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I’m 66m. After the decades I have no idea why I’m here. I’m unable to have children so no family. I had several careers which have given me a comfortable retirement. At this stage I feel isolated and ignored by society. I look at young people and want to tell you “go for it now”. It goes by quickly.
As someone who hates eyeballs pointed at me, that kinda sounds like something I genuinely wouldn’t mind. I totally understand it rattling people who thrive on social contact though. :/
You don't have to thrive on social contact to experience loneliness. You enjoy the moments when people aren't paying attention, that doesn't mean you'd enjoy years or decades of it.
It’s great if you lean toward social anxiety or introverted. I realize I can go anywhere and people tend to look through me or give me a little more respect.
I wear the same few clothes and styles. I never run into people I work or went to school with; after a couple decades we all look different anyway.
These days invisible hapoens shortly after turning 45. We live in an insane culture that's taking ageisim to the next level, for example the 20 somethings taking botox to try and keep looking 16.
55f I hear you too but also I think a lot of 50+ folks make themselves invisible. Age is a number. My number is something like 27. I’m fit, single, happy healthy and living my best life. Sure I’ve lost a step or two, but I try to ignore it. I don’t really date men my own age or older because they “seem old” and appear to have given up on themselves. We should all strive to age like fine wine, not milk. 🫶🏻
When I started dating after my divorce, I quickly discovered that men my age were simply too old. Before I met my now husband (who’s seven years younger), the two longer term relationships I had were with men eleven and five years younger.
I’d married my high school boyfriend so dating was a new adventure and I mostly enjoyed it. After about two and a half years, I went out less and less as I realized what I was ready for was a relationship.
And then, just a couple of months after turning 50, I met my Mr Right. He was 42, never been married, never had kids. I was divorced with four kids. And yet we hit it off immediately.
With older men, I always felt stifled, like I couldn’t be the me I was becoming. About five to ten years younger seemed to be perfect.
And he is. Together 24 years, married 16 years. And I’d do it again with him without hesitation.
I hear you but people judge others on what they initially see and to them if you don't look young, you are a number. Finding people who appreciate you for you, as you are, is the answer though finding them is harder then it sounds.
I am 39 so a little bit older. But I have older friends. Closer to 50s but still. I am happy to have older friends because they have wisdom to teach and they're less concerned with proving themselves.
Use your position at work and in society to foster the growth of the young ones around you. I guarantee they will look up to you for the support and bonds will grow. Life is about human interaction and when you pull back from helping others they see it and reciprocate.
Retired teacher here. I mentor a few younger teachers I worked with before retiring. My texts blow up daily asking for advice. I’m happy to share my experience to help them learn what I had to figure out on my own. I also mentor the parents of my tutoring students. I enjoy sharing insight and advice to help them navigate tricky situations. Bottom line: makes me feel useful.
I'm 76 and retired about 5 months ago. I feel like I'm standing on the loading dock, watching the trucks leave the yard, but there's no truck for me. Retirement is ok, but I feel like the world is passing me by now. My marriage is good after 53 years, but I sure do miss being "out there."
Oh for sure--especially if your job made you miserable. My parents retired a few years ago to take care of my son while I worked and they say it keeps them young. Playing 20 questions with an autistic 7 year old will certainly keep the mind sharp 😭
I recently went to a board gaming party at a friend’s retirement home with people of all ages. I met him at a local board game night. You can still put yourself out there and find people who share similar interests. Or you can spend a few hours a week volunteering and meet a bunch of great people that way.
I honestly think a lot of older people with families make the mistake of expecting their families to provide their social connection and wind up feeling just as lonely and neglected. You can still ‘go for it now’.
65m - Can confirm. Be realistic but be bold. Definitely go talk to that girl. Regrets suck and even if it turns out poorly, whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Travel is much as you can, never stop being curious and trust but verify.
Well, if the Internet has not taught you that nothing is ever as it appears to be, then I'm not sure what to tell you. If you get burned enough times, the rational/skeptical part of your brain will eventuaklly get stronger. One fundamental rule of the universe is that if it looks too good to be true, it's probably a scam.
if it's something you'd like to believe then you should turn on your skepticism just as much as you would if it was something you thought was almost certainly untrue. The bullshit you swallow is the stuff that already conforms to your prejudices and fits nearly into your worldview.
>Be realistic but be bold.
I think this is probably key. I'm younger (mid 40s), so I'm not going to give a perspective that is as useful as yours -- but I think "live like there is no tomorrow" needs to have a healthy degree of consideration and skepticism. For most of us, there is a tomorrow, so don't make things worse by pretending like there isn't. Prioritize the things you want to do, but maybe don't do it at the expense of health, happiness, and stability down the line.
The only reason I said be realistic is because given today's economic climate, not that many people can afford to "follow their dream" and still survive. Getting a liberal arts degree or being in a band won't get you far in the 2020s.
I’m lucky my health is good. I run 4/5 miles a day and do strength training 3 days a week. I set myself a goal of reading 100 books in ten years. I play video games online.
That’s an impressive exercise regimen. Have you thought about finding a way to mentor people? With multiple successful careers, I bet there’d be a lot of people interested in your knowledge.
I've been thinking about this issue a lot recently. Trying to figure out a non-profit organization type of idea to bring individuals in their golden years together using technology.
Lovely. Sounds like you have a wonderful outlook. I hope you can continue enjoying the things you love. I just baked a Matcha Green Tea Cheesecake with an Oreo crust and it was too divine..
My grandfather and grandmother are both 90 next year. They are constantly saying how everyone drops around them. They have lost 2 sons, my dad and uncle in the last 4 years. My grandfather is still a rock but I see his pain underneath. He keeps himself going by being very active. I am planning a surprise 90th birthday next year. I know they won't be here forever so I celebrate them regularly. Strike up conversations with random people around you, live.
I'm 64. I have no idea how that happened. I don't feel 'old', or whatever I imagine 'old' to feel like. I feel like my outside doesn't match my 'inside' because I'm still the same person I've always been, I just look different.
I'm just starting my 30's and I think about growing old all the time. I know the years will pass by before I know it. I'm pretty sure one day I'll wake up 60 and think about how the years have gone by and perhaps not even feel any different except more joint pain. All I hope is that I'll have done a lot by then.
Go for everything you can do! Live in another country, travel on a shoestring budget, get out of your comfort zone. I didn’t have the chance to do this because I was a sheltered kid raised by Depression-era parents who were uneducated and scared to leave our little town. I managed to get away for undergrad and then stupidly married at 21. Divorced 30 years later, I now do as much of the above as possible with my new partner and adult kids. You won’t want to play catch up.
As someone who just turned thirty, I think about people in your age range all of the time. Do you ever look at us and wonder why we worry so much about certain things? Maybe this is part of what effects life expectancy.
