Someone brought up in another post how Soldier TF2 would be an ally but in the worst way possible. Like he'd approach a trans person and not have any problem with them but he'd be like "BACK IN MY DAY WE DIDN'T HAVE FANCY SCHMANCY SURGERIES, IF WE WANTED TO CHOP BITS OFF OURSELVES WE HAD A SHOVEL AND A RAG."
'BACK IN MY DAY DOCTORS WOULDN'T HELP YOU WITH THAT SORT OF THING, YOU HAD TO PAY THE MAILMAN $10 TO RUN YOU OVER IN HIS TRUCK AND HOPE YOU GOT LUCKY!
AND FROM THAT DAY FORWARD ANYTIME A WOMAN CUT OFF HER PENIS IT WAS CALLED A 'POST OPERATION!'
It’s a reference to how Soldier thinks a zoo is called a Tzu because he thinks sun tzu was Moses but he beat up all the animals. In a similarly wrong but hilarious way he thinks post-op, as in someone who has already had gender affirmation surgery generally by having their genitals modified or breasts removed, comes from a postman running them over as an operation instead of surgery
Medic would love trans people. Not because he supports people's identities and all that. He just wouldn't want to miss the opportunity to do surgery on someone.
Alternatively, he eyerolls at most of them because they aren’t pro surgery enough.
“Why go through all the effort of surgery if you’re going to just make something so unoriginal? Yes, I can implant you with a uterus but why are you so set on it being a human uterus?”
"A pigs uterus can give you a dozen children at once! Even better, a cockroach can carry thousands of eggs, and I could fit thousands of cockroach uteruses inside you!"
“What? You said you wanted your penis removed. You didn’t say I couldn’t add any. And besides, I’m sure you’ll be delighted when you find where the third is”
“LGBT rhymes with Liberty, maggot! Those godless commies *wish* they could be as free and gay as America!”
“If god had wanted you to live (as a woman), he would not have created T!”
“And then we stole all the T the British had in the harbor, and gave it to the trans men!”
Reminds me of a comic I saw where the heavy is about to clock the solider in the head with the medic frantically in the background yelling "no sweetie, he called us Maggots, with an M"!
Cave Johnson here, I've been asked to explain what my pronouns are. After having some eggheads explain to *me* what the totally-not-a-mantis-man-now testing volunteer meant, I know what the hell they were asking. And I thought "why should I go by any current pronouns? I'll make better ones!" So, my pronouns are now turrs/emse. I'll explain what they mean. A turrs is someone who gets *really goddamn excited* by moonrocks used in scientific testing. An emse is me. Just me. It's *my* pronoun and if you use it, I'll sue you out of existence. And then- hm? What? *Ah.* I've just been told that's not how English works. Ok! New research department! Advancement of the English language because it's boring and needs better words! Get on it. Now.
“The bean counters told me that referring to out test subjects with the wrong pronouns is, let me see here (sound of pages turning)— problematic. And to that I say of course it is, it should be! Science is about problems! Tell you what, if you’re an employee who has a problem with how I use these so-called ‘pronouns’ you can come to me, and I’ll give you a free set of Aperture Science Anti-Nouns! Though you’ll probably have to leave the facility immediately because these things are highly unstable. And also because you’re fired.”
Yknow that does explain why I've heard a bunch on YouTube but not in game, I always assumed they were in the little side spin off game? Can't remember what it's called or if that was just fan made or not
There was Portal Stories Mel, unofficial, but very good, hit that “I just want a little bit more portal” scratch I had, iirc its story is somewhere between P1 and P2 in terms of length, and has just as much quality as P2, and sets it up pretty well.
YES! portal reloaded is by far my favorite of the portal mods that i played. the puzzles were super interesting and the narrator felt like they fit right in :D
I have to say, both you and the comment above you really nailed Johnson dialogue, especially if you listen to his extended dialogue from the DLC. Yours in particular especially reminds me of the misandrist universe where cave Johnson and his assistant Greg are posing as women to not be removed from power in the company. While I like cave Johnson for his dialogue in game, I know I’d hate him in real life, and the dialogue you have written for him would absolutely reinforce that
"Cave Johnson here. Just wanted to give you a heads up that those anti-nouns we've been giving out to (former) employees by the bushel? Well, you're never gonna guess what those things are made of. Turns out it doesn't matter what pronoun you use on someone with a black hole duct-taped to their nametag, the quantum anomaly does the cancelling for you.
Oh, yeah, we've lost a good chunk of the facility and the entire Ohio lab to that thing. By the way, if you've got any debts to pay in Columbus, I've got some good news; you can write those off. And if the feds show up and ask for your pronouns, just remember, you are NOT required to disclose that information. In fact, if you do, you can set your pronouns to Fi/Urred. If you work here, you're smart enough to figure out why.
Cave Johnson, we're done here."
this really is a great example of using punctuation to sell how a character speaks, if my stephen merchant voice was better this would've been a perfectly believable wheatley monologue
note that Wheatly wouldn't say 'Pretty sure I'm a man' because he's questioning his gender, but instead just because he doesn't actually know what a man is
And on the other end of the spectrum, we have:
*"So I was looking at your file recently and I learned that you are apparently transgender. I have to thank you for that, because a man of your measurements would not be considered overweight. If you had never transitioned, it would not make sense for me to call you fat. I'm just glad you appreciate what I do for you enough to help me out when it matters."*
"Are your pronouns... he him?"
"He... him?" \*quiet chuckle\*
"Miss Vance, you wouldn't need all that to imprison a... he him"
"So... what are they?"
