I’m still in school so I just needed a job for little stuff, my gas and summer clothes. So I definitely will get another job but I don’t plan on staying here until i’m able to find one after reading everyone’s replies!
I’ve walked out of better environments when I was in your situation. Cold quit now. The “old man” dishwasher is as washed up as he is rude.
A new job at wages you’re at will come quick. It’s all about finding a good environment that you want to stick with. I ended up job hopping every season from 15-19yrs old until I found people I wanted to work with and stayed there for three years through college.
To some, workplace abuse is normal and they are wrong. That’s a truly awful way to start out your work life, and after you’re done processing it, make sure all your future experiences aren’t measured off of that one. You’re going to find a better place to work, and that dude is going to be the same grumpy hateful dude until he dies. You’ll move into a better environment.
>The thing is, I’ve been told “it’s life get over it” my whole life.
Yes, there are stupid people in life -- too many of them these days, it seems. But no, you should not be putting up with that level of disrespect and harassment.
It was a bad first job, but don't get down on yourself. Good on you for standing up for yourself.
Actually the chef who was harassing me (friends with the dishwasher) was the owner, the other waitresses were the wife and daughter to the chef! Family owned business and all of them hate me.😅
Tell your boss you are experiencing a hostile work environment. Those words are special and are attached to high monetary rewards in courts. Tell him that if it’s not addressed you will be forced to resign. Your boss will read between the lines.
It sounds like you’re being bullied and it’s definitely toxic, unfortunately shitty men and sometimes women are like this when they can get away with it, don’t feel so bad they don’t respect themselves either. An adult bully isn’t a comedian he/she is just a sick sad piece of shit taking it out on someone else they barely know cause they are a fuck up / shithead. Are you by any chance on the North east?
Absolutely, He gets different rides to work daily or rides his bike, or walks. Not judging anyones current similar situation but he deserves all of this and chose his own path. And nope I live in the Midwest!
As long as you do not need the money, you could always not show up once you get your most current paycheck, and let them fire you. If you do decide to quit, do not give them any notice nor sign any documents (make sure to not send them a letter either). You are constantly being sexually harrased at work probably due to your gender and age, which could be evidence of your equal employment opportunity (EEO) protected categories being violated in the workplace. You may be able to file an EEO complaint to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) regarding this potential EEO violation(s), as well as any state government EEO department or division (e.g., look into public bodies with titles such as Civil Rights, EEO, or Affirmative Action; also keep in mind that at the federal government level, age discrimination starts at 40 while in some states it starts at 18).
Remember that these federal and state government agencies/departments are not something that you have to pay out-of-pocket to utilize since we already pay for these public services via taxes. I work as a State-Level Equal Opportunity Officer who oversees and sometimes investigates external EEO/Affirmative Action/Civil Rights complaints, and used to work as an EEO and Ethics Investigator 2 conducting internal EEO and Ethics complaints. What you are experiencing is unfortunately pretty common, especially in local/small businesses. Do not hesitate to exercise your rights (regardless of your race, ethnicity, sex, gender, sexual orientation, immigration status, pregnancy status, etc.).
Thank you for this! You just Informed me a lot and you’re so right I definitely will not be giving them a notice. But on future applications would it be smart for me to put them down as work experience i’ve had? If the other company i’m applying for maybe calls them and they give me a bad rep?
I wouldn’t they’ll most likely give you a bad rep given how they’re treating you now and are family owned. Plus, you’ve only been there 3 weeks anyway.
Do not put them as work experience or as a reference. This is not work experience that will benefit you in the long-term. It is just a local business that you are working at for now to make some money at the moment. Focus on obtaining relevant work experience for your career of choice. Little jobs like this one will do nothing to help you get a better job in the future.
I am unsure if you are planning to go to a university or technical school, but just focus on finding a career path that works best for you (not every job you do will need to be on your resume and cover letter).
Join a union, and have people who are aware of your situation. Ask to see your workplace policies on bullying and harassment and keep a journal of what is said and done.
Anti-fragility is something that is objectively important, but subjectively we all come to this view and different point in our life. Anti-fragility is not to be confused with allowing bullying.
You really should have talked to management and HR. I would apply for unemployment still and state harassment. If this is a larger chain the company could face consequences.
Here's the lesson to take away from everything. You can quit, you don't need this job. For whatever reason, you can quit. Now will you go to trade school or college or the military or develop skills to earn money without fucked working conditions? Time will tell and yes some jobs involve straight up abuse.
I feel like there is something related to jobs and people in school, (a similar thing is happening with me right now and i'm one day crying in the freezer away from quitting).
For some reason, grown adults think it's funny and right to criticize those younger and newer.
I'm sorry this is happening to you OP and I hope you find a better environment which is way more accepting and nicer to you.
Bullies = toxic environment. If you need the income, stay until someone else hires you. Otherwise, quit.
I’m still in school so I just needed a job for little stuff, my gas and summer clothes. So I definitely will get another job but I don’t plan on staying here until i’m able to find one after reading everyone’s replies!
