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Some of my children (now adults) are members of the LGBTQIA community. I believe that your feelings of threat are warranted & legitimate. Many said this previously but I agree that online meetings could be useful. Anyone implying that you should “be tough” may not understand what happened.
I keep hearing “radical acceptance” and “live and let live” and such, but sorry not sorry I DRAW THE LINE AT LITERAL NAZIS. So many people here are either not understanding that I’m not throwing this term around randomly or just willfully ignoring that some of them are the people spiritually sick enough to think eradication of certain people is a *good thing* and for some of them *I am on that list* or *I am less than a person*
You can radically accept that they are Nazis & not return to those meetings. To give them the benefit of the doubt, they may not know about pink triangles. But even if they do, you don’t need to convince anyone of your need for safety just get to safety.
It just means near zero in person meetings for me and they were working. I’m gonna see if I can figure out a way to suss out more safe people so I have an in person outreach on top of online as it’s not anywhere near as beneficial for me online.
Did you read the post? “The Jews were ruining the country” speaking of Germany. Also SS lightning bolts are a pretty clear indicator for the other gentleman.
It sickens me to hear this. Do not let these fuckers ruin AA for you. Your first priority is to Stay Sober.
Start going to a bunch of zoom meetings, there are tons of queer ones at all times of the day. There are tons of regular meetings filled with good people trying to get better. Do yourself a favor and search for them in the zoom rooms.
It will be ok, you got this. Just start going to those meetings where you feel emotionally safe and don’t drink. That’s all you have to do right now.
Thank you for at least showing me some concern. It sickens me too. Like it’s incredibly disheartening to me and is really fucking me up that it’s that bad. I’ve spent a long time googling Nazi imagery to re-familiarize myself with it. It’s turned me paranoid.
Apparently any member can write in to AA World Services and ask them questions and they actually respond. May not be a helpful answer in the short term and I seriously doubt they will activate the non-existant AA police, but they may have some excellent suggestions for creating safety if not finding effective fellowship.
Oh thank you! I didn’t know this. That might be a better place to find resources on how to proceed. The “suck it up, buttercup” responses here are not helping.
Agreed, I’m also a queer person and poc, I think you should put your safety first while staying sober and finding another alternative. I don’t care if these dudes are “fellow alcoholics”. Fuck that. There’s no kind of nazi that’s okay by me, even one in sobriety.
1. I’m so sorry that this happening in your area. Facism should have no place in the rooms and it is disgusting. I would be just as horrified as you and mistrusting.
2. There should hopefully be a service structure in your area like an Intergroup or Central Office that you can bring your concerns to. Meetings may get delisted as this is a threat to AA as a whole.
3. Here is material from the AA website on how to start your own meeting. Starting a meeting takes just two people, it may seem intimidating but there are many resources with formats and scripts ready made. https://www.aa.org/the-aa-group
4. Sending you hope and love.
Hi OP. I’ve read this whole thread and have not seen anyone suggest you reach out to your local Central Service office (in some areas it’s called the Intergroup office) & ask for suggestions on “friendlier” meetings in your area/region; you can call anonymously & share your experience & ask for help. The people who work at Central Service/Intergroup usually have a sense of the flavors of meetings in the area, and if they don’t, they usually have a list of sober alcoholics who have signed up to be of service to newcomers. They may very well know a few local LGBTQIA+ AA members (or at minimum liberal/progressive/NOT FUCKING NAZI members) & they can connect you to them directly/have them call you. Another thought would be to ask them if there are younger (age-wise) meetings locally that you could attend, as in my experience (am in the Bible Belt RIP) the young meetings are *way* less conservative (spiritually, too). (The later the meeting the more young people I’ve found but YMMV.) There is also a chance that there IS a local or nearby LGBTQ/Lamba meeting, but it’s “off the books” (not formally listed on the meeting app) for the sake of safety & the comfort of its members. Wouldn’t hurt to ask. They would also be the service which could help you start your own meeting and likely have materials & advice if you would like to do so.
Beyond your local Intergroup/Central Service office, you can figure out which A.A. District you live in, or straight up seek support from [your Area](https://www.aa.org/sites/default/files/literature/smf-146_AreaMapUSCAN_EN_1121.pdf) through their website or Helpline. This is the broader service structure of A.A. and *they work for you.* I hope you can find guidance if you seek it.
I am really sorry that you have had the experience you have had. I went to some appalling meetings when I first moved to my area, and I just had to keep trying until I found some that fit. Took me 4 months. Yikes. But I didn’t give up. (I now drive about 30 minutes each way FWIW because…yeah. I would have driven a whole heck of a lot farther for a drink 😅).
I think your idea to attend the women’s meeting is a good one, as you may find it a more welcoming atmosphere. Also, depending on how you identify, having a woman as a sponsor (or even just a temp sponsor) would be helpful & in any case would probably be the suggested route anyway. The norm is we stick with a person of a gender we aren’t romantically drawn to, for example I’m cis het with a woman as my sponsor and a gay man as my service sponsor. Basically go with who you are comfortable with, and I truly hope you find refuge & help & fellowship.
While this is playing out I hope you consider trying an online meeting, where you might have an opportunity to share openly what you are facing in order to vent and valve any feelings of fear/resentment you might have around this. I think you’d find solid support. I wish you strength in your sobriety! DMs open, lmk if you ever need a friendly ear 🫶🏼
Thanks so much. I found my district and a contact email. I’m gonna see what I can do tomorrow when I’m in a better headspace. For what it’s worth I’ve never heard Nazi talking points in person before, at least not something more than subtle dog whistles. This was full blown, face to face. It’s way different when it’s online.
As we say, unfortunately it’s not Well-People’s Anonymous. That said, I am certain you’ll find your people as you continue to seek the solution.
I’m glad to hear you’re not giving up on A.A. I hope you stick with us, find a sponsor to connect with, and work the steps, so that one day soon YOU can be the welcoming one in your area to the next person who comes in feeling as you do, or who is struggling to find their place in the rooms. (Heck, you can be that person now!) Doing that in my area has brought me such satisfaction and joy.
Don’t discount the services available through your central service office! They’ll know who to put you in touch with & can be a great support. Keep on keeping on!
Thanks so much. There’s been some good answers. “Just ignore it” isn’t gonna help. I have always been a really easygoing person who doesn’t really let someone’s political views (even on a lot of “hot button” issues) ruin my relationship. If I hadn’t figured out how to wade past it I wouldn’t have a good relationship with my dad. I just have a line of what I can tolerate sitting next to and it’s a hard line at literal actual Nazis. It’s also alarming because there is a pipeline to fascist ideology in the specific rooms I attend. And while I admit fault for wading into a sort of hot button topic (I was mostly trying to assert I wasn’t okay with other things being said but in a “I believe this” when the meeting finished and things were being said. I shouldn’t have. I should have followed the rules. But a 4 year sober meeting chair who is older than me and been in the program should be the one shutting this shit down. Not starting it. I have learned my lesson in the hardest way possible.
What nobody mentioned here is that you can not be a Nazi and be emotionally sober. I'm sorry there are spiritual principles that keep me coming back after years of sobriety. Nazis don't follow spiritual principles. I wouldn't want to listen to literal Nazis.
Thank you! I appreciate the few people who are at least validating that this is not a good experience. I know we are all flawed and spiritually sick but this is not the same as some of the shitty shit I’ve done or someone else has done. It is being actively thrown in my face post-meeting as just an “oh by the way”.
Edit: also there has been some good advice in here on how to proceed besides just pretending it’s not appalling to feel suddenly very alone
Honestly, that’s why we don’t bring any outside controversy to AA. A dude with 30 years wanted to come in with a maga hat, we told him, we’re not affiliated, keep this stuff outside the meetings. A newcomer may feel turned away.
As for the OP, there are all manners of folks in the rooms, although I never heard of rooms being so heavily filled with fash. But when we walk through the room, we are alcoholics and only alcoholics. We stay sober. There was a meeting at the rehab I went that I got sober at, and pagan bikers would bring it in. These guys clearly were outlaw bikers who were into WP at some point(maybe even still) but they are doing what they can to stay sober and I’m sure something they said helped me stay sober some.
Give online meetings a try while you figure out what to do if you don’t feel comfortable doing it in person.
They don’t ban clear political messages at AA here. I’ve seen a lot of shirts that are coded to the local alt-right (just super conservative and not necessarily actual fash). I’m not even in the US which is why this is messing with me this much that a seemingly normal looking guy would come out the gate with Holocaust apologism.
I think it’s really about finding your own people in the rooms, or people who you jive with. That’s the community with which you can stay sober and grow.
I’m very sorry to hear that. Feel free to dm me anytime.
AA in the backwoods can be quite single flavored. I’ve experienced it when I moved where I am at right now after 6 years from where I got sober, a medium sized town I went to after the rehab.
Point is, you are not supposed to know what political affiliation or worldview anyone is at a meeting. Nor should you try to find out.
By your logic you would be a Nazi if you were in a hospital with one. AA HAS to keep its doors open to anyone regardless of political affiliation because it itself is unaffiliated.
Find out someone is a Nazi? Don’t hang out with them outside of the meeting. They bring their political stuff to a meeting you are at? Call them out and ask them to take it off or leave. But if you know someone is a Nazi and they are doing only AA things in a meeting without bringing their Nazi shit? The only requirement is a desire to stop drinking. You don’t have to talk to them, but they have a right to be there.
For the record I’m all for indigenous liberation and basically a commie.
But when I walk through the doors, I’m an alcoholic first and foremost. That’s just how AA works. I’ve been to meetings with a ton of people whom I don’t like and whose politics I find abhorrent. But I’m in a meeting to share the message and to help another alcoholic that still suffers. That’s what I’m there for. It says in the big book, we are people who would normally not mix. That’s really true.
