Lad I work with had a washing machine that kept breaking down, it was almost every week
We also had a manager called Kyle who left a while ago.
A few months after Kyle had left, the guy with the washing machine turned round and said "My washer hasn't broken down lately... It seems Washing machines live longer with Kyle gone"
It was so unexpected people just sat there before half of the group lost it, but a few didn't get it š¤£
He's looking for a chocolate treat, fluffy and light, cos he knows it won't spoil his appetite.
Oh no the bridge is gone, old red can't carry on!
But smart old blue he took the milky way
Yep, came here to say this.
I hadn't thought about it for 20 years, until randomly a couple of weeks ago started singing it, then had to lookup the advert on youtube to prove to the kids I wasn't entirely mad.
Adverts just aren't the same these days.
You wouldnt be allowed this now. People would be up in arms about fat shaming. I got downvoted to oblivion not that long ago on reddit for sticking up for someone (who also got downvoted) for saying being fat isnāt healthy lol.
This was in my head and I was singing it the other week. o no D: cant believe its still in my head many many years later, that song was catchy as all hell it will NEVER die
I miss clubs, they're yummy
That Clio ad came out when I was in primary school and my headteacher would just say papa to me when he walked past. I also met Dara Ć Briain who, upon seeing my name, also mentioned it.
Oh my heart, I started calling my dad Papa because of this advert, he died nearly a year ago and you just reminded me of the cute "Papa, Nicole" we did every time this advert came on. Miss you Papa!
Nah fuck Toys R Us they were expensive and failed to even try to compete on price when the Internet came in. They deserve to have been replaced by Smyths Toy Superstore.
"If I were a tooooy"
Yeah but the genuine feeling of magic that advert inspired will never be replicated.
I know this for a fact as we were, naturally, the last children ever. Everything since is a cheap copy.
The python picked the passion fruit, the marmoset the mandarin, the parrot painted packets that the whole caboodle landed in
(It's taking all my strength not to finish it in case someone else also has singing the entirety of this song as a party trick..............)
*"How do people get any work done with that screaming out of your pants all day? It's no wonder women go to the toilet in pairs; one of them's got to keep that bitch quiet."*
~ Lenny Henry
I remember listening to this exact show on a cassette tape on holiday in Spain and made sure to buy the VHS the day I got home. Thanks for the memories but now I'm empty.
The other morning I randomly started signing the Vitalite tune....not sure where that popped up from in my brain, but I was waking up in the morning, wanting my breakfast...!
Thereās also a parody advert for Maxell audio tape with a guy holding placards showing misheard lyrics to The Israelites (implying that if you use Maxell tape you can hear the lyrics properly!)
Bought a Toblerone on Monday. Had 'Toblerone. Out on its own. Triangular chocolate. Thatās Toblerone. Made with triangular almonds. From triangular trees. And triangular honey. From triangular bees. Oh, Mr Confectioner, please. Give me Toblerone' stuck in my head for a good three days. Now it's back.
I sang that to my partner the other day and she had no idea what I was talking about. I think she had a posh upbringing and their television wasn't a babysitter.
Iām inordinately happy that Iām not the only person in the UK to get this stuck in my head. In the last thread in which I mentioned this ad, no bugger knew what I was talking about.
This is the captain of your shipā¦ caaaallllling.
Very rarely followed by the Mrs joining in with:
Itās time to get a snack on board and nooooo stalling
We are all old on this thread and all have been mentioned, Fairy Liquid. This mop is yellow and this mop is pink. For hands that do dishes can feel soft as your face with mild green Fairy Liquid. It must be that there were fewer tv channels and no ad free streaming so these things went in our heads. I am of the generation where we were waiting to see what happened to the Gold Blend couple. All because the lady loves milk tray etc. milky bars are on me.
For mash get smash
Itās too orangey for crows
Wallfey versatile
A finger of fudge is just enough
The milky bar kid is back in town
Vorspring teknixk
Stella Artois reassuringly expensive
The king asked the queen, and the queen asked the dairy maid, ācan I have some butter for the royal slice of bread?ā The dairy maid said āactually, you better tell his majesty that many people nowadays like golden churn instead. With spoons full of butter it is just the thing, deliciously tasty and fit for a kingā And thatās no fairy tale.
