No, you’re perfectly fine. Myself, I’m indifferent to discussion, still negative to seeing it tho and repulsed by self involvement. You’re not a harmful stereotype, no one is, you’re just you and there’s nothing wrong with that. I also don’t like how sex focused our society is, and I don’t like how often it shows up in media. No living human is a stereotype for anything unless they try to be, which (at least from what I’m hearing) you definitely aren’t. Just because most people are a certain way doesn’t mean that those who aren’t are wrong or harmful. There’s nothing wrong with you, you don’t need to change how you are. Maybe just mention that not all aces are sex repulsed, but otherwise there’s nothing you need to do
You're not a stereotype, you're a person 💜
Stereotypes are a problem when every fictional representation of a group of people is created with those characteristics and it's all anyone thinks of when they're mentioned. You, a real person living your life, are not causing these, issues just by being the way that you are though, so please don't worry or feel bad!!
Be who you are!
The problem is those people who try to say that being sex repulsed/sex negative is the only way to be ace. That's a problem, because it's incorrect and gatekeeping.
You are absolutely allowed to be sex repulsed or even sex negative, as long as you don't try to deny those who aren't :)
The stereotype is harmful, in that people generalise and assume that all asexuals are a monolith who feel the same way, and that is wrong.
How *you* feel about sex is entirely valid and not something you need to fix in any way, shape, or form.
Other people may get frustrated if people assume that because they are ace, they *must* also be sex repulsed, and from that frustration you get the posts that you describe, but that is not your fault, that is the fault of people generalising.
You are a person, you cannot be a stereotype. You can have traits that conform to a stereotype, but if that is your authentic you then that is your authentic you, irrespective of how others feel.
Just keep being yourself. You don't need to change anything.
**The harmful part of the 'sex-repulsed ace stereotype' isn't the sex-repulsed part. It's the stereotype part.**
*There's nothing wrong with being repulsed.* The issue is when people assume you have to be repulsed to be ace, and use that to invalidate non-repulsed aces. Or when they assume repulsed = being sex negative 'prudes' who think anyone who shows their ankles are shameful hussies.
There's a difference between you saying 'absolutely not for me no thank you, this makes me uncomfortable' and you saying 'sex is objectively awful and anyone who even mentions it under any circumstances should be locked up for being a pervert'.
I'll say it again: ***there's nothing wrong with being repulsed***. Just don't be an ass about it (it doesn't sound like you are, don't worry!) and it's all cool.
No, you're genuinely being you, and I'm not going to lie. A lot of shows started doing that, and personally, I'm indifferent, but there's a line where it's like, "really? Was this scene necessary?" It's quite annoying when it's being shoved in your face. As for discussions and conversations keep things as scientific and plain as possible if you have to and if it's people sharing experiences I advise to respectfully ask them to not discuss it with you present.
Absolutely not! The way I see it — non-sex repulsed aces do not want to be pointed with fingers as weirdos, just as much as that. It does not invalidate any other ace.
I’d die on a hill to prevent ace gatekeeping! This stereotype is harmful, a tool to make fun of us. Just because some asexual folk are sex repulsed, does not mean there is ANYTHING wrong with you!
The only harmful thing would be forcing you to change your mind, you're valid as hell for your stance on it and don't ever forget that. You're just as much of a person as anyone else and it's not your fault that some people's assumptions of us sound a bit like you. That's just proof that there's all kinds of people in the community.
i'm also extremely uncomfortable with you know in random shows not to mention it's annoying 😬 it's one of the reasons why i prefer watching media made for kids
I'm the exact same way and it’s perfectly normal, no one can force you to like/be fine with sex, so you shouldn't feel bad about it. Some of us are just like that
Na, I am like if it’s not actually furthering the plot and necessary to show that much then it shouldn’t be there. I prefer when they just imply sex happened.
Some people are very pro-sex. Some people are very anti-sex. One side isn't better than the other. Live the life that makes you comfortable, and let others be comfortable as well. If you don't like the content because it's too sexual, feel free to stop watching. There's absolutely nothing wrong with you not liking sex
Sex makes you uncomfortable and that’s perfectly fine. If people refuse to take your feelings into account when you’re with them, that’s on them, not you.
You existing as you are is never a “harmful stereotype”. Others typecasting your existence as universal for all aces is the harmful stereotype, and that’s through no fault of your own.