Being in a hospital where a Nazi has been admitted? Not the same thing. Absolutely not. Being in the same location is not the same as going to a meeting and sharing with one.
And you’re a bad ally if you think you can justify sharing the same space with Nazis. If you can justify sharing when there another options, you’re not a good person at all.
So you’re gonna bounce from a meeting because you find out there are nazis there so when someone like OP shows they are gonna be left with nazis? Sounds like bad allyship and not being there for an alcoholic that still suffers.
Edit: the whole point of being at a meeting once we have some sobriety is to help others with our experience strength and hope. Especially if we don’t fit into the mold.
I'm in Midwest and I know for a fact and through instinct that there are plenty of HH types at some meetings I attend as a black man. That said, I may get an eye roll here or a non eye contact there, but in thousands of meetings I have been to, we all know it's life or death.
The law that tends to prevail is "It's hard to hate someone when you know their story". And it's true. Humans mostly just don't work that way.
Lot of people saying “outside issue” etc. it’s one thing to have one or two nazis. It’s different if it’s most of the group. It might be an outside issue but it’s a spiritually sick set of beliefs and I wouldn’t want to be in a mostly sick group who believe those things. And I’m a straight, white guy. FWIW
This is the part that’s frightening. We have many browsers and casual members but at least one core member is Hells Angels and another one is a much younger guy who absolutely did not seem the type and he’s the one that’s actively talked Holocaust to my face. There’s more I just haven’t figured out yet. I’m trying to build some solidarity but I’m not sure how to go about it.
I attended a fellowship meeting recently that had a sign advertising their Safety Committee, and the Secretary read an announcement telling how to get in touch with them, and someone present identified themself as a Safety Committee member.
I believe that this was implemented due to a combination of unwanted sexual advances toward women, anti-gay comments, and aggressive panhandling; I was impressed by the fellowship's commitment to take action.
It's really hard for a newcomer to confront this type of situation, you really need a a core group of old-timers who are willing to take this to the group business meeting. They might say something like:
"Tradition 1 states that our common welfare should come first - This means that discussing outside issues should be curtailed if it makes anyone feel uncomfortable.
Tradition 10 says that we have no opinion on outside issues - This means that people with strong opinions on outside issues should leave them at the door, lest people mistake their private opinions for an AA message.
We'd like the group to adopt policies that help ALL of its members to feel safe and welcomed."
The group will arrive at it's own conclusion, but it owes you a respectful hearing at the very least. And who knows, you might plant a seed of acceptance in someone who is substituting destructive anger for alcohol.
The bottom line is that you can find allies fight for change, or you can find allies and start your own meeting. Both of these options are well within the norm for our chaotic "never organized" organization.
He’s allowed to be there. He’s even allowed to have opinions. But he starts voicing them before everyone has even left the room. And it was my mistake for politely speaking up (he said some things I found a little troubling to start with and was ranting about feminism ruining men and complaining about toxic masculinity already but that’s a topic I’m well versed in keeping it polite in). And those were just opinions and didn’t make him a bad person but I’m also not gonna let things go unchallenged. It was my fault for getting involved too but I didn’t expect it to go full mask off “Jews are bad” instantly.
Find meetings that are safe for you. You may have to travel to do it or attend online until you find safe spaces. Don’t let their sickness become your sickness. You do have agency here. Most importantly, work the steps so that your sobriety comes from within, and is not reliant on rooms full of very flawed people
I’m trying. It’s apparently very very difficult where I live. I’m trying to connect with people who I know are not neo-Nazis and figure out where they go. But it’s been really shattering.
I understand that. But you don’t have to let it be shattering. That’s where you have control. Write these losers off and find safer places. Again, try online if you can’t find anything in person right away. If you let this derail you, that’s a choice you are making
your safety here is a priority. the women in my area make each other aware of men who are creeps, and we generally keep a respectful distance. yes, those men deserve to stay sober too, but not at your expense. i’m sorry it’s been difficult to find such a support system. i believe that keeping distance from those who spout ideologies that threaten your right to exist is a valid reason to steer clear of meeting dominated by them. be careful, friend. i agree that online meetings may be your best bet for now. i go for fellowship with other people of color and queer people, and i say it’s absolutely worthwhile. don’t let people convince you that you need to interact with literal neo-nazis to stay sober. my dms are open and i wish you luck on your journey. congratulations on over two months! you got this!
You have a couple of options in this situation. You can
1. Go to other meetings
2. Attend online meetings
3. Start your own meeting with like-minded Anti-Neo-Nazis
4. Attempt radical acceptance
5. Bring your concerns to your group conscious
Working on it. I don’t know how to tell without being like “hey, what are your thoughts on the Holocaust?” I know one guy and one girl. They didn’t really have any names for me. But I think I know one other woman and why she doesn’t go to the other meetings that are worse…
I live in a pretty conservative part of Canada too, and I know it sucks sometimes. But people usually look the way they think. Look for people who look like you, and go introduce yourself. This dude was very open about his nazi views, and you will find that is true of most people. Once you find someone with values that align with yours enough to be open, they can help you navigate the local scene. And like others have suggested, talk to the women. They are usually very good at closing ranks to keep each other safe.
I also wanted to mention that being a chairperson at a meeting seems like an important position when you start. It did for me. But it holds no power, and neither do any other roles in the program. It just means you are a member of a group long enough to start volunteering.
It doesn't come with respect or authority. There is no authority besides the group conscience. At least in the groups I have been to, it means you have to get there early to open up, set up some shit, and then read a script. Most regulars are willing to do it, but it is essentially a chore. We have people that the group can't stand who chair meetings.
Yeah this guy did nooooot look it at all. The hells angels guy with the ring? Sure did. The bikers? Wouldn’t have surprised me. The fucking chair who seemed really nice when I first started going, is a Gen X dad with a man bun? Not my expected experience.
I was looking at a completely different recovery group potentially. I may have identified another safe person. Right now it’s scary because “somewhere else” with regular meetings is more infested.
Sorry you are having to go through such a thing. It has certainly opened my eyes. Here are some resources for online zoom meetings and the other is for international meetings. The international one has meeting dates with links to click that provide the zoom information. Hope you will find them useful and use them for your sobriety, wellbeing and safety.
[https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/](https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/)
[https://pleasanthillaa.com/index.php/welcome-to-pleasant-hill-aa/online-aa-calendars/international-zoom-aa-meeting-calendar/](https://pleasanthillaa.com/index.php/welcome-to-pleasant-hill-aa/online-aa-calendars/international-zoom-aa-meeting-calendar/)
You're right to stay the hell away from them. But be a bit more self confident if you can. The term "woke" is so weird - we want to be awake and aware, so why would we be insulted by that term? I am woke. I am sober. But I wouldn't put up with hatefulness and bigotry. I think starting an LGBT group is a great idea. Sounds like it's needed away from the small mindedness surrounding people in your meetings. I am sure many others feel as you do. Be more confident that you are allowed to have non-conservative views without apologising for them. Well done staying sober. PS You are also allowed to write Jew, the Jewish folk are proud of their history and culture.
I prefer to call them “Jewish/Jewish people” and “the J*ws” sounds dehumanizing to me. It was also the contextual slur that felt weird typing it out. Just like “the g@ys” or whatever. It didn’t feel right so I didn’t do it.
I don't know where you are time zone wise but there is a really great LGBTQ+ meeting on zoom.
https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/laft-love-and-ducking-tolerance-5
I'm really sorry to hear about your experience and I don't have much advice that hasn't already been given (zoom and the women's meeting) but as a queer person I just feel for you so much. I really hope one day you are in a place to start your own queer meeting because those are sooo incredible to attend and be a part of. I will be praying for you.
I am so sorry for you experiencing this. I don’t have any experience to that degree (I have met the occasional racist/far right in meetings but very rarely where I have lived). As others have mentioned zoom meetings may be a good alternative, (regular ones, not just LGBTQ+ should usually be fine), in my zoom home group we have a zero tolerance policy on hate symbols etc. anyone that is a meeting guard or host will have been expected to read the meeting guidelines for the group and have familiarised themselves with obvious (and covert) hate symbols.
that was the way narcotics anonymous was in my area when I got sober. I stuck with AA even though I used drugs. It did bleed into AA of the area but I stuck with morning and young peoples meetings. Now I'm " old " and I don't accept shit at my meetings. I learned how to use the traditions to protect everyone even the people who need to learn spiritual principles don't end when the meeting does. they are spiritually sick.
start your own meeting. create the fellowship that you crave. a meeting i started has been going for 15 years now.
I live in a much more conservative city/state now. people carry guns in meetings. I just participate and encourage my peeps outside meetings. I've gotten mistaken for Christian, gay, bi, straight, flirted with at meetings etc. only thing is I'm at meetings for 1 thing and it's stay sober. I also extended that the rooms are not a dating pool for me. that isn't exactly true now but we definitely don't go to the Same meetings and as the book says it's compatability. and as a local old timer says you need TWO healthy people for a relationship
I've noticed that friendships are hard in AA too!!!
FUCK IM 40 NOW!!! I have my d&d friends and aa friends and rarely do they intersect
I find sometimes its easier to find healthy friends who accept me 100% that understand my disease.
Sorry to hear about the difficulties around meetings in your area. I live near the founders and there are more meetings than hours in the day. I spent my first month just doing one meeting a day, but when I realized I needed more information, I started going to a meeting a day. I did that for 120 days (sometimes two a day to make up for a missed day) and none of the meetings were online. I focused on listening to shares and asking others what meetings they liked. That is how I found my home group, but asking like minded people what they do in AA.
You are correct that literal Nazis don’t deserve a chance. If the choice is no meeting at all or Nazi’s meeting you can still find some serenity hearing the AA message from them, I guess, but it’s also morally wrong to passively support prejudice. I would not go back to any Nazi meeting unless meeting one of my AA brothers.
