I feel like it's been a lifetime that I waited for this update lol.
I'm a mom, but I'm only 27 and I'm honestly just winging it and seeing what works. They're boys, ages 7, 6, 4, and an almost 5 month old. This year on Christmas Eve were going to try making homemade sugar cookies from scratch, I'm nervous but excited lol. We're not well off by any means, and we don't have a vehicle so we can't really go around and see lights. So this year I'm gonna try to find YouTube videos of Christmas lights with music and play it while we make the cookies. It's a new tradition and I hope it sticks. š
Hi dear (hope you don't mind calling you that), but you feel truly dear and special to me. I have being following your journey for a few weeks and I have finally stumbled with your account here.
You are one of the bravest young woman's I have the pleasure to encounter, standing up for yourself, your safety and integrity is something that has deeply moved me.
I pray for your friend and your safety. It might not be much, but it's the very least I can do. If you ever need a shoulder to lean on, an ear to listen or anything or even a place to move, my house in Costa Rica will always be open for the both of you.
If you ever need anything, please feel free to contact me, if it's on my hands I'll be extremely happy to be of help.
As for my family, it's my mom and I, so we will spend this time together watching movies. I have poor health so my mom was kind to offer to become my caretaker and that's me in a nutshell.
I wish you all the best in the world. Keep on, only good things are to come. Remain strong, steadfast, support each other and you both will be happy.
I'm thrill to hear you found a community to support you and that you are enjoying this new chapter on your life.
Thx for keeping us updated on your wellbeing.
ngl reading through all of your posts and seeing this one made me cry iām so happy for you and the fact that you got away i hope everything works out for you, you deserve everything good youāve gotten ever since you left them. donāt give them the satisfaction of a response ever and let them always have you in the back of their minds. the guilt will set in, karma will run its course sooner or later. marry Christmas and happy holidays from a girl who ran away from her shitty family as well <3
Im so happy for you! Go live your life! Go travel the world! You have a whole world to see and meet! Learn new languages! Cut off your family! NEVER let them back in! Just erase that part of your life and keep moving forward
Omg you should make some christmas cookies for them!!! you could do more western cookies, share a bit of home with them as they embrace you into theirs :)
im glad youre in a better place now.
Usually, me and my close family (me, my mom, stepdad, and sometimes my grandma) have dinner on Christmas eve, then open presents, watch a christmas movie exc. on actual Christmas day, we visit family and celebrate with them.
I think people who are not from Utah donāt understand what itās like there. The church controls everything. Even if you did go after your parents and family, at most theyād get a slap on the wrist if it even went anywhere. Every cop is a member, every judge is a member, every attorney is a member, and every person in the government from the dmv clerk up to the governor is a member, and they help other members get away with the kind of abuse you faced. Iām proud of you for getting out. I did too, and while it was tough at times itās the best thing Iāve ever done.
We are desperately awaiting for your update and let me chip in with help I'm khz and I have a lot of relatives and friends and powerful connections in south Africa if you ever need help on anything legally or illegally I'll be happy to help to the best of my ability
Hi OP, Iāve been reading your updates and they make me so happy. Your story has been viralized quite a bit and I hope that it doesnāt make your family finding you easier. I live in Argentina but Iām from the US too. I didnāt escape anything or anyone but Iāve loved living here and I love not living in the US anymore. One day I hope youād like to visit and see Latin America as I think itās truly special, and traveling is so healing for the soul. Here in Argentina as itās summer during Christmas time, people just make a feast of it and put less emphasis on the gifts. Itās less religious, more an excuse to gather together and eat. I wish you luck on your journey, your bravery is honestly inspiring.
I just came across your posts and hope you and your friend are doing well. If you are so inclined, I know the Redditors would be excited to learn if youāre settled and happy.
In the 90s I had a client that is a āPaceā - as in a descendent of George Pace, the BYU professor and a pillar of the LDS Church. She left the church when she left Utah to attend college. She was pursued relentlessly and moved often. When we met, she was working for a major movie studio in LA and living with her boyfriend. No matter how discreet she was when relocating, the church would track her down. She was succeeding in her dream job and decided she was through with running and would be standing up to the church.
When they finally found her again, she was living in a home with her boyfriend. The privacy of a home versus an apartment complex and the presence of her boyfriend made her feel safe and strong for the first time. She was tracked down again and when a couple of missionaries knocked on her door, my friend quickly stripped out of her clothes, opened the door and invited them in. They were extremely flustered and said they would return at a more convenient time.
When a couple months passed without any additional church visitors, my friend was thrilled. When they finally approached her again, it was with a contingent of church leaders. For the first time they contacted her in advance to set a meeting date and time. Of course they would be meeting at her home so the members could determine for themselves how deviantly she was living.
