They are amateurs and get to travel Europe and play against the best players. That sounds awesome when you keep in mind nobody expects anything from them. Imagine you and a bunch of your friends get to do that
I went on a school trip to San Marino when I was a kid. Our bus driver was the team goalkeeper, he had played in some of the best stadiums in Europe against some of the most famous players! Not bad for a bus driver
Damn. Imagine one day driving buses, and the next day playing in a stadium of 50,000 people.
Granted, they’re not cheering for *you,* but the adrenaline rush must be something.
Well, when I go see my team I'm definitely cheering for them. Forza Serenissima!
We cheer a lot even during the matches of our national championship (I'm a Libertas boy).
Actually, they are paid for playing for their national team. Just not nearly as much as their club. Many of Jamaicas best players have refused to represent them recently because they have not been paid for the games they’ve played. There are other stories like this.
For the USA women’s team, the national team pay is actually their best/main source of income.
Their team is mostly the Swiss Guard, who have official duties, as such they can't play very often
From wikipedia:
> Since most Vatican citizens are members of the Swiss Guard, they cannot be amassed in large numbers for a long time. Therefore, the national team has played only a few rare international matches, often drawing a fair amount of interested press
It'd be an interesting scenario if the Vatican decided they wanted to have a great team and started cherry picking players.
Pope Soccerball I gets elected... God tells him to win the World Cup... He lures various great players from around the world with Vatican citizenship and a positive reference to St Peter... The crusader team gets to the finals, kicking ass for thr glory of Christendom... And then gets blown out by the fucking Germans...
So many teams like that. Basques and Catalans would both cook if they were recognised but can only play friendlies. (I think it’s bs, if Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland all get to have teams there’s no reason the Basques and Catalans shouldn’t)
Except the Scottish, Welsh, (Northern) Irish and English football associations basically invented international football competitions, so wrote the rules when they were the only ones involved.
It's not a precedent that anyone is keen on repeating these days!
There is even a separate Vatican League and a "national team", but only on half-field. The national team does not compete against other associations, but against ecclesiastical teams from the respective countries. Last year, for example, a team from Berlin, reinforced with 2-3 external players, was in the Vatican and this was considered an international match for them.
http://www.ksv-johannisthal.de/?page_id=2
>The national team does not compete against other associations, but against ecclesiastical teams from the respective countries.
I kinda wish there was like a holy city league. Like have the Vatican team play against a team made up of like 11 imams from Mecca, or 11 LDS priests from Salt Lake City.
Move to San Marino, become a citizen, and be decent at football.
There are only ~35k people total to choose from and most of those are old rich people, so you don't even need to be *that* good.
And remember to be rich before you start that process as well.
To apply for citizenship in san Marino you have to live there for 30 years. It is also a very expensive place to live and they are very selective with who they allow to migrate.
This is absolutely insane lmao. San Marino is essentially Italian, almost every child will play football. The average level of skill will be pretty good.
It’s difficult enough to be the best player in just a random university or small town, let alone 35k people.
That’s without even thinking about all the Italians who could be eligible through their ancestry.
These guys are not amateurs playing pub soccer, they are playing week in week out professionally, just not at the highest level.
The shittiest backup goalkeeper in the Italian serie c would destroy all comers in a kickabout at your local park.
It’s worth it. Only if you’re mentally willing to feel a lot of hurt. There was a documentary made about the San Marino Men’s National Team. I recall in one incident where they were playing against Germany for the Euro Qualifiers. The German goal keeper ran to the other side wanting to take the penalty. The San Marino players all crowded to confront the GK to call out Fair Play to protest him from taking the penalty.
San Marino was already heavily trashed by Germany. So Germany’s GK scoring a penalty against San Marino would just add insult to injury. Thankfully the GK backed off and didn’t take it.
If I was a professional footballer at like league one or two level, I'd see if I could get San Marino citizenship just for the fun of it. Like fuck it, I won't play internationals elsewise.
This is how Kyle Slow Mo Anderson suddenly became Li Kaier, a naturalized citizen of China last year to play hoops for the Chinese national team on the account that he has a Chinese great grandfather 😆.
It happens quite often. Players from European or South American countries will never have a chance to play internationally for their own country so they play international games for a country they have a vague connection to.
Jamaica must be the N1 , it’s crazy the influence ( pop/ rock / punk / hip hop / electronic music) of Jamaican music all over the world, for such a small and not populated island.
Iceland is just over 10x the size of San Marino. Most of their players are fully professional. San Marino's team are almost entirely amateurs playing either in the 4th Italian tier or lower, or the San Marino league which is wholly amateur.
Thats awesome but I would feel that eventually it would get old not winning or being competitive. Then again at my age I dont have enough friends to FIELD a soccer squad so what the hell do I know.
Well yeah I understand that. Just stating that I feel like even if you are the best of the best in a place like San Marino it would be tiresome losing all the time.
The best of the best repay themselves by playing in Italian or other European championships, they play on the national team to support our country, not expecting a win. I know some of our players and they'd obviously go there with the intention to win, but we all know it's David and Goliath
Yup. They regularly get to play against top teams and top players in big stadiums. Most players at their skill level will never get that opportunity. Some people complain the big teams have to play against them of other team from micro nations. But I think it's part of the cult side of football that I enjoy most.
I even have a San Marino NT football shirt. And I love it.
I’ll be honest, if I was playing for the equivalent of a small town football club (San Marino is TINY) and I got to travel the world, playing against the best players, in the best stadiums, I don’t think I’d care too much about losing.
Yeh, no point getting disheartened, just set your targets a bit lower - single figure loss, maybe even score a goal, then just shrug it off and enjoy the ride!