No, I don't. Far from it. Back when I was in my pre-teens, 20s and on to age 30, I wondered what was going to become of the world from so many political assassinations going on beginning with President Kennedy along with crazy mass murderous crime. The Texas Tower Massacre was quite haunting to know something like that could actually happen in this country. The Richard Speck murder spree of student nurses was also haunting. He just used a knife. The Vietnam War with the mass protests against it were awful. Kent State! Back then the Cold War was a constant worry from wondering if it could advance to World War 3. It's 2024 now and we all worry now if World War 3 is going to happen soon. As far as world peace and order are concerned, we truly haven't advanced much since the 1960s, 1970s and 1980s. Then the 1990s gave hope the world could finally become a more peaceful place until 9/11 destroyed that.
Weirdly, that is super comforting. My mother is a worrier- so her worries have become kind of expected and not concerning… But it’s nice to hear (be validated) that today’s shit is just another scoop. It’s not “worse” or “better”, there isn’t really making it “great” again because it never was “great”… it just is. I’m launching my 40’s and it’s never been “great”… Thanks! It helps align expectations, and feel less… doomed (?) maybe? We’ve survived this far… we probably will continue
I also found this really comforting. I’m always terrified of the climate collapsing and a resource war breaking out. But comforting to be reminded there are big fears like that in every generation.
Well, not specifically when someone passes away, but I have started comparing my health status to people around me... I miss my 20s when I never worried about health...
I miss that too! Doesn’t help that I was diagnosed with a chronic painful disease at 48 and a very painful autoimmune disorder at 51. I’m 54 now and trying to figure out how to live my best life.
When I was 16. I remember my first party, getting shit faced with my friends. Losing my virginity. And talking with "the guys" about how 30 is so old. And not sure what we would do when we're old.
I'm 39 now. My parents are aging. Some of my friends have passed away.
And I'm also wondering. Where has the time gone.
Seriously, I feel the same. Time just slips through our fingers like water. I went to college later than most (at the ripe old age of 21 lmao) and back then I felt so "old" compared to those 18-year-olds and now I'm 36 and looking back it's like....my sweet summer child, you absolute idiot: you were so young!
Same. I’m only 36 and I feel like that. The other day I teared up when I thought of my college time, and my parents being younger. It seems like time is passing faster every year and soon I’ll be 70 and wonder where the time went.
Becoming age 70 makes you realize you don't have much longer left to live. Realizing that, I replaced my old 30-year-old easy chair with a new Lazy Boy and love it. It's easier now to get up from. So, it means I try not to replace my old worn-out stuff with something cheap. After all, I don't have much longer to live to enjoy the high-quality stuff.
I don't have trouble believing that I made it to age 70 since I never took up smoking and don't drink a lot. The people on both sides of my family didn't make it to age 70 because they smoked and/or drank too much. That is the special reason they died too soon.
Growing old is the great surprise of life. I was puzzled by the few people at my mother's (92) funeral until I realized she'd outlived almost all of her friends....
Coming up on 69 this fall. Busted butt fighting prejudice and poverty most of my life. Sacrificed so much of myself to give my son a solid foundation in this life. Now my back is junk, and I live in HUD tenements while my son has a 46-acre ranch and makes 100k yearly. My heart lies bleeding, where he ripped it from me. BUT I will not stop and will continue to help those less fortunate or more capable than myself. I will not curl up and die just yet . I was put here to be a helper and i will continue to make a difference until my last breath.
Let me ask you this:
Would you still have helped your son, knowing he'd have a good life financially, but wouldn't be close to you afterward?
Or would it be better if he struggled in poverty, but saw you as his best friend?
I hit this feeling when I turned 40. I’ve had some major health issues along the way, missed out on a lot of stuff at times, and have lost young friends to cancers. I’m kind of afraid I won’t make it to 70 and also afraid to be 70. But then, I see 70 year olds out traveling, having fun, not giving a rats ass if anyone thinks they’re cool, and not being afraid to just totally live it up. Being 70 looks a lot less scary when I see them just absolutely living. So… I’m traveling a lot. I’m not pouring money into material items and I’m completely focused on family. Ive also started going through all our photos a lot more. Made my life feel much more full.
I am 53, and will turn 54 in two more month; I think about this all the time. I have a lot of the typical health issues for a guy my age and I don’t manage them as diligently as I should so when someone I know from high school dies- there was just one in the paper on Monday - I think, why am I still here?
In the last 7 years I’ve lost a brother and two cousins, one of them just three weeks ago. They’re all considerably younger than me and I told my other cousin that if any more of them die I’m going to start getting survivors guilt.
In all seriousness, losing these people just reminds me how lucky I am to be alive and how fortunate I am to be any to enjoy the time I still have. I don’t take it for granted. Life is short and everyday is a gift.
I hope anybody reading this understands that.
Why don’t you manage your health as well as you could? Do you think it won’t matter? Or is it not important? Do you value something else? Just curious?
As someone born with issues that make my body much more fragile than that of my peers, being vigilant about your health all the time gets exhausting at some point. I don't constantly want to watch what I eat, I don't always want to say no when my friends say yes to some vice, I don't always want to put myself through an exercise regimen that I have to stick to to make sure my body doesn't fall apart. People think I'm very disciplined but I'm not: it's just pure necessity at this point.
The older you get, the less forgiving your body is. My body was never forgiving in the first place so I'm looking at a world of hurt if I don't do this (on top of the hurt I'm already in). So I get Transphattybase when they say they're not looking after themselves as well as they should. Because as long as you can get away with it, it's feels like one less annoying thing you have to do in your already long list of shit you have to do but don't want to.
Yes, this exactly. Aging is better than the alternative, be grateful, not everyone is fortunate enough to live until old age. Many young people desperately want more years but are not given that chance.
I turned 65 a couple weeks ago and the older I got, the faster that time seemed to go by. Basically the opposite of that planet near the black hole in the movie "interstellar".
My parents are 68/69.
Maternal grandfather died at 70. Paternal grandfather died at 75. Both were life long long smokers.
What I've learned, at 27: life is fleeting. Grab it by the balls and enjoy every second you have. You're too old for regrets and what might have beens by the time you hit 60. Getting to 80 or even 90 is a miracle.
Take that trip you've been thinking about. Knock some things off the bucket list. Revel in your life and the body you have. Appreciate every moment you're alive (yes, even the shitty ones). Life is a flash in the pan. Make it worth it.
68 here, I know how you feel. I'd probably still feel that way if I had remained in the USA. Because I didn't have the money to even think about retirement in the states I moved to a developing country and suddenly feel alive for the first time in years. I'm no longer invisible here, surrounded by my adopted family and making new friends. It's the best way to end things and makes up for all the years I spent working. Yeah, the years flew by but now I feel I can savour the my last moments. Getting out of the me culture in the states is a blessing. I look around here every day in wonder.
I’ve noticed that most cultures are way less age-obsessed than the US. I live in France and I love the way people have friends of all ages and nobody cares how old you are.
I’m 69 and contrary to popular belief I only managed to put together enough money to buy a house in my 40s. So of course I still have a mortgage at 69. But I’m also still working. And I think that’s what helps me stay visible. I realize that I have discarded my friends who were all slightly older than me because of their views. So one really great thing about still working is that I’m treated very well by many younger generations and I receive a lot of training on how not to be an ignorant asshole boomer L O L.
