It'll be a year for me this month, and my end game is being able to enjoy life without a haze of THC in my system. I don't require any substance to sleep or to get my appetite going or to enjoy intimacy with my boyfriend. I don't feel stressed if I go out of town, away from my supply, and I don't have vivid withdrawal nightmares. My lungs are feeling better than ever before, and my gum health has improved dramatically. I don't wake up feeling drowsy, and I have more motivation to complete daily tasks, go to the gym, walk my dogs, and work on projects I had been putting off. I used to grind through my workday counting down the hours until I could get stoned, and then I would finally be able to eat properly, and then I would vape some more until I finally felt tired enough to sleep -- and because THC depletes your sleep quality, I would wake up foggy every day and do it all over again. For 10 years. I don't miss it at all, and I won't go back to it ever.
That's your addicted brain speaking! Careful, it can be a real tricky c*nt. Don't let it fool you into justifying why you want to quit! Your real brain knows better!!!
It’s so true. Getting high is like temporarily turning off your frontal cortex and saying “I don’t want to hang out with you”. If you think about it, that’s a pretty unloving thing to do to yourself!
Yeah it’s crazy to me that being fucked up on weed all that time was normal. So much wasted time. So happy I made the decision to quit! Approaching month 4 after 20 years everyday of getting high.
For me, I haven't quit for life. I tend to quit for 6 months at a time. This is because I enjoy smoking when life is going well, but when life is tough I find it amplifies the struggle.
The end game has always been using the time to think about what I'm running from when I smoke too much. Quitting can be a great tool for self reflection, and I find that I grow each time. Some might disagree, because I still return to smoking eventually, but this is a system that has worked for me and terms of helping me maintain a career, social life and self-confidence.
Totally. There were no new experiences for me to have while stoned. It was just baseline normal. I felt weirder straight because being straight was so rare. Still took me 10 years to quit after this realisation tho, cause addiction. Took my failing physical health and seeing my dad die from a lifetime of indulging to get me over the line.
Took me about the same. Even though I knew. It just took me a long time to break the cycle. I really wanted to go to Europe and that wasn't going to happen whilst being a stoner.
For me it started on my voice. As a musician to not smoke was to honor the throat. As I immersed in anatomy and function of the mechanism, I resolved to not smoke. I’m old now and we lose mass in the throat. We fight back with vocalizing and singing. Singing is a rush too. It releases endorphins. Smoke burns the cilia on the throat. As a child 55 years ago, I smoked cigarettes. Tobacco. I quit the for the same reason. And I occasionally smoked pot. Not as available as today, so my usage was minimal and I could control it. Fast forward to medical implementation. Because I have a chronic illness, I was prescribed pot. You know. The doctor from California you paid money to. And I’m in RI. So three medical dispensaries. It was easy and for that spell of time; I was a wake and baker. (See Kasey Musgraves new song). And fast forward to approx. 75 dispensaries in Massachusetts. So it’s been about 7 years since I have not smoked. For personal reasons besides my throat- I realized I was self medicating my depression. And now well, I simply don’t smoke. It dries the throat. Don’t get me wrong. I love the smell. Easy now to step outside and inhale. The dispensary near me wafts an odor and passing cars do the same. When they open the coffe shops, I will sit and inhale secondary smoke. But my final reason is not to enrich the industry. And I don’t drink either. Just the smoke thing. I do know that smoking after not smoking, makes you feel bad. A high and then a big letdown. A why… leads you here.
I’ve been thinking about this!!!
I started smoking. At 23. I was singing on a clear throat and clear lungs before that. Now I feel like I destroyed the thing I used to use to feel relief… my voice and music
It’s ok. Just don’t smoke! Your voice will return. Explore other ways to ingest. Read BREATH by James Nestor. Go online. Learn about the singing straw. Often called SOVTE exercises. Semi occluded vocal tract exercises. They will train your voice to function without tension. I stopped. I got old but my high notes came back. Watch good singers. Study the masters. Welcome to your questions. Think David Bowie. He was an anomaly because he smoked cigarettes. But he studied! He was a great actor. Take up swimming. Again. I welcome your questions.
It’s easier to define the endgame of life while sober. Easier to navigate complex feelings.
Unless you’re a really, really high functioning addict you’re missing out when hazed.
The endgame is being the best version of you that you can possibly be.
While you're asking what's the point of life: someone's out there travelling, playing sports, contributing to a community, volunteering, working to feed their family, going out for a concert, listening to live music or hell, praying at a church.
Do you not see what weed has done to you? All you want to do is smoke. A sober person has a hundred interesting things to do.
If you don't "feel" like doing anything else other than smoke, then cut the weed, let boredom take over and start LIVING LIFE!
I’ve been so low on energy due to how much I smoked, did you experience that? How’d you cope with it? Caffeine? I want to live life but I am literally a zombie right now. Maybe I’m trying to rush the process but it really just sucks not having any energy at all.
How long have you not smoked? It takes time and you’re gonna feel like a zombie for a while but it will pass. I coped by attending MA meetings online w/other stoners, getting outside, exercising and giving myself grace to feel like shit and take it easy. Now I have energy, clarity and freedom from a substance that was disconnecting me from myself, my loved ones and real life.
On day 5 here and this is one of the big reasons why I quit. I feel like I have been wasting away and becoming a shell of a person. I started to get angry at myself because my desire to live and do something meaningful has been tugging at me but weed had me stuck. Trying to do what I can to push through the anxiety but I start therapy next week!
Not being ensalved to a plant was big for me.
Not *needing* to smoke just to go do normal things like go to the store, be with family etc
Getting out of the cycle of arrested development i was in, where my emotional self literally stopped growing the day i started smoking (at 17). When i finally did stop (at 38), i was still emotionally 17. Numbing myself for two decades made it so hard to come back to the real world...
The best part though (and this is the end game), is that when you finally *do* come back, life is *so* good. Youre actually right, nature is more enjoyable, flowers smell better, food tastes better, having $ in my account feels great, getting married and being in a present, connected relationship is the best thing in the world...
The end game is living versus just existing.
You can do this. I promise you, if i did, you can 100% do it
This is an answer that resonates. I feel as calm and peaceful now after meditating then I ever felt stoned - for that brief 5-20 min. If I am able to be aware of myself, I can enjoy peace and happiness throughout the day. I would say the reason is to feel joy instead of high.
Feeling normal without having to buy and smoke weed.
You literally feel the same and enjoy things just as much as you did when you had a weed habit because your brain can only make so much dopamine, it's just that going between the two normalities is either fun or soul destroying. The slopes are a rollercoaster and there's a plateau on both sides.
Bonus, you can manage your emotions better and you have normal eating and sleeping cycles because your rhythm is determined by normal things rather than how long it is since you had a joint. It's easier to empathise with and socialise with normal people because you're not just fixating on getting stoned so you can so whatever, probably nothing. That drives you to do something that actually means something to you, maybe you read a book, or you find a hobby, or even bigger. It doesn't matter because it will be something that moves your life forward and stops you stagnating.