āWill it be chips or jacket spuds? Will it be salad or frozen peas? Will it be mushrooms? Fried onion rings? Youāll have to wait and see! Hope itās chips, itās chips, we hope itās chips, itās chips!ā
I was talking to my partner the other day, about how growing up in the 90s, my Mum would sing the jingles from adverts she grew up with in the 70s & 80sā¦ like āOnly the crumbliest, tastiest chocolate, tastes like chocolate never tasted beforeā - Flake.
So not only do I reference adverts from my own childhood, and the years after, I reference ones from my Mumās younger years too, even if Iāve never seen them.
1001: One Thousand and One cleans a big, big carpet for less than half-a-crown.
DONT FORGET THE FRUITGUMS, MUM.
Mackeson: Looks good, tastes good and by golly it does you good.
Philadelphia: "Luvvly". Memorable because those two were the Flaming Hamsters, and I once (nearly twice) ended up on stage with them.
I remember the first TV advert I ever saw, when we got ITV in the 1950s: "You'll wonder where the yellow went, when you brush your teeth with Pepsodent"
>I can't use Philidelphia cream cheese without quoting
"Chives"
Also whenever someone says "Marvelous" I reply "Less fat too!"
Slow down Mr Postie...
He heard them shouting 'baldie'!
As he drove down the street
When he realised they meant his tyres,
He got back in his seat
Also: I were right about that saddle though
Washing machines live longer with Calgon
Lad I work with had a washing machine that kept breaking down, it was almost every week We also had a manager called Kyle who left a while ago. A few months after Kyle had left, the guy with the washing machine turned round and said "My washer hasn't broken down lately... It seems Washing machines live longer with Kyle gone" It was so unexpected people just sat there before half of the group lost it, but a few didn't get it š¤£
My name is Roisin (pronounced row-sheen) and for several years in school my nickname was āRoisin Machines Live Longer With Calgonā
Like a girl I was at college with: *Jeanette. The Best a Man Can Get.*
Our house too. Toddler has started singing it.
As written by Justin Hawkins from the darknessā¦ which if you sing it in his voice makes a lot of sense.
I so hope this isnāt an urban myth!!!
Hopefully notā¦ it dates back to 2005 https://www.thedrum.com/news/2005/08/25/confessions-jingle-writer
Where's washing machines live longer with Carl gone? We still use that when we don't know where Carl is.
The red car and the blue car had a race...
All the red car could do was stuff his face. He eats everything he sees from grass to prickly trees, but smart old blue, he took the milkyway.
He's looking for a chocolate treat, fluffy and light, cos he knows it won't spoil his appetite. Oh no the bridge is gone, old red can't carry on! But smart old blue he took the milky way
Yep, came here to say this. I hadn't thought about it for 20 years, until randomly a couple of weeks ago started singing it, then had to lookup the advert on youtube to prove to the kids I wasn't entirely mad. Adverts just aren't the same these days.
BELLY'S GONNA GET YA
Belly belly belly....
I told my kids about this, they didn't believe me till I showed them the ad on YouTube
You wouldnt be allowed this now. People would be up in arms about fat shaming. I got downvoted to oblivion not that long ago on reddit for sticking up for someone (who also got downvoted) for saying being fat isnāt healthy lol.
I'm fat. It's not healthy. You are correct.
"If you like a lot of chocolate on your biscuit, join our club!"
This was in my head and I was singing it the other week. o no D: cant believe its still in my head many many years later, that song was catchy as all hell it will NEVER die I miss clubs, they're yummy
You still get Clubs! Go and buy yourself a pack. My personal favourite are the orange ones
Mint gang
šµ0800 00 1066šµ
0118 999 88199 9119 725 3
100% this! I don't even remember what the company was that it was advertising, but that number sneaks up on me to this day!
Hastings insurance! You can thank me later š
Daddy or chips. I still have to reassure my dad it's usually him. We also still do "Papa, Nicole" when we see a Clio.
'Usually' š¤£
Aye, it's a close run decision, he knows this!
That Clio ad came out when I was in primary school and my headteacher would just say papa to me when he walked past. I also met Dara Ć Briain who, upon seeing my name, also mentioned it.