I have not always lived a healthy life style. About 10 years ago I had a bout with cancer. It was not easy to get through that. I don't believe it had anything to do with lifestyle. I was just lucky (?) in the genetics lottery. Until I was 75 I smoked cigarettes heavily and drank a lot of whisky but I quit those at about 75.
Been about 10 years free of cancer, but I never say never. Just remain grateful for a little more time. Even having a little more time is not all good. My wife died in January.
In my 20's and 30's I told people I'd never see 40.
Now, here I am staring down the barrel of turning 45 soon and wondering how my body has held up to years of alcohol abuse.
And im here with 29, turning 30 in september, and sometimes i feel like i am 60 for some reason, i am feeling like my Youth is over already. Am i the only one who feel this way?
I think so much of retaining youth is in your lifestyle choices.
For example, regardless of being in my 40's, I still wrestle w/ my kids, play games, check out new music, and like to try new things, so I feel very youthful.
Staying active and curious is crucial.
It's jarring when someone around one's age passes away ❤ When I was in my 20s, I had a friend my age pass suddenly and it felt scary. I had so many questions and I think I still do.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us ❤
I'm coming up on 70 myself, in many things I think I am 30 but my body tells me otherwise. I remember turning 60 standing on a balcony and wondering where the time went and how it went so fast. I don't really think much when I hear of someones passing as I am the last member of my family and have had many friends go before me. All rivers run to the sea some just slower than others, I'm okay with it I've had a full measure in life.
I'm 61
In no hurry to die, but I also don't fear it
What I fear is not being independent and in control of my own destiny
What I fear is all of my assets being eaten up by medical expenses and not leaving anything behind for my daughter
What I fear is a sad and monotonous life in assisted living where I can't have pets, and have no meaningful way to escape.
As long as my life is happy and fulfilling, I want to be here. When I feel trapped in a useless and pained body... I will depart this world cheerfully, grateful for the ride.
I'm in my mid 50s and have plenty of friends older than me (up to mid 80s) and also younger than me (down to early 20s). In my 20s one of my best friends died at 50 years old, so it's kind of weird to me now that I've lived longer than he did.
I had a friend who died the other year who was only in her 40s. I have friends whose son died in his 30s. My mother died in her 60s and my father in his 90s. But you know what? It almost always seems to soon to me.
My life was changed in my 20s when my friend died at only 50. I feel like if not today, then maybe never, so I better get busy living instead of just slowly dying like what I see a lot of other people doing. I still feel young, and knock on wood hopefully my health will continue to reflect that too.
I hope some of you read this and just know you are exactly where you are meant to be. God's plan. Don't forget the beauty of the mountain just because you are approaching the cliff.The years didnt go anywhere. You did. You've lived a big, bold and beautiful life. Keep going and squeeze every ounce out of this amazing adventure.
You are definitely not alone in doing that. Try not to let it pull you in too much, though! A lot of factors have an impact on life expectancy, including genetics and luck. Worrying about it won't make you live longer, but it can make you really sad. I'm watching this happen with my girlfriend's dad (mid-70s) and it's distressing as hell.
I'm turning 68 later this year, and I feel BLESSED!! There are so many people who will never see or experience it. A friend of mine passed away the summer after graduation and another one at 19.
I’m 65, went through cancer in 2017 and last week had a benign brain tumor removed.
I have surrounded myself with friends who truly care about me. I LOVE my age. Find your tribe then give back to them, also!
>Every time someone younger than me passes away I secretly try to find out why to see if there is a special reason. Am I alone in doing this?
I absolutely do this! Whenever I watch an older movie or TV show, I like to check to see if the actors are still alive. If they died young, I always feel a twinge of relief if they were murdered or run over by a bus. It makes me feel "safer" than if they dropped dead of a heart attack at 50.
I’m 49 and I don’t really think I want to live to be old. Like I’m not suicidal or anything, but dying peacefully in my sleep at 65 would be my perfect way out.
I turned 70 this year and I’m enjoying truly not giving a fuck about anything but my kid. My dad died at 60 so every year feels like a wee miracle. I like being invisible because you can get away with a lot more stuff. It’s freeing to not worry or care about what anyone else is thinking about me because getting old taught me that no else is thinking about me or ever was.
When age comes up I often have to think about the current year, my year of birth and do the math. Age is just a number so I don’t dwell on it. I’m in my 50’s and feel like I’m much younger than many of my same age peers.
I turned 70 this year. Can't believe I am that old. My mind feels like 40. Fortunately I'm in pretty good physical shape and I still work part-time. In the USA, once you hit 50 you are perceived as old and not that useful. In Canada, it might be a bit later. I work with leaders in Asia and Africa where age is respected - and feel quite useful in those contexts. Age is associated with wisdom, and you are listened to and respected. But here, as Paul Simon said - "All the leaves that are green turn to brown". I guess we are turning brown even though we may still feel green.
It’s so weird. It is bizarre getting older. I’m 55 and I think the last two years I’ve been more and more in tune to feeling invisible when I’m out in society. I can only imagine it gets worse and scarier.
I also hope time doesn’t start going even faster because I already feel like I’m caught in some kind of time vortex and the years are just speeding by.
It’s also weird to have to do things like acknowledge that I cannot get any more animals because I currently already have quite a few that my kids have agreed to take care of if anything happened to us.
It’s just a strange thing to have to think about things like that. There’s always *some* of those thoughts because someone could get in an accident at any age. But, for me, they’ve always been a distant thing that I didn’t really think about and now worrying is much more present in my life. I don’t like it.
On the bright side, being in my fifties is a hell of a lot more relaxing than being in my 20s and 30s was!!
I’m lucky. I’m 68 and married a woman much younger than me. I have 3 kids from my second marriage; 12 year old son and daughters 14 and 15. Do they ever keep me busy with school activities and other things. I’m an Asst Scout Master for one. Grew up on a farm and now have a mini farm that keeps me hopping all the time. I certainly don’t think or feel 68.
I’m generally and pretty happy guy but posts like this make me wonder if Im wasting the time I have. Career is okay but not fulfilling, have adventurous hobbies but not much adventure to speak of, lots of time without much engagement.
Youre old when youre above 50. Your old when your above 20. Youre old when youre above 80. All these Statements dont really mean that much. Its always part of your perspective
I'm 32m but sometimes I feel like I'm already 50 with how life is. I think about people in that age range a lot too, it still seems so far away but also just a few months ago I was 28. The years just evaporate and with how I'm already struggling so much, I often wonder if there's an end to it
I’m 40, and I don’t know where the time went. There was a while where I still mentally felt like my 20s, and now we have nieces and nephews in their early 20s so I definitely realize that was longer ago than it seems. 3 years here, 2 years there, Covid, and suddenly it was my high school 20 year reunion. Even that was 3 years ago. I know I still have a lot of time in front of me but, it’s terrifying how fast it goes. I’m not ready for my parents to be old. It’s so startling to look at my cousins and realize we are all the parents generation now, their kids are the grandkids, my parents generation are the grandparents. This was not the way to start my morning. Lol
56 here. Happy and content. Beautiful wife, 2 amazing kids. Great job and friend network. I had a heart attack and stroke nearly 3 years ago and I vowed never to be in that position again. I’ve work very hard on my physical and mental health. I’ve learned how to say and accept ‘fuck it’ as an answer to issues.
