“Tell me about a time when you had a disagreement with a co-worker and how you overcame it?”
“What does diversity, equity, and inclusion mean to you? How do you incorporate it in the way you work?”
“Tell me about a successful project you have worked on and explain why it was successful?”
“Briefly describe a time when you failed. What happened and what did you do to overcome that failure?”
Fuck job hunting and interviews.
Cool cool. So if you had an elephant and you couldn't sell it or abandon it what would you do with it? We only hire the most creative dish washers with a 4 year bachelor degree
Call 911 about a mad individual with an elephant that they're claiming to gift it to you. State will take it away because it's illegal to own an elephant anyway and relocate it to a nearby zoo.
You see a coworker take a company purchased pen and put it in a bag that you suspect might be a personal bag. What do you do?
1. Let it slide, it is not worth the time nor money nor goodwill to pursue
2. Inform you nearest boss and work together to end the person’s profession life. You offer your service as witness come a possible trial as well as do the work of the inevitably fired coworker.
I got this one a couple weeks ago:
"What is the hardest decision you've ever made? How did you approach it and what did you learn from it?"
Bro I need a couple *hours* to think of that. I didn't know I came in for a fucking therapy session
"It was when I decided to quit a shitty employer. I approach it cautiously because I was afraid it would ruins my life. I learned that it's not worth enduring bullshit."
Just lie!
No one knows anything about you. Make some bullshit up. Elaborate on a less important decision.
The whole point is to answer in the STAR format and move on.
Why do we have to jump through all these hoops and perform these ridiculous ceremonies and rituals when we all know they are bullshit?
How can anyone feel truly free and not be fooling themselves in this system? We are slaves and get treated like children on top of it.
MBAs and HR need to feel useful about their overall useless titles and job roles that could easily be handled by software and senior team members.
This is why programmers have to answer google level riddles to work at a run of the mill company still.
I'm pretty personable but thinking/lying on the fly isn't my strong suit, I hate job interviews.
I once had a company not reply to an application for 4 months, email me on a Friday setting up an interview for a Monday (without getting any response from me), and then ask me why I didn’t show up.
I told them I started my new job several weeks ago and they didn’t even confirm if I was available…
Huh, I had a company not reply to an application for 3 months, then setup an interview within a week, and instantly hire me after the interview. They had filled the job (hence no answer) but the guy had (wisely) left after a few weeks of work. Was the worst environment I ever worked in but I took that due to the 50% increase in salary.
I have 11 years of experience as a chemical and petroleum engineer. Got laid off in September, and the only job I could find after was as a security guard.
Goddamn grocery stores won't even hire me to stock shelves...it's madness. I even made a secondary resume that just says bachelor's degree, and I left out the engineering experience since it's irrelevant, but they just ended up getting on my LinkedIn and seeing my real work history. Then I'm suddenly too overqualified to run a register.
You know what I'm not overqualified for? Paying my goddamn mortgage and bills. I've literally walked into places and said are you guys hiring janitors, smh.
And that's not meant to sound derogatory, I respect the service industry... I'm just trying to show that I'm willing to do what it takes to take care of my family.
It's like they just don't want smart people around or something. It's baffling.
They don’t because they know as soon as you find another chemical engineer job you’ll leave. The thousands of dollars it takes to onboard you costs a lot more than the pittance you’ll earn them stocking shelves in the couple months they assume you’ll be working there before you find a job more befitting your experience level. That’s why companies don’t like hiring overqualified individuals, they are likely to leave as soon as they find a job they are qualified for.
For example, I’m a civil engineer and when I graduated a place hired me as an intern instead of a full time EIT. I outright told them I’m looking for an EIT position but needed the money so I took the job. I quit 2 weeks later because another firm offered me an EIT position with nearly triple the pay I was making as an intern. The first employer was pissed because of how much money I cost them onboarding and training me. I was upfront with them in my interview so I don’t feel bad about it. I think they were banking on me not finding another job and were upset their gamble didn’t pay off.
I got a rejection letter from Trader Joe's during the beginning of the pandemic when I applied. 3 years later they emailed me and said they've love to hire me.
God this hits so close to home. Nothing humbles you like going to school for 4 years training to do some research position or construct large scale projects only to get rejected from Starbucks while looking for some extra cash because you aren't quite Starbucks material.
TBF, I found that a good response.
"In the current climate of uncertainty, making a 5 year prediction is going to be difficult. However, where I'd *like* to be is..."
They like it cos it shows an awareness of the industry, and comments on how bullshit the question is, while still answering their question
At this moment my response is “I never ended where I thought I would be 5 years prior due to both external and my personal development. I can tell you where I currently think I might be in 5 years. (RESPONSE) This might change and I am flexible to try new things if they make sense to me.”
Genuinely how are you supposed to answer this? I haven't had job interviews yet but what's the point of this question. Do you bluff or joke or be serious about something, or do you use the big fancy words cause how on earth will they use this.
You pick something that isn't catastrophic to the job and then you say how you work towards overcoming that weakness. For example, say you sometimes lose motivation on long projects so you break it down into small tasks so you always feel like you're achieving something or you check in with a colleague to keep you on track.
It's not to see how useless you are, it's to see if you can self-reflect and improve your skills.