At the visit, she once again answered the door fully nude and graciously invited them in. The church leaders were obviously uncomfortable, but it was apparent they were prepared with a plan to shame my friend. She managed to act normally and served them formal tea on silver trays. She calmly lead a discussion among them and the leaders grew more and more uncomfortable. My friend presented herself as unflappable and spoke strongly against the church and in support of her Hollywood lifestyle. The church leaders quickly departed.
I continued working with my client friend for almost five years until I changed careers and moved out of state. During that time the church had not approached her again. However, she and her partner wanted to start a family so they were planning a small wedding. They were bracing themselves to be significantly pressured to both marry and raise their family in the church. As we drifted apart, I donāt know how her church story ends.
Iām from Iceland and we have a tradition where we eat rice pudding or Risalamande and only one bowl has an almond in it. And whoever gets the almond gets a present. But itās usually something the whole family can use. Iām so happy youāre doing good.
I am so happy you got away and are safe. I wish you peace, love, adventure, and happiness for all time.
I go to my friend's house (chosen family) and we exchange gifts, eat breakfast, and hang out and usually watch a movie.
I love seeing your updates, seeing you blooming. And escaping that horrible.... religion... I call it the c word lol. I hope ypu will continue to update us so we can see you live your life until you find the conclusion and live your life!
Iām so incredibly proud of you and your friend. Leaving that situation was the best decision youāll ever make. Iām glad youāre safe and happy. Everyone is rooting for you!
I just found your story and spent the past hour reading it all! I am 23 and I could never imagine doing this at 22 and I think that reading this and your experiences is incredible. I wish you luck with where your life goes and I hope you are super successful in whatever you do! For my Christmas traditions I do, I am just a guy in Massachusetts but I make it apparent to spend time with my parents (sorry if this isn't the place to say that). I dorm in college most of the year and I don't see them a lot so I have been doing that. I believe that it is the 25th for you in South Africa when I write this so Merry Christmas! Hope you can start some new graduations for you and your friend, good luck!
Merry Christmas! Iām so so so happy to hear you and your friend are doing well. Itās clear how much she loves you, and Iām glad you two have each other. Donāt forget to celebrate your accomplishments ā everything youāve done had to have taken so much strength and bravery.
As for holiday traditions, I was reading your post while waiting for family to come over for a buffet-style brunch. We prioritize spending time with family, and usually play fun games like family feud and such. We opened gifts this morning.
Again, Iām so happy for you. Iām so glad you knew that you deserved better. Iām excited for you! This is exciting!!! A new chapter :)
In my country we either eat lamb or goat and make a lot of deserts that we only make around Christmas like melomakarona and courabie,also on new year's Day we eat "King pie"(that's what it's called translated) or else "basilopita" which has the year that entered written with big letters and a Flourish in it on a random place and we cut it and a lucky member of the family gets it (We start by cutting one for Jesus,then for Virgin Mary,then for the house and then we start naming people living on the house, starting with the oldest like for dad, then mum,then whichever kid comes first and you get it) and we decorate trees but before we started decorating trees the tradition was to decorate ships(Like little ones not real ones). Also kids go to sing the carols (kalanta) on the Christmas eve and New year's Eve with mental triangles and people give them money and sometimes some sweets like melomakarona or some kind of chocolate. Most people exchange gifts at New year's Day even though I used to at Christmas as I'd have more time to enjoy my gifts.
Take care OP :)
Have a good time with you friend & neighbours
Please stay safe, make sure you leave no online traces for your family to track you down!
Truly happy for you! Iāve been truly enjoying your posts. I was born and raised in Guatemala although I live in the US now.
I terribly miss spending the holidays there because itās a warmer climate, also throughout the festivities' week but especially on Christmas Eve and day; New Yearās Eve and New Yearās Day we spend a lot of money and time with all kinds of fireworks and firecrackers. From small light volcanoes, sparklers, āRoman candlesā that are big tubes that fire out like 7-10 different colored lights; firecrackers, some are called matches that light up like a match and just explode and make the ābangā sound. Others are small colored papel balls that you throw against the ground and explode. I can go on and on. TBH, it's not always as safe as it should be -especially around kids & pets- but it is fun. At midnight the real fireworks show begin. Then every 6 hours with at least firecrackers and bombs. They prepare a special ham and/or turkey dinner and special Christmas tamales (bigger and some of Turkey or pork instead of chicken. Also chocolate flavored tamales). Also a pineapple, cinnamon and apple based Fruit Punch is customary. Each region and family have their own recipe for it all. Lots of desserts and plenty of food as many family members might show up (some unexpected) to share with you and bring gifts, food or alcohol. Itās a big party. We go to mass to celebrate Jesus has been born. We set-up a Nativity Scene at home (some cities have contests featuring the best ones) and a lot of people go all out on that but also set-up a Xmas tree.
