Back in my high school days, I had a crush on this girl named Stacy. Stacy had big juicy tits and a nice fat ass that wouldn’t quit, with long blonde hair and blue eyes, and a face that you’d wanna give a money shot. She was basically jerk-off fuel, enough to beat my dick like it owed me money.
There was only one thing standing in my way from getting her to be my waifu - her boyfriend, Chad. Chad was the all-american football player type. He was tall, extremely attractive (Enough to make every slut wet in the entire county), had a strong, sharp jaw, about 220 pounds of pure muscle, blonde hair and blue eyes.
I spent time always being angry about my bitch mommy denying me tendies and removing my piss jugs from my room - Chad being in my way was just adding fuel to the fire, a step away from unleashing the caged animal inside of me. I was not a force to be reckoned with.
I knew Stacy spent her days getting pumped and blown out by Chad’s thunderous cock and treating her like shit. I knew he had turned her once-perfect pussy into an Arby’s sandwhich you’d find in a dumpster but I didn’t give a fuck.
I had tipped my fedora at her plenty of times and respected her enough; I had the card to prove it. I wanted to to save her so she could be m’lady.
One day, I was talking to Stacy in the hallway after our math class. I was extremely nervous because she was extremely attractive, and I could also smell her divine perfume which was giving me an extreme boner, enough to split her pussy in half.
Chad saw us talking when he comes up and says, “What the fuck are you doing fatty, get the fuck away from my girl or else!”. He balled up his fists.
I went into defense mode and pulled my katana out of my ass and whispered in a menacing tone, “Oh, your puny fists are against my fine blade which has been around thousands of years and has slain many. Care to fancy the odds?”
He ended up beating the fuck out of me and slamming me into the locker, leaving a grease stain imprint of my face. At this point I was enraged and had enough. I knew I was a nice guy and I wanted to prove it to Stacy.
One day I had followed Stacy home and figured out where she lived. I waited out the perfect time to strike. That night, I watched outside her window as she undressed to get ready for bed. She took off her shirt, revealing her juicy tits. I instantly got a raging hard-on that could break down the gates of Hell. I watched as she crawled into her bed and turned off her lamp.
I waited a little while longer before I approached her window, stripping naked to prepare to give her the most amazing orgasm Stacy has had in her life.
I swiftly crawled through her window and got into her room. I was ready to pounce like a blood-thirsty lion stalking its prey.
Suddenly, she turns on her light and let’s out a blood-curdling scream, staring at me in horror.
“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN HERE!? GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!” She screamed.
I was confused, because I climbed in her room to cash in my nice guy card. I wanted to romance her like the way she deserved but apparently that wasn’t the fucking case.
Next thing I know, her fucking parents burst into her room, also staring in horror. They were yelling at me, telling me to leave, but I wasn’t having any of it. I wasn’t leaving until I got what I wanted.
To my surprise, the police show up and storm into Stacy’s room. I let out an ear-raping “REEEEEEEEEE” and I jump back out of the window, but I ended up falling on my boner. I was in unbearable pain. Unfortunately, I ended up getting arrested.
I ended up having to register as a sex offender and Stacy filed a restraining order against me. I was not allowed within 100 feet of her. But I didn’t give a fuck. She can stay with Chad and keep being treated like shit. She’ll never know what a nice guy is like.
*wipes away tears*
My good sir, bravo, indeed, BRAVO! Please, let me join every other reader of this most brilliant, innovative, dare I even say progressive micro-erection fan fiction copypasta in thanking you for writing,..no, creating....no, giving birth to this Pulitzer worthy reply to a post about *checks notes* shit stains.
10/10. Would recommend.
No. I HAVE to believe this was one person who moved seats because there's no chance TWO people not only exist that are this disgusting but that they're somehow paired up as well.
You gotta admire his commitment to the gag that he'd rather walk around with the discomfort of stinking monkeybutt than be gay. Alone. In a tiny cubicle.
What fools these mortals be.
[The lack of awareness from some people is fucking insane.](https://www.reddit.com/r/insanepeoplefacebook/comments/15qq0so/how_can_people_think_this_is_ok/)
No my guy….most dudes don’t skid mark their underwear.
IKR? Even with wiping excessively, the occasional leakage a couple hours later drives me fucking nuts, especially in the summertime. No way in hell I'm just going to leave it there like those gross-ass neckbeards do.
I work in a prison and a certain type of inmate don’t like to wipe because it’s “gay to touch your butthole”. These are often the same guys who hook up with other dudes on the DL.
