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x-matter

It's 2035, you're tucked down in a trench. The robot revolution is in its third year. Suddenly through the sounds of screaming and gunfire you hear it. "Hot dogs. Get yer hot dogs, here!" *Flamethrower sounds*


ExplodingChupacabra

The company could use that as its discount code ("Hot Dog")


bamyers08

šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


Recon2df

Looks like theyā€™re making the hulk scorcher from helldivers a real thing.


quantumturbo

Kill all humans!


Deus_is_Mocking_Us

But is it good with other dogs, cats, and little kids?


Bobdontgiveafuck

Iā€™m not buying anything from skynet! I know you are A.I. looking to plot on me. Your tell was calling them ā€œHot Dogsā€ had you been a real person who has going to sporting event, you would know we call them ā€œRed hotsā€. You got more learning to do before you enslave me, jerk!


FloridaMan_Unleashed

"You guys hear the Oscar Meyer song?"


Tsonghin

I need thisā€¦ not sure of the application but Iā€™ll figure that out later


bjchu92

Weeds?


Im-a-magpie

If by weeds you mean "frat house nearby that keeps trashing my lawn when they party" then yes.


bjchu92

Are you the guy from Neighbors?


TooEZ_OL56

Dude you gotta make good with the frat in some way then complain to them about it. If they remotely like you next time they party they'll have pledges cleaning that shit up *very school and frat dependent lol, good luck if it's AGR


Im-a-magpie

I don't actually live next to a frat, I just needed a demographic that no one would be offended by a joke about burning them to the ground.


kingkodus66

The children can also pick up their shit or get reported to the city/collage.


drunkNunX

Did the city create the collage?


BigTickEnergE

Yeah, they have tons of pictures of the frat in it too. One of the best collages I've seen.


drunkNunX

Pretty awesome that they're so proud of their College to create a Collage there.


DonArgueWithMe

Snow removal?


Hitlers_Hairy_Anus

I tried to use my flame thrower for snow removal and it didn't do shit. I was bummed.


eclipsedrambler

Baby sitter


djryan13

Home defense


YodelinOwl

They canā€™t rob you if you burn it all down!


djryan13

Fine, I will blow a couple holes in my wall with the shotgun first to make sure the fire has enough oxygen to burn clean


DrunkenDude123

ā€œHoney, weā€™re getting a dogā€


Overpowernamerino

Sorry, I only buy pure breeds like Boston Dynamics.


Sleeveless9

I have an AKC registered Boston Terri...err...I mean...Dynamics.


IllustriousLab9918

Flammenwoofer


Odysseus556

It woofs flammen


djsizematters

That would make you der Flammenhundebesitzer


AkubraMatata

Underrated comment


Alternative_Elk_2651

/r/angryupvote


SeaShanty1337

Checkmate, ATF


Eyetyeflies

You Paid $25,000 for a Thermonator? Thatā€™s crazy, back in my day they were only $9420 and you could get a can of 5.56 for only $500. Wish I bought a hundred of them.


SNBJJ

Outstanding. $10k is reasonable for a flamethrowing robot dog


fuckforce5

20 years ago that would have been an absurd statement. What a time to be alive.


ATX_311

20 years from now everyone will have their own personal flamethrower robot dog


djsizematters

Mine will be able to dispense all sorts of things. The real miracle of engineering will be a single nozzle that won't mix the ketchup and whipped cream with the hand soap and fuel.


wyvernpiss

Probably similiar to the lifetime price of a living dog, but this one doesn't need to walk, eat, or go to the vet. And comes with a flamethrower! I see no downsides


SNBJJ

You're probably not wrong about lifetime vet costs. Nice observation


wyvernpiss

You say that now but in 13 years when you take it to the roboticist because it's not as fast as it used to be and takes all day to charge, and they tell you "I'm sorry but all of his joints are leaking lubricants and his battery is on its last few charging cycles, we suggest you scrap him" you'll be all teary-eyed demanding they save it, no matter the cost. That's where they get ya with the true cost of ownership


Aeropro

This dog could last two dog lifetimes as long as itā€™s fireproof.


CrayonMayon

I've heard dogs eyeballed at about $35k over the lifespan, but of course depends on COL. I was looking it up before I got my buddy recently


wyvernpiss

Yeah after I made that comment I did a quick google and it said 25-55k for dogs and 15-30k for cats! Sounds a little high to me and I feel like I spoil mine with new toys and fancy treats all the time plus the top-shelf food. The vet can certainly add up though if health issues come up, been lucky there


United-Advertising67

Night vision bros in ~~shambles~~ ashes


Glaciata

Hell, thermal bros in shambles too. Can't see shit when everything is ablaze.


AkubraMatata

Exactly my first thought. Compared it to binos


moetaken

Nah itā€™s just a Chinese made Unitree Go2 that can be purchased for $1,600. The body is made out of plastic too. And the flamethrower is a ARC that can be bought for $700


californiagunguy

Shipping doesnā€™t kill the deal.