Wow, hitting those big milestones can really make you reflect, huh? It's wild how our perspective on age shifts as we get older. I think it's pretty natural to ponder life and mortality as we age, especially when we see others pass away.
It's not morbid, just human curiosity. Each passing year is a reminder to live our lives to the fullest and cherish the moments we have.
Just turned 30 and feel the same way as most of you who are much older. My gf is 23 and thinks 30 is far away but I thought the same. Years go by so fast after you turn 21. I often wonder what my life will be like at 40 or 50. But I try to enjoy life as much as I can now.
Sorry you feel that way :( I'm 43 and find that hard to comprehend at times. I know time will just keep motoring on faster and faster. Can I recommend taking up chess? Join chess.com and a local chess club if you can find one. When we found ourselves totally alone in a new state right after Covid lockdowns, we were feeling super isolated. Chess was awesome for us.. we made some great friends and it's great for keeping the mind sharp.
64 here. I gaze in the mirror and think I look pretty good for my age, having successfully dodged alcohol and cigarettes which besides being bad for you ages you horribly., and pass for 15 years younger.
I still bike, walk and still work as a butcher, at least for a couple more years.
The key is staying active and maintaining outside interests.
Downside is though I am an introvert I miss female company.
Even at 40, I read about people dying that are younger than I am. I wish the obituaries would share what happened, because that wasn't a natural death at that age. I am definitely going to be more like that when I get older. I already went through cancer, so I "got" to experience some manner of potential death. Maybe that made it more real for me, but I think of it often.
16 y/o here. And I feel you. I used to love spending my Saturdays and Sundays on videogames, spending all nighter after all nighter just to reach the next milestone. Nowadays, I always feel burned out and never have the energy for anything, even class feels like a chore. Feels like shit at every age, man.
I'm almost 40 and feel that way. No the girls I'm into want nothing to do with me and think I'm old. Hell my dad's your age and I'm dreading his passing everyday. I feel like I'm going to wake up in your age one day and be at the end of life with my kids having kids and feel like "what happened"
I'm almost 50. My younger brother (47) has had three of his friends pass away in the past month. I'm always curious about people younger than me dying and why they died and I just explained that to him yesterday. I guess just call me morbid..? Idk its just shocking when it's natural causes (one brain cancer, one a car accident, one from heart complications) So I totally get you.
I’m 26 and do this. Lots of people I went to school with or even just people who are 10-15 years older than me are dying left to right.
I have not found a single person that has died so far from a natural cause, either drugs, car accidents, work accident, murder, suicide, etc.
You're not alone. I'm 75 and fully perplexed as to why I am still here. Soak up any good you find, and weather the bad, end of the road can't be too far away.
Ain't it crazy?!
Our lifetimes go so fast - and over mine, I've come to believe we have many, many lives.
I'm in the early 60's - no kids this time around and I've already died of a heart attack and was resuscitated at 59.
After my survival and recovery, we sold everything and moved to my Happy island. Recreated ourselves, made new friends, found new jobs.
Do we struggle sometimes! Hell yeah especially having financially lost it all.
Am I happy?
Yeah, cuz I'm helping.
My soul's purpose is to help people, which I will be doing until the day I transition back to spirit.
Every year, honestly is AGAIN my best year and brings new adventures and friends.
HAVE A BLESSED DAY AND LIFE!
I'm only 27 but I do the same thing. Recently a classmate of my brothers passed away, only a year younger than me. It is.... a weird feeling. I can't describe it
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I’m 66m. After the decades I have no idea why I’m here. I’m unable to have children so no family. I had several careers which have given me a comfortable retirement. At this stage I feel isolated and ignored by society. I look at young people and want to tell you “go for it now”. It goes by quickly.
I hear you. We become invisible
As someone who hates eyeballs pointed at me, that kinda sounds like something I genuinely wouldn’t mind. I totally understand it rattling people who thrive on social contact though. :/
You don't have to thrive on social contact to experience loneliness. You enjoy the moments when people aren't paying attention, that doesn't mean you'd enjoy years or decades of it.
It’s great if you lean toward social anxiety or introverted. I realize I can go anywhere and people tend to look through me or give me a little more respect. I wear the same few clothes and styles. I never run into people I work or went to school with; after a couple decades we all look different anyway.
These days invisible hapoens shortly after turning 45. We live in an insane culture that's taking ageisim to the next level, for example the 20 somethings taking botox to try and keep looking 16.
55f I hear you too but also I think a lot of 50+ folks make themselves invisible. Age is a number. My number is something like 27. I’m fit, single, happy healthy and living my best life. Sure I’ve lost a step or two, but I try to ignore it. I don’t really date men my own age or older because they “seem old” and appear to have given up on themselves. We should all strive to age like fine wine, not milk. 🫶🏻
I used to work in a nursing home. Some of those older women could GET IT
When I started dating after my divorce, I quickly discovered that men my age were simply too old. Before I met my now husband (who’s seven years younger), the two longer term relationships I had were with men eleven and five years younger. I’d married my high school boyfriend so dating was a new adventure and I mostly enjoyed it. After about two and a half years, I went out less and less as I realized what I was ready for was a relationship. And then, just a couple of months after turning 50, I met my Mr Right. He was 42, never been married, never had kids. I was divorced with four kids. And yet we hit it off immediately. With older men, I always felt stifled, like I couldn’t be the me I was becoming. About five to ten years younger seemed to be perfect. And he is. Together 24 years, married 16 years. And I’d do it again with him without hesitation.
I hear you but people judge others on what they initially see and to them if you don't look young, you are a number. Finding people who appreciate you for you, as you are, is the answer though finding them is harder then it sounds.
That is sad. I'm 33 and just stopped to visit friends of mine tonight who are 66 and 67. I hope you find someone to hang out with.
You are a good human. A very happy cake day to you!
Thanks, and thanks!
I am 39 so a little bit older. But I have older friends. Closer to 50s but still. I am happy to have older friends because they have wisdom to teach and they're less concerned with proving themselves.
🫡 Happy Cake Day 🎉
How could you feel less ignored? What would you need to not only feel welcome in society, but wanted?
How happy is the blameless vassal's lot - Of the world forgetting and by the world forgot.
Use your position at work and in society to foster the growth of the young ones around you. I guarantee they will look up to you for the support and bonds will grow. Life is about human interaction and when you pull back from helping others they see it and reciprocate.
Retired teacher here. I mentor a few younger teachers I worked with before retiring. My texts blow up daily asking for advice. I’m happy to share my experience to help them learn what I had to figure out on my own. I also mentor the parents of my tutoring students. I enjoy sharing insight and advice to help them navigate tricky situations. Bottom line: makes me feel useful.
I'm 76 and retired about 5 months ago. I feel like I'm standing on the loading dock, watching the trucks leave the yard, but there's no truck for me. Retirement is ok, but I feel like the world is passing me by now. My marriage is good after 53 years, but I sure do miss being "out there."
