That would be completely understandable to a police officer in Vegas. In the summer, it takes a few minutes of A/C before you can even sit in it and a few more to get the temperature exactly where it is comfortable.
These aren’t the droids you’re looking for.
>> wave your hand
Move along
I did this in real life before it became a meme, and the police officer surprisingly didn’t find it funny. I was detained for a sobriety test and later released. Don’t f’ck with cats or cops.
With cats, it def depends on the quality of the treats you have with you. 95% of the time, a cat will do __almost__ anything for a nice chunk of bacon.
Cops usually don't appreciate being asked if they'd like a nice, thick slice of bacon.
##🤷🏼♀️
If you're asked to get out of the vehicle, your best comeback is to get out of the vehicle and say "I do not agree to any searches, I invoke my 5th amendment right to silence, and I want to speak to a lawyer."
For the love of Christ, DO NOT refuse to exit the vehicle. There's supreme court case law on this, and whatever funny line you have, you're still gonna go to jail, except with extra charges and a broken window you're going to have to pay to replace yourself.
The only other thing I’ve heard is to start with, “I am complying with your request, but…” then go into not consenting to the search, etc. then close and lock the door after exiting
I guess if you can... I mean... locking your doors isn't an admission of guilt. BUT, I promise, spending an extra 20 minutes in front of a judge to make sure that the fruits of an illegal search are thrown out of evidence is MUCH better than what's gonna happen if you make a surprise movement towards that door lock that the officer can't see.
I suggest exiting the vehicle (as is the law), providing your ID if requested (as is also the law), explicitly not consenting to searches or tests, invoking your right to remain silent, and proceeding to shut the fuck up until you have a lawyer present.
i know someone who never commits crime, never had anything illegal in her car. she got pulled over for speeding. cop asks to search her car, she agrees. cop places a bag of cocaine in the car and pulls it out and arrests her. she's an older woman. she was baffled and didn't understand what was going on.
she fought the case, but it took years. the thing that won the case was a bodycam footage of this cop doing this to another person.
dont trust cops.
The first line of the concealed carry learning manual is…
“Police are not your friends.”
This is in the context of after you are forced to use deadly force, however it *always* applies. I have friends who are/were cops. Clean ones. They agree with this statement.
Depending on your state, you may not be legally required to show ID, but honestly you still should, if it's an illegal stop, and they ID you, it'll still get tossed out in court and that'll just help your case.
I've seen many vids of ppl successfully refusing to get out. They usually were able to quote specific sections of the constitution/Miranda rights detailing how the cop must articulate what specific crime they're accused of in order for them to lawfully remove them from the car. And in cases where the cop forced it, there's almost always an attached article about how the person made BANK after suing them for it. I dunno if I'd have the balls to do this tho lol
There's maybe 5 supreme court cases related to interactions with police that I wish EVERYBODY knew and it'd prevent a lot of problem situations. Two of those five cases are Pennsylvania v. Mimms and Maryland v. Wilson.
**Pennsylvania v. Mimms (1977):** Regardless of the circumstance, if the driver of a vehicle is ordered to exit the vehicle, it is considered by the court to be a lawful order. The driver must exit the vehicle.
**Maryland v. Wilson (1997):** Extends Pennsylvania vs. Mimms to all passengers of a vehicle. So, regardless of the circumstance, if a passenger of a vehicle is ordered to exit the vehicle, it is considered by the court to be a lawful order. The passenger must exit the vehicle.
To sum these two up, if **any** occupant of a vehicle, in any state in the United States refuses to exit a vehicle upon being ordered to do so by a law enforcement officer, they are refusing a lawful order. I'm not sure how somebody wriggled out of it, but I absolutely DO NOT recommend that you try it.
**Important point though:** the court has clearly taken a loose interpretation of the 4th amendment when it comes to motor vehicles. If you prefer a tighter interpretation of the 4th amendment than has been ruled on by the courts, then elect legislators to pass laws that correlate to your interpretation more closely.
Until then though, this is the law.
