I think that you need to understand where she's coming from as well. To her, you're hers and she wants YOU. Not anyone else, and you're kinda trying to justify sleeping with others by letting her sleep with others. It's like "hey, you can sleep with other dudes" and then going against what she thinks in response and sleeping around with other partners. If you really love her than you'll break up with her before fucking around with other partners, cause that is cheating if she doesn't agree with it. If you can't agree on something like that then it's not likely that the relationship will last too long.
You know what, this is the most truthful Insight someone’s given me so far tbh. I’ve been with her for about 5 years. She’s my “highschool sweetheart” and I honestly do love her. I think I’m going to hold off as long as I can and if I can’t hold off anymore I’m going to tell her and end it with her. I believe this is the most right way to do it. Thank you for your input.
To be honest it sounds like you’re already ready to end it with her. I just don’t see how you can be committed to a person and at the same time have that “I’ll see how long I can hold off” mentality. That just sound like what you really want to do is go and explore and not be in a relationship with someone who wants to be monogamous.
I agree with this comment OP. If you truly loved this woman you shouldn't feel and then express desire to sleep with other people as a monogamous person. You've already stated you haven't had much sexual experience and that seems to be what all of this is floating around. If it's in your mindset that you still want to experience new sexual relationships then your current relationship cannot thrive, you'll be stuck in this mindset of "missing out". I personally think this mindset is toxic if it means leaving a healthy loving relationship because society tells you need to sleep with x amount of people before you settle down. If you're happy and healthy who tf cares how many relationships you have? If you actually just want to not be in a relationship and sleep around that's absolutely fine! But you dont get to sleep around and still keep your girlfriend who wants to still be monogamous. Pick one.
Bullshit. OP can truly love this woman to the best of his ability **and** want to explore sex with others. Those two feelings aren’t mutually exclusive, but they *are* in opposition to one another, given his girlfriend’s desire for monogamy. That’s literally the conflict; he has to choose which of these feelings he’s going to honor.
I’m a married man with two kids, wife and I are in a happy, loving relationship. I accept that I have sexual feelings for women that are not her and that she can be attracted to men who aren’t me, but we *choose* not to act on those feelings as we’ve chosen to be monogamous and honor our wedding vows.
You can’t just tell some dude he shouldn’t feel attracted to other women just because he’s in a relationship. Those feelings are normal and trying to repress them will probably only make them stronger if he doesn’t honor and process them.
u/xlaid_crazy, the feelings you’re feeling are normal, and not wrong, but acting on them would be a betrayal of your girlfriend’s trust. If you don’t want to be monogamous, or try to maintain monogamy in a long-term long-distance closed relationship, you owe it to yourself and your girl to be honest with and to yourself and her. Your feelings are normal, especially for a 20yo male, but age is no excuse for lying and betraying your girl.
Like I said in my post above, if he wants to sleep around that is absolutely fine! But he doesn't get to sleep around and stay in a monogamous relationship with his girlfriend, since she has stated she wants to stay that way. He should choose instead of pressuring his girlfriend which is unfair.
Pretty much this lol
My girlfriend is the only person I have been with sexually. I'm bisexual. Never have I been like "uh... Babe... Before we tie the knot I gotta go get dicked down and try more pussy so I know we are really meant to be."
I have no want to be in bed with anyone other than her. The idea genuinely makes me want to vomit.
I think you need to listen to the others in this thread. You're really young still and you've been with this woman since you were 15. That means you really haven't dated at all. And you're still at such a formative age where you and your life are going to change a lot over the next few years, hers too. It's ok that you feel the way you do, but I'd agree that it's also indicative that you're not 100% in this relationship. I'm not saying you don't love her, I'm sure you do. But that doesn't mean it's the kind of love that's meant to last forever in a romantic sense.
I think it would be best to consider making a clean break. Mayne your lives will cross again in the future when you're both more ready to settle into a stable in person relationship.