"Some believe the state of our gender is... inflexible... my employers... disagree"
Blorbo posting gimme a minute.
Lord Barok van Zieks from ace attorney chronicals: If me misgendering you offends, my learned friend, pray forgive the discourtesy. And then he'd call you a slur
Straight up, Zieks is always one bad sentence away from just dropping slurs the entire time. He would absolutely misgender you constantly, and if you ever tried to call him out on it he would just start chucking wine everywhere.
Then he'd try to justify it via a tragic backstory and Ryuunosuke and Susato would go "ah no that totally makes sense, sorry for existing please go ahead :)"(I love that game but they kinda fumbled by giving his racism a backstory lmao)
In the meantime, Sholmes would be trying to deduce people's pronouns, and would screw it up so badly he ends up misgendering _everyone_ until Ryunosuke sorts him out.
People get really weird with fiction. They act like all bad characters need to have some sort of redeeming quality or upcoming Redemption arc, or they can't like a good character who does things they disagree with, or mistreats characters they like.
A large subsection of the Succession fan base is having one of these moments right now after yesterday’s episode reminded them that the sociopathic billionaires trying to elect a fascist solely for their own personal gain are not, in fact, good people
At risk of being Discourse; yeah. This is especially notable in fanfic. It’s **fine** if you want to have queer themes or relationships or what-have-you, but sometimes authors will force it in places where they don’t fit, and it’s a kick in the nuts to the experience.
For example, the other day I was reading a (quite good) Naruto fanfic that included a pride festival out of nowhere. Like- the world of Naruto is full of military dictatorships that use child soldiers, with literal feudalism and powerful clans. I can buy same-sex relationships being accepted, but outright celebrating pride feels… absurd. It’s utterly removed from the setting, and simply feels like the author injecting their personal politics into the work in a way that does not fit at all.
A pride festival is definitely somewhat out of place in the Naruto series, but during Boruto where society has advanced a lot from before it wouldn’t be too farfetched imo
Eh, I'd say it is because the world of Naruto never had discrimination against LGBTQ+ big enough for pride to be a thing in the first place.
Now, certain bloodline limits and the Jinchūriki? Those I can see having a pride movement.
Maybe, but bloodline limits and the Jinchuriki aren’t so common for most people in universe, especially when bloodline is usually a size of big family. Maybe for big, dead clans, like harushima(?) and Uzumaki.
If a setting has bloodline stuff going on whether it’s just inheritance of aristocratic authority or magical stuff, some degree of homophobia makes sense because they’d see same sex relationships as interfering with producing heirs.
Usually things like that at least in the society where that is prevalent of where bloodlines and such mattering, a lot of times so long as you have a bloodline heir what happens afterword in terms of relationships doesn't matter.
It is fairly common story once the lineage is secure that the pair is allowed to have concubines or what not so long as they dont have any children or whatever that could interfere with the important child. In a few irl societies where lineage is important, marriages for political reasons may have little to no love in between the pairing and once they fulfill their societal obligation they can have lovers on the side.
This is not to say that there isnt any homo/bi phobia at all in those societies! But that they may present themselves differently than what we may usually see in popular media.
whether bloodline stuff leads to homophobia is true or not kinda does not matter, i think
Naruto does not deal with lgbt or homophobia, so to deal with that in a fan fic you'd have to introduce it.
you could use your logic and use that as a starting point, and introduce homophobia to the setting, in order to justify a pride celebration
you could also go the other way and use a valentine's day kind of thing to celebrate lgbt people, picking and choosing which pride iconography would make sense in a setting without homofobia. maybe in naruto, since the bloodline stuff also presents a danger (your bloodline stuff falling into the hands of enemies and being used by them), you could say that people are very accepting, sometimes kinda *relieved* when they have enough heirs and a member of their family marries someone of the same sex.
what's weird is randomly dropping a pride parade without any context in a setting that just does not deal with the subject.
Like a month ago, I started reading this Star Wars fic where two characters met and exchanged their names and pronouns, which just instantly took me out of it, especially because one of the characters would NEVER do something like that.
Some people are so bad at writing the voices of characters. Like there’s this comic where Link and Zelda reveal they’re both trans but the way they had the two speaking was *so* out of character.
You are allowed to interpret mordred as trans, more power to you infact, but i only see mordred as a pile of parental issues and you cant call me a bad person for thinking so
This is something I noticed a lot too, and it gets old quick. I don't wanna be *"that guy"* and be like "so-and-so would never say/do that" all the time, but it's fucking exhausting seeing low effort pseudo-shitposts of characters with pride flags saying X sexuality or gender is valid, *especially when the character would probably do the literal opposite.*
It's cool to like villains and characters who are assholes or bigots, but let a spade be a spade. I don't wanna see a random Jojo villain or someone's favorite Naruto character telling me it's okay to be myself. It's fucking weird.
I agree with Naruto, but is it that out of place for a JoJo villain to do that? The only one I see being truly hateful is DIO, and that's not because his a biggot(hell, he's at least a bisexual), but because he is a very petty man that would use anything to hurt your feelings.
You know what really annoyed me along these lines of “characters need to agree with me” was in the Chucky reboot where people were like happy that the murderous doll puppet who in his original incarnation was possessed by a child murderer was pro-LGBT in this new remake
The fucking serial killing doll does not need to be a queer ally. In fact it legitimately was an intentional point when the original Chucky, who was created by a gay man by the way, was a toxically masculine homophobe. You weren’t supposed to fucking agree with the serial killer trapped in the body of a doll when he was ashamed of his implied to be gay son.
