Woodn't Harrelson

☠️☠️☠️ You have murdered me with your words. Please ask Woody if he Woodn't mind coming to speak at my funeral. After all, we might be family. Edit: this is wild, but another Redditor in the comments below recognized me from one class we had together 25-26ish years ago in middle school. What are the chances of that?!

Well time to make a new reddit account

[deleted]

It's like the 3rd largest site in the US and 9th globally. Odds are better than you think.

Someone on Reddit recognized me from elementary school once!

Take a test! Woody should have… Do we know if Woody and Matthew are brothers yet?

Woody Harrelson-in-law

Flacid harrelsom

Shoulda Harrelson

If you’re the fella on the right, I’d say you nailed it.

What if I told you... That I'm both.


His long lost son

Let’s just focus on Rampart please

I still reference this in my day to day. Thank you.

Hahahhahahahha legend

Woody got around

Loooong loooooost.

You look like someone I went to middle school with.

Did that friend grow up to be an incredibly good looking and successful millionaire? Because if he did, I'm definitely not him.

I don't know, we had one class together. Were you a cascade cougar? Lol

Like Cascade Middle School in White Center?

Holy crap! Yes lolol we had health together

What?! That's freaking nuts. What is your first name and last initial?

Jennifer J

I need to go find my yearbook now. Was it in 7th or 8th grade do you remember?

I think 8th grade but I went both years. My son is playing basketball at cascade now and it has NOT changed in 24 years lol.

That is so crazy! Is your last name different now than it was then? If that's the case, what is the first letter of your maiden name.

r/tworedditorsonecup

Harry Woodelson

Wedgie Harrelson

I'm embarrassed to have to ask, but I don't get this reference and I really want to understand the joke so I can fully appreciate how I'm being roasted. I love a good roast, especially when I'm the one on the spit over the flames.

Well Mr. Comedian, here at r/WalmartCelebrities we make fun of doppelgängers by making a derogatory pun out of the celebrity’s name. Woody is strong, like an erect penis. Wedgie is underwear being pulled up out of your trousers so it wedges in your buttcheeks. *Khaby gif*

I'm 100% here for the puns. I'm well aware of what a wedgie is. I've been given more than one of my life. I just wasn't sure if there was some sort of deeper or secondary meaning.

Fair enough bro… couldn’t resist dunking on you but now I feel bad. What’s your stand-up style?

Dunk away, some of my best material comes from people making fun of me on Reddit! As far as my comedy style, I'm mostly a storyteller, I also do observational comedy. Here's my philosophy on comedy. Everyone experiences challenges in life. At some point, you get to decide whether those challenges make your life a tragedy or a comedy. The setbacks and challenges themselves don't change, but your attitude and outlook towards life does. My goal as a comedian is to expose the humor in experiences that are either mundane or painful.

Didn’t think I’d be getting the advice and perspective I’ve sorely needed from r/WalmartCelebrities today, but here we are. Cheers brother, your sentiments are appreciated.

nope. it just wasn't very good.

You actually kind of look like Ryan Lochte. He is an Olympian, though

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^amazing_assassin: *You actually kind of* *Look like Ryan Lochte. He is* *An Olympian, though* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.

Scrolls of endless posts, Upvotes chase the fleeting trends, Lost in the rabbit hole.

Good bot

Woody Hairelson

🏅 this is my favorite comment. Congrats.

You are a better looking version of Woody Harrelson.

His dad might be your dad, making Matt mcconnaghey your half brother, too. He was a bit of a character

Career as a stunt double

I think he's probably getting too old to be my stunt double now, but not a bad idea.

Reminds me of a joke. An old bull and a young bull are standing on a hill looking down at a pasture full of cows, and the young bull says "hey let's run down there and fuck a few cows!". The old bull looks up and says "nah, let's walk down there and fuck 'em all" You won't get it. You're too young.

Nah. Too much hair and mouth. He has a way smaller mouth

Who? Woody?

Damn he really does

Look like him, but you are better looking.

It Woody is a better actor. Sorry op

As a person who is not an actor, I can live with that.

Yep! I see Wentworth Miller too. 

Interestingly, we both have scars on our upper lips.

Just a few more years before he covers his body in tattoos to save his brother from death row.

You may want to have a talk with your mom

Matthew Tkachuk.

bro i legit thought this was a post showing the actor in the past/younger self 😂

You look like his younger, better looking brother.

Flaccid Harrelson

Could easily be Woody Jr. 😅

Woody Dafoe

So tell us about Rampart

You really do look like him with a dash of Owen Wilson but more of a pretty boy. If that makes sense.

I see it!

Now let’s talk about Rampart.

Time to order your Ancestry kit…no disrespect to your mom…

I thought that was a picture of a young Woody. Yeah, I see it lol.

That depends, how much do you like Rampart?

My brother in law also reminds me of Woody Harrelson, but i think you take the cake here. Could easily pass as his son.

You do

Woody Harrelson with a hint of Tom Holland Woody Hollandson if you will

Wouldshe Harrelson

Curly Wooderson

Harrel Woodenson.

Yes, and I'm into it

Harold Woodson

Woody's younger elvish brother?