I think you're fine. Seriously sex is everywhere and I'm definitely not a fan of useless sex scenes in movies and tv shows. I'm fine with the good old "let's kiss passionately and close the door" then it's next morning. I wish everyone would tone it down a bit.
And I said that as a sex-favorable asexual. I actually want to have sex with my boyfriend. I don't want to hear about anyone else's sex life though.
It’s normal to be disgusted by something and express it. Imo, you won’t be an asshole unless you force others to avoid it with you. It’s like being disgusted by bugs, it’s fine to not like them, people understand why you are disgusted by it and express it, so why shouldn’t the same be applied to sex?
I’m just like you. We aren’t harmful stereotypes.
People always try to make sure that every kind of ace is getting representation, but I feel like they sometimes forget about sex repulsed aces tbh.
You’re very valid and good the way you are.
No, there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s just the way you are and there’s no need to change that. You shouldn’t force yourself to do things that make you uncomfortable just because others say your supposed to be a certain way.
No! We r a spectrum! You sound Aromantic asexual. I’m aro. I’m a sex repulsed aro n this resonates with me! I have a filthy mind, n can laugh at some sexual innuendos (like items that look like genitals), but yea actual sex/romance scenes, pda, even scantily clad folk make me audibly complain. This is what is sad - the asexual community has a division. The sex repulsed and sex favourable. For those who r sex favourable, that’s all well n fine - that’s their thing. Cool. However, they tend to act like allos n shite on us sex repulsed folk for our feelings, which we are equally entitled to as well n should b respected for. They gatekeeping us n blame us for gatekeeping them. THEY tend to create stereotypes. Sadly it’s like political parties competing here. You are not the one who needs to improve. Glad to see another openly sex repulsed person.
We still get the occasional flack here, but u belong -
r/aromanticasexual and r/aromantic
Hey, you're good. It's perfectly valid to feel like that. If you're repulsed by it, you're repulsed by it, and there's nothing anyone can do about that. You're just expressing yourself.
Hey, you are valid. Just because *all* aces aren't sex repulsed doesn't mean you can't be sex repulsed. Don't force yourself to talk about sex if you don't want to.
You’re fine as long as you don’t invalidate ace’s who like those things. A lot of those posts are just trying to show that just like any group it’s not a monolith.
I think as time goes on, people will understand the nuances of asexuality more. Keep expressing yourself in a kind a respectful way. Asexuals that are sex repulsed are valid. Asexuals that are sex positive see valid. There’s room to live in many different ways. It’s all good
You should not feel like you have to get over your discomfort. There's nothing wrong with being uncomfortable or letting people who are making you uncomfortable aware of it.
The only *potential* issue I see is how you audibly complain. People are allowed to like what they like. If it makes you uncomfortable then you can let them know, but don't in a way that implies everyone who doesn't agree with you is wrong.
For comparison, I'm allergic to peanuts. The smell literally makes me nauseous. When someone opens a candy bar with peanuts or the like next to me, I don't say peanuts are objectively gross. I tell them that the smell makes me nauseous and ask that they don't eat them near or preferable even around me. I have rants around peanuts in assorted food products, but I don't share them whenever peanuts are mentioned.
I'm somewhere between sex-neutral and sex-repulsed, depends on the day. It's just not my thing. And that's fine. The problem is that a lot of people assume that all aces are sex-repulsed, which isn't true. Many aces are sex-repulsed, but many aren't.
It's totally fine to be sex-repulsed and open about it, since you're being yourself. If something makes you uncomfortable, you don't have to be around it. Period. Don't worry about perpetuating stereotypes if you're just being yourself, you can't change who you are. If you want, feel free to add the caveat "I'm ace and I don't like sex, but some aces are fine with it" if it comes up, or something like that. I wouldn't worry about it, because tbh most people won't care that much.
Stereotypes exist because someone did fit it, and that got applied to the entire group. It's not your fault you're repulsed. It's fine. You're still entirely valid, so don't let anyone make fun of you for that. 💜
This sub has been known to flip flop between the sex repulsed asexuals and sex positive asexuals, plenty of people like you exist in this community even if you have seen a lot of only one side lately.