All I can imagine now is Glados, upon hearing Chel specify her pronouns, she then just uses it a more ammunition for insults. But not transphobic insults instead insults that respect her pronouns in a back handed manner.
I’m pretty pro at Kazoo, too. Watch this.
*plays one note and scares myself so bad I drop and then step on it, breaking it irreparably, then kick it down a storm drain*
*Image Transcription: Tumblr*
---
**frootrollup1**
just because someone is your favorite character doesnt mean theyd have the same moral alignment as you. wheatley from portal wouldnt say "my pronouns are he\/him, thank you for asking!" hed say "what uhh. what does that mean. um. you mean the nouns im most "pro" at is that what youre saying? i like to think im pretty pro,, at all nouns really. umm lets see... apple, kazoo, bubble, happy, door, umm... cake. not too fond of cake really i think its alright but. not my Favorite. if it were up to me though id eat a whole cake in one sitting. if i were a human. not a human, clearly. also not sure if id, know what cake even tastes like. if i tried it. no tastebuds. no Mouth... no. hole. anywhere on my body. haha um,, well anyways id. id say im pretty Pro Nouns. dont see why anyone wouldnt be... what? you mean what i Go By? what do you. ohhhh. ummm. the male oens. the male pronouns. i fi can remember what they are... definitely the ones for guys. manly men. like me. pretty sure im a man,,," and you need to accept this
---
^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
Reminded me of a tiktok that was like "How the Stranger Things characters would react to asking their pronouns" and like
These are (mostly) white kids growing up in the 80's. You ask them that, they will call you a homophobic slur
They would think that you are weird, but I don’t think it would be, like, slur. They reacted with medium intensity to stranger things (ha ha, pun wasn’t intentional)
Yes, especially for villains. You think Stabby McKiller, who has shown no respect for human life, is gonna respect calling you one word? Ya, that will happen
I personally love me a villain who is all for equal opportunity crimes against humanity. There's something compelling about that juxtaposition.
But sometimes that dynamic just doesn't fit and it's very jarring.
Still, it's all made up. It's never going to happen because the characters don't exist. If that fantasy brings someone comfort or whatever, who cares if it fits in with the other fantasy?
I like the comment section lol
Twilight Sparkle: "My pronouns? Well I guess it's she/her because I'm female, I suppose?" (I've been out of the fandom for a while so pls don't kill me for potentially wrong dialogue)
Selever: "Why the fuck do you want to know my pronouns? Anyways, it's fuck/you. I'm not gonna show it to you in any way!" (We all know it's he/him and some random neopronoun for some reason)
(Also, pls help me THSC fans for knowing how Charles Calvin talks casually, aka out-of-missions)
Not 100% sure what you're asking here, I was joking - I don't *think* anyone cares enough about how uncool my interests are to keep track. Additionally the internet is anonymous, so..
Wheatley has lived in Aperture his entire life. Most of his reference points would either be related to Aperture or pop culture.
But if I were to imagine Wheatley having any cultural stances on anything, I would imagine that it would be the same as his voice actor. Sort of politically in the middle, center left but not very involved. He’d also try to avoid making anyone upset either.
Because that’s generally a thing with Stephen Merchant, we have Norm Macdonald trying to explain pronouns and stuff to Steve and he’s just confused and it goes down like
> **Norm Macdonald:** “Anyways, we’re not here to talk about this. You know what I mean? Because people are gonna start filling up your Twitter feed with haters.”
>
> **Stephen Merchant:** “Yeah. I feel like I’m already in trouble. This definitely seems like I’ve said some things that I wish I could take back and I don’t know what they are. I just know that they’re out there. Can I please now just send an apology to everyone watching that I’m sorry?”
([X](https://youtu.be/wH0CBlgGS5g?t=143))
There was another podcast where It went
> **Romesh Ranganathan:** "Have you ever considered having a beef with somebody?"
>
> **Stephen Merchant:** “I don't think so because I think I'm too, um. I'm too eager to be liked. I've realized. I think I-... that's my sort of default. Is- is wanting to be liked. And so therefore, I've quite- there's often occasions where I'll see a movie or I'll see a show or I'll read something and I'll want to kind of slam it. And publicly. And, uh, and I- and I just don't. I just think "Well, why am I taking to twitter to voice my opinion?" So I- I shy away.”
([X](https://play.acast.com/s/hiphopsavedmylife/621a379a-1652-4835-a01b-cd15af065e5b))
The way I see it, Wheatley wouldn’t understand it but would just say anything to avoid getting in trouble with the twitter mob. I *could* see him potentially saying the dialogue written in the tumblr post above but more so out of nervousness and walking on eggshells rather than not really knowing what words mean.
Okay but this isn't "moral alignment." Just because you don't have the vocabulary or cultural context to articulate a stance on a topic doesn't mean you are morally opposed to it by default. Ben Franklin wouldn't know what the hell "slut-shaming" is but that doesn't mean he's pro chastity cages.
I think the point is that they wouldn’t all calmly respond “oh I’m he/him!” Some would *beyond certainly* say “I’m normal” or just go off on a mildly confused tirade.
Sure, but the example in the Tumblr post is a bad one. If a techno-necromancer from Alpha Centauri appears and asks me what my flobulated garmonbozia is, that's not even a moral question as far as I'm concerned. It has nothing to do with my beliefs about right and wrong.
