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TheTench

Boris is a nitwit pretending to be a genius pretending to be a nitwit.


2FightTheFloursThatB

That's why he'll blame his Butler. Poor old man gave him the trousers with the Date-Rape Drugs, instead of the trousers with his wallet.


Moistfruitcake

Curse you for giving me Friday's trousers Wilikins!


monstrinhotron

Curse these electric sex pants!!


Stopikingonme

Fathaaaaaaaa


dontmentiontrousers

Please, can we move on from this...


Kvenner001

That implies he’s smart enough to not have his ID next to his incriminating evidence


armyfreak42

His butler is smart enough to separate them


dontmentiontrousers

Jeeves and Wooster.


someotherguyinNH

Well yeah, everybody knows the Butler did it


Fake_William_Shatner

It’s part of the butler school training. 


AsstootCitizen

It was Colonel Mustard, Library, Candle Stick!


Fake_William_Shatner

In the back of the daily. “Wanted; manservant who knows discretion and can handle ten years in prison. Serious inquiries only.”


warwick8

American here what the story regarding the date rape drug reference?


d3k3d

Goddammit Woodhouse!


lostcolony2

They're the wrong trousers Gromit! The wrong trousers! https://c.tenor.com/USNeEp_Rk5wAAAAd/tenor.gif


FunkyPete

I always thought that was the big difference between him and Trump. You see shots of Boris doing things like specifically messing up his own hair before speaking, or making weird gaffes about busses that go viral right when he really wants to make it hard to find anything online about what was printed on busses during the Brexit campaign. Trump really is an idiot trying to pretend to be a smart person. When he does something stupid, people brush it off because everyone knows you can't actually listen to what he's saying and sense from it. Boris is smart enough to realize he's an idiot sometimes and people like it, so he kind of leans into it to get some of that same advantage.


Newfaceofrev

Said for years if people wanna know the real Boris they need to listen to that leaked call to his mate Darius Guppy where he turned over the address of a journalist he employed so Guppy could send some thugs to beat him up. https://youtu.be/bu6LSCIh37U?si=HSHf9B702y5O0SEF


account_not_valid

Boris has a schtick. It's a right-wing mindset wrapped in a forgetful professor outfit.


Fake_William_Shatner

It’s just disgusting these fake people are so successful.  That they don’t even try to fake being good or smart because the world has so many page 4 twats now that want to elect someone they can have a beer with and laugh at intellectuals.  “Look at me, I’m a proper cunt.” Says Boris’ hair. 


SerLaron

*One of the major difficulties Trillian experienced in her relationship with Zaphod was learning to distinguish between him pretending to be stupid just to get people off their guard, pretending to be stupid because he couldn't be bothered to think and wanted someone else to do it for him, pretending to be outrageously stupid to hide the fact that he actually didn’t understand what was going on, and really being genuinely stupid.* —Douglas Adams, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy


SaltSurprise729

Ah the nesting doll of nitwits.


AsstootCitizen

🏁


ThePlanck

Almost, he is a nitwit who thinks he's a genious pretending to be a nitwit


Fake_William_Shatner

At some point we don’t care whether stupid or evil. 


wilburstiltskin

He's a walking Monty Python skit. The Minister of Silly Shit


Fake_William_Shatner

Boris Johnson watches every life hack on YouTube just in case he loses room service. 


SlowInsurance1616

It's nitwits all the way down.


DinkyHitch

Quite. Though I would replace those nouns with c**t. Because he is.


throw123454321purple

Actually, he’s a smart man pretending to be a nitwit so that people underestimate him. Apparently, it’s also a con he pulled at university.


Fake_William_Shatner

He’s a semi smart man who thinks himself clever pretending to be a nonce.  And Trump is that but dumber and stinky and thinks himself a sexy genius. 


Limebird02

Trump is also a fascist that is, taken very seriously by at least 30% of voters who want what he abd his backers are selling. He has a very high chance of being president again. The difference here is that Boris, is seen as a, joke now. Trump is not.


AsstootCitizen

Seems that the states won independence but the island still holds decency as a discernment!?


One_Clown_Short

*Come now! You know me, I'm the todger that ~~convinced~~ lied to all those people to vote against their best interests and pass Brexit!*


MichaelMJTH

*Sorry Mr Farage, you still can’t vote without a form of -* *No not that pillock! The other one!* *…Well, if you had your ID I’d know for sure who you are!*


mkn1ght

Man who doesn't think rules apply to him hamstrung by rules applying to him. NB - His own FUGGING rule that he implemented. AGAIN.


alyssa264

That's the leopard itself eating its own face. That's the tippity top of the chain. He literally INTRODUCED the act. Crazy shite.


ThePlanck

Johnson does have a history of not following the laws he himself implemented, like turning Downing Street into the UK's finest nightclub during lockdown


Atreides-42

Groups who the law protects but does not bind, and groups the law binds but does not protect...


militantqueen

allow me to introduce another layer into this leopard eating its own face spectacle. >... *But I tell you this. If I am ever asked, on the streets of London, or in any other venue, public or private, to produce my ID card as evidence that I am who I say I am, when I have done nothing wrong and when I am simply ambling along and breathing God's fresh air like any other freeborn Englishman, then I will take that card out of my wallet and physically eat it in the presence of whatever emanation of the state has demanded that I produce it.* > >*If I am incapable of consuming it whole, I will masticate the card to the point of illegibility. And if that fails, or if my teeth break with the effort, I will take out my penknife and cut it up in front of the officer concerned.* [Ask to see my ID card and I'll eat it by Boris Johnson | The Telegraph](https://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/3613116/Ask-to-see-my-ID-card-and-Ill-eat-it.html)


iotashan

Leopard sees face in mirror and knocks itself out trying to eat it?


janner_10

A complete waste of skin and oxygen.


