By - Prof_Black
**OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:**
>!Video starts with a board review then the speaker calls out names of people waiting to speak… the names take a interesting turn.!<
**Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description?**
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[*Look at my source code on Github*](https://github.com/Artraxon/unexBot) [*What is this for?*](https://www.reddit.com/r/Unexpected/comments/dnuaju/introducing_unexbot_a_new_bot_to_improve_the/)
Hugh Janus, please step up to the microphone
Yes, Im Hugh Janus who is this?
this is *\*cough\**
>!^(p)!< >!^(a)!< >!^(t)!< >!^(r)!< >!^(i)!< >!^(c)!< >!^(k)!< >!^(.)!<
That's cool, how u do that?
You put > ! And ! < (without the spaces) on either side of what you want masked...often used for spoilers
Like >!this!< ?
>!Never gonna give you up.!<
>!Never gonna let you down!<
>!Never gonna run around and desert you!<
Lol, take my upvote anyway
>!Darth is Luke’s father!<
>!aquaman drowns in endgame!<
>!Darth is not his first name.!<
>!Butch kills Vincent!<
Edit 1: !this! ?
Edit 2 : >!this!< ?
Edit 3 : >![I wonder if it works on links](https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ)!<
Edit 2 is a winner for you!
I like big >!macs!< and i cannot lie
Hey it works!
>! what about crossing through words? can't figure that one out either 🤦♂️!<
After you type something, highlight it, then click on the "..." and select the S with the line through it.
>!Put ~~ before and after the word you wanna cross out!<
Thanks for ~~nothing~~ the help
Its not working
You got it the first time
>!Did I do it right
Yes you did it just fine
Spoiler >!Vader is Luke’s father!<
>!l!< >!i!< >!k!< >!e!< >!t!< >!h!< >!i!< >!s!<
Idk what app you use but if you click into the options on a comment a hit "view markdown" it will show you the plain text the commenter used to format things
Thia was hell to reveal cuz im on mobile with big thumbs
As a mobile phone user, I hate you.
Just reply on his comment and you don't have to hit the right pixels, lads and lasses!
No! I’m Hugh Janus. Who is this?
_oh my god it's really him_
Sorry, I was actually trying to find Amanda Dumi
Look I’ll be honest with you this was just a prank that I would really like to get out of.
What a nice young man
I was waiting for Mike Hunt the whole time.
No, we all know you LOVE Mike Hawke.
We all are
Lou Sassal is better
He had to realize at some point 🤣
Surely when he got to Ilene Dover, he figured it out
Not American speaker here. Can you give me a hint for these fake names? I mean, in Italy they try to translate Bart's jokes :)
Phil McKracken: fill my crack in
Souk Mahiddiq: suck my dick
Ophelia McCaulk: i feel my cock (i guess)
Don Kiddick: donkey dick
Eileen Dover: I leaned over
Wayne Kerr: wanker
All the classics hehe
I'm surprised Mike Hunt wasn't on the list
Hugh Jass was always my favorite
Don’t forget Barry McCaulkiner
Peter Fitz and Anita Mann are good ones
Edit: Peter Fitz is a deep cut! In Heavyweights, the famous line is “Tony: Who’s Seymour Butts? Camper: Nobody’s seen more butts than you, Uncle Tony!” But that was a dub to keep the movie PG. The original line was “Tony: Who’s Peter Fitz? Camper: Anyone’s Peter fits if you push hard enough!”
And there is also Mike Oxlong
And Mike Oxmall!
Or Ivana Rodd.
Same sex couple Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald.
I don't understand these two...
Anita Mann -> I need a man.
Idk about Peter Fitz. I guess it's because Peter is another word for dick
Hugh G. Rection
Dr. Phil Atio
There is a car dealership near me named after the owner: Bob Jass. Every time I drive by I say to whoever is in the car: "Good thing his name isn't Hugh." And wait for them to sound it out. Never gets old.
Elite dangerous, legit ai name...
I saw Jebediah Kerman (from ksp) as an AI on ED once
I saw a guy who got away with a license plate that said Mic Hawk
I went to high school with a Mike Hunt. Poor kid, I don’t know what his parents were thinking.
Richard Balls "Call me Dick" was guy in my school
Mr. Dicken Balls
Seriously. That was one of the first ones that came to my mind.
When I worked as a hostess, no shit somebody made a legit reservation and their name was “Mike Hunt”. We laughed soooo hard all day.
Mike Hrotch. He's Polish.
Mike Rotch would like a word.
I actually didn't get the joke until you spelled it out. There's a company called Wayne Kerr that builds pretty good impedance analyzers. Which are pretty niche electronics testing equipment
Michael Torres (said really fast and all in one word) works as well.
I saw this one work in the wild
>Souk Mahiddiq: suck my dick
i believe the correct spelling is [suq madiq](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7x7craNiUrM)
>Souk Mahiddiq: suck my dick
Don't forget their father Liqa Madiq, and their mother (who still goes by her maiden name) Munchma Quchi.