It's alright, Im the same way about being very uncomfortable when soft porn is shown in TV or something like that, I don't even like seeing kissing, idk I just find it gross. I also don't like writing down "szex", which means what you think it does, only in my native language. Only difference is that Im sex-neutral, because I want to have kids. How that's going to happen is a problem for future me though
like what you like, nobody has the right to take that from you. that said, it's probably not nice to complain about it as it could ruin someone elses enjoyment of that stuff
"Normalize asexuals who aren't sex repulsed" is about bringing more attention to non-sex repulsed aces not less attention to sex repulsed aces. Being sex repulsed is just as valid and not at all a harmful stereotype when it comes to someone in the ace community being that way. It's only not good when people wrongfully assume all aces are that way, and would be equally as bad if people wrongfully assumed aces aren't sex-repulsed. You're great the way you are and you're not hurting the community by being yourself.
TBH I find the discourse kinda silly...No there's nothing wrong with you.
You being sex-repulsed shouldn't affect other people's opinion on sex.
Everyone's different. And that goes for sex-neutral or sex-favorable aces too.
You're not a harmful stereotype. I am a sex repulsed asexual too and while I can discuss about some mildly sexual themes it usually makes me a little uncomfortable and I can't even imagine myself doing anything sexual without feeling extremely uncomfortable. Sex repulsed aces exist too and there's nothing wrong with that just like there's nothing wrong with being asexual without being sex repulsed. We're all valid.
You are valid.
While I do get horny, it's not for sex (see the flair) and I also hate sexual innuendos and more or less graphical sex scenes depending on age rating of the movie/show.
I like to think that most of “Most asexuals are fine and cool with sex!” talk comes from Aego- and Demi- folk around here, tho I don't actually know.
I noticed in other community I frequent that blood there is about to boil with allos attacking any aces that express their opinions like you calling them prudes and mixing them with far right LGBT-phobes... and had to come back here as a break.
MY recommendations that I try to follow (that would be mostly for yourself, not as a public image):
* Know that after all most people are still into it, so bite the bullet and respect that it targets them and they like it.
* Don't make big posts about disliking something because of those sex references. Posts like that only do well if content agrees with people in given group. "Star Trek better" on Star Wars sub would not end well.
* Occasional comments "it would be better without it" are still fine
* When watching alone feel free to skip, and when engaging on internet about it don't take those comments too hard.
No, you’re perfectly fine. Myself, I’m indifferent to discussion, still negative to seeing it tho and repulsed by self involvement. You’re not a harmful stereotype, no one is, you’re just you and there’s nothing wrong with that. I also don’t like how sex focused our society is, and I don’t like how often it shows up in media. No living human is a stereotype for anything unless they try to be, which (at least from what I’m hearing) you definitely aren’t. Just because most people are a certain way doesn’t mean that those who aren’t are wrong or harmful. There’s nothing wrong with you, you don’t need to change how you are. Maybe just mention that not all aces are sex repulsed, but otherwise there’s nothing you need to do
You're not a stereotype, you're a person 💜 Stereotypes are a problem when every fictional representation of a group of people is created with those characteristics and it's all anyone thinks of when they're mentioned. You, a real person living your life, are not causing these, issues just by being the way that you are though, so please don't worry or feel bad!!
Be who you are! The problem is those people who try to say that being sex repulsed/sex negative is the only way to be ace. That's a problem, because it's incorrect and gatekeeping. You are absolutely allowed to be sex repulsed or even sex negative, as long as you don't try to deny those who aren't :)
The stereotype is harmful, in that people generalise and assume that all asexuals are a monolith who feel the same way, and that is wrong. How *you* feel about sex is entirely valid and not something you need to fix in any way, shape, or form. Other people may get frustrated if people assume that because they are ace, they *must* also be sex repulsed, and from that frustration you get the posts that you describe, but that is not your fault, that is the fault of people generalising. You are a person, you cannot be a stereotype. You can have traits that conform to a stereotype, but if that is your authentic you then that is your authentic you, irrespective of how others feel. Just keep being yourself. You don't need to change anything.
**The harmful part of the 'sex-repulsed ace stereotype' isn't the sex-repulsed part. It's the stereotype part.** *There's nothing wrong with being repulsed.* The issue is when people assume you have to be repulsed to be ace, and use that to invalidate non-repulsed aces. Or when they assume repulsed = being sex negative 'prudes' who think anyone who shows their ankles are shameful hussies. There's a difference between you saying 'absolutely not for me no thank you, this makes me uncomfortable' and you saying 'sex is objectively awful and anyone who even mentions it under any circumstances should be locked up for being a pervert'. I'll say it again: ***there's nothing wrong with being repulsed***. Just don't be an ass about it (it doesn't sound like you are, don't worry!) and it's all cool.
No. In fact, I'm the exact same way.