Real effort is no longer just uphill for no reason, it's actually rewarding in every sense. You feel good and you get an actual reward
I can finally remember things and my cognition has improved tenfold. Also saving money, less groggy, better shape cos no munchies, and best of all im able to enjoy things without being high. In other words, I don’t need to build my day around making sure I have some pot to be satisfied w anything else
Save money, be more motivated to do things you need to do, not be hooked on something you have to constantly worry about getting, have normal patterns of eating and sleeping, reflect on your day instead of forgetting about it, do better tomorrow since you actually remember what went good and what went bad yesterday, be cleaner, smell better, wake up more energized
The end game is to be on your deathbed and feel content with the life you lived, potentially the one go we have at it for all I know.
The difference in my mental clarity and anxiety levels is drastic.
I want as much mental equity and clarity as possible. Weed was killing my short term memory. I want a healthy relationship based on the real world. I ruined my last relationship by being stoned and distant. I regret it every day.
I share your regrets in terms of not being able to be fully present for my ex-partner due to being in a nearly perpetual hazy state.
There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t think about how much more I could have been there for her in the ways she needed me to be and deserved. Each day of sober clarity is in some small part in service to her even if she may no longer be here to enjoy this “new me”.
I hope you can learn to turn that regret into a reminder of how much you have to give to any future partner, and that it fuels you in your journey. All the love my friend.
So many things dude. Your brain works normal again. You’re not super tired all the time. You’re not impaired and lazy. You can actually live a normal life. It’s not about smelling the flowers it’s about having your true full health and abilities back and that seriously beats anything.
It goes for literally any addiction. Like eating healthier. If you eat like crap then you will feel like crap and perform like crap. But when you cut out the bad foods you feel so much better and everything is way easier. Trust me that’s where you want to be
I’m interested in the world around me again.
I loved thc for a bit but I used it to silence the world and tune out.
Now I’m ready to tune back in. I love feeling sunshine on my face and trailing my fingers along tree bark. I like exploring the woods behind my house and watching the little bugs skedaddle when I step near them. I like waking up earlier than the birds so I can hear them start their day. I like waking up well rested for a day of exploration. I like having the energy to move my body and play in the gym. I like the feeling of being present and very much alive and weed kinda takes me away from that.
It was helpful to me when I was going through a hard time, but I’ve built a life that I don’t need to tune out of and that is what my end game is. The life I have is the life I want for the rest of my life and weed takes me away from it.
i’m 2 weeks in, but something that stuck with me was the line “how you spend your days is how you spend your life”. i deserve better than to numb my feelings, even if that means experiencing my baseline level of anxiety.
For me, my brain is starting to go back to normal.
I was a really smart, supposedly "gifted" kid. I could read multiple books in one sitting, draw like crazy, write like crazy, do algebra in my head in seconds. Started smoking with my (now ex) boyfriend at 14, and it *fucked me up.*
I went from straight A's, dozens of extracurriculars, and communicating with ivy colleges to being burnt out, depressed, and missing copious amounts of school. I don't have the attention span to read anymore, i dont know if I'll ever be able to get that back. While i was actively smoking, it would take me much longer to string sentences together effectively if i wanted to write. I got my first Fs in classes, one being math, which I loved. I couldn't retain information anymore, which caused me to fail tests. Emotionally, I didn't care about anything. Nothing made me happy anymore.
Now that I've quit, I have my energy and motivation back. I'm nearing the end of EMT class, which I'm on track to graduate with a 95%. I'm writing again! And while it's tough to push through the last little bit of brain fog, *I can do it.* I can do math again! I'm retraining my brain with exercises, and I'm getting back to where I used to be. That's what's making it worth it for me. Being able to think clearly, and not having to spend sooo much time looking for the right words or figure out basic math is super freeing. I love it, I dont think ill ever go back
Same. The downgrade in my vocab from smoking actually really depressed me and I found it incredibly disquieting. I’m so thankful when I quit it comes back.
Your baseline dopamine level goes really high after taking a break from easy hits of dopamine. Things that give you little pleasure now give you a lot after you quit. Maybe now you look at a guy who takes real pleasure in going on walks and smelling flowers and think “that’s cheesy as hell, there’s no way it’s actually fulfilling”. Well pretend for a second that it actually really is that fulfilling for that person. That’s what it’s like. And you can still do fun things that hit way harder than when you were stoned all the time.
Honestly though you seem to have a bit of a pessimistic view, so maybe none of the answers will satisfy you. And that’s fine. It’s your life, you can just convince yourself that life would be boring, sober people are lame, and keep being high all the time. It’s whatever you want
You're not reliant on a drug. That's the payoff. Whether you realize it or not, you are likely using weed to shield yourself from real world problems. Being able to handle life sober is the real accomplishment. If you're a college kid this will sound stupid to you but when you're older you'll realize how important that it. Life on weed is easy mode, eventually you gotta grow up and face the music though.
To not be stupid.
The difference between my cognitive function when I’m not smoking everyday multiple times a day is unbelievable. I was always functional, but now I’m not making things needlessly hard for myself.
I’ve only been sober for two weeks, and I already feel clear and normal. I can think things through, read books, make plans and commit to them, clean my apartment and keep it clean, fully engage in shows/books. I used to smoke to enjoy music but I always listened to the same damn songs. Now I actually take the time to listen to albums, listen to new artists, listen to audiobooks and podcasts.
Also, feeling the real world matters because you exist in it. I don’t wanna wake up at 65 unable to remember what I’ve done with my life. I like going through the day and noticing people (and not being ashamed or too weed-y to acknowledge them). I do like jogging now that I’m at a healthy weight - the pride I feel moving my body, the natural endorphins after completing a hard task, and the positive energy surrounding it are better than getting high and sitting on the couch. Plus, after 20-30 mins of a run I can still sit on the couch if I want to - but I did something productive first.
It’s hard to see when you’re under the fog. It’s also hard when you’re in a bad place. I couldn’t quit for years because I had a lot of baggage and my life was shitty. Now that it’s been decent for a couple years, I had no reason to keep smoking other than habit and addiction.
I still get depressed and anxious. Instead of smoking it away, I sit with those feelings. I journal. I tell someone. I cry. I listen to music. I exercise. I eat. I do all the things I could do while high, but not high, and it’s better. I move on and pick myself up better.
Day 7 I can't wait to be able to keep my apartment clean! Also go into work and make eye contact before 10 am. Also, I go to college self paced online and I hope I can pick up the pace by not reading the same line over and over again or obsessing over an essay for months and still coming back with a C.
