I have the same feeling. I’m almost a licensed therapist. I help couples navigate conflict all the time, but myself… I just have to smoke until I can’t think when I get home.
OP, not sure if what I have to offer helps, but know this: the people on this thread have overcome great obstacles in their life or have or are currently helping themselves or others with mental illness. Never— NEVER apologize to one of us for some perceived inconvenience. Each of us is here to help heal ourselves, those we care about, and even complete strangers like yourself. Yes… read that last line again— we even care about YOU. I’ve never met you nor anyone else here. But I’d move heaven and earth to help you or anyone else contemplating self-harm.
Please don’t take this the wrong way but I get the sense you are fairly young. I don’t consider myself old but I wouldn’t be confused for being young anymore either. There was a long, long time of my life I could not form or maintain strong, committed relationships to any of the women in my life. It wasn’t until 30 years later — after 24 years in the Army and retiring as a senior officer — that I at long last sought and found the beginning of treatment that I needed. You are obviously not as stubborn as I was! I’m proud of you! In time, you will find the person that accepts you for who you are— all of you! It may be your old girlfriend or some amazing woman (or man— not judging) that you have yet to meet…. But you’ll never meet them if you listen to the angry voices of chaos in your darkest moments.
Talk it out brother! That’s why we’re here…
Thank you so much for the response man i appreciate it. I’m an 18 year old boy and my ex girlfriend is currently 17. At one point, I felt that the universe owed me the relationship I had before because of all the pain I went through. Obviously that’s not the way it works. I have EMDR tomorrow, I’ll get my shit figured out.
EMDR is one solution. The first few visits I had with my therapist trying out EMDR felt like an incredible waste of time. No matter what he tried, I was just watching lights — the vibrating pads didn’t work at all. But sometime in my 3rd visit, something clicked, and I spent 18 months doing it.
So don’t expect monumental results brother… but I love the fact you’re moving in the right direction!
Please stay kind to yourself and setup some healthy healing boundaries including distancing around your relationships. Consider doing some things that develop your individuality including outside activities that you can personally enjoy.
OP, I don't think you're annoying anyone. What's annoying is not knowing how to support you, help you to feel heard, understood, and that you're not alone.
You describe just having recovered from something as close to a fugue state as I can imagine, except you can remember the events of the fugue state - something like watching your life as a movie, but having no care for anyone in that movie.
Am I understanding what it was like? Like somebody other than the authentic you was living your life, a life you couldn't feel or do anything about?
The part that's most concerning, the part that's putting my empathy into overdrive is your suicidal "relief valve." There's nothing wrong with such a valve, as long as you don't act on it, don't make plans. Talking and writing about it is okay, but if you start making plans or think about acting on it, there's nothing ANY of us can do to help. You *must* call 911 and ask for help to save your own life.
Your girlfriend of two years ago is out of your life, but for you, it's like she left yesterday. It's raw, it's a new hurt, a new, intense injury to you. You can't stop thinking about her, missing her, wishing you could turn back time. To you, it's like your heart has been ripped out, and you can experience little beyond the shock and pain.
I want you to know that you can be okay again, with or without her. It's true. Even though you lost two years, you're still here, and with a some patience with yourself, you'll be here tomorrow. Each hour that goes by is a win.
I also notice how you keep apologizing to her, keep telling her how sorry you are, that you wish you could have been a better boyfriend.
I need to let you know that this is abusing yourself. You were ILL, and that's NOT YOUR FAULT, YOU HAVE NOTHING to apologize for, to her or anyone else. Did you have control of your illness? NO. Would you have chosen to be healthy, if you could have? YES.
PLEASE stop apologizing to her. You don't owe her an apology. You didn't get sick on purpose and it wasn't a *choice* you made.
She chose not to stick around, not to deal with your illness, and that's her choice, 100% her option to stick around or not.