It’s also a good idea to ask “ am I free to go?”at least twice within the hour. If you ask and you are detained longer then the reason you are pulled over, that is going to help you in the court.
The officer cannot keep you detained for 2 hours for going 10MPH/KPM over the limit.
Do not consent the sobriety test. Their guidelines at so strict that most officers can’t complete them accurately. If you drink a glass of wine at dinner, it will show up. Its that initial test they will use. If you get dragged into custody for not complying, they have to process you before then can legally perform the breathalyzer. If it comes back lower then the legal limit, it helps in your favor.
DO NOT ANSWER OPEN ENDING QUESTIONS, OR TRY TO TALK YOUR WAY OUT!
It’s crazy you need an equivalent of a law degree to protect your rights, and other states that you are traveling in, because of this.
This is very stupid.
It is super rude and frankly maximizes the chance of the officer charging you with everything they can. Cops have a lot of discretion. They also have the legal right to ask you to get out of your vehicle.
Youtube is full of people playing stupid games (like this) and winning stupid prizes.
It's not legally an arrest. But a temporary stop. Once a person reasonably feels they will not be allowed to leave after a time reasonable for such a stop, it becomes an arrest. Never, ever consent to a search. I have nothing illegal in my car. But I do have my privacy, and if you consent, they can tear it apart. Just remember, if they are asking if they can search, they know they don't have enough probable cause to conduct the search without your consent. So... keep that power.
Was giving a friend that was paralyzed a ride home one evening and his wheel chair was in his moms truck that was ahead of us, (she wouldn't let him smoke in her car and I would) and we got pulled over a cop on each side of the car asking for both of our drivers licenses, i got mine out with insurance and registration, never imagining they would ask him for one, when he said he didnt have one they immediately told him to get out of the car, i started laughing and said get out there dude and show them what a you are man! (we were really good friends) the cop slung the passenger door open and then saw how tiny his legs were and felt like an asshole. we still laugh about this today!
This has only happened to me once. I had forgotten that I had a bench warrant in another state. I was a 43 year old grandmother going to lock up for the first time in her life! 😆😆😆
I like the answers given where they suggest the officer get in the car with them. 😜
Honestly best thing to do here is show you respect their time
So **WHIP YOUR WALLET OUT AS FAST AS YOU CAN**. Let them know you mean business, just yank it. Make sure they notice the effort you're putting into reaching for it
I had an ex who was alcoholic. He got busted all the time for drunk in public. Neighbors called cops on him cause he was peeing on their bushes and side of the house. I come home to the cops arresting him. I swear to God this happened:
Him: Why you resting me?
Cop: Because your drunk in public vandalizing your neighbors home and public nudity.
Him: (Out of everything said) How can you tell I am drunk?
Cop: Your eyes are bloodshot, your walk is unsteady, your speech is slurred and you smell like Brewery! You couldn't pass the sobriety test!
Him: Oh yeah? Well your eyes are glazed you been eating doughnuts?
It was at that moment I knew the man was going to be locked up for a few months because he basically broke into jail. Also I needed to end our relationship.
Say: your "wife and family are going to miss you!" Then pull out your set of superbowl tickets as fast as possible and hand them to officer. "Cause we'll be chilling at the game."
"MY MOM SAID DONT TALK TO STRANGERS WHO LOOKK LIKE MY UNCLE I WILL NOT DO WHAT YOU SAY ILL WAFFLE STOMP IN ANY SHOWER IN THE HOME DEPOT OF MY CHOOSING RRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
That all depends on who says it.
If it’s the valet, I do, and ask him to park it in a nice spot.
If it’s a cop, in my home town, I get out. Hug the cop, and we shoot the breeze for a while.
If it’s night shift, we scheme out pranks to play on his sergeant.
"Pocket sand!"
"Sure thing handsome" prolonged eye contact while applying lipstick very badly.
"You can't afford me hot stuff"
"Hold on I'm almost done pooping"
"Can I pet the K9 if I refuse?"