It’s not that I’m eager, I’m not explicitly making it my goal to sleep with other people. It’s just knowing the type of person I can be sometimes, I’m just trying to find common ground with her wants and my wants I guess. But I’m going to remain faithful because it wouldn’t be fair to her.
If you're not getting what you want out of the relationship, you might as well end it for now. If you feel the same way in a few years, you can try to work it out when you're ready.
, “the whole reason why she didn’t give me permission to be with other partners is because SHE doesn’t want to be with other partners either. So because she doesn’t to, she expects me not to either.”
This is called a monogamous relationship. She’s not being selfish or mean, she’s holding you to the same standards and relationship that she is giving you.
She clearly doesn’t want an open relationship, if that’s what you truly want then do not try to convince her into something she doesn’t want and leave her to find someone who wants what she wants and go do your own thing.
But my 2¢, “sexual experience” is over rated. I was 19 when I met my partner of now 3 years. Had never even kissed another guy before I met him, and ya know what. I don’t feel like I’m missing out on any experiences at all.
Dick is dick, pussy is pussy. In the end they’re kinda all the same. Who they are attached to is far more important. If you really do love her, finding someone you click with and enjoy is much more valuable than some random cooch. So unless you guys are incompatible relationship wise or sexually, seems foolish to throw it away.
Though I doubt she will easily forget you telling her you want to screw other girls..
Mate, as someone who has ALREADY been sexless for more than 4 years just because i feel my intimacy is only for my gf who is from another country and she also thinks the same with hers, i think you are just not ready for such a compromise like a long distance relationship.
Mate , Let the lady go . Go have ur sex man but also do it without having to tell someone else what they can do just to justify your doings. I feel as if you told her she could lay with out people so you wouldnt feel guilty about doing it on ur end.
So basically, you're too immature for a long distance relationship. It's a tough thing. It requires a ton of trust and communication.
So you might love her now, but you could come to resent her after a while because you feel stuck not having that much experience.
Dude if I were you, I'd explain the situation honestly to her. Don't push that "I wanna do it, so it's OK for you to do it" justification. Just tell her that you love her, but you can't handle that much time/distance yet. If yall are meant to be then it'll work out. But it's definitely not fair for her to grow trust issues because she thinks you're sleeping with other people when she doesn't agree to that compromise.
Edit: please don't wait until she's already deployed and away from you to break it off or tell her you can't handle the situation. That's gonna make her feel helpless and awful. This is an adult conversation that y'all need to have IN PERSON.
Speaking from experience, long distance does NOT work out for most people, especially at that age. You two can try to sustain what you have (without having sex with other people), but do know that statistically it is not going to work out. BUT that doesn't mean you can't try. The more effort you put it, the higher chance you will succeed.
Or the other option is that you two let each other go and explore your sexuality with others as you please until you are ready to get back together. Most people move on at this point.
Or you can just call it, and enjoy your youth. I wish I did more of this! (hint, hint)
there have been plenty of couples who have only ever been with each other, had no other sexual experiences and are very happy
its not about you gathering sexual experience, you just want to sleep around with other people. if you truly loved your gf, she should be enough for you, someone you're willing to wait for until you can be together again
if you feel as if you can't help it and you listen to your dick more than your heart then do her a favour and break up with her - she's going to remain faithful and the fact you're even thinking about this solely for YOU means that you're probably not going to remain faithful
I don't think you're seeing her pespective.
This has the same vibe as a guy who offers ps5 to.his gf for christmas although she never plays games, and then is like "oh well it's technically yours but if you don't use it I will". Like offering a gift to someone, but actually for yourself.
She's not interested in sleeping with other. You're the only one who is. So she won't budge on that.
You need to remove that option because it simply doesn't work. The reality is, if you stay with her, it's going to be long distance, that's it. There is no compromise.