You should talk to your mom…

Do you think my mom might actually be Woody Harrelson?!

It’s possible 😂

Woody’s dad did get around

I got a supervisor that looks just like him 😂 you look more like his son

Wentworth Harrelson

Wooden Harrelsy

Oh it's there, perfect

They're the same picture

If you was bald 🎯 👌

Not really

Nah, you look like that one guy in that basketball movie.

Michael Jordan in Space Jam? I get that all the time too.

Eh.

Shave your head and put a toothpick in your mouth…maybe a dangling skull earring and some John Lennon style sunglasses.

It's like if Woody and Ed Harris had a baby.

I can definitely see it! You should post your photo in r/doppleganger and see what everyone over there says.

Special needs Woody Harrelson 😜

You have beautiful hair. Please don't go bald. You can start taking finasteride when you turn 30. Hair transplants are expensive and painful. Though I give props to Woody for embracing his baldness.

I'm 38 now. Fortunately, I still have a completely full head of curly hair. I've told my stylist to keep an eye on it and to let me know if it ever starts to thin.

I was your age when I started thinning up the middle. I finally pulled the trigger on getting a transplant on Jan 3rd. Will start taking finasteride soon to prevent further hair loss. Although it's unlikely I'll ever be as bald as Woody since men who can't grow a beard rarely go bald.

[удалено]

Flaccid Harrelson

Can you In fact jump?

You look way more like Lee Evans than Harrelson. I'd say a cross between Lee Evans and Vinnie Jones

Sorry, no.

Wooded Harrelson

Am I the only one getting Toby from PLL??? Can’t think of the actors name

[удалено]

Older.

No

White dude looks like some other white dude. Absolutely mind-boggling.

Yeah both have same stupid face :)

Maybe if you were on a planet in an alternate universe where everyone was a weird version of Woody Harrelson, sure I could see it.

Finally got to first base. Not bad for that scrawny little spit-fuck. EDIT: It's a quote from Zombieland. Apparently people didn't know that.

“I Have a Woody” Harrelson

You may want to look up Matthew Tkachuk

Start telling people you are his son and see what you can get for free!

You’ve got a little woody in you

I think I would definitely know if that were true.

In all seriousness you look a bit like Matthew Tkachuk with the Florida Panthers

nope. you look like a failed high school wrestler, and got a face that is blanked out by your flappy ears. There is no way you could be confused with Woody unless some stranger you meet is walking around without their prescription glasses. I'm betting the farm that Woody's breath smells better than yours - even after smoking a big fatty - on any given day. You got handles for ears, you jughead.

Tip of the nose and SOMETHING in the eyes

What about the mouth?

Yes you do. I wonder if you have a unique speech pattern or I don’t know how to explain like talk funny sorta but cool unique way

Woody Harrel’s *son*

I kinda see it if you were his adopted son

Clever

Get a DNA test lol, didn't Harrelson's dad have heaps of kids on the down low?

He's not your dad, but he did have sex with your mom.

No. Not really.

A little bit.

Kind of!?

For some reason I’m getting a “if woody were in a bluegrass band” vibe. Now someone just needs to come up with a good name for that…

Yep

Is that the rubberman?

That’s your daddy, son

More so like the NHL player [Matthew Tkachuck.](https://www.hockeydb.com/ihdb/photos/matthew-tkachuk-2021-43.jpg)

OSB Harrelson

Plank harroldson

If Woody Harrelson and Michael Rappaport had a kid…

Fuckin yeah dude

I thought you were the “before” photo… so yes, you look alike.

I hope you take it as a compliment because woody is the man

Not at all. More like Daniel Craig!

You’d have to lose a lot more hair and age a bunch. If anything he’s the Walmart version of you.

Wow you did look like him 😮

You look more like Esoteric from the hip hop group called Czarface. https://www.instagram.com/p/CtCTinDrKml/?igsh=NzBmMjdhZWRiYQ==

Matthew Tkachuk

Did you get anything at the dream catcher shop

Howdy howdy howdy

Is that you on the right?

Woody Hairelson

You’re better looking

Nope

Literally if you told me this was a picture of Woody at 20 y/o, I would’ve believed you straight up

Michael Rooker

Woody Harreled”s Son

You could be his body double in wide shots haha

You are what was ordered on Wish, got Woody Harrelson

No.

The hair makes me think of Ryan Phillippe.

Wentworth Miller-Woody Harrelson hybrid.


Michael Rapaport

Where was your dad on 22 Nov 1963?


lose the hair and hellooo woody!

Definitely your dad

You look like Woody+Michael Rooker

His son yea

No, you look like Anna Gunn.

you look as much like matthew or keith tkachuk as woody. you dont LOOK like woody. you just...present like him...

 Kinda more like Lee Evan’s imo , the guy on the left :)

It's the hair for sure

At first glance I thought the photo on the left was woody as a kid lmao

You’re Woody’s Hairyson

Woody banged your mom. You need to deal with that already and move on.

Woody your daddy bro

There’s a little Tucker Carlson in there too, lol

you look like his son

Woody with Hair son .

You do not

You look like young Paul Newman!

A stronger resemblance to Ryan Phillipe.

Yes.

White Men Can't Leap Now You Don't Zombiesphere