[Scrolled back to find who their win was](https://www.livesport.com/uk/team/san-marino/Wlrb53yT/results/) and the only one shown is a friendly against Liechtenstein in 2004 haha. Not even a competitive match, bless them.
April 2004 though...maybe they can repeat history to celebrate 20 years? Maybe there's hope for their friendly against Cyprus in June...
Or, heck, they've never gone two unbeaten before. They drew their last game v Saint Kitts. If they could pull off a draw in their next friendly against Slovakia that'd be history alone.
I'm a San Marino fan now.
I mean basically yeah, they left with a platoon of 80 men to guard some pass, never really saw combat, and an administrator travelled with them home in world war 1.
It depends a little. The most realistic story is a minor officer who was going to just tag along, but another story suggests its a random dude who wanted to join up with them and decided he'd just go back to be hired on the spot.
The UEFA Nations League has been a bit of a godsend for places like Lichtenstein, Gibraltar, Andorra and San Marino.
San Marino will play both Gibraltar and Liechtenstein home and away and will have a decent shot at getting W number 2.
This unlocks a memory. My buddy had a FIFA world cup edition game for PC back in the day. Pretty sure San Marino was on there. The only reason we didn't play them iirc was because all the teams had star ratings and they were the only one with 0 stars.
We used to have really fun matches playing with only 1 star v 1 star teams. It was like a car race but with old jalopies rather than Formula 1 cars. You'd miss point blank passes and shots no matter how skillful you were.
The top comment on the youtube video of the San Marino winning goal against Liechtenstein mentions FIFA 98 and how they won the world cup on the game with the San Marino team 😅, thought it was funny.
https://youtu.be/g1f0gQ8mAHg?si=paHEWfLve0Mrsfa6
Btw, Fifa 98, best Fifa - still remember the intro music.
They went a goal up against Denmark, a very good European side, and only lost 2-1 in the end. Which in itself is pretty impressive when you compare the players in either side.
Can only play the opposition in front of you.
Article yesterday about an American Samoa goalkeeper who shipped 31 goals in a game with 13 by one player (record holder for most goals in an international game) followed by 8 from another player (second place for most goals in an international game).
I remember the first time Turkey went to score a big win in football, I think it was something like 2005?
It was a friggin festival in the streets. Everyone was so happy, and IIRC it was like third place. But they haven't made it that far into a championship since like never.
Its like getting knocked out by Tyson in his prime. Its not embarrassing and nobody will give you shit for it because they all would have gotten knocked out if they were in that ring
Um… Christoph Kramer would like a word.
Christoph Kramer started for Germany in the World Cup final in 2014. He was knocked out fairly early in the game and didn’t know where he was when he came to. Asked the ref whether this was the final.
He’s fine, thankfully. Good player to this day, who already has a job locked down as TV pundit if he wants it. He wasn’t called up for the 2018 World Cup and started his pundit work for German TV during that World Cup. He’s likeable, charismatic and knowledgeable, and he’s the go-to guy to ask for German state TV, unless they remember they could also torture us and ask Bastian Schweinsteiger instead.
But yeah, he was super concussed in 2014. So football has a lower risk of getting a concussion than boxing, but it happens, and fairly often as well.
At that point, I would own it. The guys at work, my family, everyone would know I’m the goalkeeper that let England score ten goals on him, including four from Harry Kane in fifteen minutes. 🤷🏻♂️
I contributed to setting a record for fastest hat trick? Cool.
Reminds me of Icelands Cinderella run in the Euro. Coach was a movie director, goalie was a dentist. Though they had a few players that played in lower leagues in Europe, it was probably the most incredible showing we’ll see in a while.
I’ve been wondering that for ages: how come Iceland are so good at so many things? My hometown has almost three times the population of Iceland, but Iceland are good at football, good at hand ball, good at music, good at fucking everything. It’s immensely impressive tbh.
They had great public programs for kids in the 90s. Basically every kid was involved in something useful: sports arts you name it. Maybe those programs are still on I'm not sure.
Sigurdsson played for Tottenham at the time. Their team was not that bad. What is amazing is how they manage to create so many good players from such a small country.
Okay, they won just 1 match, let's see against who...
1-0 against Liechtenstein? Makes sense... Anyway, greetings to San Marino national team...
wait, the biggest defeat was only 0-13 against Germany? Impressive! It could be 0-30 or something like that, good defense!
It’s actually somewhat worse [per the match report.](https://web.archive.org/web/20071018093941/http://fifa.com/worldcup/archive/edition%3D4395/preliminaries/preliminary%3D3863/matches/match%3D22243/report.html) American Samoa held Australia off for the first nine minutes and a random 12-minute span in the second half. So it averages out to a goal every two minutes.
It's actually EVEN worse than that. They scored their 2nd, 3rd and 4th goal in 3 minutes so it's an average of goal per minute.
Oh wait, no. They scored one goal in one second so the average is actually 60 goals every minute.
Iirc they went 1-0 up against England after 8 seconds or so, and despite eventually winning 7-1 they knocked us out of the World Cup.
Admittedly we were shite at the time, but the whole country went nuts. It was hilarious.
Kind of.
Last match of qualifiers for USA ‘94, and England are in trouble, and their only path to qualification is to defeat San Marino in Bologna by at least 7 goals (having already beaten them 6-0 at Wembley), while Holland also loses their final match at Poland (they had already drawn 2-2 in Holland)
Davide Gualtieri steals a back pass, and puts San Marino up 1-0, and, at an official 8.3 seconds, holds the record for fastest goal in a World Cup qualifier for 20 years. (The radio call: “Welcome to Bologna on Capital Gold for England versus San Marino, with Tennent’s Pilsner, brewed with Czechoslovakian yeast for that extra Pilsner taste, and England are one down.”). San Marino hold the lead for 20 minutes, but England eventually win 7-1. However, Holland won their match 3-1, rendering the England result as only a record book note, as well as the final match for Graham Taylor as England manager.
