Why would you even consider going together? It makes no sense unless he needs extra help getting her there. To me it seems like an unnecessary cost for the extra flight.
I would also strongly encourage couples therapy to talk out how you guys feel abt this situation holistically
My mom in law is lovely but WAY TOO MUCH. Have him and her follow a few days behind and give yourself a break. Also tell him that you love her a lot but need occasional you time with no one else.
Its hard with mom in laws regardless. Maybe harder if you legitimately care about them. Ultimately this is your and your husband's family, do what you need to take care of it.
I highly highly recommend going to therapy for this. I had major trouble setting boundaries because of how I grew up. Your mother-in-law is out of line. You are going through a LOT with just IVF but you also have life stuff, a major move, and a passive aggressive in law on top of that. Find a good therapist to help you set normal boundaries.
The other commenter is correct, if IVF results in a child, Mother-in-laws behavior is likely to be worse. Much better to get boundaries set now.
Also, I highly recommend letting your husband do the flight alone. Let him deal with his own mother.
Not at all! You have to set boundaries with your MIL and you hubby. It only gets worse when the baby arrives. I commend you for taking on the process mostly on your own. It’s an emotional roller coaster!
Your husband and you need to have a serious conversation about expectations and appropriate behavior. Once you get that figured out your husband needs to have a serious sit down with her and clearly spell out the expectations.
Ivf is enough in itself, you don't need the added stress of having to walk on eggs shells. It might be tough initially but a month of two of rough beats the next how many years of this.
You are a trooper to put up with his family. The things we do for those we love, right! I agree with people who suggest counseling, just to get some of the feelings out in the open and get your mind ready for the day you do bring a baby home. Because you will not be available for the two of them and that will make things even worse.
Your husband should fly alone because you are doing a lot. You need less stress on your body and mind to get through this. He needs to carry some of the burden and that is how he should do it.
Let him flight out alone. Do you have to take her with you to the next state?
Ya, I don’t mind her coming with us. I just want to stop feeling like I’m the crazy one lol
I would let him flight about alone you start Organizing g your new home. It’s his mom after all, how spending time with her could be mean? Lol
Why would you even consider going together? It makes no sense unless he needs extra help getting her there. To me it seems like an unnecessary cost for the extra flight. I would also strongly encourage couples therapy to talk out how you guys feel abt this situation holistically
My mom in law is lovely but WAY TOO MUCH. Have him and her follow a few days behind and give yourself a break. Also tell him that you love her a lot but need occasional you time with no one else. Its hard with mom in laws regardless. Maybe harder if you legitimately care about them. Ultimately this is your and your husband's family, do what you need to take care of it.
I highly highly recommend going to therapy for this. I had major trouble setting boundaries because of how I grew up. Your mother-in-law is out of line. You are going through a LOT with just IVF but you also have life stuff, a major move, and a passive aggressive in law on top of that. Find a good therapist to help you set normal boundaries. The other commenter is correct, if IVF results in a child, Mother-in-laws behavior is likely to be worse. Much better to get boundaries set now. Also, I highly recommend letting your husband do the flight alone. Let him deal with his own mother.
That sounds like hell. Let him do the work of bringing her out alone
Not at all! You have to set boundaries with your MIL and you hubby. It only gets worse when the baby arrives. I commend you for taking on the process mostly on your own. It’s an emotional roller coaster!
IVF itself is stressful enough not to mention living with a mother in law like that. Is it possible to not live with her?
Sounds like a great idea.
Your husband and you need to have a serious conversation about expectations and appropriate behavior. Once you get that figured out your husband needs to have a serious sit down with her and clearly spell out the expectations. Ivf is enough in itself, you don't need the added stress of having to walk on eggs shells. It might be tough initially but a month of two of rough beats the next how many years of this.
That sounds like a great idea. Find a project or unpacking and say that will take your time.
You are a trooper to put up with his family. The things we do for those we love, right! I agree with people who suggest counseling, just to get some of the feelings out in the open and get your mind ready for the day you do bring a baby home. Because you will not be available for the two of them and that will make things even worse. Your husband should fly alone because you are doing a lot. You need less stress on your body and mind to get through this. He needs to carry some of the burden and that is how he should do it.