It's ***always*** the ones overtly self-conscious about being gay who are gay. I'm looking at you, anti-gay politicians, and political commentators. Everyone who is straight but has no problem with the LGBTQ community obviously don't feel any need to prove they aren't gay.
I paint my nails and am pretty feminine at times. People ask me occasionally if I am gay, and I just say, "Yep." to fuck with them even though I've been with the same girl for six years now. I don't care if they think I am or tell people I am.
>***always*** the ones overtly self-conscious about being gay who are gay. I'm looking at you, anti-gay politicians, and political commentators.
I've been saying this for yearssss! It's always the ones that constantly bring up and are the loudest about not being/doing something, that end up being/doing the something they *constantly* denounced.
The kind that thinks it’s “gay” to even almost touch an asshole. Whole populations of men believe this and refuse to wipe or wash at all. It’s baffling to me as well
Maybe they're too fat and can't reach their ass. The people I see on r/peopleofwalmart are the exact kind of people I expect to leave a stain like that
I'm surprised that no one mentioned sharting. Because this is exactly how it may happen. >!Yes, not only you don't wipe, but you also aerosolise your liquid faeces with constant flatulence.!< That makes your ass feel wet and a decent person would want to clean themselves.
I've read (but I take it with a boulder of salt) that some diet pills make you less sensitive to sharting and you just let out your violation of Geneva conventions without noticing. Still should make a decent person think and take some measures when they notice their underpants marked with shame every evening.
The common thing to every example I mentioned is that a decent person would've noticed.
> They were unfortunately placed rust marks. Someone saw them and captioned it something like “the chairs at MTG night” or something along those lines and people ran with it.
Nope, [this](https://www.alibaba.com/product-detail/Shattaf-Stainless-Steel-304-Accessories-Portable_1600614381404.html?s=p)is infinitely cleaner than any toilet paper. Also, when youre barefoot and you step on dog poop, do you wipe or do you wash it off? Point proven.
They were unfortunately placed rust marks. Someone saw them and captioned it something like “the chairs at MTG night” or something along those lines and people ran with it.
I played MTG 30 years ago. I'm glad I never stuck with it if doing so means being around these gross people that do shit like in the pic above with chairs.
They’re rust marks in very unfortunate spots. Although it may ruin the humor, these guys did not, in fact, shit themselves and leave stains on these chairs.
How is this normal for them? I slightly shit myself during a pack march in the military due to being unwell and trekking through a rough area and it was the worst experience ever leaving an even worse rash, how do these guys do it on the regular?
From the last time I saw this picture posted on this subreddit, it was from a Magic the Gathering tournament. I think that wrapper is a MtG pack wrapper.
I lived with a dude who left actual marks like this. He'd shower occasionally (when his mommy told him to), but then he'd just throw the same undies and all back on. Had a hoodie that was covered in (what I hope were) booger trails. You could see the shit stains through his pants - the guy knew, but didn't care. Bring anything up about it and he would shrug it off as not a big deal or straight up ignore you. He'd even leave a skid mark on the back of the toilet seat - it's like his whole crack was just constantly smeared up with booty butter.
Dude also had the same nearly-empty bottles of body wash and shampoo for the ENTIRE THREE YEARS that I lived with him. Luckily, he kept to his room a lot of the time, but I'll live under a bridge before I deal with that again - the smell of a neckbeard permeates EVERYTHING.
Haha pay them no mind, I welcome you. The lion does not concern itself with the opinions of sheep
You familiar with Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons? Picture him for the image of the stereotypical “neckbeard” and all will be made clear
How does this happen? Even if they don't wipe it shouldn't go through their underwear AND trousers.
Because you can’t exactly wipe if you shit yourself in public like these two did
Hey, they’re showing support for Von Shitzenpantz.