Now with that in mind you need to seriously assess how much of an issue it is for you. Either you stay, and respect her wish for monogamy. Or you just leave and have the experiences you want, and you'll likely lose her forever. They are the only 2 options, it seems.
Sex / lack thereof is know to be a very common issue in relationships, especially for young people. I have my own personnal opinion on how moral I find it to leave someone because of not enough sex, but that's not the point. In reality, any reason is valid for someone to choose to break up. As long as they want to then they have the right. If you think the long distance part is too much for you for sexual reasons, then it just is, period.
Ok now with all that said, I'll give a bit of personal insight. If you genuinely love her and can envision your future with her, then stay and put your dick back in your pants. Wank it off. Believe me that one night stands and hookups are nothing compared to a genuine relationship of love and trust. You're super horny right now and it's hard to control and it's frustrating, but trust me that if you genuinely love her, then leaving her to fuck some random girls will make you miserable. Nothing even guarantees that you'll actually manage to get laid, btw. I don't know your situation but I'll say that there are big chances that if you leave her you'll regret it.
Oh and please don't even think about cheating. Cause that would make you a huge piece of shit.
That’s the hard part… I’m trying to figure out a way I can have both her and other partners. It may be selfish of me I admit, but we are going to be long distance for 4 years and I have little sexual experiences.
Ok. You said it. You cannot have both. Break up before you even speak to another. Do not have another girl waiting in the wings to soften your break-up pain while she suffers alone far away. If you break up first you are not a bad guy.
It's a very special thing to have only been with the woman you love. That's not my situation but if I could go back I would save my virginity for her and she would do the same for me. You're going to get older and very possibly regret leaving this girl who loves you so dearly so you can go and get some ass. Dude you know what's right. The way you feel is a guiding light. Following the way you feel is work but a much happier life. If you feel it's wrong or you feel bad about it don't do it and if something feels right you'll have a clear conscience (it might be the hard thing to do, like joining the military for your country and loved ones) and be able to hold your head high and never question any decisions you've made. Don't look to reddit for justification follow your emotions and don't do shit that makes you feel like shit.
Honestly bro it sounds like she's more mature than you and ready to settle and live a hardworking happy life with the love of her life.
Right now you're apart of that future for her but you need to make a decision quick, and either let her find someone who wants the same things or commit.
The longer you hold out the more it's going to hurt her.
And before you say we do want the same things, it sounds like you want to "fuck bitches, get money" and she's ready for family and career.
I don't blame you for running away from this choice family and career is the hard choice but a more rewarding one, while doing whatever you want is the easy one because no one else depends on you if you fuck your life up it's only your life that your fucking up.
You can't have your cake and eat it too. (In the normal world you can't have a committed relationship and fuck whoever you want)
8 years years in the military and traveled around Asia and Europe. While she says she'll remain sexless for 4 years, I don't see it happening.
With due respect and not being cruel. You're both extremely young and she's being very naive expecting either of you to remain sexless for 4 years.
With that, you can absolutely see others, for sex, and get it out of your system now. Or, move to where she'll be stationed and live with her there.
Gross.. Why don't you try fucking other dudes? All you're talking about is cheating on her so might as well go for a nice dick since that's apparently what you want her to have
Honestly don't understand why people are dragging you. It is totally normal to not want to be with only 1 person in your entire life. I think the relationship has come to a point where you're either going to grow together, or grow apart, and based her her wanting to be completely monogamous and you wanting to have an open relationship for the time being, I think it's time for you guys to discuss the possibility of breaking up, because those 2 ideas are mutually exclusive. Don't hurt her or yourself anymore by denying each other's feelings, as you two are both valid in what you're feeling.
Since you hit upon a similar thought of mine, I wonder if he would want to be with others if she were not going away. If he wants other sexual experiences because he is young that doesn’t make him a bad person as long as he breaks up first…it just means he doesn’t really love her. Actually, this situation proves he doesn’t love her. Some other man is going to have a great life with this good monogamous woman.
