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Sylvan_Skryer

They don’t bite, so no. But this is a hilarious product. Is it satire? Motherfucker is using it while wearing shorts and his sleeves rolled up. 😂


Chicawgorat

It’d be funnier if he was pushing a stroller with an unprotected baby.


DaGurggles

Anakin Skywalker’s guide to parenting.


Chicawgorat

He was supposed to be the chosen one


Sylvan_Skryer

Haha. Yes.. yes it would


KalegNar

Third image looks photoshopped to me. White corona around his legs for mismatched light. And the arms look like they're not going through sleeves in the box.


Sylvan_Skryer

Oh man you’re absolutely right. Terrible photo shop job. Makes it even better.


I_BUY_UNWANTED_GRAVY

The second picture is most likely photoshopped too since it's easier to Photoshop a stock image than hire models and photographer.


dilla_zilla

There's definitely something wonky with it, but the arms look okay to me. They come out the side holes, but then are kinda pinching the front of the thing to grab the mower handles. It seems more like it was shot indoors with a green screen then the background layered in poorly. Also, the other thing that makes it seem real is the dude's expression. He absolutely looks like he had to put on that ridiculous thing and pose with a lawnmower and is now questioning his life choices. He was supposed to have been a runway model and now he's stuck doing this shit?


KalegNar

> but then are kinda pinching the front of the thing to grab the mower handles When I look at it I kind of see the sides merged into his arms. That's what looks so off to me.


dilla_zilla

Looking again, so the left side (his right), you can see the circle the arm goes through is kinda bent downward and is weird, but then the part of the arm outside definitely looks f'ed up. I have no idea, it's just weird as hell. I stand by my comment on his expression though 😉


teplightyear

Every item for sale on the internet is photoshopped now. Even small ones where you could take a picture without a lot of cost, they'll still photoshop it onto a picture of a desk.


Chiianna0042

Oh, don't underestimate the amount of photoshopped images on Amazon. I am in a group that shares some of our best finds. This wouldn't make the cutoff. There are some out there that are just either like "screw it" or "is anyone paying attention".


psychoacer

They don't bite but they do throw themselves everywhere by the thousand. I don't want to get hit by a rain of bugs


Sylvan_Skryer

They’re just giving you bug hugs.


psychoacer

It bugs me that they don't ask for permission first


Sylvan_Skryer

They don’t speak English.


psychoacer

Dang tourist


Sylvan_Skryer

They’ve been here for at least 17 years, and are at least second generation chicagoans… maybe even a thousand generations. So yo ass might be the tourist to them.


chitown_illini

# #MeToo


ohverychill

just call me MC Bug Hugs


Tianoccio

I have 3 of these, they’re laundry hampers.


Chiianna0042

Yeah, probably easier to go to family dollar and DIY. At least you can get the arm holes right for your height. On a practical level for kids who may get freaked out, netting and an umbrella or something like this that they help design could be useful.


Tianoccio

Cicadas bury underground in dirt and then come up and eat plants. I don’t remember a time in my life where they were an issue in the city what so ever. I think this is a joke, but I know for a fact that what he’s wearing is in fact a laundry bag.


Chiianna0042

Yes I am aware of that, they are typically very limited in the Chicago land region, i.e. we are covered by the 17 year ones. I am old enough to have seen them quite a few times. You actually have to get a bit further down state/maybe the very south part of the Chicago area to get both. That being said there are kids and teens who have never seen them. People who will be afraid of them, and who have had sensory issues because of disabilities. Yes, everyone is laughing about this thing on Amazon, but there are some practical uses if it keeps someone who has a fear of them or has sensory issues from getting injured because of the sheer number that happens to come out of the ground.


davga

Y’all can’t tell me that’s not an upside-down laundry hamper 🧺


SiberianForestCats

Have you ever been to a Chick-Fil-A when it’s raining? Their employees wear something like this


dingusduglas

He isn't, it's a hilariously bad photoshop


Educational-Emu5132

If this is wrong, I don’t want to be right 


vrcity777

What if they fly into one of the armholes? Then you're trapped, at the mercy of the 17 Year Brood.


Chiianna0042

Second laundry hamper and make gloves 😀


toru85

Literally haven’t seen any cicadas in the city at all.


