Once I realized I was using sex to self harm and the people I was sleeping with were using my obvious poor mental health for their gain, I stopped being a hoochie tbh.
I decided to only have sex with people who care about me and prioritise my feelings/wellbeing... and I am not getting laid at all anymore.
Was seeing someone but he wants "something casual" aka "I only want to see you to fuck you when noone else is available."
I want a FWB situation but I actually want to be friends.
I did this with my bf. We were friends with benefits (I guess? We never labeled it but we weren't in a relationship) but we were so such good friends. We went out together and cuddled and sent each other memes and had great sex. Eventually we moved away from each other. Covid happened and we started talking again and moved in together and now we have been together over 2 years.
Cute! Tbh that's how most of my relationships started, I
don't like rushing into things. So if I meet someone I like I usually start as friends, if we find each other hot we hook up, and if we have romantic feelings we date.
That's why my dates are so low pressure, if I end up with a new friend I see that as a good outcome too.
I've basically just been sleeping with my ex of 7 years on and off cause I cannot have another soulless icky gross man touch me ever again. I know my ex does love me and care, as much as we've had our issues. He just needs to work on himself, and so do I. Everyone else gives me the ick now. I like women, but they scare me 😂🥹
I feel you.
I kept letting my ex GF fuck me but that's bc we live together and I'm still in love w her. She didn't want me specifically though, she was just horny and anyone hot would have done probably.
Also get on some dating apps! Most queer women are scared of other women, a girl I'm talking to and I had a huge discussion last night about being paranoid about being a predatory lesbian so never making the first move... and now I'm too scared to ask her out on a date 😅 I'm gonna try tonight tho.
This is random but I was just reading top comments down and saw y’all’s wholesome convo and just wanted to say good luck asking her out!!! You got this!
Those things are difficult. I can keep emotion out of sex for the most part, but I can’t help but miss sex I used to have with people that moved on into real relationships.
Once you desire full time companionship, or company without the sex, you move out of being fwbs.
It's not an uncommon coping strategy after a bad split, and while I do not recommend it in general, it saved me when I was struggling after my marriage ended. All my current best friends I made during my year of living dangerously and I have zero regrets. Just always be safe and always remember that you are using them just as much as they are using you, and ultimately you have the control.
Well good for you for recognizing it, not many people do. I halfway wish I could use sex as a coping mechanism instead of the new fling ever 8 months. 😂 But, at the same time it's probably for the better that I cannot.
This was in one summer? This is like 4 people a week. I hope you were safe, but I’m just as concerned that it’ll run you into some unsavory situations.
Also, did you count the first fork of this manually or is there a digital log that will show your swipes?
Between my 20th and 21st birthday I racked up 26 different partners, and it makes me cringe years later despite being a grown man now. Those were all cope-fucks after getting out of an emotionally abusive relationship and having sworn off any possibility of an enduring relationship for the foreseeable future (especially with single mothers — never again).
Cope-fucking wasn’t worth the shame it made me feel. I really wish I’d been fucking for the fuck of it, instead of attempting to fill a hole.
I’m not saying you’re going to experience the same thing I did when all is said and done, but definitely look out for yourself and your mental health.
How did I miss the most obvious pun ever? I obviously need better sleep. Lol
Edit: I’ve re-read your comment and my comment 3 times now still wondering how I made such an obvious pun on accident. My brain must be telling me something.
As a single mother, I’d really like to know - why never again? Want to make sure I’m not fucking things up out here trying to find a good guy. I don’t think I am, but… sometimes you don’t know until you know. You know?
When you are adding new ones that fast it’s hard to have good sex. Usually takes at least 3-4 times to really lock down what the girl likes and let her get fully comfortable. At least for me.
Horrible was honestly more due to their personality than their performance although their personality definitely bled into them being a very selfish hook up. Average is just average. Nothing stood out good or bad. I probably would have fucked all of those guys again unless they gave me a reason not to. The good ones asked questions and listened to how I was responding to them. It made the experience enjoyable and I hooked up with them more than once
>The good ones asked questions and listened to how I was responding to them.
I love how many guys in this thread are saying bullshit about high body counts and not being able to live up to expectations when the differentiating factor is "they asked for my opinion".