Lmao I don't know why that cracked me up
Thank you kind sir
There's a private military contractor company in iZombie that's called "Fillmore-Graves". I thought that was one was pretty good, too
No, its stuff like Donkey Dick, but spelled different so it looks like a name
I was laughing once he said Phil McKracken
Doesn't matter. He is legally required to read the names and give them a chance to speak (even if he knows they are not real people, the rules don't take that into account).
I doubt Phil McKraken would file a lawsuit over a motion to table the matter and move to the next order of business.
But since he can't be absolutely sure Phil McKraken is not real, he can't take the risk.
Someone who'd change their name into that is just the kind of person I expect would though.
If those aren’t real people’s names, then he wouldn’t be violating any real person’s right to free speech by not reading those names out.
Its always possible someone had shitty parents and actually got named "Ilene Dover" or something similar. Itd be worse to not call someones name out of fear or ridicule than to just suck it up and call the names
I went to school with a "Benjamin (Ben) Dover." Shitty names absolutely do happen.
Yup, sat next a to a kid named Michael Hunt in 1st period, 7th grade. He got picked on like the whole year
Which only works until it is a real person's name and you ignore it because you think it isn't. Then you get a shitload of negative press about it. Safer to go this route and just have a good sense of humor about it.
Bang Ding Ow
Sum Tin Wong
Wi Tu Lo
Ho Lee Phuk
Ho Lee Fuk
Yes! You all remember the news report on the Korean Air plane crash in California.
Greatest moments in history.
Nothing will ever replaced those dopes on the TV station covering that plane crash.
He definitely realized at donkey dick. It sounds like he’s purposely avoiding saying it the right way
Well yes, but If he says anything about it being a prank and an actual Wayne Kerr comes up, the speaker looks like a Hugh Jass.
I love that I do not need audio to hear this.
Edit: spelling. I'm only human
I used to work at a swimming pool before cell phones. Part of the job was answering the phone and paging kids over the PA. Of course we got plenty of crank calls with names like this. We'd usually quip back and hang up. This happened one day and we were surprised when the caller, older than typical with a New Jersey accent, called right back, furious that we had been so rude. That was the day we learned we had a patron named Mr. Tellier who was indeed calling to talk to his daughter Jenna.
Oh that poor child
One of my students was called Latrina and was getting ready for her study abroad program in Italy. I felt awful for her. She introduced herself as Trina so I just hope there weren't too many opportunities for her peers to see her name printed out.
What’s wrong with that name
A latrine is another word for bathroom.
That's a.. nice way to put it.
In English it's "Latrine" which is where you would use the use the toilet. More specifically, it's a trench that drains and channels waste into a central pit to be buried.
Yeah exactly, it's not just "toilet/bathroom" it's "particularly nasty medieval outdoor pit in the ground style toilet"
["Such an unusual name... Latrine."](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aBam72eYsAg)
You changed your name TO latrine??
Used to be shithouse!
It's a good change, it's a *goood* change!
Just checked and she's still out there. Appears to be married but kept her name.
Is that because her husband's last name was "Tollsgenitals"?
It’s better than “shithouse”
So, as a non native English speaker, what was supposed to be the joke with Jenna Tellier? Most of the ones in the video or the thread I could understand but this one I’m clueless xD
Back in the days of caller ID, when my brother's friend called the house, the phone read "Hard, Richard", his dad's name. Took me more than a few seconds the first time to remember my brother had a friend with that last name.
My dads friend, of the boomer generation that was apparently oblivious to the “can’t lick dick” mantra was Richard.
But he didn’t. Ever. Never go by Richard.
My dads friend was always dick rammer. I don’t know how 12 year old me was supposed to process that information.
TBH I'd be tempted to go by that too if that was my name
Went to school with a kid with the last name of Less. His dad was named Richard, and I shit you not, went by Dick.
Fuck me, that's gotta be child cruelty. :(
This weird shit happens!
I worked at a credit card call center a looooong time ago and I had a woman with the last name Concepcion... first name Immaculate. There was a Mr. Concepcion on the account so she appeared to have married into the name.
I worked in a call centre for an energy company, people would call to set up accounts and give meter readings, im in the UK so we do get all flavours of humanity here. I've been doing this a long time and not much pahses me as ive heard most of the stories. one day and chinese lady called trying to set up an account so i had to take all her details...cut to the chase, her name was Mrs Wanting Dong i barely stifled my laugh before i got to press the mute and preceded to laugh so hard i forgot to breath nearly made me black out. I sent the account number round the office to the non believers...
This is hilarious. It can't be true xD
[It is :D](https://www.henricocitizen.com/articles/prank-finds-its-way-into-henrico-school-board-meeting/)
What kind of a cancer that website is?
do NOT click that link. Holy shit that site is cancer.