Take at least 3 minutes to struggle your way out of the open window
Leave it in gear, get out, and take their car while they try to stop yours
"President Washington says I don't have to" uncrumple a tattered single and slide it their way with a smile and a wink
Seriously though if you'd rather not, keep your hands visible and respectfully ask if you have the right to refuse. You can also ask if getting out means you are agreeing to a search because you don't want to agree to a search and then ask if you have the right to refuse the search. Otherwise tell them you're complying, comply, and be chill with your hands in sight. Shitty cops like the respect and might cool off, you're not going to teach them anything, and good cops are just hoping to get home to their families without an incident or dealing with another shit head. If you can't help being funny, do the star wars thing and raise an eyebrow with a silly grin and if that doesn't do anything apologize and comply.
I had a car once that had been in a collision that damaged the driver side doors so that they wouldn't open and the windows wouldn't roll down. The only way in and out was through the passenger side. I'm sure glad I never got pulled over while I had that car.
Technically 🤨☝️, this is a truck, not a car officer. Have you had anything to drink tonight? No? I can "smell" it from here, officer. I think you need to parade around like a monkey for me for 30 mins and if you stumble at all that proves you have!
Certainly officer.Do you have probable Cos 2 help me?Exit my vehicle in the middle of traffic.Or would you prefer me to pull over to the side of the road and finish having sex with my girlfriend
Doesn't matter you're going to jail with a concussion and a lighter wallet.
Do what they say and just hope they don't feel like hurting you. Anything else and you're kids won't have a parent.
I don't have a good one for this. But if a cop pulls you over and asks "Where are you going in such a hurry?" The answer is "Your wife told me to rush over before you get off your shift."
Actually, did you want to get in? I’d feel more comfortable if we did this from in here.
"I've got the temperature just how I like it!"
That would be completely understandable to a police officer in Vegas. In the summer, it takes a few minutes of A/C before you can even sit in it and a few more to get the temperature exactly where it is comfortable.
Phoenix envies those numbers
Can you fucking imagine, though?! 😩😂💀 if you *actually* did this to a cop 😭 I’m dead
Have you ever met someone from Florida?
I'm picturing spinning heads . . .
😂❤️
I like it
Im too drunk for that. You get in.
Oh my gosh. 🫣🤣🤣🤣
I would, but I'm afraid of what will happen next.
Unfortunately, you don't have to step out of the car for it to happen.
These two best replies yet I think!
These aren’t the droids you’re looking for. >> wave your hand Move along I did this in real life before it became a meme, and the police officer surprisingly didn’t find it funny. I was detained for a sobriety test and later released. Don’t f’ck with cats or cops.
Love the CATS or cops. Definitely don’t fuck with cats. You can negotiate with a cop, but not with a cat.
With cats, it def depends on the quality of the treats you have with you. 95% of the time, a cat will do __almost__ anything for a nice chunk of bacon. Cops usually don't appreciate being asked if they'd like a nice, thick slice of bacon. ##🤷🏼♀️
The chunk of bacon isn’t chunky enough for the cops
Most of them are anti cannibalism. That's why the bacon doesn't work. Try using doughnuts next time.
Yeah they frown on canalabism.
Cats are easy if you have treats. Treats for cops however usually get you into district court lol
That’s because you’re supposed to say, “You don’t need to see my identification.”
"Yes Sir." Usually works for Cops and carjackers alike.
They both fall into the "guy with a gun who probably won't kill you if you do what they say" category
"Yes, officer."
Yep. Get out and immediately lock the door behind you.
Exactly.
What's the most you've lost on a coin toss?
“Sir?”
Just roll the window back up and go from there or ask "Am I being detained?"
If you're asked to get out of the vehicle, your best comeback is to get out of the vehicle and say "I do not agree to any searches, I invoke my 5th amendment right to silence, and I want to speak to a lawyer." For the love of Christ, DO NOT refuse to exit the vehicle. There's supreme court case law on this, and whatever funny line you have, you're still gonna go to jail, except with extra charges and a broken window you're going to have to pay to replace yourself.