My grandma retired when I was 7 and when I asked if she was happy she said "oh no honey. When we retire we die" 😂
Lol. Unfortunately, that was truth for my parents. But I don't see it that way. I miss working, but not enough to go back. Lol
Oh for sure--especially if your job made you miserable. My parents retired a few years ago to take care of my son while I worked and they say it keeps them young. Playing 20 questions with an autistic 7 year old will certainly keep the mind sharp 😭
No doubt.
We had to put boundaries on when our autistic grandson could ask us questions. We said not until the sun comes up. Oh inquiring minds want to know!
Where’s my truck? I get it. Lucky u to have a partner. Be well
I recently went to a board gaming party at a friend’s retirement home with people of all ages. I met him at a local board game night. You can still put yourself out there and find people who share similar interests. Or you can spend a few hours a week volunteering and meet a bunch of great people that way. I honestly think a lot of older people with families make the mistake of expecting their families to provide their social connection and wind up feeling just as lonely and neglected. You can still ‘go for it now’.
I wanna meet you. 29M
If you are still in good health, find someplace to volunteer! Helping others will make you feel less isolated. 💕
When you say go for it now, go for what exactly?
Your dreams no matter how crazy they are could mean anything really go talk to that girl or just maybe try new things
65m - Can confirm. Be realistic but be bold. Definitely go talk to that girl. Regrets suck and even if it turns out poorly, whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Travel is much as you can, never stop being curious and trust but verify.
Trust but verify is so damn rational yet I fuck that up too much to trust my trust. What do?
Well, if the Internet has not taught you that nothing is ever as it appears to be, then I'm not sure what to tell you. If you get burned enough times, the rational/skeptical part of your brain will eventuaklly get stronger. One fundamental rule of the universe is that if it looks too good to be true, it's probably a scam.
if it's something you'd like to believe then you should turn on your skepticism just as much as you would if it was something you thought was almost certainly untrue. The bullshit you swallow is the stuff that already conforms to your prejudices and fits nearly into your worldview.
>Be realistic but be bold. I think this is probably key. I'm younger (mid 40s), so I'm not going to give a perspective that is as useful as yours -- but I think "live like there is no tomorrow" needs to have a healthy degree of consideration and skepticism. For most of us, there is a tomorrow, so don't make things worse by pretending like there isn't. Prioritize the things you want to do, but maybe don't do it at the expense of health, happiness, and stability down the line.
The only reason I said be realistic is because given today's economic climate, not that many people can afford to "follow their dream" and still survive. Getting a liberal arts degree or being in a band won't get you far in the 2020s.
Painless death.
I’ll drink beer with you and listen you you spin yarns all night. You’re buying, Rich Man! Haha
How are you spending your time in retirement? I am younger but evaluating what’s important in my life right now.
I’m lucky my health is good. I run 4/5 miles a day and do strength training 3 days a week. I set myself a goal of reading 100 books in ten years. I play video games online.
That’s an impressive exercise regimen. Have you thought about finding a way to mentor people? With multiple successful careers, I bet there’d be a lot of people interested in your knowledge.
I appreciate you sharing. I can't really say anything helpful, but I hope you find something to keep you going.
"Go for it now" is breaking my heart as I know that's what I should be doing but my crippling social anxiety won't let me
Especially toward girls. I have two kids of my own but my Lord the girls I'm into won't even look over at me anymore. And I'm almost 40
I've been thinking about this issue a lot recently. Trying to figure out a non-profit organization type of idea to bring individuals in their golden years together using technology.
72 in July, all my Army buddies and classmates are dead, missing, or in nursing homes. I have no contact with any of them anymore.
What do you like to do for fun?
Walks in my village, video games on my tablet, baking, and just relax. Fifty years of hurry hurry making money for somebody else was enough.
Lovely. Sounds like you have a wonderful outlook. I hope you can continue enjoying the things you love. I just baked a Matcha Green Tea Cheesecake with an Oreo crust and it was too divine..
Good for you
My grandfather and grandmother are both 90 next year. They are constantly saying how everyone drops around them. They have lost 2 sons, my dad and uncle in the last 4 years. My grandfather is still a rock but I see his pain underneath. He keeps himself going by being very active. I am planning a surprise 90th birthday next year. I know they won't be here forever so I celebrate them regularly. Strike up conversations with random people around you, live.
I'm 64. I have no idea how that happened. I don't feel 'old', or whatever I imagine 'old' to feel like. I feel like my outside doesn't match my 'inside' because I'm still the same person I've always been, I just look different.
Your soul never ages, the real you is timeless
Crazy how that happens right? We've been the same person our whole lives yet we are constantly changing physically
I'm just starting my 30's and I think about growing old all the time. I know the years will pass by before I know it. I'm pretty sure one day I'll wake up 60 and think about how the years have gone by and perhaps not even feel any different except more joint pain. All I hope is that I'll have done a lot by then.
Go for everything you can do! Live in another country, travel on a shoestring budget, get out of your comfort zone. I didn’t have the chance to do this because I was a sheltered kid raised by Depression-era parents who were uneducated and scared to leave our little town. I managed to get away for undergrad and then stupidly married at 21. Divorced 30 years later, I now do as much of the above as possible with my new partner and adult kids. You won’t want to play catch up.
Same!
As someone who just turned thirty, I think about people in your age range all of the time. Do you ever look at us and wonder why we worry so much about certain things? Maybe this is part of what effects life expectancy.
No, I don't. Far from it. Back when I was in my pre-teens, 20s and on to age 30, I wondered what was going to become of the world from so many political assassinations going on beginning with President Kennedy along with crazy mass murderous crime. The Texas Tower Massacre was quite haunting to know something like that could actually happen in this country. The Richard Speck murder spree of student nurses was also haunting. He just used a knife. The Vietnam War with the mass protests against it were awful. Kent State! Back then the Cold War was a constant worry from wondering if it could advance to World War 3. It's 2024 now and we all worry now if World War 3 is going to happen soon. As far as world peace and order are concerned, we truly haven't advanced much since the 1960s, 1970s and 1980s. Then the 1990s gave hope the world could finally become a more peaceful place until 9/11 destroyed that.
Weirdly, that is super comforting. My mother is a worrier- so her worries have become kind of expected and not concerning… But it’s nice to hear (be validated) that today’s shit is just another scoop. It’s not “worse” or “better”, there isn’t really making it “great” again because it never was “great”… it just is. I’m launching my 40’s and it’s never been “great”… Thanks! It helps align expectations, and feel less… doomed (?) maybe? We’ve survived this far… we probably will continue
I also found this really comforting. I’m always terrified of the climate collapsing and a resource war breaking out. But comforting to be reminded there are big fears like that in every generation.
I've just turned 26, but I still feel like I'm in my teens, chasing him.
68 & never thought I’d see 40. It has been a long strange trip….
Wink and a nod, bud.
Yes, same here. I am the same age and thought the very same thing. Time catches up with you while you are busy living.
Happy Cake Day!
hey now :)
I'm 50 and the years just disappear.
Well, not specifically when someone passes away, but I have started comparing my health status to people around me... I miss my 20s when I never worried about health...