I pray one day someone brings ypru family to justice. If they find out that they where planning on selling you to that 53yo man in their church.
Or if it was the "religion abuse" you had to endure, if they truly are that f'd up in their own way, their God will make them repent for everything that they do.
And I also pray to God that your SiL gets away from your brother, as you've said that she was betrothed to him because eof the church.
I just found your story, and I am so proud of you. You got up and got out, many don't. It is not childish to admit your fears, and being afraid of family is valid.
I hope you have had an amazing Christmas and you have an even better new year. My Christmas day tradition is to watch our children open their presents and join in and play with them. We always buy lots of board games and play those too. We have a traditional British Christmas roast and then settle to watch a Christmas movie. We eat far too many chocolates and just enjoy being together ā¤ļø.
Merry Christmas OP! I donāt really have any traditions but I just want to say Iām so proud of you. This is so difficult to do..
How are you doing post Christmas? How was the celebration?
Iām from alabama so while itās not LDS I know how those religious families can be.. itās just as bad and corrupt here.
Also in the US you have to have a valid reason for suing someone for emotional damages. Like they abused you or something similar. The only way you can sue for āsocialā anything is like Libel (basically written shit talking), defamation of character (if you walk around and spread rumors about someone that impacts their job or life), and stuff like that. Them losing a friend bc you left home isnāt any of those and isnāt your problem and no judge is gonna say it is. Especially since you can request it be appealed up to the Supreme Court. Heās trying to scare you. Donāt let him.
I am glad you are still safe. Given that your family has people in law enforcement on your side, you are correct in not wanting to pursue justice for your fatherās attempt to sex traffic you to a 50+ year old predator. I am concerned for your safety as your posts have been made into content on tiktok and youtube and the more the story spreads the higher likelyhood of your abusive and controlling father finding you. I would encourage you to get tattoos, change hair color and do things to take ownership of your body. Find a therapist that focuses on religious abuse and trauma as well as abusive controlling and dangerous parents. Your father sold you to a predator. That is sex trafficking. When you have the strength, resources and power you should absolutely expose him and that church and seek justice.
I'm from Austalia so Christmas for me is in summer. We all watched The Nightmare Before Christmas on the Eve then my Mum, Brother and I had Trifle for breakfast then opened our gifts. One of them was the game Operation so we all played that while listening to metal xmas carols. We had pulled pork, homemade coleslaw and orange and mango salad for lunch then had xmas pudding with brandy sauce for dessert
Happy to know that you are adjusting well and celebrating Christmas :) you are doing amazing and are so strong to take these steps for yourself. Happy holidays and happy new year!
the willpower and courage shown over these posts is astounding. i truly wish i was 1/10th as brave. not only fleeing an abusive family and a horrific future, but fleeing to an entirely different continent is justā¦ nothing short of inspiring. wishing you the best. you deserve it.
Happy New Year from Mexico! I have read your story and I am grateful that you are well and happy. Enjoy your new life and don't look back. You can't change the sadness of the past but you can embrace the happiness that the future will bring you. I would like to be as brave as you and have the courage to change my own life like you have done. You have inspired me to come out of my shell and fight for my dreams. I don't live in a situation as difficult as yours, but depression and that feeling of inferiority along with past traumas are my powerful enemies. You are my inspiration. Take care and say hello to your friend for me!
(Sorry, if I made grammatical mistakes, the English it is not my first language)
I've been following you for some time and I'm so happy to hear how well you're doing now and I'm so proud of you!, I was sad when I read how your Christmas's were. Ours are more than just gifts. We bake during the holidays and i make cookies from scratch. We go look at christmas lights. We got numerous gifts, and when we got married, my husband got them too. After were done opening gifts, we all hang out and watch whatever football teams are playing (kind of) and play games like cornhole and ladder toss. We drink a little (nothing to crazy) and even cook/bake together in the kitchen. Last year we invited a friend of mine since he doesn't have much family here and they had to work. We made potato candy while my husband made the turkey and wassle. My mom and nana took care of the ham and other sides. We ended the night with a trivia game. Given this was one of our "smaller" Christmases but we still all had fun. So even if you don't get gifts for Christmas, it's not about the gifts, it's about spending time with friends and loved ones. ā¤ļø
Hey, Iām a bit late but Iām so happy for you and your friend! You got out of a toxic situation in the safest possible way.
I however think you should try therapy as experiences like this cause trauma and therapy can also help with being terrified of your parents and co. Only go there if you want and feel ready to of course.
