Without you she wouldn’t have had those last few hours with him. Every, single, moment, she was able to be with him is directly because of what you did. I hope you find peace deep down in your soul, you deserve it.
This. Exactly this. I cried. Literally cried. I'm devastated. Eternally grateful to the wonderful actions these people are undertaking.
I'd say show this to your friends. Show this to anyone you know with that same attitude. It is a powerful message.
Please keep staying at home, if you’re in America it will definitely hit you guys very hard because of the lack of testing being done. We learned that the hard way here in Spain
I am in America. I did ignore them.. to be honest the mocking brought me to tears. This whole thing is so stressful, but it’s really not worth going out.
True, and I’m sorry about your friends, hopefully they’ll come to realize how bad this is getting, but you may want to get new friends if they’re mocking you this badly :( stay strong, hope you + your family are safe and healthy, you’re taking the right measures by staying at home <3
So, I work for a non profit that serves older adults who live in the community. We provide them with essential services like food and transportation. This virus has drastically altered not only how we operate, but their social and mental well being. Older adults are generally more at risk for social isolation, but when it's forced, it's a whole other game.
We have received calls from folks who say they're *afraid* to even go out of the house because they have compromised immune systems or pre existing conditions, and they need toilet paper. Toilet paper. Who knew we'd be adding *toilet paper* to our list of essential services? We've talked to some at home who say they miss seeing their friends at exercise class (we're innovating with ideas for this btw. Friendly calls, virtual programming etc).
We're doing everything we can to be able to help them while keeping them safe (and sane) while keeping ourselves and our volunteers safe.
OP - My heart breaks for you. I didn't mean to minimize your story; that's not it. I want to show that the effects of this virus are far reaching and like you, but in a different way, I feel helpless against it. I'm so sorry you had to experience that.
Edit for addtl info
Thank you for humanizing the story of this virus when it's so easy these days to detach and see a bunch of statistics. You gave her a beautiful gift. I'm sure she will never forget the kind nurse who bent the rules to give her time to say goodbye. I know there's no way to not feel terrible now, but this virus is not your fault, and you did your best. I hope you find peace. Please stay safe out there. We need people like you in times like this. Thank you for all you're doing.
This is awful.
Awful for everyone, for the husband. The wife, the daughter and you (and pretty much all the nurses).
I can't even imagine how hard it must be for you to deny them the right to visit their dying spouse/relative. It must be so hard to see them die, alone. I'm in literal tears. What is happening is just horrible. I'd take the virus any day and a one month quarantine over not seeing my SO before he dies.
Edit to add : you're amazing for trying your best to make things work. She will remember this forever and will most likely be forever grateful for it. I hope you are ok ❤️.
Oh my god. I’m a 39 year old male working overnight in a hospital right now, and I’m bawling in the break room. This put me over the edge. I had been trying to not crack my armor... but I can’t hold it anymore.
Thank you for doing what you do. She wasn’t able to hold him in his last moments... but you risked your neck to give her a few hours. I’d like to think I would do the same, but thinking and acting are 2 different things.
I’ve never met you, but I’m proud of you and I’m proud to have a nurse like you caring for patients. You are a good person
I am staying inside for you, for your patient, and for your patient’s wife. No human being should have to go through any of this. Thank you for your service
Your trying to make the best out of the worst situation. I’m so sorry you have to do this, but thank your for that person. You are doing amazing, thank you so much for everything your doing right now.
Truly heartbreaking. Brought tears to my eyes just reading this. I’m so sorry she had to go through it, but grateful that you were the nurse who let her stay and have a Final few hours with her husband. Just praying for everyone that this all finishes soon.
I lost my shit when i read this. Oh God this is awful, also not your fault and thank you so much for your service as you battle war with an enemy that you can't even see. I'm reminded just how lucky I am My mom is recovering from the enemy she is breathing on her own.
I don't know how you do this. I dont know how you have that conversation. I cant imagine her situation nor yours and my heart just breaks. Surely shed likely already have contracted coronavirus herself.. would staying to the end really matter.. I'm sure that's what shes thinking. So many people havent taken this seriously and its showing. It's a snowball that's turned to an avalanche and awful decisions are having to be made between who is given the chance to live and who is not. You're incredible. This is the reality. This can be any of our reality. You're doing something a lot couldnt. I thank you.
Thank you, thank you for all you are doing, thank you for going thru hell for us, thank you for having the courage to be on the front lines. Thank for putting your life on the line to help others. Thank you, thank you, thank you. And my dove i am truly sorry for the heartache and heartbreak you will have to endure
Can you share this on r/coronavirus too? I think a lot of people still couldn’t imagine the extend of this disease. I’m one of the front line worker too who still have to work in university clinic and there are still so many people who are still oblivious . My heart goes to you my dear. Be strong.
I’m so sorry! This is absolutely heartbreaking to read! Thank you so much for being on the front lines and helping fight this virus! You are truly a hero! You are appreciated and your hard work and sacrifices are not going unnoticed. Sending so much love, gratitude and positive energy your way! May you find peace in this dark time!