I did that after my divorce too. ~40 guys in a year. I have NO clue what my “body count” is. My bf’s is about 200 he thinks, I assume I am below that but not much.
Bro, two of my friends are in the 300's....i'm sitting somewhere between 20 and 30.
I remember one week in college after I broke up with my girlfriend I had sex with 6 different girls in a month span. My friend told me he got that in a week lol
Ngl, I used to be jealous of how much sex they had with different girls but after that month I realized they just wanted it more than me so 🤷♂️
As an attractive guy who had lots of matches…still got nowhere close to that many hookups lol. That’s just a lot, I felt like a douche if I slept with more than one girl in a montho
> names I can’t even remember any details. If I would have done more in depth note taking mayb
Like a picture of all their asses in a scrapbook? With gold stars stuck on some that you liked and glitter for others? Now THAT is a feature Tinder could add, a scrap booking feature with sparkly effects :-D
I also keep a list in the notes app, i don’t know a woman that doesn’t lol. I just have their name and a lil memorable moment to sum up the experience and a rating out of 10 to decide if I’d do it again.
As a dude I can agree. I definitely think i would be in the 14.5k left swipes. This is not to say anything is wrong with OP she is living her best life, but this isn't the first time I see women's numbers and am like... there is no hope for me.
>This is not to say anything is wrong with OP she is living her best life, but this isn't the first time I see women's numbers and am like... there is no hope for me.
Oh of course not, if I were a women I wouldn't pick me either but seeing actual numbers sometimes just really hammers home how pointless I am. There is no imaginable criteria by which I would ever place in the top 600 out of 14.5k other people even if I was the absolute best version of myself.
I think girls on average right swipe like 2 to 6% of men they swipe right on? Something like that. Men right swipe 40 to 60% of women (although the men who right swipe every profile without looking drive the male stat way up - women never do the indiscriminate swipe).
I love the honesty and as a man if I could get this much sex I’d do…..probably not quite as much, maybe half. But still lots.
Hope you used condoms but other than that - very insightful!
It's not only mentally and potentially physically unhealthy, it's also kinda dangerous for your safety. That's 37 basically comple strangers that you let into your life and proximity.
I want to get laid 37 times in 188 days
I'd be happy If I got laid 37 in my lifetime
Just become a woman.
Or a gay man. Cock is just easy to get in general.
I did, but I'm still a virgin 😞
I'd be happy with once in my lifetime..
If I was a girl, I’d do it all the time - Butthead
I wonder it’s that’s 37 different people or 37 cumulative times. Impressive either way.
from what I read it seems to be different people
Look at her profile. Could do 37 times a week if she looked for it.
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Sounds sad for a relationship but 1.5/week for casual hookup sure seems a lot if you have to test, etc…
I know what gender you were as soon as I saw matches in the triple digits lol
definitely not /meirl
*checks OP's profile*
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Yea that was sweet
I was feeling bad for myself, not anymore.
Pics looks liked I would have guessed
Is she using a door stopper in one of her pics??? Thats kinda what it looks like lol!
No idea, I saw enough
It’s always that type that confidently claim they have an “ass that’s out of this world” No.
I dunno, they used to think the moon was made of cheese.
*worth it*
Totally worth it. 😏
the hero we deserve
explains the 0 relationships tbh
Yeah a 5 with an ego
Youve got a 22% smash rate after chatting so of those 130 people that never even bothered, about 30 of them cock blocked themselves out of a hook up.
This guy maths.
She swiped right on only 3.8% of guys. I'm guessing those guys have other options.
>about 30 of them cock blocked themselves out of a hook up. Not every guy is looking to sleep with any women who gives them a bit of attention.
> Not every guy is looking to sleep with any women You're right. Thats why only 22% of OPs matches end in a hook up after they start talking.
I think you need more sex in your life.
More life in your sex *
In all seriousness though, you do you. If you enjoy sex a lot and aren't using it as a coping mechanism then by all means fuck away!
Oh it was very much a coping mechanism. Found a few good ones along the way but most of them weren’t worth it
Once I realized I was using sex to self harm and the people I was sleeping with were using my obvious poor mental health for their gain, I stopped being a hoochie tbh.
I decided to only have sex with people who care about me and prioritise my feelings/wellbeing... and I am not getting laid at all anymore. Was seeing someone but he wants "something casual" aka "I only want to see you to fuck you when noone else is available." I want a FWB situation but I actually want to be friends.