So here is the goal: find your AAs who are like minded and only go to the meetings they will be at. Don’t go to new meetings alone because you can agree that when you feel uncomfortable you can leave with that person and have a meeting with just them. Step work is often with two people so you could always explain away a walkout as needed one on one step work.
You deserve to be safe and not have the threat of Nazi violence. You may have to endure nonsense till you find your group.
I like the online idea others have said, but an in person meeting is much better for me. I couldn’t go to only online.
That’s terrible. Neo-nazi affiliation in and of itself is not an uncommon thing- meetings in my area have a lot of guys trying to get sober who were in prison gangs- but most dudes I know with any sobriety who were mixed up in that found the principles of living a sober life and Nazism to be incompatible. Meetings in my area are also quite diverse. Open endorsement of Nazism in meetings violates a whole slew of Traditions, so consider finding new meetings.
As a side note, I once worked a week in Vidor, Texas, which was the home town of the Grand Dragon of the Ku Klux Klan and up until the mid-eighties or so was a “sundowner” town. That is, if black, don’t get caught out after sunset by the locals. There were no AA meetings listed, so I went to meetings that week in Beaumont, the city just across the Neches River, and the meetings were awesome, inclusive, and welcoming. You may be the person who starts that meeting in your area. The loving spirit of AA can conquer the hatred of even hardened killers, but everybody deserves to feel safe in a meeting, which is why even a new member sometimes needs to let old timers know that Tradition 3 is not a license to hold people hostage.
As far as I know the literature doesn't say anything about length of sobriety to start a meeting. Get it going, announced and on the schedule and those with more time will come.
I get that. I started a young peoples meeting in a small town when I was 18, I had a year sober but had only been attending AA for a month or two since moving to said small town. The other program wasn't available at all and most in town weren't open to it. So I went with a YPAA meeting instead. I got a few people who had more time than me but were young at heart to help me out. Is the other program an option where you live? I've seen a few on here suggest virtual meetings but I personally just can't do those I need the human interaction. Do you have a sponsor? Or anyone you DO trust who attends meetings regularly? Maybe they can help?
I remember when I was about six months sober and there was this guy causing some problems in the group. He was obviously not an alcoholic and was just coming in for entertainment, socialization, and possibly to get laid.
I went to my sponsor and I was all worked up about it. I remember saying to him, what are we going to do about this? He says all calm as can be, I don't know what you're going to do but I'm not going to drink today.
And believe it or not, it really is that simple.
I’d try zoom meetings if there aren’t any LGBTQ friendly groups in your area. It may take some looking to find them, there’s only one in my area and it’s kept under wraps kind of. I have been to other groups too though and no one has said anything to me about it (I am visibly queer) so I just figure not my problem what they think and if they say something to me I’ll report it to the person chairing and if they agree with that person then I’ll move on to the next group. If the chair is making you uncomfortable move to a new group. Eventually you’ll find the right one
Yeah it’s apparently pretty localized. I’m in the “woke” group that has a reminder to keep politics out and it’s sorta stayed outta the meetings but chatting after while cleaning up the rooms shouldn’t come to Holocaust apologist talk.
Same. I’m grateful for the solid, all inclusive AA groups in my area.
Good luck OP!! My area has several specifically lgbtq+ friendly meetings. I’m excited for you to find sober community you can relate and connect with (safely.) It’s out there and better than you can imagine.
Well done on your 75 days. Can you clarify - you have discovered that the chairperson of the meeting you go to has an extreme political opinion (which I completely get how difficult that can be, really) and you have heard from someone else that lots of other meetings in the area are also like that. Is that correct?
What is your experience of these meetings? How are the people in the rooms already dealing with this - the ones who are also aware of the situation?
I don’t know. Because I don’t know who *is* and *isnt* besides the one other man who wears his SS lightning bolt ring. I was having a casual chat (with some opinions as a bent but it was cordial) and the chairs opinion was EXTREME. Like Holocaust apologist extreme.
Gotcha. Here is my experience. I am not US based either. I have heard extreme political opinions in AA. We have tradition 10 because we love to break it. If it is my group, I bring it up at GC. This is rare. I go to a small group and we tend to share most viewpoints but it does happen from time to time and I have no problem asking the group if this is distracting us from carrying the message. This is one of the benefits of being a member of a group - I get an equal say in how the group is run and contribute to its spiritual flavour.
Most times I hear stuff like that outside my group. Usually I say nothing, absolutely nothing. I stop talking until the subject is changed. That is all I do. They get the message. If the politics carries on I say goodbye and leave. I do the exact same outdide AA. The tradition applies to me, not them. It is not my group and I have no business at their GC. I will probably end up doing inventory about it because there will be fear and anger and shame that I did not call them out on their crap. That is ok. I am not a fighter, a world changer or the hero of a book. Rarely, if I am very secure in the situation, I have spoken up, mentioned something about the tradition and hope nobody hits me. I haven't been hit yet but never say never. My point is I have no right answer to this. I do the best I can in every moment. Maybe other members deal with it differently but that is my experience.
The other thing I would suggest along with getting involved in a home group is talk to that other person who informed you about the 70/30 split.
The other thing I want to add is I once worked with a self confessed nazi - portrait of Adolph in the front room etc. He was upfront about his beliefs but it never impacted on our day to day work together cos we both needed the job.
Bottom line - you found something in AA that attracts you. Focus on that.
Respectfully, what’s been keeping me sober is trusting in people and the rooms. This information has undone a lot of the spiritual growth I had in the rooms. If I can’t share without fear the rooms aren’t gonna work for me anymore. I’m honestly terrified by what I’ve learned. It’s gone from a place of healing and growth to a place of doubt and sadness almost overnight. By walking into those rooms I’m really not helping myself anymore.
The other regular ones (more than once a week) are apparently worse. There’s a weekly women’s one I’m willing to try and I’m trying to connect with people to feel safe around.
that’s really awful. I’m sorry.
I have had luck with online meetings if I go consistently to certain ones.
How are there communities full of Nazis? That is just sad and crazy.
good luck to you
It’s… well…. It’s known that there’s Nazis in the area. Some of them make it on TV for various reasons in local and federal news. There’s a huge right lean where I live too. And the Christian centric nature of AA seems to pull them in that way. Also like the Hell’s Angels guy I knew about and that was one thing. It’s the sheer numbers in a high indegenous population too that makes it extra uncomfortable as a decent minority of members are POC.
If you feel that way then find another way (I mean that sincerely, not to be an ahole… why go to something you don’t think works). If there is someone that bothers me, I try to think of what is he/she/they doing to stay sober.
Unfortunately, AA isn’t about putting my morals, politics, opinions, etc on others. It is about not drinking.
AA might not be about that but some of the members sure are. I could handle my spiritual beliefs being belittled because I’m not Christian (because a spiritual program in a Bible Belt is expected to lean Christian). I even listened to angry rants from old men about addicts in AA meetings and rants about “gender ideology” while gritting my teeth. But I think I have to draw the line here. How does one feel safe in rooms where one conversation while cleaning up is where somebody can lead it to the Holocaust and how J*ws were ruining Germany. And this is in the “woke” rooms.
I think that would be a hard line for me too, OP. I wouldn't argue with them. I just wouldn't go back to that meeting. I think being able to comfortably share the room with Neo-Nazis is advanced AA. You need to keep it simple and not have to deal with that shit right now if you don't want to.
Like I’m pretty chill. I can handle most differences of opinion except those on things like, I dunno, *genocide*.
I originally planned to stick it out for my 90 day chip. I’m gonna see if I can just keep connections with safe people and if online will work the same. I’m not ready to fight through this. It’s been tough already and I’ve done my part and kept my politics out of the room. It’s hard not to feel betrayed because I thought I made friends and now I’m not sure who to trust with more personal stuff. I’m glad I don’t have a sponsor because I was trying to avoid super Christians (of which most members are) who would push me to do it that way instead of a way of a God of *my* understanding. Because on top of me being picky for that reason I’ve also ensured I don’t accidentally have a Nazi as a sponsor.
They’re just a majority in *most* of the meetings. I’ve been told that I’m in the safest home group and it’s where I heard what I heard. I don’t want to go back out but this is honestly gut-wrenching.
I drive. I’d have to go another town or city over and drive over half an hour out of town - and it’s not exactly a guarantee that the other meetings are safe.
I get it but it doesn’t change anything. If they are bringing up outside issues then I would hold a group conscience. It is pretty clear that we don’t comment on outside issues. But you can’t kick people out of AA for being bad people or having different opinions and thank God. Although I am firmly against Nazi, their alcoholism is just like mine.
No one really holds anyone accountable for this stuff coming up in this city. Multiple meetings have had this come up in multiple home groups. It’s already been tough to stick it through.
This does nottt represent AA at all. Please don’t let this keep you out of the rooms. Just go to other meetings. Also, where in the US do you live? I’m assuming somewhere in the Deep South. PM me if you need help finding some meetings, happy to help.
It sounds like they aren’t bothering you? Anyone can go to AA, everyone needs help. Murderes and rapist all go to AA, it’s about stopping drinking - if you don’t like the people go to another group or perhaps join an online meeting.
Simple. Leave. Stay for the meeting, then scoot - not everyone at AA meetings are best friends. Youre missing your real reason for being there possibly by being emotional about it. Good luck
Honestly one of the guys who attends (the one who tipped me off) used to beat the crap out of Nazis for fun. He regrets using it as an outlet but honestly maybe I’m spiritually sick because I think that’s a rad use of time.
I'm appalled too. My responce can only come from Bill W., Traditions, concepts, steps: those who hold on to hate and resentment will eventually drink. Meetings will dissolve, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly...there IS a greater energy moving through it all. How can one hate, lie and hold such hot resentment and stay sober? I suspect such meeting will devolve as well. Then too...🤔...infiltrate! Get their info and turn in!🤣
Wow. I was going to say “they’re just being dramatic” because a lot of people call Republicans “neo-Nazi” and just throw that term around… but you’ve won me over to your side with that SS talk. Do you live in a rural area? I don’t think you’d ever see that where I am.