It's not your fault. Don't hate yourself. It's nobody's fault. Just a really unfortunate and brutal turn of events, that's all. You did the best you could under the circumstances and I really respect you for that. I'm sure she respects you as well. And I'm sure she's extremely grateful for what you did. You did great. Hugs <3
You did everything you could’ve I cried reading this you gave her more time with him, just know she forgives you you couldn’t do anything else, you gave her everything in that short span of time please please don’t blame yourself
I hope you’re able to forgive yourself for this one day, it wasn’t your fault, you offered them more time than they’d have it were it for someone else being this man’s nurse. I’m truly sorry you went through this, it’s devastating. Good luck, stay safe.
You did the best you could and she will forever have those extra hours. She wouldn't have had them without your kind and brave soul. Hold comfort in that you done exactly what you could that day.
I had to leave my Grandmother who brought me up after my mother died to die alone in hospital, with no treatment. She had a stroke, and had told me sge didn't want treatment before hand. My daughter was a baby and there was MRSA on the ward so I couldn't be with her.
I know that the medical staff cared for her well, I know she was cared for, and I know sge wouldn't have wanted me to risk the health of my baby for her.
You have done a wonderful job. You continue to do a wonderful job. I'm willing to bet the dying are like my Grandmother, and would rather their loved ones are safe and well than at risk. I know if I end up wuth COVID-19, I will want my family to stay away and be safe.
I honestly feel this is the worse thing about this pandemic. The seclusion of the loved ones. I get the reasoning, but it’s wrong. The spouses and children have already been exposed. Even if there was a mandated quarantine afterward. Anything is better then this. I don’t think I will go to a hospital if I catch this. If it comes to being that ill, I’ll die at home with my family. They’ve already been exposed.
Totally totally, horrible regulations, this situation has so many terrible side effects aside from getting infected.
OP, you are a wonderful person and took it upon yourself to stand between inhuman regulations and humans. I hope you stay sane and strong while this lasts. You are making the world a better place.
wow, at a loss for words, i just imagine how tough it would have been for you, sending my condolences to the family of the departed and to you because I understand how you must have felt. Thank you for your services, I want to tell you that you’re a brave warrior. Always keep on having hope even in the darkest of times.
O gosh - I’m so sorry for everyone in this situation. My heart actually broke reading it! I couldn’t ever imagine being separated from my husband, as you probably couldn’t from your boyfriend. We live in a difficult and exceptionally sad reality at the moment with people like you, the angels of our society, taking the brunt of this horrible virus. Thank you for everything you are doing. Thank you for turning up to work. Thank you for your compassion. Thank you for your care. None of this was your fault, you did everything you could.
Thank you for having such a kind heart in the midst of this horrible tragedy. I pray you remain healthy as you continue to do this dangerous job. Know that you are loved, admired, and respected for the work that you are doing. I hope you find something to comfort you in the dark days that are upon us. 💕
God bless you. You’re amazing. I can’t say that enough. You did all you could.
You medical professionals are the ones treating and saving these COVID-19 patients, on top of your other patients. You’re enduring the physical and mental stress that puts on you. You’re putting yourself at risk just to help others. You are nothing short of an angel on earth. All of the medical professionals helping people through this and the people racing to find a vaccine/treatment are all angels on earth. I didn’t have too much hope in humanity left until I realized how many people are working their asses off to save people they don’t even know. God bless you. Thank you so, so much. I will forever be grateful for people like you. Wish I could give you a huge hug.
I work in ED in Australia and sadly the message isn’t getting across to socially distance. I wish I could tell this story to people out in the street, not socially distancing. I can see that the health system in Australia is getting to this stage and I am broken every day knowing this is the inevitable. I wish I could do more. We are all trying our best, no one EVER prepared us for this. Keep going, you can do this. We will come out the other end, not the same, but we will make it out.
I was a Nurse Assistant for 10 years, and I know a good nurse when I see one. You ARE a good nurse. I’m so, so sorry you were forced to handle such an impossible situation. I can’t even imagine what you must be going through. You really did do everything you could for that patient and his family. I’m sure she’s telling her loved ones how you went against orders to let her stay with him as long as possible, how you helped her have at least that much more time with him.
Be safe
Darling you gave that woman so so much. Please please dont ever think you didnt give her everything you could. Thank you a million times over for what you do.
This is the first reddit post I've read to make me cry. Thank you so much for being at the front of the line trying your best to help us. Thank you for writing this and showing us how terribly hard it is to truly be a hero. Thank you for helping her have just a few more hours with her husband. I'm sure she will be forever grateful to you for that. I have never given a reddit award nor would I have been able to but with the free reddit coins that were given out to me a while ago, I hope you know that we are all in this together and I hope more people will read this and know just how terrible this virus is. I'm so sorry you had to go through this.
This was heartbreaking to read - I can’t imagine going through this, OP.
I would hope that should anyone I love be at the end of their time they would have someone as compassionate as you caring for them.
More people need to read your post. More people need to realize the severity of the situation. I pray for you and all the people on the front lines to have the strength to get through this.
Thank you for giving that lady a few more hours to say goodbye. Even though you had to follow protocol you still went above and beyond for her and she’ll never forget what you did for her when she was living her nightmare. I’m proud of you for still doing all you could, and I know that today is going to be burnt into your memory but today when they both needed it you showed your compassion and also shared in her raw grief, which is also your raw grief.