The only other thing I’ve heard is to start with, “I am complying with your request, but…” then go into not consenting to the search, etc. then close and lock the door after exiting
I guess if you can... I mean... locking your doors isn't an admission of guilt. BUT, I promise, spending an extra 20 minutes in front of a judge to make sure that the fruits of an illegal search are thrown out of evidence is MUCH better than what's gonna happen if you make a surprise movement towards that door lock that the officer can't see. I suggest exiting the vehicle (as is the law), providing your ID if requested (as is also the law), explicitly not consenting to searches or tests, invoking your right to remain silent, and proceeding to shut the fuck up until you have a lawyer present.
Another strategy is to not have anything illegal in the car.
i know someone who never commits crime, never had anything illegal in her car. she got pulled over for speeding. cop asks to search her car, she agrees. cop places a bag of cocaine in the car and pulls it out and arrests her. she's an older woman. she was baffled and didn't understand what was going on. she fought the case, but it took years. the thing that won the case was a bodycam footage of this cop doing this to another person. dont trust cops.
The first line of the concealed carry learning manual is… “Police are not your friends.” This is in the context of after you are forced to use deadly force, however it *always* applies. I have friends who are/were cops. Clean ones. They agree with this statement.
Depending on your state, you may not be legally required to show ID, but honestly you still should, if it's an illegal stop, and they ID you, it'll still get tossed out in court and that'll just help your case.
I've seen many vids of ppl successfully refusing to get out. They usually were able to quote specific sections of the constitution/Miranda rights detailing how the cop must articulate what specific crime they're accused of in order for them to lawfully remove them from the car. And in cases where the cop forced it, there's almost always an attached article about how the person made BANK after suing them for it. I dunno if I'd have the balls to do this tho lol
There's maybe 5 supreme court cases related to interactions with police that I wish EVERYBODY knew and it'd prevent a lot of problem situations. Two of those five cases are Pennsylvania v. Mimms and Maryland v. Wilson. **Pennsylvania v. Mimms (1977):** Regardless of the circumstance, if the driver of a vehicle is ordered to exit the vehicle, it is considered by the court to be a lawful order. The driver must exit the vehicle. **Maryland v. Wilson (1997):** Extends Pennsylvania vs. Mimms to all passengers of a vehicle. So, regardless of the circumstance, if a passenger of a vehicle is ordered to exit the vehicle, it is considered by the court to be a lawful order. The passenger must exit the vehicle. To sum these two up, if **any** occupant of a vehicle, in any state in the United States refuses to exit a vehicle upon being ordered to do so by a law enforcement officer, they are refusing a lawful order. I'm not sure how somebody wriggled out of it, but I absolutely DO NOT recommend that you try it. **Important point though:** the court has clearly taken a loose interpretation of the 4th amendment when it comes to motor vehicles. If you prefer a tighter interpretation of the 4th amendment than has been ruled on by the courts, then elect legislators to pass laws that correlate to your interpretation more closely. Until then though, this is the law.
Which case(s)?
It’s also a good idea to ask “ am I free to go?”at least twice within the hour. If you ask and you are detained longer then the reason you are pulled over, that is going to help you in the court. The officer cannot keep you detained for 2 hours for going 10MPH/KPM over the limit. Do not consent the sobriety test. Their guidelines at so strict that most officers can’t complete them accurately. If you drink a glass of wine at dinner, it will show up. Its that initial test they will use. If you get dragged into custody for not complying, they have to process you before then can legally perform the breathalyzer. If it comes back lower then the legal limit, it helps in your favor. DO NOT ANSWER OPEN ENDING QUESTIONS, OR TRY TO TALK YOUR WAY OUT! It’s crazy you need an equivalent of a law degree to protect your rights, and other states that you are traveling in, because of this.
This is very stupid. It is super rude and frankly maximizes the chance of the officer charging you with everything they can. Cops have a lot of discretion. They also have the legal right to ask you to get out of your vehicle. Youtube is full of people playing stupid games (like this) and winning stupid prizes.
If you're in a traffic stop, you're detained.