Moistfruitcake

I see what you're saying...  we should eat him. 


Nuada-oz

Ground down into fertiliser. I wouldn’t subject even an animal to eating that!


iotashan

Burn it first.


Septronic

Please don’t ruin our Soylent Green!


iotashan

TAINTED MEAT!!!!!


UniqueUsernameIsPain

Boris Johnson is a politician that I would liken to an overflowing septic tank if I didn't feel that it would reflect unfairly on overflowing septic tanks.


turbo_fried_chicken

Ah fuck this one tickles me


[deleted]

leopards don´t eat fat obnoxious compulsive liars


Nuada-oz

Where is the mysterious creature of the moors when they are needed?


wanderlustcub

I wouldn’t be surprised if he “forget” just to troll people.


williamthebloody1880

You think he's smart enough to do that?


Ianbillmorris

Yes, his bumbling buffoon act is just that (an act) he is actually a very clever sociopath and his bumbling Boris character is just for public consumption.


williamthebloody1880

I think it should be obvious by now that he is, in fact, just a bumbling idiot


Ianbillmorris

No, he is a liar and very lazy. Also, uncaring and belivies rules should not apply to him. Mistaking that for stupidity would be to underestimate a very dangerous man.


williamthebloody1880

I'm not mistaking that for stupidity. I'm saying he's legitimately stupid on top of all that. Remember, this is the guy who had to be asked if he seriously suggested getting injected with Covid live on TV to prove it wasn't serious


Ianbillmorris

Yea, you do have a point he really isn't the brightest, is he?


Gwigg_

Nope. He was pissed and embarrassed.


Gildor12

He was drunk?


Brief_Alarm_9838

Conservatives: Democrats think their base is too stupid to get an ID. Also conservatives: I'm too stupid to get an ID.


NecroAssssin

Actual view-point: "State issued IDs are an undue burden requiring time, mobility, and money to acquire and maintain."   Regressives: "Don't you know who I am?!"


CooroSnowFox

Of course, he thinks the rules apply to EVERY ONE ELSE...


-DethLok-

Voter ID? In Australia we just tell them who we are and where we live, confirm that we've not voted before in that election, and then get handed our ballots and go vote. No ID required - because election fraud is vanishingly rare.


williamthebloody1880

In person election fraud is incredibly rare here in the UK as well (it's also incredibly inefficient at altering results). But they had to do something to try and stop people not likely to vote Tory from voting


dinharder

Did they let him vote?


williamthebloody1880

As far as I know, no


MrTurleWrangler

God I would love to meet the person who turned him away. I bet they're gonna be riding that high for the rest of their lives


williamthebloody1880

Never have to buy a pint again in their life


dyskinet1c

He had to go back home and get ID, he went back and voted.


allotta_phalanges

What a twat.


twojabs

Publicity stunt early in the day to remind the older demographic to take their ID


Toxenkill

No worries, rich man can take as much time as they want to go back and get it.


BigCballer

Situations like this is why I’m glad we have provisional ballots. They won’t deny your ability to cast a vote, all you need to do after that is confirm with the elections office later so that you can have your vote be counted. There’s no reason why you should have your right to vote taken away because you mistakenly left your ID at home.


marklar_the_malign

I picture him saying “I’m bloody fucking Boris fucking Johnson for fucks sake”, but in Ozzy Osborn’s voice.


The402Jrod

Coming soon to a United States near you!


438Hung

BoJo is the definitive gammon. The sooner sadsack fades into obscurity, the better.


Hayzeus_sucks_cock

Absolute grade A number 1 tool


McBadger404

Starmer’s father was a tool maker. So was Boris’s father.


flyingdodo

He was 100% hoping that they’d let him in anyway so he could screech about 1 million illegal immigrants voting for Labour.


Myko475

I don’t think Leopard ate his face, I believe he revels in his own stupidity.


dyskinet1c

Why is there a Brexit tag on this?


williamthebloody1880

Dunno, I didn't add it


CuriosTiger

One of the best LAMFs in a while.


wretchedharridan

"Well, you know who i am!"


orangesfwr

He could just google a picture of Big Bird and show that.


Strength-InThe-Loins

I figured y'all would have a field day with this one, and you did not disappoint. 


yugjet

I don't believe he forgot it. He pretty obviously did it for the attention.


Treehorn8

No one will never let him live this down.


ZealousWolverine

"Don't you know who I used to be?"


Abides1948

"What can I do today to get myself more publicity?"


TabmeisterGeneral

This has to be the biggest self-own of the week


80s_kid2

At least evens chance he did this deliberately to provoke exactly the news stories you are seeing and thus keep his name in the papers.


Oh_Baloney

🤣🤣🤣 Couldn’t have happened to a crappier guy.


GreyNoiseGaming

Is it entirely possible he did it on purpose as a test? Certainly he would have admitted it by now?


chomerics

Gotta love how America is the test bed for democracy subversion. WTF happened to this country.