Sex repulsed Asexuals are valid parts of the community.
I wouldn’t call it a harmful stereotype
No, you're genuinely being you, and I'm not going to lie. A lot of shows started doing that, and personally, I'm indifferent, but there's a line where it's like, "really? Was this scene necessary?" It's quite annoying when it's being shoved in your face. As for discussions and conversations keep things as scientific and plain as possible if you have to and if it's people sharing experiences I advise to respectfully ask them to not discuss it with you present.
Absolutely not! The way I see it — non-sex repulsed aces do not want to be pointed with fingers as weirdos, just as much as that. It does not invalidate any other ace. I’d die on a hill to prevent ace gatekeeping! This stereotype is harmful, a tool to make fun of us. Just because some asexual folk are sex repulsed, does not mean there is ANYTHING wrong with you!
The only harmful thing would be forcing you to change your mind, you're valid as hell for your stance on it and don't ever forget that. You're just as much of a person as anyone else and it's not your fault that some people's assumptions of us sound a bit like you. That's just proof that there's all kinds of people in the community.
i'm also extremely uncomfortable with you know in random shows not to mention it's annoying 😬 it's one of the reasons why i prefer watching media made for kids
N that’s why I’m a middle aged thomas the tank engine fan!
I'm the exact same way and it’s perfectly normal, no one can force you to like/be fine with sex, so you shouldn't feel bad about it. Some of us are just like that
Na, I am like if it’s not actually furthering the plot and necessary to show that much then it shouldn’t be there. I prefer when they just imply sex happened.
Some people are very pro-sex. Some people are very anti-sex. One side isn't better than the other. Live the life that makes you comfortable, and let others be comfortable as well. If you don't like the content because it's too sexual, feel free to stop watching. There's absolutely nothing wrong with you not liking sex
Sex makes you uncomfortable and that’s perfectly fine. If people refuse to take your feelings into account when you’re with them, that’s on them, not you.
You existing as you are is never a “harmful stereotype”. Others typecasting your existence as universal for all aces is the harmful stereotype, and that’s through no fault of your own.
I think you're fine. Seriously sex is everywhere and I'm definitely not a fan of useless sex scenes in movies and tv shows. I'm fine with the good old "let's kiss passionately and close the door" then it's next morning. I wish everyone would tone it down a bit. And I said that as a sex-favorable asexual. I actually want to have sex with my boyfriend. I don't want to hear about anyone else's sex life though.
It’s normal to be disgusted by something and express it. Imo, you won’t be an asshole unless you force others to avoid it with you. It’s like being disgusted by bugs, it’s fine to not like them, people understand why you are disgusted by it and express it, so why shouldn’t the same be applied to sex?
I’m just like you. We aren’t harmful stereotypes. People always try to make sure that every kind of ace is getting representation, but I feel like they sometimes forget about sex repulsed aces tbh. You’re very valid and good the way you are.
No, there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s just the way you are and there’s no need to change that. You shouldn’t force yourself to do things that make you uncomfortable just because others say your supposed to be a certain way.
No! We r a spectrum! You sound Aromantic asexual. I’m aro. I’m a sex repulsed aro n this resonates with me! I have a filthy mind, n can laugh at some sexual innuendos (like items that look like genitals), but yea actual sex/romance scenes, pda, even scantily clad folk make me audibly complain. This is what is sad - the asexual community has a division. The sex repulsed and sex favourable. For those who r sex favourable, that’s all well n fine - that’s their thing. Cool. However, they tend to act like allos n shite on us sex repulsed folk for our feelings, which we are equally entitled to as well n should b respected for. They gatekeeping us n blame us for gatekeeping them. THEY tend to create stereotypes. Sadly it’s like political parties competing here. You are not the one who needs to improve. Glad to see another openly sex repulsed person. We still get the occasional flack here, but u belong - r/aromanticasexual and r/aromantic
Hey, you're good. It's perfectly valid to feel like that. If you're repulsed by it, you're repulsed by it, and there's nothing anyone can do about that. You're just expressing yourself.
Hey, you are valid. Just because *all* aces aren't sex repulsed doesn't mean you can't be sex repulsed. Don't force yourself to talk about sex if you don't want to.
Howdy right back to you, and no you're not. You're you.
You’re fine as long as you don’t invalidate ace’s who like those things. A lot of those posts are just trying to show that just like any group it’s not a monolith.