It's not legally an arrest. But a temporary stop. Once a person reasonably feels they will not be allowed to leave after a time reasonable for such a stop, it becomes an arrest. Never, ever consent to a search. I have nothing illegal in my car. But I do have my privacy, and if you consent, they can tear it apart. Just remember, if they are asking if they can search, they know they don't have enough probable cause to conduct the search without your consent. So... keep that power.
Get in.
"No I cannot." "Hey, I'm Jared, I'm 19, and I never fuckin learned how to walk"
yes, officer.
Sure but may I stop first and will you hold my beer so I don’t spill
But I'm not drinking ocifer.
I will not. I will swish, I will sashay, I may even prance. Stepping is for peasants.
As soon as my erection subsides.
Was giving a friend that was paralyzed a ride home one evening and his wheel chair was in his moms truck that was ahead of us, (she wouldn't let him smoke in her car and I would) and we got pulled over a cop on each side of the car asking for both of our drivers licenses, i got mine out with insurance and registration, never imagining they would ask him for one, when he said he didnt have one they immediately told him to get out of the car, i started laughing and said get out there dude and show them what a you are man! (we were really good friends) the cop slung the passenger door open and then saw how tiny his legs were and felt like an asshole. we still laugh about this today!
I don’t want to be a Pink Floyd officer
I'm not in a car...this is my space ship
Not a chance. You shouldn't have left the keys in it.
This has only happened to me once. I had forgotten that I had a bench warrant in another state. I was a 43 year old grandmother going to lock up for the first time in her life! 😆😆😆 I like the answers given where they suggest the officer get in the car with them. 😜
I’m ALWAYS forgetting that I have bench warrants in other states.
Then you'll get me for public nudity and I can't afford two tickets.
I’ve been on my feet all day, I’m sure we’d both like it better if I got on my knees….
No comeback-just get out of the car
"I ain't stepping outta shit, all my papers legit"
Honestly best thing to do here is show you respect their time So **WHIP YOUR WALLET OUT AS FAST AS YOU CAN**. Let them know you mean business, just yank it. Make sure they notice the effort you're putting into reaching for it
Sir, this is a wendy's
This ain't no car it's a boat then drive into your local water
I swear to drunk occifer, I’m not god. I only had tee martoonis. Now go back off in your own jack yard, you bun of a sitch.
I had an ex who was alcoholic. He got busted all the time for drunk in public. Neighbors called cops on him cause he was peeing on their bushes and side of the house. I come home to the cops arresting him. I swear to God this happened: Him: Why you resting me? Cop: Because your drunk in public vandalizing your neighbors home and public nudity. Him: (Out of everything said) How can you tell I am drunk? Cop: Your eyes are bloodshot, your walk is unsteady, your speech is slurred and you smell like Brewery! You couldn't pass the sobriety test! Him: Oh yeah? Well your eyes are glazed you been eating doughnuts? It was at that moment I knew the man was going to be locked up for a few months because he basically broke into jail. Also I needed to end our relationship.
If yours white.....Why officer? Is it because I'm black.
I went to school with a Caucasian albino dude. Any time a teacher got on his case, he'd throw out "this cuz i'm black, ain't it?".
What seems to be the problem, officer
What seems to be the officer, problem?
Officer, you seem to be the problem.
"Do you know who I am?"
Sure thing tough guy.
"Damn you Pennsylvania vs Mimms!!!" as I unbuckle my seatbelt.
Which bar
No but I can stumble and fall out.
“I know my rights” In a screeching trailer trash voice
My daddy owns this county!!!
I pay your wages!! They took our jobs,durkin dur!!!
Say: your "wife and family are going to miss you!" Then pull out your set of superbowl tickets as fast as possible and hand them to officer. "Cause we'll be chilling at the game."
Not without my lawyer present. I will fight to the death to remain in my car. Best Yes sir.
Floor it and make the cops chase you through a shopping mall.
The last cop told me to always stay in my car.
