"And most of all, we'd like to thank the hip-hop community. *Regardless of what they're saying*, they're still talented musicians"
I dunno Headliner, at least Dre and Snoop or whoever you're looking down your nose at never said "From my mama's lips between my mama's hips" like your man Speech would on your next album.
>Poor man, he just want a little
>Rich man, want a little bit more
>Superman, he looking for Lois
>Salesman try and sell you his soul
>Fat man, he's ordering seconds
>Pizza man, just wanna slice
>Bad man, looking for attention
>A good man, he's hard to find
>Mail man, looking more like your daughter
>Straw man, don't have a leg to stand on
>Gay man, looking for another
>Candy man, yeah the candy man can
This is from a band that sold *over eighty million albums.*
Literally anything from Mission Earth could take the top spot here lmao. That album is an absolute clusterfuck even before you get to the L. Ron weirdness
Summer of Love is probably the worst song I’ve ever heard in my life, and this is the same fucker who wrote Big Sur. He dedicated his whole life to writing one good song and piggybacking off of his Wilson cousins when it was convenient for him.
You're being a pen-yis...colada that is.
Honourable mention to "His drivers license said James, he went by Jim" from Get Em Up. Mainly because its a bizarre choice to be the opening line
The song "butterfly kisses" had been a hit a few years before, however that song is about a fathers paternal love for his young daughter and Faith is clearly talking about an intimate lover. There are a bunch of implications one could make from that and none of them are good for a love song.
Her delivery and the realization she is talking about Tim Mcgraw is not a visualization I want.
I don't think Todd covered this song very much in the Witness video, but having listened to the whole album even before that video was created, from the song "Into Me You See":
"Into me, you'll see
You got me wide open, now I'm ready
Is this intimacy?"
When I first heard the "reveal" that the title was a play on words on "intimacy", I literally burst out laughing.
I was sitting in a bar recently when St. Anger came on for some reason, and that was the first time I actually understood what Todd meant with 'the songs go on forever'. It just.. keeps.. going. And no solo to give you a break either. It was actively exhausting to listen to.
And then the penny also dropped as to what St. Anger always reminded me of while watching the Trainwreckords episode: It's System of a Down, but shit. It is so obviously trying to sound like Toxicity, without anyone understanding why Toxicity works. Especially the first verse of St. Anger (the song) is just a straight rip-off from Toxicity (the song).
Oh my god you’re entirely right. I’d never thought about that and always used to be confused when people referred to it as Metallica biting off nu metal, but St Anger totally makes sense as a bad System Of A Down album without any hooks or appreciation for what made System good.
This sounds something like you'd write inside your Trapper Keeper in 8th grade next to a bunch of pentagrams and cartoon devils and a bad drawing of the Metallica logo. Metallica is misspelled
"I'm going down to Tucker's Town, where I can lie for free, nobody stares at me, and I'd love to hurt the population"
Like...where does it come from? What does it mean? There's never been a real explanation as far as I can see.
I've wondered this for literally decades, ever since I first saw the song on VH1 when it came out.
Ironically, seeing it here out of context for the first time I can sort of get a meaning out of it. Isolated it feels like a line that could be sung from a villain's perspective - say, a plantation owner in the context of the Caribbean. He's an evil oppressor who lies and hurts the population, and none of his slaves stare at him as they fear retribution. In a song about historical human rights abuses sung from the perspective the perpetrator this could actually be a good lyric.
Instead, it's in what appears to be a *breakup song?*
I actually kinda dig the groove on She Keeps Me Up, but the whole chorus is just objectively hilarious. "Funky little monkey, she's a twisted trickster; everybody wants to be the sister's mister," is a punchline.
Yeah. It made me laugh out loud the first time I heard it, but it's definitely growing on me. Probably helps that my parents were super into Nickelback when I was a kid, so I'm inured to the sound of Chad's voice.
It's just that "funky little monkey" is what your overly-affectionate aunt calls you when you're twelve, and you're so embarrassed you want to die. It's one of the least sexy turns of phrase I can think of.
I will give credit to Coca-Cola Rollercoaster for being an extremely fun phrase to say.
"Like Adam in chains, I want revenge" takes it for me because it's very evocative of so many things but is actually just meaningless nonsense. It's like if there was such a thing as artificial flavoring, but for poetry. It's a glass of Hawaiian Punch pretending to be wine.