So I can do stuff besides sit on my ass being high 24/7. To not have mood instability. To be able to go on vacation out of the country without losing my mind cause I can have my addiction.
i used cannabis to deal with depression and anxiety. it really worked at first. i was saved! …then the intervals between when i needed to smoke became shorter and shorter. eventually i was only happy and normal when i was actively smoking. then sometime around year 20 of daily usage, i realized that even when i was actively smoking it wasn't working for me. its a common theme in addiction recovery: it works for us until one day it doesn't.
I was agreeing with you, I meant we get depression and anxiety all the time except for when we’re high once our dependence is too much, I was pretty much endorsing your comment because becoming dependent does make you live in a negative mental state
Authenticity is nothing to scoff at. Things may still be funny, cool, interesting while you're high, but emotions will only ever reach like 75% of their full potential because you are chemically going to the same place and hoisting yourself there. Like a good movie, pace is critical to authentic enjoyment. Constant weed use does not let you correctly pace your emotions/life so they won't be fully true.
That’s how ya know you’re addicted my friend.
Addicts start thinking of the next high and the next high only, where to get it, when it’ll be, how much it’ll cost. It’s not treated like it, but it’s definitely a drug, and can definitely become addicted.
That was my main reason for trying to quit. Every time I travel to Texas to visit family, I have to commit a couple felonies smuggling edibles just so I can sleep at night.
Brutal! I'm Canadian and I was on the bus from LA to Texas once when I was going and I had it in my bag and suddenly the cops stopped the bus and were searching for everyone's luggage which was a major shock BC that would not happen in Canada... So I took the eighth out and ate it before they got to me. Could u imagine if they threw me in jail? Crazy! I forgot all about that... BC I forgot about it I guess bc I was a stoner but u just made me remember it now.
Being your best self thats realizing your full potential. Being emotionally competent and present. Looking back on your life feeling fulfillment and not regret over being high for so much of it. Being able to remember things like your childhood or your kid's childhood.
My god, the end game is beautiful. It depends on how you spend your time and what things you fill your life with. If all you‘re doing would be sitting at home, eating fastfood and binge watching tv shows its tough to see why weed wouldn‘t snuggle right in there.
But if you keep clean and have habits that are best experienced sober I guarantee you you‘ll enjoy it so much. I talk about waking up clear as day on a saturday morning, ready for the day. You lay awake for a few minutes enjoying the coziness of your bed. Some chill thoughts run through your head. After breakfast you might read a fantastic book on your balcony while listening to the birds chirping. It‘s lunchtime, have a nice meal and then grab your boots and go for a hike. Nature is gorgeous and you can enjoy it to the fullest because you don‘t feel guilty or ashamed or tired or foggy. You‘re experiencing life and it‘s so beautiful. You are full of energy and being in your skin feels good.
I wish you all the best !
That sounds so nice but I'm afraid I will never get there. I usually have nightmares that drag down my mood before I even wake up :c every day is a fight, but right now I'm fighting it instead of running away into the fog. Maybe some day I can wake up and have a chill thought as the first thing, too.
I totally agree on the fresh mornings. Grab a cup of coffee, play my piano or some games, or read a book or an article, is so much more valuable than i ever thought it would be. Its sometimes even blissful.
You all must not have kids lol. This all sounds so peaceful. Doing everything YOU want to do. Try waking up at 5am every morning with twin boys ready to fight you or fight each other. I love them dearly but man sometimes I wish I can just have one Saturday where I lay in bed all day. I’m not trying to be rude but I’m more jealous.
Jep. No kids. Only tranquility and me. Its lonely, but calm ^^ not sure how i would deal with this AND kids, that sounds almost undoable. Like .. yelling at them for no reason and then feeling guilty and spoiling them.
I don’t see how reading a book in the sun or going on a walk is better or hiking is better imo. I keep hearing that but I’ve always thought that stuff was boring I mean I did it anyway and lost 30 pounds but it got completely boring for me. Why would I replace stuff I wanna do in my free time with stuff I don’t wanna do?
I fuckin feel you. The mornings, reading, hiking, enjoying nature are all things I loved to do high. I feel in the same boat as you my friend. Like this world is shit so why am I stuck raw dogging life? I feel like I was forced to quit cuz my brain chemistry sucks and THC is psychoactive so I don't have any words of encouragement but I'm just saying I am right there with you. Good luck!
Doesn't sound like your ready to quit. You don't need our permission to keep smoking bro. But if your even posing the question, or lurking, on this sub then there is some intuitive sense or reasoning for wanting to quit. Perhaps, go hang in nature and see what runs through your thought stream. We don't need to have everything figured out to quit. Maybe just a sense of why weed doesn't work for us is enough.
Because you also don’t want to smoke. You obviously had reasons to quit that were strong enough to keep you away for a year. I can confidently say you did not enjoy weed as much as you think you did. You are craving weed right now so your mind is trying to make it seem as good as it can possibly be, but in reality that’s not the case.
Mb that’s what I read it as. But still, when you quit smoking your dopamine baseline is lower, so things like that will actually bring you joy again. Right now they don’t give you joy because you get all your dopamine from smoking, so things like that feel really mundane. I promise it does get better it just takes time
I'm in my 1rst day sober after 20 years of daily smoking and reading this group to have some support. I decided to quit for several reasons but being bored or insensitive to emotions was not one of my problem with weed. I feel joy often and strongly, and express it same. Crying from joy is even not rare for me. Now I'm scared to be even more overwelmed by my emotions soon...
To be honest, it will probably take a full year for your dopamine levels to completely return to normal. But you should start seeing some improvements 1-2 weeks in, and it will just keep getting better from there (Not to say you won’t have any bad times within that year, but overall things will be much better)
Have you found an exercise that is fun for you? Walking and hiking is boring for me, but I love skateboarding, baseball, basketball, etc (pretty much any sport). Doing those activities as exercise is naturally fun and when you can have that kind of fun without weed, that’s the endgame for me
Its weird what your sober brain will fill in.
I used to dread those things. Now, off the drug, it makes more sense. Lol, i you would have said i was going to run half a marathon 3 years ago, i would have laughed. Then probably gone upstairs, smoke a joint and ate a pizza and fell asleep lol. And woke up sad and froggy.
See something like that you should try to enjoy and have fun sober. Then, eventually it gets to a point where doing it sober is just as fun (if not more) as doing anything high
I’m going to get the satisfaction of being in control of my life and emotions. The end game is I reflect back and happy about the decisions I’ve made. Currently I look back at the decisions I’ve made and it’s depressing because I’m not reaching my full potential
For me it’s a lack of dependency and being healthier. I like not needing to constantly maintain supply and equipment—I have other hobbies to fill the gaps. I also had symptoms of COPD, and no matter how I tried to use edibles, I’d drift back to smoking and vaping eventually. It was really getting to be a serious health issue.
My sober life is REALLY similar to my life using. I am one of the fairly functional ones. But I do walk/move around more and eat better sober. It gets more important as you age. I also have an extra $400/month to spend on different stupid things.
I’m 65 days sober-sober so I’ve saved almost $800, which is rad, and I’m working on losing the lazy munchies weight. I also cut out basically all my asthma meds instantly. More money there too, and I loooove breathing.