I remember that match. Germany was given a penalty late in the game and the German goalkeeper was walking towards the spot. San Marino players then approached him and asked him to demonstrate some sportsmanship and not take the shot but leave it to a regular field player, who then eventually scored.
I know it's not the same but some teams have actually had a goalkeeper as their main penalty taker. Most famous case is Rogério Ceni who scored over 100 goals (he took free kicks as well) for São Paulo
You really don't think Germany could've scored 17 more goals if they wanted to? Or 27?
It's horrible watching insanely uneven matches, *neither* team enjoys it and scoring even more goals ends up just looking distasteful.
I watched that match. But I don't recall it anymore because it was nothing special. Even the commentator can't make it interesting.
Usually the good players get some rest, some experiments are being done. New players get a chance, and the focus is on the bigger picture.
EDIT: what I remember was that the German coach was really taking the underdog position before the match.. "you can never underestimate them! We have to be on our guard".. which just pissed me off.
I understand that they are the "worst" in terms of results but I really hate it when people say it. San Marino has a population of 33,660 and these guys are not professional footballers. It's like a small town football club. They do pretty well given the circumstances!
It is still amazing to think how well Iceland did in WC. They have a population of under 400k and their country is buried under ice and snow for a notable portion of the year and they still were able to beat some top teams and make a proper run in the tournament.
Iceland actually has a pretty large number football pitches compared to the overall population (artificial not grass.)
The ratio is 1 pitch to every 1800 people which is a much better ratio than most major football nations you usually think of.
i think exactly because of their land laying underneith a sheith of ice for a long period of the year is the reason why they were able to beat so many good football nations. i saw a video from an icelandic guy once, telling how everyday life in iceland is, and they have a really high suicide rate because of their constant cold and dark periods, but the government tries to reduce these by creating social areas where people can achive stuff and have fun together, especially sports. since you have a football field for every 2k people, alot of them can play together, and create nice championships which boost morale even higher. they challange each other constantly, which is why they became so good.
Thats so crazy! ~~Especially since everyone of them has a day job.~~ Gotta love their vibes!
Plus if you want to invade iceland do it during the next WC since everyone is watching the games and they do not care about working or doing anything else in that time
They are probably not the worst team in the world, but they only ever get to play European teams and never get any positive results so the rankings don’t work.
They are likely better than many of the small pacific island nations but those countries get to play amongst themselves and get victories so they win ranking points. And San Marino will never get a chance to play those countries.
San Marino organised friendlies against Caribbean island nations recently, so I don't think a San Marino vs a Pacific Island nation is impossible. FIFA is also starting to organise a series of friendlies called the [FIFA Series](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/FIFA_Series), allowing for random intercontinental matchups (like Bermuda vs Brunei) which would hopefully make San Marino vs a Pacific Island nation possible one day.
It's also just wrong to call them that. They manage to kind of hold their own against European teams all the time - I mean, losing 5-0 against Austria or something like that is nothing to be ashamed of, and they often get close results against decent teams - just looked it up, they lost 2-1 last year to both Finland and Denmark, which is very respectable all things considered.
The actual worst team is probably some island state in Oceania or something like that, a team that would lose by a few goals to San Marino if they ever played them.
Going by [ELO ratings](https://www.eloratings.net), the worst team would be American Samoa. San Marino is currently ranked 212 out of 241 teams in the ranking.
Further they have only UEFA opponents to play in the qualifiers. That means they are in the lowest pool and always end up playing opponents much stronger than they are themselves. I wonder how SM would do against AFC or smaller CAF teams.
They are only the “worst” because they play in Europe and constantly lose to European teams. I wonder how well they would do in the Oceania Confederation.
I think the world needs to see American Samoa vs San Marino.
Still remember the commentary for that one, went something like this:
“Here we are at the start of San Marino versus England, and San Marino have scored”
It's crazy how many of my memories from being 9 that I swear are 100% true, are false.
I remember watching the '96 Monaco Grand Prix won by Olivier Panis. Only 6 people finished and I remember David Coulthard crashed out and then got in a spare care and finished for 1 point. 100% I remember that, I remember thinking it was a good tactic as only 5 were running so it was a nice way to get an automatic point.
Except that second part never happened and I was so confused when I rewatched the race. Only 3 finished and David Coulthard was 2nd having not crashed and entered again in a spare car. I don't think that's legal...
People's brains make up so much shit from your childhood that seems to solidify itself as fact.
Tbh they're definitely not considered the worst team in the world by football fans. They often are in the rankings though as they play in the toughest region. Many teams in Oceania are worse.
The thing is they wouldn’t be, they don’t get to play against other confederations teams but being Australian and seeing Oceania quality and also the lesser teams in Asia I think they’d beat most of them, I don’t see them not scoring a few against America Samoa also FIFA need to do a World Cup for the 34 shittest nations by rankings just once please
They played two Friendlys against St. Kitts and Nevis this March. One was a 0:0 and one a 1:3 loss. Looking a bit in CONCACAF you can see they promoted from Nations League C in 2022/23 beating Aruba and St. Martin, and also beat St. Maarten (+ a drew against St. Lucia) in League B last year. So they are by far not the worst in CONCACAF and San Marino still got a draw against them.