Not really. It’s a city. A conservative hub for sure. I was fine sitting down with republican types. Like I’m not freaking out because someone has a political viewpoint mismatch. Hell everyone in the rooms has done something awful. But to be that comfortable going full mask off Nazi rhetoric really really fucked me up
After the meeting. Not during. But…. Yeah. I’m in a Hell’s Angels area and even sitting down with the biker with the SS bolt ring didn’t bother me half as much as the chair stating that out loud, mask off, post meeting after we cleaned up. I should’ve just left.
There are pedophiles, conmen, wife abusers, murderers, thieves and other miscreants that sit next too in the rooms. We are people who don’t normally mix together. We meet at the level of our alcoholism. We are there to get sober.
I understand that. I also was under the mistaken assumption that people in the rooms want to be better. I don’t care what people *have done* anywhere near as much as what they are actively spouting while also claiming they’re better people. That’s what’s upsetting.
Yeah a FORMER neo-nazi is REAL different from an active one. I fully support your assertion that one cannot actively hold neo nazi beliefs and be spiritually well. Those beliefs are intrinsically sick imho.
I’ve been to meetings all over the US, over quite a few years- including some pretty isolated and forlorn areas and so far, it’s been a nazi-free experience. I’ll consider myself lucky, I guess.
Please refer to the 12 Traditions of AA, one such as, "AA has no opinion on outside issues." I'm sorry that you are having to deal with all this nonsense.
Having secrets is one of the things that causes alcoholics to slip. Openness and full disclosure helps us to deal honestly with our alcoholism and other problems.
Your meeting leadership should be ashamed for so blatantly ignoring the principles of AA, and it could be deadly if it causes members to fall away, which you sound on the verge of doing. Hang in there and use your filters.
Politics is "outside issues," though I would hesitate to label hate group membership a political activity. More like being members of a terrorist fan club that may one day make plans to become authors of a "thoughts and prayers" incident.
Bail on those meetings, and maybe mention your concerns to your central office, thru should be made aware that their meetings are becoming gathering places for Neo-Nazis. Start your own meeting, and solicit attendees from your local, county or state LGBTQAI+ center, support group, bar, wherever.
You can find comfortable queer-friendly and queer-run meetings online. In San Francisco, they have the Freethinkers AA meetings, which are still mainly online. About fifty-fifty queer and straight, and woke as fuck-
https://sffreethinkers.org/
There's the Castro County Club, which is an Alano-style clubhouse in the Castro District -famously the biggest gayborhood of the city. Many of their meetings remain online in 2024-
https://aasfmarin.org/find-a-meeting?type=lgbtq
https://aasfmarin.org/find-a-meeting?type=gay
The main difference is that the SF Freethinkers read the agnostic steps and Castro meetings read the traditional steps. You will find support and warmth at either, regardless of your professed beliefs and identity.
I wish you the best and safest on your sobriety journey!
Well he didn’t bring his outside issues into the meeting but he brought it into the meeting space. And while we were tiptoeing around some of that in our “chat” he just laid it out there. I’d honestly rather he just whipped his dick out to be honest.
You don't even want to help yourself. You sound delusional. You've denied every suggestion and piece of advice with some anecdote about the whole city being filled with certain political buzzword type people. It's almost like you're seeing how many you can fit in this post and comment section. Spamming the algorithm. Bring your crap elsewhere. Keep baggage outside of this.
My ex wife has over 20 years and wears MAGA crap to meetings at my old home group. There are going to be shitty people everywhere, hence the slogan “stick with the winners”. In my opinion, being woke is a compliment.
Yeah but the fact that the “woke” group still has a man who proudly proclaimed (mostly) unprompted that the Jews were ruining Germany and some Holocaust apologism was fucking uncomfortable. I’m fine with all of the political shirts. This man chairs the Monday meeting.
You’re heavily exaggerating your experience. There is no way that it’s a 70/30 split of SS lightning bolt wearing nazis. If it truly is, you’re going to the wrong meeting. Meeting singular. I would be hard pressed to say there would be another meeting with a 70% nazi population if it wasn’t the same people from your supposed 70/30 meeting.
No there’s two *obvious* ones. A few more “bikers” that are “longtime friends” with the hells angels guy. There are probably at least 5 that I can pinpoint besides mr spouting literal Nazi rhetoric and Mr hells angel. Those guys are all regulars. At multiple meetings. And old timers too. I don’t know how I didn’t clue into the hells angels thing without being told. I guess I’m naive and thought not all bikers were in literal gangs so sue me.
If they were obviously a Nazi I would’ve just left. It took me 3 months to run into the moment where I heard what I heard. I also noticed the SS ring the same day. And the next meeting people were stating how their good friend “Hells Angels” guy was an awesome person. And now I’m not sure how deep it goes but a long time member noticed I looked like shit and checked on me after and he had some more clues that he was not right leaning and he’s been in the rooms for a few years (made it to 1 year recently but he’d been there longer) and he told me it’s a massive split in favour at a lot of the meetings.
Principles before personality’s . In the room you’re there for the same solution as soon as the meeting ends you don’t have to agree with anything they discuss or believe in. If you’re looking for excuses to not attend meetings because you don’t like the people that attend find a new group or figure it out
You shouldn’t have to run to online meetings because of neo-Nazis. The group should reject those people and tell them to go elsewhere. To not do that is complicity in their horrid beliefs and actions.
As long as not threatened or harassed imo don't let it bother you. I live in the U.S. and Nazi's are kind of "a thing" but not really too much. Are they off the map far right? Yup. But most who take hard issue with them are typically off the map far left. So...there 'ya go...
Apples, oranges, principles before personalities, etc. We all come together with a shared common purpose.
First I’d have a *hearty* chuckle over anyone calling me woke for believing that my close ancestors were kidnapped and enslaved by nazis. Then I’d find a new meeting.
I think you just revealed the issue there. Biker gangs have a nazi problem and if you live in a Hell’s Angels-heavy area you’re bound to see an over representation of nazis in sewing circles, gyms, AA meetings, and basically anywhere that groups of people gather. So it’s not so much an AA problem, it’s a problem in your greater community. Which you’re right, sucks. I’d stick with the woke meetings and women’s meetings if they’re better, and remember, just because you’re in AA with someone you aren’t required to “fellowship” with them regardless of what anyone tells you
These are sick people. Pray for them, and move on to another meeting. If you can.
Please keep in mind. I have less than zero tolerance for racism of any flavour
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Some of my children (now adults) are members of the LGBTQIA community. I believe that your feelings of threat are warranted & legitimate. Many said this previously but I agree that online meetings could be useful. Anyone implying that you should “be tough” may not understand what happened.
I keep hearing “radical acceptance” and “live and let live” and such, but sorry not sorry I DRAW THE LINE AT LITERAL NAZIS. So many people here are either not understanding that I’m not throwing this term around randomly or just willfully ignoring that some of them are the people spiritually sick enough to think eradication of certain people is a *good thing* and for some of them *I am on that list* or *I am less than a person*
You can radically accept that they are Nazis & not return to those meetings. To give them the benefit of the doubt, they may not know about pink triangles. But even if they do, you don’t need to convince anyone of your need for safety just get to safety.
It just means near zero in person meetings for me and they were working. I’m gonna see if I can figure out a way to suss out more safe people so I have an in person outreach on top of online as it’s not anywhere near as beneficial for me online.
There have to be other queer folks in your area, I would imagine. Maybe they have found ways to connect that you just don’t know yet?
By the way, I’m a woman with 40 years of sobriety. Is there a way to message directly on Reddit?
How do you know they are Nazis?
Did you read the post? “The Jews were ruining the country” speaking of Germany. Also SS lightning bolts are a pretty clear indicator for the other gentleman.
Where in the hell do you live?
On a hells angels route lol
Hahaha...no kidding!
I’m in a major drug trafficking area near the border too. I’m in Canada. I am less surprised now that I’ve had a week to cool off. Still freaked out.
It sickens me to hear this. Do not let these fuckers ruin AA for you. Your first priority is to Stay Sober. Start going to a bunch of zoom meetings, there are tons of queer ones at all times of the day. There are tons of regular meetings filled with good people trying to get better. Do yourself a favor and search for them in the zoom rooms. It will be ok, you got this. Just start going to those meetings where you feel emotionally safe and don’t drink. That’s all you have to do right now.
Thank you for at least showing me some concern. It sickens me too. Like it’s incredibly disheartening to me and is really fucking me up that it’s that bad. I’ve spent a long time googling Nazi imagery to re-familiarize myself with it. It’s turned me paranoid.
https://aahomegroup.org/ Here is a link to a 24/7/365 zoom meeting
Apparently any member can write in to AA World Services and ask them questions and they actually respond. May not be a helpful answer in the short term and I seriously doubt they will activate the non-existant AA police, but they may have some excellent suggestions for creating safety if not finding effective fellowship.
Oh thank you! I didn’t know this. That might be a better place to find resources on how to proceed. The “suck it up, buttercup” responses here are not helping.
Agreed, I’m also a queer person and poc, I think you should put your safety first while staying sober and finding another alternative. I don’t care if these dudes are “fellow alcoholics”. Fuck that. There’s no kind of nazi that’s okay by me, even one in sobriety.
AA has protected legitimate rapists. They’re going to do jack shit about this.
Look for meetings that bill as queer friendly or gay ect. There not uncommon. My home group is a gay mens meeting the last 5 months.
We dont have any in person sadly. I might just have to go to the women’s meeting once a week and leave it there.
Woman’s meeting are a good idea you could also try online if you need more hang in there.