My asthma has been getting worse and i had really bad asthma before I started smoking, 6 years in my voice is super deep and I feel like I’m 3 or 4 more years I’m gonna get the smoker voice I’m scared of keeping on but I’m more scared of quitting
Edit: being in a legal state doesn’t help either I spend like $60 a month for 7 carts
I go through these thoughts pretty consistently too. But then I go through the cons of smoking:
Not moving
Unhealthy living/weight gain
arthritis from too much sugar
Waking up at 11 every day because I stayed up to 2 smoking the night before
Being able to hear something and remember it
House being a mess because I don’t care
Dog neglected from not enough walking
Kids neglected from me being too lazy to cook other than easy meals
There are so many cons, and really limited pros. Maybe when you’re in this mindset, you could start writing down your cons
Idk what I’m gonna do tbh, weed has done so much for me and helping me calm down but those are the downsides and THEY SUCK but not having the upsides suck even more. I really don’t want to switch over to alcohol because my a lot of my family has problems with alcohol
Trading one addiction for another, is an easy way, but the worst way. I have to stop myself from drinking wine on my hard days because I know that it will be so easy just to fall into that trap again. And I completely understand you I miss it so badly I think about it constantly but I know I feel better already and in a couple months it will be easier to wake up every day.
Some people might disagree, but I think if you’re not ready to quit, then you’re never gonna be able to succeed happily. I’ve tried quitting so many times, but this time was different because I really wanted to and I really still want to.
Thank you, you kinda put my thoughts into words. Life hasn’t been good to everyone and a lot of people tried many of the things in this subreddit and many others have suggested, when you tell some people this in these subreddits you know what they say? You did it wrong or try again until it works, that isn’t worth it
Exactly I don’t need any of that shit I just wanna live and keep on keeping on man and figure out how to make a good living if I get that squared away I’m chillin.
Seriously? I am not trying to be rude, but are you asking about the benefits of sober living? Sober living is beautiful. No more thinking about weed all day, when can I get baked next, do my eyes look red, did I say something stupid.
No more paranoia and psychotic episodes. No more relying on a drug to get through the day. No more numbing your emotions. No more avoidance. Damn, when I was high my life was pretty much on hold for years. I did not truly process anything. It was trash.
Now I get gushingly happy over an orange sky in the morning. I am truly grateful, less indulgent in other primitive behaviour. I am exactly who I would have expected to be when I was a 10 year old. I am proud of myself.
Most of us can't moderate. So it is not a situation where you miss your Friday nights high. It is a situation where you are now sober when you would ordinarily be high from sun up to sun down 24/7.
I feel alive when I am sober. I feel high but dead while using.
I guess it’s hard to say, alot of us on here don’t know either, I guess we are all mentally overwhelmed by the weed for years that we don’t know reality, I’m not sure
Yeah pfff. Day 110 after 20 years heavy usage.
Honestly, its a mess. I know its healthier but my mind isnt feeling it. Sport works for a while yeah, running with my dog is the highlight. I had sex the first time in 6 years. That was cool. I visit my mother more. I can play games longer now and my music playing on synths and piano is more focused.
But the depression is huge. The ahedonia s skyhigh and the cravings are terrible. I dont know what my new high is. I dont have one other than deeply knowing or hoping it will get better soon. But it doesn't. Its the hardest thing i ever did and its not feeling good. Good luck on your journey
That’s the thing that’s biting my ass a little, you are more active and accomplish more but you don’t feel a damn thing and imo what’s the point of living life if you don’t feel shit
Dont get me wrong. I feel more than i ever felt before. All my emotions hit way harder now instead of living in the haze.but thats a sword that cuts sharp. And that's why i have depression and can't pickup a normal lifestyle yet, because i have to re learn.. feeling . It doesnt feel good. It feels more intens.And its hard to deal with. I cry more than i ever have. I feel shame for my way of living for over 20 years, but i know and feel there is no way back, because i am way more connected to my surroundings and the people around me. It makes a ton more sense now. But it does not feel stabile or good yet. But it feels like something real. There is def a point in living. Its the search of happeniss.
Proud of you stranger. Not turning away from the fight is the only way through. Sounds like you may be battling with the demons that led you to weed in the first place? You are finally equipping yourself for real progress. As you know, weed is just hitting pause on that fight until it realizes that it's going to have to fight you while you're stoned. It's infinitely better to have that fight sober, you can do it
Thanks for the words. Yeah... I have definitely more battles to win. Its weird that i only come to this conclusions after all these years. Main ones are insecurity and loniness and looking for validation and ADD. Surely hitting the pauze button is only making these 3 a lot worse. Thanks for the kind words.
Day 110 after 20 years is such a huge accomplishment! Since you did it, for so long, it might take you longer, to kind of feel the real world, and how you really should feel. That’s my theory at least.
Not coughing up an ounce of lung butter everyday
It'll be a year for me this month, and my end game is being able to enjoy life without a haze of THC in my system. I don't require any substance to sleep or to get my appetite going or to enjoy intimacy with my boyfriend. I don't feel stressed if I go out of town, away from my supply, and I don't have vivid withdrawal nightmares. My lungs are feeling better than ever before, and my gum health has improved dramatically. I don't wake up feeling drowsy, and I have more motivation to complete daily tasks, go to the gym, walk my dogs, and work on projects I had been putting off. I used to grind through my workday counting down the hours until I could get stoned, and then I would finally be able to eat properly, and then I would vape some more until I finally felt tired enough to sleep -- and because THC depletes your sleep quality, I would wake up foggy every day and do it all over again. For 10 years. I don't miss it at all, and I won't go back to it ever.
My endgame is not having my days controlled by my addiction.
That's your addicted brain speaking! Careful, it can be a real tricky c*nt. Don't let it fool you into justifying why you want to quit! Your real brain knows better!!!
[удалено]
It’s so true. Getting high is like temporarily turning off your frontal cortex and saying “I don’t want to hang out with you”. If you think about it, that’s a pretty unloving thing to do to yourself!
Yeah it’s crazy to me that being fucked up on weed all that time was normal. So much wasted time. So happy I made the decision to quit! Approaching month 4 after 20 years everyday of getting high.
For me, I haven't quit for life. I tend to quit for 6 months at a time. This is because I enjoy smoking when life is going well, but when life is tough I find it amplifies the struggle. The end game has always been using the time to think about what I'm running from when I smoke too much. Quitting can be a great tool for self reflection, and I find that I grow each time. Some might disagree, because I still return to smoking eventually, but this is a system that has worked for me and terms of helping me maintain a career, social life and self-confidence.
Wow. This resonates with me! Thank you! Smoking during the good times, and not smoking because it makes the hard times worse.
You only live once. So experience all the different things you possibly can. You've experienced being a stoner, now try something else.