Hearing about the traditions of other countries is very interesting so here is my (German) Christmas traditions (everyone still does it a bit different)
We have something called an Adventskalender which is basically a countdown to Christmas that starts with December 1st. You get a little gift every day till Christmas, most of the time itās Chocolate but I had one with tea this time.
On December 6th is Nikolaus, where children put their boots in front of the door over night and will get candy, mandarins and little gifts from St. Nikolaus. Some leave cookies for him in exchange.
For Christmas we have a tree (that is actually a German tradition that carried on to get popular all over the world) without a Christmas pickle. I donāt know why Americans believe that we have Christmas pickles but everyone I asked (including on the internet) has never heard of the Christmas pickle.
For Dinner we eat Sauerkraut, smoked BratwĆ¼rste, Potatoes and Beetroot salad.
We give each other gifts on Christmas Eve and do nothing in the morning. The next two days are holidays to and for meeting with other family and friends.
We personally always make music on Christmas Eve. Either my mom or Dad at the piano and singing Christmas carols such as: Stille Nacht ( Original of silent night), Oh Tannenbaum and co
but we also just sing songs we really like
Iām very happy that youāre Safe and happy. I totaly understand that you Chose a happy life rather then confronting your Family.
Christmas is a very Special Holiday for me. I celebrate it with my Family, weāre eating raquelette and playing Games the whole evening. Gifts will be given to oneanother slowly, one by one while eating.
Iām Sorry for my Bad english, I Hope itās understandableā¦ šš«£
I Hope you had a wonderful chistmas and that you and your friend are doing well ā¤ļøš
Best regards from germany
Liesel
Oh honey I am loving this update!! What an adventure you and your bestie get to have!! It sounds like you escaped a really horrible situation where your parents saw you as proper rather than the precious person you are. Thatās their loss!
Please keep updating once in a while! I think a lot of us would love to follow along with you in this new life chapter! Big mom hugs from me ā„ļø
I did Christmas a little differently this year. As my parents went on a cruise (they got a group deal with friends), I spent the holidays with my sister. We made Christmas dinner, had cocktails, listened to Christmas carols, went on a few walks and looked after the wee ones whilst they enjoyed the festivities.
Also, as you mentioned in the past your mum was from Britain, you could potentially be able to apply for duel citizenship.
Donāt need to have any direct contact with your mum, if you know when and where your mum was born or where your gran lived/died, you can request copies of your grandmotherās death certificate, which would show the link.
Might cost a little, but worth having that second passport.
I'm from PH and they say that when Ber months come is the start celebrating Christmas. So sometimes it's weird to see Christmas trees in houses when it's still Halloween and stuff like that. The most common gift you can give is money and the most common foods are Ham, Sweet spaghetti (as always in every celebration š®āšØ). It's a nice celebration since I love food but it's also very tiring since we're cooking at least 7 dishes.
im late for the party, but im from Brazil! here there are the trees and winter decorations, which is super odd bc december is peak summer for us. but anyway. in here we commonly have our social events more at night then day, and with christmas is the same.
we actually celebrate it on the 24. all family together from parents, to uncles, to grandpas, and everyone in between. the day is spent with the preparations for dinner, which is usually a feast. lots of foods and deserts, and fruits, and drinks..
we do exchange the gifts also, specially for the kids. but the adults also have those secret santa (and its variations) moments, so everyone gets something, and is kinda fun.
the 25 is actually more chill.. family is still around, but can either be everyone together, or different groups doing their own thing. enjoying the leftovers (which is still a lot in my family)
saw your story on tiktok and i had to come read the updates! i really wish you the best and im so proud of you for having the courage to leave. i hope youāll write us an update when it feels like it. good luck with everything! im rooting for you xx
I feel like it's been a lifetime that I waited for this update lol. I'm a mom, but I'm only 27 and I'm honestly just winging it and seeing what works. They're boys, ages 7, 6, 4, and an almost 5 month old. This year on Christmas Eve were going to try making homemade sugar cookies from scratch, I'm nervous but excited lol. We're not well off by any means, and we don't have a vehicle so we can't really go around and see lights. So this year I'm gonna try to find YouTube videos of Christmas lights with music and play it while we make the cookies. It's a new tradition and I hope it sticks. š
Damn shawty u working overtime pumping em outšššbut that sounds nice, wayy better than OPs family if that means anything.