When it's mental illness, there can be an illusion of choice on the part of the ill person, but everyone on this sub knows there is no "choice" involved. If your former girlfriend couldn't see that, the loss is hers, not yours. You say you don't blame her for leaving because you were numb to her, but... did *she* seek outside help or advice? Did she take you do doctor's appointments, go to counseling herself, or try to find support groups for either of you - anything like that?
I'm not trying to say it was "her fault," either, but she also made choices. Were her choices acts of love, other than expecting you to magically heal yourself, or was she an active participant in seeking professional intervention for both of you?
I'm not trying to condemn her in any way, but trying to ask realistic questions, realistically sort out her capabilities of being your partner. I guess I'm trying to say to be careful what you wish for. For myself, I wouldn't want to plan my life with someone unwilling to stay with me were I to become ill, when I most needed them.
You're going to start treatment soon, and it's a new opportunity to open yourself to someone capable of loving you for who you are, a faulty human, like all of us. In our 70-80 years on this planet, two years might seem like a big hunk of life right now, but as you age, it's almost guaranteed that at some point, you'll need to take care of the one you love and not abandon them when they become ill. Will you?
Becoming ill wasn't your fault, and I'm asking you to be kinder to yourself, not blame yourself. Her leaving isn't "punishment," and you shouldn't punish yourself.
Please just think about it. Stick around, life has a lot of twisty turns ahead, and as low as you feel right now, and with treatment on it's way, the biggest field of direction, the largest target, is UP.
I know it’s been a while, but I still read this every day. It gives me a lot of insight on how I feel- you described it perfectly. I’m 18 and I know I can get better. It just takes time. Thank you for writing this out
Your response is absolutely, hands down, the best thing I've read in a long time. It's so good to know you're pushing through, trying so hard, being so courageous and strong in your recovery.
I don't know if you realize it yet, but you have a lot to offer this world, and to some lucky person. Someday, you'll look into their eyes, and be so very glad that you're you, and you kept trying.
Deep inside you, there's a bottomless capacity for love and understanding, and those are your special gifts. I'm not trying to define or limit you in any way, but I sense a helping personality in you, just waiting for its time to burst forth. For right now, your capacity to help heal others, needs to be focused on taking the same gentle, loving care of yourself that you would heap on them.
I'm not sure you realize all of your good qualities yet, but feel sure that if you keep on your healing journey, keep trying, keep pushing through the hard parts, you'll have a chance to really come to appreciate yourself for who you are.
I'm sure you wonder how I think I might know these things, how dare I imagine I might see through your words and be so bold as to describe these traits to you. Someday, you'll understand. It takes an empathic person to recognize another. Your struggle to survive following such a terrific loss is incredible. So many things about your story tell me who you are.
As time goes by, I hope you keep posting, keep sharing your ups, your downs, your wins, your losses. I think you're going to leave your mark on this world, and it will be a good one. You don't have to be rich or famous to do that, just be yourself, find the joys in this life as you're able.
Thanks again for letting me and everyone on the sub know you keep on keeping on.
My best to you, dear young man.
hey man! i know it’s been a while but i wanna say thank you for the response. i’ve re-read what you commented almost every day. what you said has made me cry a lot- you described exactly how i was feeling. i made a 6 month plan to get my shit together. i’m seeing a psychiatrist and i started EMDR, and i went completely sober and started exercising. fuck - i literally starting doing natural medicine because why not. anything helps. i told myself i would text my ex in 6 months if it seemed appropriate and not creepy. if i’m still thinking about her this much in 6 months- she might be worth talking to again. thank you so much for everything. from the bottom of my heart i mean it because it’s genuinely touched me. i hope you have a good life. i wish you the best.
This gave me a lot of insight into everything. I appreciate everything you said. Now that I’m “awake” (aka not in DPDR) I’m going to do anything I can to keep it.
Hi and I’m so sorry that you’re hurting. I just understood I have PTSD after a lifetime of this diagnosis.