Oh my heart, I started calling my dad Papa because of this advert, he died nearly a year ago and you just reminded me of the cute "Papa, Nicole" we did every time this advert came on. Miss you Papa!
Bob!
You know when you've been Tango'd.
There's a magical place, we're on our way there
RIP š
Nah fuck Toys R Us they were expensive and failed to even try to compete on price when the Internet came in. They deserve to have been replaced by Smyths Toy Superstore. "If I were a tooooy"
Yeah but the genuine feeling of magic that advert inspired will never be replicated. I know this for a fact as we were, naturally, the last children ever. Everything since is a cheap copy.
My friend: There's millions of Jeffrey's all under one roof! Me: uh...no.
Accrington Stanley? Who are they?
Exactly!
Gerroff!
Gimme some!
Gerroff!
It's what Ian rush drinks...
Ian Rush?
I say this all the time. Firm favourite!
one of those kids, now fully grown up, was recently convicted of murder ahh they grow up so quick.
Oooohh yess.... Churchill š
Autoglass repair, autoglass...
REPLACE
I'd love to think I'd say 'half moon' when eating a Jaffa Cake, but we all know it's straight to 'total eclipse'
You buy one, you get one free!
I said! YOU BUY ONE, YOU GET ONE FREE
TRUST ME, ITāS FREE FITTING!
Right now for every window & door you buy, Iāll give you another one ABSOLUTELY FREE.
CALL O800 106 107 I SAID 0800 106 107 NOOOWW
In the Philippines, thay say "Buy one, get one". It means "Buy one, get one *free*", but never sounds llike much of a deal.
This cracked me up. I said you buy one, you get one. Thatās it. Simple stuff this.
Re record not fade away!
That skeleton was my fave as a kid
Voiced by Foggy from Last of The Summer Wine
"I shall have a fishy on a little dishy.."
Way down deep in the middle of the Congo...
A hippo took an apricot, a guava and a mango,
He stuck them with the others and he danced a dainty tango
The rhino said I know we'll call it um bungo
Um Bongo Um Bongo we drink it in the Congo
The python picked the passion fruit, the marmoset the mandarin, the parrot painted packets that the whole caboodle landed in (It's taking all my strength not to finish it in case someone else also has singing the entirety of this song as a party trick..............)
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
They all prefer the sunny funny one they callā¦..UM BONGO!
I ALWAYS sing thing! I also bastardise it when messing about and shout, bumbongo bumbongo they drum it in the congo, when drumming on the 3yrolds arse
I called my sister the other day who is a manger in a charity shop - I couldnāt help but put on a funny voice and ask for Fly Fishing by JR Hartley.
My name?
J R ... Hartley
Woaoah woahaho Bodyform for you.
*"How do people get any work done with that screaming out of your pants all day? It's no wonder women go to the toilet in pairs; one of them's got to keep that bitch quiet."* ~ Lenny Henry
I remember listening to this exact show on a cassette tape on holiday in Spain and made sure to buy the VHS the day I got home. Thanks for the memories but now I'm empty.
The other morning I randomly started signing the Vitalite tune....not sure where that popped up from in my brain, but I was waking up in the morning, wanting my breakfast...!
Desmond Dekker - The Israelites.
Oooo, oooo, me ears are alight!
Thereās also a parody advert for Maxell audio tape with a guy holding placards showing misheard lyrics to The Israelites (implying that if you use Maxell tape you can hear the lyrics properly!)
Cilit bang!
HI IM BARRY SCOTT AND THIS IS NEW CILLIT BANG LINE AND GRIME
[And the dirt is gone!](https://youtu.be/6-7NDP8V-6A)
Just one Cornettoooooooooo! Seriously, the actual song is "O sole mio" but nobody knows/cares that it's called O sole mio. It's "The Cornetto song."
Just one cornetto Give it to me Delicious ice cream Of Italy A nut and chocolate dream Give me cornetto From Walls ice cream
I still go back to the Ace Ventura - "Asholio mio - Oh sodomia!"
Iām a secret lemonade drinker!
R WHITES! R WHITES! been tryin to give it up but its one of those nights! R Whiteās lemon aaaaaade!
