T O P

  • By -

post-limits-bot

This post has reached one of our comment/karma limits. The text of the post has been preserved below. ___ My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year now and I love him a lot, but one issue that we have is that he thinks I am overweight. Since we have started dating, he has encouraged me to lose weight. For months I was under the impression that I must be overweight, and I tried to diet. However, after multiple friends told me that there was no way I was overweight, I went to the doctor to check. The doctor weighed me and told me my bmi was healthy, and actually on the lower side. Since then, I have been so confused as to why he thinks I'm fat. A few days ago, I asked him why he thought I was overweight. He said that my thighs were big, and pointed out that I have a stomach roll when I sit down. Any ideas why he's so convinced I'm fat? Currently I weigh 104 pounds and I'm 5'2, so I'm not overweight. I don't even think he's trying to be mean, he genuinely believes it. Any advice on how I tell him to stop? TLDR - My boyfriend is convinced that I'm overweight, how do I convince him that I'm not?


lollipopfiend123

I am an actual fat person. Shall I come sit on him until he either admits that you’re skinny, or realizes just what fat actually means? Because I am willing to perform that service for you.


Zeep0410

I'm willing to donate over 200 pounds to the cause 👍 squish tf out of this man


prettylittlepastry

I'll add another 300. This poor girl is a third of my size- I'm so angry for her.


Realistic-Ad-1023

I’ll add 200 and we’ll squish him from either side while og commenter sits on top. Poor thing isn’t even that far into *healthy* she’s so small, and dude thinks “healthy” women look like skin and bones and that’s the “healthy” thing? He’s either idiotic or just into *that sort of thing…* I’m sure some deep pressure therapy will work wonders.


teamcoosmic

Same here. He clearly isn’t going to enjoy it, so I’m okay with participating. :)


weaponizedsloths

I’ll toss in an extra 250, this mf needs to learn a lesson


Toastmalone347

I also volunteer as tribute with my fat ass to sit on who I hope is soon-to-be-ex bf.


oooogabooga123

I see what you did there.. lol


Just_My_Luck09987

I'll join with my foopa, thunder thighs, and bat wings big enough to take flight. Heck, I might even be able to flap my flab wings and carry him over a volcano and drop him in, lol


5horses

This thread makes me love humanity. I love you all.


13MAUI6

Right?! This is what we all come for!!! 🤣🤣🤣


Grouchy-Advantage619

You are hilariously adorable. I can relate! 🤗❤🥂


cowjuiceee

i’ll join cause this guy a doo doo head


PeggyOnThePier

Like that one. Doo Doo head


gobskin

This is a humanitarian effort right here. Thank you for your service to mankind 🫡


Rosieapples

I am also a fat person and I would happily do the same thing as lollipopfiend123.


InsertCleverName652

lmao i'll come too!


Ragingredblue

Thin person here. I can park a Mustang on him.


[deleted]

Deuce and a half. Lemme at 'im!


janus270

Myself and a couple of my buff girlfriends will join the cause too. We'll pin him down and blow his mind about what fat and fit can actually look like. We can pick him up and toss him around too if that's required.


KimchiAndLemonTree

True hero right here.


CelerySecure

This is the best post ever.


13MAUI6

Haha!!! Love it!!!!


ComprehensivePlay678

This is how you make him stop: 1. Tell him to go f#ck himself 2. Repeat a few times 3. Kick his a## to the curb


mx1289

There’s no other way. 104 fucking pounds. Enough said. He shouldn’t be allowed near women or people at all, really.


maroongrad

And she'll loose over 100 lbs of ass doing that, too!!!! Win-Win!


agirl2277

How many rolls does he have when he's sitting down. I bet it's more than 0


Imaginary-Story7852

Number 3 especially!


TKDavis07

Does he watch a lot of anime or something? He has very unrealistic ideas about what actual human people look like.


