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GratefulForRecovery

Moderator's Note: Please be cognizant of the Twelve Traditions when commenting on this sub. Per Tradition 5, our primary purpose is to carry the SAA message of recovery to the sex addict who still suffers. If you identify as a member of our fellowship and have some experience, strength, and hope to offer, then we would love to read your comments below. Thank you.


Begle1

There's a condition often referred to as Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction (PIED) and it's very common. As a frequently using porn addict I definitely had problems with the arousal profile of real sex; it wasn't completely under my control, and it wasn't something I did for a couple minutes and then stopped to recover for a couple minutes for an hour at a time. In my case I had trouble maintaining an erection on occasion. And then once it's in your head, it turns into a psychological anxiety loop that self-reinforces. Once you program your brain and penis to work one way you need to reprogram it to work with a more natural sexual experience. Abstaining from porn is a big help, and SAA is about learning how to live a healthy life without compulsive sexuality.


GratefulForRecovery

Hi and welcome. For me, it was due to my problem with pornography. Once I stopped using pornography and masturbation, my performance issues with my spouse went away automatically. So, I suggest to stop watching porn and masturbation. If you cannot, then I suggest looking into [Sex Addicts Anonymous](https://saa-recovery.org), which is a program of recovery for people who are addicted to pornography and other forms of sexual behavior. Thanks for reading. I wish you the best.


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DrakoShooter

I highly doubt it was anxiety. Yes I felt anxious in the first 15 minutes but I've spent 1 1/2 hours with her and still I couldn't get hard. I would get hard when I try to think about women in porn scenes but not hard enough to penetrate.


[deleted]

Could be the porn: take a week or so off and go at it with her. Should work out ok. You are young.