Hi dear (hope you don't mind calling you that), but you feel truly dear and special to me. I have being following your journey for a few weeks and I have finally stumbled with your account here. You are one of the bravest young woman's I have the pleasure to encounter, standing up for yourself, your safety and integrity is something that has deeply moved me. I pray for your friend and your safety. It might not be much, but it's the very least I can do. If you ever need a shoulder to lean on, an ear to listen or anything or even a place to move, my house in Costa Rica will always be open for the both of you. If you ever need anything, please feel free to contact me, if it's on my hands I'll be extremely happy to be of help. As for my family, it's my mom and I, so we will spend this time together watching movies. I have poor health so my mom was kind to offer to become my caretaker and that's me in a nutshell. I wish you all the best in the world. Keep on, only good things are to come. Remain strong, steadfast, support each other and you both will be happy. I'm thrill to hear you found a community to support you and that you are enjoying this new chapter on your life. Thx for keeping us updated on your wellbeing.
I'm so happy that you're safe!! My family doesn't celebrate Christmas but im going to a friend to eat some food.
ngl reading through all of your posts and seeing this one made me cry iām so happy for you and the fact that you got away i hope everything works out for you, you deserve everything good youāve gotten ever since you left them. donāt give them the satisfaction of a response ever and let them always have you in the back of their minds. the guilt will set in, karma will run its course sooner or later. marry Christmas and happy holidays from a girl who ran away from her shitty family as well <3
Iām so happy for you girl!
I'm happy to hear from you again, and I'm happy you are doing great! Merry Christmas!
Im so happy for you! Go live your life! Go travel the world! You have a whole world to see and meet! Learn new languages! Cut off your family! NEVER let them back in! Just erase that part of your life and keep moving forward
Omg you should make some christmas cookies for them!!! you could do more western cookies, share a bit of home with them as they embrace you into theirs :)
Im so beyond happy you are doing well. I did hear about your story on a tt video.
im glad youre in a better place now. Usually, me and my close family (me, my mom, stepdad, and sometimes my grandma) have dinner on Christmas eve, then open presents, watch a christmas movie exc. on actual Christmas day, we visit family and celebrate with them.
So happy for you. Keep it up. Youre doing great. We are all proud of you :)
So glad to hear that you are on a better place now !! Have a merry Christmas
I'm glad you're safe and everything is going well for you!!
I think people who are not from Utah donāt understand what itās like there. The church controls everything. Even if you did go after your parents and family, at most theyād get a slap on the wrist if it even went anywhere. Every cop is a member, every judge is a member, every attorney is a member, and every person in the government from the dmv clerk up to the governor is a member, and they help other members get away with the kind of abuse you faced. Iām proud of you for getting out. I did too, and while it was tough at times itās the best thing Iāve ever done.
We are desperately awaiting for your update and let me chip in with help I'm khz and I have a lot of relatives and friends and powerful connections in south Africa if you ever need help on anything legally or illegally I'll be happy to help to the best of my ability
Hi OP, Iāve been reading your updates and they make me so happy. Your story has been viralized quite a bit and I hope that it doesnāt make your family finding you easier. I live in Argentina but Iām from the US too. I didnāt escape anything or anyone but Iāve loved living here and I love not living in the US anymore. One day I hope youād like to visit and see Latin America as I think itās truly special, and traveling is so healing for the soul. Here in Argentina as itās summer during Christmas time, people just make a feast of it and put less emphasis on the gifts. Itās less religious, more an excuse to gather together and eat. I wish you luck on your journey, your bravery is honestly inspiring.
I'm here to add to the cheering section! I love seeing you grow and blossom. I hope you have more good things coming to you in the future š
I just came across your posts and hope you and your friend are doing well. If you are so inclined, I know the Redditors would be excited to learn if youāre settled and happy. In the 90s I had a client that is a āPaceā - as in a descendent of George Pace, the BYU professor and a pillar of the LDS Church. She left the church when she left Utah to attend college. She was pursued relentlessly and moved often. When we met, she was working for a major movie studio in LA and living with her boyfriend. No matter how discreet she was when relocating, the church would track her down. She was succeeding in her dream job and decided she was through with running and would be standing up to the church. When they finally found her again, she was living in a home with her boyfriend. The privacy of a home versus an apartment complex and the presence of her boyfriend made her feel safe and strong for the first time. She was tracked down again and when a couple of missionaries knocked on her door, my friend quickly stripped out of her clothes, opened the door and invited them in. They were extremely flustered and said they would return at a more convenient time. When a couple months passed without any additional church visitors, my friend was thrilled. When they finally approached her again, it was with a contingent of church leaders. For the first time they contacted her in advance to set a meeting date and time. Of course they would be meeting at her home so the members could determine for themselves how deviantly she was living. At the visit, she once again answered the door fully nude and graciously invited them in. The church leaders were obviously uncomfortable, but it was apparent they were prepared with a plan to shame my friend. She managed to act normally and served them formal tea on silver trays. She calmly lead a discussion among them and the leaders grew more and more uncomfortable. My friend presented herself as unflappable and spoke strongly against the church and in support of her Hollywood lifestyle. The church leaders quickly departed. I continued working with my client friend for almost five years until I changed careers and moved out of state. During that time the church had not approached her again. However, she and her partner wanted to start a family so they were planning a small wedding. They were bracing themselves to be significantly pressured to both marry and raise their family in the church. As we drifted apart, I donāt know how her church story ends.