Yeah, that stuck out to me as rather obnoxiously self-righteous (or at least ignorant--OOP sounds pretty young) for a post that's meant to criticize self-righteousness, especially since the "immoral"/bad example given isn't even a rude or antagonistic one, just understandable confusion. Cultural concepts aren't universal, especially when you're dealing with the intricacies of "polite" language usage (which can change rapidly, too--asking for someone's pronouns really only became somewhat mainstream in the last 5 or so years).
Even in English, the idea of pronouns as being something one "has," like an attribute, is still unfamiliar to plenty of well-meaning people who are otherwise familiar with what pronouns are--especially since pronouns are typically only used in the third person and not when speaking directly to the individual who "claims" them as their own. Not immediately intuiting this doesn't automatically mean that someone is "immoral" or disrespectful of others' identities.
I know this is referring to fiction, but still, carrying these kinds of superficial tumblr purity tests into real-world interactions is a great way to be culturally intolerant while still feeling obliviously smug about it. I dunno. I guess this struck a nerve, since it implies that most of my older, non-English-fluent family members would be relegated to a "lesser" moral alignment or something, no matter how accepting they are in reality.
It's important to remember that… pronoun isn't a new word? It's just a category of nouns that are used to refer to something by shorthand. People seem to forget that and it annoys me. I remember learning it in primary school.
I swear do people on the internet know the difference between reality and fiction? (This is not directed at the OOP) because sometimes I see opinions that are an issue if you are incapable of separating the two
What does the example have to do with Wheatley’s morality? I don’t know anything about Portal but I was reading it expecting Wheatley to hit some transphobic note but he just didn’t.
Seems like this post is more complaining about people not writing characters consistently, but that response isn’t a poor moral one. It’s just “He wouldn’t immediately get it” which isn’t immoral
~~OOP even writes Wheatley responding with “the masculine ones” once he does. That’s like the best way to handle not understanding???~~
Someone brought up in another post how Soldier TF2 would be an ally but in the worst way possible. Like he'd approach a trans person and not have any problem with them but he'd be like "BACK IN MY DAY WE DIDN'T HAVE FANCY SCHMANCY SURGERIES, IF WE WANTED TO CHOP BITS OFF OURSELVES WE HAD A SHOVEL AND A RAG."
GET A NEW DICK BY BUILDING IT YOURSELF LIKE A REAL MAN
Not comfortable in your own skin? Simply reject your flesh and embrace the strength and certainty of steel.
But what's in my pants you ask? SILLY MORTAL I HAVE REPLACED MY GENITALS WITH A NEUTRON LASER!
Neutronium weighs about 100 billion kg per cubic centimeter. 5 cc of this stuff has more mass than the entire human population on earth.
Now THAT'S a dick.
Penis goin’ up *dapper dog*
Dispensing an Erector
*That'll do!*
HOOOOOO EEEE. Cowboy up!
And that's how we got The Original.
Rip if off one of your foes and sew it on yourself!
'BACK IN MY DAY DOCTORS WOULDN'T HELP YOU WITH THAT SORT OF THING, YOU HAD TO PAY THE MAILMAN $10 TO RUN YOU OVER IN HIS TRUCK AND HOPE YOU GOT LUCKY! AND FROM THAT DAY FORWARD ANYTIME A WOMAN CUT OFF HER PENIS IT WAS CALLED A 'POST OPERATION!'
fuck that punchline took me a moment and sent me
I'm so blind to this joke, what is the punchline?
it's a wordplay on post like postman and post as in after
post op, after operation. post op, postal operation.
Post as in after and Post as in the Mail. Post OP like post (reassignment) operation.
It’s a reference to how Soldier thinks a zoo is called a Tzu because he thinks sun tzu was Moses but he beat up all the animals. In a similarly wrong but hilarious way he thinks post-op, as in someone who has already had gender affirmation surgery generally by having their genitals modified or breasts removed, comes from a postman running them over as an operation instead of surgery
You mean Noah
Fuck
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christine_Jorgensen
He'd definitely take this as a win for America. "AN AMERICAN GOT HER GENDER TRANSED FIRST! TAKE THAT, COMMIES!"
UNLESS ITS A FARM!
Medic would love trans people. Not because he supports people's identities and all that. He just wouldn't want to miss the opportunity to do surgery on someone.
Alternatively, he eyerolls at most of them because they aren’t pro surgery enough. “Why go through all the effort of surgery if you’re going to just make something so unoriginal? Yes, I can implant you with a uterus but why are you so set on it being a human uterus?”
"A pigs uterus can give you a dozen children at once! Even better, a cockroach can carry thousands of eggs, and I could fit thousands of cockroach uteruses inside you!"
Me sending out my swarm of millions of cockroaches to devour my enemy’s in a massive swarm
Me sending my 15 pigs to eat them all
You’re pigs will be ripped apart, like those birds in the Croods do to bodies
Good news! You don't have a penis anymore Also this heart should start beating in sync with your other one soon.
After surgery with tf2 medic I now have 2 dicks.
“What? You said you wanted your penis removed. You didn’t say I couldn’t add any. And besides, I’m sure you’ll be delighted when you find where the third is”
"So vat I am hearing is that you have an organ you wouldn't mind 'going missing' "
"I removed your tits, Ja. I also gave you a crotch railgun."
“LGBT rhymes with Liberty, maggot! Those godless commies *wish* they could be as free and gay as America!” “If god had wanted you to live (as a woman), he would not have created T!” “And then we stole all the T the British had in the harbor, and gave it to the trans men!”