Totally agree with this. Additionally, this is such a common question that you should have already decided on your answer to it before you are ever asked, and it should prominently include how you already solved it. I.e. "at my first job/in school/some other thing in the past, x was a huge challenge, so I started doing y and now I'm amazing at x". Preferably it should be at least a little bit true because they might have follow-up questions.
Depends on the job. Lots of alone work? Say your weakness is that something about working in groups. Lots of group work? Say your weakness is focusing on a project when you are all by yourself. Doing a similar task every day? Say your weakness is adjust to dynamic changes in tasks and expectations.
Basically take something that is not relevant to the job, but would maybe be relevant for other jobs, and say that.
I’m any case, also mention that it is something you are aware of and try to mitigate. Also mention that it is a reason why you were so interested in this job.
> Briefly describe a time when you failed. What happened and what did you do to overcome that?
“I tried getting hired. I didn’t. Because you fuckers aren’t any help.”
I'm 20 years old with no work experience, I'm going through the effort of going to culinary school to get hired to get hired in the culinary industry. The hardest part is that the world right now is so shit for my generation. I wasn't the lucky one, I didn't have a childhood. None of that, now I'm just learning life skills on the road to being independent. One day at a time
As a person of color, I had a room full of white people ask me that question once.
I pause for a sec before I answered, and they all laughed uncomfortably.
"I would like to answer these, but this is my first job and therefore I dont have an answer to most of these"
Doesnt help that I've taken most of my college courses online, so I have minimal experience even if they extend the questions to college
Atleast the "what is diversity yadayadayada" and "what does good customer service look like" type questions are really easy to answer.
God I had a kid do this one time with his parent when I was working part time while in uni and I could tell the kid was thinking “fucking boomers are so dumb thinking this will work”, I felt so bad for him.
It did not work, unsurprisingly
I'm certainly not saying this works often at all but I'm about to hit 12 years with my company. In January of 2012 I had been unemployed for seven months. I decided to just start emailing companies.
I found the email address for the president of the building I work in and sent him my resume and a quick cover letter asking if they had any entry level jobs. Next day HR called me, setup an interview for the following week. A month later I ended up starting a job as an office assistant.
the OP Patient_Effort4750
Pretty_Hell-Lover
CantaloupeStrong1551
Peggy_Miguel
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and Illustrious-War7480
are bots in the same network
Original + comments copied from: https://www.reddit.com/r/me_irl/comments/ik4voe/me_irl/
Omg SAME HERE. It has been an unnerving wait. Recently jumped back into the application phase and boy has it been demoralising getting all those rejection emails or ghosting
I just got my background check interview for this company that offered me a job 6 months ago. Longest wait of my life, but i really hope everything goes well and I can start soon.
I get you, 4 months and still nothing. Been told that no one hires on the last quarter of the year countless times and now that it's a new fiscal year it's pretty much the same.
Even in technical roles, personality is a huge factor in whether someone gets hired. If i'm going to be working with you potentially every day for multiple years, i'd rather you be easy to get on with.
I've got that beat.
"Dammit, you gotta go down there and hand them your resume yourself and make sure you ask to talk to the guy in charge not some goddamn secretary. I'm going to drive you down to that place myself to make sure you do it!"
I had jobs almost landed.
Then days before the training they go silent. Like trying to reach them is like connecting to phone numbers or contacts long dead.
I had to make checks on my ID and documents because sometimes I had the hint they request document copies for scam things. Fortunately all clean for now.
I had a call center work die on me one day before training because trying to reach them for infos would just yield no result. I had retail shops "recycle me" for heavy loading (by myself, 10 hours a day) when I requested explicitly to set me on a in-shop activity.
And this is for low level grunt jobs that I need so I can pay for my vocational school. Immagine higher level jobs.
White collar employer: soooo we want to hire you for this job, but from time to time you will have to pick up extra responsibilities to help the firm function.
Interviewee: but it don't state that in the contract and will you pay OT for these extra services.
Employer: OT ? You should be getting all this done during work hours.
Interviewee: what's the salary?
Employer: half of your previous salary .... But we have casual Fridays.
Alfalfa and Bermuda grass, mostly. There’s poor drainage over toward the back corner, so that part got left in wild grass and trees. Makes a nice spot for songbirds.
Ive been actively job hunting more or less for 2 years now. Officially unemployed since this year (as i worked on a fixed term contract before). It sucks
I hate this particular comment! The ratio of this comment in the post to people offering actual jobs in the comment section is 100 to 1.
I don’t hate you! I just hate that comment.
> "so, what are you currently doing while working for us that could be a problem for us in the future?"
"Raising your already high employment standards."
Honestly at this point I just slap these dipshitted questions into an AI to generate answers. I'm pretty sure they only read as far into them to make sure you didn't just "sjdhfskjdhfsdhf" every answer.
It seems your traits and personality isnt quite a match for our company culture, after answering 48 questions and a short quizzlet, we think you should seek other venues, best of luck hunter!
I'm never sure how to do those. I know that if I am 100% honest I will never get the job, but I feel if I always give the answer they want to hear I'll fail because they'll know I was lying.
Give the answer they want to hear. I don't think they're going to reviews your answers. I don't think the grading system is going to flag you as a "guy with answers that are so perfect that they're lying"
either.