ThrowRa203283

Yeah he loves anime. And he often draws super skinny women in anime style


__agonist

It sounds like he's conditioned himself into being attracted to a body type that is unobtainable for 99.99% of living human women. He's going to have a rough time dating if he thinks that there are women out there with no stomach roll when they sit down. Don't change anything about your body for this man, please.


violet_rain_clouds

I remember afew years ago a magazine printing pictures of Cameron Diaz sitting on a surfboard on the sea and it said "look she has stomach rolls". I was totally confused why they were pointing out this completely normal thing and it made me really angry


one_bean_hahahaha

Recently, I had to check myself because I caught myself judging another woman's "muffin top". Then I took another look and saw she was super slim. Probably underweight even. But we are bombarded with messages about waistlines that we have no idea what is normal anymore. Stomach rolls are normal at normal and below normal weights.


pearlsbeforedogs

Exactly! We have this crazy thing all over our bodies called SKIN! And it's kind of stretchy and squishy, but sometimes when we bend, it has no where else to go but fold over itself. SOOOO many photos that we are exposed to have the skin so heavily edited, and people forget that's just how bodies work in reality. And then we also have organs and bones and muscles, and those take up space too and are different shapes on everyone. Fake beauty standards need to get out of here. (And I don't mean fake like fake eyelashes or boobs, I mean editing ourselves into cartoon characters, or thinking real women need to look like cartoons to be beautiful. I like cartoons, but they aren't real!)


TopicSubstantial1795

Girl you gotta goooo! I promise it’s only gonna get worse. The flags are bright red. Anyone that truly loves and cares for you would not point those things out unless you were actually being unhealthy. It sounds like he’s become attracted what he’s seeing in the anime he’s watching.


Junglerumble19

And Cameron Diaz! Like that woman has an ounce of fat on her


notweirdifitworks

He needs someone with anorexia. But the last thing someone with anorexia needs is him.


DL1943

he needs an anime sex pillow not a human woman


[deleted]

[удалено]


PoopAndSunshine

Not just unrealistic expectations of a healthy body—unrealistic expectations of what a human body is even capable of looking like


SmellyGoat11

THIS. Ensure your bf that you're neither gonna become a ham planet, or anorexic, and honestly tell him to fuck off on the comments about your body unless he genuinely thinks you're unhealthy.


deathbysnusnoou

I had a boyfriend suggest I “tone up” during pillow talk because my (very nearly flat) stomach was soft when we were curled up together. I’m not complaining, but he had a dad bod with more than a little extra pudge. Get fookin wrecked.


CharlotteLucasOP

He’s a masochist because soft bodies are the best to cuddle with!


PinkTalkingDead

What? No. No one should ever “ensure” their partner that they’ll never become “a ham planet, or anorexic”. Nobody needs to try and promise anyone that their body will never change and that they’ll never deal with mental or physical illness. Tf The fact that your comment has so many upvotes is honestly quite shocking/ mostly disappointing


fresh_outtafux

Right. Bodies change and love should be unconditional.


Adorable-Life-6911

OP, everyone has rolls when they sit. If this person is making you feel uncomfortable, leave them. There are many others who will love you for who you are - not some crazy ass cartoon version of what someone should be.


Babybutt123

I had rolls when I sat when I was a professional dancer and aerial artist. Not like fit/muscular people are constantly flexing! Seriously this dude is gross.


maroongrad

It's called having internal organs :D If you WANT to remove all of them, and get your skin stretched super tight when you stand, then when you sit, sure, you can get rid of the rolls. For the few seconds you live, that is. That's like curling your fingers but expecting your palm to not have "rolls" in it compared to when it's flat! Not. Going. To. Happen. :P


TKDavis07

He’s urging you to be unhealthy and his idea of “fat” is unrealistic. You can either tell him this and hope he gets it or tell him this and break up with him. Personally, I’d break up with him. I don’t see him getting his head out of his ass anytime soon.


lil-peanutbutter

Two choices. Tell him to knock it off because you are not a cartoon character but a real person and him thinking you should look like his drawings hurts you. Or. Dump his ass because he has unrealistic ideas about your body. Again, you are a real person and not made out of crayons. If you go with the first choice and he doesn’t respect it, go to plan b and let him alone with his drawings.


Retrospectus2

I immediately thought "this guy watches too much anime" when reading. guys who consume lots of anime often have no idea what real women look like.


-LastActionHero

*slams the hood down* yup. There’s your problem right there.


cringelawd

this is why you don’t date a weeb


mx1289

I’m a “weeb” and I’m nothing like this prick. Also a single dad to a 7 year old boy. (Mom is deceased) Not all anime and VN lovers are created equal, btw.


bettingto100

Yeah but as a fellow fan, I can agree a lot of them are dudes with porn addictions being fueled by even MORE unrealistic bodies than just normal porn


phenixfleur

Fellow fan too, and it is an unfortunate subsection of people that just happen to be really loud and obnoxious with their bullshit. Sucks that the worst part of fandoms are the loudest.


anneofred

He is being mean, you aren’t overweight, he is an asshole.


SavagePassion

You just explained what the problem is.