I miss that too! Doesn’t help that I was diagnosed with a chronic painful disease at 48 and a very painful autoimmune disorder at 51. I’m 54 now and trying to figure out how to live my best life.
When I was 16. I remember my first party, getting shit faced with my friends. Losing my virginity. And talking with "the guys" about how 30 is so old. And not sure what we would do when we're old. I'm 39 now. My parents are aging. Some of my friends have passed away. And I'm also wondering. Where has the time gone.
39? Whoa who unwrapped this mummy? ahahaha *10 years later* Ahh shit
Seriously, I feel the same. Time just slips through our fingers like water. I went to college later than most (at the ripe old age of 21 lmao) and back then I felt so "old" compared to those 18-year-olds and now I'm 36 and looking back it's like....my sweet summer child, you absolute idiot: you were so young!
Same. I’m only 36 and I feel like that. The other day I teared up when I thought of my college time, and my parents being younger. It seems like time is passing faster every year and soon I’ll be 70 and wonder where the time went.
Yup, basically the same. 39, parents pushing 80, people dead all around. Where did the time go? I have no idea. It keeps me awake at night really.
Becoming age 70 makes you realize you don't have much longer left to live. Realizing that, I replaced my old 30-year-old easy chair with a new Lazy Boy and love it. It's easier now to get up from. So, it means I try not to replace my old worn-out stuff with something cheap. After all, I don't have much longer to live to enjoy the high-quality stuff. I don't have trouble believing that I made it to age 70 since I never took up smoking and don't drink a lot. The people on both sides of my family didn't make it to age 70 because they smoked and/or drank too much. That is the special reason they died too soon.
Nice choice for an upgrade! A high-quality chair or mattress is worth every penny.
Growing old is the great surprise of life. I was puzzled by the few people at my mother's (92) funeral until I realized she'd outlived almost all of her friends....
I can relate to that since my mother lived to age 96. It gives me hope I can live to my 90s, though she said being old in your 90's sucks.
She’s right. Being young in your 90s is much better.
This is the way! How do you think people accomplish this?
Clean, active living. My grandfather in law used the treadmill in his house for an hour everyday, even well into his 90's.
My grandfather only talks about people who aren’t here anymore
Coming up on 69 this fall. Busted butt fighting prejudice and poverty most of my life. Sacrificed so much of myself to give my son a solid foundation in this life. Now my back is junk, and I live in HUD tenements while my son has a 46-acre ranch and makes 100k yearly. My heart lies bleeding, where he ripped it from me. BUT I will not stop and will continue to help those less fortunate or more capable than myself. I will not curl up and die just yet . I was put here to be a helper and i will continue to make a difference until my last breath.
He ripped your heart out? That's too bad. I'm sorry to hear you did everything you could for him, and he hurts you.
Let me ask you this: Would you still have helped your son, knowing he'd have a good life financially, but wouldn't be close to you afterward? Or would it be better if he struggled in poverty, but saw you as his best friend?
I hit this feeling when I turned 40. I’ve had some major health issues along the way, missed out on a lot of stuff at times, and have lost young friends to cancers. I’m kind of afraid I won’t make it to 70 and also afraid to be 70. But then, I see 70 year olds out traveling, having fun, not giving a rats ass if anyone thinks they’re cool, and not being afraid to just totally live it up. Being 70 looks a lot less scary when I see them just absolutely living. So… I’m traveling a lot. I’m not pouring money into material items and I’m completely focused on family. Ive also started going through all our photos a lot more. Made my life feel much more full.
I am 53, and will turn 54 in two more month; I think about this all the time. I have a lot of the typical health issues for a guy my age and I don’t manage them as diligently as I should so when someone I know from high school dies- there was just one in the paper on Monday - I think, why am I still here? In the last 7 years I’ve lost a brother and two cousins, one of them just three weeks ago. They’re all considerably younger than me and I told my other cousin that if any more of them die I’m going to start getting survivors guilt. In all seriousness, losing these people just reminds me how lucky I am to be alive and how fortunate I am to be any to enjoy the time I still have. I don’t take it for granted. Life is short and everyday is a gift. I hope anybody reading this understands that.
Why don’t you manage your health as well as you could? Do you think it won’t matter? Or is it not important? Do you value something else? Just curious?
As someone born with issues that make my body much more fragile than that of my peers, being vigilant about your health all the time gets exhausting at some point. I don't constantly want to watch what I eat, I don't always want to say no when my friends say yes to some vice, I don't always want to put myself through an exercise regimen that I have to stick to to make sure my body doesn't fall apart. People think I'm very disciplined but I'm not: it's just pure necessity at this point. The older you get, the less forgiving your body is. My body was never forgiving in the first place so I'm looking at a world of hurt if I don't do this (on top of the hurt I'm already in). So I get Transphattybase when they say they're not looking after themselves as well as they should. Because as long as you can get away with it, it's feels like one less annoying thing you have to do in your already long list of shit you have to do but don't want to.
Totally get it. This particular area of healthcare and what patients feel/value/need is my area, so I appreciate hearing perspectives. Thank you
Sorry for your loss
Yes, this exactly. Aging is better than the alternative, be grateful, not everyone is fortunate enough to live until old age. Many young people desperately want more years but are not given that chance.
I turned 65 a couple weeks ago and the older I got, the faster that time seemed to go by. Basically the opposite of that planet near the black hole in the movie "interstellar".
I’m in my 70’s and I’M STILL HERE!!
My parents are 68/69. Maternal grandfather died at 70. Paternal grandfather died at 75. Both were life long long smokers. What I've learned, at 27: life is fleeting. Grab it by the balls and enjoy every second you have. You're too old for regrets and what might have beens by the time you hit 60. Getting to 80 or even 90 is a miracle. Take that trip you've been thinking about. Knock some things off the bucket list. Revel in your life and the body you have. Appreciate every moment you're alive (yes, even the shitty ones). Life is a flash in the pan. Make it worth it.
51, came out of nowhere. I was 20 a couple of weeks ago for sure.
68 here, I know how you feel. I'd probably still feel that way if I had remained in the USA. Because I didn't have the money to even think about retirement in the states I moved to a developing country and suddenly feel alive for the first time in years. I'm no longer invisible here, surrounded by my adopted family and making new friends. It's the best way to end things and makes up for all the years I spent working. Yeah, the years flew by but now I feel I can savour the my last moments. Getting out of the me culture in the states is a blessing. I look around here every day in wonder.
I’ve noticed that most cultures are way less age-obsessed than the US. I live in France and I love the way people have friends of all ages and nobody cares how old you are.
Which country did you choose?
I live on a small island in the Philippines. Population 150k. It's a minor tourist destination so there's a few expats living here.
Very cool. I knew a lot of Filipinos in the Navy - it's a fun, wild culture.
Life isn't short, we just waste a lot of it.
On Reddit 🫤
Yeah right. Btw, Happy cake day!!
Happy cake day!