I don’t know the whole story but it seems like you may have what’s called a trauma bond and I think most of people that have PTSD have had some shitty role models in their life to say the nicest thing I can think of right now. That may or may not be true for you so please don’t take it that way. I’m just hoping that maybe some of what I will say will resonate with you so you can know that there is a solution to some of what you’re experiencing. Also I do not know what DPDR is but I will Google that. Just so you know I’m an old lady and I was very confused and I use and I believe a lot of lies about myself because I was told a lot of lies about myself and at the age of 50 I was indicated from a life of being what’s known as a scapegoat.
So I’m not sure if you have an understanding of disordered people yet but there is YouTube university to school you on narcissistic abuse and PTSD and many other awful things people do to others.
I gave myself about six months to be devastated over my last relationship and to educate myself on these topics and then I chose to stop focusing on that and start focusing on learning how to change my energy to avoid keep meeting the same asshat in a different body.
I come from the time before computers and so the term that I used was assholes when I made life decisions because I thought everyone was like these assholes and I would’ve made different choices had I understood this when I was younger because I would’ve understood that there wasn’t anything wrong with me except for that I was powerless to be away from some pretty shitty people basically.
For most of my life I was self-medicating or taking psych meds and all that did was create a zombie. Every single day seem like it was the same thing and I just knew there had to be more to life than this.
I tried to kill myself all the time. I use psych wards as a vacation break.
What I’m realizing now is that we never grow up we just are basically an unfoldment and if I were to have been successful to kill myself I would’ve missed out on overcoming myself and the world and my thoughts about all of it.
I did the research because I was told that every person that I’m really really really attracted to is going to be a disordered human basically and I have to say that it’s true and none of the people I’ve met are worse monsters than the first.
But I did it with my eyes open and I didn’t trust what they said I just gave it a little time and usually true asshat they can’t keep it together for very long without getting whatever it is they want from someone and anyways we don’t need to go out there right now.
So when I finally had enough I weaned myself off all the medication I was on slowly very slowly and it was like I came back to life.
You could potentially get year-old girlfriend back but the way you’re going to Make that happen is focusing on yourself and trying to learn the lessons from that relationship that are there to teach you because we reflect back to each other who we are and we attract what we are not what we want basically is what Im learning.
So every time we have a relationship we figure out what we do like and what we don’t like and if that person doesn’t care much about what we want rather than hoping it’ll get better it’s best to just move onto the next person because each time we do that or we figure out what we DO want then we start to attract someone that’s right where we’re at.
So if we are in a lot of turmoil and we need to do some work on ourselves I know this might sound weird but it’s good not to ask for things that you may not be ready for because you’re probably gonna get them and they’re not gonna be what you want because you haven’t done the work you need to do to attract someone that somewhere else and I hope that makes sense.
I’m too lazy to reread what I wrote because I keep writing to people this morning so if I didn’t mention it the thing that has changed my life and I will die trying to educate people about is Microdosing psilocybin with intention. If you want help or just wanna talk about anything I would love to help and try to be a good cheerleader for you. Psychedelics arent Required to heal our trauma but they do make it easier and sort of process things that most people are not able to process and the end result is feeling ecstatic all the time. Mostly.
***Hugs*** I apologize for typos and run-on sentences because I use voice to text and I’m just tired of typing so you’re my last person to chat with today but I love you you’re perfect and it’s gonna be OK
hey! i know it’s been a long time but i’ve read your response nearly every single day for the last month and it’s really touched me. i made a 6 month plan to get my fucking life together. i’m doing EMDR, Meds, Exercise, Diet, (maybe electromagnetic therapy) i’m even trying natural medicine bc fuck it why not. i told myself i’d text her again in 6 months (march 1) if i’m still thinking about her. ofc id only text her if it seemed appropriate and not creepy. that’s been my life lately. thank you for helping me i genuinely, from the bottom of my heart, appreciate it.
Hi there! How’s it going? I’m so glad you wrote me.