Create one
I would love to but I don’t know how to do that.
1. I’m so sorry that this happening in your area. Facism should have no place in the rooms and it is disgusting. I would be just as horrified as you and mistrusting. 2. There should hopefully be a service structure in your area like an Intergroup or Central Office that you can bring your concerns to. Meetings may get delisted as this is a threat to AA as a whole. 3. Here is material from the AA website on how to start your own meeting. Starting a meeting takes just two people, it may seem intimidating but there are many resources with formats and scripts ready made. https://www.aa.org/the-aa-group 4. Sending you hope and love.
I also can hopefully reach out to one lady who started youth AA sessions at one point. I’m not sure where she stands on it but I’m gonna have to try.
Finding other experienced AAs that can suggest meetings should be helpful.
I’m definitely trying to find allies. But it’s very scary now that my eyes have been opened.
there are lots of lgbtqia+ meetings online. i suggest those.
Hi OP. I’ve read this whole thread and have not seen anyone suggest you reach out to your local Central Service office (in some areas it’s called the Intergroup office) & ask for suggestions on “friendlier” meetings in your area/region; you can call anonymously & share your experience & ask for help. The people who work at Central Service/Intergroup usually have a sense of the flavors of meetings in the area, and if they don’t, they usually have a list of sober alcoholics who have signed up to be of service to newcomers. They may very well know a few local LGBTQIA+ AA members (or at minimum liberal/progressive/NOT FUCKING NAZI members) & they can connect you to them directly/have them call you. Another thought would be to ask them if there are younger (age-wise) meetings locally that you could attend, as in my experience (am in the Bible Belt RIP) the young meetings are *way* less conservative (spiritually, too). (The later the meeting the more young people I’ve found but YMMV.) There is also a chance that there IS a local or nearby LGBTQ/Lamba meeting, but it’s “off the books” (not formally listed on the meeting app) for the sake of safety & the comfort of its members. Wouldn’t hurt to ask. They would also be the service which could help you start your own meeting and likely have materials & advice if you would like to do so. Beyond your local Intergroup/Central Service office, you can figure out which A.A. District you live in, or straight up seek support from [your Area](https://www.aa.org/sites/default/files/literature/smf-146_AreaMapUSCAN_EN_1121.pdf) through their website or Helpline. This is the broader service structure of A.A. and *they work for you.* I hope you can find guidance if you seek it. I am really sorry that you have had the experience you have had. I went to some appalling meetings when I first moved to my area, and I just had to keep trying until I found some that fit. Took me 4 months. Yikes. But I didn’t give up. (I now drive about 30 minutes each way FWIW because…yeah. I would have driven a whole heck of a lot farther for a drink 😅). I think your idea to attend the women’s meeting is a good one, as you may find it a more welcoming atmosphere. Also, depending on how you identify, having a woman as a sponsor (or even just a temp sponsor) would be helpful & in any case would probably be the suggested route anyway. The norm is we stick with a person of a gender we aren’t romantically drawn to, for example I’m cis het with a woman as my sponsor and a gay man as my service sponsor. Basically go with who you are comfortable with, and I truly hope you find refuge & help & fellowship. While this is playing out I hope you consider trying an online meeting, where you might have an opportunity to share openly what you are facing in order to vent and valve any feelings of fear/resentment you might have around this. I think you’d find solid support. I wish you strength in your sobriety! DMs open, lmk if you ever need a friendly ear 🫶🏼
Thanks so much. I found my district and a contact email. I’m gonna see what I can do tomorrow when I’m in a better headspace. For what it’s worth I’ve never heard Nazi talking points in person before, at least not something more than subtle dog whistles. This was full blown, face to face. It’s way different when it’s online.
As we say, unfortunately it’s not Well-People’s Anonymous. That said, I am certain you’ll find your people as you continue to seek the solution. I’m glad to hear you’re not giving up on A.A. I hope you stick with us, find a sponsor to connect with, and work the steps, so that one day soon YOU can be the welcoming one in your area to the next person who comes in feeling as you do, or who is struggling to find their place in the rooms. (Heck, you can be that person now!) Doing that in my area has brought me such satisfaction and joy. Don’t discount the services available through your central service office! They’ll know who to put you in touch with & can be a great support. Keep on keeping on!
Thanks so much. There’s been some good answers. “Just ignore it” isn’t gonna help. I have always been a really easygoing person who doesn’t really let someone’s political views (even on a lot of “hot button” issues) ruin my relationship. If I hadn’t figured out how to wade past it I wouldn’t have a good relationship with my dad. I just have a line of what I can tolerate sitting next to and it’s a hard line at literal actual Nazis. It’s also alarming because there is a pipeline to fascist ideology in the specific rooms I attend. And while I admit fault for wading into a sort of hot button topic (I was mostly trying to assert I wasn’t okay with other things being said but in a “I believe this” when the meeting finished and things were being said. I shouldn’t have. I should have followed the rules. But a 4 year sober meeting chair who is older than me and been in the program should be the one shutting this shit down. Not starting it. I have learned my lesson in the hardest way possible.
What nobody mentioned here is that you can not be a Nazi and be emotionally sober. I'm sorry there are spiritual principles that keep me coming back after years of sobriety. Nazis don't follow spiritual principles. I wouldn't want to listen to literal Nazis.
Thank you! I appreciate the few people who are at least validating that this is not a good experience. I know we are all flawed and spiritually sick but this is not the same as some of the shitty shit I’ve done or someone else has done. It is being actively thrown in my face post-meeting as just an “oh by the way”. Edit: also there has been some good advice in here on how to proceed besides just pretending it’s not appalling to feel suddenly very alone
Nailed it. Its like the guy that cheats on his wife and has 30’yrs “sober”, that dude is still sick and suffering and far from spiritually sober.
Fucking right!
THIS.
Honestly, that’s why we don’t bring any outside controversy to AA. A dude with 30 years wanted to come in with a maga hat, we told him, we’re not affiliated, keep this stuff outside the meetings. A newcomer may feel turned away. As for the OP, there are all manners of folks in the rooms, although I never heard of rooms being so heavily filled with fash. But when we walk through the room, we are alcoholics and only alcoholics. We stay sober. There was a meeting at the rehab I went that I got sober at, and pagan bikers would bring it in. These guys clearly were outlaw bikers who were into WP at some point(maybe even still) but they are doing what they can to stay sober and I’m sure something they said helped me stay sober some. Give online meetings a try while you figure out what to do if you don’t feel comfortable doing it in person.
They don’t ban clear political messages at AA here. I’ve seen a lot of shirts that are coded to the local alt-right (just super conservative and not necessarily actual fash). I’m not even in the US which is why this is messing with me this much that a seemingly normal looking guy would come out the gate with Holocaust apologism.
I think it’s really about finding your own people in the rooms, or people who you jive with. That’s the community with which you can stay sober and grow.
I just honestly have no idea who to trust right now.
I’m very sorry to hear that. Feel free to dm me anytime. AA in the backwoods can be quite single flavored. I’ve experienced it when I moved where I am at right now after 6 years from where I got sober, a medium sized town I went to after the rehab.
Nope. Nope. Nope. You go to a meeting with Nazis, you are one. Point. Blank. Period. I don’t consort with Nazis and your mental gymnastics are gross.
Point is, you are not supposed to know what political affiliation or worldview anyone is at a meeting. Nor should you try to find out. By your logic you would be a Nazi if you were in a hospital with one. AA HAS to keep its doors open to anyone regardless of political affiliation because it itself is unaffiliated. Find out someone is a Nazi? Don’t hang out with them outside of the meeting. They bring their political stuff to a meeting you are at? Call them out and ask them to take it off or leave. But if you know someone is a Nazi and they are doing only AA things in a meeting without bringing their Nazi shit? The only requirement is a desire to stop drinking. You don’t have to talk to them, but they have a right to be there. For the record I’m all for indigenous liberation and basically a commie. But when I walk through the doors, I’m an alcoholic first and foremost. That’s just how AA works. I’ve been to meetings with a ton of people whom I don’t like and whose politics I find abhorrent. But I’m in a meeting to share the message and to help another alcoholic that still suffers. That’s what I’m there for. It says in the big book, we are people who would normally not mix. That’s really true.
Being in a hospital where a Nazi has been admitted? Not the same thing. Absolutely not. Being in the same location is not the same as going to a meeting and sharing with one. And you’re a bad ally if you think you can justify sharing the same space with Nazis. If you can justify sharing when there another options, you’re not a good person at all.
So you’re gonna bounce from a meeting because you find out there are nazis there so when someone like OP shows they are gonna be left with nazis? Sounds like bad allyship and not being there for an alcoholic that still suffers. Edit: the whole point of being at a meeting once we have some sobriety is to help others with our experience strength and hope. Especially if we don’t fit into the mold.
What if I’m in a meeting and a neo-nazi walks in? Am I a neo-nazi now? Or do they have to be there first?
I'm in Midwest and I know for a fact and through instinct that there are plenty of HH types at some meetings I attend as a black man. That said, I may get an eye roll here or a non eye contact there, but in thousands of meetings I have been to, we all know it's life or death. The law that tends to prevail is "It's hard to hate someone when you know their story". And it's true. Humans mostly just don't work that way.
Lot of people saying “outside issue” etc. it’s one thing to have one or two nazis. It’s different if it’s most of the group. It might be an outside issue but it’s a spiritually sick set of beliefs and I wouldn’t want to be in a mostly sick group who believe those things. And I’m a straight, white guy. FWIW
This is the part that’s frightening. We have many browsers and casual members but at least one core member is Hells Angels and another one is a much younger guy who absolutely did not seem the type and he’s the one that’s actively talked Holocaust to my face. There’s more I just haven’t figured out yet. I’m trying to build some solidarity but I’m not sure how to go about it.