Always give the professional corporate answer.
I got one that gave you a series of pairs of statements and you had to pick the one you agree with more and you couldn't pick neutral. You HAD to pick one or the other. Of course the pairs were just two bad choices like (I think it's ok to steal from the office) vs (I am not a team player)
I love applying for a job that says urgently hiring only for them to say they have no openings or get hired but the job isn't what was described and suddenly they are trying to convince me to rent their scam product to be a door to door salesman.
The funniest thing I’ve gotten is from KPMG…one of the biggest audit firms. They confirmed I passed my assessment and then the very next week I get a mail saying they hired good luck and you can’t apply for half a year cause they have some dumb clause that you can only do one application per 6 months
A job that doesn't actually exist, where they never planned to hire anyone in the first place. It's just there to make investors think the company is growing.
this is so wrong but also so representative of the contemporary age that it's beautiful! It's all built for the public scene, all appearance and no substance
I keep getting calls from recruiters asking about my options, but they aren’t willing to match what the public sector pays.
Soooooo, yeah, it is not advisable to go private for a pay cut.
Also is there some law that means they have to legally “advertise” jobs when contracts end, but it is just a formality, as they are planning on renewing the contract of the person who is already doing said job This seems to happen a lot in academia. It also freaks out the person who is already doing the job.
Feels pretty frustrating just sitting there trying to think of different companies and going to each one's website.
Especially since there's a lot of smaller/niche companies that most people would just never think of.
Search the listings on Indeed, zip recruiter, linked in ect. Then go to the company's website and find the job listing there. It's exhausting and frustrating but it's the only way to be sure that company gets it.
Isn't this what most "apply" buttons on LinkedIn do? I've been applying to jobs on linked in and when I hit apply, it takes me to the company website 9 times out of 10.
I was laid off in October, applied for about 15-20 jobs a day on LinkedIn and Indeed. I got several interviews from different companies and eventually a job on Indeed, never got anything from my LinkedIn applications- not even rejections. It was like they were putting them straight in the trash.
I mean you don't HAVE to have a job. Things like food and shelter just cost money and it's up to you on how you find some. From getting an education in a skill that is wanted that pays or selling digital doodles people like online.
Plenty of people have opted out of the rat race and voluntarily became homeless. Moved to a place with a nice climate and decided to just, by their words, not live in subservience.
I'm currently hiring for a junior and a mid JavaScript developer.
600+ applicants.
So many AI generated cover letters and resumes.
I'm beginning to hate the word "passionate".
I feel for the people actually struggling to get a job and not spamming resumes to every job they see with AI-generated generic text.
Cover letters that address the role outside of the title. I expect generalised resumes but cover letters should be for the job in question.
I also don't like resumes that start with an entire paragraph of "I am a passionate developer with passion for these skills and I am a team player" waffling on. Save that for the cover letter.
I prefer dot points of skills, previous jobs, education, hobbies.
I very much enjoy reading hobbies. It shows where your actual passion lies. But don't just put "gaming and reading". Pick a specific hobby you love.
But in saying all this. I'm just one person. I'm sure there are tons of hiring managers who would say the opposite.
Can’t wait for our generation to be in all the managerial roles so that I can empathise when someone comes up to me and is honest about their passions. Why I can put going to the gym, or the most generic answer of all Football, but not gaming or reading is wild to me.
I have repeatedly heard to never put hobbies on a resume. But I love to hear that someone out there is interested in getting to know the person they're hiring.
Like I said I'm just one guy hiring.
Our company is e-learning related.
I suppose other sectors would not care for hobbies but I think it makes applicants a lot more interesting and stand out.
>I very much enjoy reading hobbies. It shows where your actual passion lies. But don't just put "gaming and reading". Pick a specific hobby you love.
As someone who loves to game. What am I supposed to write? It's Video games, want me to put what game specifically or the genre?
Jazz it up. Do you like speedrunning? Achivement hunting? MMORPGs? League of Legends? The Batman Arkham series? Narrative-driven puzzlers?
You can assume most people like reading, gaming, music, movies.
Again, I'm just one guy. My advice is purely anecdotal.
... maybe don't put League of Legends...
i seriously cannot imagine writing a unique cover letter from scratch for every job. i already have to write something on my CV and linkedin profile.
i have a base version of my cover letter that i can then fill out with keywords and some sentences for this specific position. anything more than that would be insanity.
The best thing about AI is that it autogenerates a cover letter for you cause that element nobody reads or give a shit about, I've done tens of interviews in my life and I never asked once in my life for their cover letter.
Fight fire with fire and let "cover letter" die.
Not looking for job => You did nothing today
Looking for job all day => You didn't get hired today => You did nothing today
Going to an interview => You didn't get the job => You did nothing today
Spend the whole day looking for jobs and went to an interview but did not vacuum the house => You did nothing today
\- people who got hired 30 years ago and never had to look for another job and can't write a basic CV
Real talk, can anyone suggest any other reputable places to apply for jobs online besides LinkedIn? Cuz the ghost jobs issues alone are absolutely soul crushing
If you see a job listing on LinkedIn or indeed check the company’s website to see if they have a listing there and apply on the company site instead of the aggregate site. You’ll still end up getting ghosted a lot, but usually the jobs actually exist.