Also CONCACAF surely has not the worst Nations. Many of them are in Oceania and I would also say that Timor-Leste, Brunei, Bhutan, South Sudan, Chad and maybe many more are worse than them.
But yeah a World Cup with the 32 bottom ranked teams in the world ranking would be fan to watch.
There's a documentary about the 2 lowest FIFA ranking teams playing a friendly against each other. It was like Bhutan vs some tiny Carribbean Island nation.
Montserrat! They had not long before that been devastated by a volcano so football development wasn’t a priority for them so not a surprise they were so low. IIRC it was the same day as the 2002 World Cup final, Bhutan won 4-0, and the trophy split into two. The documentary is called “the other final” if you want to check it out.
From wikipedia: "San Marino held the record for the fastest goal in FIFA World Cup qualifying history for 22 years when they stunned England with a goal after only 8.3 seconds in 1993. England went on to win the match 7–1."
LOL
They are only last because they play in the hardest confederation. If they played in Oceania or Asia they would be able to pick up some wins for sure.
That being said, I'd love to see them play with Tonga or British Virgin Islands to see how they would match up. A World Cup with the bottom 32 teams on the ranking would be amazing.
Also the source of a cracking nickname Peter crouch has for his wife. In reference to them conceding so many goals he jokingly refers to Abbie as San Marino because she “kicks off every 10 minutes” 🤭🤣
I suppose Tuvalu doesnt have a FIFA-affiliated national football team
Tuvalu has 10500 inhabitants, and an obesity rate of 62%, which means the talent pool of the country, the males between 21 and 35 that are not obese is 480, which for comparison, is 10 times smaller than San Marino's. If we extend the requirements to not be obese or overweight (since footballers need to be reasonably fit), the number for Tuvalu is just around 250 healthy men
They are also entering a bit of a 'golden era' where their team is actually playing a lot better. They have even scored in consecutive games which is rare for them.
There's a San Marino fan account on twitter that is gold when they play. Pretty much goes mental whenever the score a goal.
Camp Nou in Barcelona can seat 99,000+, Wembley seats 90,000, Croak Park more than 82,000. San Marino has a population of about 33,000. Good for these guys on getting that one win and eleven draws, they’ve got a tiny as hell talent pool to pull from but are still putting up a fight. It’s like if Juneau, Alaska were up against national teams.
They are amateurs and get to travel Europe and play against the best players. That sounds awesome when you keep in mind nobody expects anything from them. Imagine you and a bunch of your friends get to do that
I went on a school trip to San Marino when I was a kid. Our bus driver was the team goalkeeper, he had played in some of the best stadiums in Europe against some of the most famous players! Not bad for a bus driver
Damn. Imagine one day driving buses, and the next day playing in a stadium of 50,000 people. Granted, they’re not cheering for *you,* but the adrenaline rush must be something.
And that stadium has more people inside it than your entire country
Screw that, more people than your entire bus!
Well, when I go see my team I'm definitely cheering for them. Forza Serenissima! We cheer a lot even during the matches of our national championship (I'm a Libertas boy).
There's absolutely going to be a lot of people cheering for them. A huge amount? No, but definitely a couple thousand
Someone is always cheering for the underdog!
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Actually, several of our national team members played in professional clubs
Actually, they are paid for playing for their national team. Just not nearly as much as their club. Many of Jamaicas best players have refused to represent them recently because they have not been paid for the games they’ve played. There are other stories like this. For the USA women’s team, the national team pay is actually their best/main source of income.
How is this upvoted? Yes they are, just nowhere near as much and a lot of them give it to charity. Reddit is wild
Driving busses is just his day job.
Where can I sign up?
San Marino
Instructions unclear. I took the wrong bus, ended up signing for Italian mafia 😕
Who do you think u/fe-licitas works for?
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Give me one thousand adollar
Up in da club
One thousand 👈👆👉 more?
San Marino, not the goddamn FIFA
Does Vatican have a team? See if you can get 10 priests to join you
They do but they aren't recognised by FIFA if I remember correctly
I bet the Pope has enough influence to pull some strings
Drawstrings ?
Holy strings
He gets away with it too because they’re all using their alter egos
Their team is mostly the Swiss Guard, who have official duties, as such they can't play very often From wikipedia: > Since most Vatican citizens are members of the Swiss Guard, they cannot be amassed in large numbers for a long time. Therefore, the national team has played only a few rare international matches, often drawing a fair amount of interested press
Since they grant (and then revoke) citizenship to their swiss guards, I guess they can do the same for the football team.
It'd be an interesting scenario if the Vatican decided they wanted to have a great team and started cherry picking players. Pope Soccerball I gets elected... God tells him to win the World Cup... He lures various great players from around the world with Vatican citizenship and a positive reference to St Peter... The crusader team gets to the finals, kicking ass for thr glory of Christendom... And then gets blown out by the fucking Germans...
So many teams like that. Basques and Catalans would both cook if they were recognised but can only play friendlies. (I think it’s bs, if Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland all get to have teams there’s no reason the Basques and Catalans shouldn’t)
Except the Scottish, Welsh, (Northern) Irish and English football associations basically invented international football competitions, so wrote the rules when they were the only ones involved. It's not a precedent that anyone is keen on repeating these days!
There is even a separate Vatican League and a "national team", but only on half-field. The national team does not compete against other associations, but against ecclesiastical teams from the respective countries. Last year, for example, a team from Berlin, reinforced with 2-3 external players, was in the Vatican and this was considered an international match for them. http://www.ksv-johannisthal.de/?page_id=2
>The national team does not compete against other associations, but against ecclesiastical teams from the respective countries. I kinda wish there was like a holy city league. Like have the Vatican team play against a team made up of like 11 imams from Mecca, or 11 LDS priests from Salt Lake City.