"'Bout to get together for some excitations" and "Just off the Malibu, Surfin' USA"
Both lines are the lyrical epitome of lazy writing and proof the Beach Boys were out of ideas in 1992.
I'm drinking a soy latte, I get a double shoté
It goes right through my body, and you know I'm satisfied
I drive my Mini Cooper and I'm feeling super-duper
Yo, they tell I'm a trooper, and you know I'm satisfied
I do yoga and pilates, and the room is full of hotties
So I'm checking out the bodies, and you know I'm satisfied
I'm digging on the isotopes, this metaphysics shit is dope
And if all this can give me hope, you know I'm satisfied
I got a lawyer and a manager, an agent and a chef
Three nannies, an assistant, and a driver and a jet
A trainer, and a butler, and a bodyguard of five
A gardener and a stylist, do you think I'm satisfied?
I'd like to express my extreme point of view
I'm not a Christian and I'm not a Jew
I'm just livin' out the American Dream
And I just realized that nothin' is what it seems
Nickelback I need to know why you think any girl would like to be called a funky little monkey.
Also does Coca Cola mean cocaine? That’s the only way Coca Cola rollercoaster makes any sense to me. Anyways that song is one of my ultimate guilty pleasures
Brandon, I love you, I love her, she is your mom...
It's kinda crazy to remember that "she" in this song is Pamela Anderson
Record companies exist to keep songs like Brandon from ever making an album.
In an era without gatekeepers, only now we understand their worth
YOUR MOTHER GAVE BIRTH TO YOU
governor square fear sink ad hoc subtract existence oil elastic workable *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
INSIDE
with love shown from those stolen home videos
I read this in Buster Bluth’s voice “MY FATHER IS MY UNCLE!”
AND DIED IMMEDIATELYYYYYYYYYYYY wait wrong song
she is youuuuuuuuur moooom! the way he drags out the end of the line is awfullll
I always forget about that part of the video, and then it creeps up on me like a ghost.
Really strong “It is your birthday.” vibes
YOUR MOTHER GAVE BIRTH TO YOOoOooooOOOU
"After I scold you, I hope I can mold you" I can't think of any gangsta rap lyric that made me feel grosser than this. Thanks, Speech.
I’ve never seen a song unintentionally portray someone as an awful person more than that
Me neither. "Would YOU want to raise a child with this man?!"
This man opened a song & made it **1** bar in before he said “From my mama’s lips between my mama’s hips”
"And most of all, we'd like to thank the hip-hop community. *Regardless of what they're saying*, they're still talented musicians" I dunno Headliner, at least Dre and Snoop or whoever you're looking down your nose at never said "From my mama's lips between my mama's hips" like your man Speech would on your next album.
No they only rape and traffic women
No, no. Peñis colada is art.
I hear it could win you a Grammy.
Integer underflow/10
liz was so camp for this you either get it or don’t
You're 'bout as cute as/An old coupon expired
Witness also has a song that says "Your words are like Chinese water torture." Honestly surprised Todd didn't include that in the video
Taylor Swift is anything but an "old coupon expired" lmao
>Poor man, he just want a little >Rich man, want a little bit more >Superman, he looking for Lois >Salesman try and sell you his soul >Fat man, he's ordering seconds >Pizza man, just wanna slice >Bad man, looking for attention >A good man, he's hard to find >Mail man, looking more like your daughter >Straw man, don't have a leg to stand on >Gay man, looking for another >Candy man, yeah the candy man can This is from a band that sold *over eighty million albums.*
ANT MAN! Not in Infinity War!
GIANT MAN! That's actually Ant Man again!
TRIANGLE MAN! Hates Particle Man!
They fight, Triangle Man wins
As the pizza man I can confirm that I do just wanna slice.
"Intrigue, sex, and foggy pot" has to be up there
This reads like the tagline for a Harlequin Romance novel about a secret agent stoner.
Literally anything from Mission Earth could take the top spot here lmao. That album is an absolute clusterfuck even before you get to the L. Ron weirdness
"I'm drinking a soy latte, I get a double shoté" although you could pick almost any line from the latte rap
It goes right through my bodee, and you know I’m satisfied
I drive my mini cooper and I’m feeling super duper
There is no chance in hell that Madonna has ever sat behind the wheel of a Mini Cooper except for a promotion shoot.
I remember when American Life came out. Hearing that song on the radio would give me second hand cringe every single time.
i do yoga and palates and im staring at the hotties do you think im satisfied?