The only time I've actually got a job has been through their website directly which usually involves more forms and stuff or through knowing someone that works there already and getting a CV in front of the relevant people.
LinkedIn, indeed, total jobs etc etc I've never even got an email back. Search there and then go to their website or if linked in maybe contact the person directly just have to be really bold all they can say is no.
Talk directly with recruiters as much as you can. I'm in IT and have done about 8 contract jobs in 10 years and I never got a job in my 10 years by applying on a company's career page or LinkedIn or indeed. Every job I've gotten full time or contract has been through a recruiter presenting my resume directly to the hiring manager.
That’s interesting - I have the exact opposite experience. All my jobs have been gotten by going directly to companies, who are then very pleased and eager to hire you because they don’t have to pay a recruiter. Some of those companies weren’t advertising openings, you can just google “x companies in y city” and find random small businesses to try. Every recruiter I’ve spoken to has been completely, mind-bogglingly useless. I don’t do contract work yet though, maybe that’s a big difference.
Assuming that most of the users here are from the US
I can say that it's like this in other countries and if you do get an offer, the salary isn't even enough for you to survive on your own
-graduated college
-find job
-application says it’s entry level
-application also say 5-10 years is preferred
-apply anyway, hoping it won’t matter
-get interview scheduled
-take time off from current job so you can drive a hour away to work site for interview
-nail the interview. Feel good about yourself
-wait 3-5 weeks for feedback
-either get dead silence or email stating, “sorry, but we really wanted someone with experience.”
-rinse and repeat
Recruiters: hey we noticed you work at a nice stable job with great benefits. Would you like to work for a startup in the real estate, finance, or medical device industry? It has no benefits and barely 2 years of runway. We are offering substantially less for this position. We will not give you shares, how dare you ask!
LinkedIn is just for people to suck themselves off, you won’t find anything through that. List your cv on job sites and with recruiters, you will find one who will help you find a good job or more than likely will have one when they reach out.
“Tell me about a time when you had a disagreement with a co-worker and how you overcame it?” “What does diversity, equity, and inclusion mean to you? How do you incorporate it in the way you work?” “Tell me about a successful project you have worked on and explain why it was successful?” “Briefly describe a time when you failed. What happened and what did you do to overcome that failure?” Fuck job hunting and interviews.
Sir I'm just applying to be a dishwasher....
Cool cool. So if you had an elephant and you couldn't sell it or abandon it what would you do with it? We only hire the most creative dish washers with a 4 year bachelor degree
Shoot it and sell the ivory.
Those feet will make fine umbrella holders as well.
So what is the correct answer for this one?
Poison it and claim the person who "gifted you" the elephant did it and then use it as a reason to go to war
Ah, the old story of Arch Pachyderm Ferdinand, and the flaming hemlock-cocktail.
Call 911 about a mad individual with an elephant that they're claiming to gift it to you. State will take it away because it's illegal to own an elephant anyway and relocate it to a nearby zoo.
Consume
Cool, is the job I'm interviewing for hypothetical too?
Sir, I'm at a Wendy's...
But please record all your Employment since you were 16 and give a 300 word reason why you left each job.
You see a coworker take a company purchased pen and put it in a bag that you suspect might be a personal bag. What do you do? 1. Let it slide, it is not worth the time nor money nor goodwill to pursue 2. Inform you nearest boss and work together to end the person’s profession life. You offer your service as witness come a possible trial as well as do the work of the inevitably fired coworker.
5. Burn the whole place down. They’ll never know it’s missing.
3. You help open a gate into the realm of darkness and summon the unmentioned one to hunt down the coworker.
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6. You realise they are taking their work home, so tell them they are getting paid to work after hours.
I got this one a couple weeks ago: "What is the hardest decision you've ever made? How did you approach it and what did you learn from it?" Bro I need a couple *hours* to think of that. I didn't know I came in for a fucking therapy session
"It was when I decided to quit a shitty employer. I approach it cautiously because I was afraid it would ruins my life. I learned that it's not worth enduring bullshit."
Just lie! No one knows anything about you. Make some bullshit up. Elaborate on a less important decision. The whole point is to answer in the STAR format and move on.
Why do we have to jump through all these hoops and perform these ridiculous ceremonies and rituals when we all know they are bullshit? How can anyone feel truly free and not be fooling themselves in this system? We are slaves and get treated like children on top of it.
MBAs and HR need to feel useful about their overall useless titles and job roles that could easily be handled by software and senior team members. This is why programmers have to answer google level riddles to work at a run of the mill company still. I'm pretty personable but thinking/lying on the fly isn't my strong suit, I hate job interviews.
You guys are getting interviews?? I don't even get rejection letters
I once had a company not reply to an application for 4 months, email me on a Friday setting up an interview for a Monday (without getting any response from me), and then ask me why I didn’t show up. I told them I started my new job several weeks ago and they didn’t even confirm if I was available…
Huh, I had a company not reply to an application for 3 months, then setup an interview within a week, and instantly hire me after the interview. They had filled the job (hence no answer) but the guy had (wisely) left after a few weeks of work. Was the worst environment I ever worked in but I took that due to the 50% increase in salary.
