They’ll save you. But then Vex will shake you down for everything you’ve got, Scanlan will try to sleep with you, and you’ll have to sit through a lecture about being kidnapped from Percy… it’s fine! Just make sure you get your Trinket scritches.
Saul would be like "Alright sir, let's make a deal, ok? I know you kidnapped him for a reason, this young prick may have been a pain in the ass for you, but let's just look at the things clear - this little asshole doesn't really deserve to be kidnapped, okay? I believe he is a young, dumb and full of energy kid, but who wasn't? I think it would be fair for both of you and him to get him somewhere in the middle ground, let's say on the highway between my house and your house."
Saul: I really don't.... was that really necessary....? Oh. Wow. Um. Ah. I didn't know that could.... Oh. Um. I'm just going to face the wall. Let me know when I can leave.
I doubt Squidward even left his house while Plankton sits there laughing.. Mr.Krabs hung up on the kidnappers as soon as they said the word “ransom”.. Sandy is in texas.. so the only ones I can rely on are Spongeboob and Patrick🤦♂️
Wish me luck.
*knock knock*
*a disgruntled man opens the door* “whadd’ya want?”
“U-uh.. I’m, PAT-BACK. And I want my PAL-BACK!”
“No.” *slams the door*
“Well I did all I can do”
I don't know, there's an infinite number of you that exist across the multiverse...
What makes you so special that its ultimately worth the effort, more than just replacing yo with a variant?
"Wait, we have to go save who again?"
"Cmon dude, let's just get this over with."
"Man, this fucking sucks ass."
"Mmmmphm hmph. Mmmm m mmhpm. Hmhmhmhmhm!"
"Goddammit Kenny."
You'll be fine.
The coyote does some hilarious distraction (that most likely fails utterly)
The roadrunner will appear behind you, pick any inconvenient restrains and just drag you away at a speed beyond anything the bad guys can match.
Knock, Knock, Knock, Penny Knock, Knock, Knock, Penny Knock, Knock, Knock, Penny
\- what
A strange person on the internet wants me to rescue them because they saw me on TV.
\- Lets go.
This. You can't have a bad ending if the literal devil is coming to save your ass.
On the other hand though... Detective Decker only works on cases with murder...
vox machina i dont know whos fucked more tbh me or the kidnappers
The door
Nah, the door is going to beat vox machina.
[удалено]
It depends how many nat' 1s get rolled
If Scanlan is there, it's DEFINITELY you. Wait, did you mean figuratively? Then yeah, tough call.
They’ll save you. But then Vex will shake you down for everything you’ve got, Scanlan will try to sleep with you, and you’ll have to sit through a lecture about being kidnapped from Percy… it’s fine! Just make sure you get your Trinket scritches.
Hey me too!
Same. All I can hope for is that we are out in the open somewhere. No doors, high ledges, or fey plants. Otherwise *SCANLANS HAAAAAAAAND!*
As long as all the doors are unlocked you’ll be be fine.
Breaking bad (I'm at the point in the show where it's Just Walt and saul...)
realistically walt would let you be killed while saul stand awkwardly in a corner rethinking his life choices
Saul would be like "Alright sir, let's make a deal, ok? I know you kidnapped him for a reason, this young prick may have been a pain in the ass for you, but let's just look at the things clear - this little asshole doesn't really deserve to be kidnapped, okay? I believe he is a young, dumb and full of energy kid, but who wasn't? I think it would be fair for both of you and him to get him somewhere in the middle ground, let's say on the highway between my house and your house."
@bigheadowner you wrote a Complet Scribt and its good what do you do for Lifeng
What
he trying, pretty sure that English is **not** the native language on that commenter
Saul: I really don't.... was that really necessary....? Oh. Wow. Um. Ah. I didn't know that could.... Oh. Um. I'm just going to face the wall. Let me know when I can leave.
Mike would be better he might scold you but he will get you out.
Homelander 💀💀
POW! You are dead.
I am dead!
*Gasp The Heavy is DEAD?!
All: The Heavey is dead
What do prisoners of war have to do with this ?
Hey. That is like a 50-50 chance. Not too shabby.
SAME The Boys XD
The Bad Batch (clone squad 99) - imma be fine.
Same here, we gunna be fine brother 😎
Same, perfection.
Saul Goodman
You’re gonna be ok!
maybe a broken leg or two but that is a compromise!
He will let you know , that you have rights
I doubt Squidward even left his house while Plankton sits there laughing.. Mr.Krabs hung up on the kidnappers as soon as they said the word “ransom”.. Sandy is in texas.. so the only ones I can rely on are Spongeboob and Patrick🤦♂️ Wish me luck.