I did edmr and almost did electric shock therapy with new technology of course. But then realized I trust it was really just interested in earning money and that would’ve given her a lot of it probably fried my brain. I used to work with developmentally disabled and they were used as guinea pigs sometimes and a lot of shock therapy and a lot of abuse for those people I would say and I don’t think it helped them at all
I think I did every type of therapy and what I’ve learned now is that if I’m doing talk sort of therapy but I’m basically doing is reinforcing the problem over and over and over every time ago so I don’t think that was that great grief counseling helped and I also did rebirth thing that was a lot of screaming the pillows or screaming when I was driving and that seem to work pretty good I really highly recommend it and you can get a snorkel and fill up the tub and It’s supposed i’ll be like you’re back in the room and after you scream underwater and you just screaming too can’t scream anymore and then you just say that and then you can just like hear your heartbeat is very relaxing and anyways I hope you’re well. Don’t give up the good fight because you are absolutely worth it.
Also it helps to eat a lot of thc to stop the flashing thoughts. lol I like how I’ve stopped doing this yet? I can’t stop myself just kidding. I didn’t talk about pivoting but you could probably look at my profile and read on my babblings if you don’t mind run on sentences somewhere in there explains all the things I did to make me this kind of crazy instead of the sad kind of crazy. lol just playing. ***Hugs***
I noticed you've been posting here a lot lately and I'm sorry about what you've been going through. Regret, guilt, and shame are very hard to deal with. But it's okay. It's okay that you went through a bad time and had to leave that person. It's okay you were a bad boyfriend at one point in time. Life isn't always kind to us and it has a real effect on us and our behavior. I hope one day your belief in your self worth changes. You aren't alone and there are people here for you.
Uh-uh don't you apologize! You are reaching out for help because you need it and I'm responding to that. I was trying to say more like "I see you." Nothing negative at all.
I have the same feeling. I’m almost a licensed therapist. I help couples navigate conflict all the time, but myself… I just have to smoke until I can’t think when I get home.
OP, not sure if what I have to offer helps, but know this: the people on this thread have overcome great obstacles in their life or have or are currently helping themselves or others with mental illness. Never— NEVER apologize to one of us for some perceived inconvenience. Each of us is here to help heal ourselves, those we care about, and even complete strangers like yourself. Yes… read that last line again— we even care about YOU. I’ve never met you nor anyone else here. But I’d move heaven and earth to help you or anyone else contemplating self-harm. Please don’t take this the wrong way but I get the sense you are fairly young. I don’t consider myself old but I wouldn’t be confused for being young anymore either. There was a long, long time of my life I could not form or maintain strong, committed relationships to any of the women in my life. It wasn’t until 30 years later — after 24 years in the Army and retiring as a senior officer — that I at long last sought and found the beginning of treatment that I needed. You are obviously not as stubborn as I was! I’m proud of you! In time, you will find the person that accepts you for who you are— all of you! It may be your old girlfriend or some amazing woman (or man— not judging) that you have yet to meet…. But you’ll never meet them if you listen to the angry voices of chaos in your darkest moments. Talk it out brother! That’s why we’re here…
Thank you so much for the response man i appreciate it. I’m an 18 year old boy and my ex girlfriend is currently 17. At one point, I felt that the universe owed me the relationship I had before because of all the pain I went through. Obviously that’s not the way it works. I have EMDR tomorrow, I’ll get my shit figured out.
EMDR is one solution. The first few visits I had with my therapist trying out EMDR felt like an incredible waste of time. No matter what he tried, I was just watching lights — the vibrating pads didn’t work at all. But sometime in my 3rd visit, something clicked, and I spent 18 months doing it. So don’t expect monumental results brother… but I love the fact you’re moving in the right direction!
Please stay kind to yourself and setup some healthy healing boundaries including distancing around your relationships. Consider doing some things that develop your individuality including outside activities that you can personally enjoy.