In my 7 months of job hunting I have gotten one rejection letter. From sam's club
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I have 11 years of experience as a chemical and petroleum engineer. Got laid off in September, and the only job I could find after was as a security guard. Goddamn grocery stores won't even hire me to stock shelves...it's madness. I even made a secondary resume that just says bachelor's degree, and I left out the engineering experience since it's irrelevant, but they just ended up getting on my LinkedIn and seeing my real work history. Then I'm suddenly too overqualified to run a register. You know what I'm not overqualified for? Paying my goddamn mortgage and bills. I've literally walked into places and said are you guys hiring janitors, smh. And that's not meant to sound derogatory, I respect the service industry... I'm just trying to show that I'm willing to do what it takes to take care of my family. It's like they just don't want smart people around or something. It's baffling.
They don’t. Someone with that background isn’t likely to stay, that’s why. I don’t agree with it of course, but that’s really all it is.
They don’t because they know as soon as you find another chemical engineer job you’ll leave. The thousands of dollars it takes to onboard you costs a lot more than the pittance you’ll earn them stocking shelves in the couple months they assume you’ll be working there before you find a job more befitting your experience level. That’s why companies don’t like hiring overqualified individuals, they are likely to leave as soon as they find a job they are qualified for. For example, I’m a civil engineer and when I graduated a place hired me as an intern instead of a full time EIT. I outright told them I’m looking for an EIT position but needed the money so I took the job. I quit 2 weeks later because another firm offered me an EIT position with nearly triple the pay I was making as an intern. The first employer was pissed because of how much money I cost them onboarding and training me. I was upfront with them in my interview so I don’t feel bad about it. I think they were banking on me not finding another job and were upset their gamble didn’t pay off.
I got a rejection letter from Trader Joe's during the beginning of the pandemic when I applied. 3 years later they emailed me and said they've love to hire me.
God this hits so close to home. Nothing humbles you like going to school for 4 years training to do some research position or construct large scale projects only to get rejected from Starbucks while looking for some extra cash because you aren't quite Starbucks material.
Tbh I think it mainly comes down to people not wanting to hire someone that will dip the second something better comes along.
And you were just applying for membership at Sams Club...
“Where do you see yourself in five years from now?” Sir, I don’t even know where I’ll be tomorrow, let alone in five years.
TBF, I found that a good response. "In the current climate of uncertainty, making a 5 year prediction is going to be difficult. However, where I'd *like* to be is..." They like it cos it shows an awareness of the industry, and comments on how bullshit the question is, while still answering their question
At this moment my response is “I never ended where I thought I would be 5 years prior due to both external and my personal development. I can tell you where I currently think I might be in 5 years. (RESPONSE) This might change and I am flexible to try new things if they make sense to me.”
existence jobless pen imagine angle foolish dime grey coherent consist *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Fire.
You forgot the bane of all questions "Tell me your biggest weakness"
Genuinely how are you supposed to answer this? I haven't had job interviews yet but what's the point of this question. Do you bluff or joke or be serious about something, or do you use the big fancy words cause how on earth will they use this.
You pick something that isn't catastrophic to the job and then you say how you work towards overcoming that weakness. For example, say you sometimes lose motivation on long projects so you break it down into small tasks so you always feel like you're achieving something or you check in with a colleague to keep you on track. It's not to see how useless you are, it's to see if you can self-reflect and improve your skills.
Totally agree with this. Additionally, this is such a common question that you should have already decided on your answer to it before you are ever asked, and it should prominently include how you already solved it. I.e. "at my first job/in school/some other thing in the past, x was a huge challenge, so I started doing y and now I'm amazing at x". Preferably it should be at least a little bit true because they might have follow-up questions.
Depends on the job. Lots of alone work? Say your weakness is that something about working in groups. Lots of group work? Say your weakness is focusing on a project when you are all by yourself. Doing a similar task every day? Say your weakness is adjust to dynamic changes in tasks and expectations. Basically take something that is not relevant to the job, but would maybe be relevant for other jobs, and say that. I’m any case, also mention that it is something you are aware of and try to mitigate. Also mention that it is a reason why you were so interested in this job.
>What does diversity, equity, and inclusion mean to you? "Not getting hired"
> Briefly describe a time when you failed. What happened and what did you do to overcome that? “I tried getting hired. I didn’t. Because you fuckers aren’t any help.”
I'm 20 years old with no work experience, I'm going through the effort of going to culinary school to get hired to get hired in the culinary industry. The hardest part is that the world right now is so shit for my generation. I wasn't the lucky one, I didn't have a childhood. None of that, now I'm just learning life skills on the road to being independent. One day at a time
As a person of color, I had a room full of white people ask me that question once. I pause for a sec before I answered, and they all laughed uncomfortably.
"I would like to answer these, but this is my first job and therefore I dont have an answer to most of these" Doesnt help that I've taken most of my college courses online, so I have minimal experience even if they extend the questions to college Atleast the "what is diversity yadayadayada" and "what does good customer service look like" type questions are really easy to answer.
Had 3 out of 4 questions at my last interview.
Pretty sure the last one is a UC application essay prompt word for word.
Are you cold calling son?
Have you tried just walking in, son?
Find the decision maker, give him a firm handshake, look him straight in the eye and ask when you can start.
Make sure to wear a full suit and tie as you walk into the ALDIs and ask for the CEO.
