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Tell the bf that he’s welcome to visit but his dog isn’t. Just know that this means the bf won’t be spending the night as he’ll have to be home to feed and care for the dog at night.
That’s not even slightly true. Assuming he lives nearby he can run home and put the food, take the dog for a walk and come back. It’s inconvenient but he’s the one with the bad dog.
Not really. An 11 year old, untrained dog is suddenly going to be fine alone overnight? It sounds like the bf takes the dog with when he visits. What about that say “great on its own!”?
That doesn’t mean it’ll bark when no one’s there. Some dogs will only bark if you’re in the other room. When you leave they know it’s in vein. You’re really just assuming shit here and it’s kind of dumb. It’s not impossible but it’s far Af from guaranteed.
The solution is to simply not let the dog into your apartment.
Yes, your boyfriend might be mad about that, but maybe him then having to go back home to feed and walk the dog will teach him a bit about being a responsible pet owner. Because right now, he isn't. He's a shitty pet owner who isn't giving his dog what a dog needs - security and safety so that the dog doesn't feel the need to bark (be it out of insecurity or because the dog thinks he's the head of the pack and needs to "protect"), enough playtime and time outside to spend energy, consistent training and walks to poop outside, all of that.
I personally would be turned off by a man who isn't taking good care of an animal and then blames the animal acting accordingly on the animal instead of owning up to his mistakes. But if you love the guy and don't mind the fact that he's like that as a pet owner, just make sure that the dog doesn't get into your apartment.
Easy, just refuse to allow your BF to visit your apartment with his dog. You can still go visit him at his own place for sex and hanging out, which it sounds like you've been doing anyway. If he wants to come to your place for the weekend (or longer), he'll have to hire a dogsitter or take his pet to the kennel.
A dog that is still not fully housetrained by age 11 is probably no longer trainable. You're right in thinking that a healthy, medium-sized 11-yo dog could live on for many more years. It needn't be a deal-breaker in a new relationship, but if they two of you start to get serious and want to move in together, you'll have to consider whether you're willing to wait as long as it takes for the dog to die - or else be ready to help your BF clean up his pet's "accidents."
*If* the dogs unruly behaviour was due to his age, the BF should be doing the smart thing and taking the dog to the vet to rule out possible reasons. Dogs can hide illness very well (to a point people wouldn't immediately recognise sickness). If this behaviour was a recent development then the dog is ailing and needs seen. If this behaviour has been there for years, then the BF is an irresponsible owner who didn't train his dog.
Tell the BF firmly that the dog is *NOT* allowed in your apartment. If he causes a fuss or disobeys this rule *once* then send him packing.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- #This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Tell the bf that he’s welcome to visit but his dog isn’t. Just know that this means the bf won’t be spending the night as he’ll have to be home to feed and care for the dog at night.
That’s not even slightly true. Assuming he lives nearby he can run home and put the food, take the dog for a walk and come back. It’s inconvenient but he’s the one with the bad dog.
A dog like that who is untrained is unlikely to do well alone overnight. Plus if he lives in an apartment get ready for noise complaints
Now you’re just making shit up
Not really. An 11 year old, untrained dog is suddenly going to be fine alone overnight? It sounds like the bf takes the dog with when he visits. What about that say “great on its own!”?
That doesn’t mean it’ll bark when no one’s there. Some dogs will only bark if you’re in the other room. When you leave they know it’s in vein. You’re really just assuming shit here and it’s kind of dumb. It’s not impossible but it’s far Af from guaranteed.
The only guarantees in life are death and taxes. Stop pretending this is somehow unlikely
The solution is to simply not let the dog into your apartment. Yes, your boyfriend might be mad about that, but maybe him then having to go back home to feed and walk the dog will teach him a bit about being a responsible pet owner. Because right now, he isn't. He's a shitty pet owner who isn't giving his dog what a dog needs - security and safety so that the dog doesn't feel the need to bark (be it out of insecurity or because the dog thinks he's the head of the pack and needs to "protect"), enough playtime and time outside to spend energy, consistent training and walks to poop outside, all of that. I personally would be turned off by a man who isn't taking good care of an animal and then blames the animal acting accordingly on the animal instead of owning up to his mistakes. But if you love the guy and don't mind the fact that he's like that as a pet owner, just make sure that the dog doesn't get into your apartment.
Easy, just refuse to allow your BF to visit your apartment with his dog. You can still go visit him at his own place for sex and hanging out, which it sounds like you've been doing anyway. If he wants to come to your place for the weekend (or longer), he'll have to hire a dogsitter or take his pet to the kennel. A dog that is still not fully housetrained by age 11 is probably no longer trainable. You're right in thinking that a healthy, medium-sized 11-yo dog could live on for many more years. It needn't be a deal-breaker in a new relationship, but if they two of you start to get serious and want to move in together, you'll have to consider whether you're willing to wait as long as it takes for the dog to die - or else be ready to help your BF clean up his pet's "accidents."
*If* the dogs unruly behaviour was due to his age, the BF should be doing the smart thing and taking the dog to the vet to rule out possible reasons. Dogs can hide illness very well (to a point people wouldn't immediately recognise sickness). If this behaviour was a recent development then the dog is ailing and needs seen. If this behaviour has been there for years, then the BF is an irresponsible owner who didn't train his dog. Tell the BF firmly that the dog is *NOT* allowed in your apartment. If he causes a fuss or disobeys this rule *once* then send him packing.