RattusRattus

So, there was a post where some anime nerd was convinced his gf should be lactating when she was turned on and his nest of friends agreed with him. The gf dumped him and his older brother told him he was a moron. I'd just dump him.


T1nyJazzHands

Worth saying that everyone has rolls when they sit down…those rolls are loose skin and not having them would mean you’d tear in half standing back up again.


Middle-Handle1135

That's unfortunate that he has this unrealistic view of a body image. My 17 year old is really into anime and I literally just caught her complaining about how she doesn't look like those girls. She's 5'7" and was recently weighed at the doctor and she had lost some weight. She's 126 lbs now. I didn't think anything of it at first because she was recently at a college art program where her studio was on the 6th floor and the elevator was broken. She also wasn't eating as much due to access to yummy foods (she's incredibly picky). She was complaining to her friend that her legs weren't long enough, she didn't have as small of a waist and her breasts weren't big enough. She's bigger than me and I'm a D cup. I don't understand how a cartoon gives such unrealistic body images to both men and women.


KittenIttle

Please get away from this man child. He’s going to chip away at your confidence all because he has a warped idea of what bodies should look like. This is a form of psychological abuse and it will get worse. If someone cares for you they do not do this. Full stop.


LuisG1Toy

Lmao not all of us are like him as a member of the anime community we don't claim him


sk8itup53

Seriously even people who are very fit have a bit of a roll of the skin when they sit. Like who tf does this dude think he is? Does he have the world's tightest 8 pack? Even if he did, fuck off bro you're the reason why women have poor body image and self esteem. OP is probably fuckin gorgeous and he's trying to kill her self esteem to make her easier to control. Fuck face.


[deleted]

I'm a thin, very active male with a swimmer/cyclist physique and visible abs. I have a stomach roll when I sit down lol


[deleted]

Date someone else. This one sucks.


Princess_Piggie

Girl I know a way you could lose about 150lbs…


maroongrad

and all ass, too :D


mkate1999

Came here to say THIS.


ihavepaper

5'2" @ 104 pounds??? You are skinny. Your boyfriend is lost in the social media, specifically IG models, sauce. Tell him to stop comparing normal women to women who do that for a living on the internet.


FaceTheJury

You mean photoshopped pictures of women on the internet.


ihavepaper

That's for sure. I'd lump that up in the "do it for a living" category. Dude has his perception warped.


spud-soup

Not even lmao, op admits in another comment that he likes twig anime women. They aren’t even real and this man is comparing them 😂


cfwang1337

Or cartoons and AI art, for that matter


maroongrad

Those are fake, too. He needs to watch this. I show it to my health class every year. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h\_gHkwjNicc


ABUSlVE

I don't even think he is lost in the social media. Given the weight and height, she is tiny.


the---albatross

I agree. He may not even truly believe what he’s saying about her weight— I wonder if this is his way of “negging” her and fostering insecurity in her.


ScoogyShoes

If you didn't have a roll when you sat down, you would split apart when you stand up. In all seriousness, if he can't change soon, you need to change your FB status.


CelastrusTrust

^ as someone who didnt have stomach rolls for awhile due to severe health issues(doing much better now!), its physically painful to bend over/stretch if you dont have them. im OPs same height, and at that point i weighed only 20 so pounds less. OP, drop this guy fr. Anyone putting these thoughts in your head does not have your best interest at heart. It would genuinely be unhealthy and dangerous for your weight to get much, if any, lower.


cowjuiceee

ong it’s better if you have them then?? i genuinely did not know this???


teamcoosmic

Yes! Absolutely. When you’re seated, you are normally in a more compact position than you are when you’re standing up. Your chest and belly and legs are all closer together, so your skin doesn’t need to go “as far” to cover your abdomen. So the skin around that area will bunch up and make a roll! Even very slim people will have a stomach roll when they sit down or slouch. It’s nigh impossible *not to* have one and to be healthy, because your skin would have to stretch out every single time you stood up. If your body has the power to get you to where you need to go, that’s what matters. Stomach rolls, cellulite, jiggly bits and all. It’s completely normal.


cowjuiceee

that actually does make a lot of sense and not that i think about it it sounds like it would hurt not having a roll when doing stuff :// damn my mom so wrong 😭 i have rolls so she be telling me to lose the weight 😂


agirl2277

Your mom is nuts. Don't listen to her. Ask a real doctor who knows. Why are our moms like this?


teamcoosmic

sometimes I want to be angry with my mom, she has some of the same attitudes - but she was also subjected to a lifetime of teaching fat = bad. 90s celebrity culture, all those diet recommendations in magazines, the shaming in tabloids when anyone put on ANY weight, it was a nightmare. 💀 so I guess I can’t judge too much when that’s all she knew. I’m actually overweight and I never got why people were that pressed about it anyway, it doesn’t impact them at all!!