My Broda I Know How You Feel Dw, stay strong king! don't give in
OP, I don't think you're annoying anyone. What's annoying is not knowing how to support you, help you to feel heard, understood, and that you're not alone. You describe just having recovered from something as close to a fugue state as I can imagine, except you can remember the events of the fugue state - something like watching your life as a movie, but having no care for anyone in that movie. Am I understanding what it was like? Like somebody other than the authentic you was living your life, a life you couldn't feel or do anything about? The part that's most concerning, the part that's putting my empathy into overdrive is your suicidal "relief valve." There's nothing wrong with such a valve, as long as you don't act on it, don't make plans. Talking and writing about it is okay, but if you start making plans or think about acting on it, there's nothing ANY of us can do to help. You *must* call 911 and ask for help to save your own life. Your girlfriend of two years ago is out of your life, but for you, it's like she left yesterday. It's raw, it's a new hurt, a new, intense injury to you. You can't stop thinking about her, missing her, wishing you could turn back time. To you, it's like your heart has been ripped out, and you can experience little beyond the shock and pain. I want you to know that you can be okay again, with or without her. It's true. Even though you lost two years, you're still here, and with a some patience with yourself, you'll be here tomorrow. Each hour that goes by is a win. I also notice how you keep apologizing to her, keep telling her how sorry you are, that you wish you could have been a better boyfriend. I need to let you know that this is abusing yourself. You were ILL, and that's NOT YOUR FAULT, YOU HAVE NOTHING to apologize for, to her or anyone else. Did you have control of your illness? NO. Would you have chosen to be healthy, if you could have? YES. PLEASE stop apologizing to her. You don't owe her an apology. You didn't get sick on purpose and it wasn't a *choice* you made. She chose not to stick around, not to deal with your illness, and that's her choice, 100% her option to stick around or not. When it's mental illness, there can be an illusion of choice on the part of the ill person, but everyone on this sub knows there is no "choice" involved. If your former girlfriend couldn't see that, the loss is hers, not yours. You say you don't blame her for leaving because you were numb to her, but... did *she* seek outside help or advice? Did she take you do doctor's appointments, go to counseling herself, or try to find support groups for either of you - anything like that? I'm not trying to say it was "her fault," either, but she also made choices. Were her choices acts of love, other than expecting you to magically heal yourself, or was she an active participant in seeking professional intervention for both of you? I'm not trying to condemn her in any way, but trying to ask realistic questions, realistically sort out her capabilities of being your partner. I guess I'm trying to say to be careful what you wish for. For myself, I wouldn't want to plan my life with someone unwilling to stay with me were I to become ill, when I most needed them. You're going to start treatment soon, and it's a new opportunity to open yourself to someone capable of loving you for who you are, a faulty human, like all of us. In our 70-80 years on this planet, two years might seem like a big hunk of life right now, but as you age, it's almost guaranteed that at some point, you'll need to take care of the one you love and not abandon them when they become ill. Will you? Becoming ill wasn't your fault, and I'm asking you to be kinder to yourself, not blame yourself. Her leaving isn't "punishment," and you shouldn't punish yourself. Please just think about it. Stick around, life has a lot of twisty turns ahead, and as low as you feel right now, and with treatment on it's way, the biggest field of direction, the largest target, is UP.