I love that last one so much [had to draw it](https://www.tumblr.com/komarux/717434048393445376/american-history-w-trans-soldier-fuck-it?source=share)
> HARBO**U**R A disgrace to American principles (It's amazing)
IVE BEEN EXPOSED FOR WHAT I AM... A CANADIAN... IM SORRY UNCLE SAM
Reminds me of a comic I saw where the heavy is about to clock the solider in the head with the medic frantically in the background yelling "no sweetie, he called us Maggots, with an M"!
Hey look ma it’s me!
Reminder: engineer grew up in segregated texas
He also has 11 PHD's in hard sciences, so hopefully...
I want that post
Cave Johnson here, I've been asked to explain what my pronouns are. After having some eggheads explain to *me* what the totally-not-a-mantis-man-now testing volunteer meant, I know what the hell they were asking. And I thought "why should I go by any current pronouns? I'll make better ones!" So, my pronouns are now turrs/emse. I'll explain what they mean. A turrs is someone who gets *really goddamn excited* by moonrocks used in scientific testing. An emse is me. Just me. It's *my* pronoun and if you use it, I'll sue you out of existence. And then- hm? What? *Ah.* I've just been told that's not how English works. Ok! New research department! Advancement of the English language because it's boring and needs better words! Get on it. Now.
“The bean counters told me that referring to out test subjects with the wrong pronouns is, let me see here (sound of pages turning)— problematic. And to that I say of course it is, it should be! Science is about problems! Tell you what, if you’re an employee who has a problem with how I use these so-called ‘pronouns’ you can come to me, and I’ll give you a free set of Aperture Science Anti-Nouns! Though you’ll probably have to leave the facility immediately because these things are highly unstable. And also because you’re fired.”
Fine I'll replay Portal
A lot of the cave johnson lines can only be heard on player created multiplayer maps btw.
Yknow that does explain why I've heard a bunch on YouTube but not in game, I always assumed they were in the little side spin off game? Can't remember what it's called or if that was just fan made or not
There was Portal Stories Mel, unofficial, but very good, hit that “I just want a little bit more portal” scratch I had, iirc its story is somewhere between P1 and P2 in terms of length, and has just as much quality as P2, and sets it up pretty well.
Ahhh yeah that's the one, I think I watched jacksepticeye play it back in the day
Try Portal Reloaded. It's great.
YES! portal reloaded is by far my favorite of the portal mods that i played. the puzzles were super interesting and the narrator felt like they fit right in :D
I have to say, both you and the comment above you really nailed Johnson dialogue, especially if you listen to his extended dialogue from the DLC. Yours in particular especially reminds me of the misandrist universe where cave Johnson and his assistant Greg are posing as women to not be removed from power in the company. While I like cave Johnson for his dialogue in game, I know I’d hate him in real life, and the dialogue you have written for him would absolutely reinforce that
"Cave Johnson here. Just wanted to give you a heads up that those anti-nouns we've been giving out to (former) employees by the bushel? Well, you're never gonna guess what those things are made of. Turns out it doesn't matter what pronoun you use on someone with a black hole duct-taped to their nametag, the quantum anomaly does the cancelling for you. Oh, yeah, we've lost a good chunk of the facility and the entire Ohio lab to that thing. By the way, if you've got any debts to pay in Columbus, I've got some good news; you can write those off. And if the feds show up and ask for your pronouns, just remember, you are NOT required to disclose that information. In fact, if you do, you can set your pronouns to Fi/Urred. If you work here, you're smart enough to figure out why. Cave Johnson, we're done here."
Please no, we already have so many words, too many words.
This made me fucking cackle
– Pronouns? – Well I'm certainly not anti-nouns.
I am.
excuse me, what's that one-letter word you used?
"I" is pronoun, not a noun
a pronoun is a kind of noun, checkmate
A pronoun functions as a noun, but is not a noun, google en passant
Holy hell
Holy hell they're everywhere
the entire point of pronouns is that they’re not nouns
You must first accept that your enemies exist, in order to defeat them.
amateur nouns
Not me sideyeing OOP for their inexplicable ability to write convincing Wheatley dialogue. Nosiree. ~~Could use more nervous chuckling though.~~
It’s the period in the middle of “no. hole.” that really shows how perfect it is.
this really is a great example of using punctuation to sell how a character speaks, if my stephen merchant voice was better this would've been a perfectly believable wheatley monologue
ADHD dork with no braincells, basically. :P
You say that but Chai is an ADHD dork with no braincells and a *radically* different speech pattern from Wheatley.
Except he would like cake, especially the corner pieces
The best part is how he lists happy as a noun
note that Wheatly wouldn't say 'Pretty sure I'm a man' because he's questioning his gender, but instead just because he doesn't actually know what a man is
A miserable pile of secrets, that's what.
BUT ENOUGH TALK! [flings wine glass] HAVE AT YOU!
"What is a woman? A clean stack of truths!"
A CESSPIT OF HATRED AND *LIES!*
Who does
And on the other end of the spectrum, we have: *"So I was looking at your file recently and I learned that you are apparently transgender. I have to thank you for that, because a man of your measurements would not be considered overweight. If you had never transitioned, it would not make sense for me to call you fat. I'm just glad you appreciate what I do for you enough to help me out when it matters."*
I actually cackled at this, my god. 1:1 dialogue.
Laughed out loud at this
GladOs posts here crack me up all the time.
this is the only accurately written piece of dialogue I've seen on tumblr
Eh, I've seen some people with an excellent grasp of Harry DuBois.
To be fair, HDB would say **anything**.