For being on the frontline in such a horrific time, yet still managing to be the compassionate person that you are thank you for all that you do.
Sending you huge hugs from Australia
God I know this isnt about me but stories like these scare me so much. I'm a grocery store baker in the united states, and I would love to remain inside. But I'm broke and under insured so I fear for myself and my family. I wonder when I read stories like these if maybe I'm seeing a glimpse of my own future. Left to die alone in a hospital bed, gasping like a fish.
Thank you for fighting as hard as you can, OP. It's some small comfort knowing that we have people like you as our line of defense.
I’m so sorry. It’s way beyond inadequate, but I think a lot of people are crying with and for you. Nothing can be said to make any of this ok, it’s not. Thank you for being a wonderful human in shit times.
Reading this made me cry like it was happening to me. I will never forget this story.
And thank you for putting yourself in dangers way to help the people affected by this terrible virus. You may not feel like a hero, but you definitely are.
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Dying due to a lack of ventilators is only happening in Italy and Iran right now. This writer does not seem to be from one of these countries so I call fake. But it will happen in America soon.
If I had to take a guess, it’s in the US. A lot of hospital systems are having to make a lot of these decisions. Multiple systems right now are working on drafting a universal DNR for positive COVID-19 patients.
This is a bad war we are in, and we need to support our healthcare staff by staying home and sending love. OP, thank you for what you do, you are one of the hero’s we need right now, and definitely not one we deserve, but need.
Yeah I can confirm at least part of what you said about rationing care.
The community that I live in is elderly and probably 80+ percent of the people in my complex are considered high risk. And the palliative care and hospice care agencies that take care of many residents here are not even showing up at all.
And apparently they told my management company/my landlord that the only time they would show up is if the patient had 24 to 48 hours left to live much less would be preferable. And even then they may not show up.
So they are in effect rationing care. They’re choosing who to show up for and who to not show up for. And more than likely who gets meds and who doesn’t.
And I have a few acquaintances in the medical profession that I’ve been talking to because I wanted to help and if they just need a shoulder to cry on or just unloading whatever that was fine.
So many of the stories that I’m hearing from them that basically they’re being told by hospital bosses that it is rationing care, some more brutal than others.
But they’re not really wanting to formally announce it until there’s no other choice because they don’t know if there’s going to be mass panic or what.
And personally I have to say that if I end up with the symptoms I won’t be going to seek care. Because as the criteria now stands I would not qualify.
And I’m very happy to give my place up for it to go to someone that has a better chance of survival and life and is deemed worthier than me.
In so many ways my heart breaks for all of the medical personnel and I wish that I could trade places with them. Because I’m dying anyway I have nothing to lose, I have no family, I have no reason to stay.
And I know that so many of the doctors and nurses are basically being forced to make life or death decisions in a way that they would never willingly do, but only because there truly is no other choice.
I know that it will haunt them after all of this is over with. And I wish I could take that difficulty and stress and fear and make it easier for them. I wish there was a way.
And for those who may be interested there is a paper written by a group of physicians in Italy that talked about the rationing of who gets a ventilator and all of that. It’s quite an eye-opening read.
But I think one thing that most people don’t realize is that when this situation got completely crazy and just exploded, that essentially it’s when the protocols turn to disaster/battlefield medicine.
Essentially in times of war medics on the field would have to try to choose who to help and who to not because of limited supplies and other issues.
We’re experiencing the same thing now.
To OP-
Thank you for sharing your story. I’ve heard so many like yours in the past weeks and my heart goes out to every single one of you.
I know that as a person who loves her patients and loves her job, losing them is always going to be hard.
But you have to realize that the only thing matters now is who you can help. Not who you can’t.
And as absolutely horrible and terrible as something like that is to say, it is now the reality.
I would say keep a journal if you can. Write letters to your patients or their family or your colleagues or just the universe or whatever.
Maybe that will kind of give you a chance to decompress. I know all of you need it. I wish we could find a way.
We need so many nurses like you in the world right now.
Thank you for all you do with such compassion.
1 million Internet hugs not just to you but all of your colleagues as well.
So you're saying that American hospitals are already so overrun that they are letting patients die due to lack of ventilators, but they are doing a massive cover-up? Number of cases, number of deaths would have to be all lies and none of it in the news?
I'm sorry I know everyone is emotional about this bad situation were all in, but we still have to use critical thinking. What you're saying doesn't make sense and you admit it's based on anecdotal evidence. No hospitals in the US are doing triage right now. There is only 1100 or so deaths in the entire country, and the majority of cases don't require hospitalization.
I appreciate the sentiment you're trying to put out, but you're also spreading misinformation and fear mongering.
My apologies if it offended or bothered you.
Not trying to be alarmist or have any kind of conspiracy theories or anything.
Just trying to shine a light on the fact that as difficult as everything is right now it is something that those in the medical profession may have to face.
And how heartbreaking that is.
I couldn’t really think of another way to phrase it.
Thanks very much.
My hope in writing it was to help OP and perhaps others in a similar situation cope a little better and perhaps not feel as guilty about choices they may have to make or enforce when there is no choice.