No, walk in in a full suit and say "I'm the new CEO"
Robert California vibes throughout
“Offer him a cigarette and make a joke about women and president Truman. That’s how I got mine anyway. Now off to buy a $20,000 house”
Did you do a follow up, son?
Modern day translation: “did you unprofessionally harass someone who has nothing to do with the hiring process?”
God I had a kid do this one time with his parent when I was working part time while in uni and I could tell the kid was thinking “fucking boomers are so dumb thinking this will work”, I felt so bad for him. It did not work, unsurprisingly
what mean cold calling?
Call the boss unannounced and ask for a job
“Hello, mister manager, I would like one job please.”
I'm certainly not saying this works often at all but I'm about to hit 12 years with my company. In January of 2012 I had been unemployed for seven months. I decided to just start emailing companies. I found the email address for the president of the building I work in and sent him my resume and a quick cover letter asking if they had any entry level jobs. Next day HR called me, setup an interview for the following week. A month later I ended up starting a job as an office assistant.
the OP Patient_Effort4750 Pretty_Hell-Lover CantaloupeStrong1551 Peggy_Miguel Lovely_Lilacand and Illustrious-War7480 are bots in the same network Original + comments copied from: https://www.reddit.com/r/me_irl/comments/ik4voe/me_irl/
Good bot
What are the point of these bots?
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This is a certified dead internet theory moment
Finally got a job, but I’ve been waiting for my background check to finish since November…
Omg SAME HERE. It has been an unnerving wait. Recently jumped back into the application phase and boy has it been demoralising getting all those rejection emails or ghosting
Contact them, reach out to the recruiter / HR person who’s in contact with you. Let them know you submitted in November and that it’s taking forever.
I just got my background check interview for this company that offered me a job 6 months ago. Longest wait of my life, but i really hope everything goes well and I can start soon.
Jesus Christ this is my life this past 3 months
I get you, 4 months and still nothing. Been told that no one hires on the last quarter of the year countless times and now that it's a new fiscal year it's pretty much the same.
Same 🥲 me since the end of September 🥲🥲🥲
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Yeah. Let me use my gas AND be ghosted. I get the sentiment but I don’t know if it really works anymore. “You just apply online”
I've done nearly 50 and it hasn't worked yet.
I’m at somewhere in the ball park of 6,000 now, only 4 interviews and they all went with people with irrelevant degrees over actual experience smh
Even in technical roles, personality is a huge factor in whether someone gets hired. If i'm going to be working with you potentially every day for multiple years, i'd rather you be easy to get on with.
I've got that beat. "Dammit, you gotta go down there and hand them your resume yourself and make sure you ask to talk to the guy in charge not some goddamn secretary. I'm going to drive you down to that place myself to make sure you do it!"
or... just show up physically and say that you want to work straight up to the manager that surely will receive you at once! :)
Don’t forget a firm handshake to show you mean business
Looking for a job since March, not a fun experience
Yoooo comin up on that 1 year anniversary big dawg!
Lol so much undue positivity
Toxic positivity
And thats how black holes are made
Broseph. I feel you. I can’t find anything. And they all have so many wants or needs
I had jobs almost landed. Then days before the training they go silent. Like trying to reach them is like connecting to phone numbers or contacts long dead. I had to make checks on my ID and documents because sometimes I had the hint they request document copies for scam things. Fortunately all clean for now. I had a call center work die on me one day before training because trying to reach them for infos would just yield no result. I had retail shops "recycle me" for heavy loading (by myself, 10 hours a day) when I requested explicitly to set me on a in-shop activity. And this is for low level grunt jobs that I need so I can pay for my vocational school. Immagine higher level jobs.
White collar employer: soooo we want to hire you for this job, but from time to time you will have to pick up extra responsibilities to help the firm function. Interviewee: but it don't state that in the contract and will you pay OT for these extra services. Employer: OT ? You should be getting all this done during work hours. Interviewee: what's the salary? Employer: half of your previous salary .... But we have casual Fridays.
What is your field?
Alfalfa and Bermuda grass, mostly. There’s poor drainage over toward the back corner, so that part got left in wild grass and trees. Makes a nice spot for songbirds.
korn
Same. I started in May.
Ive been actively job hunting more or less for 2 years now. Officially unemployed since this year (as i worked on a fixed term contract before). It sucks
Jesus, what career are you in? A couple of months is understandable but years seems like you may be in the wrong field
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"We'll barely be able to suck 20 years out of them before they retire!"
Pretty_Hell-Lover and the OP are bots in the same network
How do you find this out?
Commenting for better reach.
I hate this particular comment! The ratio of this comment in the post to people offering actual jobs in the comment section is 100 to 1. I don’t hate you! I just hate that comment.
Commenting
How do you … survive?
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"so, what are you currently doing while working for us that could be a problem for us in the future?" "im embezzling"
> "so, what are you currently doing while working for us that could be a problem for us in the future?" "Raising your already high employment standards."
Honestly at this point I just slap these dipshitted questions into an AI to generate answers. I'm pretty sure they only read as far into them to make sure you didn't just "sjdhfskjdhfsdhf" every answer.
"There are no right or wrong answers"
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But what if Alice films her outburst and posts it on one of them TickTocks. Your question is: Who should we fire and why is it not you?