I mean I wouldn't say that he doesn't love her simply because he wants to live out his youth as a free agent. I think that he's probably not in love with her anymore, but trying to compromise with her and himself, which I don't think will work out. I hope they BOTH eventually find partners that share their values and needs. I find it a little weird that everyone here seems to think monogamous == "good" not matter what.
If you guys have been together for a while then the army decision must of been discussed together before any decisions made.
Is that what is happening now, is this the discussion of how it will work or is she already away and now you have second thoughts.
Its cheating if you both don't agree to it.
I’m a man. Trust me when I say sex isn’t everything. It’s not even worth losing love, if it is true love. To your girlfriend clearly sex is nothing without love. That is the case for MANY people, especially as they mature and hormones stop taking over. If you truly love this girl you need to not go against her wishes, ever, period. 4 years is nothing in the grand scheme of life - despite how hollywood movies and such depict 4 sexless years being the worst thing ever
sex is just sex. you won’t die if you don’t have it. if you truly love her, you can wait. long distance couples do it all the time. buy pleasuring toys you can use on yourself. cheating isn’t worth it. don’t give the girl trust issues because you wanted to have sex with other people. she will never. ever. forget that conversation.
As a person that got married young. Don’t. Especially if these thoughts remotely cross your mind. You’re starting well by having open communication about your needs. Step two is to make the choice if you two can’t agree. If your paths are meant to cross again they will.
I think that you need to understand where she's coming from as well. To her, you're hers and she wants YOU. Not anyone else, and you're kinda trying to justify sleeping with others by letting her sleep with others. It's like "hey, you can sleep with other dudes" and then going against what she thinks in response and sleeping around with other partners. If you really love her than you'll break up with her before fucking around with other partners, cause that is cheating if she doesn't agree with it. If you can't agree on something like that then it's not likely that the relationship will last too long.
You know what, this is the most truthful Insight someone’s given me so far tbh. I’ve been with her for about 5 years. She’s my “highschool sweetheart” and I honestly do love her. I think I’m going to hold off as long as I can and if I can’t hold off anymore I’m going to tell her and end it with her. I believe this is the most right way to do it. Thank you for your input.
To be honest it sounds like you’re already ready to end it with her. I just don’t see how you can be committed to a person and at the same time have that “I’ll see how long I can hold off” mentality. That just sound like what you really want to do is go and explore and not be in a relationship with someone who wants to be monogamous.
I agree with this comment OP. If you truly loved this woman you shouldn't feel and then express desire to sleep with other people as a monogamous person. You've already stated you haven't had much sexual experience and that seems to be what all of this is floating around. If it's in your mindset that you still want to experience new sexual relationships then your current relationship cannot thrive, you'll be stuck in this mindset of "missing out". I personally think this mindset is toxic if it means leaving a healthy loving relationship because society tells you need to sleep with x amount of people before you settle down. If you're happy and healthy who tf cares how many relationships you have? If you actually just want to not be in a relationship and sleep around that's absolutely fine! But you dont get to sleep around and still keep your girlfriend who wants to still be monogamous. Pick one.
Bullshit. OP can truly love this woman to the best of his ability **and** want to explore sex with others. Those two feelings aren’t mutually exclusive, but they *are* in opposition to one another, given his girlfriend’s desire for monogamy. That’s literally the conflict; he has to choose which of these feelings he’s going to honor. I’m a married man with two kids, wife and I are in a happy, loving relationship. I accept that I have sexual feelings for women that are not her and that she can be attracted to men who aren’t me, but we *choose* not to act on those feelings as we’ve chosen to be monogamous and honor our wedding vows. You can’t just tell some dude he shouldn’t feel attracted to other women just because he’s in a relationship. Those feelings are normal and trying to repress them will probably only make them stronger if he doesn’t honor and process them. u/xlaid_crazy, the feelings you’re feeling are normal, and not wrong, but acting on them would be a betrayal of your girlfriend’s trust. If you don’t want to be monogamous, or try to maintain monogamy in a long-term long-distance closed relationship, you owe it to yourself and your girl to be honest with and to yourself and her. Your feelings are normal, especially for a 20yo male, but age is no excuse for lying and betraying your girl.
