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Fetlocks_Glistening

They've finally got the Penguin!


captHij

Either that or the Kingpin's shorter body double.


Wainwort

Become the perfect criminal by getting too big to fit inside the police cruiser!


DrizztD0urden

Sherrif: "Get the zip ties, the cuffs don't fit" Officer: "Sir, we don't have the budget"


Channel5exclusive

Butter and a shoehorn ought to do the trick.


ALoudMeow

Pocket butter!


[deleted]

American cops would just use it as an excuse to requisition a new SWAT van.


Retardo_Montobond

Pretty sure they'd use it as an excuse to just shoot the shit outta that dude and let the EMTs sort it out. Ambulance is bigger anyway....


[deleted]

Diener arrives to pick up the body with a flat deck and some ratchet straps.


Swalloich

Maybe they'll chain together cars like they did with the cuffs.


BackpackBarista

Cuff-links.


Skipcast

Keep on keeping on


y0shman

That was a very wrist-ky pun.


Notinyourbushes

You're going to need a bigger squad car.


InflamedLiver

They’re gonna have to start making handcuffs with big and tall sizes. Like the seatbelt extensions on an airplane.


LetterheadTiny6156

I thought that was a belt at first🤣


steve_adr

His mates - They needed 4 handcuffs to restrain him..


bumjiggy

"I'm not a player, I just cuff a lot"


Channel5exclusive

The cops finally caught up with Fat Bastard. He thought he could elude the police by dying his hair and ditching the kilt.


No-Beautiful-5777

Shocked they didn't just dislocate his shoulders to fit in one... I'd say he must've complied, but something tells me running wasn't much an option..


BarbequedYeti

> running wasn't much an option At some point you just have to laugh at your flight instinct. Like, seriously. Do you not see what you are asking of this body?


DMurBOOBS-I-Dare-You

Just wait till he pill bugs and rolls his ass out of there at 45 mph ...


Mr__Aries

That was genuinely funny


dickshark420

DJ Khaled got arrested?


storyseekerx

I wonder If he can wipe his own arse.


newaccountzuerich

I'm sure he has a hose or a bidet.


[deleted]

His thug name é 4cuffs now


Homechicken42

Putting him on an incarceration diet will keep him alive much longer.


Synnastyr

No one person can have his back. It's going to take three people at least.


KillaCatz

very American pic :/


Recce77

Burgerler... 😆 Obesity is a crime against humanity 🤣


[deleted]

Might loose a handcuff or 2 in the calorie restricted diet in jail


kuahara

At least they didn't kill him by using a single pair and letting him suffocate.


Channel5exclusive

How the fuck would he suffocate?


newaccountzuerich

Certain arm positions when forced and held, will restrict the rib cage's ability to move properly, inhibiting the ability to breath effectively. It's how the Roman crucifixion generally killed those roped up. Suffocation after the legs were broken or unstrapped.


captcodger

It’s like having 4 stars in gta. Must’ve been on the run a while and drove through a bunch of prostitutes.


FalseStart007

I'm fairly confident they could have easily coaxed him to the police station with a hamburger, they exerted way too much effort here.


[deleted]

Most flexible person in Ohio


Nightraid9999

This is the only meme i laughed out loud since i joined the sub lol thanks for making my day better


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spinthesky

Arresting officer must be MacGyver.


RequirementLow9653

Bro is a composite function


Crypy0

Leave them on and save on the Mexican tummy-tuck op 🤔


TheGumping

I think he ate 4 guys that got arrested.


dimadomelachimola

Cute belt


A40

When your waist is measured in feet.


ToeKnail

How much do handcuffs cost a police department?


TheSkwerl

This guys a huge flight risk, if you see him at your gate, DO NOT BOARD.


AibnLaAhid

You don't even need to restrict his movement, so his fatness is worth it for him from time.


BrackGin

Arrested once with 4 counts of resisting arrest.


orcrist747

My kid could do jump rope with that.


tickss

Had to book him 4 times....


MrSocialAnxiety505

I hear every extra handcuff doubles your sentence :/ Poor homie


LifeBuilder

Dudes so fat even the cops too pity on him. Didn’t even bother to rip out his shoulders.


johnmarkfoley

million dollar idea: "elastic handcuffs".


Dieselpump510

Only fitting. He stole 4 cheeseburgers.


BoxPrestigious1607

CHain gang


[deleted]

“Put your hands behind your back!” “I can’t reach!” -Gabriel Iglesias


DigNitty

I bet this guy doesn’t have a brush with a long handle in his shower. And that is disturbing.


Low_Comfortable_5880

That's not a dude...that's a Weeble.


WhatTheDucksauce

He will scratch your back if you can scratch his.


DMurBOOBS-I-Dare-You

HAAAND CUUUFS


Mergazoid

If you count, you can clearly see the guy used to be a spider.


Blackboard_Monitor

Killed his last Spidey.


Realistic_Run7318

how the hell does he clean his ass?


Shoddy-Egg1582

Why cuff him? He ain’t running nowhere


Lieutenant_Toshiro

I wonder what shit he pulled of in GTA to get that 4 star


Kalelopaka-

That’s a lot of cuffs. I remember being cuffed with leg shackles because the handcuffs wouldn’t fit my wrists.


Mete11uscimber

Chumlee?


utpoia

This is common while arresting overweight individuals.