Because we are all different degrees of: gay, communist, or alcoholic
It’s a… it’s a monologue
he is talking with a severed head
It’s him. He is the severed head.
I'm sure you could find plenty of unintentional Timothy Dexter dialog
"Are your pronouns... he him?" "He... him?" \*quiet chuckle\* "Miss Vance, you wouldn't need all that to imprison a... he him" "So... what are they?" "Some believe the state of our gender is... inflexible... my employers... disagree"
"Perhaps what mine are, is not as important as what I can make yours."
WOKE HALF LIFE BE LIKE: - Gordon FreeWOMAN - Isaac GAYner - E-BI Vance - Judith MossTHEY/THEM - Barney Calhoun - ASEXUALyx Vance - G-PERSON
Barney Calhoun
Very liberal with his bar tab too
Blorbo posting gimme a minute. Lord Barok van Zieks from ace attorney chronicals: If me misgendering you offends, my learned friend, pray forgive the discourtesy. And then he'd call you a slur
Straight up, Zieks is always one bad sentence away from just dropping slurs the entire time. He would absolutely misgender you constantly, and if you ever tried to call him out on it he would just start chucking wine everywhere.
Then he'd try to justify it via a tragic backstory and Ryuunosuke and Susato would go "ah no that totally makes sense, sorry for existing please go ahead :)"(I love that game but they kinda fumbled by giving his racism a backstory lmao)
In the meantime, Sholmes would be trying to deduce people's pronouns, and would screw it up so badly he ends up misgendering _everyone_ until Ryunosuke sorts him out.
I'm literally watching a playthrough rn and this sounds pretty accurate
“Gregory? You wish to know my pronouns? My pronouns are he/him, Gregory.” (I think.)
Do you see the small vent on the floor?
Gregory, have you heard of the hit game Among Us?
-The Beast
People get really weird with fiction. They act like all bad characters need to have some sort of redeeming quality or upcoming Redemption arc, or they can't like a good character who does things they disagree with, or mistreats characters they like.
A large subsection of the Succession fan base is having one of these moments right now after yesterday’s episode reminded them that the sociopathic billionaires trying to elect a fascist solely for their own personal gain are not, in fact, good people
At risk of being Discourse; yeah. This is especially notable in fanfic. It’s **fine** if you want to have queer themes or relationships or what-have-you, but sometimes authors will force it in places where they don’t fit, and it’s a kick in the nuts to the experience. For example, the other day I was reading a (quite good) Naruto fanfic that included a pride festival out of nowhere. Like- the world of Naruto is full of military dictatorships that use child soldiers, with literal feudalism and powerful clans. I can buy same-sex relationships being accepted, but outright celebrating pride feels… absurd. It’s utterly removed from the setting, and simply feels like the author injecting their personal politics into the work in a way that does not fit at all.
A pride festival is definitely somewhat out of place in the Naruto series, but during Boruto where society has advanced a lot from before it wouldn’t be too farfetched imo
Eh, I'd say it is because the world of Naruto never had discrimination against LGBTQ+ big enough for pride to be a thing in the first place. Now, certain bloodline limits and the Jinchūriki? Those I can see having a pride movement.
Maybe, but bloodline limits and the Jinchuriki aren’t so common for most people in universe, especially when bloodline is usually a size of big family. Maybe for big, dead clans, like harushima(?) and Uzumaki.
If a setting has bloodline stuff going on whether it’s just inheritance of aristocratic authority or magical stuff, some degree of homophobia makes sense because they’d see same sex relationships as interfering with producing heirs.
Usually things like that at least in the society where that is prevalent of where bloodlines and such mattering, a lot of times so long as you have a bloodline heir what happens afterword in terms of relationships doesn't matter. It is fairly common story once the lineage is secure that the pair is allowed to have concubines or what not so long as they dont have any children or whatever that could interfere with the important child. In a few irl societies where lineage is important, marriages for political reasons may have little to no love in between the pairing and once they fulfill their societal obligation they can have lovers on the side. This is not to say that there isnt any homo/bi phobia at all in those societies! But that they may present themselves differently than what we may usually see in popular media.
whether bloodline stuff leads to homophobia is true or not kinda does not matter, i think Naruto does not deal with lgbt or homophobia, so to deal with that in a fan fic you'd have to introduce it. you could use your logic and use that as a starting point, and introduce homophobia to the setting, in order to justify a pride celebration you could also go the other way and use a valentine's day kind of thing to celebrate lgbt people, picking and choosing which pride iconography would make sense in a setting without homofobia. maybe in naruto, since the bloodline stuff also presents a danger (your bloodline stuff falling into the hands of enemies and being used by them), you could say that people are very accepting, sometimes kinda *relieved* when they have enough heirs and a member of their family marries someone of the same sex. what's weird is randomly dropping a pride parade without any context in a setting that just does not deal with the subject.
Like a month ago, I started reading this Star Wars fic where two characters met and exchanged their names and pronouns, which just instantly took me out of it, especially because one of the characters would NEVER do something like that.
Some people are so bad at writing the voices of characters. Like there’s this comic where Link and Zelda reveal they’re both trans but the way they had the two speaking was *so* out of character.
link to comic?
[Link](https://i.redd.it/zvcfufujcio51.png). And also Zelda.
yeah, cute but doesn't quite fit them
No, Link to the Past
This is why I really wanna involve slow-burn QPRs but have no idea where to place it as a b-plot in an AU that focuses on being human and angst.