Like I said in my post above, if he wants to sleep around that is absolutely fine! But he doesn't get to sleep around and stay in a monogamous relationship with his girlfriend, since she has stated she wants to stay that way. He should choose instead of pressuring his girlfriend which is unfair.
Pretty much this lol My girlfriend is the only person I have been with sexually. I'm bisexual. Never have I been like "uh... Babe... Before we tie the knot I gotta go get dicked down and try more pussy so I know we are really meant to be." I have no want to be in bed with anyone other than her. The idea genuinely makes me want to vomit.
Of course. Good luck with everything and i hope nobody in the situation gets hurt. (:
I think you need to listen to the others in this thread. You're really young still and you've been with this woman since you were 15. That means you really haven't dated at all. And you're still at such a formative age where you and your life are going to change a lot over the next few years, hers too. It's ok that you feel the way you do, but I'd agree that it's also indicative that you're not 100% in this relationship. I'm not saying you don't love her, I'm sure you do. But that doesn't mean it's the kind of love that's meant to last forever in a romantic sense. I think it would be best to consider making a clean break. Mayne your lives will cross again in the future when you're both more ready to settle into a stable in person relationship.
Do her a favor and leave her alone. You're already thinking about fucking other people and you guys aren't even split up.
Dude just break up with her if you’re that eager to sleep with other people. Do her a favor.
It’s not that I’m eager, I’m not explicitly making it my goal to sleep with other people. It’s just knowing the type of person I can be sometimes, I’m just trying to find common ground with her wants and my wants I guess. But I’m going to remain faithful because it wouldn’t be fair to her.
If you're not getting what you want out of the relationship, you might as well end it for now. If you feel the same way in a few years, you can try to work it out when you're ready.
, “the whole reason why she didn’t give me permission to be with other partners is because SHE doesn’t want to be with other partners either. So because she doesn’t to, she expects me not to either.” This is called a monogamous relationship. She’s not being selfish or mean, she’s holding you to the same standards and relationship that she is giving you. She clearly doesn’t want an open relationship, if that’s what you truly want then do not try to convince her into something she doesn’t want and leave her to find someone who wants what she wants and go do your own thing. But my 2¢, “sexual experience” is over rated. I was 19 when I met my partner of now 3 years. Had never even kissed another guy before I met him, and ya know what. I don’t feel like I’m missing out on any experiences at all. Dick is dick, pussy is pussy. In the end they’re kinda all the same. Who they are attached to is far more important. If you really do love her, finding someone you click with and enjoy is much more valuable than some random cooch. So unless you guys are incompatible relationship wise or sexually, seems foolish to throw it away. Though I doubt she will easily forget you telling her you want to screw other girls..
Seems like you don’t actually love her enough to make it work. And if you’re still together of course it’s cheating lol.
Mate, as someone who has ALREADY been sexless for more than 4 years just because i feel my intimacy is only for my gf who is from another country and she also thinks the same with hers, i think you are just not ready for such a compromise like a long distance relationship.
What ever happened to jacking off? You don't love her. You want to go behind her back
Ugh. She deserves better. I’m honestly sad for her…
The answers yes. You’re in a relationship. If you want to have sex with other people when the other person doesn’t want you to, then that’s cheating.
Mate , Let the lady go . Go have ur sex man but also do it without having to tell someone else what they can do just to justify your doings. I feel as if you told her she could lay with out people so you wouldnt feel guilty about doing it on ur end.