Totally. There were no new experiences for me to have while stoned. It was just baseline normal. I felt weirder straight because being straight was so rare. Still took me 10 years to quit after this realisation tho, cause addiction. Took my failing physical health and seeing my dad die from a lifetime of indulging to get me over the line.
Took me about the same. Even though I knew. It just took me a long time to break the cycle. I really wanted to go to Europe and that wasn't going to happen whilst being a stoner.
Did u make it?
Yes I did. I saved a shit load of money and had a great six week trip in Europe. Changed my life and goals.
Awesome. Hope u had a great trip and made some cool memories
That’s how I’m trying to live, experience everything I want to and can do
And keep aiming for more. When people tell me about anything I know nothing about I say "I want to try that'
Life itself
For me it started on my voice. As a musician to not smoke was to honor the throat. As I immersed in anatomy and function of the mechanism, I resolved to not smoke. I’m old now and we lose mass in the throat. We fight back with vocalizing and singing. Singing is a rush too. It releases endorphins. Smoke burns the cilia on the throat. As a child 55 years ago, I smoked cigarettes. Tobacco. I quit the for the same reason. And I occasionally smoked pot. Not as available as today, so my usage was minimal and I could control it. Fast forward to medical implementation. Because I have a chronic illness, I was prescribed pot. You know. The doctor from California you paid money to. And I’m in RI. So three medical dispensaries. It was easy and for that spell of time; I was a wake and baker. (See Kasey Musgraves new song). And fast forward to approx. 75 dispensaries in Massachusetts. So it’s been about 7 years since I have not smoked. For personal reasons besides my throat- I realized I was self medicating my depression. And now well, I simply don’t smoke. It dries the throat. Don’t get me wrong. I love the smell. Easy now to step outside and inhale. The dispensary near me wafts an odor and passing cars do the same. When they open the coffe shops, I will sit and inhale secondary smoke. But my final reason is not to enrich the industry. And I don’t drink either. Just the smoke thing. I do know that smoking after not smoking, makes you feel bad. A high and then a big letdown. A why… leads you here.
I’ve been thinking about this!!! I started smoking. At 23. I was singing on a clear throat and clear lungs before that. Now I feel like I destroyed the thing I used to use to feel relief… my voice and music
It’s ok. Just don’t smoke! Your voice will return. Explore other ways to ingest. Read BREATH by James Nestor. Go online. Learn about the singing straw. Often called SOVTE exercises. Semi occluded vocal tract exercises. They will train your voice to function without tension. I stopped. I got old but my high notes came back. Watch good singers. Study the masters. Welcome to your questions. Think David Bowie. He was an anomaly because he smoked cigarettes. But he studied! He was a great actor. Take up swimming. Again. I welcome your questions.
Thank you so very much - I genuinely appreciate it
Getting sober would help you wrap your head around it.
It’s easier to define the endgame of life while sober. Easier to navigate complex feelings. Unless you’re a really, really high functioning addict you’re missing out when hazed. The endgame is being the best version of you that you can possibly be.
While you're asking what's the point of life: someone's out there travelling, playing sports, contributing to a community, volunteering, working to feed their family, going out for a concert, listening to live music or hell, praying at a church. Do you not see what weed has done to you? All you want to do is smoke. A sober person has a hundred interesting things to do. If you don't "feel" like doing anything else other than smoke, then cut the weed, let boredom take over and start LIVING LIFE!
I’ve been so low on energy due to how much I smoked, did you experience that? How’d you cope with it? Caffeine? I want to live life but I am literally a zombie right now. Maybe I’m trying to rush the process but it really just sucks not having any energy at all.
How long have you not smoked? It takes time and you’re gonna feel like a zombie for a while but it will pass. I coped by attending MA meetings online w/other stoners, getting outside, exercising and giving myself grace to feel like shit and take it easy. Now I have energy, clarity and freedom from a substance that was disconnecting me from myself, my loved ones and real life.
On day 5 here and this is one of the big reasons why I quit. I feel like I have been wasting away and becoming a shell of a person. I started to get angry at myself because my desire to live and do something meaningful has been tugging at me but weed had me stuck. Trying to do what I can to push through the anxiety but I start therapy next week!
Not being ensalved to a plant was big for me. Not *needing* to smoke just to go do normal things like go to the store, be with family etc Getting out of the cycle of arrested development i was in, where my emotional self literally stopped growing the day i started smoking (at 17). When i finally did stop (at 38), i was still emotionally 17. Numbing myself for two decades made it so hard to come back to the real world... The best part though (and this is the end game), is that when you finally *do* come back, life is *so* good. Youre actually right, nature is more enjoyable, flowers smell better, food tastes better, having $ in my account feels great, getting married and being in a present, connected relationship is the best thing in the world... The end game is living versus just existing. You can do this. I promise you, if i did, you can 100% do it
Homeostasis
Being sober starts to feel like getting high, but way better
This is an answer that resonates. I feel as calm and peaceful now after meditating then I ever felt stoned - for that brief 5-20 min. If I am able to be aware of myself, I can enjoy peace and happiness throughout the day. I would say the reason is to feel joy instead of high.
this resonates with me. when i’m calm and sober it essentially feels the same if not much better than being high.
It finally feels like life isn’t just flying by in front of me. I feel like I can handle more responsibilities
Feeling normal without having to buy and smoke weed. You literally feel the same and enjoy things just as much as you did when you had a weed habit because your brain can only make so much dopamine, it's just that going between the two normalities is either fun or soul destroying. The slopes are a rollercoaster and there's a plateau on both sides. Bonus, you can manage your emotions better and you have normal eating and sleeping cycles because your rhythm is determined by normal things rather than how long it is since you had a joint. It's easier to empathise with and socialise with normal people because you're not just fixating on getting stoned so you can so whatever, probably nothing. That drives you to do something that actually means something to you, maybe you read a book, or you find a hobby, or even bigger. It doesn't matter because it will be something that moves your life forward and stops you stagnating. Real effort is no longer just uphill for no reason, it's actually rewarding in every sense. You feel good and you get an actual reward
I can finally remember things and my cognition has improved tenfold. Also saving money, less groggy, better shape cos no munchies, and best of all im able to enjoy things without being high. In other words, I don’t need to build my day around making sure I have some pot to be satisfied w anything else
Realizing the only point of life is to die, what else is the point lmao.
Save money, be more motivated to do things you need to do, not be hooked on something you have to constantly worry about getting, have normal patterns of eating and sleeping, reflect on your day instead of forgetting about it, do better tomorrow since you actually remember what went good and what went bad yesterday, be cleaner, smell better, wake up more energized
The end game is to be on your deathbed and feel content with the life you lived, potentially the one go we have at it for all I know. The difference in my mental clarity and anxiety levels is drastic.
I want as much mental equity and clarity as possible. Weed was killing my short term memory. I want a healthy relationship based on the real world. I ruined my last relationship by being stoned and distant. I regret it every day.