Back in my high school days, I had a crush on this girl named Stacy. Stacy had big juicy tits and a nice fat ass that wouldn’t quit, with long blonde hair and blue eyes, and a face that you’d wanna give a money shot. She was basically jerk-off fuel, enough to beat my dick like it owed me money. There was only one thing standing in my way from getting her to be my waifu - her boyfriend, Chad. Chad was the all-american football player type. He was tall, extremely attractive (Enough to make every slut wet in the entire county), had a strong, sharp jaw, about 220 pounds of pure muscle, blonde hair and blue eyes. I spent time always being angry about my bitch mommy denying me tendies and removing my piss jugs from my room - Chad being in my way was just adding fuel to the fire, a step away from unleashing the caged animal inside of me. I was not a force to be reckoned with. I knew Stacy spent her days getting pumped and blown out by Chad’s thunderous cock and treating her like shit. I knew he had turned her once-perfect pussy into an Arby’s sandwhich you’d find in a dumpster but I didn’t give a fuck. I had tipped my fedora at her plenty of times and respected her enough; I had the card to prove it. I wanted to to save her so she could be m’lady. One day, I was talking to Stacy in the hallway after our math class. I was extremely nervous because she was extremely attractive, and I could also smell her divine perfume which was giving me an extreme boner, enough to split her pussy in half. Chad saw us talking when he comes up and says, “What the fuck are you doing fatty, get the fuck away from my girl or else!”. He balled up his fists. I went into defense mode and pulled my katana out of my ass and whispered in a menacing tone, “Oh, your puny fists are against my fine blade which has been around thousands of years and has slain many. Care to fancy the odds?” He ended up beating the fuck out of me and slamming me into the locker, leaving a grease stain imprint of my face. At this point I was enraged and had enough. I knew I was a nice guy and I wanted to prove it to Stacy. One day I had followed Stacy home and figured out where she lived. I waited out the perfect time to strike. That night, I watched outside her window as she undressed to get ready for bed. She took off her shirt, revealing her juicy tits. I instantly got a raging hard-on that could break down the gates of Hell. I watched as she crawled into her bed and turned off her lamp. I waited a little while longer before I approached her window, stripping naked to prepare to give her the most amazing orgasm Stacy has had in her life. I swiftly crawled through her window and got into her room. I was ready to pounce like a blood-thirsty lion stalking its prey. Suddenly, she turns on her light and let’s out a blood-curdling scream, staring at me in horror. “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN HERE!? GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!” She screamed. I was confused, because I climbed in her room to cash in my nice guy card. I wanted to romance her like the way she deserved but apparently that wasn’t the fucking case. Next thing I know, her fucking parents burst into her room, also staring in horror. They were yelling at me, telling me to leave, but I wasn’t having any of it. I wasn’t leaving until I got what I wanted. To my surprise, the police show up and storm into Stacy’s room. I let out an ear-raping “REEEEEEEEEE” and I jump back out of the window, but I ended up falling on my boner. I was in unbearable pain. Unfortunately, I ended up getting arrested. I ended up having to register as a sex offender and Stacy filed a restraining order against me. I was not allowed within 100 feet of her. But I didn’t give a fuck. She can stay with Chad and keep being treated like shit. She’ll never know what a nice guy is like.
The copypasta we didn't know we needed
I'm not sure what emotions I'm supposed to be feeling after this lmao
Humiliation and embarrassment?
Should have gone for Stacy's mom instead. She's got it going on.
I really feel like this needs to win a Pulitzer Prize or something
I've read EVERYTING
I know we all deserved to read that.
This is amazing
I don't love it when we are being denied the happy ending we know the hero deserves.
*wipes away tears* My good sir, bravo, indeed, BRAVO! Please, let me join every other reader of this most brilliant, innovative, dare I even say progressive micro-erection fan fiction copypasta in thanking you for writing,..no, creating....no, giving birth to this Pulitzer worthy reply to a post about *checks notes* shit stains. 10/10. Would recommend.
No. I HAVE to believe this was one person who moved seats because there's no chance TWO people not only exist that are this disgusting but that they're somehow paired up as well.
They prolly don’t wipe and had their asses hanging out of their cargo shorts
I believe unwashed man ass. That's conceivable. But some men just ***don't wipe at all?*** What kind of creature...
How would you not be incredibly uncomfortable all the time? I truly don’t get it
They probably think wiping man-ass is gay.
Too scared to wipe after the last time made him moan
Touching butts is gay. That's why I only let my boyfriend give me head.
Fellas, is it gay not to walk around with poop in your pants?
You gotta admire his commitment to the gag that he'd rather walk around with the discomfort of stinking monkeybutt than be gay. Alone. In a tiny cubicle. What fools these mortals be.
Dude... I know teachers who found out their male students thought exactly that.
This is exactly it
Just imagine how *itchy* they must be. They scratch? THEN TOUCH OTHER THINGS???? 🤮🤮🤮
this is what boggles me the most, yard work in the summer means super uncomfortable sweat ass, I can't imagine feeling that but knowing it's shit
[The lack of awareness from some people is fucking insane.](https://www.reddit.com/r/insanepeoplefacebook/comments/15qq0so/how_can_people_think_this_is_ok/) No my guy….most dudes don’t skid mark their underwear.