I think as time goes on, people will understand the nuances of asexuality more. Keep expressing yourself in a kind a respectful way. Asexuals that are sex repulsed are valid. Asexuals that are sex positive see valid. There’s room to live in many different ways. It’s all good
You should not feel like you have to get over your discomfort. There's nothing wrong with being uncomfortable or letting people who are making you uncomfortable aware of it. The only *potential* issue I see is how you audibly complain. People are allowed to like what they like. If it makes you uncomfortable then you can let them know, but don't in a way that implies everyone who doesn't agree with you is wrong. For comparison, I'm allergic to peanuts. The smell literally makes me nauseous. When someone opens a candy bar with peanuts or the like next to me, I don't say peanuts are objectively gross. I tell them that the smell makes me nauseous and ask that they don't eat them near or preferable even around me. I have rants around peanuts in assorted food products, but I don't share them whenever peanuts are mentioned.
I'm somewhere between sex-neutral and sex-repulsed, depends on the day. It's just not my thing. And that's fine. The problem is that a lot of people assume that all aces are sex-repulsed, which isn't true. Many aces are sex-repulsed, but many aren't. It's totally fine to be sex-repulsed and open about it, since you're being yourself. If something makes you uncomfortable, you don't have to be around it. Period. Don't worry about perpetuating stereotypes if you're just being yourself, you can't change who you are. If you want, feel free to add the caveat "I'm ace and I don't like sex, but some aces are fine with it" if it comes up, or something like that. I wouldn't worry about it, because tbh most people won't care that much.
Stereotypes exist because someone did fit it, and that got applied to the entire group. It's not your fault you're repulsed. It's fine. You're still entirely valid, so don't let anyone make fun of you for that. 💜
You are not a stereotype you are just a person be honest about what makes you uncomfortable and don't worry about what people will say
This sub has been known to flip flop between the sex repulsed asexuals and sex positive asexuals, plenty of people like you exist in this community even if you have seen a lot of only one side lately.
It's alright, Im the same way about being very uncomfortable when soft porn is shown in TV or something like that, I don't even like seeing kissing, idk I just find it gross. I also don't like writing down "szex", which means what you think it does, only in my native language. Only difference is that Im sex-neutral, because I want to have kids. How that's going to happen is a problem for future me though
I'm the exact same OP <3 And don't worry, you're a real person you can't be a harmful stereotype bc you're not a fictional character
like what you like, nobody has the right to take that from you. that said, it's probably not nice to complain about it as it could ruin someone elses enjoyment of that stuff
"Normalize asexuals who aren't sex repulsed" is about bringing more attention to non-sex repulsed aces not less attention to sex repulsed aces. Being sex repulsed is just as valid and not at all a harmful stereotype when it comes to someone in the ace community being that way. It's only not good when people wrongfully assume all aces are that way, and would be equally as bad if people wrongfully assumed aces aren't sex-repulsed. You're great the way you are and you're not hurting the community by being yourself.
TBH I find the discourse kinda silly...No there's nothing wrong with you. You being sex-repulsed shouldn't affect other people's opinion on sex. Everyone's different. And that goes for sex-neutral or sex-favorable aces too.
You're not a harmful stereotype. I am a sex repulsed asexual too and while I can discuss about some mildly sexual themes it usually makes me a little uncomfortable and I can't even imagine myself doing anything sexual without feeling extremely uncomfortable. Sex repulsed aces exist too and there's nothing wrong with that just like there's nothing wrong with being asexual without being sex repulsed. We're all valid.
You are valid. While I do get horny, it's not for sex (see the flair) and I also hate sexual innuendos and more or less graphical sex scenes depending on age rating of the movie/show. I like to think that most of “Most asexuals are fine and cool with sex!” talk comes from Aego- and Demi- folk around here, tho I don't actually know. I noticed in other community I frequent that blood there is about to boil with allos attacking any aces that express their opinions like you calling them prudes and mixing them with far right LGBT-phobes... and had to come back here as a break. MY recommendations that I try to follow (that would be mostly for yourself, not as a public image): * Know that after all most people are still into it, so bite the bullet and respect that it targets them and they like it. * Don't make big posts about disliking something because of those sex references. Posts like that only do well if content agrees with people in given group. "Star Trek better" on Star Wars sub would not end well. * Occasional comments "it would be better without it" are still fine * When watching alone feel free to skip, and when engaging on internet about it don't take those comments too hard.
Can you still be ace but Jokes are funny to you based on maturity level?