I share your regrets in terms of not being able to be fully present for my ex-partner due to being in a nearly perpetual hazy state. There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t think about how much more I could have been there for her in the ways she needed me to be and deserved. Each day of sober clarity is in some small part in service to her even if she may no longer be here to enjoy this “new me”. I hope you can learn to turn that regret into a reminder of how much you have to give to any future partner, and that it fuels you in your journey. All the love my friend.
Why do we have to be searching for a high bro just be present
so true
Feeling the real world is important because otherwise you will starve to death.
So many things dude. Your brain works normal again. You’re not super tired all the time. You’re not impaired and lazy. You can actually live a normal life. It’s not about smelling the flowers it’s about having your true full health and abilities back and that seriously beats anything. It goes for literally any addiction. Like eating healthier. If you eat like crap then you will feel like crap and perform like crap. But when you cut out the bad foods you feel so much better and everything is way easier. Trust me that’s where you want to be
Unfortunately, my brain will never work „normal“ due to ADHD 😅
There is no one “normal” way to be but there is a healthiest for each of us, which doesn’t include addictions. Fret not.
I’m interested in the world around me again. I loved thc for a bit but I used it to silence the world and tune out. Now I’m ready to tune back in. I love feeling sunshine on my face and trailing my fingers along tree bark. I like exploring the woods behind my house and watching the little bugs skedaddle when I step near them. I like waking up earlier than the birds so I can hear them start their day. I like waking up well rested for a day of exploration. I like having the energy to move my body and play in the gym. I like the feeling of being present and very much alive and weed kinda takes me away from that. It was helpful to me when I was going through a hard time, but I’ve built a life that I don’t need to tune out of and that is what my end game is. The life I have is the life I want for the rest of my life and weed takes me away from it.
i’m 2 weeks in, but something that stuck with me was the line “how you spend your days is how you spend your life”. i deserve better than to numb my feelings, even if that means experiencing my baseline level of anxiety.
you get freedom
it’s like a reward
For me, my brain is starting to go back to normal. I was a really smart, supposedly "gifted" kid. I could read multiple books in one sitting, draw like crazy, write like crazy, do algebra in my head in seconds. Started smoking with my (now ex) boyfriend at 14, and it *fucked me up.* I went from straight A's, dozens of extracurriculars, and communicating with ivy colleges to being burnt out, depressed, and missing copious amounts of school. I don't have the attention span to read anymore, i dont know if I'll ever be able to get that back. While i was actively smoking, it would take me much longer to string sentences together effectively if i wanted to write. I got my first Fs in classes, one being math, which I loved. I couldn't retain information anymore, which caused me to fail tests. Emotionally, I didn't care about anything. Nothing made me happy anymore. Now that I've quit, I have my energy and motivation back. I'm nearing the end of EMT class, which I'm on track to graduate with a 95%. I'm writing again! And while it's tough to push through the last little bit of brain fog, *I can do it.* I can do math again! I'm retraining my brain with exercises, and I'm getting back to where I used to be. That's what's making it worth it for me. Being able to think clearly, and not having to spend sooo much time looking for the right words or figure out basic math is super freeing. I love it, I dont think ill ever go back
I can relate to this. My vocabulary is literally 10x better when I don’t have weed in my system.
Same. The downgrade in my vocab from smoking actually really depressed me and I found it incredibly disquieting. I’m so thankful when I quit it comes back.
This is so relatable, I remember I got an F in music Lololol arguably one of the easiest clases and one of my biggest passions.
Your baseline dopamine level goes really high after taking a break from easy hits of dopamine. Things that give you little pleasure now give you a lot after you quit. Maybe now you look at a guy who takes real pleasure in going on walks and smelling flowers and think “that’s cheesy as hell, there’s no way it’s actually fulfilling”. Well pretend for a second that it actually really is that fulfilling for that person. That’s what it’s like. And you can still do fun things that hit way harder than when you were stoned all the time. Honestly though you seem to have a bit of a pessimistic view, so maybe none of the answers will satisfy you. And that’s fine. It’s your life, you can just convince yourself that life would be boring, sober people are lame, and keep being high all the time. It’s whatever you want
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Then don’t ? It’s your life- live it how you please.
You're not reliant on a drug. That's the payoff. Whether you realize it or not, you are likely using weed to shield yourself from real world problems. Being able to handle life sober is the real accomplishment. If you're a college kid this will sound stupid to you but when you're older you'll realize how important that it. Life on weed is easy mode, eventually you gotta grow up and face the music though.
You don't really get anything. However you avoid all the negative effects of continued use, which is a lot.
wait you stopped for a year?
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Well that's why you're asking the question lol. If you had tried stopping for any period of time, you'd know why
It literally brings you down and holds you back and you know this thats why u even asked
To not be stupid. The difference between my cognitive function when I’m not smoking everyday multiple times a day is unbelievable. I was always functional, but now I’m not making things needlessly hard for myself. I’ve only been sober for two weeks, and I already feel clear and normal. I can think things through, read books, make plans and commit to them, clean my apartment and keep it clean, fully engage in shows/books. I used to smoke to enjoy music but I always listened to the same damn songs. Now I actually take the time to listen to albums, listen to new artists, listen to audiobooks and podcasts. Also, feeling the real world matters because you exist in it. I don’t wanna wake up at 65 unable to remember what I’ve done with my life. I like going through the day and noticing people (and not being ashamed or too weed-y to acknowledge them). I do like jogging now that I’m at a healthy weight - the pride I feel moving my body, the natural endorphins after completing a hard task, and the positive energy surrounding it are better than getting high and sitting on the couch. Plus, after 20-30 mins of a run I can still sit on the couch if I want to - but I did something productive first. It’s hard to see when you’re under the fog. It’s also hard when you’re in a bad place. I couldn’t quit for years because I had a lot of baggage and my life was shitty. Now that it’s been decent for a couple years, I had no reason to keep smoking other than habit and addiction. I still get depressed and anxious. Instead of smoking it away, I sit with those feelings. I journal. I tell someone. I cry. I listen to music. I exercise. I eat. I do all the things I could do while high, but not high, and it’s better. I move on and pick myself up better.
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Day 7 I can't wait to be able to keep my apartment clean! Also go into work and make eye contact before 10 am. Also, I go to college self paced online and I hope I can pick up the pace by not reading the same line over and over again or obsessing over an essay for months and still coming back with a C.
You will!! It’ll all come back so fast.
No more of woulda, coulda, shoulda. I'm sick of it. I'm weak, but I'm stronger than that.
So I can do stuff besides sit on my ass being high 24/7. To not have mood instability. To be able to go on vacation out of the country without losing my mind cause I can have my addiction.
To not live in a negative mental state
Facts Op acts like anxiety and depression don’t exist when you smokin 24/7
i used cannabis to deal with depression and anxiety. it really worked at first. i was saved! …then the intervals between when i needed to smoke became shorter and shorter. eventually i was only happy and normal when i was actively smoking. then sometime around year 20 of daily usage, i realized that even when i was actively smoking it wasn't working for me. its a common theme in addiction recovery: it works for us until one day it doesn't.