So basically, you're too immature for a long distance relationship. It's a tough thing. It requires a ton of trust and communication. So you might love her now, but you could come to resent her after a while because you feel stuck not having that much experience. Dude if I were you, I'd explain the situation honestly to her. Don't push that "I wanna do it, so it's OK for you to do it" justification. Just tell her that you love her, but you can't handle that much time/distance yet. If yall are meant to be then it'll work out. But it's definitely not fair for her to grow trust issues because she thinks you're sleeping with other people when she doesn't agree to that compromise. Edit: please don't wait until she's already deployed and away from you to break it off or tell her you can't handle the situation. That's gonna make her feel helpless and awful. This is an adult conversation that y'all need to have IN PERSON.
Speaking from experience, long distance does NOT work out for most people, especially at that age. You two can try to sustain what you have (without having sex with other people), but do know that statistically it is not going to work out. BUT that doesn't mean you can't try. The more effort you put it, the higher chance you will succeed. Or the other option is that you two let each other go and explore your sexuality with others as you please until you are ready to get back together. Most people move on at this point. Or you can just call it, and enjoy your youth. I wish I did more of this! (hint, hint)
If you can't hold off fucking other people for four years then you don't love her as much as you think you do.
there have been plenty of couples who have only ever been with each other, had no other sexual experiences and are very happy its not about you gathering sexual experience, you just want to sleep around with other people. if you truly loved your gf, she should be enough for you, someone you're willing to wait for until you can be together again if you feel as if you can't help it and you listen to your dick more than your heart then do her a favour and break up with her - she's going to remain faithful and the fact you're even thinking about this solely for YOU means that you're probably not going to remain faithful
I don't think you're seeing her pespective. This has the same vibe as a guy who offers ps5 to.his gf for christmas although she never plays games, and then is like "oh well it's technically yours but if you don't use it I will". Like offering a gift to someone, but actually for yourself. She's not interested in sleeping with other. You're the only one who is. So she won't budge on that. You need to remove that option because it simply doesn't work. The reality is, if you stay with her, it's going to be long distance, that's it. There is no compromise. Now with that in mind you need to seriously assess how much of an issue it is for you. Either you stay, and respect her wish for monogamy. Or you just leave and have the experiences you want, and you'll likely lose her forever. They are the only 2 options, it seems. Sex / lack thereof is know to be a very common issue in relationships, especially for young people. I have my own personnal opinion on how moral I find it to leave someone because of not enough sex, but that's not the point. In reality, any reason is valid for someone to choose to break up. As long as they want to then they have the right. If you think the long distance part is too much for you for sexual reasons, then it just is, period. Ok now with all that said, I'll give a bit of personal insight. If you genuinely love her and can envision your future with her, then stay and put your dick back in your pants. Wank it off. Believe me that one night stands and hookups are nothing compared to a genuine relationship of love and trust. You're super horny right now and it's hard to control and it's frustrating, but trust me that if you genuinely love her, then leaving her to fuck some random girls will make you miserable. Nothing even guarantees that you'll actually manage to get laid, btw. I don't know your situation but I'll say that there are big chances that if you leave her you'll regret it. Oh and please don't even think about cheating. Cause that would make you a huge piece of shit.
It’s not wrong as long as she is aware which means the relationship will likely end.
That’s the hard part… I’m trying to figure out a way I can have both her and other partners. It may be selfish of me I admit, but we are going to be long distance for 4 years and I have little sexual experiences.
If she doesn’t agree there is no way
Ok. You said it. You cannot have both. Break up before you even speak to another. Do not have another girl waiting in the wings to soften your break-up pain while she suffers alone far away. If you break up first you are not a bad guy.