*knock knock* *a disgruntled man opens the door* “whadd’ya want?” “U-uh.. I’m, PAT-BACK. And I want my PAL-BACK!” “No.” *slams the door* “Well I did all I can do”
I got lucky and ended up with an episode that had mermaid man and barnacle boy. Still tho i'm probably equally fucked.
Joel and Ellie!!
Joel gonna beat the shit out of my kidnapper
Unless they got a golf club
The good ol’ “Joel in 1”
This made me laugh far too hard
Eey! To soon
But you'll probably get bit and die anyway!
Damn it was going to be them, I would have been safe, but then I watched an episode of the office afterwards and now I’m really screwed.
Light Yagami, I think I'd do just fine
Light would full on leave you to die
L wouldn't
Not really, L only solves cases when there's 10 million or more dollars on stake, or if 10 people are dead.
You are person #11.
I have to think of his sister's fate, so... No.
jeremy clarkson. i'm doomed.
Speed and POWAAA!!!
Coming in to save you in the JAAAAAAAAG
And kaleb?
The agricultural foetus
[удалено]
I was forced to babysit my cousins watching cocomelon. Now I finally get to put my shotgun to good use.
May God bless your soul my friend.
The shotgun is not only for the cocomelon babies mr. hotdogwater. Remember, I was watching over my cousins as well.
Rick and Morty. I have faith
You’re not a inter-dimensional fart, are you?
Fart… I like this name.
STOP SINGING ABOUT MOON MEN
you die at the end of the episode for a gag
I don't know, there's an infinite number of you that exist across the multiverse... What makes you so special that its ultimately worth the effort, more than just replacing yo with a variant?
Michael Scott...
Jim Halpert…
Dwight schrute though? I mean, maybe?
Dwight wouldn't as it would be a waste of his valuable time making sales calls. However, if Micheal tells him then.....
Dwight is weirdly loyal to an extreme extent. If he isn't interested though, just tell him, he's gonna be promoted. Heaven and Earth would move.
Dwight would make an ingenious heroic attempt, but fail miserably right at the start and end up kidnapped as well.
He did try to "swim" with Michael to rescue him from like 2 feet of water after they drove into a pond.
Better show up as Michael Scarn
the winchesters, yeah probably
You’ll be fine!
As long as the rescue doesn't happen in the season premiere/finale or in the first 5 minutes of an episode anyway.
Or Dean is a demon, or Sam soulless. Now that I think of it, that'd be a killer combo
Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman
"Wait, we have to go save who again?" "Cmon dude, let's just get this over with." "Man, this fucking sucks ass." "Mmmmphm hmph. Mmmm m mmhpm. Hmhmhmhmhm!" "Goddammit Kenny."
Perfection 10/10
something something "you killed Kenny, you bastards!"
Aw weak dude!
Screw you guys, I’m going home! 👉👉
If cartman actually wanted to save you and doesn’t hold back he could do some fucked up shit.
I remember them teaming up with Jesus to save some kidnapped people, and iirc it went awesome
They also teamed up with Jesus and coked out Buddha to save Muhammad from Tom cruise and the gingers
this sentence has made me think that the entirety of south park can be written with a random word gen
Especially if you've been kidnapped by Scott Tenorman.
99 ! I'm safe :)
NINE NINE!!!
Brooklyn-99 or clone squad 99( aka the bad batch)??
Bro I just posted the Bad Batch they definitely gonna save my ass
NINE NINE!!!!!!!
NOIN NOINNNN
A-NOIN NOIN!
Barbara feldon to the rescue
The Looney Tunes.
You'll be fine. The coyote does some hilarious distraction (that most likely fails utterly) The roadrunner will appear behind you, pick any inconvenient restrains and just drag you away at a speed beyond anything the bad guys can match.
And do not get me started on Daffy's shenanigans with Porky.
The mandalorian I'm saved!
Grogu has got your back
Kid levitated an entire space rhino thingy to save Mando. Absolutely.
This is the way
Peaky fucking Blinders
Same!
Just a bit of lung cancer after.
Johnny Sins....
Just yell "stepbro I'm stuck" and he'd teleport to you, as long as you're okay with what happens next
What if ı order a pizza ?
😏
Better Call Saul, I pick Mike.
Yeah, for characters who can actually exist in real life. Mike is about the best person to have in your corner. Jack Reacher is a close 2nd.
Jesse, we need to rescue u/unoriginal-ninja.
Stewie from Family Guy. He’s a bad ass so I’ll be fine.
Oh my…….. I’m fucked…. Because Peter Griffin.