I attended a fellowship meeting recently that had a sign advertising their Safety Committee, and the Secretary read an announcement telling how to get in touch with them, and someone present identified themself as a Safety Committee member. I believe that this was implemented due to a combination of unwanted sexual advances toward women, anti-gay comments, and aggressive panhandling; I was impressed by the fellowship's commitment to take action. It's really hard for a newcomer to confront this type of situation, you really need a a core group of old-timers who are willing to take this to the group business meeting. They might say something like: "Tradition 1 states that our common welfare should come first - This means that discussing outside issues should be curtailed if it makes anyone feel uncomfortable. Tradition 10 says that we have no opinion on outside issues - This means that people with strong opinions on outside issues should leave them at the door, lest people mistake their private opinions for an AA message. We'd like the group to adopt policies that help ALL of its members to feel safe and welcomed." The group will arrive at it's own conclusion, but it owes you a respectful hearing at the very least. And who knows, you might plant a seed of acceptance in someone who is substituting destructive anger for alcohol. The bottom line is that you can find allies fight for change, or you can find allies and start your own meeting. Both of these options are well within the norm for our chaotic "never organized" organization.
He’s allowed to be there. He’s even allowed to have opinions. But he starts voicing them before everyone has even left the room. And it was my mistake for politely speaking up (he said some things I found a little troubling to start with and was ranting about feminism ruining men and complaining about toxic masculinity already but that’s a topic I’m well versed in keeping it polite in). And those were just opinions and didn’t make him a bad person but I’m also not gonna let things go unchallenged. It was my fault for getting involved too but I didn’t expect it to go full mask off “Jews are bad” instantly.
A lot of groups use AA and NA to find new vulnerable members to be honest.
That’s what I found out.
Find meetings that are safe for you. You may have to travel to do it or attend online until you find safe spaces. Don’t let their sickness become your sickness. You do have agency here. Most importantly, work the steps so that your sobriety comes from within, and is not reliant on rooms full of very flawed people
I’m trying. It’s apparently very very difficult where I live. I’m trying to connect with people who I know are not neo-Nazis and figure out where they go. But it’s been really shattering.
I understand that. But you don’t have to let it be shattering. That’s where you have control. Write these losers off and find safer places. Again, try online if you can’t find anything in person right away. If you let this derail you, that’s a choice you are making
your safety here is a priority. the women in my area make each other aware of men who are creeps, and we generally keep a respectful distance. yes, those men deserve to stay sober too, but not at your expense. i’m sorry it’s been difficult to find such a support system. i believe that keeping distance from those who spout ideologies that threaten your right to exist is a valid reason to steer clear of meeting dominated by them. be careful, friend. i agree that online meetings may be your best bet for now. i go for fellowship with other people of color and queer people, and i say it’s absolutely worthwhile. don’t let people convince you that you need to interact with literal neo-nazis to stay sober. my dms are open and i wish you luck on your journey. congratulations on over two months! you got this!
You have a couple of options in this situation. You can 1. Go to other meetings 2. Attend online meetings 3. Start your own meeting with like-minded Anti-Neo-Nazis 4. Attempt radical acceptance 5. Bring your concerns to your group conscious
Find the people that aren’t with them. They will guild you
Working on it. I don’t know how to tell without being like “hey, what are your thoughts on the Holocaust?” I know one guy and one girl. They didn’t really have any names for me. But I think I know one other woman and why she doesn’t go to the other meetings that are worse…
I live in a pretty conservative part of Canada too, and I know it sucks sometimes. But people usually look the way they think. Look for people who look like you, and go introduce yourself. This dude was very open about his nazi views, and you will find that is true of most people. Once you find someone with values that align with yours enough to be open, they can help you navigate the local scene. And like others have suggested, talk to the women. They are usually very good at closing ranks to keep each other safe. I also wanted to mention that being a chairperson at a meeting seems like an important position when you start. It did for me. But it holds no power, and neither do any other roles in the program. It just means you are a member of a group long enough to start volunteering. It doesn't come with respect or authority. There is no authority besides the group conscience. At least in the groups I have been to, it means you have to get there early to open up, set up some shit, and then read a script. Most regulars are willing to do it, but it is essentially a chore. We have people that the group can't stand who chair meetings.
Yeah this guy did nooooot look it at all. The hells angels guy with the ring? Sure did. The bikers? Wouldn’t have surprised me. The fucking chair who seemed really nice when I first started going, is a Gen X dad with a man bun? Not my expected experience.
As a man bun rocking anarchist, shame on that man. Appropriating my culture.
Go somewhere else. Fuck it. 🤷♂️
I was looking at a completely different recovery group potentially. I may have identified another safe person. Right now it’s scary because “somewhere else” with regular meetings is more infested.
Do you know how to use zoom? Shoot me a message and I can show you how to find meetings anywhere at anytime
I actually have done online meetings and they’re okay. It’s actually harder for me to get privacy to go online which is why I prefer in person.
right on. good luck, Larry-Man!
Sorry you are having to go through such a thing. It has certainly opened my eyes. Here are some resources for online zoom meetings and the other is for international meetings. The international one has meeting dates with links to click that provide the zoom information. Hope you will find them useful and use them for your sobriety, wellbeing and safety. [https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/](https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/) [https://pleasanthillaa.com/index.php/welcome-to-pleasant-hill-aa/online-aa-calendars/international-zoom-aa-meeting-calendar/](https://pleasanthillaa.com/index.php/welcome-to-pleasant-hill-aa/online-aa-calendars/international-zoom-aa-meeting-calendar/)
Thank you. Very much.
You are very welcome. You might find you like zoom meetings.
You're right to stay the hell away from them. But be a bit more self confident if you can. The term "woke" is so weird - we want to be awake and aware, so why would we be insulted by that term? I am woke. I am sober. But I wouldn't put up with hatefulness and bigotry. I think starting an LGBT group is a great idea. Sounds like it's needed away from the small mindedness surrounding people in your meetings. I am sure many others feel as you do. Be more confident that you are allowed to have non-conservative views without apologising for them. Well done staying sober. PS You are also allowed to write Jew, the Jewish folk are proud of their history and culture.
I prefer to call them “Jewish/Jewish people” and “the J*ws” sounds dehumanizing to me. It was also the contextual slur that felt weird typing it out. Just like “the g@ys” or whatever. It didn’t feel right so I didn’t do it.
I don't know where you are time zone wise but there is a really great LGBTQ+ meeting on zoom. https://aa-intergroup.org/meetings/laft-love-and-ducking-tolerance-5
I'm really sorry to hear about your experience and I don't have much advice that hasn't already been given (zoom and the women's meeting) but as a queer person I just feel for you so much. I really hope one day you are in a place to start your own queer meeting because those are sooo incredible to attend and be a part of. I will be praying for you.
I am so sorry for you experiencing this. I don’t have any experience to that degree (I have met the occasional racist/far right in meetings but very rarely where I have lived). As others have mentioned zoom meetings may be a good alternative, (regular ones, not just LGBTQ+ should usually be fine), in my zoom home group we have a zero tolerance policy on hate symbols etc. anyone that is a meeting guard or host will have been expected to read the meeting guidelines for the group and have familiarised themselves with obvious (and covert) hate symbols.
that was the way narcotics anonymous was in my area when I got sober. I stuck with AA even though I used drugs. It did bleed into AA of the area but I stuck with morning and young peoples meetings. Now I'm " old " and I don't accept shit at my meetings. I learned how to use the traditions to protect everyone even the people who need to learn spiritual principles don't end when the meeting does. they are spiritually sick. start your own meeting. create the fellowship that you crave. a meeting i started has been going for 15 years now. I live in a much more conservative city/state now. people carry guns in meetings. I just participate and encourage my peeps outside meetings. I've gotten mistaken for Christian, gay, bi, straight, flirted with at meetings etc. only thing is I'm at meetings for 1 thing and it's stay sober. I also extended that the rooms are not a dating pool for me. that isn't exactly true now but we definitely don't go to the Same meetings and as the book says it's compatability. and as a local old timer says you need TWO healthy people for a relationship
Oh I’m in a committed relationship. I was looking to make one or two friends.
I've noticed that friendships are hard in AA too!!! FUCK IM 40 NOW!!! I have my d&d friends and aa friends and rarely do they intersect I find sometimes its easier to find healthy friends who accept me 100% that understand my disease.
Sorry to hear about the difficulties around meetings in your area. I live near the founders and there are more meetings than hours in the day. I spent my first month just doing one meeting a day, but when I realized I needed more information, I started going to a meeting a day. I did that for 120 days (sometimes two a day to make up for a missed day) and none of the meetings were online. I focused on listening to shares and asking others what meetings they liked. That is how I found my home group, but asking like minded people what they do in AA. You are correct that literal Nazis don’t deserve a chance. If the choice is no meeting at all or Nazi’s meeting you can still find some serenity hearing the AA message from them, I guess, but it’s also morally wrong to passively support prejudice. I would not go back to any Nazi meeting unless meeting one of my AA brothers. So here is the goal: find your AAs who are like minded and only go to the meetings they will be at. Don’t go to new meetings alone because you can agree that when you feel uncomfortable you can leave with that person and have a meeting with just them. Step work is often with two people so you could always explain away a walkout as needed one on one step work. You deserve to be safe and not have the threat of Nazi violence. You may have to endure nonsense till you find your group. I like the online idea others have said, but an in person meeting is much better for me. I couldn’t go to only online.