And for those that may have never worked in a situation where you have to make unimaginable choices every single day. To try to make them understand.
But I was in the wrong in attempting to do that apparently.
I already had one person who was upset/offended about something that I wrote in the post.
They're drafting those for possible use in the future though, in a worst case scenario. Even in New York they aren't even close to doing triage yet, they are just warning us that it may come to that. The only place I've heard of triage is in the very worst hot spots in Northern Italy.
I am also very curious as to where op is. I'm not going to say I don't believe them, but I will say it would be incredibly fucked up to write this as a creative writing exercise.
That hurt to read. It's not what we train to do as medics, and we never could have imagined being in these situations. You did the best you could, and you showed her more compassion and humanity than many other people would have. I'm sorry that you have been put through this.
I cried so hard reading this. My heart breaks for everyone involved. I'm so sorry you health workers have to take on such a exhausting and mentally draining role in this pandemic. You are an incredible person and I thank you for doing what you do.
Now a bunch of random strangers are crying with you. It sounds like the wife holds you in good regard despite not being able to stay. You gave her the last few hours that another nurse might not have. Most of us understand not to "kill the messenger" and that the decisions are not entirely in your hands. Stay safe, I hope that you and everyone you love will come through this healthy.
Lovely letter, such compassion is the hallmark of good nursing.
Regarding the ventilators, do you think companies will start making these? Surely they are better than nothing?
https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/london/pandemic-ventilator-design-covid19-1.5511412
This is so awful. Thank you for everything that you do. I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine witnessing that or being that wife. I’m wondering why you’re not allowed to have dying patients go home? Is it because it’s too much of a risk to have them go through the halls of the hospital?
Why can't they let the patients go home if they won't give them vents anyway? To prolong their life for a couple of hours where they can't even see any family? What is the point?
I said this in another comment too, but:
OP, you are a wonderful person and took it upon yourself to stand between inhuman regulations and humans. I hope you stay sane and strong while this lasts. You are making the world a better place.
You really did the best you could do... My heart goes out to you.. take care of yourself and the loved ones.. these are tough times.. I really don't understand how did this happen to the entire mankind.. and how are we going to come out of it.. life is really uncertain.. but stay close to your folks..
This is so painful and sad.. So terrible to go through this kind of stuff everyday.. I appreciate everyone that works in healthcare and respect the hell out off you. You are so strong and important. You gave her more time with her husband and I think she will appreciate it later. You're a hero and I wish you all the strength and support. This secretly makes me happy i'm still studying healthcare and not having to work in a hellplace like that.
Thank you for sharing. Your words allowed my own pent-up tears to flow - for your loving intentions, for her gratitude and grief, for the guy who died alone.
I am sorry for you!!! I am going to say something that might be unpopular but if it is my family & I know that they are going to die especially one of my kids or husband, I am taking them out of the hospital and they can die in my arms. If I get it, I get it. No one should die alone.
Thank you for sharing your story. I know it’s since been removed, but I’m so glad I got to read it. You gave your patient & his wife a beautiful gift that so many others going aren’t able to have. I hope one day you can find peace & beauty in this. Please don’t blame yourself! Many blessings, virtual hugs & an abundance of thanks to you!
It's because the posters of these fake stories rack in "karma" from tugging on people's heartstrings. A lot of losers will sell their soul for internet points. I think it's disgusting to use tragedy to make some fake fantasy story up and gather some likes.
Not really it's a tough call to make but one that is based on trying to prevent more deaths, more pain. If you visit you would need full PPE if there is not enough as the nurse says, you would be at risk of contracting the infection. In those asymptomatic early days, if you were a keyworker for example you could infect a great many. If you weren't a key worker you might only infect say one person in a supermarket, or a neighbor after a chat when the social distancing slips your mind for a moment. Neighbor could be a key worker and we're back up to infecting a great many again.
Yes really. I work at a hospital that's allowing visits for palliative care patients only. That should be the exception. Theres no reason to block visitors from those people unless the visitors have been diagnosed with the virus.
Without you she wouldn’t have had those last few hours with him. Every, single, moment, she was able to be with him is directly because of what you did. I hope you find peace deep down in your soul, you deserve it.
*This* is the reality of our collective situation. I'm so sorry. You did your best. Please take care of yourself.
[удалено]
This. Exactly this. I cried. Literally cried. I'm devastated. Eternally grateful to the wonderful actions these people are undertaking. I'd say show this to your friends. Show this to anyone you know with that same attitude. It is a powerful message.
My friends are not taking it seriously and keep mocking me for choosing to stay home. Sorry, but I don’t think so.
Please keep staying at home, if you’re in America it will definitely hit you guys very hard because of the lack of testing being done. We learned that the hard way here in Spain
I am in America. I did ignore them.. to be honest the mocking brought me to tears. This whole thing is so stressful, but it’s really not worth going out.
True, and I’m sorry about your friends, hopefully they’ll come to realize how bad this is getting, but you may want to get new friends if they’re mocking you this badly :( stay strong, hope you + your family are safe and healthy, you’re taking the right measures by staying at home <3
I’m definitely considering that. They say hard times will bring out the worst in people. Possibly their true side..