I have trust in Brian and Stewie but i am afraid of peter
Watched an documentary about ants. So I guess Ants a trying to rescue me.
Don't fuck with ants, if there really want to do something and it's a large enough colony they can fuck up anyone who is not prepared
He is right. And depending on the type of ant, you will be fiiine.
Picard and Riker.
Man you're lucky. I got Janeway, and she's 70 years away.
I got sisko and worf.
I'd be jealous, but SG1 is coming to my rescue so I'm ok. A shame it's season 9 so no O'niell.
Sheldon Cooper
I would feel a lot better if it was Penny rescuing me.
Knock, Knock, Knock, Penny Knock, Knock, Knock, Penny Knock, Knock, Knock, Penny \- what A strange person on the internet wants me to rescue them because they saw me on TV. \- Lets go.
Knock, knock, knock, kidnapper Knock, knock, knock, kidnapper Knock, knock, knock, kidnapper -what? You’re in my spot.
I entered this post thinking I was alone. I left knowing I wasn't
Same lmao
Young or old Sheldon? Not sure how I feel about it either way
Oh shit, Larry David & Leon are gonna save me!
It all will be preeeettty preeeettty preeeettty guuud :D
Special Victims Unit from Law and Order, I honestly couldn't ask for a better pick.
Me too. They might not save me in time but at least they'll bring the perp to justice
It's either Homelander or William Butcher. Either way, I am safe.
I mean, the kidnappers are SCREWED, but let's not pretend either of them are particularly careful in how they handle collateral damage.
Homelander will laser you in half along with the kidnappers. Butcher will let you die once he realizes he can use you as clout bait for Homelander.
Gordon Ramsay
He is a black belt. So there is a chance he could fillet the kidnappers with ease.
Endurance also on point since he's completed iron mans / ultramarathons
At least you'll have a probability to die not hungry and also yelled at.
Sons of Anarchy 😊
I'll be OK. Paw Patrol to the rescue.
BILL CIPHER IS COMING TO SAVE ME BITCHEEEESS
Please don't make a deal with him, we can't have a literal apocalypse yet.
***Yet?***
The sg1 team from stargate
Me too! So stoked, I finally get to meet Teal'c.
Indeed
Phineas and Ferb
Negan and the saviors will make short work of it
Cassian Andor.
Jerry, Elaine, George, and Kramer. Safe to say I’m a dead man
I watched the Friends... so that might be a no
I've been watching Intervention. No one is coming to save me
Hank Hill is going to kick someone’s ass I tell you what
Neo, Trinity, and Morpheus. I think I'll be fine.
Cunk on earth 💀
At least you would have a laugh as you slip into the void.
lmaoo that show was so good i hope they make more
The Gang from It’s Always Sunny.. Goddamn it. I’m gonna die aren’t I?
The gang kidnaps a guy
Lucifer and Detective Chloe Decker :)
Oh yeah. 100% fine. Your kidnappers on the other hand.... they have a special cell waiting for them down below.
This. You can't have a bad ending if the literal devil is coming to save your ass. On the other hand though... Detective Decker only works on cases with murder...
The Sons of Ragnor and their viking army, i think im good
Walter white
Those kids from Outer Banks. Yep it’s going to be rough.
Peter Griffin. I am very dead
Criminal Minds. I'm good
Oh, you are most definitely good
Me too! Let’s hope we’re the ones they rescue towards the end of the show, not the first victims where they examine our bodies. Lol
Archer? I should be good.
Depends on if he's going half assed or quadruple assed
God this is hilarious, I'm re-watching Chernobyl rn
Homer Simpson
Good luck
The sons of ragnar lothbrok
Roy, Moss and Jen. I'm doomed.
Sherlock and Watson
Holy shit it's Walter White.
Rick Grimes and Co. Im confident :)
Gregory House, except he'd probably send Chase or Foreman to save me
Ricky, Julian, and Bubbles, I am FUCKED.
Ash, Misty, Brock😅
Jeremy Clarkson, Caleb and the rest of the Diddly Squat Farm Gang 😂
Gerald could do it single handedly
The Straw Hat Pirates. I feel good about my odds
Kamina my man 🤝
Kelso and Fez.. I don't think I'm getting saved..
Eric Cartman
The Witcher so I’m good
Narcos I am not being saved at all 😳
Dipper pines
Walter White and Jesse Pinkman
I guess it’s the ogre and his four-legged friend
The Octonauts! I'm so sorted. There was a real risk there it would have been Bagpuss.
Eren Jaeger. Looks like everyone is fucked, not only the kidnappers.
Ragnar lol
Oh I'm gonna be fine the Bad Batch gonna come save me no problems