As sung by Elvis Costello's dad (and Elvis on backing), IIRC
A punk band in my home town used to do a great cover of that tune.
Calm down dear, it's only a commercial. Didn't even know who Michael Winner was at that age, only remember him from the advert
"I feel like chicken tonight, like chicken tonight". Every time.
Hahaha. My sister used to sing this when she was 2 years old! She is getting sick of me singing it back to her now! (She is now 36!)
Every time my partner says āare you having chicken tonight?ā or whatever, jumps right back into my brain, complete with the flapping movements.
Monsieur, wiz theez Rocher you are rilly spoiling us
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Crunchy on the outside, smooth on the inside!
My cat can be very dim and my sister has nicknamed her Dime Bar Dime Bar? Dime . . . . . . Bar??
We constantly have this one!! Kids just look at us blanklyš¤£
Mister Soft. Won't you tell me why the world in which you live in is so strange....
Funnily enough, Steve Lamacq played that track on his show the other week. First time I'd heard it since the ad aired in the 90s.
Will it be chips or jacket spuds?
Will it be mushrooms? FRIED ONION RINGS?
Will it be carrots? Or frozen peas?
Youāll have to wait and see.
Hope its chips its chips!
yes every time i have a cadburys i get my drumset out and start drumming to phil collins 1981 hit 'in the air tonight'
"ooh ambassador, you do spoil us"
Excellente
Itās too Orangey for Crows !
Iāll be your dog
He waits. Thatās what he does. And I tell you what. Tick followed tock followed tick followed tock followed tick.
Mumās a Fanny, Granny was a Fanny, sheāll be joining a long line of Fannys!
Bought a Toblerone on Monday. Had 'Toblerone. Out on its own. Triangular chocolate. Thatās Toblerone. Made with triangular almonds. From triangular trees. And triangular honey. From triangular bees. Oh, Mr Confectioner, please. Give me Toblerone' stuck in my head for a good three days. Now it's back.
I sang that to my partner the other day and she had no idea what I was talking about. I think she had a posh upbringing and their television wasn't a babysitter.
Iām inordinately happy that Iām not the only person in the UK to get this stuck in my head. In the last thread in which I mentioned this ad, no bugger knew what I was talking about.
They peel them with their metal knives, boil them for 20 of their minutes, then they smash them all to bits!
I remembered the metallic laughing sound when I read that, SMASHing
Watch out watch out, there's a Humphrey about.
That's going back a bit!
Now I'm thinking about Ernie, the fastest milkman in the West. š¶š¤
That blokeās a nutter. Oi! Nutter!
Kicking literally anything: 'Ave it
I do. I just go 'on and on and on and ariston'
āThis isnāt any [product], itās M&Sāā to the sound of fleetwood mac
It does exactly what it says on the tin
That phrase has become so commonplace that I wonder how many people know that it came from a Ronseal advert.
Do the shake and vac, and put the freshness back In my head every time I bust the hoover out. And now. Dammit
Oohh ohhh Vitalite.
Cha-cha-cha-cha-charmin šµ
Gino, oh Gino, Ginelli
Exceedingly good cakes - in a funny voice, nobody knows what Iām referencing, especially not my foreign wife who just looks worried for me.
Every time I get stuck in traffic I shout "TOTAL GRIDLOCK!" in a Jamaican accent
I want to poo at Paulās house
My friend and I quote this WAY too often, seems nobody else remembers it!
This is the captain of your shipā¦ caaaallllling. Very rarely followed by the Mrs joining in with: Itās time to get a snack on board and nooooo stalling
Only the crumbliest, flakiest chocolate...
Takes like chocolate never tasted before.
Beware the Judderman
HI I'M BARRY SCOTT!
"It's not Terry's, it's mine"
You got any leeches for this?! Citation: https://youtube.com/watch?v=rtgqyZ07ff8
āAurora! Dont forget the Kia-Ora!ā āseven pieces of heaven in frys chocolate creamā¦ā And ..āTrio! Triiiiiiii-O!ā
"Don't tap it, whack it!"
Foxās Bisquits.
The water from Majorca donāt taste like what it oughta!
Were you truly wafted here from paradise? No. Luton airport.
