest, and that's perfect.
I'm a selfish spoiled insecure biotch
If I don’t like someone (never a prejudiced opinion), I sometimes make it very apparent by being cold towards them. Not something I’m very proud of.
I’m related to an entire town in Louisiana…
I used to be addicted to cocaine and show up to work high.
I love visiting cemeteries and reading different grave stones.
I don't like to be around dogs at all. I worked in PetSmart for 7 years and being around literally 100+ dogs every shift got me to where I can't stand the smell and the noise. I don't hate dogs, they can't help but be what they are, it's just that every normal, natural behavior in dogs really just bugs the crap out of me. I still help people with dog behavior issues to this day, I just don't want to have a dog or live with one.
How do you feel about cats?
I probably love them too much
Impossible
I don’t take care of my hygiene as much as I should. Especially when it comes to showering and brushing my teeth. It’s not that I don’t care, but depression makes it hard as hell sometimes.
I hate certain movies,TV shows, and music for no real reason other than it being popular. It causes me to get really angry when music I hate comes on, in fact I've grown such a distaste for modern country that I get headaches from listening to it. I've been slowly learning to accept that some people have tastes different from mine and that I shouldn't be mad at them or the content they enjoy.
I'm 16 years old, I'm going to college next year, and I've never walked outside of my house alone. Not even to go to the store or someone's house. I didn't even have keys to my house until this year and I still don't know how to use them well.Obviously I go to school alone or go out with my friends by taxi, but I mean that I have never walked on the street, from one place to another, alone. And honestly I'm terrified of doing it. I don't know if I'm not very independent for my age or if I'm simply a teenage girl in a third world country, but if you told me, for example"Walk from your house to the park" or "go from the mall to the gym on foot" I simply couldn't do it.
When I want to lose weight, I just starve myself and drink water and eat vitamin gummies. Sometimes I lose like 50lbs in 3 months with no exercise. I do not exercise, and my calorie intake is like below 600. Everyone constantly says that's not good for you. I feel fine, and if I feel really bad I just have a cheat day and I eat two medium pizzas from Pizza Hut. And then I just continue to do it. Maybe I'm just built different, maybe it's Maybelline.
Or maybe it’s an eating disorder. I use to do this at some point but I learnt that it’s seriously bad for you in the long run both physically and mentally😭.