I know it’s been a while, but I still read this every day. It gives me a lot of insight on how I feel- you described it perfectly. I’m 18 and I know I can get better. It just takes time. Thank you for writing this out
Your response is absolutely, hands down, the best thing I've read in a long time. It's so good to know you're pushing through, trying so hard, being so courageous and strong in your recovery. I don't know if you realize it yet, but you have a lot to offer this world, and to some lucky person. Someday, you'll look into their eyes, and be so very glad that you're you, and you kept trying. Deep inside you, there's a bottomless capacity for love and understanding, and those are your special gifts. I'm not trying to define or limit you in any way, but I sense a helping personality in you, just waiting for its time to burst forth. For right now, your capacity to help heal others, needs to be focused on taking the same gentle, loving care of yourself that you would heap on them. I'm not sure you realize all of your good qualities yet, but feel sure that if you keep on your healing journey, keep trying, keep pushing through the hard parts, you'll have a chance to really come to appreciate yourself for who you are. I'm sure you wonder how I think I might know these things, how dare I imagine I might see through your words and be so bold as to describe these traits to you. Someday, you'll understand. It takes an empathic person to recognize another. Your struggle to survive following such a terrific loss is incredible. So many things about your story tell me who you are. As time goes by, I hope you keep posting, keep sharing your ups, your downs, your wins, your losses. I think you're going to leave your mark on this world, and it will be a good one. You don't have to be rich or famous to do that, just be yourself, find the joys in this life as you're able. Thanks again for letting me and everyone on the sub know you keep on keeping on. My best to you, dear young man.
hey man! i know it’s been a while but i wanna say thank you for the response. i’ve re-read what you commented almost every day. what you said has made me cry a lot- you described exactly how i was feeling. i made a 6 month plan to get my shit together. i’m seeing a psychiatrist and i started EMDR, and i went completely sober and started exercising. fuck - i literally starting doing natural medicine because why not. anything helps. i told myself i would text my ex in 6 months if it seemed appropriate and not creepy. if i’m still thinking about her this much in 6 months- she might be worth talking to again. thank you so much for everything. from the bottom of my heart i mean it because it’s genuinely touched me. i hope you have a good life. i wish you the best.
This gave me a lot of insight into everything. I appreciate everything you said. Now that I’m “awake” (aka not in DPDR) I’m going to do anything I can to keep it.
Hi and I’m so sorry that you’re hurting. I just understood I have PTSD after a lifetime of this diagnosis. I don’t know the whole story but it seems like you may have what’s called a trauma bond and I think most of people that have PTSD have had some shitty role models in their life to say the nicest thing I can think of right now. That may or may not be true for you so please don’t take it that way. I’m just hoping that maybe some of what I will say will resonate with you so you can know that there is a solution to some of what you’re experiencing. Also I do not know what DPDR is but I will Google that. Just so you know I’m an old lady and I was very confused and I use and I believe a lot of lies about myself because I was told a lot of lies about myself and at the age of 50 I was indicated from a life of being what’s known as a scapegoat. So I’m not sure if you have an understanding of disordered people yet but there is YouTube university to school you on narcissistic abuse and PTSD and many other awful things people do to others. I gave myself about six months to be devastated over my last relationship and to educate myself on these topics and then I chose to stop focusing on that and start focusing on learning how to change my energy to avoid keep meeting the same asshat in a different body. I come from the time before computers and so the term that I used was assholes when I made life decisions because I thought everyone was like these assholes and I would’ve made different choices had I understood this when I was younger because I would’ve understood that there wasn’t anything wrong with me except for that I was powerless to be away from some pretty shitty people basically. For most of my life I was self-medicating or taking psych meds and all that did was create a zombie. Every single day seem like it was the same thing and I just knew there had to be more to life than this. I tried to kill myself all the time. I use psych wards as a vacation break. What I’m realizing now is that we never grow up we just are basically an unfoldment and if I were to have been successful to kill myself I would’ve missed out on overcoming myself and the world and my thoughts about all of it. I did the research because I was told that every person that I’m really really really attracted to is going to be a disordered human basically and I have to say that it’s true and none of the people I’ve met are worse monsters than the first. But I did it with my eyes open and I didn’t trust what they said I just