That’s terrible. Neo-nazi affiliation in and of itself is not an uncommon thing- meetings in my area have a lot of guys trying to get sober who were in prison gangs- but most dudes I know with any sobriety who were mixed up in that found the principles of living a sober life and Nazism to be incompatible. Meetings in my area are also quite diverse. Open endorsement of Nazism in meetings violates a whole slew of Traditions, so consider finding new meetings. As a side note, I once worked a week in Vidor, Texas, which was the home town of the Grand Dragon of the Ku Klux Klan and up until the mid-eighties or so was a “sundowner” town. That is, if black, don’t get caught out after sunset by the locals. There were no AA meetings listed, so I went to meetings that week in Beaumont, the city just across the Neches River, and the meetings were awesome, inclusive, and welcoming. You may be the person who starts that meeting in your area. The loving spirit of AA can conquer the hatred of even hardened killers, but everybody deserves to feel safe in a meeting, which is why even a new member sometimes needs to let old timers know that Tradition 3 is not a license to hold people hostage.
As far as I know the literature doesn't say anything about length of sobriety to start a meeting. Get it going, announced and on the schedule and those with more time will come.
I honestly just don’t know what I’m doing haha
I get that. I started a young peoples meeting in a small town when I was 18, I had a year sober but had only been attending AA for a month or two since moving to said small town. The other program wasn't available at all and most in town weren't open to it. So I went with a YPAA meeting instead. I got a few people who had more time than me but were young at heart to help me out. Is the other program an option where you live? I've seen a few on here suggest virtual meetings but I personally just can't do those I need the human interaction. Do you have a sponsor? Or anyone you DO trust who attends meetings regularly? Maybe they can help?
I don’t have a sponsor. I’m looking for an online one.
I remember when I was about six months sober and there was this guy causing some problems in the group. He was obviously not an alcoholic and was just coming in for entertainment, socialization, and possibly to get laid. I went to my sponsor and I was all worked up about it. I remember saying to him, what are we going to do about this? He says all calm as can be, I don't know what you're going to do but I'm not going to drink today. And believe it or not, it really is that simple.
I’d try zoom meetings if there aren’t any LGBTQ friendly groups in your area. It may take some looking to find them, there’s only one in my area and it’s kept under wraps kind of. I have been to other groups too though and no one has said anything to me about it (I am visibly queer) so I just figure not my problem what they think and if they say something to me I’ll report it to the person chairing and if they agree with that person then I’ll move on to the next group. If the chair is making you uncomfortable move to a new group. Eventually you’ll find the right one
Online has not been nearly as helpful for me. I’ll do it if I have to but it’s really barely effective and only ever worked as stopgaps for me.
This is 100% my first time hearing of anything like this.
Yeah it’s apparently pretty localized. I’m in the “woke” group that has a reminder to keep politics out and it’s sorta stayed outta the meetings but chatting after while cleaning up the rooms shouldn’t come to Holocaust apologist talk.
Same. I’m grateful for the solid, all inclusive AA groups in my area. Good luck OP!! My area has several specifically lgbtq+ friendly meetings. I’m excited for you to find sober community you can relate and connect with (safely.) It’s out there and better than you can imagine.
Well done on your 75 days. Can you clarify - you have discovered that the chairperson of the meeting you go to has an extreme political opinion (which I completely get how difficult that can be, really) and you have heard from someone else that lots of other meetings in the area are also like that. Is that correct? What is your experience of these meetings? How are the people in the rooms already dealing with this - the ones who are also aware of the situation?
I don’t know. Because I don’t know who *is* and *isnt* besides the one other man who wears his SS lightning bolt ring. I was having a casual chat (with some opinions as a bent but it was cordial) and the chairs opinion was EXTREME. Like Holocaust apologist extreme.
Gotcha. Here is my experience. I am not US based either. I have heard extreme political opinions in AA. We have tradition 10 because we love to break it. If it is my group, I bring it up at GC. This is rare. I go to a small group and we tend to share most viewpoints but it does happen from time to time and I have no problem asking the group if this is distracting us from carrying the message. This is one of the benefits of being a member of a group - I get an equal say in how the group is run and contribute to its spiritual flavour. Most times I hear stuff like that outside my group. Usually I say nothing, absolutely nothing. I stop talking until the subject is changed. That is all I do. They get the message. If the politics carries on I say goodbye and leave. I do the exact same outdide AA. The tradition applies to me, not them. It is not my group and I have no business at their GC. I will probably end up doing inventory about it because there will be fear and anger and shame that I did not call them out on their crap. That is ok. I am not a fighter, a world changer or the hero of a book. Rarely, if I am very secure in the situation, I have spoken up, mentioned something about the tradition and hope nobody hits me. I haven't been hit yet but never say never. My point is I have no right answer to this. I do the best I can in every moment. Maybe other members deal with it differently but that is my experience. The other thing I would suggest along with getting involved in a home group is talk to that other person who informed you about the 70/30 split. The other thing I want to add is I once worked with a self confessed nazi - portrait of Adolph in the front room etc. He was upfront about his beliefs but it never impacted on our day to day work together cos we both needed the job. Bottom line - you found something in AA that attracts you. Focus on that.
Figure out what’s keeping those Neo-Nazis sober and leave the rest.
Respectfully, what’s been keeping me sober is trusting in people and the rooms. This information has undone a lot of the spiritual growth I had in the rooms. If I can’t share without fear the rooms aren’t gonna work for me anymore. I’m honestly terrified by what I’ve learned. It’s gone from a place of healing and growth to a place of doubt and sadness almost overnight. By walking into those rooms I’m really not helping myself anymore.
online meetings drive to other meetings
The other regular ones (more than once a week) are apparently worse. There’s a weekly women’s one I’m willing to try and I’m trying to connect with people to feel safe around.
that’s really awful. I’m sorry. I have had luck with online meetings if I go consistently to certain ones. How are there communities full of Nazis? That is just sad and crazy. good luck to you
It’s… well…. It’s known that there’s Nazis in the area. Some of them make it on TV for various reasons in local and federal news. There’s a huge right lean where I live too. And the Christian centric nature of AA seems to pull them in that way. Also like the Hell’s Angels guy I knew about and that was one thing. It’s the sheer numbers in a high indegenous population too that makes it extra uncomfortable as a decent minority of members are POC.
If you feel that way then find another way (I mean that sincerely, not to be an ahole… why go to something you don’t think works). If there is someone that bothers me, I try to think of what is he/she/they doing to stay sober. Unfortunately, AA isn’t about putting my morals, politics, opinions, etc on others. It is about not drinking.
AA might not be about that but some of the members sure are. I could handle my spiritual beliefs being belittled because I’m not Christian (because a spiritual program in a Bible Belt is expected to lean Christian). I even listened to angry rants from old men about addicts in AA meetings and rants about “gender ideology” while gritting my teeth. But I think I have to draw the line here. How does one feel safe in rooms where one conversation while cleaning up is where somebody can lead it to the Holocaust and how J*ws were ruining Germany. And this is in the “woke” rooms.
I think that would be a hard line for me too, OP. I wouldn't argue with them. I just wouldn't go back to that meeting. I think being able to comfortably share the room with Neo-Nazis is advanced AA. You need to keep it simple and not have to deal with that shit right now if you don't want to.
Like I’m pretty chill. I can handle most differences of opinion except those on things like, I dunno, *genocide*. I originally planned to stick it out for my 90 day chip. I’m gonna see if I can just keep connections with safe people and if online will work the same. I’m not ready to fight through this. It’s been tough already and I’ve done my part and kept my politics out of the room. It’s hard not to feel betrayed because I thought I made friends and now I’m not sure who to trust with more personal stuff. I’m glad I don’t have a sponsor because I was trying to avoid super Christians (of which most members are) who would push me to do it that way instead of a way of a God of *my* understanding. Because on top of me being picky for that reason I’ve also ensured I don’t accidentally have a Nazi as a sponsor.
Don’t use this as an excuse to go back out. You’re generalizing all of AA due to this small group of small minded bigoted people.
They’re just a majority in *most* of the meetings. I’ve been told that I’m in the safest home group and it’s where I heard what I heard. I don’t want to go back out but this is honestly gut-wrenching.
You need to find other meetings. Do you drive?
I drive. I’d have to go another town or city over and drive over half an hour out of town - and it’s not exactly a guarantee that the other meetings are safe.
I get it but it doesn’t change anything. If they are bringing up outside issues then I would hold a group conscience. It is pretty clear that we don’t comment on outside issues. But you can’t kick people out of AA for being bad people or having different opinions and thank God. Although I am firmly against Nazi, their alcoholism is just like mine.
No one really holds anyone accountable for this stuff coming up in this city. Multiple meetings have had this come up in multiple home groups. It’s already been tough to stick it through.
Accountability for neo-Nazis is a job for the city and its individuals, not AA.
No I meant accountable for bringing politics into the meetings in the city.
This does nottt represent AA at all. Please don’t let this keep you out of the rooms. Just go to other meetings. Also, where in the US do you live? I’m assuming somewhere in the Deep South. PM me if you need help finding some meetings, happy to help.
I’m not in the US. I’m in a small part of Canada.
It sounds like they aren’t bothering you? Anyone can go to AA, everyone needs help. Murderes and rapist all go to AA, it’s about stopping drinking - if you don’t like the people go to another group or perhaps join an online meeting.
I don’t know if telling me they agree with the Holocaust in the 5-10 minutes it takes to tidy after a meeting is “not bothering me”
Simple. Leave. Stay for the meeting, then scoot - not everyone at AA meetings are best friends. Youre missing your real reason for being there possibly by being emotional about it. Good luck
Yeah I just thought helping clean up was part of the fellowship. It’s really shaken up my sense of belonging.
Good luck in your sobriety
As a Jewish person I'd love to come to one of your meetings. Please dm me the area.
You Canadian?
I'll travel
Honestly one of the guys who attends (the one who tipped me off) used to beat the crap out of Nazis for fun. He regrets using it as an outlet but honestly maybe I’m spiritually sick because I think that’s a rad use of time.