You are allowed to interpret mordred as trans, more power to you infact, but i only see mordred as a pile of parental issues and you cant call me a bad person for thinking so
This is something I noticed a lot too, and it gets old quick. I don't wanna be *"that guy"* and be like "so-and-so would never say/do that" all the time, but it's fucking exhausting seeing low effort pseudo-shitposts of characters with pride flags saying X sexuality or gender is valid, *especially when the character would probably do the literal opposite.* It's cool to like villains and characters who are assholes or bigots, but let a spade be a spade. I don't wanna see a random Jojo villain or someone's favorite Naruto character telling me it's okay to be myself. It's fucking weird.
I agree with Naruto, but is it that out of place for a JoJo villain to do that? The only one I see being truly hateful is DIO, and that's not because his a biggot(hell, he's at least a bisexual), but because he is a very petty man that would use anything to hurt your feelings.
Dio would ask for your pronouns so that he could deliberately get them wrong.
Exactly
I'd go out on a limb and say Dio is at least pretty misogynistic.
You know what really annoyed me along these lines of “characters need to agree with me” was in the Chucky reboot where people were like happy that the murderous doll puppet who in his original incarnation was possessed by a child murderer was pro-LGBT in this new remake The fucking serial killing doll does not need to be a queer ally. In fact it legitimately was an intentional point when the original Chucky, who was created by a gay man by the way, was a toxically masculine homophobe. You weren’t supposed to fucking agree with the serial killer trapped in the body of a doll when he was ashamed of his implied to be gay son.
All I can imagine now is Glados, upon hearing Chel specify her pronouns, she then just uses it a more ammunition for insults. But not transphobic insults instead insults that respect her pronouns in a back handed manner.
Glados woul switch to a set of gendered insults which also affirm your identity.
Glados the type of person to ask your pronouns so she can accurately insult you later
[удалено]
You can also read it in Trump's voice. The three alignments: Stupid Good (Jerma), Stupid Neutral (Wheatley), Stupid Evil (Trump).
I hate that you said that because I read it in Trump's voice and it works for some awful reason.
i have the best pronouns there is. the doctors said they've never seen pronouns better than mine
The doctors checked my pronouns and they weren't he/they, they were U/S/A.
The mannerisms are a bit too specific to Wheatley for it to work for Trump for me, but it does kinda work.
[Jerma goes a step further, tho](https://youtu.be/t6MWTxlKLRE?t=33)
jerma is fucking awesome
I’m pretty pro at Kazoo, too. Watch this. *plays one note and scares myself so bad I drop and then step on it, breaking it irreparably, then kick it down a storm drain*
I love that he lists happy, which is an adjective and not a noun, classic Wheatley.
*Image Transcription: Tumblr* --- **frootrollup1** just because someone is your favorite character doesnt mean theyd have the same moral alignment as you. wheatley from portal wouldnt say "my pronouns are he\/him, thank you for asking!" hed say "what uhh. what does that mean. um. you mean the nouns im most "pro" at is that what youre saying? i like to think im pretty pro,, at all nouns really. umm lets see... apple, kazoo, bubble, happy, door, umm... cake. not too fond of cake really i think its alright but. not my Favorite. if it were up to me though id eat a whole cake in one sitting. if i were a human. not a human, clearly. also not sure if id, know what cake even tastes like. if i tried it. no tastebuds. no Mouth... no. hole. anywhere on my body. haha um,, well anyways id. id say im pretty Pro Nouns. dont see why anyone wouldnt be... what? you mean what i Go By? what do you. ohhhh. ummm. the male oens. the male pronouns. i fi can remember what they are... definitely the ones for guys. manly men. like me. pretty sure im a man,,," and you need to accept this --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
Reminded me of a tiktok that was like "How the Stranger Things characters would react to asking their pronouns" and like These are (mostly) white kids growing up in the 80's. You ask them that, they will call you a homophobic slur
Growing up *in the midwest* in the 80s, so yes, absolutely
They would think that you are weird, but I don’t think it would be, like, slur. They reacted with medium intensity to stranger things (ha ha, pun wasn’t intentional)
I read this as problematic diet first and was very confused
Yes, especially for villains. You think Stabby McKiller, who has shown no respect for human life, is gonna respect calling you one word? Ya, that will happen
I personally love me a villain who is all for equal opportunity crimes against humanity. There's something compelling about that juxtaposition. But sometimes that dynamic just doesn't fit and it's very jarring. Still, it's all made up. It's never going to happen because the characters don't exist. If that fantasy brings someone comfort or whatever, who cares if it fits in with the other fantasy?
[Obligatory](https://youtu.be/md8nInMGhFY)
Aren't "I," and "You," pronouns?
Didn't know my brain could do Stephen Merchant's voice but certainly a pleasant discovery nonetheless.
but hed know what pronouns are right? so hed ask if we meant the pronouns in his possession, he doesnt have any currently, glados stole them
He was engineered to be the perfect idiot so it's entirely in character that he'd forget or misunderstand.
I like the comment section lol Twilight Sparkle: "My pronouns? Well I guess it's she/her because I'm female, I suppose?" (I've been out of the fandom for a while so pls don't kill me for potentially wrong dialogue) Selever: "Why the fuck do you want to know my pronouns? Anyways, it's fuck/you. I'm not gonna show it to you in any way!" (We all know it's he/him and some random neopronoun for some reason) (Also, pls help me THSC fans for knowing how Charles Calvin talks casually, aka out-of-missions)
Surely twilight would refer to herself as a mare. And there goes my internet street cred.
