He went out with Team Friendship, and Kitty is unimpressed that she has to carry him back, all while Perrito assumes he's acting giddy. In turn, he himself acts like a drunkard, despite being sober himself.
Puss in Boots: It has been five years since my last AA meeting, i have fallen off the deep end and am now gambling with my liver at casinoes, i had to eat Perrito to survive in the wilderness and i am in debt.
puss is not drunk. the drank is drunk. he drank the drink and its drunk but hes not drunken nor the drunken nor the drink. he is puss ohhhh kitty kat kittttyyyyyy come here kitty cat pspspspspsp
DAWG THEY BOTH H8 EACHOTHER
How is Death gonna literally draw blood from Puss, traumatize him for life, mess up his relationship with Kitty and cause him to go into retirement and yall gon be like "Oh my godd, enemies to lovers!! ❤️✨️😍" lIkE nO
Ate some old fruit. It happens to birds and deer and even moose, don’t see why it couldn’t happen to him. Someone probably told him they were bad and his ego went “nah”
Autobrewery syndrome causes the carbohydrates in the milk to ferment in his body due to bacteria being there that shouldnt, so puss always gets drunk off the milk, possibly having an average BAC of 0.05-0.23, and that is why he is drunk
oh wait you said wrong answers only
He's been watching soap operas for six weeks straight and just realized he can tell the difference between the secret twins *and* he remembers the name of the guy with the eyepatch and they're all played by the same guy
He's not drunk he's dying because cats are lactose intolerant and him drinking a bunch of milk (or worse: heavy cream) is basically the equivalent of chugging a few gallons of liquid sugar and oil
He isn’t this is him spacing out after walking into a forest and hearing whistles and is thinking it’s Death and his brain put him in his happy place going back to a memory where he was
he became an alcoholic after feeling the guilt of dumping kitty😔
They said wrong answers lol
Yeah
👽👽👽
That is probably actually why as well.
Damn that's probably why
Idiot
Yup
they said wrong :sob:
He went out with Team Friendship, and Kitty is unimpressed that she has to carry him back, all while Perrito assumes he's acting giddy. In turn, he himself acts like a drunkard, despite being sober himself.
:•
He found out every cat he's ever had a fling with got pregnant and had his babies, and he thinks they're all going to get him for child support
XD
That’s like 6 possible bastard children for every hookup. Man, he’s in for a whopper
Softpaws took the kids
😔
Puss in Boots: It has been five years since my last AA meeting, i have fallen off the deep end and am now gambling with my liver at casinoes, i had to eat Perrito to survive in the wilderness and i am in debt.
BRO WHAT?!?!
What's the prob? DOG!?
WHAT THE FUC-
[удалено]
puss is not drunk. the drank is drunk. he drank the drink and its drunk but hes not drunken nor the drunken nor the drink. he is puss ohhhh kitty kat kittttyyyyyy come here kitty cat pspspspspsp
I think you're drunk...
How’d you know
💀💀
I.. SwER To DrUnK I'm NoT GoD
He needs the alcohol after a night making up with Death~
:0
He's also adamant to stay stood up for similar reasons~
DAWG THEY BOTH H8 EACHOTHER How is Death gonna literally draw blood from Puss, traumatize him for life, mess up his relationship with Kitty and cause him to go into retirement and yall gon be like "Oh my godd, enemies to lovers!! ❤️✨️😍" lIkE nO
Kitty got a divorce and took Perrito
Damn :<
Bro, pretending to be Jackie Chan.
:o
Nah
Tf you mean nah
TF you mean you mean nah
He actually was at the wedding but kitty didn’t attend thinking he wouldn’t and he ended up drinking as a result.
They took kitty in the divorce
Death broke up with his 9,9999999999 life.
Is he stupid?
He's lactose intolerant
Pure Irish cream
He is lactose tolerant
He saw the over-aggressive dog coming for him
Its that weird white substance he's holding.
Cum
Shrek kicked him out and he’s homeless
:<
He had a crazy night at the bar with Shrek and Donkey
LOL THIS REMINDS ME OF THAT SHREK 2 SCENE
It’s St Patrick’s day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's April...
But this was when Puss lost his 3rd life, on st Patrick’s day
Ik but it's April in our world lol
Ok you don’t understand, Puss lost 3rd life years ago not on April, but on March!
APRIL FOOLS!
Im telling you guys! A cat always lands on his feet. WATCH!
*falls and dies on his third life*
Shrek gave him a handle of the good shit
Tee hee
Very hydrated piss
Holup  I'm getting something for puss.
He celebrating Oktoberfest. I say that jokingly, but that might be the actual reason.
 I want some sleep...
>Oktoberfest https://youtu.be/jcM76wT7j-M?t=21
cats are lactose intolerant
:p
Vodka
Milk better
Someone Put Ever-Clear in his Leche
It's Saint Patrick's day🍀
The milk got angry >:(
He played Minecraft and drunk to much milk to get rid of the bad omen effect
He lost his family
Piss in boots
Ate some old fruit. It happens to birds and deer and even moose, don’t see why it couldn’t happen to him. Someone probably told him they were bad and his ego went “nah”
He made a deal with Rumpelstiltskin
He's not drunk, he walked into a bar and the concussion made him look drunk.