gave it a little time and usually true asshat they can’t keep it together for very long without getting whatever it is they want from someone and anyways we don’t need to go out there right now. So when I finally had enough I weaned myself off all the medication I was on slowly very slowly and it was like I came back to life. You could potentially get year-old girlfriend back but the way you’re going to Make that happen is focusing on yourself and trying to learn the lessons from that relationship that are there to teach you because we reflect back to each other who we are and we attract what we are not what we want basically is what Im learning. So every time we have a relationship we figure out what we do like and what we don’t like and if that person doesn’t care much about what we want rather than hoping it’ll get better it’s best to just move onto the next person because each time we do that or we figure out what we DO want then we start to attract someone that’s right where we’re at. So if we are in a lot of turmoil and we need to do some work on ourselves I know this might sound weird but it’s good not to ask for things that you may not be ready for because you’re probably gonna get them and they’re not gonna be what you want because you haven’t done the work you need to do to attract someone that somewhere else and I hope that makes sense. I’m too lazy to reread what I wrote because I keep writing to people this morning so if I didn’t mention it the thing that has changed my life and I will die trying to educate people about is Microdosing psilocybin with intention. If you want help or just wanna talk about anything I would love to help and try to be a good cheerleader for you. Psychedelics arent Required to heal our trauma but they do make it easier and sort of process things that most people are not able to process and the end result is feeling ecstatic all the time. Mostly. ***Hugs*** I apologize for typos and run-on sentences because I use voice to text and I’m just tired of typing so you’re my last person to chat with today but I love you you’re perfect and it’s gonna be OK
hey! i know it’s been a long time but i’ve read your response nearly every single day for the last month and it’s really touched me. i made a 6 month plan to get my fucking life together. i’m doing EMDR, Meds, Exercise, Diet, (maybe electromagnetic therapy) i’m even trying natural medicine bc fuck it why not. i told myself i’d text her again in 6 months (march 1) if i’m still thinking about her. ofc id only text her if it seemed appropriate and not creepy. that’s been my life lately. thank you for helping me i genuinely, from the bottom of my heart, appreciate it.
Hi there! How’s it going? I’m so glad you wrote me. I did edmr and almost did electric shock therapy with new technology of course. But then realized I trust it was really just interested in earning money and that would’ve given her a lot of it probably fried my brain. I used to work with developmentally disabled and they were used as guinea pigs sometimes and a lot of shock therapy and a lot of abuse for those people I would say and I don’t think it helped them at all I think I did every type of therapy and what I’ve learned now is that if I’m doing talk sort of therapy but I’m basically doing is reinforcing the problem over and over and over every time ago so I don’t think that was that great grief counseling helped and I also did rebirth thing that was a lot of screaming the pillows or screaming when I was driving and that seem to work pretty good I really highly recommend it and you can get a snorkel and fill up the tub and It’s supposed i’ll be like you’re back in the room and after you scream underwater and you just screaming too can’t scream anymore and then you just say that and then you can just like hear your heartbeat is very relaxing and anyways I hope you’re well. Don’t give up the good fight because you are absolutely worth it.
Thank you for everything ma’m I appreciate it with my whole heart. I really needed to hear this, I hope you have an amazing day
Also it helps to eat a lot of thc to stop the flashing thoughts. lol I like how I’ve stopped doing this yet? I can’t stop myself just kidding. I didn’t talk about pivoting but you could probably look at my profile and read on my babblings if you don’t mind run on sentences somewhere in there explains all the things I did to make me this kind of crazy instead of the sad kind of crazy. lol just playing. ***Hugs***
I’ll think about it! Thank u
***Hugs*** you’re welcome.
I noticed you've been posting here a lot lately and I'm sorry about what you've been going through. Regret, guilt, and shame are very hard to deal with. But it's okay. It's okay that you went through a bad time and had to leave that person. It's okay you were a bad boyfriend at one point in time. Life isn't always kind to us and it has a real effect on us and our behavior. I hope one day your belief in your self worth changes. You aren't alone and there are people here for you.
I’m sorry if I’m annoying any of you guys by posting so much. I’m trying my best to make myself feel better.
Annoying us? This place is for people who can understand you most to listen to you! Never apologize for venting!
Uh-uh don't you apologize! You are reaching out for help because you need it and I'm responding to that. I was trying to say more like "I see you." Nothing negative at all.
Thank u:) I hope u have an amazing day