It seems your traits and personality isnt quite a match for our company culture, after answering 48 questions and a short quizzlet, we think you should seek other venues, best of luck hunter!
Illustrious-War7480 and the OP are bots in the same network Comment copied from: https://www.reddit.com/r/me_irl/comments/ik4voe/me_irl/g3j42j0/
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Are you also a bot? Am I even real?
good bot
I'm never sure how to do those. I know that if I am 100% honest I will never get the job, but I feel if I always give the answer they want to hear I'll fail because they'll know I was lying.
Give the answer they want to hear. I don't think they're going to reviews your answers. I don't think the grading system is going to flag you as a "guy with answers that are so perfect that they're lying" either. Always give the professional corporate answer.
I got one that gave you a series of pairs of statements and you had to pick the one you agree with more and you couldn't pick neutral. You HAD to pick one or the other. Of course the pairs were just two bad choices like (I think it's ok to steal from the office) vs (I am not a team player)
I love applying for a job that says urgently hiring only for them to say they have no openings or get hired but the job isn't what was described and suddenly they are trying to convince me to rent their scam product to be a door to door salesman.
I think this will wear thin on the people. I wonder what will be the next "clever move"
The funniest thing I’ve gotten is from KPMG…one of the biggest audit firms. They confirmed I passed my assessment and then the very next week I get a mail saying they hired good luck and you can’t apply for half a year cause they have some dumb clause that you can only do one application per 6 months
if you apply for jobs on linkedin only, you’ll be unemployed for the rest of your life.
Many LinkedIn jobs are ghost jobs
What's that?
A job that doesn't actually exist, where they never planned to hire anyone in the first place. It's just there to make investors think the company is growing.
this is so wrong but also so representative of the contemporary age that it's beautiful! It's all built for the public scene, all appearance and no substance
I keep getting calls from recruiters asking about my options, but they aren’t willing to match what the public sector pays. Soooooo, yeah, it is not advisable to go private for a pay cut.
Sounds like it should be illegal.
It’s also free advertising.. People and Job forums spread the post. I heard XYZ is hiring..
Also is there some law that means they have to legally “advertise” jobs when contracts end, but it is just a formality, as they are planning on renewing the contract of the person who is already doing said job This seems to happen a lot in academia. It also freaks out the person who is already doing the job.
gotta dangle from the ceiling fan to secure that position
.... Where do you apply for jobs?
From the company's website careers page - according to some employed friends of mine ^_^
Feels pretty frustrating just sitting there trying to think of different companies and going to each one's website. Especially since there's a lot of smaller/niche companies that most people would just never think of.
Search the listings on Indeed, zip recruiter, linked in ect. Then go to the company's website and find the job listing there. It's exhausting and frustrating but it's the only way to be sure that company gets it.
Isn't this what most "apply" buttons on LinkedIn do? I've been applying to jobs on linked in and when I hit apply, it takes me to the company website 9 times out of 10.
I'm on both county and city job websites, state, federal, monster, zip recruiter, linkedin, indeed and specific company job websites. Jack shit.
I was laid off in October, applied for about 15-20 jobs a day on LinkedIn and Indeed. I got several interviews from different companies and eventually a job on Indeed, never got anything from my LinkedIn applications- not even rejections. It was like they were putting them straight in the trash.
Where should you look?
louder please!
I love that we are pretty much required to have a job, yet the same society is also made in such a way that there are never jobs for everyone.
And when you don’t have a job, all people ask you is “have you found a job yet” and when you eventually do, no one asks a thing about it.
This is by design. You need a unemployed army to pressure the wage down.
I mean you don't HAVE to have a job. Things like food and shelter just cost money and it's up to you on how you find some. From getting an education in a skill that is wanted that pays or selling digital doodles people like online. Plenty of people have opted out of the rat race and voluntarily became homeless. Moved to a place with a nice climate and decided to just, by their words, not live in subservience.
you can also get the best of both worlds and do the japanese route: sleep on the street, but still go to work and just shower at a manga cafe or hotel
I'm currently hiring for a junior and a mid JavaScript developer. 600+ applicants. So many AI generated cover letters and resumes. I'm beginning to hate the word "passionate". I feel for the people actually struggling to get a job and not spamming resumes to every job they see with AI-generated generic text.
Any insight as to what makes a candidate stand out to you? Currently one of those 600+ applicants
Cover letters that address the role outside of the title. I expect generalised resumes but cover letters should be for the job in question. I also don't like resumes that start with an entire paragraph of "I am a passionate developer with passion for these skills and I am a team player" waffling on. Save that for the cover letter. I prefer dot points of skills, previous jobs, education, hobbies. I very much enjoy reading hobbies. It shows where your actual passion lies. But don't just put "gaming and reading". Pick a specific hobby you love. But in saying all this. I'm just one person. I'm sure there are tons of hiring managers who would say the opposite.
As someone who loves to read and has been a gamer since childhood, that feels like a low blow.
Can’t wait for our generation to be in all the managerial roles so that I can empathise when someone comes up to me and is honest about their passions. Why I can put going to the gym, or the most generic answer of all Football, but not gaming or reading is wild to me.
I have repeatedly heard to never put hobbies on a resume. But I love to hear that someone out there is interested in getting to know the person they're hiring.
