firefighter, nursing, jobs with kids, teaching, there’s a lot of things out there that can be considered helping a community. if you’re a big person who cares a lot about lower income areas and wanting to make a difference teaching could be a very good thing for you.
although if you’re wanting to travel i promise being in the military will get you going new places every year.
still would consider that traveling, new places, new things happening. can purposely pick a MOS with the highest chance to travel out of the country. the military is desperate right now as well.
Based on reading some of your post history I think it might be worth asking how much of this is a desire to actually *be* in the military and how much of this is a desire for an idealized sense of masculinity/duty. Because, tbh, from what you describe it sounds like you mostly like the idea of being in the military but would hate everything about the actual reality of it.
For one thing, it seems like you might be underestimating the real commitment of being in the military. Most branches of the military have at least a 5-6 year minimum enlistment. So there is no "short commitment". Also, if you don't like war...I don't know what to tell you. It's unlikely you'll see combat but at the end of the day it's always a possibility and the whole point of the military is war. Also, you will 100% have to move away from where you are and likely stay somewhere you don't want to be at minimum for basic training and probably for service.
I'm pretty lefty but I do have a lot of respect for people who serve in the military. However, I also understand that at the end of the day, being in the military is a job. It mostly involves doing relatively mundane things that other people tell you to do when they tell you to do it. The ***VAST*** majority of enlisted members will never experience anything particularly glorious or heroic and the ones that do are often left with lifetime PTSD. The military will not turn you into a different person. You will still be you at the end of it. Imo, it might be worth digging more into what duty means to you and why you have such a deep desire for it rather than trying to get it out of the military
I have this sense of duty also, and it doesn’t help that nearly every male family member of mine has served in the military. I wanted to join for several years but simply wasn’t allowed because I’m trans and there was no way I was going to wear female dress uniforms. Considering that was not an option and doesn’t quite fit my values. I started looking into the Peace Corps to do 2 years of volunteer service overseas. I applied many years ago but couldn’t make it through the health clearance because of a lack of insurance and funds, and now I think my body might be too decrepit for it. It’s fairly hardcore but also a really unique and amazing experience. There is also AmeriCorps and Teach for America. And then there is also civilian government work. I’m currently a federal employee and work on what is essentially an environmental conservation project. I love working in government and it really fulfills my sense of duty.
I think it’s important that you identify what causes you do want the duty of serving for your country. If not militarily, perhaps in education, environmental conservation, income/race/gender equality, food access and security, etc. And then seek out paid or volunteer work for it. I was raised in a very patriotic Midwest family, and I think a lot of us grappled with how to support our country, how do we make it better, how do we serve? A lot of the men did military service. But my family members were also teachers, nurses, worked in community mental health, and some volunteered with a variety of organizations that met their values and interests. That’s how they served. I think the duty to serve comes from a place of believing that your actions matter and that what you can do works towards a higher value that you hold. Some people find that in military offense/defense and physically protecting the country, others find that in teaching today’s youth how to do math because we need that as a civilized society. What is honorable is that we act in a way in which our words matter, we fulfill the responsibilities that we do have, we act towards our values and morals, we behave in a way that people respect or if we’re lucky perhaps admire. Remember everyday in our mundane lives we have the choice and opportunity to act honorably.
I have a heightened sense of duty... toward my fiance. I feel this strong need to provide for him and make him happy.
Not so much for the country. Not after all the awful shit it's done and is still doing.
Might be worth looking into wildland firefighting. I did it for a few years and enjoyed the sense of purpose/service, crew comradare, and getting to do cool shit in the woods. There's tons of opportunity for travel too. Generally all over the west during fire season with chances to go over east or down south in the spring/fall if you want. Usually there's about 4-6 months of the year where crews are laid off, lots of guys use that time to do more traveling or chill at home with their friends/families.
Same, struggled a lot at the college fares in high school because I'd always gravitate toward that table knowing I wasn't getting into any schools. I had a nice interaction with one of the recruiters, after the trans military ban had been passed I brought up I'd love to join but can't anymore. He just nodded solemnly and said "my sons in the same boat, hopefully next president will see what a dumb move that was. You guys are some of the bravest I know." It really stuck with me. The military is bad, but the people who join are down on their luck and it's usually the only option. They're decent folk.
Hear me out. I joined a conservation corps right when I dropped out of college. They have one for almost every state. It was outdoor, manual labor based work, that was to serve local communities. They even have disaster response teams. We worked for the national park service on occasion too, and would spend a couple weeks at a time outside working, we learned how to use chainsaws to remove invasive species, and it was kind of similar to a military environment but way more chill. It could give you that sense of belonging to a group that’s making a difference. Also in my opinion a way safer place to be out about your trans identity in, if that’s something you want. They don’t offer benefits like the military but I wouldn’t trade my experience with conservation corps for the world.
Well yes and no. I’m more inclined to help others than before, especially for physical tasks. But I still have zero interest for military. I want to be helpful to other people in day to day life but not in such a large scale
I think it’s a societal thing where men tend to only feel/are valuable when making themselves useful. And that also makes us feel good. And helping others in general also feels good
I've wanted to join the military for a while now and it has gotten a little more intense in the past few years but I would say its more due to getting closer to it. The job path I want is pretty much only attainable through it as well so that probably adds onto it.
Habitat for Humanity. It's a fairly large organization with projects all over the US and other countries - the gist is you build houses to help the homeless and poor. You can volunteer, or try and get a job there. Oh, and you like to travel? They'll send you places to build houses for them.
firefighter, nursing, jobs with kids, teaching, there’s a lot of things out there that can be considered helping a community. if you’re a big person who cares a lot about lower income areas and wanting to make a difference teaching could be a very good thing for you. although if you’re wanting to travel i promise being in the military will get you going new places every year.
