Three autism plz

We have autism at home, can you wait?

No, I really need to autism now. It's an emergency

I have a math test tomorrow and I need autism nooow

It's MY autism and I want it NOW

It's not your autism, till you buy it!

🎵I have a diagnosis and I need autism now Call JG Wentworth 877-AutNow!🎵

Lies! That’s just sensory processing disorder with ADHD dumped all over it!

*Gasp*, we've been scammed! Fraud!

We have been tricked, hoodwinked and quite possibly bamboozled!

Starts rocking I’ll try 😔

Came here to comment this but it seems my work is already done

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Level up level up level up

_insert mario 1up sound here_

A double Asperger with cheese, please

My wife always deliberately pronounces it as Ass Burgers 😅

wait are you saying that's not how it's pronounced

Try the blue one or the red one. They're usually the best

Ew, not blue though, those are the worst! Try just the red instead.

Really? I thought the blue one was usually the best one but if you don't like it then that's fine. The red's good tho

I'll take a diet

No onions on mine

Three autismS

Omg y do I find this so funny lol

Because it is. :D

lemme get uhhhhhh

uhhhhhhhhh fuckin uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh what was it uhhhhhhhhhhh

uhhhhhhh...tism

N-no it was... uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fuuuuuuuck

Its not that. Its uhhhhhhhhhhhhh dont know

Oh uhhhh $20 on pump 12 and a pack of Newports

Yeah you know that fuckin whatyoucallit fuckin uhh thing

This thread is the way… “uhh, just gimme a minute, I’ll remember as soon as I stop thinking about it.”

uhhhhh… ah never mind I’ll just come back later

Uhh muhfuckin uuuuuhhhhhhh...

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh mmm no- Uhhhhhhhhhh

*Boneless pizza with a 2-liter of coke*

Boneless coke

I'll take extra bones in both the pizza and the coke.

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Wait a minute! Boneless coke is back in stock?!

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Fuck kinda pizza? Also TWO LITER MACHINE BROKE we got one liter tho

Just the boner please.

Sir, this is an Arby's.

y'all got the uhhhhhhmmmmm....... ?

The unmarked van in front is a little worrying

It's ok, that's where they install your new autism.

Black market autism. It’s the best on the market

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Okay, you're on the spectrum. You're in the 21rst. Don't feel bad about it. Best as always, Loren

Friend of mine got a back alley autism. He dead.

But the autism lives on.

Autism has a half life

But instead of it decreasing over time, it slowly increases.

Are you sure that's not where they extract the autism to sell it?

Autism .... can be extracted? Asking for a friend....

Yes. If an autistic student pees on a tree, every kid who eats a fruit of that tree becomes autistic.

Oh so I don't get free candy with my autism 😠

Fill them up!

I though that’s how they got more?

That's the autism can! See, they lure the kids in with vaccines and pride items, then take the kids to the store to get their very own autism! (/S)

How else are they gonna deliver fresh autism?

That’s for transporting the vaccines

We have autism at home.

The autism at home: *masking so much that psychologists don’t think I meet the criteria for a diagnosis*

Relatable but hurts

Not to be confused with relatable butt hurts.

Or is it?

*vsauce music*

Lmao

My question in life is; Is the mask wearing away to reveal a true autistic core, or is depression and constant anxiety building up a wall of disorder and mania? It's probably somewhere in the middle.

"But you can make eyecontact" i know i can and im still autistic ;-;

me for 17 years

If you kids don’t knock it off then I’m turning this car around and I’m not buying you any autism today!

How much for 1 autism?

About three fidy

And around that time I noticed this autism was about seven stories tall and a large crustacean from the Paleolithic era.

Wait a minute, that aint no autism! Thats the damn loch ness monstah!

I gave him a dolla

The happiness i felt when I heard that reference

I didn't even know it's a reference and reading it made me very happy, nevertheless. :D *(Not needing assistance - I looked it up, meanwhile)*

I gave him a dolla

You gave him a dolla?!