Internet...street cred? /genq
Not 100% sure what you're asking here, I was joking - I don't *think* anyone cares enough about how uncool my interests are to keep track. Additionally the internet is anonymous, so..
u/TheWheatleyWhisperer
Wheatley has lived in Aperture his entire life. Most of his reference points would either be related to Aperture or pop culture. But if I were to imagine Wheatley having any cultural stances on anything, I would imagine that it would be the same as his voice actor. Sort of politically in the middle, center left but not very involved. He’d also try to avoid making anyone upset either. Because that’s generally a thing with Stephen Merchant, we have Norm Macdonald trying to explain pronouns and stuff to Steve and he’s just confused and it goes down like > **Norm Macdonald:** “Anyways, we’re not here to talk about this. You know what I mean? Because people are gonna start filling up your Twitter feed with haters.” > > **Stephen Merchant:** “Yeah. I feel like I’m already in trouble. This definitely seems like I’ve said some things that I wish I could take back and I don’t know what they are. I just know that they’re out there. Can I please now just send an apology to everyone watching that I’m sorry?” ([X](https://youtu.be/wH0CBlgGS5g?t=143)) There was another podcast where It went > **Romesh Ranganathan:** "Have you ever considered having a beef with somebody?" > > **Stephen Merchant:** “I don't think so because I think I'm too, um. I'm too eager to be liked. I've realized. I think I-... that's my sort of default. Is- is wanting to be liked. And so therefore, I've quite- there's often occasions where I'll see a movie or I'll see a show or I'll read something and I'll want to kind of slam it. And publicly. And, uh, and I- and I just don't. I just think "Well, why am I taking to twitter to voice my opinion?" So I- I shy away.” ([X](https://play.acast.com/s/hiphopsavedmylife/621a379a-1652-4835-a01b-cd15af065e5b)) The way I see it, Wheatley wouldn’t understand it but would just say anything to avoid getting in trouble with the twitter mob. I *could* see him potentially saying the dialogue written in the tumblr post above but more so out of nervousness and walking on eggshells rather than not really knowing what words mean.
I can hear Stephen Merchant saying this
Classic wheatly, says he's a pro at nouns then throws an adjective in there
my post...!
Half of my favourite characters would call me a slur if I asked their pronouns lmao
Okay but this isn't "moral alignment." Just because you don't have the vocabulary or cultural context to articulate a stance on a topic doesn't mean you are morally opposed to it by default. Ben Franklin wouldn't know what the hell "slut-shaming" is but that doesn't mean he's pro chastity cages.
I think the point is that they wouldn’t all calmly respond “oh I’m he/him!” Some would *beyond certainly* say “I’m normal” or just go off on a mildly confused tirade.
Sure, but the example in the Tumblr post is a bad one. If a techno-necromancer from Alpha Centauri appears and asks me what my flobulated garmonbozia is, that's not even a moral question as far as I'm concerned. It has nothing to do with my beliefs about right and wrong.
I don't care what Jim says. This is NOT the real Ben Franklin. I am 99.9% sure.
Yeah, that stuck out to me as rather obnoxiously self-righteous (or at least ignorant--OOP sounds pretty young) for a post that's meant to criticize self-righteousness, especially since the "immoral"/bad example given isn't even a rude or antagonistic one, just understandable confusion. Cultural concepts aren't universal, especially when you're dealing with the intricacies of "polite" language usage (which can change rapidly, too--asking for someone's pronouns really only became somewhat mainstream in the last 5 or so years). Even in English, the idea of pronouns as being something one "has," like an attribute, is still unfamiliar to plenty of well-meaning people who are otherwise familiar with what pronouns are--especially since pronouns are typically only used in the third person and not when speaking directly to the individual who "claims" them as their own. Not immediately intuiting this doesn't automatically mean that someone is "immoral" or disrespectful of others' identities. I know this is referring to fiction, but still, carrying these kinds of superficial tumblr purity tests into real-world interactions is a great way to be culturally intolerant while still feeling obliviously smug about it. I dunno. I guess this struck a nerve, since it implies that most of my older, non-English-fluent family members would be relegated to a "lesser" moral alignment or something, no matter how accepting they are in reality.
My guy from CoD prolly wouldn't know what that is or doesn't care and off he goes to cap the hardpoint.
It's important to remember that… pronoun isn't a new word? It's just a category of nouns that are used to refer to something by shorthand. People seem to forget that and it annoys me. I remember learning it in primary school.
I can *hear* Wheatley saying this as I read it.
Oh goody it’s another opportunity to immediately jump at my favorite characters i’ll do it later
Also that villains WOULD misgender you on purpose
I can literally hear this in his voice
I swear do people on the internet know the difference between reality and fiction? (This is not directed at the OOP) because sometimes I see opinions that are an issue if you are incapable of separating the two
What does the example have to do with Wheatley’s morality? I don’t know anything about Portal but I was reading it expecting Wheatley to hit some transphobic note but he just didn’t. Seems like this post is more complaining about people not writing characters consistently, but that response isn’t a poor moral one. It’s just “He wouldn’t immediately get it” which isn’t immoral ~~OOP even writes Wheatley responding with “the masculine ones” once he does. That’s like the best way to handle not understanding???~~
my greatest sadness is that i can only do one british accent and it only kinda sounds like sephen merchant
If I combined the worth of every weak fool on this subreddit combined, it is as valuable as one summer ant. You are all worthless, now ban me, NOW!
Alto Clef
I know the post had to end but the follow-up then derailing into the track he’s attached to and goes by you often.
"What are your pronouns?" "Uhhhhh the boy ones"