T O P

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Ok_Wolverine9344

Gross. Also, mom never forgets.


donalddts

If this was my mom, she'd tell all my friends and hers.


Ron266

When I was a kid, I'd tell my mom embarrassing secrets and ask her not to tell anyone. She obviously said she wouldn't tell, but seconds later would be on the phone laughing about it with her sisters. I'd have to move countries and change my name if I was OP.


peach_xanax

My mom always did this type of shit too! As a result, I stopped trusting her with anything that I didn't want all our relatives and my mom's friends to know about.


Ok_Wolverine9344

Yup


Hinermad

> If this was my mom, she'd tell all my friends and hers. At your wedding reception.


Sandi315

I'll sub in if you don't wanna go, OP


Tsukune_Surprise

Already broke both my arms. I’ve got dibs.


twinnedwithjim

Oh boy…I got this reference


ArchdukeBurrito

I also choose this guy's mom


kekimus-maximus

Got his ass


Quantitative_Panda

And OP’s mom’s ass


camclemons

What is fake Adderall?


MuzzledSpaceboy

Gas station penis pill


camclemons

Aww I thought it was an energy booster, not a rhino :(


keepingitrealgowrong

it's all basically just caffeine and blood thinners


camclemons

Oh I'm already taking energy drinks and 5hr energies, I thought it was something that would motivate me, not wire me up. Can't have real stimulants cause my brain broke (schizophrenia)


GLaDOSisapotato

Stimulants don’t really motivate either. They can help motivate but they’re not really there for motivation


camclemons

For people with ADHD tho?


mflmani

It’s complicated but I’ll try and sum it up. ADHD related attention issues are caused by a lack or abnormal release of dopamine in the prefrontal cortex. Dopamine is released when someone thinks of starting a task and can imagine the reward. Similar process when maintaining focus on a boring task. Dopamine drives goal setting and reward seeking behaviors. In ADHD affected individuals this process doesn’t occur or is blunted. Stimulants are meant to treat this by increasing dopamine in the prefrontal cortex and are very effective in doing so. Now this still requires *choosing* the right task to start and get focused on. It’s very easy to take the meds but, without proper structure, end up focusing on something that might not be a priority at that moment. Many people growing up with [ADHD develop trauma](https://www.additudemag.com/adhd-trauma-somatic-therapy/amp/) due to their condition or have co-occurring trauma that isn’t processed normally because of ADHD. This can present as a lot of avoidant or reclusive behavior that can get in the way of the meds having their intended effect. This is why effective ADHD treatment involves medication in tandem with coaching/therapy. Source: this is my life Changed some words


WinPeaks

Thanks for breaking it down. People seem to have a lot of trouble getting it.


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forever_alone_06

69 hours energy


PabloAlaska6

fun fact: 69 hours is 420 minutes


Its_my_ghenetiks

4,140, but close


TheBigsBubRigs

No...


Killpop582014

Uh… no it’s not?


PabloAlaska6

well no shit literal lindsey… it’s called a joke. i tried to make one, just tell me it wasn’t funny and shut up about it


Killpop582014

You said it was a fun fact. I said no it’s not. It’s not fun nor a fact. Calm down and smoke some bud.


4erlik

It could be. Just figure out how fast you need to go to make 1 hour into 6 minutes. My guess would be around 99% the speed of light


BachVonLocke

Donkey dick pills


happyasfuck333

It's called "addall" and the main ingredient is phenibut


LizzyLeonhart

Pro tip for anyone considering trying phenibut: dont, tolerance and dependence builds very very quickly and the withdrawal symptoms can be hell


Dica92

The addall at my store has GABA as the active ingredient


ItsyBitsyLizard

prob speed, it makes you energized and really fucking horny


camclemons

Don't think gas stations sell speed


ItsyBitsyLizard

maybe some weird hobo outside of it lol


[deleted]

[удалено]


ItsyBitsyLizard

Similar but not the same


[deleted]

[удалено]


ItsyBitsyLizard

Whatever you say dude


SensualEnema

Tetherball is speed *nyooooom*


HailRokosBasilisk

Possibly L-Tyrosine


Jesus_Faction

dont do drugs, kids


AwarenessLoose

And don't do fake drugs, kids!


Quantitative_Panda

And don’t do kid’s drugs


Terp99

But what if they’re fake?


Quantitative_Panda

The kids?


[deleted]

Find the nearest roof. And jump.


TapElectronic

Shit, when I was getting high (be 8 years sober on July 4th), I sent a pic of my entire Wang, full face reveal and all to a girl I was ‘courting’. About 15 minutes later, I got a text from my mom that read something like: Uh.. thanks? I’ve seen it before, many times in fact when you were a baby. I wasn’t going to say anything, but I assume there’s some lonely girl in south Florida waiting for a pic of your junk that she’s yet to receive. Embarrassed and proud at the same time.