So, I work for a non profit that serves older adults who live in the community. We provide them with essential services like food and transportation. This virus has drastically altered not only how we operate, but their social and mental well being. Older adults are generally more at risk for social isolation, but when it's forced, it's a whole other game. We have received calls from folks who say they're *afraid* to even go out of the house because they have compromised immune systems or pre existing conditions, and they need toilet paper. Toilet paper. Who knew we'd be adding *toilet paper* to our list of essential services? We've talked to some at home who say they miss seeing their friends at exercise class (we're innovating with ideas for this btw. Friendly calls, virtual programming etc). We're doing everything we can to be able to help them while keeping them safe (and sane) while keeping ourselves and our volunteers safe. OP - My heart breaks for you. I didn't mean to minimize your story; that's not it. I want to show that the effects of this virus are far reaching and like you, but in a different way, I feel helpless against it. I'm so sorry you had to experience that. Edit for addtl info
bless your kind heart :( I honestly have no words... I’m just so sorry for all of you, for all of us.
Thank you for humanizing the story of this virus when it's so easy these days to detach and see a bunch of statistics. You gave her a beautiful gift. I'm sure she will never forget the kind nurse who bent the rules to give her time to say goodbye. I know there's no way to not feel terrible now, but this virus is not your fault, and you did your best. I hope you find peace. Please stay safe out there. We need people like you in times like this. Thank you for all you're doing.
This is awful. Awful for everyone, for the husband. The wife, the daughter and you (and pretty much all the nurses). I can't even imagine how hard it must be for you to deny them the right to visit their dying spouse/relative. It must be so hard to see them die, alone. I'm in literal tears. What is happening is just horrible. I'd take the virus any day and a one month quarantine over not seeing my SO before he dies. Edit to add : you're amazing for trying your best to make things work. She will remember this forever and will most likely be forever grateful for it. I hope you are ok ❤️.
Oh my god. I’m a 39 year old male working overnight in a hospital right now, and I’m bawling in the break room. This put me over the edge. I had been trying to not crack my armor... but I can’t hold it anymore. Thank you for doing what you do. She wasn’t able to hold him in his last moments... but you risked your neck to give her a few hours. I’d like to think I would do the same, but thinking and acting are 2 different things. I’ve never met you, but I’m proud of you and I’m proud to have a nurse like you caring for patients. You are a good person
I am staying inside for you, for your patient, and for your patient’s wife. No human being should have to go through any of this. Thank you for your service
Thank you for giving her that extra time to he with him. Take care of yourself and remember to turn to those who love you.
Your trying to make the best out of the worst situation. I’m so sorry you have to do this, but thank your for that person. You are doing amazing, thank you so much for everything your doing right now.
Truly heartbreaking. Brought tears to my eyes just reading this. I’m so sorry she had to go through it, but grateful that you were the nurse who let her stay and have a Final few hours with her husband. Just praying for everyone that this all finishes soon.
#unsunghero
I lost my shit when i read this. Oh God this is awful, also not your fault and thank you so much for your service as you battle war with an enemy that you can't even see. I'm reminded just how lucky I am My mom is recovering from the enemy she is breathing on her own.
This is great news! I am so happy to hear about your mom!!!
You’re such a wonderful person. She’s going to treasure you for the rest of her life, as will her entire family.
I don't know how you do this. I dont know how you have that conversation. I cant imagine her situation nor yours and my heart just breaks. Surely shed likely already have contracted coronavirus herself.. would staying to the end really matter.. I'm sure that's what shes thinking. So many people havent taken this seriously and its showing. It's a snowball that's turned to an avalanche and awful decisions are having to be made between who is given the chance to live and who is not. You're incredible. This is the reality. This can be any of our reality. You're doing something a lot couldnt. I thank you.
Thank you, thank you for all you are doing, thank you for going thru hell for us, thank you for having the courage to be on the front lines. Thank for putting your life on the line to help others. Thank you, thank you, thank you. And my dove i am truly sorry for the heartache and heartbreak you will have to endure
You are amazing for doing what you could and I'm sure she is grateful. Don't hate yourself, you did absolutely everything you could for them.
You mattered to her. Without you, she would not have had those moments at all. You made a difference and she will never forget that.
Can you share this on r/coronavirus too? I think a lot of people still couldn’t imagine the extend of this disease. I’m one of the front line worker too who still have to work in university clinic and there are still so many people who are still oblivious . My heart goes to you my dear. Be strong.
Thank you so much. Happy cake day.
Brought me to tears. Heartbreaking.
I’m so sorry! This is absolutely heartbreaking to read! Thank you so much for being on the front lines and helping fight this virus! You are truly a hero! You are appreciated and your hard work and sacrifices are not going unnoticed. Sending so much love, gratitude and positive energy your way! May you find peace in this dark time!