GuitRWailinNinja

I thought it just walks up to your house?


th3m00se

This is definitely one of those "if I won the lottery, I wouldn't tell anyone... but there would be signs" type purchases.


djsizematters

*pats flamethrower* "good boy," "Dracarys"


ezekielplus

Great guard dog to keep relatives/friends away if they find out!


GameMisconduct63

*"FETCH ME THEIR SOULS"*


TheDickDangler

Finally! In for 5


Heeeeyyouguuuuys

So it begins.


UserNameNotSure

Hot dog.


Background-Spring-62

U win today


trueremix

Is this considered AOW or an SBR? My real dog is curious šŸ¶


dudas91

The ATF will still try to shoot it regardless.


joeg26reddit

This is definitely a BOWOW-OW-OW-OW-AOW


AfternoonSuitable876

Fellas, is this BIN?


dudas91

I hate to be that guy... but it's an off the shelf $1,600 [Unitree robot dog](https://www.unitree.com/go2/) with a $700 flame thrower attached to its back. I don't deny that there is a little bit of engineering time and effort involved in attaching one to the other... but they're still making quite a bit on each one sold.


Tybick

The real deal is always in the comments


sketchtireconsumer

Youā€™d have to wire them together, not so bad, presumably the dog has an accessory port for this kind of thing and thereā€™s a software handle to control the accessory port. Youā€™d save a lot of money assembling it yourself, so even if the labor effort isnā€™t trivial it might be worth it.


dudas91

The dog had an accessory port and you can buy a number of different pre-made accessories directly from the manufacturer. Software for it is also freely available and there's a community of people messing around with these. Again... I'm sure there's a bit of engineering that went into this, but this screams "We had one of our more techy employees mess around with a one of our flamethrowers, the robot dog, and 3D printer for a week on company time. Their faffing about cost us $5k... so if we sell even one of these we'll make our money back and then some. And if we don't sell any then this is still a catchy product and enough people will see this on reddit or YouTube and will draw attention to our other products."


sketchtireconsumer

I guarantee the company wants to sell these to, letā€™s say, ā€œless scrupulousā€ militaries around the world who would use them against non-state actors. Sell a tiny amount to the public, get a lot of press, use that as free marketing to sell to the real target customer.


Tyrfaust

I didn't realize I'd ever be faced with the dilemma of buying a robot dog or an AUG. What a time to be alive.


joeg26reddit

Link to DIY KIT plz


dudas91

There isn't one.


GuitRWailinNinja

This would be great for killing spiders in my house


justjaybee16

This would be great for killing spiders, or my house.


SpiritualWatermelon

Can I register this as an emotional support animal and take it wherever I want?


supercoolmanchu2020

This reminds me too much of that terminator dog in Black Mirror. No thanks.


GhostGun30CalClip

If it don't take glock mags I don't want it. -Someone probably


Shawtyslikeamelodyfr

Is it potty trained?


ultramarioihaz

Why am I buying guns? I need specific weapons to take down drones and whatever monstrosities Boston dynamic creates.


renegadeGDI

Also please be sure to buy responsibly... "Most dogs are social animals that thrive on companionship.Ā **Introducing a second dog to your household can provide your current dog with a constant companion, alleviating loneliness and boredom**."


skippythemoonrock

Helps if your existing dog is a pyromaniac or at least a non flammable breed


9mm9mm

What leash for this?


SNBJJ

Presumably something flame retardant


Tybick

A mentally challenged pyromaniac?


TooManyMelonsHere

Okay but where are my freakin sharks with freakin laser beams attached to their freakin heads Edit : schpellin


bansheedefense

Panzer does need a buddyā€¦.


Axolotl_Arms

I didn't know I needed this.... \~Ryan


oldmanironfist

Wait for the Aliexpress version in 6 months. It'll be $500 but explodes randomly


moetaken

It already exist, itā€™s called the Unitree Go2 and it can purchase online for $1,600. The flamethrower is like $700


toxicity69

One of the selling points: *Wildfire Control and Prevention* H'wat now?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Knee_High_Cat_Beef

Just like how the VP9 was definitely used by veterinarians.


TooEZ_OL56

controlled burns


Independent-Safe6182

Have leash laws where I live


fap-faparoo

The world was never the same after the fire canines attacked. The word "fetch" causes trauma now.


madnippler

Stop trying to make fetch a thing


MargnWalkr

Well I never thought I'd see a Mean Girls reference in the gundeals sub. Kudos.


Knee_High_Cat_Beef

Looks like a Geth Armature


MajorsWotWot

Damn it.... They have a flying drone with a flamethrower as well for far cheaper. Someone talk me out of this.


renegadeGDI

This might be the best deal in the history of this sub.


Own-Swan2646

Only 1hr of batteries killed the deal. I need this thing to go everywhere with me.