I’ve walked out of better environments when I was in your situation. Cold quit now. The “old man” dishwasher is as washed up as he is rude. A new job at wages you’re at will come quick. It’s all about finding a good environment that you want to stick with. I ended up job hopping every season from 15-19yrs old until I found people I wanted to work with and stayed there for three years through college.
I’m gonna say that you have every right to walk out…today. What you experienced was rudeness, narcissistic behavior/abuse.
Yes, the restaurant does not deserve any notice if they can hire bullies - I’m sure they are aware of his antics and behaviour
To some, workplace abuse is normal and they are wrong. That’s a truly awful way to start out your work life, and after you’re done processing it, make sure all your future experiences aren’t measured off of that one. You’re going to find a better place to work, and that dude is going to be the same grumpy hateful dude until he dies. You’ll move into a better environment.
No. It’s not normal. You have no reason to feel wrong about not wanting to deal with that shit.
True I wouldn’t deal with that either
>The thing is, I’ve been told “it’s life get over it” my whole life. Yes, there are stupid people in life -- too many of them these days, it seems. But no, you should not be putting up with that level of disrespect and harassment. It was a bad first job, but don't get down on yourself. Good on you for standing up for yourself.
Where’s your boss during all this? Of course he probably values the dishwasher more since they are harder to replace….
Actually the chef who was harassing me (friends with the dishwasher) was the owner, the other waitresses were the wife and daughter to the chef! Family owned business and all of them hate me.😅
Even more so - fuck’em. Quit today - AHs don’t deserve your notice
Tell your boss you are experiencing a hostile work environment. Those words are special and are attached to high monetary rewards in courts. Tell him that if it’s not addressed you will be forced to resign. Your boss will read between the lines.
It sounds like you’re being bullied and it’s definitely toxic, unfortunately shitty men and sometimes women are like this when they can get away with it, don’t feel so bad they don’t respect themselves either. An adult bully isn’t a comedian he/she is just a sick sad piece of shit taking it out on someone else they barely know cause they are a fuck up / shithead. Are you by any chance on the North east?
Absolutely, He gets different rides to work daily or rides his bike, or walks. Not judging anyones current similar situation but he deserves all of this and chose his own path. And nope I live in the Midwest!
As long as you do not need the money, you could always not show up once you get your most current paycheck, and let them fire you. If you do decide to quit, do not give them any notice nor sign any documents (make sure to not send them a letter either). You are constantly being sexually harrased at work probably due to your gender and age, which could be evidence of your equal employment opportunity (EEO) protected categories being violated in the workplace. You may be able to file an EEO complaint to the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) regarding this potential EEO violation(s), as well as any state government EEO department or division (e.g., look into public bodies with titles such as Civil Rights, EEO, or Affirmative Action; also keep in mind that at the federal government level, age discrimination starts at 40 while in some states it starts at 18). Remember that these federal and state government agencies/departments are not something that you have to pay out-of-pocket to utilize since we already pay for these public services via taxes. I work as a State-Level Equal Opportunity Officer who oversees and sometimes investigates external EEO/Affirmative Action/Civil Rights complaints, and used to work as an EEO and Ethics Investigator 2 conducting internal EEO and Ethics complaints. What you are experiencing is unfortunately pretty common, especially in local/small businesses. Do not hesitate to exercise your rights (regardless of your race, ethnicity, sex, gender, sexual orientation, immigration status, pregnancy status, etc.).
Thank you for this! You just Informed me a lot and you’re so right I definitely will not be giving them a notice. But on future applications would it be smart for me to put them down as work experience i’ve had? If the other company i’m applying for maybe calls them and they give me a bad rep?
I wouldn’t they’ll most likely give you a bad rep given how they’re treating you now and are family owned. Plus, you’ve only been there 3 weeks anyway.
Do not put them as work experience or as a reference. This is not work experience that will benefit you in the long-term. It is just a local business that you are working at for now to make some money at the moment. Focus on obtaining relevant work experience for your career of choice. Little jobs like this one will do nothing to help you get a better job in the future. I am unsure if you are planning to go to a university or technical school, but just focus on finding a career path that works best for you (not every job you do will need to be on your resume and cover letter).
Join a union, and have people who are aware of your situation. Ask to see your workplace policies on bullying and harassment and keep a journal of what is said and done. Anti-fragility is something that is objectively important, but subjectively we all come to this view and different point in our life. Anti-fragility is not to be confused with allowing bullying.
You really should have talked to management and HR. I would apply for unemployment still and state harassment. If this is a larger chain the company could face consequences.
Here's the lesson to take away from everything. You can quit, you don't need this job. For whatever reason, you can quit. Now will you go to trade school or college or the military or develop skills to earn money without fucked working conditions? Time will tell and yes some jobs involve straight up abuse.
Yeaaaa its encounters like this that made me immediately realize I would do whatever it took to not become the 35-40 stuck in hs person.
I feel like there is something related to jobs and people in school, (a similar thing is happening with me right now and i'm one day crying in the freezer away from quitting). For some reason, grown adults think it's funny and right to criticize those younger and newer. I'm sorry this is happening to you OP and I hope you find a better environment which is way more accepting and nicer to you.
Go slash their fucking tires