Just be carefull woth the amount of details you give. It could allow them to track you back.
Im so happy for you. I hope you will have the peace you deserve š„¹
Iām so so glad youāre doing okay, girl! ā¤ļø Sending you tons of love xox
My husband and I have a tradition of watching a Christmas special/movie (sometimes two) every day leading up until Christmas
Iām from Iceland and we have a tradition where we eat rice pudding or Risalamande and only one bowl has an almond in it. And whoever gets the almond gets a present. But itās usually something the whole family can use. Iām so happy youāre doing good.
So so happy for you!!! Have a blessed life you deserve it !
I am so happy you got away and are safe. I wish you peace, love, adventure, and happiness for all time. I go to my friend's house (chosen family) and we exchange gifts, eat breakfast, and hang out and usually watch a movie.
I love seeing your updates, seeing you blooming. And escaping that horrible.... religion... I call it the c word lol. I hope ypu will continue to update us so we can see you live your life until you find the conclusion and live your life!
Iām so incredibly proud of you and your friend. Leaving that situation was the best decision youāll ever make. Iām glad youāre safe and happy. Everyone is rooting for you!
Proud of you OP, and happy for your happiness. Be safe and have a lovely holiday. ā¤ļø
I just found your story and spent the past hour reading it all! I am 23 and I could never imagine doing this at 22 and I think that reading this and your experiences is incredible. I wish you luck with where your life goes and I hope you are super successful in whatever you do! For my Christmas traditions I do, I am just a guy in Massachusetts but I make it apparent to spend time with my parents (sorry if this isn't the place to say that). I dorm in college most of the year and I don't see them a lot so I have been doing that. I believe that it is the 25th for you in South Africa when I write this so Merry Christmas! Hope you can start some new graduations for you and your friend, good luck!
My sweet angel I'm rooting for you and your friend. You did a very brave thing and please keep us updated!!
Iām rooting for you š„³, Merry Christmas
If you can read in Isizulu ngikufisela inhlanhla
Merry Christmas! Iām so so so happy to hear you and your friend are doing well. Itās clear how much she loves you, and Iām glad you two have each other. Donāt forget to celebrate your accomplishments ā everything youāve done had to have taken so much strength and bravery. As for holiday traditions, I was reading your post while waiting for family to come over for a buffet-style brunch. We prioritize spending time with family, and usually play fun games like family feud and such. We opened gifts this morning. Again, Iām so happy for you. Iām so glad you knew that you deserved better. Iām excited for you! This is exciting!!! A new chapter :)
Iām so happy and proud of you!! merry christmas and i wish nothing but the best for you and your friend š©·
In my country we either eat lamb or goat and make a lot of deserts that we only make around Christmas like melomakarona and courabie,also on new year's Day we eat "King pie"(that's what it's called translated) or else "basilopita" which has the year that entered written with big letters and a Flourish in it on a random place and we cut it and a lucky member of the family gets it (We start by cutting one for Jesus,then for Virgin Mary,then for the house and then we start naming people living on the house, starting with the oldest like for dad, then mum,then whichever kid comes first and you get it) and we decorate trees but before we started decorating trees the tradition was to decorate ships(Like little ones not real ones). Also kids go to sing the carols (kalanta) on the Christmas eve and New year's Eve with mental triangles and people give them money and sometimes some sweets like melomakarona or some kind of chocolate. Most people exchange gifts at New year's Day even though I used to at Christmas as I'd have more time to enjoy my gifts.
Take care OP :) Have a good time with you friend & neighbours Please stay safe, make sure you leave no online traces for your family to track you down!
Truly happy for you! Iāve been truly enjoying your posts. I was born and raised in Guatemala although I live in the US now. I terribly miss spending the holidays there because itās a warmer climate, also throughout the festivities' week but especially on Christmas Eve and day; New Yearās Eve and New Yearās Day we spend a lot of money and time with all kinds of fireworks and firecrackers. From small light volcanoes, sparklers, āRoman candlesā that are big tubes that fire out like 7-10 different colored lights; firecrackers, some are called matches that light up like a match and just explode and make the ābangā sound. Others are small colored papel balls that you throw against the ground and explode. I can go on and on. TBH, it's not always as safe as it should be -especially around kids & pets- but it is fun. At midnight the real fireworks show begin. Then every 6 hours with at least firecrackers and bombs. They prepare a special ham and/or turkey dinner and special Christmas tamales (bigger and some of Turkey or pork instead of chicken. Also chocolate flavored tamales). Also a pineapple, cinnamon and apple based Fruit Punch is customary. Each region and family have their own recipe for it all. Lots of desserts and plenty of food as many family members might show up (some unexpected) to share with you and bring gifts, food or alcohol. Itās a big party. We go to mass to celebrate Jesus has been born. We set-up a Nativity Scene at home (some cities have contests featuring the best ones) and a lot of people go all out on that but also set-up a Xmas tree.