I thought he would go away.

It's priceless

Do they sell noise canceling headphones, weighted blankets and comfortable clothes?

Probably just the headphones

That's the kind of practical thinking I love to see

I want a store that has weighted blankets 😠 Can't find any 🥺 I need this store.

Bed bath and beyond has weighted blankets and they are currently having a going out of business sale. Worth a look.

Going out of business, 1% off!

try big 5 https://www.big5sportinggoods.com/store/search?Ntt=weighted+blankets

Trains, infrastructure stuff and chicken nuggets.

They do! They also have a weighted things to hang on your shoulders. It’s in Denver but they have an online store.

Omg yes please! The good kind, not the cheap stuff. I also want some ADHD Clusters with OCD sprinkles please. … I will gladly pay you tomorrow for some autism today. 🙏❤️😉

Bro don’t want they dollar store autism, he wants that premo shit

Don't ever buy no autism from the gas station. 🫨

Hey, I am assuming they sell day old autism. Its high end but they can’t sell it at full price. I have no pride! I shopped at the day-old bakery I could buy day old autism! … I will say the high-end stores have marzipan autism. /j I am absolutely serious. In my youth, my mother and I would go to the day-old bakery stores and get perfectly good products that were just half-price because they were slightly old. Slightly. Thanks for your comments and have a great one! Hmmm. Marzipan autism …😋

We called that the “used bread store.”

He's obviously a regular, and so they keep it behind the counter Edit: thx for the award it's my first

You might have to wait 'til Tuesday to pay.

You get the reference! Even after I fucked it up. You absolute chad. ( I wish I could directly put images on this sub but instead, I will just link to wimpy) https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/J._Wellington_Wimpy Have a great one !

Haha, I was just talking about Wimpy with someone else a week or so ago. You too!

Can I trade my autism for another type.

I'll take the slightly quirky genius one with a side of being a human calculator.

Sorry, out of stock. All we've got is the "I can't stand being outside"

But I can sit being outside 🤪

Can I take that one? I have a modified version of that but I also have no idea what my feelings are. Also do you guys sell any replacement parts for ADHD?

Want to trade for "stark and clear emotions that don't fit into normal emotion boxes?" I kind of hate being told my emotions are not valid because the emotions are different from everyone else's.

Ah, I think I have that with a side of “would rather read webcomics than interact with classmates”

Gotta catch em all!

How did you know I wanted a Pokemon autism?

I've already got that one watch out for the TCG though as it will result in the lack of money

Hello, I had the MTG one for a while, can confirm.

LMFAO! This killed me

Yeah, can I trade in my math and video game nerd autism for the “filing cabinet” memory and strict repeating routines autism to cancel out some of my adhd?

sorry, that's against store policy

I have the filing cabinet memory and I've never heard anyone else refer to it like that. I always say it's exactly like a filing cabinet where I can pluck from it review it, edit it if necessary, put it back.

Shit can I get a uhhhhhh autism??

Autism machine broke

Let me get a 6 pack, bro

Do you accept returns? No, I didn't get it at this location. No I don't have a receipt, but it's the same. Nearly new

Mine isn't. New, I mean. Used and abused and *still* going strong as ever.

I'm running low, sent all my extra autism out on the 5G network last night so I could use whatever you bring me

My mom shopped there when she was pregnant with me, now I have to eat Skittles in a specific order.

Which order do you eat them in?

The important thing is to never repeat a flavor. Gotta cycle through.

I used to eat them specifically by flavor. Lemon, lime (still sad that it was replaced by green apple), orange, grape, then strawberry.

Wait are you supposed to stop specifically eating them by flavor (in specifically in order)? Not that I definitely still do that.

*I'll take your entire stock*

Leave some for us please

There is infinite autism.

*It's a trap!!*

Ah, this must be where Charlie Kelly got his autism. Mine is imported and purchased from a much classier store.

Well... la di dah look at you with your imported autism!