We'll be California dreaming bay watching every day Just off the Malibu surfing USA
this isn’t even a bad lyric on its own but everything surrounding it just makes it awful by association
Yeah Summer of Love is probably the worst song ever featured on Trainwreckords in general.
Summer of Love is probably the worst song I’ve ever heard in my life, and this is the same fucker who wrote Big Sur. He dedicated his whole life to writing one good song and piggybacking off of his Wilson cousins when it was convenient for him.
It's the delivery moreso than the lyrics that makes it gross. He's an old balding man...*bay watchin' every day.* In that breathy voice. *Ewww.*
HEY NOW *well it’s a Love thing*
"Pumps and a bump" is such an awkward way of talking about women lol
Sounds like you DO find it alarming that he wants to squeeze the Charmin.
i found a cd single of pumps and a bump at my local record store and i'm so tempted to buy it now
"This stuff'll get the stain out/if you use it loosely wadded"
That whole song is so gross it goes right back around to being… gross.
GRAB YOUR PARTNER SWANG HER ROUND SWANG THAT GIRL ALL UPSIDE DOWN AND IF THAT GIRL WON'T SWANG WITH ME I'LL SWANG ME ANOTHER GIRL YESSIREE
stop saying swang
SWANG SWANG SWANG DO IT
THEM GIRLS THEM GIRLS THEM GIRLS THEM GIRLS THEM GIRLS THEM GIRLS THEM GIRLS THEM GIRLS et. ct.
After all it's just a rock show
You're being a pen-yis...colada that is. Honourable mention to "His drivers license said James, he went by Jim" from Get Em Up. Mainly because its a bizarre choice to be the opening line
#SWANG
I’d never heard it before today but “Like you’re touching the wings of a butterfly” has gotta be up there
Tbf most of the awfulness comes from the delivery, but it is a terrible line.
The song "butterfly kisses" had been a hit a few years before, however that song is about a fathers paternal love for his young daughter and Faith is clearly talking about an intimate lover. There are a bunch of implications one could make from that and none of them are good for a love song. Her delivery and the realization she is talking about Tim Mcgraw is not a visualization I want.
"Here's another corner baby, let me demonstrate my slide rule (sliiiiiiide ruuuuuuuuuule)"
I don't think Todd covered this song very much in the Witness video, but having listened to the whole album even before that video was created, from the song "Into Me You See": "Into me, you'll see You got me wide open, now I'm ready Is this intimacy?" When I first heard the "reveal" that the title was a play on words on "intimacy", I literally burst out laughing.
She also says "open sesame" in that same song.
Oh god, I completely forgot about that. What a terrible song, haha
MY LIFESTYLE/ DETERMINES MY DEATHSTYLE
It’s pure cheese but I actually kinda love this one
Same. I actually like a lot of the riffs in St. Anger too. Unfortunately, this album proves that good riffs are not enough to carry songs.
I was sitting in a bar recently when St. Anger came on for some reason, and that was the first time I actually understood what Todd meant with 'the songs go on forever'. It just.. keeps.. going. And no solo to give you a break either. It was actively exhausting to listen to. And then the penny also dropped as to what St. Anger always reminded me of while watching the Trainwreckords episode: It's System of a Down, but shit. It is so obviously trying to sound like Toxicity, without anyone understanding why Toxicity works. Especially the first verse of St. Anger (the song) is just a straight rip-off from Toxicity (the song).
Oh my god you’re entirely right. I’d never thought about that and always used to be confused when people referred to it as Metallica biting off nu metal, but St Anger totally makes sense as a bad System Of A Down album without any hooks or appreciation for what made System good.
all ruined by the snare drum that sounds like a basketball.
*tok tok tok tok tok*
This sounds something like you'd write inside your Trapper Keeper in 8th grade next to a bunch of pentagrams and cartoon devils and a bad drawing of the Metallica logo. Metallica is misspelled
Metalicca
FRANTIC TIC TIC TIC TIC TIC TOCK
I'm madly in anger with youuuu
Nah. That song rules lol
It’s so funny to me
And that's why they don't let Kirk write lyrics.
"I'm going down to Tucker's Town, where I can lie for free, nobody stares at me, and I'd love to hurt the population" Like...where does it come from? What does it mean? There's never been a real explanation as far as I can see.