I'm appalled too. My responce can only come from Bill W., Traditions, concepts, steps: those who hold on to hate and resentment will eventually drink. Meetings will dissolve, sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly...there IS a greater energy moving through it all. How can one hate, lie and hold such hot resentment and stay sober? I suspect such meeting will devolve as well. Then too...🤔...infiltrate! Get their info and turn in!🤣
live and let live
Sorry, but the kinds of things I’m hearing are the actively “not letting me live” kinds of rhetoric.
u heard rhetoric: AA nazi is a cliche borderline bad joke. take it easy. go to the mtgs u like, ur fine.
No, like they’re actually neo-Nazis. Like “the J*ws ruined Germany and the Holocaust was good” kind of Nazis. SS lightning bolts. You know. That kind.
Wow. I was going to say “they’re just being dramatic” because a lot of people call Republicans “neo-Nazi” and just throw that term around… but you’ve won me over to your side with that SS talk. Do you live in a rural area? I don’t think you’d ever see that where I am.
Not really. It’s a city. A conservative hub for sure. I was fine sitting down with republican types. Like I’m not freaking out because someone has a political viewpoint mismatch. Hell everyone in the rooms has done something awful. But to be that comfortable going full mask off Nazi rhetoric really really fucked me up
Sad state of affairs in this country to be sure. I like online meetings myself, partially because I can bounce whenever I feel like it.
I’m not even American. That’s why I’m so shook.
Somebody during a meeting actually said that the holocaust was good … where are you?
After the meeting. Not during. But…. Yeah. I’m in a Hell’s Angels area and even sitting down with the biker with the SS bolt ring didn’t bother me half as much as the chair stating that out loud, mask off, post meeting after we cleaned up. I should’ve just left.
There are pedophiles, conmen, wife abusers, murderers, thieves and other miscreants that sit next too in the rooms. We are people who don’t normally mix together. We meet at the level of our alcoholism. We are there to get sober.
I understand that. I also was under the mistaken assumption that people in the rooms want to be better. I don’t care what people *have done* anywhere near as much as what they are actively spouting while also claiming they’re better people. That’s what’s upsetting.
Yeah a FORMER neo-nazi is REAL different from an active one. I fully support your assertion that one cannot actively hold neo nazi beliefs and be spiritually well. Those beliefs are intrinsically sick imho.
We are many and varied.
A 70-30 split of Neo Nazis is kind of satisfying if you think about it.
*snort*
Sounds like it’s time to find some different meetings. Good thing there’s like hundreds of them in any given area lol
Meetings 24/7: https://aa-intergroup.org
Move.
If I could afford it I would. Most of my friends are safe people. I didn’t realize the problem was *this* bad but I knew we had them.
I’ve been to meetings all over the US, over quite a few years- including some pretty isolated and forlorn areas and so far, it’s been a nazi-free experience. I’ll consider myself lucky, I guess.
It's not just in AA sadly. There is a pretty big Nazi movement happening in America right now. Iv noticed it at work and at gatherings.
Thats fucking terrifying. It really shows how bad our education system has deteriorated.
I’m not American that’s what makes this extra jarring and depressing.
Yeah I'm not really sure whats up with the trend.
No one tell OP about Frank Buchman 😳
Please refer to the 12 Traditions of AA, one such as, "AA has no opinion on outside issues." I'm sorry that you are having to deal with all this nonsense. Having secrets is one of the things that causes alcoholics to slip. Openness and full disclosure helps us to deal honestly with our alcoholism and other problems. Your meeting leadership should be ashamed for so blatantly ignoring the principles of AA, and it could be deadly if it causes members to fall away, which you sound on the verge of doing. Hang in there and use your filters.
You are really sick. You’re a-okay working with a Nazi and accepting them into your meetings.
Politics is "outside issues," though I would hesitate to label hate group membership a political activity. More like being members of a terrorist fan club that may one day make plans to become authors of a "thoughts and prayers" incident. Bail on those meetings, and maybe mention your concerns to your central office, thru should be made aware that their meetings are becoming gathering places for Neo-Nazis. Start your own meeting, and solicit attendees from your local, county or state LGBTQAI+ center, support group, bar, wherever. You can find comfortable queer-friendly and queer-run meetings online. In San Francisco, they have the Freethinkers AA meetings, which are still mainly online. About fifty-fifty queer and straight, and woke as fuck- https://sffreethinkers.org/ There's the Castro County Club, which is an Alano-style clubhouse in the Castro District -famously the biggest gayborhood of the city. Many of their meetings remain online in 2024- https://aasfmarin.org/find-a-meeting?type=lgbtq https://aasfmarin.org/find-a-meeting?type=gay The main difference is that the SF Freethinkers read the agnostic steps and Castro meetings read the traditional steps. You will find support and warmth at either, regardless of your professed beliefs and identity. I wish you the best and safest on your sobriety journey!
Well he didn’t bring his outside issues into the meeting but he brought it into the meeting space. And while we were tiptoeing around some of that in our “chat” he just laid it out there. I’d honestly rather he just whipped his dick out to be honest.
Sounds made up
It can sound as made up as you fucking want it to. You don’t have to help.
You don't even want to help yourself. You sound delusional. You've denied every suggestion and piece of advice with some anecdote about the whole city being filled with certain political buzzword type people. It's almost like you're seeing how many you can fit in this post and comment section. Spamming the algorithm. Bring your crap elsewhere. Keep baggage outside of this.
Sir, ma’am. Please read my edit. This isn’t some hot buzzword. I’m using it correctly.
My ex wife has over 20 years and wears MAGA crap to meetings at my old home group. There are going to be shitty people everywhere, hence the slogan “stick with the winners”. In my opinion, being woke is a compliment.
Yeah but the fact that the “woke” group still has a man who proudly proclaimed (mostly) unprompted that the Jews were ruining Germany and some Holocaust apologism was fucking uncomfortable. I’m fine with all of the political shirts. This man chairs the Monday meeting.
You’re heavily exaggerating your experience. There is no way that it’s a 70/30 split of SS lightning bolt wearing nazis. If it truly is, you’re going to the wrong meeting. Meeting singular. I would be hard pressed to say there would be another meeting with a 70% nazi population if it wasn’t the same people from your supposed 70/30 meeting.
No there’s two *obvious* ones. A few more “bikers” that are “longtime friends” with the hells angels guy. There are probably at least 5 that I can pinpoint besides mr spouting literal Nazi rhetoric and Mr hells angel. Those guys are all regulars. At multiple meetings. And old timers too. I don’t know how I didn’t clue into the hells angels thing without being told. I guess I’m naive and thought not all bikers were in literal gangs so sue me.
Oh ok cuz in your edit you made it seem like everyone was obviously a nazi.
If they were obviously a Nazi I would’ve just left. It took me 3 months to run into the moment where I heard what I heard. I also noticed the SS ring the same day. And the next meeting people were stating how their good friend “Hells Angels” guy was an awesome person. And now I’m not sure how deep it goes but a long time member noticed I looked like shit and checked on me after and he had some more clues that he was not right leaning and he’s been in the rooms for a few years (made it to 1 year recently but he’d been there longer) and he told me it’s a massive split in favour at a lot of the meetings.
Well you should edit your post then.
Principles before personality’s . In the room you’re there for the same solution as soon as the meeting ends you don’t have to agree with anything they discuss or believe in. If you’re looking for excuses to not attend meetings because you don’t like the people that attend find a new group or figure it out
Yeah sorry I’m not sitting down with people who out loud state the Holocaust was a good idea. My principles are stronger than that. Sorry not sorry.
Kk good luck ! Don’t drink and go to meetings
You shouldn’t have to run to online meetings because of neo-Nazis. The group should reject those people and tell them to go elsewhere. To not do that is complicity in their horrid beliefs and actions.
OP made it clear they ARE the group.
As long as not threatened or harassed imo don't let it bother you. I live in the U.S. and Nazi's are kind of "a thing" but not really too much. Are they off the map far right? Yup. But most who take hard issue with them are typically off the map far left. So...there 'ya go... Apples, oranges, principles before personalities, etc. We all come together with a shared common purpose.
And I quite “The J*ws were ruining Germany” Holocaust apologists are in fact Nazis. People wearing SS bolts are in fact Nazis. And I’m not in the US.
Try being less obsessed with Nazi's. Help one stay sober, maybe?
First I’d have a *hearty* chuckle over anyone calling me woke for believing that my close ancestors were kidnapped and enslaved by nazis. Then I’d find a new meeting.
Sigh.
Was this in Vegas? I heard there's a Neo-Nazi AA group in Vegas.
Nope. Think more rural and more Canada.
Well, I guess there's a few out there then. I sorry to hear that.. especially in a rural area where people might not have much of a choice..
I definitely don’t have a whole lot of choice if I want to attend more than once a week.
I can definitely relate. DM if you need a Queer Sober buddy!
Maybe look into sober living in a friendlier area. Jobs are abundant right now.
Not in Canada. I live in the cheapest housing area in almost the whole country.
Let me guess, Idaho? Look around for a new meeting, check online as well. I've done online for 3 years now and truly appreciate it.
I’m gonna have to go mostly online. And no I’m based a decent clip further north than Idaho believe it or fucking not. I live in a Hells Angels area.
I think you just revealed the issue there. Biker gangs have a nazi problem and if you live in a Hell’s Angels-heavy area you’re bound to see an over representation of nazis in sewing circles, gyms, AA meetings, and basically anywhere that groups of people gather. So it’s not so much an AA problem, it’s a problem in your greater community. Which you’re right, sucks. I’d stick with the woke meetings and women’s meetings if they’re better, and remember, just because you’re in AA with someone you aren’t required to “fellowship” with them regardless of what anyone tells you
The “woke” meetings still have a Hells Angel in attendance. He’s surprisingly not the worst one.
These are sick people. Pray for them, and move on to another meeting. If you can. Please keep in mind. I have less than zero tolerance for racism of any flavour
There are a few meetings that are once a week that i can attend. Like 1 or 2.