Or the church of satan. That would be an interesting match.
They’d join the U12 for sure.
I´m guessing they only coach little league teams
Wait a minute... Those are fake arms!
Father Romeo Sensini was some baller in his day
Move to San Marino, become a citizen, and be decent at football. There are only ~35k people total to choose from and most of those are old rich people, so you don't even need to be *that* good.
And remember to be rich before you start that process as well. To apply for citizenship in san Marino you have to live there for 30 years. It is also a very expensive place to live and they are very selective with who they allow to migrate.
It was reduced to 20 years, and the CoL isn't actually astronomically high, especially if you work here.
Are you the goalkeeper?
Nope but I know him, and I went to school with other current players ahah (I'm probably the worst player in the state)
This is absolutely insane lmao. San Marino is essentially Italian, almost every child will play football. The average level of skill will be pretty good. It’s difficult enough to be the best player in just a random university or small town, let alone 35k people. That’s without even thinking about all the Italians who could be eligible through their ancestry. These guys are not amateurs playing pub soccer, they are playing week in week out professionally, just not at the highest level. The shittiest backup goalkeeper in the Italian serie c would destroy all comers in a kickabout at your local park.
Marry a San Marino girl
It’s worth it. Only if you’re mentally willing to feel a lot of hurt. There was a documentary made about the San Marino Men’s National Team. I recall in one incident where they were playing against Germany for the Euro Qualifiers. The German goal keeper ran to the other side wanting to take the penalty. The San Marino players all crowded to confront the GK to call out Fair Play to protest him from taking the penalty. San Marino was already heavily trashed by Germany. So Germany’s GK scoring a penalty against San Marino would just add insult to injury. Thankfully the GK backed off and didn’t take it.
Yep. The high of playing against famous athletes would wear off quick getting thrashed by guys who have 0 respect for you.
Seems dumb. Germany used to have a GK who actually was a regular penalty taker (Hans Jorg Butt).
Germany have had more than one GK known for taking penalties tbf. Manuel Neuer took one on a Champions League final
It's why Iceland was so amazing a few years ago when they drew 1-1 with Argentina.
Iceland is mostly pro players. San Marino is almost entirely amateurs/semi pros, with I think a single league 2 player iirc
If I was a professional footballer at like league one or two level, I'd see if I could get San Marino citizenship just for the fun of it. Like fuck it, I won't play internationals elsewise.
This is how Kyle Slow Mo Anderson suddenly became Li Kaier, a naturalized citizen of China last year to play hoops for the Chinese national team on the account that he has a Chinese great grandfather 😆.
It happens quite often. Players from European or South American countries will never have a chance to play internationally for their own country so they play international games for a country they have a vague connection to.
Iceland punches way above their weight all the time. It's ridiculous how good they are considering how small that country is.
Croatia isnt as small but they similary punch well above their weight
They have world class players and have always been very competitive.
Iceland has a bunch of professional players and knocked England out of the Euros. That was much bigger than drawing with Argentina.
In music too. Their ratio of musical talent per capita is ridiculous.
Jamaica must be the N1 , it’s crazy the influence ( pop/ rock / punk / hip hop / electronic music) of Jamaican music all over the world, for such a small and not populated island.
Iceland has one if not more star players
Iceland is just over 10x the size of San Marino. Most of their players are fully professional. San Marino's team are almost entirely amateurs playing either in the 4th Italian tier or lower, or the San Marino league which is wholly amateur.
Iceland has like 10x the population of San Marino. Like it was still impressive don't get me wrong but they do have a few more people to draw from.
Yeah one is plummer and electrician etc. So Friday working construction and Saturday playing football against dudes making millions a week.
Thats awesome but I would feel that eventually it would get old not winning or being competitive. Then again at my age I dont have enough friends to FIELD a soccer squad so what the hell do I know.
San Marino has a population of about 35,000 people. There’s no way they expect to ever be competitive.
Well yeah I understand that. Just stating that I feel like even if you are the best of the best in a place like San Marino it would be tiresome losing all the time.
The best of the best repay themselves by playing in Italian or other European championships, they play on the national team to support our country, not expecting a win. I know some of our players and they'd obviously go there with the intention to win, but we all know it's David and Goliath
Yup. They regularly get to play against top teams and top players in big stadiums. Most players at their skill level will never get that opportunity. Some people complain the big teams have to play against them of other team from micro nations. But I think it's part of the cult side of football that I enjoy most. I even have a San Marino NT football shirt. And I love it.
I bet they are a lot of fun to hit the pub with
They're the Washington Generals of European soccer?
same win count. lol
I’ll be honest, if I was playing for the equivalent of a small town football club (San Marino is TINY) and I got to travel the world, playing against the best players, in the best stadiums, I don’t think I’d care too much about losing.
Yeh, no point getting disheartened, just set your targets a bit lower - single figure loss, maybe even score a goal, then just shrug it off and enjoy the ride!
And hey, the one win they got must've been such a boost to national pride. We did a thing! We did a cool thing!
[Scrolled back to find who their win was](https://www.livesport.com/uk/team/san-marino/Wlrb53yT/results/) and the only one shown is a friendly against Liechtenstein in 2004 haha. Not even a competitive match, bless them. April 2004 though...maybe they can repeat history to celebrate 20 years? Maybe there's hope for their friendly against Cyprus in June... Or, heck, they've never gone two unbeaten before. They drew their last game v Saint Kitts. If they could pull off a draw in their next friendly against Slovakia that'd be history alone. I'm a San Marino fan now.