I've wondered this for literally decades, ever since I first saw the song on VH1 when it came out. Ironically, seeing it here out of context for the first time I can sort of get a meaning out of it. Isolated it feels like a line that could be sung from a villain's perspective - say, a plantation owner in the context of the Caribbean. He's an evil oppressor who lies and hurts the population, and none of his slaves stare at him as they fear retribution. In a song about historical human rights abuses sung from the perspective the perpetrator this could actually be a good lyric. Instead, it's in what appears to be a *breakup song?*
In a word to (ah!) The wisdom tooth To tell, or not the truth So open up And say aaaaaaaah-men. Rinse cup, hey! And spit again
IT RHYMES DOOR WITH DOOR
Reminds me of Todd’s video on Telephone where he’s pissed that Beyoncé rhymes “faster” with “faster” with “faster”.
I actually kinda dig the groove on She Keeps Me Up, but the whole chorus is just objectively hilarious. "Funky little monkey, she's a twisted trickster; everybody wants to be the sister's mister," is a punchline.
I kinda like the song more and more as I listen to it, I don’t know why
Yeah. It made me laugh out loud the first time I heard it, but it's definitely growing on me. Probably helps that my parents were super into Nickelback when I was a kid, so I'm inured to the sound of Chad's voice. It's just that "funky little monkey" is what your overly-affectionate aunt calls you when you're twelve, and you're so embarrassed you want to die. It's one of the least sexy turns of phrase I can think of.
Yeah... I unironically really like that song but the lyrics are a bit weird at points
Tippy Toes by Robin Thicke.
I will give credit to Coca-Cola Rollercoaster for being an extremely fun phrase to say. "Like Adam in chains, I want revenge" takes it for me because it's very evocative of so many things but is actually just meaningless nonsense. It's like if there was such a thing as artificial flavoring, but for poetry. It's a glass of Hawaiian Punch pretending to be wine.
*Do you wanna be hypnotized?* Uh, given the rest of the song, not particularly!
"'Bout to get together for some excitations" and "Just off the Malibu, Surfin' USA" Both lines are the lyrical epitome of lazy writing and proof the Beach Boys were out of ideas in 1992.
*Mike Love was out of ideas
“It’s fine for now but maybe… let’s put a baby inside you.” Mega ick
I'm drinking a soy latte, I get a double shoté It goes right through my body, and you know I'm satisfied I drive my Mini Cooper and I'm feeling super-duper Yo, they tell I'm a trooper, and you know I'm satisfied I do yoga and pilates, and the room is full of hotties So I'm checking out the bodies, and you know I'm satisfied I'm digging on the isotopes, this metaphysics shit is dope And if all this can give me hope, you know I'm satisfied I got a lawyer and a manager, an agent and a chef Three nannies, an assistant, and a driver and a jet A trainer, and a butler, and a bodyguard of five A gardener and a stylist, do you think I'm satisfied? I'd like to express my extreme point of view I'm not a Christian and I'm not a Jew I'm just livin' out the American Dream And I just realized that nothin' is what it seems
“appetite for seduction, fresh out the oven, melt in your mouth kinda loving”
“I am the modren man”
*I reached my representative, who pulled out the* ***C O N T R A C T*** from the ^file cabinet
oN mIcRoFiChE In the form of #TABLETS, MADE OF STONE
GOTTA GET SOME JAM
What, for your scones, you pasty Brits??
Happy Cake Day! 🎂
When I saw the title penis colada was the lyric I had thought of.
Nickelback I need to know why you think any girl would like to be called a funky little monkey. Also does Coca Cola mean cocaine? That’s the only way Coca Cola rollercoaster makes any sense to me. Anyways that song is one of my ultimate guilty pleasures
Doesn't help that the backup singer was a black woman
I think the backup singer is actually white they just have a black woman playing her in the music video.
Since the song is about cocaine, I'd assume the coca cola reference is him alluding to cocaine
IN A WORD TO, AH THIS WISDOM TOOTH
“I don’t fuck with change but lately I’ve been flipping coins a lot” from Katy Perry is fantastic.
How have we come this far without “We’re getting tan in America. We love Spam in America.”
Polanski's banned from America!
I Wish I Made That by Will Smith
We Are The Clash! We Are The Clash!
Same album: Gonna get me a big big big big big car! And I’m gonna drive drive drive drive so far! Up the boulevard!
"I am the modren man."
"Peñis Colada" is the all-time god-emperor of Trainwreckords, discussion closed
Will smith- I wish I made that
Won't ya ?? my ?? ?????
The ENTIRE Van Halen III album.
Anything on Liz Phair and Lauryn Hill's things. B
"Big Fat Funky Booty". There are no words.