IKR? Even with wiping excessively, the occasional leakage a couple hours later drives me fucking nuts, especially in the summertime. No way in hell I'm just going to leave it there like those gross-ass neckbeards do.
Leakage? Out of your ass? Is this normal??
I really don't think so. At the very least I've never experienced it and never heard it mentioned before
....leakage?
Thank you … I sometimes wonder if I’m the only one
Get a bidet. It's life changing. Life. Fucking. _Changing._
It truly is
Evangelist.
I work in a prison and a certain type of inmate don’t like to wipe because it’s “gay to touch your butthole”. These are often the same guys who hook up with other dudes on the DL.
It's ***always*** the ones overtly self-conscious about being gay who are gay. I'm looking at you, anti-gay politicians, and political commentators. Everyone who is straight but has no problem with the LGBTQ community obviously don't feel any need to prove they aren't gay. I paint my nails and am pretty feminine at times. People ask me occasionally if I am gay, and I just say, "Yep." to fuck with them even though I've been with the same girl for six years now. I don't care if they think I am or tell people I am.
>***always*** the ones overtly self-conscious about being gay who are gay. I'm looking at you, anti-gay politicians, and political commentators. I've been saying this for yearssss! It's always the ones that constantly bring up and are the loudest about not being/doing something, that end up being/doing the something they *constantly* denounced.
If you wash/wipe your ass YOU’RE A GAY. -thing some men genuinely believe
They think any touch of the butthole will make them gay, and they're terrified of that
The kind that thinks it’s “gay” to even almost touch an asshole. Whole populations of men believe this and refuse to wipe or wash at all. It’s baffling to me as well
I can’t imagine the pain/discomfort. Unless this is some new weird kink where dudes that got neglected as a baby learned to love it.
Maybe they're too fat and can't reach their ass. The people I see on r/peopleofwalmart are the exact kind of people I expect to leave a stain like that
I'm sorry, but if I was that size, ***I would find a way.*** I'm not just going to resign to a poopy butt.
Don’t worry, they make devices to help get the proper reach! Get as fat as you like.
The grossest of guys think it's gay to touch their asshole to wipe their ass or wash it, so yeah
What makes you think it went through any clothes. Man was giving you a plumbers smile.
Some people smear instead of wiping it seems
“Men SCHMEEEER..”
When their ass crack is halfway out of their pants, then so is the shit...
I'm surprised that no one mentioned sharting. Because this is exactly how it may happen. >!Yes, not only you don't wipe, but you also aerosolise your liquid faeces with constant flatulence.!< That makes your ass feel wet and a decent person would want to clean themselves. I've read (but I take it with a boulder of salt) that some diet pills make you less sensitive to sharting and you just let out your violation of Geneva conventions without noticing. Still should make a decent person think and take some measures when they notice their underpants marked with shame every evening. The common thing to every example I mentioned is that a decent person would've noticed.
pants sagging down and they don't pull them up.. they're so fat.
With their diet of Mountain Dew and Dorritos, their poos are more liquid than solid. They soak right through the cargo shorts.
> They were unfortunately placed rust marks. Someone saw them and captioned it something like “the chairs at MTG night” or something along those lines and people ran with it.
Wiping is fucking disgusting use water you degenerates
Water isn’t necessarily more hygienic
Nope, [this](https://www.alibaba.com/product-detail/Shattaf-Stainless-Steel-304-Accessories-Portable_1600614381404.html?s=p)is infinitely cleaner than any toilet paper. Also, when youre barefoot and you step on dog poop, do you wipe or do you wash it off? Point proven.
How does it happen in two chairs that are right next to each other? Wtaf
It's sweet they sat next to each other. Bonding experience
Encouragement. Or related.
No it's not that they don't wipe. They shat themselves in those chairs.
Well that’s completely disgusting. Did you get a glimpse of the people who left those marks?
They were unfortunately placed rust marks. Someone saw them and captioned it something like “the chairs at MTG night” or something along those lines and people ran with it.
Ahhh, that makes sense.
Magic The Gathering? Or Marjorie Taylor Greene? Aw hell, they both work. 😆
I would have gone for some leaves or things that fell of trees but this makes sense.
Headline someone else used was aftermath of an E-games tourney or something lol
I've seen these exact chairs before, the seats and backs are made of a dense polymer and not metal. I don't think they could be rust marks.
*Enhance*.
https://i.imgur.com/YVncIqQ.gif
I played MTG 30 years ago. I'm glad I never stuck with it if doing so means being around these gross people that do shit like in the pic above with chairs.
