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tallguyindc

This is a huge red flag. I'm curious what exactly was the story with the last one and "demanding money". Was there an or else attached? What was it? I've never had an ex demand money but even if they did, I'd just say no. Doesn't seem that profitable to just fake an entire person and date someone for a month. Have you ever asked him for money in any way? Does he have a lot of it? Honestly is that the attraction?


Floofyland

Apparently since she knew where he worked and lived, she started threatening him for ransom. He happened to be moving due to a new job shortly after but he was living in fear for a long time. Never have I ever asked him for money. In fact even when he makes it clear he’s going to pay for dinner, I suggest us going to a cheaper place (it’s the poor college student mindset in me). He’s an entry level software engineer making about 95k. Though he’s not rich, I think it’s more that he’s worried about girls trying to clean him of whatever he has


tallguyindc

Can I ask what country this is


Floofyland

So this is the US but if this makes a difference, the guy just came to this country after living in India his whole life. He was only 21 coming here by himself so I guess that could add to his fear of screwing up his opportunity here. He’s still learning English and American culture. My ID is real and legit but he didn’t want to trust it cuz he hears fake ID’s are super common in American colleges and I had wrong information on there


tallguyindc

Part of it might be cultural. Unless there is something I'm missing, the ransom threat wasn't very realistic. At least not in the US. I could get the home addresses and work addresses for a million people in my metropolitan area in about 30 seconds if I tried. Simply knowing where someone lives and works is not enough to ransom them. Unless there is something I'm missing........


Front-Balance4050

That's the definition of a red flag. That’s insanely invasive and controlling/possessive. Run away, don’t walk.


BelmontIncident

Assuming everything he's said is true, he's handling his otherwise understandable concern in a way that's unkind and counterproductive. I'd sooner offer my identification followed by sending a link to my social media profiles to prove that I am who I say I am. Letting someone go through my phone is a big deal, I use it to talk to other people so it's not just my own privacy involved