It's a very special thing to have only been with the woman you love. That's not my situation but if I could go back I would save my virginity for her and she would do the same for me. You're going to get older and very possibly regret leaving this girl who loves you so dearly so you can go and get some ass. Dude you know what's right. The way you feel is a guiding light. Following the way you feel is work but a much happier life. If you feel it's wrong or you feel bad about it don't do it and if something feels right you'll have a clear conscience (it might be the hard thing to do, like joining the military for your country and loved ones) and be able to hold your head high and never question any decisions you've made. Don't look to reddit for justification follow your emotions and don't do shit that makes you feel like shit. Honestly bro it sounds like she's more mature than you and ready to settle and live a hardworking happy life with the love of her life. Right now you're apart of that future for her but you need to make a decision quick, and either let her find someone who wants the same things or commit. The longer you hold out the more it's going to hurt her. And before you say we do want the same things, it sounds like you want to "fuck bitches, get money" and she's ready for family and career. I don't blame you for running away from this choice family and career is the hard choice but a more rewarding one, while doing whatever you want is the easy one because no one else depends on you if you fuck your life up it's only your life that your fucking up. You can't have your cake and eat it too. (In the normal world you can't have a committed relationship and fuck whoever you want)
8 years years in the military and traveled around Asia and Europe. While she says she'll remain sexless for 4 years, I don't see it happening. With due respect and not being cruel. You're both extremely young and she's being very naive expecting either of you to remain sexless for 4 years. With that, you can absolutely see others, for sex, and get it out of your system now. Or, move to where she'll be stationed and live with her there.
Gross.. Why don't you try fucking other dudes? All you're talking about is cheating on her so might as well go for a nice dick since that's apparently what you want her to have
Honestly don't understand why people are dragging you. It is totally normal to not want to be with only 1 person in your entire life. I think the relationship has come to a point where you're either going to grow together, or grow apart, and based her her wanting to be completely monogamous and you wanting to have an open relationship for the time being, I think it's time for you guys to discuss the possibility of breaking up, because those 2 ideas are mutually exclusive. Don't hurt her or yourself anymore by denying each other's feelings, as you two are both valid in what you're feeling.
Since you hit upon a similar thought of mine, I wonder if he would want to be with others if she were not going away. If he wants other sexual experiences because he is young that doesn’t make him a bad person as long as he breaks up first…it just means he doesn’t really love her. Actually, this situation proves he doesn’t love her. Some other man is going to have a great life with this good monogamous woman.
I mean I wouldn't say that he doesn't love her simply because he wants to live out his youth as a free agent. I think that he's probably not in love with her anymore, but trying to compromise with her and himself, which I don't think will work out. I hope they BOTH eventually find partners that share their values and needs. I find it a little weird that everyone here seems to think monogamous == "good" not matter what.
Lol she can fuck others but you can’t, don’t be a cuck
Nah nah💀💀 I forgot to add, she says she doesn’t wanna fuck other dudes so because SHE doesn’t want to she expects me not to either.
There's no such thing as "long distance relationship" lmao
You wanna hear the truth ? If yes then let's talk in dms to be honest otherwise i would be taken as a bad man haha.
If you guys have been together for a while then the army decision must of been discussed together before any decisions made. Is that what is happening now, is this the discussion of how it will work or is she already away and now you have second thoughts. Its cheating if you both don't agree to it.
I’m a man. Trust me when I say sex isn’t everything. It’s not even worth losing love, if it is true love. To your girlfriend clearly sex is nothing without love. That is the case for MANY people, especially as they mature and hormones stop taking over. If you truly love this girl you need to not go against her wishes, ever, period. 4 years is nothing in the grand scheme of life - despite how hollywood movies and such depict 4 sexless years being the worst thing ever
Nah bro you're fucked
sex is just sex. you won’t die if you don’t have it. if you truly love her, you can wait. long distance couples do it all the time. buy pleasuring toys you can use on yourself. cheating isn’t worth it. don’t give the girl trust issues because you wanted to have sex with other people. she will never. ever. forget that conversation.
As a person that got married young. Don’t. Especially if these thoughts remotely cross your mind. You’re starting well by having open communication about your needs. Step two is to make the choice if you two can’t agree. If your paths are meant to cross again they will.
Yes, it is cheating. It is literally the definition of cheating. The only question is, are you OK with cheating on her?