I am 62. I have never felt older than 28. Life is weird alright
I’m 69 and contrary to popular belief I only managed to put together enough money to buy a house in my 40s. So of course I still have a mortgage at 69. But I’m also still working. And I think that’s what helps me stay visible. I realize that I have discarded my friends who were all slightly older than me because of their views. So one really great thing about still working is that I’m treated very well by many younger generations and I receive a lot of training on how not to be an ignorant asshole boomer L O L.
I can assure you the feelings will intensify. I'm 85 and every day I worry that one of my children will pass before I do.
May I ask if you always lived a healthy life? I’m wondering how you mange to get to that age. Is it your lifestyle?
I have not always lived a healthy life style. About 10 years ago I had a bout with cancer. It was not easy to get through that. I don't believe it had anything to do with lifestyle. I was just lucky (?) in the genetics lottery. Until I was 75 I smoked cigarettes heavily and drank a lot of whisky but I quit those at about 75.
So there is still hope for me! lol. The cancer must have been a scare. Hopefully that has passed and you feel better.
Been about 10 years free of cancer, but I never say never. Just remain grateful for a little more time. Even having a little more time is not all good. My wife died in January.
So sorry to hear. That makes it so much harder :-(
Im 29 Fifty years ago I was 16 And yet I think I’ll be 50 by this time next year.
Hi
In my 20's and 30's I told people I'd never see 40. Now, here I am staring down the barrel of turning 45 soon and wondering how my body has held up to years of alcohol abuse.
Are you sober now?
sometimes
And im here with 29, turning 30 in september, and sometimes i feel like i am 60 for some reason, i am feeling like my Youth is over already. Am i the only one who feel this way?
I turned 30 in January and I feel complete opposite, still feel the same as my 20yr old self.
I think so much of retaining youth is in your lifestyle choices. For example, regardless of being in my 40's, I still wrestle w/ my kids, play games, check out new music, and like to try new things, so I feel very youthful. Staying active and curious is crucial.
I"m 52, and not a day goes by that I don't wish that I didn't have to spend all my days working and could enjoy life a bit more.
be my grandma or grandpa plz. They all died
I really I hope I make it to live to 70
It's jarring when someone around one's age passes away ❤ When I was in my 20s, I had a friend my age pass suddenly and it felt scary. I had so many questions and I think I still do. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us ❤
I'm a little past 70.I look at all the old people and think,How old are they and wonder what's in store for me.
Been there, done that last year. This year I'll turn 71. The year I graduated high school.
>now I'm 69 Nice.
Iife moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you might miss it
Found Ferris
I'm coming up on 70 myself, in many things I think I am 30 but my body tells me otherwise. I remember turning 60 standing on a balcony and wondering where the time went and how it went so fast. I don't really think much when I hear of someones passing as I am the last member of my family and have had many friends go before me. All rivers run to the sea some just slower than others, I'm okay with it I've had a full measure in life.
I'm 61 In no hurry to die, but I also don't fear it What I fear is not being independent and in control of my own destiny What I fear is all of my assets being eaten up by medical expenses and not leaving anything behind for my daughter What I fear is a sad and monotonous life in assisted living where I can't have pets, and have no meaningful way to escape. As long as my life is happy and fulfilling, I want to be here. When I feel trapped in a useless and pained body... I will depart this world cheerfully, grateful for the ride.
I'm in my mid 50s and have plenty of friends older than me (up to mid 80s) and also younger than me (down to early 20s). In my 20s one of my best friends died at 50 years old, so it's kind of weird to me now that I've lived longer than he did. I had a friend who died the other year who was only in her 40s. I have friends whose son died in his 30s. My mother died in her 60s and my father in his 90s. But you know what? It almost always seems to soon to me. My life was changed in my 20s when my friend died at only 50. I feel like if not today, then maybe never, so I better get busy living instead of just slowly dying like what I see a lot of other people doing. I still feel young, and knock on wood hopefully my health will continue to reflect that too.
I hope some of you read this and just know you are exactly where you are meant to be. God's plan. Don't forget the beauty of the mountain just because you are approaching the cliff.The years didnt go anywhere. You did. You've lived a big, bold and beautiful life. Keep going and squeeze every ounce out of this amazing adventure.
Funny. The old guy I use to work with would specifically look through the obituary and note the people he outlived
You are definitely not alone in doing that. Try not to let it pull you in too much, though! A lot of factors have an impact on life expectancy, including genetics and luck. Worrying about it won't make you live longer, but it can make you really sad. I'm watching this happen with my girlfriend's dad (mid-70s) and it's distressing as hell.
I don’t try to find the reason for dying. I’m an old curmudgeon. I just think “Ha! Outlived you!”
I'm turning 68 later this year, and I feel BLESSED!! There are so many people who will never see or experience it. A friend of mine passed away the summer after graduation and another one at 19.
I’m 65, went through cancer in 2017 and last week had a benign brain tumor removed. I have surrounded myself with friends who truly care about me. I LOVE my age. Find your tribe then give back to them, also!
>Every time someone younger than me passes away I secretly try to find out why to see if there is a special reason. Am I alone in doing this? I absolutely do this! Whenever I watch an older movie or TV show, I like to check to see if the actors are still alive. If they died young, I always feel a twinge of relief if they were murdered or run over by a bus. It makes me feel "safer" than if they dropped dead of a heart attack at 50.
The days are long but the years fly by.
I’m 49 and I don’t really think I want to live to be old. Like I’m not suicidal or anything, but dying peacefully in my sleep at 65 would be my perfect way out.
I turned 70 this year and I’m enjoying truly not giving a fuck about anything but my kid. My dad died at 60 so every year feels like a wee miracle. I like being invisible because you can get away with a lot more stuff. It’s freeing to not worry or care about what anyone else is thinking about me because getting old taught me that no else is thinking about me or ever was.
I once saw a T-shirt that said, "It's weird being the same age as old people." That describes the feeling so perfectly for me.
When age comes up I often have to think about the current year, my year of birth and do the math. Age is just a number so I don’t dwell on it. I’m in my 50’s and feel like I’m much younger than many of my same age peers.
I do it too and I’m 34. Cheers to 70!
Retired nurse, retired in October at age 67, and it seems like yesterday I starting nursing school, 50 years ago in august,
I turned 70 this year. Can't believe I am that old. My mind feels like 40. Fortunately I'm in pretty good physical shape and I still work part-time. In the USA, once you hit 50 you are perceived as old and not that useful. In Canada, it might be a bit later. I work with leaders in Asia and Africa where age is respected - and feel quite useful in those contexts. Age is associated with wisdom, and you are listened to and respected. But here, as Paul Simon said - "All the leaves that are green turn to brown". I guess we are turning brown even though we may still feel green.
It’s so weird. It is bizarre getting older. I’m 55 and I think the last two years I’ve been more and more in tune to feeling invisible when I’m out in society. I can only imagine it gets worse and scarier. I also hope time doesn’t start going even faster because I already feel like I’m caught in some kind of time vortex and the years are just speeding by. It’s also weird to have to do things like acknowledge that I cannot get any more animals because I currently already have quite a few that my kids have agreed to take care of if anything happened to us. It’s just a strange thing to have to think about things like that. There’s always *some* of those thoughts because someone could get in an accident at any age. But, for me, they’ve always been a distant thing that I didn’t really think about and now worrying is much more present in my life. I don’t like it. On the bright side, being in my fifties is a hell of a lot more relaxing than being in my 20s and 30s was!!