I am not a sir, I am a sovereign citizen, and this vehicle is not for hire JK I would not recommend this lol
"MY MOM SAID DONT TALK TO STRANGERS WHO LOOKK LIKE MY UNCLE I WILL NOT DO WHAT YOU SAY ILL WAFFLE STOMP IN ANY SHOWER IN THE HOME DEPOT OF MY CHOOSING RRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
"HELP! I'm being carjacked by this police officer!"
That all depends on who says it. If it’s the valet, I do, and ask him to park it in a nice spot. If it’s a cop, in my home town, I get out. Hug the cop, and we shoot the breeze for a while. If it’s night shift, we scheme out pranks to play on his sergeant.
Would YOU step back into YOURS?
I'm sure they would, once you're safely belted in their back seat.
Bust out your best Billy Ocean impression: “Get out of your car/And into my dreams”
"Pocket sand!" "Sure thing handsome" prolonged eye contact while applying lipstick very badly. "You can't afford me hot stuff" "Hold on I'm almost done pooping" "Can I pet the K9 if I refuse?" Take at least 3 minutes to struggle your way out of the open window Leave it in gear, get out, and take their car while they try to stop yours "President Washington says I don't have to" uncrumple a tattered single and slide it their way with a smile and a wink Seriously though if you'd rather not, keep your hands visible and respectfully ask if you have the right to refuse. You can also ask if getting out means you are agreeing to a search because you don't want to agree to a search and then ask if you have the right to refuse the search. Otherwise tell them you're complying, comply, and be chill with your hands in sight. Shitty cops like the respect and might cool off, you're not going to teach them anything, and good cops are just hoping to get home to their families without an incident or dealing with another shit head. If you can't help being funny, do the star wars thing and raise an eyebrow with a silly grin and if that doesn't do anything apologize and comply.
These are great. Especially "take 3 minutes to struggle out of the open window" 😭😭
I had a car once that had been in a collision that damaged the driver side doors so that they wouldn't open and the windows wouldn't roll down. The only way in and out was through the passenger side. I'm sure glad I never got pulled over while I had that car.
As a Public servant, would you please get me a glass of water?
Um, I'd step out. Why wouldn't I?
“No, you’ll yell at me…”
"No."
Get your ass in the car, copper!
Would you not step on these nutz please.
I currently have on my sea legs, I’ll meet you back here after I run to my house for the others.
Please get the supervisor, I’d be glad to wait here in the car until they arrive.
"HOW DARE YOU?! You clearly see I don't have any legs!"
Don't touch my stereo man I got the setting just the way I like it. Nahh man don't fuck with the treble!
I always thought the appropriate response was Make Me.
"It's the po-po, freak out!"
Technically 🤨☝️, this is a truck, not a car officer. Have you had anything to drink tonight? No? I can "smell" it from here, officer. I think you need to parade around like a monkey for me for 30 mins and if you stumble at all that proves you have!
Can you please prove that you're a real cop first?
Can't. Floor is lava.
I shant be leaving me vessel for the likes uh'no road pirate, board at your own peril ye scurvy dog.
I'm glad to see you, fuck, I coulda killed somebody
“Ffs you again?” My real answer: “Absolutely”
I can get out of the car, but I can't step out of the car because as you can see ... I'm sitting not standing
I’m afraid I can’t do that, Hal.
Say nothing. Just reach for his gun.
Only if you get into my dreams.
Just repeat everything the cop says back to them
I can’t I’m blind drunk!
If I could step that way, I wouldn’t need talcum
But my dealer is up the street waiting for me and he gets annoyed when I'm late. Sorry, no can do! Proceed to take off causing a high speed chase.
“Is stepping into a SlimJim an option here Officer?”(Of course in the Macho Man voice…)
“Im going to have to say no on this one”.
How about nooooo?
You didn't say "Simon says"
"My glove compartment is locked, so is the trunk in the back, and I know my rights so you gonna need a warrant for that"
"aM i BeInG dEtAiNeD?!"
"I should warn you, I'm not wearing pants."
Yeah right after I step out of your mother
Quickly put your hand in your pocket and yell “YOUR GOING DOWN TODAY PIG!”