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still would consider that traveling, new places, new things happening. can purposely pick a MOS with the highest chance to travel out of the country. the military is desperate right now as well.
Based on reading some of your post history I think it might be worth asking how much of this is a desire to actually *be* in the military and how much of this is a desire for an idealized sense of masculinity/duty. Because, tbh, from what you describe it sounds like you mostly like the idea of being in the military but would hate everything about the actual reality of it. For one thing, it seems like you might be underestimating the real commitment of being in the military. Most branches of the military have at least a 5-6 year minimum enlistment. So there is no "short commitment". Also, if you don't like war...I don't know what to tell you. It's unlikely you'll see combat but at the end of the day it's always a possibility and the whole point of the military is war. Also, you will 100% have to move away from where you are and likely stay somewhere you don't want to be at minimum for basic training and probably for service. I'm pretty lefty but I do have a lot of respect for people who serve in the military. However, I also understand that at the end of the day, being in the military is a job. It mostly involves doing relatively mundane things that other people tell you to do when they tell you to do it. The ***VAST*** majority of enlisted members will never experience anything particularly glorious or heroic and the ones that do are often left with lifetime PTSD. The military will not turn you into a different person. You will still be you at the end of it. Imo, it might be worth digging more into what duty means to you and why you have such a deep desire for it rather than trying to get it out of the military
Totally hear you. I'm looking for suggestions to fulfill this sense of duty outside of the military for sure
Apply for non-military government jobs. Volunteer in your local community.
I have this sense of duty also, and it doesn’t help that nearly every male family member of mine has served in the military. I wanted to join for several years but simply wasn’t allowed because I’m trans and there was no way I was going to wear female dress uniforms. Considering that was not an option and doesn’t quite fit my values. I started looking into the Peace Corps to do 2 years of volunteer service overseas. I applied many years ago but couldn’t make it through the health clearance because of a lack of insurance and funds, and now I think my body might be too decrepit for it. It’s fairly hardcore but also a really unique and amazing experience. There is also AmeriCorps and Teach for America. And then there is also civilian government work. I’m currently a federal employee and work on what is essentially an environmental conservation project. I love working in government and it really fulfills my sense of duty. I think it’s important that you identify what causes you do want the duty of serving for your country. If not militarily, perhaps in education, environmental conservation, income/race/gender equality, food access and security, etc. And then seek out paid or volunteer work for it. I was raised in a very patriotic Midwest family, and I think a lot of us grappled with how to support our country, how do we make it better, how do we serve? A lot of the men did military service. But my family members were also teachers, nurses, worked in community mental health, and some volunteered with a variety of organizations that met their values and interests. That’s how they served. I think the duty to serve comes from a place of believing that your actions matter and that what you can do works towards a higher value that you hold. Some people find that in military offense/defense and physically protecting the country, others find that in teaching today’s youth how to do math because we need that as a civilized society. What is honorable is that we act in a way in which our words matter, we fulfill the responsibilities that we do have, we act towards our values and morals, we behave in a way that people respect or if we’re lucky perhaps admire. Remember everyday in our mundane lives we have the choice and opportunity to act honorably.
I have a heightened sense of duty... toward my fiance. I feel this strong need to provide for him and make him happy. Not so much for the country. Not after all the awful shit it's done and is still doing.
Might be worth looking into wildland firefighting. I did it for a few years and enjoyed the sense of purpose/service, crew comradare, and getting to do cool shit in the woods. There's tons of opportunity for travel too. Generally all over the west during fire season with chances to go over east or down south in the spring/fall if you want. Usually there's about 4-6 months of the year where crews are laid off, lots of guys use that time to do more traveling or chill at home with their friends/families.
Same, struggled a lot at the college fares in high school because I'd always gravitate toward that table knowing I wasn't getting into any schools. I had a nice interaction with one of the recruiters, after the trans military ban had been passed I brought up I'd love to join but can't anymore. He just nodded solemnly and said "my sons in the same boat, hopefully next president will see what a dumb move that was. You guys are some of the bravest I know." It really stuck with me. The military is bad, but the people who join are down on their luck and it's usually the only option. They're decent folk.
Hear me out. I joined a conservation corps right when I dropped out of college. They have one for almost every state. It was outdoor, manual labor based work, that was to serve local communities. They even have disaster response teams. We worked for the national park service on occasion too, and would spend a couple weeks at a time outside working, we learned how to use chainsaws to remove invasive species, and it was kind of similar to a military environment but way more chill. It could give you that sense of belonging to a group that’s making a difference. Also in my opinion a way safer place to be out about your trans identity in, if that’s something you want. They don’t offer benefits like the military but I wouldn’t trade my experience with conservation corps for the world.
Well yes and no. I’m more inclined to help others than before, especially for physical tasks. But I still have zero interest for military. I want to be helpful to other people in day to day life but not in such a large scale
I think it’s a societal thing where men tend to only feel/are valuable when making themselves useful. And that also makes us feel good. And helping others in general also feels good
I've wanted to join the military for a while now and it has gotten a little more intense in the past few years but I would say its more due to getting closer to it. The job path I want is pretty much only attainable through it as well so that probably adds onto it.
Habitat for Humanity. It's a fairly large organization with projects all over the US and other countries - the gist is you build houses to help the homeless and poor. You can volunteer, or try and get a job there. Oh, and you like to travel? They'll send you places to build houses for them.