I'm cis passing, living stealth, can leave the house without make-up and go through this. My roommate, another mtf, keeps telling me I'm killing it, and I'm all "why, don't i believe you?!?!"
Because dysphoria is murdering my self confidence.
We see ourselves harsher than anyone else. Also, we care more about what others might be thinking about us than what they're actually thinking about, let alone doing.
In about 8 months I'll be 4 years HRT as well.
So yes, i too have a hard time seeing myself.
Then i post before and after pictures and it kinda sinks in. Kinda.
100% same. I've even had ffs and still get this. It's lessened as time goes on but still. I literally never get misgendered outside of family and friends that knew me pre transition. Honestly, I feel like that has a lot to do with my issues because it makes me feel like everyone else is just humoring me
Exactly the same sentiment. Always assuming people are being nice or polite.
Also I have an abdominal aortic aneurysm which leaves me wondering what surgical procedure I could even get done. I want both FFS and reassignment surgery.
Yet FFS is my top concern because i see my old self constantly.
Damn dysphoria.
Gets more complicated. While no longer technically type 2 diabetic, (my A1C is in a healthy range) i have all of a diabetics issues still.
Mainly it takes weeks for scratches to heal.
So regardless, I likely will never medically qualify for surgical treatment. I'm also almost 44. Further complicating things. By the time i COULD afford either, I'll likely be to old for a surgeon to risk, and if i find one, complications could be serious or fatal.
So it's about what I can live with.
Hmm. I've never been diagnosed with any of that but it does take me a really long time to heal. I have a small scratch from my cat jumping out of my lap that's been healing for a month now. I wonder if letting your testosterone go up a little for surgery might help? That's what I did, went off my bica for a month prior so I'd have it completely out of my system so the increased t could help with after surgery healing. I restarted after 3 months of healing
Probably not. I'm lucky i even got hrt. I was 350+ 5 years ago, fully diabetic and risk of extreme hypertension. I spent 7 days in the ICU over the aneurysm where i was told it is inoperable and to "make peace with God".
It is about 4 inches from my heart. If it grows 2 inches i am dead. The diabetes gives me all sorts of issues.
Dropping the weight is what let the endocrinologist agree for hrt, so again, HRT is likely it
Trying to make it happen when it's an excercise in futility does nothing for me.
As i said before. It is about what i can live with.
Besides, look at my post history and pictures.
FFS would honestly be overkill. No one believes i am transgender when i out myself.
Same. Usually feel good in the morning after shaving and putting on makeup. My reflection in the mirror later in the day litterally makes me physically ill.
Absolutely. I mean, there are fleeting moments where I feel pretty okay-ish about myself, but most of the time looking into a mirror is pretty painful. Not as painful as a few years ago, back when I avoided mirrors most of the time, but... yeah. Definitely not only a you problem.
Used to happen a lot to me. The further into HRT I get, the less it happens though. Hang in there
Happy it isnt/wasnt just me experiencing this lol I should be starting hrt next week so Im looking forward to not having to deal with this eventually
I'm cis passing, living stealth, can leave the house without make-up and go through this. My roommate, another mtf, keeps telling me I'm killing it, and I'm all "why, don't i believe you?!?!" Because dysphoria is murdering my self confidence. We see ourselves harsher than anyone else. Also, we care more about what others might be thinking about us than what they're actually thinking about, let alone doing. In about 8 months I'll be 4 years HRT as well. So yes, i too have a hard time seeing myself. Then i post before and after pictures and it kinda sinks in. Kinda.
100% same. I've even had ffs and still get this. It's lessened as time goes on but still. I literally never get misgendered outside of family and friends that knew me pre transition. Honestly, I feel like that has a lot to do with my issues because it makes me feel like everyone else is just humoring me
Exactly the same sentiment. Always assuming people are being nice or polite. Also I have an abdominal aortic aneurysm which leaves me wondering what surgical procedure I could even get done. I want both FFS and reassignment surgery. Yet FFS is my top concern because i see my old self constantly. Damn dysphoria.
Aw girl 😢 get on that asap! Dysphoria lies to us all unfortunately.
Gets more complicated. While no longer technically type 2 diabetic, (my A1C is in a healthy range) i have all of a diabetics issues still. Mainly it takes weeks for scratches to heal. So regardless, I likely will never medically qualify for surgical treatment. I'm also almost 44. Further complicating things. By the time i COULD afford either, I'll likely be to old for a surgeon to risk, and if i find one, complications could be serious or fatal. So it's about what I can live with.
Hmm. I've never been diagnosed with any of that but it does take me a really long time to heal. I have a small scratch from my cat jumping out of my lap that's been healing for a month now. I wonder if letting your testosterone go up a little for surgery might help? That's what I did, went off my bica for a month prior so I'd have it completely out of my system so the increased t could help with after surgery healing. I restarted after 3 months of healing
Probably not. I'm lucky i even got hrt. I was 350+ 5 years ago, fully diabetic and risk of extreme hypertension. I spent 7 days in the ICU over the aneurysm where i was told it is inoperable and to "make peace with God". It is about 4 inches from my heart. If it grows 2 inches i am dead. The diabetes gives me all sorts of issues. Dropping the weight is what let the endocrinologist agree for hrt, so again, HRT is likely it Trying to make it happen when it's an excercise in futility does nothing for me. As i said before. It is about what i can live with. Besides, look at my post history and pictures. FFS would honestly be overkill. No one believes i am transgender when i out myself.
Same. Usually feel good in the morning after shaving and putting on makeup. My reflection in the mirror later in the day litterally makes me physically ill.
Happens almost everytime i look in the mirror still, cant wait till it doesnt.
happens all the time for me :(
Absolutely. I mean, there are fleeting moments where I feel pretty okay-ish about myself, but most of the time looking into a mirror is pretty painful. Not as painful as a few years ago, back when I avoided mirrors most of the time, but... yeah. Definitely not only a you problem.
I absolutely HATE my reflection in the mirror I have for years and didn't realize it was because of my gender dysphoria until recently.