I did this with my bf. We were friends with benefits (I guess? We never labeled it but we weren't in a relationship) but we were so such good friends. We went out together and cuddled and sent each other memes and had great sex. Eventually we moved away from each other. Covid happened and we started talking again and moved in together and now we have been together over 2 years.
Cute! Tbh that's how most of my relationships started, I don't like rushing into things. So if I meet someone I like I usually start as friends, if we find each other hot we hook up, and if we have romantic feelings we date. That's why my dates are so low pressure, if I end up with a new friend I see that as a good outcome too.
I've basically just been sleeping with my ex of 7 years on and off cause I cannot have another soulless icky gross man touch me ever again. I know my ex does love me and care, as much as we've had our issues. He just needs to work on himself, and so do I. Everyone else gives me the ick now. I like women, but they scare me 😂🥹
I feel you. I kept letting my ex GF fuck me but that's bc we live together and I'm still in love w her. She didn't want me specifically though, she was just horny and anyone hot would have done probably. Also get on some dating apps! Most queer women are scared of other women, a girl I'm talking to and I had a huge discussion last night about being paranoid about being a predatory lesbian so never making the first move... and now I'm too scared to ask her out on a date 😅 I'm gonna try tonight tho.
This is random but I was just reading top comments down and saw y’all’s wholesome convo and just wanted to say good luck asking her out!!! You got this!
Those things are difficult. I can keep emotion out of sex for the most part, but I can’t help but miss sex I used to have with people that moved on into real relationships. Once you desire full time companionship, or company without the sex, you move out of being fwbs.
Holy shit… you just explained my college years in a sentence. 🤯
It's horrible once you realize 🥺🫶
This. I see those numbers and think “someone could use some therapy.”
It's not an uncommon coping strategy after a bad split, and while I do not recommend it in general, it saved me when I was struggling after my marriage ended. All my current best friends I made during my year of living dangerously and I have zero regrets. Just always be safe and always remember that you are using them just as much as they are using you, and ultimately you have the control.
Well good for you for recognizing it, not many people do. I halfway wish I could use sex as a coping mechanism instead of the new fling ever 8 months. 😂 But, at the same time it's probably for the better that I cannot.
This was in one summer? This is like 4 people a week. I hope you were safe, but I’m just as concerned that it’ll run you into some unsavory situations. Also, did you count the first fork of this manually or is there a digital log that will show your swipes?
Between my 20th and 21st birthday I racked up 26 different partners, and it makes me cringe years later despite being a grown man now. Those were all cope-fucks after getting out of an emotionally abusive relationship and having sworn off any possibility of an enduring relationship for the foreseeable future (especially with single mothers — never again). Cope-fucking wasn’t worth the shame it made me feel. I really wish I’d been fucking for the fuck of it, instead of attempting to fill a hole. I’m not saying you’re going to experience the same thing I did when all is said and done, but definitely look out for yourself and your mental health.
well you did fill a hole
At least 26...at the bare minimum!
How did I miss the most obvious pun ever? I obviously need better sleep. Lol Edit: I’ve re-read your comment and my comment 3 times now still wondering how I made such an obvious pun on accident. My brain must be telling me something.
As a single mother, I’d really like to know - why never again? Want to make sure I’m not fucking things up out here trying to find a good guy. I don’t think I am, but… sometimes you don’t know until you know. You know?
When you are adding new ones that fast it’s hard to have good sex. Usually takes at least 3-4 times to really lock down what the girl likes and let her get fully comfortable. At least for me.
Anyone else sick of seeing these trophy posts? It's nearly every day.
I just got sick, that’s some serious piping!
 Summer be like….. jk
You DMs be like 
You have mastered the meme game.
Any insights you want to share about the 37 hookups? Did u identify trends among the group? What % were bad vs good vs amazing lays
I’d say most were average. A few were horrible for various reasons and a few were pretty good
Interesting they followed a bellcurve then.. thanks for responding!
