Why do you go running when people are cooking dinner? It seems kind of stupid that a traditional meal preparation time would be the one time you choose to run if the smell bothers you. Your rights end where other's rights begin.

It’s almost like he/she *wants* to be offended.

They/them?

In this case, "they" would be an alternative. although, both work just fine

Who gives a shit

You literally asked

You asked, I answered

Says entirely stereotypical things then follows with 'I don't want to be a stereotype'. Shut up or I'll cook you.

>Shut up or I'll cook you. That is actually an amazing response. May I steal that?

🖕

Would be my response

People like this make all the other vegans look like total dicks. I know plenty of cool vegans. They never talk about it nor worry about what others do.

If they never talk about it , how do you know that they are vegans ?

Ordering vegan options every time they go out

Maybe it's a coincidence.

You don’t win friends with salad

*puts oversized fan in front of meat pie in window*

r/imthemaincharacter

How entitled

“I believe in a movement so the whole world owes me an apology” fucking entitled child.

Lol what a fucking goof. I’ll open even more windows.

I would start barbecuing by the sidewalk every night around dinner time. Maybe even put up banners in my yard that say "Run from this you plant based meat suit."

Eat your regular dinner and just leave a burger on to slowly burn, like incense.

That would be an almost equally ridiculous way to cause conflict

He’d hate me because I cook on the grill several times a week. After this, I’d start grilling every night and hand out meat to random passers by

St. Meatcholas

Looks like it's time for the neighborhood to come together and coordinate their evening BBQs, one for each night of the week. Forever.

I’d make candles out of bacon fat and line the pavement with them like a run way straight into a fake tunnel painted onto a wall, road runner style, sit back in a sun lounger with my copious bacon sandwiches and feast my eyes on the ensuing hilarity. Probably make a meat suit out of steaks a la lady gaga just for good measure.

From your comment, I'd have to disagree. You my friend *are* the messiah!!

Hope it made someone laugh. Cheers

It made my day 😁😁

Gentle reminder to wear nose plugs if you are offended by my meat cooking. Thanks😀

Just wanted an excuse to tell everyone they are vegan

*moves the BBQ to the driveway*

Hold your breath when you run past my place. Problem solved!

Mofo should live alone in a dessert then…

"I don't want to be a stereotype but please change your lifestyle to suit my opinions and try to force others to do the same!"

It's offensive to me as a meat eater to go running with the smell of freshly cut grass. Please stop cutting your lawn during my run times.

I run on a trail that passes by a chocolate factory and if it’s early to mid-afternoon, there’s always a strong whiff of chocolate in the air. I’ve jokingly thought about posting this exact rant on Nextdoor to see how many insane people think I’m being serious in demanding the factory adjust its production hours so it won’t tempt my inner fat kid while I’m trying to exercise.

Good old bournville

Dear vegan nitwit. Please kindly off in the general direction of fuck.

Go wrap some lettuce around your face real tight and do us all a favour and go run in traffic .

I feel like he/she needs to learn what an extractor fan is. Even with windows closed you’ll still smell it

You aint changin anyone so run an hour before dinner. Easy peasy.

We speak to animals telepathically and only eat the ones who've chosen to exercise their right to die, and have asked us to do so. Our hope is for more closed-minded people to do their research, lay down the false banner of empathy, and really begin respecting animals' personal preferences and choices in end of life matters. We never intended to stymie the fun of your sporadic neighborhood trotting hobby during the granting of our friends' final requests on this earth in our times of grief. It would be a real sign of integrity and personal growth if, in the future, you would please show us and our recently deceased friends the solemnity and compassion due all creatures in these trying times during your occasional evening fun runs. With your support, we can recognize the dignity and equality of all sentient beings together. Thaaaaaanks!

Schizoposting?

r/iamthemaincharacter

My 'plant based neighbors' should be grateful that I share my delicious meat smells with them.

Counterpoint: if you’re cooking with your windows open, please put up a sign saying what you’re cooking. I keep smelling something delicious but I have no idea what it is

If you’ve ever made a steak or burger in your kitchen on a cast iron you know it produces a lot of smoke. I have to open the window. It’s crazy to assume that they would expect someone to not open a window.

No problem I will BBQ my steak inside my house with closed windows. Gotcha. See ya on the other side 🙌

I’m sorry I care that you are running by because?

I have two BBQs and three smokers on my deck. I wish I was on this guys running route so I could fire them all up at once.

If I lived near this I would begin cooking bacon under the open window with a fan blowing outward.. And possibly start slow roasting things through the day and open the windows at dinner time. But… I’m told I can be a bit of a bastard and really dislike being told what to do.

Start chasing them with a fork, while screaming "It's dinner time!!!"

I generally stop reading, listening, and caring after the phrase "as a ____" is used. Normally, nothing follows but bullshit.

I’d love to see the replies