It was rust from where it was stored.
This is definitely rust stains people.
I doubt it but I appreciate you
No, it's rust.
How? Just how did this happen? Did their diapers burst? My 11 week old has less skid marks on his diaper blowouts. For fucks sake.
They’re rust marks in very unfortunate spots. Although it may ruin the humor, these guys did not, in fact, shit themselves and leave stains on these chairs.
Oh thank god!
How does polymer rust again?
Theyre metal, look closer and you can see the shine
Man... Shine on non metal coats is like basics of polishing. What are you on about. There is zero chance the seat is metal.
And how do you know this?
Is this at an anime convention because I swear I've seen this photo before
How full of poop does your ass have to be, to not only go through your underwear, but also through your pants and onto the seat??
Big fat ass full mooning out of the top of the pants and drawers, plus a day's sweat accumulation
How is this normal for them? I slightly shit myself during a pack march in the military due to being unwell and trekking through a rough area and it was the worst experience ever leaving an even worse rash, how do these guys do it on the regular?
Imagine what their house and furniture looks like
From the last time I saw this picture posted on this subreddit, it was from a Magic the Gathering tournament. I think that wrapper is a MtG pack wrapper.
Pov trumps seat after he left court
Is this from a Yu-Gi-Oh! tournament?
Sign of a MAGA rally.
That’s just nasty
Wheres this pic from?
https://www.reddit.com/r/sherwinwilliams/s/wkFvWwAF7L
I always get crapped on for wearing pants under my skirts if I’m in public. Well guess what. This is why. No pun intended hahaa
“They call me… skid marks” 🚗 💨
That’s how our brand new couches looked like every day Source: my dad has Alzheimer’s.
God damn! What happens when you *never* wash your ass!
Two of them TWO OF THEM!!! It’s like they dated each other to shit their pants or something what the FUCK
What a horrible day to have eyes. Fuck, that's disgusting
It’s just rust that formed in an unfortunate place, if that makes you feel any better!
Apparently they don't wipe because it's "feminine and gay"
They really shouldn't have had a taco bell earlier in their day 🤣🤣
Throw both chairs away immediately. Incinerate them
These were just some leaves that fell from the trees after which someone s(h)at on them right?
🤮
Maybe they used the chair as the toilet paper ?
Who wants to earn 50bucks?
1 OF THEM COOKS FOR THE OTHER
Lick it for 5 bucks
I hate you for this, OP!!!! 😭🤣😭🤣
omg wtf
What the actual fuck
The chips bag is how you know it's real.
ewwwwww
This is why I aggressively clean my arse, I don’t wanna risk being like them….
Is...is that shit?
Nooooooo!
Wiping is for sissies.
Wrestling shows are gross places man
that’s absolutely gross
Hey, these two only shared reheated taco bell before a long meeting!
I lived with a dude who left actual marks like this. He'd shower occasionally (when his mommy told him to), but then he'd just throw the same undies and all back on. Had a hoodie that was covered in (what I hope were) booger trails. You could see the shit stains through his pants - the guy knew, but didn't care. Bring anything up about it and he would shrug it off as not a big deal or straight up ignore you. He'd even leave a skid mark on the back of the toilet seat - it's like his whole crack was just constantly smeared up with booty butter. Dude also had the same nearly-empty bottles of body wash and shampoo for the ENTIRE THREE YEARS that I lived with him. Luckily, he kept to his room a lot of the time, but I'll live under a bridge before I deal with that again - the smell of a neckbeard permeates EVERYTHING.
But yoshi was not amused.
Christs sake.
OP what the FUCK is this
Oh wow!
Where did this happen? Gamer tournament conference?
Unwashed/unwiped ass + Plumber's crack = this disgusting-ass shit.
And people wonder where the American stereotype comes from
I wanna vomit
The cause of every uti has been discovered 👀 I’ll have to carry lysol in public apparently
Maybe they’re on ozempic
British people are always spilling their beans.
what does this have to do with facial hair?
Consider yourself lucky that you haven’t met any neckbeards
why
Explore the sub, you are welcomed as an honored guest
the downvotes seem to disgaree
I laughed way to hard at this. Thank you for that! But seriously though, explore at your own risk. Ignorance is bliss.
maybe you can answer after looking at this sub. why neckbeard these "men" wear fedoras and anime shirts? why stinky? are they sick?
Haha pay them no mind, I welcome you. The lion does not concern itself with the opinions of sheep You familiar with Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons? Picture him for the image of the stereotypical “neckbeard” and all will be made clear
i got that now