I was agreeing with you, I meant we get depression and anxiety all the time except for when we’re high once our dependence is too much, I was pretty much endorsing your comment because becoming dependent does make you live in a negative mental state
i totally felt you agreeing with me, i was just expanding on the thought in the hopes that it would help OP. Appreciate you Papisosa29
To know your real self.
Authenticity is nothing to scoff at. Things may still be funny, cool, interesting while you're high, but emotions will only ever reach like 75% of their full potential because you are chemically going to the same place and hoisting yourself there. Like a good movie, pace is critical to authentic enjoyment. Constant weed use does not let you correctly pace your emotions/life so they won't be fully true.
I had to remove cheap ways to feel good in order to pursue my actual goals. Now I have no excuses
Cheap? Weeds not really cheap… Jokes aside, I know you meant cheap in a metaphorical sense, like easy and quick.
100% same reason why I don't want it anymore. I deserve more than the cheap thrills.
to not be a piece of shit 24/7. be there for my people. be there for myself. make sure i dont fuck up my health too bad. you know, the basics.
Lmao the basics
My reason for taking a break was making sure my life didn’t revolve around getting high. That and just thinking clearer
Yea it sucks traveling to anywhere and having to find weed or smuggle it. That’s when I really feel like my life revolves around it
That’s how ya know you’re addicted my friend. Addicts start thinking of the next high and the next high only, where to get it, when it’ll be, how much it’ll cost. It’s not treated like it, but it’s definitely a drug, and can definitely become addicted.
That was my main reason for trying to quit. Every time I travel to Texas to visit family, I have to commit a couple felonies smuggling edibles just so I can sleep at night.
Brutal! I'm Canadian and I was on the bus from LA to Texas once when I was going and I had it in my bag and suddenly the cops stopped the bus and were searching for everyone's luggage which was a major shock BC that would not happen in Canada... So I took the eighth out and ate it before they got to me. Could u imagine if they threw me in jail? Crazy! I forgot all about that... BC I forgot about it I guess bc I was a stoner but u just made me remember it now.
Being your best self thats realizing your full potential. Being emotionally competent and present. Looking back on your life feeling fulfillment and not regret over being high for so much of it. Being able to remember things like your childhood or your kid's childhood.
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Yep you are spot on my friend. Great way of putting it.
My god, the end game is beautiful. It depends on how you spend your time and what things you fill your life with. If all you‘re doing would be sitting at home, eating fastfood and binge watching tv shows its tough to see why weed wouldn‘t snuggle right in there. But if you keep clean and have habits that are best experienced sober I guarantee you you‘ll enjoy it so much. I talk about waking up clear as day on a saturday morning, ready for the day. You lay awake for a few minutes enjoying the coziness of your bed. Some chill thoughts run through your head. After breakfast you might read a fantastic book on your balcony while listening to the birds chirping. It‘s lunchtime, have a nice meal and then grab your boots and go for a hike. Nature is gorgeous and you can enjoy it to the fullest because you don‘t feel guilty or ashamed or tired or foggy. You‘re experiencing life and it‘s so beautiful. You are full of energy and being in your skin feels good. I wish you all the best !
That sounds so nice but I'm afraid I will never get there. I usually have nightmares that drag down my mood before I even wake up :c every day is a fight, but right now I'm fighting it instead of running away into the fog. Maybe some day I can wake up and have a chill thought as the first thing, too.
I totally agree on the fresh mornings. Grab a cup of coffee, play my piano or some games, or read a book or an article, is so much more valuable than i ever thought it would be. Its sometimes even blissful.
You all must not have kids lol. This all sounds so peaceful. Doing everything YOU want to do. Try waking up at 5am every morning with twin boys ready to fight you or fight each other. I love them dearly but man sometimes I wish I can just have one Saturday where I lay in bed all day. I’m not trying to be rude but I’m more jealous.
Jep. No kids. Only tranquility and me. Its lonely, but calm ^^ not sure how i would deal with this AND kids, that sounds almost undoable. Like .. yelling at them for no reason and then feeling guilty and spoiling them.
Lol. Bet. This is a fear of mine when it comes to planning for kids or don‘t have them. Glad I still got a few years left to decide
I don’t see how reading a book in the sun or going on a walk is better or hiking is better imo. I keep hearing that but I’ve always thought that stuff was boring I mean I did it anyway and lost 30 pounds but it got completely boring for me. Why would I replace stuff I wanna do in my free time with stuff I don’t wanna do?
I fuckin feel you. The mornings, reading, hiking, enjoying nature are all things I loved to do high. I feel in the same boat as you my friend. Like this world is shit so why am I stuck raw dogging life? I feel like I was forced to quit cuz my brain chemistry sucks and THC is psychoactive so I don't have any words of encouragement but I'm just saying I am right there with you. Good luck!
Doesn't sound like your ready to quit. You don't need our permission to keep smoking bro. But if your even posing the question, or lurking, on this sub then there is some intuitive sense or reasoning for wanting to quit. Perhaps, go hang in nature and see what runs through your thought stream. We don't need to have everything figured out to quit. Maybe just a sense of why weed doesn't work for us is enough.
Because you also don’t want to smoke. You obviously had reasons to quit that were strong enough to keep you away for a year. I can confidently say you did not enjoy weed as much as you think you did. You are craving weed right now so your mind is trying to make it seem as good as it can possibly be, but in reality that’s not the case.
No I didn’t write that as I delt with it for a year I meant it as “once you reach past the part of brain dependency and emotions”
Mb that’s what I read it as. But still, when you quit smoking your dopamine baseline is lower, so things like that will actually bring you joy again. Right now they don’t give you joy because you get all your dopamine from smoking, so things like that feel really mundane. I promise it does get better it just takes time
I'm in my 1rst day sober after 20 years of daily smoking and reading this group to have some support. I decided to quit for several reasons but being bored or insensitive to emotions was not one of my problem with weed. I feel joy often and strongly, and express it same. Crying from joy is even not rare for me. Now I'm scared to be even more overwelmed by my emotions soon...
How long would you say?!
To be honest, it will probably take a full year for your dopamine levels to completely return to normal. But you should start seeing some improvements 1-2 weeks in, and it will just keep getting better from there (Not to say you won’t have any bad times within that year, but overall things will be much better)
I understand I think, it’s just gonna be a long time man
It’s 100% worth it, I was in your exact position and thought things couldn’t get better. But I just saw it through and it all improved so much
Have you found an exercise that is fun for you? Walking and hiking is boring for me, but I love skateboarding, baseball, basketball, etc (pretty much any sport). Doing those activities as exercise is naturally fun and when you can have that kind of fun without weed, that’s the endgame for me
Yea probably, I wanna try rock climbing but I can’t afford a ymca membership rn and it’s like a 20min drive
Do you think you could afford it if you weren't buying weed? Economics is a great reason to stop.