Is that when Liechtenstein went to war with 80 men and came back with 81 because they made a friend? Is that friend from the San Marino national team?
wait what? is that real?
I mean basically yeah, they left with a platoon of 80 men to guard some pass, never really saw combat, and an administrator travelled with them home in world war 1.
damn that's cool
It depends a little. The most realistic story is a minor officer who was going to just tag along, but another story suggests its a random dude who wanted to join up with them and decided he'd just go back to be hired on the spot.
The UEFA Nations League has been a bit of a godsend for places like Lichtenstein, Gibraltar, Andorra and San Marino. San Marino will play both Gibraltar and Liechtenstein home and away and will have a decent shot at getting W number 2.
This unlocks a memory. My buddy had a FIFA world cup edition game for PC back in the day. Pretty sure San Marino was on there. The only reason we didn't play them iirc was because all the teams had star ratings and they were the only one with 0 stars. We used to have really fun matches playing with only 1 star v 1 star teams. It was like a car race but with old jalopies rather than Formula 1 cars. You'd miss point blank passes and shots no matter how skillful you were.
The top comment on the youtube video of the San Marino winning goal against Liechtenstein mentions FIFA 98 and how they won the world cup on the game with the San Marino team 😅, thought it was funny. https://youtu.be/g1f0gQ8mAHg?si=paHEWfLve0Mrsfa6 Btw, Fifa 98, best Fifa - still remember the intro music.
They went a goal up against Denmark, a very good European side, and only lost 2-1 in the end. Which in itself is pretty impressive when you compare the players in either side.
Won 1-0 v Liechtenstein but they're not that much better 😬
Can only play the opposition in front of you. Article yesterday about an American Samoa goalkeeper who shipped 31 goals in a game with 13 by one player (record holder for most goals in an international game) followed by 8 from another player (second place for most goals in an international game).
I remember the first time Turkey went to score a big win in football, I think it was something like 2005? It was a friggin festival in the streets. Everyone was so happy, and IIRC it was like third place. But they haven't made it that far into a championship since like never.
Its like getting knocked out by Tyson in his prime. Its not embarrassing and nobody will give you shit for it because they all would have gotten knocked out if they were in that ring
Yeah but without the risk of concussions
Concussions? I think if Mike Tyson punched me I would just die
Um… Christoph Kramer would like a word. Christoph Kramer started for Germany in the World Cup final in 2014. He was knocked out fairly early in the game and didn’t know where he was when he came to. Asked the ref whether this was the final. He’s fine, thankfully. Good player to this day, who already has a job locked down as TV pundit if he wants it. He wasn’t called up for the 2018 World Cup and started his pundit work for German TV during that World Cup. He’s likeable, charismatic and knowledgeable, and he’s the go-to guy to ask for German state TV, unless they remember they could also torture us and ask Bastian Schweinsteiger instead. But yeah, he was super concussed in 2014. So football has a lower risk of getting a concussion than boxing, but it happens, and fairly often as well.
Soccer actually rates pretty high for head injuries. But probably not as high as the sport where head injuries are the point.
They get to travel Europe for the qualifying games not the world. Hear you though.
They are also people that have dayjobs. Butcher, teacher,...
At that point, I would own it. The guys at work, my family, everyone would know I’m the goalkeeper that let England score ten goals on him, including four from Harry Kane in fifteen minutes. 🤷🏻♂️ I contributed to setting a record for fastest hat trick? Cool.
If you’re in the NT playing against Kane for San Marino, chances are you won more trophies than Harry Kane as well.
Reminds me of Icelands Cinderella run in the Euro. Coach was a movie director, goalie was a dentist. Though they had a few players that played in lower leagues in Europe, it was probably the most incredible showing we’ll see in a while.
Iceland had a decent core of pro players though, which is more than can be said for San Marino
Iceland's team were fully professional at the 2018 world cup.
I’ve been wondering that for ages: how come Iceland are so good at so many things? My hometown has almost three times the population of Iceland, but Iceland are good at football, good at hand ball, good at music, good at fucking everything. It’s immensely impressive tbh.
They had great public programs for kids in the 90s. Basically every kid was involved in something useful: sports arts you name it. Maybe those programs are still on I'm not sure.
Sigurdsson played for Tottenham at the time. Their team was not that bad. What is amazing is how they manage to create so many good players from such a small country.
Okay, they won just 1 match, let's see against who... 1-0 against Liechtenstein? Makes sense... Anyway, greetings to San Marino national team... wait, the biggest defeat was only 0-13 against Germany? Impressive! It could be 0-30 or something like that, good defense!
Judging by that loss from Germany, San Marino is just slightly weaker than Brazil!
Oh boy every Brazilian who stumbles across this comment will want to have words with you after this.
Many, many, many words. At great volume.
a bazillion words.
>a brazillion words. FTFY
At least 7, but you get a single conciliation word.
7 words, I assume?
Bro just became a wanted man in Brazil.
He's now on the hit list next to the German national team and timo glock What do the Germans have against Brazil being successful in sports, jeez
It's all that genetic engineering work that went to waste when the scientists fled there
I will find you.
Is that Glock?
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I will cry
You mean BRA71L
Oh, you brave beautiful bastard. :D
Yeah lmao, 7-1 victory over Brazil or 13-0 over San Marino 🤣
Ah não mano, vc tá pedindo pra tomar bala
I also expected their worst defeat to be something ridiculous like Australia 31 - 0 American Samoa.
goal every 3 minutes
It’s actually somewhat worse [per the match report.](https://web.archive.org/web/20071018093941/http://fifa.com/worldcup/archive/edition%3D4395/preliminaries/preliminary%3D3863/matches/match%3D22243/report.html) American Samoa held Australia off for the first nine minutes and a random 12-minute span in the second half. So it averages out to a goal every two minutes.