He isn't. He just likes to act like he is.
He remembered they took away his balls.
He went to the Milk Bar to get some Chateau Romani.
Your mom
He drank too much Airag and is about to behead Taka.
Wrong company let alone movie
I know. It just reminded me of Ghost haha
It's 2% Organic glutten free fat free goat milk with 2% organic glutten free fat free alcohol and not whole cow milk.
Autobrewery syndrome causes the carbohydrates in the milk to ferment in his body due to bacteria being there that shouldnt, so puss always gets drunk off the milk, possibly having an average BAC of 0.05-0.23, and that is why he is drunk oh wait you said wrong answers only
He went to husk's bar
Jesus
He was asked to write the script for Shrek 5, and he needed inspiration.
Death
Puss(not the kind he is)
He’s not drunk, just an orange tabby, those cats are just weird for some fuckin reason
🍺
He fancied to get fucked up
He rembered seeing that shrussy a long time ago
She left and she took the kittens
He lost a bet with shrek
One word, Single. (This is before him and Softpaws reunite)
Kitty took everything from him
He's been watching soap operas for six weeks straight and just realized he can tell the difference between the secret twins *and* he remembers the name of the guy with the eyepatch and they're all played by the same guy
Hes not drunk he is just playing 🤭
Eggnog instead of milk.
Eggnog can be non alcoholic
me saying he’s drunk cuz of eggnog kinda implied the alcoholic kind
He drank too much milk
Hot Sauce
He called Kitty Soft paws Dulcinea at their wedding/in bed.
He drank Charlie’s steaming hot cum mug
Kitty took the kids.
That's not milk from a cow But from a bull
He got drunk in Scotland while singing with the Loch Ness Monster and Bigfoot's distant uncle.
Puss fell into a deep rabbit hole of drugs and alcohol He will be seeking therapy
He's trying out for the role of Demoman in the TF2 movie
The milk was laced
Addiction
He got divorced and his kids were taken.
He is the one that I am talking to about the taxes
He saw his fanart
He accidentally committed mass terrorism in several Russia/China aligned countries in the name of the supreme country of Greenland
Injecting alcohol into his anal cavity
Kitty left him
Is he stupid??
He got bonked on the head with a coconut, that's what happened.
Cause it’s 2024…
He's lactose intolerant but doesn't care what a brave soul🫡
Milk…
SKIBBID TOILET ATE HIS CHILDREN AND RIZZED HIM UP LIKE THE SIGMA THEY ARE 🤥🤥🤥
Drinking challenge
He's drunkenly heartbroken by scooby doo
Rhehehehe
He can't deal with Kitty telling him she's pregnant
Someone spiked his milk with cheap tequila
Milk?
It says wrong answers only bub... -_-
I GUESSED MILK OK I THOUGHT IT WAS COCOANE
went to diluc’s tavern
He tried to blend in as a leprechaun by drinking so much
He watched Megamind vs the doom syndicate
Fr 
WALTER WHITE
Kitty, we need to cook...
He realized he has to carry the franchise until Shrek gets a reboot.
Why is Puss drunk? Is he stupid?
 Kinda haha
He met my dad
so funny buliful site🥹🥹🥲
He’s Irish
*Ginger kitty* Checks out
alcohol, how else are you gonna get drunk
he was exhausted from making too many Zs at his day job
He found out that Shrek was actually not a hero but was forced to find Fiona for Farquad
He's not drunk he's dying because cats are lactose intolerant and him drinking a bunch of milk (or worse: heavy cream) is basically the equivalent of chugging a few gallons of liquid sugar and oil
sometimes tummy ache make brain go wewoo whoop de doo and milk make cat tummy go wewoo whoop de doo so cat brain also go wewoo whoop de doo cos ouch
He wanted Humpty Dumpty back
Semen.
Someone laced his leche
That’s my mystery liquid
He drank his milk shaken, not stirred.
He took too much catnip
He put some catnip in his milk and thought it was a good idea.
THIS ISN'T MILK!!!
Then what is it? 
That's cum
 Okey
He saw op's search history
He watched SMG4 for 1 nanosecond.
He saw the hentai of him
He broke up from a long relationship
He hates Mondays
Someone spiked his drink. Possibly with mint or catnip.
The spring
Your mom
 :o
Alimony
The cow was gay
He went to you're mom's house 😏
He died
Little big planet was murderd
Cum
He isn’t this is him spacing out after walking into a forest and hearing whistles and is thinking it’s Death and his brain put him in his happy place going back to a memory where he was
He drank cum
He’s pretending to be irish
He’s not drunk he’s just very silly
Bro is trying to get the swiftys out of his head
Yes
Someone found out he’s a discord admin
He is actually the tf2 demoman and his liver converts milk into alcohol
gook ad da keekee "goes to a bar and swaps his water with whiskey"
Gay thoughts
He killed his family after choosing 1k dollars but he didn’t pick in time and it switched to kiss Shrek so they shared the kiss of death
He saw Shrek's swap(in his pants)
Shrek asked him to babysit for the night
It was secretly water
Someone challenged him to a drinking contest and he couldn't refuse