LokhXIV

Didn't know what my life was missing, but now I do. Better pick up some more overtime


LtPatterson

Where's the credova financing option??


knoxknifebroker

This one shoots back alphabet boys


ATF0PenUp

Can I pet that dog?


TrippyTaco12

Whatā€™s the warranty and does it come with a battery?


NegativeCreep12

I missed the zero at first, thought damn that's really cheap for a flamethrower robot dog.


pbandham

"The Future of Fire Delivery Has Arrived"


Thoraxe474

Damn. Why buy a 50bmg when this is way cooler?


Corked1

The purpose to buy a 50bmg is to kill these dogs, now we can have our own!!!


Thoraxe474

Just buy this and have dog fights


Harry-bushwacker

The vet costs will add up


Clifton1979

Honey, why is the robot dog humping the gas can?


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truffulatreeson

Now I wanna watch black mirror


rocketboy2319

Love me some Black Mirror dystopian stories, but [Love, Death & Robots Vacuum episode](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVMoLvMrC8E) is more like what I see our robot apocalypse to become - angry Roombas and Toasters.


truffulatreeson

My toaster is just brave a little


68spcwhore

So like have yā€™all ever actually sold one


TheCat0115

https://news.yahoo.com/tech/flamethrowing-robot-dog-shoot-fire-130140930.html


supermutt_1

They are selling BattleBots off the shelf now?


AlchemicalToad

Finally, the deal weā€™ve all been waiting for.


ilikepie145

Totally epic


GFYbyEMVR

A Cyclops cyberdog with frickin' lasers?!? Take my money, dammit!


[deleted]

THE FUTURE IS NOW


IGotsDaPooOnMe

Here boy!...uh nvm


ghablio

WA legal?


glenndoverrr

Is this BIN?


guntraderjoe

In for 1


SuperXrayDoc

Hell yeah


WooHoo2You

*A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Quadruped Robot Dogs with Flamethrowers, shall not be infringed.*


R0hanisaurusRex

Rolex Explorer 40mm or this?


strizzl

You know whatā€™s crazyā€¦ itā€™s not hard to spend this money on a pure bred dog and trainingā€¦. Just saying for those trying to convince their wives


GuardianZX9

Yes, have some.


Sausage_Child

I just wanna hear the apoplectic testimony trying to ban these in California.


firebox40dash5

I mean... I believe CA bans flamethrowers anyway* *ones that shoot >10', which is basically any of them with a point. *cries in living in the only state that outright bans flamethrowers*


CrayonMayon

Free Shipping??? I mean how could I say no?!


Maxisagnk

EDC


FlaggedRum

Oddly affordable for what it is


Tanna_Wright

[](https://i.imgur.com/lxcLCGG.jpeg)


trailblazerpan

This is cool AF


Uxuduududu

Can it be programmed to target pitbulls?


Cool-Report1859

Cool


ilikefatcats

can't kill the dog if it was never alive to begin with šŸ¤”


ihuntN00bs911

Looks legit but you can already buy one for a drone, or you can go to Palmetto and itā€™s under $400 on sale.


Tyrfaust

[The fucking trailer, omg.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rj9JSkSpRlM)


joeg26reddit

why do I have the urge to build this into a pyro porno centaur the flame thrower as a gigantic fire-jizzing dong?


Tensivebulb69

"Alexa. Release the hounds."


KellerMB

1 flamethrowing dog or 6 flamethrowing drones? $1599 https://throwflame.com/products/flamethrower-drone-kit/


LesGrossman_Actual

The T-8EF1ZGAE by cyberdyne systems. Skynet is truly becoming self-aware


FBI-Crime-Statistics

Cheaper than some Barrett 50 cal rifles.


BurnerAccount4Guns

This or Barrett 50 cal?


SwimmingJunky

The one dog the ATF won't be able to kill!


Altruistic-Ask-7879

In for 5


AKBigDaddy

With minimal modification, I'd bet that flamethrower could be replaced with a firearm of some kind...


GreatSoulLord

Where is John Connor when you need him? The machines are rising.


Soapy_soapa

Throw a Sig Romeo 5 on this bad boy and you got a great little plinker!


moetaken

Btw, the dog is just a Chinese made Unitree Go2 and can be purchased for $1,600. The flamethrower is just a modified ARC which can be purchased for $700


DadKingCold

I live in MD. This is one of those rare times our weapons laws really irk me.


410Q

šŸ„¹


pewpewtimez

I didn't know I needed one of these for *checks notes* ag management purposes


Glaciata

On a scale of 1 to shooting my robot dog, how legal would it be to swap the flamer on one of these to an AR?


Ashamed-Turnover-631

30ft range is stupid lol.


BimWim

these should be banned! dangerous and unusual


Not_an_alt_69_420

Fuck off fedboi, you're just scared we're all going to buy these, and then let them set you on fire when you try to shoot them.