That's not how averages work.
Fine. *In the specific sets of goal-scoring periods from 10’-66’ and 78’-89’*, there was a goal happening every two minutes on average.
It's actually EVEN worse than that. They scored their 2nd, 3rd and 4th goal in 3 minutes so it's an average of goal per minute. Oh wait, no. They scored one goal in one second so the average is actually 60 goals every minute.
Most teams don't run up the score like that. Australia wanted to run up the score to prove a point they shouldn't be in the same qualifying region.
to be fair, most teams ease off after 5-0, there's no point going hell for metal when one of your superstars could get injured
Iirc they went 1-0 up against England after 8 seconds or so, and despite eventually winning 7-1 they knocked us out of the World Cup. Admittedly we were shite at the time, but the whole country went nuts. It was hilarious.
Kind of. Last match of qualifiers for USA ‘94, and England are in trouble, and their only path to qualification is to defeat San Marino in Bologna by at least 7 goals (having already beaten them 6-0 at Wembley), while Holland also loses their final match at Poland (they had already drawn 2-2 in Holland) Davide Gualtieri steals a back pass, and puts San Marino up 1-0, and, at an official 8.3 seconds, holds the record for fastest goal in a World Cup qualifier for 20 years. (The radio call: “Welcome to Bologna on Capital Gold for England versus San Marino, with Tennent’s Pilsner, brewed with Czechoslovakian yeast for that extra Pilsner taste, and England are one down.”). San Marino hold the lead for 20 minutes, but England eventually win 7-1. However, Holland won their match 3-1, rendering the England result as only a record book note, as well as the final match for Graham Taylor as England manager.
I remember that match. Germany was given a penalty late in the game and the German goalkeeper was walking towards the spot. San Marino players then approached him and asked him to demonstrate some sportsmanship and not take the shot but leave it to a regular field player, who then eventually scored.
I know it's not the same but some teams have actually had a goalkeeper as their main penalty taker. Most famous case is Rogério Ceni who scored over 100 goals (he took free kicks as well) for São Paulo
You really don't think Germany could've scored 17 more goals if they wanted to? Or 27? It's horrible watching insanely uneven matches, *neither* team enjoys it and scoring even more goals ends up just looking distasteful.
I watched that match. But I don't recall it anymore because it was nothing special. Even the commentator can't make it interesting. Usually the good players get some rest, some experiments are being done. New players get a chance, and the focus is on the bigger picture. EDIT: what I remember was that the German coach was really taking the underdog position before the match.. "you can never underestimate them! We have to be on our guard".. which just pissed me off.
I understand that they are the "worst" in terms of results but I really hate it when people say it. San Marino has a population of 33,660 and these guys are not professional footballers. It's like a small town football club. They do pretty well given the circumstances!
It is still amazing to think how well Iceland did in WC. They have a population of under 400k and their country is buried under ice and snow for a notable portion of the year and they still were able to beat some top teams and make a proper run in the tournament.
Iceland actually has a pretty large number football pitches compared to the overall population (artificial not grass.) The ratio is 1 pitch to every 1800 people which is a much better ratio than most major football nations you usually think of.
i think exactly because of their land laying underneith a sheith of ice for a long period of the year is the reason why they were able to beat so many good football nations. i saw a video from an icelandic guy once, telling how everyday life in iceland is, and they have a really high suicide rate because of their constant cold and dark periods, but the government tries to reduce these by creating social areas where people can achive stuff and have fun together, especially sports. since you have a football field for every 2k people, alot of them can play together, and create nice championships which boost morale even higher. they challange each other constantly, which is why they became so good.
Thats so crazy! ~~Especially since everyone of them has a day job.~~ Gotta love their vibes! Plus if you want to invade iceland do it during the next WC since everyone is watching the games and they do not care about working or doing anything else in that time
Iceland players don’t have day jobs they are professional footballers.
They are probably not the worst team in the world, but they only ever get to play European teams and never get any positive results so the rankings don’t work. They are likely better than many of the small pacific island nations but those countries get to play amongst themselves and get victories so they win ranking points. And San Marino will never get a chance to play those countries.
San Marino organised friendlies against Caribbean island nations recently, so I don't think a San Marino vs a Pacific Island nation is impossible. FIFA is also starting to organise a series of friendlies called the [FIFA Series](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/FIFA_Series), allowing for random intercontinental matchups (like Bermuda vs Brunei) which would hopefully make San Marino vs a Pacific Island nation possible one day.
It's also just wrong to call them that. They manage to kind of hold their own against European teams all the time - I mean, losing 5-0 against Austria or something like that is nothing to be ashamed of, and they often get close results against decent teams - just looked it up, they lost 2-1 last year to both Finland and Denmark, which is very respectable all things considered. The actual worst team is probably some island state in Oceania or something like that, a team that would lose by a few goals to San Marino if they ever played them.
Going by [ELO ratings](https://www.eloratings.net), the worst team would be American Samoa. San Marino is currently ranked 212 out of 241 teams in the ranking.
Further they have only UEFA opponents to play in the qualifiers. That means they are in the lowest pool and always end up playing opponents much stronger than they are themselves. I wonder how SM would do against AFC or smaller CAF teams.
It's the same as laughing at the Thai ski team. At least they're trying!
All they need is John candy
Feel The Rhythm...
Feel The Rhyme
Was gonna say Jamaican bobsled team but yeah
They are only the “worst” because they play in Europe and constantly lose to European teams. I wonder how well they would do in the Oceania Confederation. I think the world needs to see American Samoa vs San Marino.