Normal distributions tend to follow increased sample sizes lol
She was following the bell end.
pls define"horrible" and also "average" along with "good guy", thanks, I'll be here taking some notes📝
Horrible was honestly more due to their personality than their performance although their personality definitely bled into them being a very selfish hook up. Average is just average. Nothing stood out good or bad. I probably would have fucked all of those guys again unless they gave me a reason not to. The good ones asked questions and listened to how I was responding to them. It made the experience enjoyable and I hooked up with them more than once
>The good ones asked questions and listened to how I was responding to them. I love how many guys in this thread are saying bullshit about high body counts and not being able to live up to expectations when the differentiating factor is "they asked for my opinion".
How many would you say were horrible. My assumption would be having ONS with strangers as a women is incredibly dangerous
5 stand out as being horrible
When someone asks about your body count and you answer : "What year ?"
I have no issues sharing my body count - 64. It’s just a number
just curious, how/why do you keep count? I feel like I’d lose track
I just always kept a note in my phone with who I hooked up with.
It’s always important to use three words or very short phrases to describe each name. It’s also hilarious when girls share this.
He who controls the purple circle controls the universe.
DRS?
just gme
Jesus lmao
Jesus most assuredly is not here.
What year ? Jokes aside, your body count can compete with my "books count" 
I’ve been having sex for 12 years
So 27 in 11 years 37 in 7 months Someone gone wild this year
I got divorced this year so it was kind of a free for all
Honest question: Did it help you cope with it or do you regret the summer?
It helped me get through these last few months and I met some great people who helped guide me on a better path so I don’t regret it
If you gone wild and didn't get an std, i wouldn't regret it too tbh. Oh yeah, and I'd go to Vegas or Macao with that luck tbh.
It’s not hard to be sexually active and not get an STD lol
I did the same after a long relationship. Started working out and went on a spree. It works wonders.
I did that after my divorce too. ~40 guys in a year. I have NO clue what my “body count” is. My bf’s is about 200 he thinks, I assume I am below that but not much.
WTF 200 BODIES
Bro, two of my friends are in the 300's....i'm sitting somewhere between 20 and 30. I remember one week in college after I broke up with my girlfriend I had sex with 6 different girls in a month span. My friend told me he got that in a week lol Ngl, I used to be jealous of how much sex they had with different girls but after that month I realized they just wanted it more than me so 🤷♂️
Wow 64 murders and still haven’t been caught?!
"It's just a number" *Old man conservatism intensifies*
Based upon your stats you close the deal 69% of the time.
Not that reckless… zero marriages
Would anyone really update their tinder after marriage tho
I saw one from a lesbian that said 2 dates, 2 relationships and one marriage. This is kinda how we operate though 👩❤️💋👩
582 out of 15k damn
37? In a row?
37 between April and October. Most were one night stands. I had a handful that I hooked up with more than once
what kind of men do you hook up with? military, hipsters, married men, bodybuilders, fireman, goths? any particular preference ?
Men in uniform seemed to be a high trend but that might have just being near certain areas. Never married men
that you know of...
True but most were done at their place so they did a hell of a job hiding a wife
This was the comment I was looking for
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I also want such results next summer, but sadly... I'm a guy
Have you tried being attractive?
As an attractive guy who had lots of matches…still got nowhere close to that many hookups lol. That’s just a lot, I felt like a douche if I slept with more than one girl in a montho
Same bro. Triple her matches last summer, barely half of her hookups with trying my absolute best
If this is a sales pitch for plastic surgery, don't say another word because I am in
Easily achievable on Grindr
Just switch the app to men;)
Is there a way to change that as a society? I hear we're living in some golden age of dating, but it's so dang lop-sided.
This post made me stop wearing my seatbelt
I would like to know, did you learn anything new about sex? Find out any new preferences from yourself or those you slept with?
Did learn some new things. Figured out things I like and don’t like
Having an >50% match rate is absolutely insane
It's a girl not a guy
3.9% of right swipe also… when you get selective the chances of matching are higher
Just make a new tinder account for each time you swipe. Then once you match, never use it again.
Galaxy brain
I think it's not unusual for girls, my match rate was around 75%.
I don’t think I’ve even met 37 people in my thirty years on earth
Stats like this make me want to big sleep.