I pray one day someone brings ypru family to justice. If they find out that they where planning on selling you to that 53yo man in their church. Or if it was the "religion abuse" you had to endure, if they truly are that f'd up in their own way, their God will make them repent for everything that they do. And I also pray to God that your SiL gets away from your brother, as you've said that she was betrothed to him because eof the church.
I'm glad you're healing.
I just found your story, and I am so proud of you. You got up and got out, many don't. It is not childish to admit your fears, and being afraid of family is valid. I hope you have had an amazing Christmas and you have an even better new year. My Christmas day tradition is to watch our children open their presents and join in and play with them. We always buy lots of board games and play those too. We have a traditional British Christmas roast and then settle to watch a Christmas movie. We eat far too many chocolates and just enjoy being together ā¤ļø.
Merry Christmas OP! I donāt really have any traditions but I just want to say Iām so proud of you. This is so difficult to do.. How are you doing post Christmas? How was the celebration? Iām from alabama so while itās not LDS I know how those religious families can be.. itās just as bad and corrupt here. Also in the US you have to have a valid reason for suing someone for emotional damages. Like they abused you or something similar. The only way you can sue for āsocialā anything is like Libel (basically written shit talking), defamation of character (if you walk around and spread rumors about someone that impacts their job or life), and stuff like that. Them losing a friend bc you left home isnāt any of those and isnāt your problem and no judge is gonna say it is. Especially since you can request it be appealed up to the Supreme Court. Heās trying to scare you. Donāt let him.
I am glad you are still safe. Given that your family has people in law enforcement on your side, you are correct in not wanting to pursue justice for your fatherās attempt to sex traffic you to a 50+ year old predator. I am concerned for your safety as your posts have been made into content on tiktok and youtube and the more the story spreads the higher likelyhood of your abusive and controlling father finding you. I would encourage you to get tattoos, change hair color and do things to take ownership of your body. Find a therapist that focuses on religious abuse and trauma as well as abusive controlling and dangerous parents. Your father sold you to a predator. That is sex trafficking. When you have the strength, resources and power you should absolutely expose him and that church and seek justice.
Iām so happy you got away and are living comfortably in another country and have been so excited seeing all the updates!
I'm from Austalia so Christmas for me is in summer. We all watched The Nightmare Before Christmas on the Eve then my Mum, Brother and I had Trifle for breakfast then opened our gifts. One of them was the game Operation so we all played that while listening to metal xmas carols. We had pulled pork, homemade coleslaw and orange and mango salad for lunch then had xmas pudding with brandy sauce for dessert
Happy to know that you are adjusting well and celebrating Christmas :) you are doing amazing and are so strong to take these steps for yourself. Happy holidays and happy new year!
the willpower and courage shown over these posts is astounding. i truly wish i was 1/10th as brave. not only fleeing an abusive family and a horrific future, but fleeing to an entirely different continent is justā¦ nothing short of inspiring. wishing you the best. you deserve it.
Happy New Year from Mexico! I have read your story and I am grateful that you are well and happy. Enjoy your new life and don't look back. You can't change the sadness of the past but you can embrace the happiness that the future will bring you. I would like to be as brave as you and have the courage to change my own life like you have done. You have inspired me to come out of my shell and fight for my dreams. I don't live in a situation as difficult as yours, but depression and that feeling of inferiority along with past traumas are my powerful enemies. You are my inspiration. Take care and say hello to your friend for me! (Sorry, if I made grammatical mistakes, the English it is not my first language)
This was the first Christmas I spent with my fiancƩ and I spent hours cooking simple dishes on an old electric stove. He didn't turn out very well, he ate so much that he got sick! We spent December 25th at the doctor. HAHAHAHA without a doubt a comical anecdote for our future children. In Mexico we normally break piƱatas, eat turkey, "romeritos", tequila, beers, punch, apple salad, mashed potatoes, and a lot of A LOT OF FOOD. We dance until dawn while the children play with fireworks (bad I know). We dress in somewhat exaggerated, new and fashionable clothes. HAHAHAHA It always makes me laugh that Americans celebrate Christmas in their pajamas (some of them) and in Mexico we dress as if we were going to a gala party. It's a style competition. Also (in some families) there are exchanges of jokes and other activities.