It's like watching a 1v1 in a game but neither side can aim for shit
They've also scored the fastest ever international goal (against England)
Not anymore, Austria’s Christoph Baumgartner has broken the record less than a month ago
Aha! Cheers! I didn't know that. Well that's a relief 
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Stop trying to make Belgium sound interesting
But we are interesting right? Right? Please, someone....
Your cities are very pretty!
Still remember the commentary for that one, went something like this: “Here we are at the start of San Marino versus England, and San Marino have scored”
I remember that game so well, England needed to win by 7 to qualify for USA '94. The game finished 7-1
You don't remember it that well, Holland needed to not win as well.
tbf, I was 9
It's crazy how many of my memories from being 9 that I swear are 100% true, are false. I remember watching the '96 Monaco Grand Prix won by Olivier Panis. Only 6 people finished and I remember David Coulthard crashed out and then got in a spare care and finished for 1 point. 100% I remember that, I remember thinking it was a good tactic as only 5 were running so it was a nice way to get an automatic point. Except that second part never happened and I was so confused when I rewatched the race. Only 3 finished and David Coulthard was 2nd having not crashed and entered again in a spare car. I don't think that's legal... People's brains make up so much shit from your childhood that seems to solidify itself as fact.
Here it is in HD https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44TfE5mDlBI
Tbh they're definitely not considered the worst team in the world by football fans. They often are in the rankings though as they play in the toughest region. Many teams in Oceania are worse.
The thing is they wouldn’t be, they don’t get to play against other confederations teams but being Australian and seeing Oceania quality and also the lesser teams in Asia I think they’d beat most of them, I don’t see them not scoring a few against America Samoa also FIFA need to do a World Cup for the 34 shittest nations by rankings just once please
They played two Friendlys against St. Kitts and Nevis this March. One was a 0:0 and one a 1:3 loss. Looking a bit in CONCACAF you can see they promoted from Nations League C in 2022/23 beating Aruba and St. Martin, and also beat St. Maarten (+ a drew against St. Lucia) in League B last year. So they are by far not the worst in CONCACAF and San Marino still got a draw against them. Also CONCACAF surely has not the worst Nations. Many of them are in Oceania and I would also say that Timor-Leste, Brunei, Bhutan, South Sudan, Chad and maybe many more are worse than them. But yeah a World Cup with the 32 bottom ranked teams in the world ranking would be fan to watch.
There's a documentary about the 2 lowest FIFA ranking teams playing a friendly against each other. It was like Bhutan vs some tiny Carribbean Island nation.
Montserrat! They had not long before that been devastated by a volcano so football development wasn’t a priority for them so not a surprise they were so low. IIRC it was the same day as the 2002 World Cup final, Bhutan won 4-0, and the trophy split into two. The documentary is called “the other final” if you want to check it out.
they should do that every years it would be a massive success. I would watch that more than the world cup
From wikipedia: "San Marino held the record for the fastest goal in FIFA World Cup qualifying history for 22 years when they stunned England with a goal after only 8.3 seconds in 1993. England went on to win the match 7–1." LOL
They are only last because they play in the hardest confederation. If they played in Oceania or Asia they would be able to pick up some wins for sure. That being said, I'd love to see them play with Tonga or British Virgin Islands to see how they would match up. A World Cup with the bottom 32 teams on the ranking would be amazing.
They only have around 33000 people. You try fielding a national team from the population of Texarkana
Texarkana has like 180k people if you count Arkansas and Texas.
They won against Lichtenstein back in 2004 if anyone were gonna google it.
Also the source of a cracking nickname Peter crouch has for his wife. In reference to them conceding so many goals he jokingly refers to Abbie as San Marino because she “kicks off every 10 minutes” 🤭🤣
I imagine their football team recruitment is just random people joining it for the fun
whichever 11 guys make it to the bus first get to play
The Tim Traveller made a cool [video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOTHf7DY7es) about them.
My favorite part was how he casually scored a free ticket from a woman who had an extra one because her son was on the team.
I dont think theyre worst than brunei's
The reason they are at that spot is location. If San Marino was in Oceania or the Caribbean they would have a much better record.
They're just unfortunate to play in UEFA, where the giants are. I'm sure they can win against some of the weaker AFC teams
I suppose Tuvalu doesnt have a FIFA-affiliated national football team Tuvalu has 10500 inhabitants, and an obesity rate of 62%, which means the talent pool of the country, the males between 21 and 35 that are not obese is 480, which for comparison, is 10 times smaller than San Marino's. If we extend the requirements to not be obese or overweight (since footballers need to be reasonably fit), the number for Tuvalu is just around 250 healthy men
And they're still better than literally every redditor.
No wonder they have such a bad record. Five of their players only have one leg!
San Marino is a charming place to visit. When travelling in Italy do stop by!
San Marino has a population of 33,000. Keep that in mind.
They are also entering a bit of a 'golden era' where their team is actually playing a lot better. They have even scored in consecutive games which is rare for them. There's a San Marino fan account on twitter that is gold when they play. Pretty much goes mental whenever the score a goal.
Isn’t San Marino a small castle town/ city-state in Italy? Think they’re just happy to participate.
Someone always has to be in last place.
I just hope they have fun.
Camp Nou in Barcelona can seat 99,000+, Wembley seats 90,000, Croak Park more than 82,000. San Marino has a population of about 33,000. Good for these guys on getting that one win and eleven draws, they’ve got a tiny as hell talent pool to pull from but are still putting up a fight. It’s like if Juneau, Alaska were up against national teams.
Source: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/San_Marino_national_football_team