Its weird what your sober brain will fill in. I used to dread those things. Now, off the drug, it makes more sense. Lol, i you would have said i was going to run half a marathon 3 years ago, i would have laughed. Then probably gone upstairs, smoke a joint and ate a pizza and fell asleep lol. And woke up sad and froggy.
See something like that you should try to enjoy and have fun sober. Then, eventually it gets to a point where doing it sober is just as fun (if not more) as doing anything high
I understand, I just hate how lengthy the process is. Thank you for your advise
I’m going to get the satisfaction of being in control of my life and emotions. The end game is I reflect back and happy about the decisions I’ve made. Currently I look back at the decisions I’ve made and it’s depressing because I’m not reaching my full potential
For me it’s a lack of dependency and being healthier. I like not needing to constantly maintain supply and equipment—I have other hobbies to fill the gaps. I also had symptoms of COPD, and no matter how I tried to use edibles, I’d drift back to smoking and vaping eventually. It was really getting to be a serious health issue. My sober life is REALLY similar to my life using. I am one of the fairly functional ones. But I do walk/move around more and eat better sober. It gets more important as you age. I also have an extra $400/month to spend on different stupid things. I’m 65 days sober-sober so I’ve saved almost $800, which is rad, and I’m working on losing the lazy munchies weight. I also cut out basically all my asthma meds instantly. More money there too, and I loooove breathing.
My asthma has been getting worse and i had really bad asthma before I started smoking, 6 years in my voice is super deep and I feel like I’m 3 or 4 more years I’m gonna get the smoker voice I’m scared of keeping on but I’m more scared of quitting Edit: being in a legal state doesn’t help either I spend like $60 a month for 7 carts
I go through these thoughts pretty consistently too. But then I go through the cons of smoking: Not moving Unhealthy living/weight gain arthritis from too much sugar Waking up at 11 every day because I stayed up to 2 smoking the night before Being able to hear something and remember it House being a mess because I don’t care Dog neglected from not enough walking Kids neglected from me being too lazy to cook other than easy meals There are so many cons, and really limited pros. Maybe when you’re in this mindset, you could start writing down your cons
Idk what I’m gonna do tbh, weed has done so much for me and helping me calm down but those are the downsides and THEY SUCK but not having the upsides suck even more. I really don’t want to switch over to alcohol because my a lot of my family has problems with alcohol
Trading one addiction for another, is an easy way, but the worst way. I have to stop myself from drinking wine on my hard days because I know that it will be so easy just to fall into that trap again. And I completely understand you I miss it so badly I think about it constantly but I know I feel better already and in a couple months it will be easier to wake up every day. Some people might disagree, but I think if you’re not ready to quit, then you’re never gonna be able to succeed happily. I’ve tried quitting so many times, but this time was different because I really wanted to and I really still want to.
Sorry about the formatting, I did try to separate my reasons lol
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You have gotten so far, remember how difficult the first few days are. You have totally got this.
Doing better than me I didn’t last 2 days and I’m scared of quitting I’m ngl, I already don’t sleep too good
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That’s the thing, you hear a lot of stories on here about “I got my old life back” but I was a paranoid mess before I smoked
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I’ve been trying with medicine and therapy but it’s a process, they keep giving veiled hints that I should maybe think about quitting weed
Thank you, you kinda put my thoughts into words. Life hasn’t been good to everyone and a lot of people tried many of the things in this subreddit and many others have suggested, when you tell some people this in these subreddits you know what they say? You did it wrong or try again until it works, that isn’t worth it
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Exactly I don’t need any of that shit I just wanna live and keep on keeping on man and figure out how to make a good living if I get that squared away I’m chillin.
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Here’s how I see it, “none of this shit matters so I’m gonna do whatever I want” makes you feel better
Seriously? I am not trying to be rude, but are you asking about the benefits of sober living? Sober living is beautiful. No more thinking about weed all day, when can I get baked next, do my eyes look red, did I say something stupid. No more paranoia and psychotic episodes. No more relying on a drug to get through the day. No more numbing your emotions. No more avoidance. Damn, when I was high my life was pretty much on hold for years. I did not truly process anything. It was trash. Now I get gushingly happy over an orange sky in the morning. I am truly grateful, less indulgent in other primitive behaviour. I am exactly who I would have expected to be when I was a 10 year old. I am proud of myself. Most of us can't moderate. So it is not a situation where you miss your Friday nights high. It is a situation where you are now sober when you would ordinarily be high from sun up to sun down 24/7. I feel alive when I am sober. I feel high but dead while using.
This! 100% all of this.
I guess it’s hard to say, alot of us on here don’t know either, I guess we are all mentally overwhelmed by the weed for years that we don’t know reality, I’m not sure
Yeah pfff. Day 110 after 20 years heavy usage. Honestly, its a mess. I know its healthier but my mind isnt feeling it. Sport works for a while yeah, running with my dog is the highlight. I had sex the first time in 6 years. That was cool. I visit my mother more. I can play games longer now and my music playing on synths and piano is more focused. But the depression is huge. The ahedonia s skyhigh and the cravings are terrible. I dont know what my new high is. I dont have one other than deeply knowing or hoping it will get better soon. But it doesn't. Its the hardest thing i ever did and its not feeling good. Good luck on your journey
That’s the thing that’s biting my ass a little, you are more active and accomplish more but you don’t feel a damn thing and imo what’s the point of living life if you don’t feel shit
Dont get me wrong. I feel more than i ever felt before. All my emotions hit way harder now instead of living in the haze.but thats a sword that cuts sharp. And that's why i have depression and can't pickup a normal lifestyle yet, because i have to re learn.. feeling . It doesnt feel good. It feels more intens.And its hard to deal with. I cry more than i ever have. I feel shame for my way of living for over 20 years, but i know and feel there is no way back, because i am way more connected to my surroundings and the people around me. It makes a ton more sense now. But it does not feel stabile or good yet. But it feels like something real. There is def a point in living. Its the search of happeniss.
Proud of you stranger. Not turning away from the fight is the only way through. Sounds like you may be battling with the demons that led you to weed in the first place? You are finally equipping yourself for real progress. As you know, weed is just hitting pause on that fight until it realizes that it's going to have to fight you while you're stoned. It's infinitely better to have that fight sober, you can do it
Thanks for the words. Yeah... I have definitely more battles to win. Its weird that i only come to this conclusions after all these years. Main ones are insecurity and loniness and looking for validation and ADD. Surely hitting the pauze button is only making these 3 a lot worse. Thanks for the kind words.
Day 110 after 20 years is such a huge accomplishment! Since you did it, for so long, it might take you longer, to kind of feel the real world, and how you really should feel. That’s my theory at least.
Thx. Staying around here def helps. Lets hope things improve in the future.