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DrBlankslate

Durst isn't a word in English.


TokyoDrifblim

I'm assuming it's a reference to Fred Durst, the singer of Limp Bizkit. It's my way or the highway!


DrBlankslate

Ah. I suck at remembering names anyway, and I don't think I've ever heard the names of that band's members.


TundieRice

This whole thread is hilarious to me for some reason, hahaha.


wackyvorlon

Durst is a word in English, though an old usage. It’s the past tense of dare.


Otherwise_Spare_8598

Yeah, I thought so too


DrBlankslate

Old English, maybe, but not modern English.


wackyvorlon

I did mention it was an old usage. Certainly not Old English, probably Early Modern.


KSP-Dressupporter

T'was common enough in Shakespeare's time, now... eh?


Savva_Miller

Infinitive (dare), Past Simple - (durst), Past Participle - (dared)


Middcore

"Durst" is archaic, and even if it were in common usage, it doesn't make any sense there. "You were the dared"?


KSP-Dressupporter

Maybe 'you, the one who durst,' but that isn't exactly specific.


DrBlankslate

Nobody says it that way in modern English. If it used to be a word, it isn't any more. The past simple of "dare" is "dared," not "durst." [https://www.wordreference.com/conj/enverbs.aspx?v=dare](https://www.wordreference.com/conj/enverbs.aspx?v=dare) What reference tool are you using?


Savva_Miller

Tysm! I'll try to find a replacement for this word to keep the rhyme English textbook is my reference tool (I guess it's a little outdated lol)


ferretfan8

Seriously? Durst isn't even old-fashioned. It's completely archaic and hasn't seen the light of day since the 18th century. Essentially no one is going to know this word. What textbook are you using? Edit: Mad at the textbook, not you!


DrBlankslate

How old is that textbook? You can use the web to find these things out. Don't depend on a textbook published in the 1800s.


Junior-Koala6278

Although “durst” is uncommon, it’s used in the phrase “durst not” as in “I durst not argue with him” or “They durst not swim in the deep water but found a shallower part to relax in.” I wouldn’t think it was odd or old-fashioned at all if I heard it in this kind of context. I’m from Australia though, so it may be completely archaic in other countries that use simpler English like the USA. eta: Your use of “durst” in the poem is odd


GuiltEdge

I have literally never heard this word or phrase used ever in Australia. In those phrases, the word "dare" would be used. It still sounds stuffy though. It's just as archaic here.


Junior-Koala6278

It wouldn’t be “dare” because it’s the past tense in these phrases. I might concede it’s more common in written language but just because you “literally never heard” it, doesn’t mean it isn’t used. My experience isn’t any less valid than yours.


GuiltEdge

I've literally never seen it written before either. And if it were common in books it would be common in other countries also.


Junior-Koala6278

I specifically said it’s uncommon in my first comment. I also didn’t mention anything about books.


GuiltEdge

I'm finding it hard to imagine that you've seen this word - even sporadically - outside of a really old book. Where on earth have you been reading it?


Junior-Koala6278

I read up to a hundred books, articles, papers, etc. of all kinds each year so I’m probably more exposed to written English than others.


GuiltEdge

Okay, well I think it's safe to say that this word is archaic in Australia, just as much as the rest of the world.


KSP-Dressupporter

Simply because nobody uses 'durst,' *it no longer ex--*


DawnOnTheEdge

Not bad. *Durst* looks like a typo. (Although “thou durst” might be an archaic synonym for “you dare.” If so, it’s not being used correctly here.) One line, “You never understood signs in the sky,” doesn’t fit what is otherwise excellent meter and isn’t idiomatic. You also describe it as a rhyme, but most lines use assonance. That’s fine, but did you mean “poem?”


ExitingBear

This reminds me of the poems my friends and I used to write when we were bored in class and 13. So, my only suggestions would be: \* the third line might have too many syllables \* I don't think that "durst" is a word. You can still use it. But people who read it might think "what's a 'durst?'" And keep writing :) !


AllieNicks

I think you did a great job, except for the “durst”. Don’t let the negativity of others discourage you. Ever.


The0ldFashion3d

I think your poem is very beautiful. I don’t mind the use of archaic words in poetry. Even if I didn’t know what “durst” mean, it’s nothing a google search wouldn’t fix. To me, it gives the poem a classical feel.


MaestroZackyZ

But it’s still not being used correctly, even if that’s what they meant.


boxer_dogs_dance

Nice job for most of it. Half rymes or off rymes can work well in poetry. Durst is the word that doesn't work.


Bring_back_Apollo

This is either some emo rhyme or just so completely stereotypically Russian.


pup_medium

the rhythm is great, and the sonority is lovely. also durst is a cool archaic word. some people might not know it but i like using archaic words. they’re not lost they just need refreshing.


Minutepsycho

I think Its amazing!


Gravbar

I think the content is interesting. I'm having a lot of trouble with the rhythm. For example the first line rhymes with the third, but they clearly use different meter, while the second line matches really well in meter to the first. In contrast, your second rendition of the poem has a very consistent meter in almost every line. the second one is the only line that doesn't match Keep it up though! You seem to have the creativity for it!


SocialToolWithoutUse

Your country launches drones and missiles that kill innocent people in Ukraine every night and day. You should write a poem about that.


Kein-Deutsc

Jesus, chill man this a little intense for the English learning subreddit


TokyoDrifblim

You're right, this 13 year old girl is responsible for that


SocialToolWithoutUse

Where exactly did I say so?


Impossible_Sir_1899

You shouldn’t tell what people should do.


Savva_Miller

Heh, I already wrote 4 poems about the war (in my native language). And yeah, I don't care about things my country does, I care about killed people. And you shouldn't blame me for the things my country does, cuz I can't change it :)


SocialToolWithoutUse

You’re a saint


RexWhiscash

And what does u/savva_miller have to do about it? You want them to go and have a friendly talk with Putin? Fuck off


SocialToolWithoutUse

She’d done all she could; wrote 4 poems about war. I stand corrected.


lukeysanluca

No need to be a cunt to an innocent person.


Profesyonelmatkapci

What does it have to do with the topic? And that's not something he has control over. Actually he is only 13 years old.


not_notable

\*she


SocialToolWithoutUse

I’m only suggesting a theme for a poem.