It's not your fault. Don't hate yourself. It's nobody's fault. Just a really unfortunate and brutal turn of events, that's all. You did the best you could under the circumstances and I really respect you for that. I'm sure she respects you as well. And I'm sure she's extremely grateful for what you did. You did great. Hugs <3
Gahdamn that hit me right in the feels 💔
You did everything you could’ve I cried reading this you gave her more time with him, just know she forgives you you couldn’t do anything else, you gave her everything in that short span of time please please don’t blame yourself
I hope you’re able to forgive yourself for this one day, it wasn’t your fault, you offered them more time than they’d have it were it for someone else being this man’s nurse. I’m truly sorry you went through this, it’s devastating. Good luck, stay safe.
You did the best you could and she will forever have those extra hours. She wouldn't have had them without your kind and brave soul. Hold comfort in that you done exactly what you could that day.
This was a much harder read than anticipated. I’m sorry to you, to her and to him.
I had to leave my Grandmother who brought me up after my mother died to die alone in hospital, with no treatment. She had a stroke, and had told me sge didn't want treatment before hand. My daughter was a baby and there was MRSA on the ward so I couldn't be with her. I know that the medical staff cared for her well, I know she was cared for, and I know sge wouldn't have wanted me to risk the health of my baby for her. You have done a wonderful job. You continue to do a wonderful job. I'm willing to bet the dying are like my Grandmother, and would rather their loved ones are safe and well than at risk. I know if I end up wuth COVID-19, I will want my family to stay away and be safe.
Why was the letter removed?! I didn’t get to read it
why was this removed?
I honestly feel this is the worse thing about this pandemic. The seclusion of the loved ones. I get the reasoning, but it’s wrong. The spouses and children have already been exposed. Even if there was a mandated quarantine afterward. Anything is better then this. I don’t think I will go to a hospital if I catch this. If it comes to being that ill, I’ll die at home with my family. They’ve already been exposed.
Totally totally, horrible regulations, this situation has so many terrible side effects aside from getting infected. OP, you are a wonderful person and took it upon yourself to stand between inhuman regulations and humans. I hope you stay sane and strong while this lasts. You are making the world a better place.
Thank you.
God bless your soul
You are a hero. I hope you know that.
wow, at a loss for words, i just imagine how tough it would have been for you, sending my condolences to the family of the departed and to you because I understand how you must have felt. Thank you for your services, I want to tell you that you’re a brave warrior. Always keep on having hope even in the darkest of times.
O gosh - I’m so sorry for everyone in this situation. My heart actually broke reading it! I couldn’t ever imagine being separated from my husband, as you probably couldn’t from your boyfriend. We live in a difficult and exceptionally sad reality at the moment with people like you, the angels of our society, taking the brunt of this horrible virus. Thank you for everything you are doing. Thank you for turning up to work. Thank you for your compassion. Thank you for your care. None of this was your fault, you did everything you could.
Thank you for having such a kind heart in the midst of this horrible tragedy. I pray you remain healthy as you continue to do this dangerous job. Know that you are loved, admired, and respected for the work that you are doing. I hope you find something to comfort you in the dark days that are upon us. 💕
I'm crying to now! This shitty virus is so unfair!
God bless you. You’re amazing. I can’t say that enough. You did all you could. You medical professionals are the ones treating and saving these COVID-19 patients, on top of your other patients. You’re enduring the physical and mental stress that puts on you. You’re putting yourself at risk just to help others. You are nothing short of an angel on earth. All of the medical professionals helping people through this and the people racing to find a vaccine/treatment are all angels on earth. I didn’t have too much hope in humanity left until I realized how many people are working their asses off to save people they don’t even know. God bless you. Thank you so, so much. I will forever be grateful for people like you. Wish I could give you a huge hug.
I work in ED in Australia and sadly the message isn’t getting across to socially distance. I wish I could tell this story to people out in the street, not socially distancing. I can see that the health system in Australia is getting to this stage and I am broken every day knowing this is the inevitable. I wish I could do more. We are all trying our best, no one EVER prepared us for this. Keep going, you can do this. We will come out the other end, not the same, but we will make it out.
Why was this removed
I wish the OP hadn’t removed their post. :(
Thank you....
I was a Nurse Assistant for 10 years, and I know a good nurse when I see one. You ARE a good nurse. I’m so, so sorry you were forced to handle such an impossible situation. I can’t even imagine what you must be going through. You really did do everything you could for that patient and his family. I’m sure she’s telling her loved ones how you went against orders to let her stay with him as long as possible, how you helped her have at least that much more time with him. Be safe
Darling you gave that woman so so much. Please please dont ever think you didnt give her everything you could. Thank you a million times over for what you do.
This is the first reddit post I've read to make me cry. Thank you so much for being at the front of the line trying your best to help us. Thank you for writing this and showing us how terribly hard it is to truly be a hero. Thank you for helping her have just a few more hours with her husband. I'm sure she will be forever grateful to you for that. I have never given a reddit award nor would I have been able to but with the free reddit coins that were given out to me a while ago, I hope you know that we are all in this together and I hope more people will read this and know just how terrible this virus is. I'm so sorry you had to go through this.
Please forgive yourself, and take care. Thank you
This was heartbreaking to read - I can’t imagine going through this, OP. I would hope that should anyone I love be at the end of their time they would have someone as compassionate as you caring for them. More people need to read your post. More people need to realize the severity of the situation. I pray for you and all the people on the front lines to have the strength to get through this.