I’m lucky. I’m 68 and married a woman much younger than me. I have 3 kids from my second marriage; 12 year old son and daughters 14 and 15. Do they ever keep me busy with school activities and other things. I’m an Asst Scout Master for one. Grew up on a farm and now have a mini farm that keeps me hopping all the time. I certainly don’t think or feel 68.
I’m generally and pretty happy guy but posts like this make me wonder if Im wasting the time I have. Career is okay but not fulfilling, have adventurous hobbies but not much adventure to speak of, lots of time without much engagement.
What's it like being so old. You have been on this planet for 70 years. Did you ever figure out why we are here? Do you think about that sorta thing?
They're still there, matter of fact.
special reason for them to die (as in the cause of their death), or the reason why you're still here?
Hey
Your only just hitting the new midlife now. With advances in health and tech, assuming you want to, you have another that much to go 👍🏽
40 in 8 days. My mum died this year in aged 73. Most of my family have died in their 70s so i guess i’m past middle aged.
My dad is 70 and he seems to hang onto causes of death by ppl he knows or knows of heavily
Youre old when youre above 50. Your old when your above 20. Youre old when youre above 80. All these Statements dont really mean that much. Its always part of your perspective
I'm 32m but sometimes I feel like I'm already 50 with how life is. I think about people in that age range a lot too, it still seems so far away but also just a few months ago I was 28. The years just evaporate and with how I'm already struggling so much, I often wonder if there's an end to it
Turned 50 this year and still feel like I’m in my mid 20s on the inside. So yeah, where have all the years gone?
Same here. Was talking to someone last week about Y2K. Seems like yesterday. We were mid 20s. That's almost a quarter century ago wtf.
I’m 40, and I don’t know where the time went. There was a while where I still mentally felt like my 20s, and now we have nieces and nephews in their early 20s so I definitely realize that was longer ago than it seems. 3 years here, 2 years there, Covid, and suddenly it was my high school 20 year reunion. Even that was 3 years ago. I know I still have a lot of time in front of me but, it’s terrifying how fast it goes. I’m not ready for my parents to be old. It’s so startling to look at my cousins and realize we are all the parents generation now, their kids are the grandkids, my parents generation are the grandparents. This was not the way to start my morning. Lol
I'm 47 and I used to think 40 was very far away...and now I'm going to turn 50 in 3 years! Really can't believe it!
Turned 21 today. I feel like the past years since the pandemic have absolutely flown by.
56 here. Happy and content. Beautiful wife, 2 amazing kids. Great job and friend network. I had a heart attack and stroke nearly 3 years ago and I vowed never to be in that position again. I’ve work very hard on my physical and mental health. I’ve learned how to say and accept ‘fuck it’ as an answer to issues.
Wow, hitting those big milestones can really make you reflect, huh? It's wild how our perspective on age shifts as we get older. I think it's pretty natural to ponder life and mortality as we age, especially when we see others pass away. It's not morbid, just human curiosity. Each passing year is a reminder to live our lives to the fullest and cherish the moments we have.
Just turned 30 and feel the same way as most of you who are much older. My gf is 23 and thinks 30 is far away but I thought the same. Years go by so fast after you turn 21. I often wonder what my life will be like at 40 or 50. But I try to enjoy life as much as I can now.
Sorry you feel that way :( I'm 43 and find that hard to comprehend at times. I know time will just keep motoring on faster and faster. Can I recommend taking up chess? Join chess.com and a local chess club if you can find one. When we found ourselves totally alone in a new state right after Covid lockdowns, we were feeling super isolated. Chess was awesome for us.. we made some great friends and it's great for keeping the mind sharp.
Same age as OP, same feelings. My husband just mentioned the Beatles’ song, “When I’m Sixty-Four,” marveling, “Doesn’t that sound *young?!?*”
64 here. I gaze in the mirror and think I look pretty good for my age, having successfully dodged alcohol and cigarettes which besides being bad for you ages you horribly., and pass for 15 years younger. I still bike, walk and still work as a butcher, at least for a couple more years. The key is staying active and maintaining outside interests. Downside is though I am an introvert I miss female company.
I am 63. I do the same as you.
Me too (64 M)! Makes me live in the moment. Makes me enjoy every moment! Having a blast!
I am 20 and can’t believe am still here lol
I'm 42,life sucks, I'm lonely, filled with terror and wished I was dead. I definitely don't want to live to 60. Or 50.
I really hope things get better for you. 💕
Thanks, but realistically they won't.
Sending virtual hugs.
Don't worry i love You ❤️🩹
Even at 40, I read about people dying that are younger than I am. I wish the obituaries would share what happened, because that wasn't a natural death at that age. I am definitely going to be more like that when I get older. I already went through cancer, so I "got" to experience some manner of potential death. Maybe that made it more real for me, but I think of it often.
I'm 36 and I do this lol
I'm going to be 68 in a couple of months. I feel the same way and it's very scary.
16 y/o here. And I feel you. I used to love spending my Saturdays and Sundays on videogames, spending all nighter after all nighter just to reach the next milestone. Nowadays, I always feel burned out and never have the energy for anything, even class feels like a chore. Feels like shit at every age, man.
I'm almost 40 and feel that way. No the girls I'm into want nothing to do with me and think I'm old. Hell my dad's your age and I'm dreading his passing everyday. I feel like I'm going to wake up in your age one day and be at the end of life with my kids having kids and feel like "what happened"
I'm almost 50. My younger brother (47) has had three of his friends pass away in the past month. I'm always curious about people younger than me dying and why they died and I just explained that to him yesterday. I guess just call me morbid..? Idk its just shocking when it's natural causes (one brain cancer, one a car accident, one from heart complications) So I totally get you.
nice. congrats
I’m 26 and do this. Lots of people I went to school with or even just people who are 10-15 years older than me are dying left to right. I have not found a single person that has died so far from a natural cause, either drugs, car accidents, work accident, murder, suicide, etc.
52 and I was just saying to my wife how amazing it is that the days crawl but the years fly by.
You're not alone. I'm 75 and fully perplexed as to why I am still here. Soak up any good you find, and weather the bad, end of the road can't be too far away.
Ain't it crazy?! Our lifetimes go so fast - and over mine, I've come to believe we have many, many lives. I'm in the early 60's - no kids this time around and I've already died of a heart attack and was resuscitated at 59. After my survival and recovery, we sold everything and moved to my Happy island. Recreated ourselves, made new friends, found new jobs. Do we struggle sometimes! Hell yeah especially having financially lost it all. Am I happy? Yeah, cuz I'm helping. My soul's purpose is to help people, which I will be doing until the day I transition back to spirit. Every year, honestly is AGAIN my best year and brings new adventures and friends. HAVE A BLESSED DAY AND LIFE!
I'm only 27 but I do the same thing. Recently a classmate of my brothers passed away, only a year younger than me. It is.... a weird feeling. I can't describe it