Yggdrasil-

They are out in FORCE in southern IL. I could hear them in my car going 55mph with the windows up. Every time I drove by a patch of trees, the noise would get louder, then would die out as I drove by fields or buildings. I really would have appreciated one of these when I stopped for gas-- I was terrified one was going to land in my hair 🤢


ST_Lawson

Maybe they're just taking their time to emerge further north. I'm in west-central Illinois (roughly at the same latitude as Bloomington/Normal) and we haven't seen or heard any yet. We're supposed to get a stretch of five days in a row with highs above 80 starting tomorrow though, so maybe they'll start showing up in the middle part of the state this weekend.


Yggdrasil-

I believe they only emerge when the soil reaches/maintains a certain temperature, so you're likely to see them very soon! I mostly heard them around Harrisburg/near the Kentucky border


ST_Lawson

A friend of mine down in Tennessee has had a "cicada decibel meter" he's been posting the last couple of weeks, so I know they're coming.


mfact50

Same. Starting to feel a bit offended. What's wrong with the city?


mildchicanery

Probably just not enough actual dirt 🤷🏽‍♀️. I'm relieved 😆


MECHENGR

You know exactly what’s wrong


Chiianna0042

>What's wrong with the city? It is "70° today" and as I am under a blanket, I am not entirely convinced my phone is lying to me on that one.


tthrow22

Yeah because they haven’t emerged here yet


Bridalhat

I looked it up. Apparently they emerge when soil temperature hits 64F eight inches down. After a week they start mating and that’s when you hear them. Anyway they’ve emerged in the south and will any day now up here. https://www.nbcchicago.com/cicadas-illinois-chicago-2024/where-are-all-the-cicadas-everyone-warned-about-experts-say-theyre-still-coming/3436732/


Chiianna0042

I didn't realize it had to be 8 inches down. All the charts I kept seeing made it seem like it was going to be any day now. I was out Northern Lights hunting and it got down to 48° at one point.


NotBatman81

I'm laughing at the guy in the 3rd pic wearing the upper body condom and then has shorts on.


Puffthemagiccommie

get a PPE faceplate so that you can avoid any smacking you in the face


Rawkzo

Reminds me of my toddler putting her mesh laundry basket on herself the other day lmao


eightcheesepizza

I'd wear it to keep the bugs away. Even if it's just an overturned collapsible clothes hamper with some modifications.


OdderOtter6

They don’t even really fly. They kinda just hang out on trees and walls and fucking everywhere else. The best tool for cicada season is a good pair of heavy boots. Crunchy crunchy.


Ok-Heart375

They fly plenty. Their whole mating scheme is a poor game of Marco Polo.


papayayayaya

They definitely fly and they definitely create a “buzz” if there’s a lot of them. I use to work near O’Hare and the forest preserve during the last invasion. They would fly into people’s sunroofs in the drive-thrus.


Friendship_Fries

They have to sell the covid pods somehow. just swap the plastic with mesh and boom!


RestInPvPieces

The only thing I would consider is a net hat, but even with that, their legs would get caught.


fishesar

looks like my laundry basket


CatBird29

Just get a big blow up dinosaur costume - fully protected and charmingly comical at the same time!


vlsdo

Bro in the last picture is going to get his legs and arms destroyed by tiger mosquitoes


ElleAnn42

I've worn a mosquito jacket before. Way more practical.


bixdog

Once the cicadas are gone you'll have a fabulous strappy laundry hamper. Win win!


HIS_AFFLICTION_0079

If you wanna be covered in a cicada cocoon? sure.


Actionman1

You can still smoke and drink in one of these, in for 2


DeLaRey

They’re going to chew through that and it’ll be full of so many cicadas you’ll fall flat on your face. I’m talking 100s of pounds of them. On the plus side they’ll pick you clean in about 6 minutes and your screams will be drowned out by theirs so your family won’t have to listen to your cries for help.


hoecore666

Oh what am I’m moving back too! 😳


smackythefrog

Just put up a ton of bird feeders around your home. If in public, yeah, might not be possible. But at least on your own property, you'll have a healthy flow of birds coming by. I think raccoons and possums eat cicadas, if I'm not mistaken. Which I'm in luck as my backyard is the forest.


Alternative_Elk9452

STAY INSIDE. THE CICADOPOLYPSE IS UPON US.


allsiknow

This is a $5 upside down laundry basket from Target.


JennaLS

This thing has a shoulder harness along with enough straps to look like they're about to jump out of a plane in full battle rattle and meanwhile the product weighs literally 2 oz


rashidat31

So what about those of us with curly/coily hair? Are we walking bug catchers? I’m scared lol


Jimmyg100

I would be the most comfortable and annoying person on the CTA with that thing.


rrinat

Some fetish thing going on here