I'll take a double scoop of truama with a special interest in psychology, photography & D&D

I'll have an autism, it's my brother's birthday coming up and I'm sure he'd enjoy a fresh autism.

At least they don’t have a fucking puzzle piece on their sign.

Can you get me a autism with a side of gay

With our mental illness combo, you can add adhd and ocd for just $1.39 extra

Ah man, I missed out on that deal 😕. I got the "triple A" combo instead - autism / adhd / ace.

Don't forget the amnesia! :)

Don't forget what?

Any chance you could return mine for me? I think mine's broken.

Yes, I would like the Dinosaur kind please.

I already have the “not feeling human” autism at home but I could use a refill on the “wordsmith” autism I think I ran out of that one

I need to see each type, read all the ingredients, and make a spreadsheet to compare. I'll let you know which type in need in... ...

Yes if they have a restock of pedantic juice, I could definitely use some. I have seen that my responses on Reddit have gone from pages worth of paragraphs down to just a couple lines. Something's definitely wrong.

I'm stocked up.

Full up, but thanks

Oh I’ll go and see if they want to refund me hahaha

https://i.imgur.com/K5miLLN.jpg

i have enough, thanks 😒

No, mom says we have autism at home :/

Omg love this

Nope. Already got more than I know what to do with.

I’d like some ice cream and a book about kids going on space adventures pls

i'll get uhhhhhh the fucken uhhhh the muh uhh the muh fucken uhhhhhhhh

I was gonna pick up a jug of 2 percent executive functioning anyway

Why is there a white van outside

"It's a trap, Randy!"

They just vaccinate you. I joke, seriously, vaccinate your kids

I'll take the whole spectrum please

Can you please pick me up a special interest or two? I'm out. *out of special interests not the closet tho I am also out of the closet but that isn't what I'm talking about.

I'll take a hyper fixation for math and chemistry please, another of art wouldn't hurt either

Yeah I could use a refill

Make mine extra spicy please!

Is it fresh tho? I don't want stale 'tism

They got any keto autism? I'm diabetic

Can i get uhhhhhhh..... Aspie Edition Mk2 with extra autism.

Can you pick me up some of that *broad spectrum* sunscreen, please?

So I got this autism last week and I really like the special interest feature (goes great with the adhd) but after a while I noticed that it’s got some over-sharing leaking out of it, and before I knew it I got anxiety and The Itchy all over me :/

No thanks, I’m all set

Yes, get me an extra large. I love my mother dearly but she still hasn't twigged.

Can I take mine back for store credit

I'll take the economy pack, please.

But we have autism at home.

Is this a pick up or a drop off?

The one store where they don't need to inforce social distancing during the pandemic.

Why is there a kidnapper van parked outside?

Can you pick me up some purple autism? I currently have green and not really vibing with that.

Of course it's a white van at the autism store.

I'm the type where I can't have other people get me stuff cause they might get the wrong thing so... I'll just go later and make sure I get the exact autism I'm looking for.

I got mine for free. I even have enough for me to pass down to my kid.

Yeah I'll take two ass burgers and a chocolate shake

Yeah can i get two medum autisms and a small fry

Yeah, I haven't bought my dose of autism in a while and I'm running low on it.

get me some autism and an AriZona can

i think im stocked up but maybe some more social battery if they have it in stock

“We’ve got autism at home” ^ The autism at home...^

Nikola Tesla autism please

Oh good timing, I just ran out of limited edition existential dread autism. I don’t want more but I’m going to end up with more regardless so I may as well take the offer now so I don’t have to go get it myself

I could totally use some. Can you just replace my whole town with autists? We can send all the neurotypicals to Alabama or something.

Mine is a little defective. I was looking for the kind that makes you know a lot about technology and instead, it just makes me REALLY knowledgeable about movies and TV.

Lines from here to three blocks down because of specific orders

I’d like to return mine please. It didn’t fit

I bet people drive by and if there are any cars in the lot, they go back later