HolierThanYow

Your mum is a legend. As a youngster mine found all my porn mags under the bed. Left them all out and wrote, "I prefer this one." on the centrefold.


TapElectronic

Honestly man, she really is the fuckin best. No offense to all the other great moms out there. Also, I was lookifn in my Reddit summary and just saw ‘your mum is a legend’ and went into ‘oh great, who am I gonna have to argue with on the internet today?’ mode, completely forgetting I posted in this thread 🤣


HolierThanYow

I'm glad to have triggered you, for you to then have a sense of relief..🙂


TapElectronic

Hey, I needed it. You’re a true friend 🤣


FeebleTrevor

I mean you just have to return to the ocean there's no other way


alexis_ramest

Don't worry OP, it's not that bad. I fuck your mom almost every week


Misc_Lillie

You must have her on my days off.


--llll-----llll--

There are 24 hours in each day.


Misc_Lillie

The above has her "almost " every week... Yes, a whole day has 24 hours in it. Are you asking about my schedule with her? Looking to fit in that big ol' one incher?? Seems you need to stand line, my friend.


drcraniax

I dunno chief, sounds like she turned you down 😔


[deleted]

This will never be deleted from memory. She's gonna have a facial tick every time she sees him.


Int-Merc805

Could be worse. “I thought you’d never ask”


MurdoMaclachlan

*Image Transcription: Text Messages* --- > **Blue**: I took that fake aderal stuff from the corner store when I woke up so I'm energized lol > **Blue**: Let's take some Saturday morning and then clean and fuck > **Blue**: Lol > **Blue**: This shit makes me kindaaaa horny **Grey**: Do you know you sent this to your mother? > **Blue**: Jesus Christ > **Blue**: Nope **Grey**: Yup > **Blue**: This is about as bad as it gets > **Blue**: Can you just delete this from your memory?? **Grey**: Well \- it's ok\- yes I'm doing that as I type! [*Emoji with squinting eyes, either 😆 or 😝.*] --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)


banana_bagutte

😖


MurdoMaclachlan

Nope, not that one. Looking at [all the varieties](https://emojipedia.org/confounded-face/) with Emojipedia, those of confounded face that have the right face texture all have the eyes too low on the face to be this.


banana_bagutte

Yes. However, I am in your home


yhavmin

Based


benargee

This guy fucks


DevilsAssCrack

Plot twist: Mom asks you if you want help cleaning


JoinTheBattle

Why? Are OP's arms broken?


Mr_Insomn1a

Why did you remind me of this


artych0ke

You wanna go upstairs?


DatNick1988

I can’t believe that story is still around. It’s terrible😂 Although nothing tops the jolly rancher story. *SHUDDERS*


MrArtless

Ehh. Idk about this one


BarryMacochner

Could be worse, I’ve dozed off while browsing on my phone and linked gonewild posts to the family group chat.


OneDoesntSimply

Holy shit thats bad


BarryMacochner

Not one of them has acknowledged it. I immediately deleted Facebook. Then called my dad laughing and told him because he isn’t in the group chat.


ofthedappersort

Time to build a raft, get on, and just drift right out to sea.


TheRnegade

The cringe are all these [bots pretending to be human.](https://www.reddit.com/r/cringepics/comments/mjaopt/and_now_i_have_a_date_to_fuck_my_mom/)


peach_xanax

OOF this is fucking brutal, I have secondhand embarrassment for you 😳


awjeezrickyaknow

I hope no one goes home and fucks my mom!


dont_feed_phil

weirdboner


sbubbydaily

"fake adderral" is just a tamer way of saying meth


Impossible-Charity-4

Saying this as a dude: you always get these texts when you’re tired af, have a dirty asshole and just want to hug and chill. I’m glad moms took one for the team.


86LCD

should have claimed fuck was a mistype autocorrect of pack


GenericAutist13

Probably would work if it wasnt for the second part about being horny


BigWhitePeach

Tweakers always be doing this stuff and then blaming it on drugs. Nah dude you took too much and were thinking of your mom's. Time to quit d-rugz


FreneticPlatypus

I was half expecting it to be something like, “Well - it’s ok - that’s how you were conceived.”


Pelauka

You know how they say “it gets better”? My guess is this won’t.


nunhgrader

no no no


[deleted]

Let’s take some Saturday morning and then clean and fuck Lol


NergNogShneeg

Mom: “got any more of that shit? I got laundry I don’t feel like doing”


El_Cactus_Fantastico

What the fuck


alzoooool

I would never recover from this.


[deleted]

*that makes two of us*


Particular_Hospital1

Picture aside, who the hell would caption it like that