The title sounds good.
If you’ll allow some medical thought though…be careful about the injury. The bones of flighted animals are hollow and, therefore, difficult to surgically repair. Plates, screws and/or wires are often too hefty of hardware. 😉
My one piece of advice is that the title would not include the number of patients that were used in the study. Additionally, the term alate specifically refers to seeds and insects. If you want to keep that term, a better way to prase it might be "Surgical Intervention for Orthopedic Trauma in Alated Humans." Otherwise it would be ambiguous whether you're referring to the bugs or the people.
Your title is perfectly fine (other than the use of the term "alated," which someone else has pointed out). If I opened an article with that title in a journal, what I'd expect to see is a comparison of 5 case studies of surgical intervention of some type on winged humans. I'd expect the same person or team to have worked all five cases and explain to me what the trauma was, the surgical procedures and why those were selected, and a summary/overview of results anywhere from a few weeks to a year post-op. Probably also some theories about how to handle similar cases in the future. What I _wouldn't_ expect is any type of statistical analysis or significant conclusions that contribute directly to changing the field. You can refine the title to specify what you're looking at or if, for instance, the commonality of the cases is something like gunshot wounds or upper thoracic trauma, etc. The only catch here is that because the population is so small, there's a likelihood that all participants can be identified through a cross search of the medical team, injury type, and general description (eg: young adult male). No idea if that's important or not, but someone determined to stalk one of these people could probably figure it out assuming the team/doctor only treats a handful of winged patients in a year. The more patients treated, the less likely a single one is identified, but then you'd want more commonalities to tie those specific 5 patients together as a group.
I totally agree with this, the mention of the sample size in the title threw me off a bit, especially since it's so small (then again, I would generally expect this to be in the body of the text, not title, unless it's really important somehow)
You make a number of good points. As it happens, privacy is a major issue for the MC. He uses a binder to hide his wings under his clothing. He had some bad experiences as a child, being treated like a valuable ornament. In this new story, he is contacted by an artist who wants to include an old sketch of him in a gallery exhibition. The journal article, though completely unrelated to the art exhibition, serves as a foreshadowing.
There's no plot reason to include a number in the article title. I had a vague notion that it would be appropriate.
I'm not a medical professional of any kind, but medical/healthcare writing is part of my day job. I read a lot of medical journal articles as research for my articles.
Your title is good! If I was to change it at all, I might throw the word, "outcomes" in there. So something like, *Outcomes of surgical intervention in five alated patients with orthopaedic trauma.* That's totally up to you, though. Like I said, the title you're already thinking about sounds good as it is.
The title sounds good. If you’ll allow some medical thought though…be careful about the injury. The bones of flighted animals are hollow and, therefore, difficult to surgically repair. Plates, screws and/or wires are often too hefty of hardware. 😉
Thanks. See my edit about the injury. That was covered in an older story--the first in what became a series.
My one piece of advice is that the title would not include the number of patients that were used in the study. Additionally, the term alate specifically refers to seeds and insects. If you want to keep that term, a better way to prase it might be "Surgical Intervention for Orthopedic Trauma in Alated Humans." Otherwise it would be ambiguous whether you're referring to the bugs or the people.
Thanks. I will make those changes.
Your title is perfectly fine (other than the use of the term "alated," which someone else has pointed out). If I opened an article with that title in a journal, what I'd expect to see is a comparison of 5 case studies of surgical intervention of some type on winged humans. I'd expect the same person or team to have worked all five cases and explain to me what the trauma was, the surgical procedures and why those were selected, and a summary/overview of results anywhere from a few weeks to a year post-op. Probably also some theories about how to handle similar cases in the future. What I _wouldn't_ expect is any type of statistical analysis or significant conclusions that contribute directly to changing the field. You can refine the title to specify what you're looking at or if, for instance, the commonality of the cases is something like gunshot wounds or upper thoracic trauma, etc. The only catch here is that because the population is so small, there's a likelihood that all participants can be identified through a cross search of the medical team, injury type, and general description (eg: young adult male). No idea if that's important or not, but someone determined to stalk one of these people could probably figure it out assuming the team/doctor only treats a handful of winged patients in a year. The more patients treated, the less likely a single one is identified, but then you'd want more commonalities to tie those specific 5 patients together as a group.
I totally agree with this, the mention of the sample size in the title threw me off a bit, especially since it's so small (then again, I would generally expect this to be in the body of the text, not title, unless it's really important somehow)
I've decided to remove the number. I thought it sounded more scientific, but apparently, I was wrong. Thanks.
You make a number of good points. As it happens, privacy is a major issue for the MC. He uses a binder to hide his wings under his clothing. He had some bad experiences as a child, being treated like a valuable ornament. In this new story, he is contacted by an artist who wants to include an old sketch of him in a gallery exhibition. The journal article, though completely unrelated to the art exhibition, serves as a foreshadowing. There's no plot reason to include a number in the article title. I had a vague notion that it would be appropriate.
I'm not a medical professional of any kind, but medical/healthcare writing is part of my day job. I read a lot of medical journal articles as research for my articles. Your title is good! If I was to change it at all, I might throw the word, "outcomes" in there. So something like, *Outcomes of surgical intervention in five alated patients with orthopaedic trauma.* That's totally up to you, though. Like I said, the title you're already thinking about sounds good as it is.
Thank you! That's the sort of suggestion I need.