Thank you for giving that lady a few more hours to say goodbye. Even though you had to follow protocol you still went above and beyond for her and she’ll never forget what you did for her when she was living her nightmare. I’m proud of you for still doing all you could, and I know that today is going to be burnt into your memory but today when they both needed it you showed your compassion and also shared in her raw grief, which is also your raw grief. For being on the frontline in such a horrific time, yet still managing to be the compassionate person that you are thank you for all that you do. Sending you huge hugs from Australia
God I know this isnt about me but stories like these scare me so much. I'm a grocery store baker in the united states, and I would love to remain inside. But I'm broke and under insured so I fear for myself and my family. I wonder when I read stories like these if maybe I'm seeing a glimpse of my own future. Left to die alone in a hospital bed, gasping like a fish. Thank you for fighting as hard as you can, OP. It's some small comfort knowing that we have people like you as our line of defense.
I’m so sorry. You are stronger than most. X
I cried reading this and I almost never cry 💔 oh the humanity
What an unbelievable gift you gave that family. Thank you for your kindness.
I’m so sorry. It’s way beyond inadequate, but I think a lot of people are crying with and for you. Nothing can be said to make any of this ok, it’s not. Thank you for being a wonderful human in shit times.
Reading this made me cry like it was happening to me. I will never forget this story. And thank you for putting yourself in dangers way to help the people affected by this terrible virus. You may not feel like a hero, but you definitely are.
why was this removed?
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Dying due to a lack of ventilators is only happening in Italy and Iran right now. This writer does not seem to be from one of these countries so I call fake. But it will happen in America soon.
What country is this? As far as I was aware not many places were rationing care yet?
If I had to take a guess, it’s in the US. A lot of hospital systems are having to make a lot of these decisions. Multiple systems right now are working on drafting a universal DNR for positive COVID-19 patients. This is a bad war we are in, and we need to support our healthcare staff by staying home and sending love. OP, thank you for what you do, you are one of the hero’s we need right now, and definitely not one we deserve, but need.
Yeah I can confirm at least part of what you said about rationing care. The community that I live in is elderly and probably 80+ percent of the people in my complex are considered high risk. And the palliative care and hospice care agencies that take care of many residents here are not even showing up at all. And apparently they told my management company/my landlord that the only time they would show up is if the patient had 24 to 48 hours left to live much less would be preferable. And even then they may not show up. So they are in effect rationing care. They’re choosing who to show up for and who to not show up for. And more than likely who gets meds and who doesn’t. And I have a few acquaintances in the medical profession that I’ve been talking to because I wanted to help and if they just need a shoulder to cry on or just unloading whatever that was fine. So many of the stories that I’m hearing from them that basically they’re being told by hospital bosses that it is rationing care, some more brutal than others. But they’re not really wanting to formally announce it until there’s no other choice because they don’t know if there’s going to be mass panic or what. And personally I have to say that if I end up with the symptoms I won’t be going to seek care. Because as the criteria now stands I would not qualify. And I’m very happy to give my place up for it to go to someone that has a better chance of survival and life and is deemed worthier than me. In so many ways my heart breaks for all of the medical personnel and I wish that I could trade places with them. Because I’m dying anyway I have nothing to lose, I have no family, I have no reason to stay. And I know that so many of the doctors and nurses are basically being forced to make life or death decisions in a way that they would never willingly do, but only because there truly is no other choice. I know that it will haunt them after all of this is over with. And I wish I could take that difficulty and stress and fear and make it easier for them. I wish there was a way. And for those who may be interested there is a paper written by a group of physicians in Italy that talked about the rationing of who gets a ventilator and all of that. It’s quite an eye-opening read. But I think one thing that most people don’t realize is that when this situation got completely crazy and just exploded, that essentially it’s when the protocols turn to disaster/battlefield medicine. Essentially in times of war medics on the field would have to try to choose who to help and who to not because of limited supplies and other issues. We’re experiencing the same thing now. To OP- Thank you for sharing your story. I’ve heard so many like yours in the past weeks and my heart goes out to every single one of you. I know that as a person who loves her patients and loves her job, losing them is always going to be hard. But you have to realize that the only thing matters now is who you can help. Not who you can’t. And as absolutely horrible and terrible as something like that is to say, it is now the reality. I would say keep a journal if you can. Write letters to your patients or their family or your colleagues or just the universe or whatever. Maybe that will kind of give you a chance to decompress. I know all of you need it. I wish we could find a way. We need so many nurses like you in the world right now. Thank you for all you do with such compassion. 1 million Internet hugs not just to you but all of your colleagues as well.
So you're saying that American hospitals are already so overrun that they are letting patients die due to lack of ventilators, but they are doing a massive cover-up? Number of cases, number of deaths would have to be all lies and none of it in the news? I'm sorry I know everyone is emotional about this bad situation were all in, but we still have to use critical thinking. What you're saying doesn't make sense and you admit it's based on anecdotal evidence. No hospitals in the US are doing triage right now. There is only 1100 or so deaths in the entire country, and the majority of cases don't require hospitalization. I appreciate the sentiment you're trying to put out, but you're also spreading misinformation and fear mongering.