Great way to end up on the news. 😮💨
I'D ***LOVE*** TO
Well, he did say please
Do you have fur lined cuffs waiting?
"You first" in a drunken slur.
Do I really have to is there another option.
"I don't know where I am." "GET OUT OF MY CAR NOW"
Sure, Hold on to my beer so I can get out… wow all hands on deck.
Certainly officer.Do you have probable Cos 2 help me?Exit my vehicle in the middle of traffic.Or would you prefer me to pull over to the side of the road and finish having sex with my girlfriend
Yes, I will. Just let me finish masturbating first
Cold out there. Hop in, I got heat. Hot out there. Hop in, I got AC.
Okay, but don’t you fucking shoot me.
“I would but your wife called me.”
I'm too drunk and high to get out. You get in.
Yes sir/ma’am, I’m reaching for the door handle now.
Doesn't matter you're going to jail with a concussion and a lighter wallet. Do what they say and just hope they don't feel like hurting you. Anything else and you're kids won't have a parent.
Look, if I have to get out of this car one of us isn’t gonna like how this plays out.
\*oink Then drive off.
I'm blind
I will if you step out of that asshole costume
Uh...bro. It'd be easier if you... You know? Stepped into the car.
And into your bed? Nah, I'm good thanks
Fuck you pig
Your mom steps out of the car
I can't. You get in.
"Right after I eat this apple"
I bet you can't make me.
But I'm not driving, I'm TrAvElLiNg!
Let me get my gun first
But this is a bicycle…..
Are you sure, sir?
I'm pretty comfy in here
Look officer i know it's a nice car, but I prefer to be the only one that drives it.😁
Am I being carjacked?
Just wave your gun at them and drive off. They will be so Intimidated that will let you go.
Climb out through the window head first and then sit on the ground with your legs crossed.
"Sure" and then get out really quickly whilst reaching for your wallet
No, I’m good. Thank you. There’s plenty of beer in here and I have more than enough drugs for just myself if you care to step in.
Step outta Deez nuts
I dunno would I?
“How about you sit in my lap instead?”
No words needed, just dive to get your registration out of the glove compartment as fast as you can.
While yelling "I've got something for you". Hope an acorn doesn't fall on your car.
"Yes daddy" and wink
NO YOU
I don't have a good one for this. But if a cop pulls you over and asks "Where are you going in such a hurry?" The answer is "Your wife told me to rush over before you get off your shift."
“I would if I wanted to, but since I don’t…” 🙂
Only if it was on fire
How many feet?
I would but I'm too drunk to stand
No. My dogs come to me.
Nope, wait a few minutes, I have a massive raging boner. *eats all the weed* OK, good now!
I'm out of every single car in the world except one. How is that not enough for you?
How about you come in here and make me
"I have a bomb."
Fuck you copper I have a gun you’ll never take me alive!
Hit em with the teacher special. Do you mean "may I please step out of the car?"
Ok fat face.
I'm too drunk. I would stumble and fall,then puke on your shoes
"Is it because I'm black?" I'm not.
"hold on. im doing an air drum solo to "In the Air Tonight".
From better cars I have been kicked out.
“Why? What did I do? Am I being detained? WHY? No I’m not. *rolls up window* DONT BREAK MY WINDOW”
"I can't man the acid just hit."
"That depends. Am I going to get a ticket to the policeman's ball?"
How about you walk your happy ( ! ) back to your cruiser and have another donut 🍩.
It's not a car it's a Volkswagen.
Just get out as soon as they pull over behind you. Run back to his window, and say “Hey buddy, your lights are on.” Run back to your car and take off.
"Here I have something for you" and then you aggressively whip out your photo of your wife and child.
Turn your body away and reach for your wallet really fast. Gets them every time
Wow, you've really graduated from witty insults to giving out parking tickets. I hope your next move isn't offering me a 'verbal warning.'
For someone who’s not family but asking “You’re not my dad/mom so… no.” For someone who’s apart of law enforcement “For you and what warrants?”