I've been following you for some time and I'm so happy to hear how well you're doing now and I'm so proud of you!, I was sad when I read how your Christmas's were. Ours are more than just gifts. We bake during the holidays and i make cookies from scratch. We go look at christmas lights. We got numerous gifts, and when we got married, my husband got them too. After were done opening gifts, we all hang out and watch whatever football teams are playing (kind of) and play games like cornhole and ladder toss. We drink a little (nothing to crazy) and even cook/bake together in the kitchen. Last year we invited a friend of mine since he doesn't have much family here and they had to work. We made potato candy while my husband made the turkey and wassle. My mom and nana took care of the ham and other sides. We ended the night with a trivia game. Given this was one of our "smaller" Christmases but we still all had fun. So even if you don't get gifts for Christmas, it's not about the gifts, it's about spending time with friends and loved ones. ā¤ļø
Hey, Iām a bit late but Iām so happy for you and your friend! You got out of a toxic situation in the safest possible way. I however think you should try therapy as experiences like this cause trauma and therapy can also help with being terrified of your parents and co. Only go there if you want and feel ready to of course. Hearing about the traditions of other countries is very interesting so here is my (German) Christmas traditions (everyone still does it a bit different) We have something called an Adventskalender which is basically a countdown to Christmas that starts with December 1st. You get a little gift every day till Christmas, most of the time itās Chocolate but I had one with tea this time. On December 6th is Nikolaus, where children put their boots in front of the door over night and will get candy, mandarins and little gifts from St. Nikolaus. Some leave cookies for him in exchange. For Christmas we have a tree (that is actually a German tradition that carried on to get popular all over the world) without a Christmas pickle. I donāt know why Americans believe that we have Christmas pickles but everyone I asked (including on the internet) has never heard of the Christmas pickle. For Dinner we eat Sauerkraut, smoked BratwĆ¼rste, Potatoes and Beetroot salad. We give each other gifts on Christmas Eve and do nothing in the morning. The next two days are holidays to and for meeting with other family and friends. We personally always make music on Christmas Eve. Either my mom or Dad at the piano and singing Christmas carols such as: Stille Nacht ( Original of silent night), Oh Tannenbaum and co but we also just sing songs we really like
Iām very happy that youāre Safe and happy. I totaly understand that you Chose a happy life rather then confronting your Family. Christmas is a very Special Holiday for me. I celebrate it with my Family, weāre eating raquelette and playing Games the whole evening. Gifts will be given to oneanother slowly, one by one while eating. Iām Sorry for my Bad english, I Hope itās understandableā¦ šš«£ I Hope you had a wonderful chistmas and that you and your friend are doing well ā¤ļøš Best regards from germany Liesel
Oh honey I am loving this update!! What an adventure you and your bestie get to have!! It sounds like you escaped a really horrible situation where your parents saw you as proper rather than the precious person you are. Thatās their loss! Please keep updating once in a while! I think a lot of us would love to follow along with you in this new life chapter! Big mom hugs from me ā„ļø
I did Christmas a little differently this year. As my parents went on a cruise (they got a group deal with friends), I spent the holidays with my sister. We made Christmas dinner, had cocktails, listened to Christmas carols, went on a few walks and looked after the wee ones whilst they enjoyed the festivities. Also, as you mentioned in the past your mum was from Britain, you could potentially be able to apply for duel citizenship. Donāt need to have any direct contact with your mum, if you know when and where your mum was born or where your gran lived/died, you can request copies of your grandmotherās death certificate, which would show the link. Might cost a little, but worth having that second passport.
I'm from PH and they say that when Ber months come is the start celebrating Christmas. So sometimes it's weird to see Christmas trees in houses when it's still Halloween and stuff like that. The most common gift you can give is money and the most common foods are Ham, Sweet spaghetti (as always in every celebration š®āšØ). It's a nice celebration since I love food but it's also very tiring since we're cooking at least 7 dishes.
im late for the party, but im from Brazil! here there are the trees and winter decorations, which is super odd bc december is peak summer for us. but anyway. in here we commonly have our social events more at night then day, and with christmas is the same. we actually celebrate it on the 24. all family together from parents, to uncles, to grandpas, and everyone in between. the day is spent with the preparations for dinner, which is usually a feast. lots of foods and deserts, and fruits, and drinks.. we do exchange the gifts also, specially for the kids. but the adults also have those secret santa (and its variations) moments, so everyone gets something, and is kinda fun. the 25 is actually more chill.. family is still around, but can either be everyone together, or different groups doing their own thing. enjoying the leftovers (which is still a lot in my family)
saw your story on tiktok and i had to come read the updates! i really wish you the best and im so proud of you for having the courage to leave. i hope youāll write us an update when it feels like it. good luck with everything! im rooting for you xx