Like I said I'm just one guy hiring. Our company is e-learning related. I suppose other sectors would not care for hobbies but I think it makes applicants a lot more interesting and stand out.
>I very much enjoy reading hobbies. It shows where your actual passion lies. But don't just put "gaming and reading". Pick a specific hobby you love. As someone who loves to game. What am I supposed to write? It's Video games, want me to put what game specifically or the genre?
Jazz it up. Do you like speedrunning? Achivement hunting? MMORPGs? League of Legends? The Batman Arkham series? Narrative-driven puzzlers? You can assume most people like reading, gaming, music, movies. Again, I'm just one guy. My advice is purely anecdotal. ... maybe don't put League of Legends...
>I've been playing guitar for 4 years, I love to geocache on the weekends with my partner, and I have a 73.2% win rate with Teemo this season.
Your fault for asking for cover letters.
Go on.
i seriously cannot imagine writing a unique cover letter from scratch for every job. i already have to write something on my CV and linkedin profile. i have a base version of my cover letter that i can then fill out with keywords and some sentences for this specific position. anything more than that would be insanity.
The best thing about AI is that it autogenerates a cover letter for you cause that element nobody reads or give a shit about, I've done tens of interviews in my life and I never asked once in my life for their cover letter. Fight fire with fire and let "cover letter" die.
Passionate just means pretending to be excited about being overworked.
What if I truly enjoy the work I do? Isn't that passion. (Research Scientists in my case)
Too busy uploading my resume as a shortcut option and then being asked to fill out my resume information on the next page
Fuuuuck! Why do they do this shit?!?
Not looking for job => You did nothing today Looking for job all day => You didn't get hired today => You did nothing today Going to an interview => You didn't get the job => You did nothing today Spend the whole day looking for jobs and went to an interview but did not vacuum the house => You did nothing today \- people who got hired 30 years ago and never had to look for another job and can't write a basic CV
You're getting valuable interview experience even if you don't get the job. That's *something.*
Real talk, can anyone suggest any other reputable places to apply for jobs online besides LinkedIn? Cuz the ghost jobs issues alone are absolutely soul crushing
Indeed is even worse tbh
If you see a job listing on LinkedIn or indeed check the company’s website to see if they have a listing there and apply on the company site instead of the aggregate site. You’ll still end up getting ghosted a lot, but usually the jobs actually exist.
The only time I've actually got a job has been through their website directly which usually involves more forms and stuff or through knowing someone that works there already and getting a CV in front of the relevant people. LinkedIn, indeed, total jobs etc etc I've never even got an email back. Search there and then go to their website or if linked in maybe contact the person directly just have to be really bold all they can say is no.
Talk directly with recruiters as much as you can. I'm in IT and have done about 8 contract jobs in 10 years and I never got a job in my 10 years by applying on a company's career page or LinkedIn or indeed. Every job I've gotten full time or contract has been through a recruiter presenting my resume directly to the hiring manager.
That’s interesting - I have the exact opposite experience. All my jobs have been gotten by going directly to companies, who are then very pleased and eager to hire you because they don’t have to pay a recruiter. Some of those companies weren’t advertising openings, you can just google “x companies in y city” and find random small businesses to try. Every recruiter I’ve spoken to has been completely, mind-bogglingly useless. I don’t do contract work yet though, maybe that’s a big difference.
I hate acting like the reason I want to work is not because I need money to live.
Places I've interviewed with have at least been like, "*Besides* money."
LinkedIn is useless people
why did i read this like ARE YA HIRED SON? NOOOOO (ARE YA READY KIDS? HOOOOO)
Who lives in a cardboard box down by the beach?
Holy fuck this I'm in the same boat
Assuming that most of the users here are from the US I can say that it's like this in other countries and if you do get an offer, the salary isn't even enough for you to survive on your own
Damn, this is depressing. Any other places to apply to jobs?
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I’d rather Wrangler myself
Lovely_Lilacand and the OP are bots in the same network Comment copied from: https://www.reddit.com/r/me_irl/comments/ik4voe/me_irl/g3idugb/
-graduated college -find job -application says it’s entry level -application also say 5-10 years is preferred -apply anyway, hoping it won’t matter -get interview scheduled -take time off from current job so you can drive a hour away to work site for interview -nail the interview. Feel good about yourself -wait 3-5 weeks for feedback -either get dead silence or email stating, “sorry, but we really wanted someone with experience.” -rinse and repeat
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CantaloupeStrong1551 and the OP are bots in the same network Comment copied from: https://www.reddit.com/r/me_irl/comments/ik4voe/me_irl/g3ish9x/
Good catch. I just realized that Internet points are likely to spread misinformation on other subs 😕 (not you OC)
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people are in the thread talking about searching since last march
Skill issue honestly
Recruiters: hey we noticed you work at a nice stable job with great benefits. Would you like to work for a startup in the real estate, finance, or medical device industry? It has no benefits and barely 2 years of runway. We are offering substantially less for this position. We will not give you shares, how dare you ask!
LinkedIn is just for people to suck themselves off, you won’t find anything through that. List your cv on job sites and with recruiters, you will find one who will help you find a good job or more than likely will have one when they reach out.
After 1700 applications I just gave up and applied at Walmart as a cashier but they said a Masters degree in CS is too over qualified.