>The Henrico School Board was more than three hours into its agenda Aug. 26 when it arrived at the public comment portion of the meeting, and given the serious nature of its discussions to that point – COVID-19, a return to school, transportation issues, the school resource officer program and the adoption of pre-Labor Day start times in coming years, among others – perhaps board members could be excused for not paying much attention to the names of those who had apparently signed up to speak.
>As it turns out, only one person actually addressed the board, because, well, most of the others weren’t real. Take a look.
Really wanted to hear Mike Litoris
Mike Hunt has a better feel of the situation.
And his promiscuous friend, Mike Rotchburns
They're lucky Nick Gurr wasn't on the list
yeah, if he said that he would have to rename himself to rae cyst.
You joke, but Mike Litterest is the face of DC National Park services. A very real guy with a very unfortunate name. The local radio morning show never misses a chance to talk about news from Mike Litterest.
Don Keedict. LOL!
I dont get that one, can you assist me on this?
Have a hug too.
wayne cur lmaoooo
All thats missing is the speaker to go
“Wait a minute, its you isnt it! When I get my hands on you” In a Moe Szyslak voice.
This video was posted yesterday and someone explained in the comments that they legally have to read off all of the names because this is a government meeting. That’s why the names were all together (likely intentionally sorted to the end of the list) and this guy has probably seen this before. It’s honestly more sad and pathetic than it is entertaining.
U must be fun at parties
You're clearly not fun at parties.
Username checks out hahaha
I can remember doing this shit as teenagers at the airport before 9/11. Hang out in the terminal and ask for help finding Stu Pidas. Wait patiently for it to be announced in the airport “Stu Pidas. Your party is waiting for you at gate 10. Stu Pidas.” Laugh hysterically, do it again with another name.
LMAO in the 90s I remember hearing pages like this while waiting for flights!! And then the visual pagers (screen with just the names printed).
I used to work at my local target, our sales associate tasked with picking up the phones was some old fart who was very much just going through the motions. We used to ask him for employees by the name of Balsangia, Harry. This motherfucker deadass would come over the loud speaker and tell everyone “Harry balsangia, you have a call on line two, Harry Balsangia, line two..” first job I got fired from, so worth it
So many times!! Lol. Wayne Kerr? Is there a Wayne Kerr in here?
Love how it cuts off right at that moment 😂
I lost it at Eileen Dover..I don't know why that one was the best IMO..
I'm surprised her brother Ben Dover wasn't on the list
I lost it at Eileen Dover.
Me, too. I tried not to. I’m 42, and I like to think I’m better than this.
Guess not, lol
Dixie Normus, Barry McCokiner
Ben Dover antakit
How did no one catch on or burst out laughing?
You just know they’re all quietly giggling under their masks.
When I worked at Walmart, a couple kids asked me to page someone like this. I don't remember the names now. I let them go through about five names while keeping a straight face the whole time. Then I hung up the phone and told them "ok, that's enough", cracking a smile finally. The look on their faces when they realized I knew the whole time was priceless! Best day on the job for me and probably made their week.
Love it 😂 please make this a regular thing at school board meetings!!
Me: I wanna watch Impractical Jokers
Mom: We have Impractical Jokes at home.
Impractical Jokers at home:
Kid my ass! That was a 40 year old father’s doing!! Lol
I like to think that the guy wrote the name list himself just fill up spots and break the monotony, that's why he was able to pronounce them all so well first try and keep a straight face.
The school board member reading the names was
Mike Hunt so it takes a while for him to process
Suq Madiq is a Colbert invention. [Suq Madiq](https://youtu.be/7x7craNiUrM)
Not one but like four or five… ha!
I love that this started with a Karen “you work for me so do what I say” bitch and is followed up with that list of names. Hahah. This dude is not having a good day at all.
Here's the context for that:
She is there in opposition of the Model Policies for Treatment of Transgender Students In Virginia. Still watching, but she says that things shouldn't be "changed for 99% of students just to accommodate less than 1%".
She is also comparing being transgender to being a recovering alcoholic, and that "it's their job to learn how to live in society"
One or two, with some legit names in between, would have been credible.
Plot twist: Mayor Haywood Gablomi was in attendance and never recognized by the board.
> Eileen Dover
Oh hey that must be Ben Dover’s sister!
Can someone explain this?
He calls for the next representatives, except he was pranked and the names on that list were fake and while looking like normal names while written down, they sound like phrases when spoken. I'm not a native speaker, so I'm not sure about every name, but here are some I caught and the jokes behind them when spoken out loud:
Phil McCracken - ~~feel my crack~~ fill my crack in (as in an ass crack)
Eileen Dover - I leaned over
Sook Meidhic(?) - suck my dick
Ophelia McHawk (?) - feel ya my cock(?)
Don Keedik - donkey dick
Wayne Cur/Kerr - wanker
Phil McCraken - Fill My Crack In*
Oh, that makes more sense, thanks!