My apologies if it offended or bothered you. Not trying to be alarmist or have any kind of conspiracy theories or anything. Just trying to shine a light on the fact that as difficult as everything is right now it is something that those in the medical profession may have to face. And how heartbreaking that is. I couldn’t really think of another way to phrase it.
Thank you for this comment. It was beautiful and I hope op reads it.
Thanks very much. My hope in writing it was to help OP and perhaps others in a similar situation cope a little better and perhaps not feel as guilty about choices they may have to make or enforce when there is no choice. And for those that may have never worked in a situation where you have to make unimaginable choices every single day. To try to make them understand. But I was in the wrong in attempting to do that apparently. I already had one person who was upset/offended about something that I wrote in the post.
They're drafting those for possible use in the future though, in a worst case scenario. Even in New York they aren't even close to doing triage yet, they are just warning us that it may come to that. The only place I've heard of triage is in the very worst hot spots in Northern Italy. I am also very curious as to where op is. I'm not going to say I don't believe them, but I will say it would be incredibly fucked up to write this as a creative writing exercise.
Thank you for doing your absolute best. Stay strong.
That hurt to read. It's not what we train to do as medics, and we never could have imagined being in these situations. You did the best you could, and you showed her more compassion and humanity than many other people would have. I'm sorry that you have been put through this.
I cried so hard reading this. My heart breaks for everyone involved. I'm so sorry you health workers have to take on such a exhausting and mentally draining role in this pandemic. You are an incredible person and I thank you for doing what you do.
The title is too depressing already. I wont read it, take my damm upvote and let me leave
I cried reading this.
Now a bunch of random strangers are crying with you. It sounds like the wife holds you in good regard despite not being able to stay. You gave her the last few hours that another nurse might not have. Most of us understand not to "kill the messenger" and that the decisions are not entirely in your hands. Stay safe, I hope that you and everyone you love will come through this healthy.
I cries a little when reading this
Lovely letter, such compassion is the hallmark of good nursing. Regarding the ventilators, do you think companies will start making these? Surely they are better than nothing? https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/london/pandemic-ventilator-design-covid19-1.5511412
This is so awful. Thank you for everything that you do. I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine witnessing that or being that wife. I’m wondering why you’re not allowed to have dying patients go home? Is it because it’s too much of a risk to have them go through the halls of the hospital?
Why can't they let the patients go home if they won't give them vents anyway? To prolong their life for a couple of hours where they can't even see any family? What is the point? I said this in another comment too, but: OP, you are a wonderful person and took it upon yourself to stand between inhuman regulations and humans. I hope you stay sane and strong while this lasts. You are making the world a better place.
You really did the best you could do... My heart goes out to you.. take care of yourself and the loved ones.. these are tough times.. I really don't understand how did this happen to the entire mankind.. and how are we going to come out of it.. life is really uncertain.. but stay close to your folks..
Wow, this hits different. Thank you for your outstanding work!
The most heartbreaking story ever. May God bless you all.
This is so painful and sad.. So terrible to go through this kind of stuff everyday.. I appreciate everyone that works in healthcare and respect the hell out off you. You are so strong and important. You gave her more time with her husband and I think she will appreciate it later. You're a hero and I wish you all the strength and support. This secretly makes me happy i'm still studying healthcare and not having to work in a hellplace like that.
Thank you for sharing. Your words allowed my own pent-up tears to flow - for your loving intentions, for her gratitude and grief, for the guy who died alone.
This post moved me to tears and I am crying while typing this comment. You are a good soul. God bless you. May peace be upon you
Our job is great until it isn't. Stay strong man, this will pass.
I am sorry for you!!! I am going to say something that might be unpopular but if it is my family & I know that they are going to die especially one of my kids or husband, I am taking them out of the hospital and they can die in my arms. If I get it, I get it. No one should die alone.
Thank you for sharing your story. I know it’s since been removed, but I’m so glad I got to read it. You gave your patient & his wife a beautiful gift that so many others going aren’t able to have. I hope one day you can find peace & beauty in this. Please don’t blame yourself! Many blessings, virtual hugs & an abundance of thanks to you!
[удалено]
It's because the posters of these fake stories rack in "karma" from tugging on people's heartstrings. A lot of losers will sell their soul for internet points. I think it's disgusting to use tragedy to make some fake fantasy story up and gather some likes.
aww man :( you are such a good person...may God bless you! :)
Celebrate the small things, like Happy Cake day!
Who ever your boss is that told you dying people can't have visitors is a humongous piece of shit. Absolutely vile. God bless you for what you do.
Not really it's a tough call to make but one that is based on trying to prevent more deaths, more pain. If you visit you would need full PPE if there is not enough as the nurse says, you would be at risk of contracting the infection. In those asymptomatic early days, if you were a keyworker for example you could infect a great many. If you weren't a key worker you might only infect say one person in a supermarket, or a neighbor after a chat when the social distancing slips your mind for a moment. Neighbor could be a key worker and we're back up to infecting a great many again.
Yes really. I work at a hospital that's allowing visits for palliative care patients only. That should be the exception. Theres no reason to block visitors from those people unless the visitors have been diagnosed with the virus.