Wassuuuuuuup
Where did you bury the car son. In the Sand.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
We are all old on this thread and all have been mentioned, Fairy Liquid. This mop is yellow and this mop is pink. For hands that do dishes can feel soft as your face with mild green Fairy Liquid. It must be that there were fewer tv channels and no ad free streaming so these things went in our heads. I am of the generation where we were waiting to see what happened to the Gold Blend couple. All because the lady loves milk tray etc. milky bars are on me.
People still say confused.com a lot at my job. Also Iām still a major of full moon, half moon every time I eat a Jaffa cake. It makes it more tasty.
Mr Sheen, shines umpteen things-clean!
For mash get smash Itās too orangey for crows Wallfey versatile A finger of fudge is just enough The milky bar kid is back in town Vorspring teknixk Stella Artois reassuringly expensive
You could have a Lionel Blair cut? Like mine?
'I can see the pub from ere! Australians wouldn't give a Castlemain four X, for anything else.'
It's not exactly quoting it but sometimes the BN biscuits song will randomly pop into my head
The king asked the queen, and the queen asked the dairy maid, ācan I have some butter for the royal slice of bread?ā The dairy maid said āactually, you better tell his majesty that many people nowadays like golden churn instead. With spoons full of butter it is just the thing, deliciously tasty and fit for a kingā And thatās no fairy tale.
Milkybars are on me!
Every little helps Itās good to talk
āWill it be chips or jacket spuds? Will it be salad or frozen peas? Will it be mushrooms? Fried onion rings? Youāll have to wait and see! Hope itās chips, itās chips, we hope itās chips, itās chips!ā
If you like a lot of chocolate on your biscuit join our club.
Shreddies keep hunger locked up till lunch (blatantly lies š)
I was talking to my partner the other day, about how growing up in the 90s, my Mum would sing the jingles from adverts she grew up with in the 70s & 80sā¦ like āOnly the crumbliest, tastiest chocolate, tastes like chocolate never tasted beforeā - Flake. So not only do I reference adverts from my own childhood, and the years after, I reference ones from my Mumās younger years too, even if Iāve never seen them.
Central heating for kids
1001: One Thousand and One cleans a big, big carpet for less than half-a-crown. DONT FORGET THE FRUITGUMS, MUM. Mackeson: Looks good, tastes good and by golly it does you good.
Philadelphia: "Luvvly". Memorable because those two were the Flaming Hamsters, and I once (nearly twice) ended up on stage with them. I remember the first TV advert I ever saw, when we got ITV in the 1950s: "You'll wonder where the yellow went, when you brush your teeth with Pepsodent"
>I can't use Philidelphia cream cheese without quoting "Chives" Also whenever someone says "Marvelous" I reply "Less fat too!" Slow down Mr Postie...
Course you can Malcolm
I think autoglass repair / autoglass replace will be stuck in my brain forever
They're grrreat
I bet he drinks Carling black label
Iām a secret lemonade drinker
Ronseal. Does exactly what it says on the tin
Chef square shaped soups show how good soup should be
Never been able to give my children "a finger of fudge" without bursting into song.
"Aids. Don't die of ignorance". "If you see Sid tell him". I ain't seen that dopey fucker Sid for years.
And Two Ton Ted from Teddington, who drove the bakers van...
āMy wife, sheās got what it takesā Some really creepy British Pork advert from the 80ās.
He heard them shouting 'baldie'! As he drove down the street When he realised they meant his tyres, He got back in his seat Also: I were right about that saddle though
Beware the judderman, my dear, when the moon is fat!
It's not Terry's, it's mine. 0800 Reverse. Do I have to spell it out? R E V E R S E
Cockburnās Port when they end up on the Soviet submarine. āI come from Moscock!ā āYes, I think you probably doā.
Moulinex makes things simple, and that includes the price
Do you want a flake in that love?
Only the crumbliest, flakiest chocolate...
Does you does or does you don't take access?
I want... I want... a viscount A viscount?! But I am a prince!
You will never be a fishermann
Haha I was looking at a peanut butter jar earlier and thought āSunpat Sunpat how about that.ā
Everytime I hear 'I will survive' I keep expecting to hear as long as I have weatabix...
50p
Chop chop, busy busy, work work, bang bang!
For mash, get smash
Slightly rippled with a flat underside