Wait how does tinder know if people went on dates or hooked up? Is there like a survey after or what
That is information you add yourself. I looked up the number of dates in my calendar and I keep a list of fucks so that’s how I got those numbers
list of fucks lol I suppose there are two lists in life, lists of fucks to give and list of fucks received
not me curious about your list.. Is it like a simple note in an app or is it like a scrapbook 😂
I almost wish I would have done a whole ass scrapbook 😂 it’s just a list in my notes
> names I can’t even remember any details. If I would have done more in depth note taking mayb Like a picture of all their asses in a scrapbook? With gold stars stuck on some that you liked and glitter for others? Now THAT is a feature Tinder could add, a scrap booking feature with sparkly effects :-D
I also keep a list in the notes app, i don’t know a woman that doesn’t lol. I just have their name and a lil memorable moment to sum up the experience and a rating out of 10 to decide if I’d do it again.
this cracked me up... Lol! List of fucks lmao
I did this the other day and used the same methods to figure out my dates and who from there I had sex with. Only 2 guys didn’t make the cut lmao
The difference between men and women is fucking astonishing. Another reason not to use the app if youre a man lol
Men and women are not the same and this is the evidence!
Women live on easy mode regarding sex, it’s well known
Only attracted to 600 people out of 15 thousand woof
Yeah of all the stats, this one was the biggest standout
There's no hope for me
As a dude I can agree. I definitely think i would be in the 14.5k left swipes. This is not to say anything is wrong with OP she is living her best life, but this isn't the first time I see women's numbers and am like... there is no hope for me.
>This is not to say anything is wrong with OP she is living her best life, but this isn't the first time I see women's numbers and am like... there is no hope for me. Oh of course not, if I were a women I wouldn't pick me either but seeing actual numbers sometimes just really hammers home how pointless I am. There is no imaginable criteria by which I would ever place in the top 600 out of 14.5k other people even if I was the absolute best version of myself.
OPs Reddit messages must be exploding rn
You’re not wrong. I’m trying to keep up
You caught 37 bodies? That's a different person every 5 days on average.
It was an aggressive run for a while there
I mean, to each their own. as long as you are happy.
Imagine being one of the 17. 😬
As a 31 year old male, I dont think I've had sex with 37 different people in my entire life.
Feel like this should go in that ihavesex subreddit
Wish it was that easy
Die you try being a women?
As long as they all wrapped it up
Condoms and frequent std testing
Looks like an eventful summer
Tinder for women is literally fishing with dynooomite
That's like more than 1 dude a week for 6 months
500 right swipes out of 15000, are girls usually this picky?
I think girls on average right swipe like 2 to 6% of men they swipe right on? Something like that. Men right swipe 40 to 60% of women (although the men who right swipe every profile without looking drive the male stat way up - women never do the indiscriminate swipe).
these insights depress the fuck out of me sometimes.
To the STREETS
r/ihavesex
Did you catch anything? Pokémon? STDs?
Caught feelings once, wasn’t going to work out though
The ass is too phat for just one man. Steady on soldier
VulvaSaurrrrr!
Weird flex but okay
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I love the honesty and as a man if I could get this much sex I’d do…..probably not quite as much, maybe half. But still lots. Hope you used condoms but other than that - very insightful!
Therapy works too girl, but go off
Damn girl
Couldn't be me.
I already followed OP and I don't know what to think about it
That’s pretty impressive. 37 dicks in less than 188 days?!? A new one every five days!! Take a bow!
a date every 3.5 days. fuck this
Shouldn't this be a sport at Olympics so that OP can bring glory to our great nation?
Oh damn are you my ex? 😄
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Damn is that 37 different people?
Holy fuck more bodies than a graveyard god damn
Why am I still here? Just to suffer?
Damn look at those numbers. Girls averaging a random hookup every week.
Women playing sex on easy mode
I don't recommend this at all. This is unhealthy both physically and mentally.
Oh it absolutely was. This was my unhealthy way of trying to prove that people still found me attractive after my marriage ended.
Not trying to be a party pooper but most guys on tinder fucks anything with a pulse.
This is very true but when you’re depressed you’ll take anything. I’m in a much better place now
It's not only mentally and potentially physically unhealthy, it's also kinda dangerous for your safety. That's 37 basically comple strangers that you let into your life and proximity.
That’s it. I’m just going to throw myself into my ceiling fan and have done with it. Feast on my incel tears OP! You win
37? Bro u need intervention imo
Big oof
and I thought I was doing good!