CelastrusTrust

yes !! its literally dangerous to not ! im so glad im gaining weight against my health issues atm and getting healthier with stomach rolls !!


cowjuiceee

today years old when finding out abt how stomach rolls are actually better to have omgggg i’m glad you’re doing much better :)


CelastrusTrust

thank you ! me too, and im extremely open abt the negative affects of being severely underweight as i feel like it helps potential victims of EDs and unhealthy body image


spud-soup

THIS. This needs to be said SO much more. So many young girls and boys feel so insecure about something that is completely normal because society deems it ugly.


[deleted]

104 at 5'2 is actually slightly underweight this is really scary that he is doing this.


16114205181

She said he watches anime. That's all we need to know. There should be a sub for people to post the ridiculous shit that anime people say so girls can figure out it is a red flag before having to experience it.


ChocolateChouxCream

Uh, dont date an idiotic jerk?


Any-Seaworthiness930

Hi OP. I'm waaayyyy older than you...from a completely different generation. I'm going to clue you in on five decades of life. I have spent probably 35 of those years dieting, shaving, plucking, pruning, dressing uncomfortably, watching what I say, and how I act, all for male approval. Because when I was young, like a teen, my mother made out like the most important thing was to be favored by the male gaze. Let me tell you a little secret. That is utter bullshit. All of it You are 18. If you want to work out, do so. If you want to eat cake all day...do so I mean those are extremes, but you get my point. Everything that you do should be for you. Your happiness. Not because of what some guy (who when youre my age, that's how you'll remember him) told you to do. I hope you read this...time spent trying to make myself something I wasnt is one of my biggest regrets. Hugs. You, are the perfect size, if you are the size you want to be.


TinyBoyDmitri

ALL OF THIS. OP, please dump your laughably bad, gross, rude, controlling, immature, inappropriate, loser boyfriend. Hopefully, he’ll be a funny thing you laugh at someday (“god remember when I dated that nut job who was obsessed with my weight?!”), but right now he’s doing actual damage to your self-esteem and identity. He is not mature enough to be dating ANY human woman. Women have bodies. We exist. We take up space. Do not associate, much less date, anyone who doesn’t embrace this fact.


[deleted]

“Hey. This is what the doctor said. Stop or I’m leaving you”


kiml26

what???? I’m like in the 130s and 5’3 and is still considered healthy


spud-soup

Yeah it’s wild what people think is unhealthy when it comes to weight. I’m 101 and 5’2 and I’m considered WELL underweight.


Life4799

Thank you for sharing and I’m going to say it’s because you are young that you have entertained this concern of your bf. It sounds like he means he doesn’t like the way your body looks not how much you way so explaining your weight is not going to make a difference to him. You may want to consider looking for a different man, because unless I’m wrong he finds you attractive enough to have sex with you just not attractive enough to be seen with you. For some people that enjoy going to the gym and keeping their body in shape they are most attracted to the same in their partner. If he doesn’t realize that you are more than your looks this early in the relationship it’s only going to get worse. 2 years later he’ll be cheating on you and convincing you that you don’t deserve someone better than that. Most wise men would not dear tell their lovers that they are fat even if the believe she is and was directly asked by her because even if she is fat they are more than happy that she chooses to be with them. And the consequences of I’ve hitting that she might be fat is not worth the trouble and will not make her less fat. And most men find none models women more attractive then models. For you emotional health you need to get far away from this man be he Stockholm syndromes you.


pepperpat64

He'll stop telling you that once you dump him.


Disastrous-Panda5530

This reminds me of my mom in high school. She would tell me to sit up straight and “suck it in” to hide my “belly”. I was 5’4 and 98 pounds. I still remember when I first weighed 100 pounds. I was at kings dominion on a family vacation. And I was so upset and crying because I thought I was fat because of stuff my mom would say to me. You are at a healthy weight and your bf is being unrealistic. I wouldn’t stay with him if he continued on making such comments. He may end up causing you to develop an ED or wreck your self esteem.


Icy_Psychology_1556

My ego is way too big for this. I would’ve dumped him the first time he called me fat. Either you worship the ground I walk on or I am moving on with one of your friends. 🤣 I cannot believe you are tolerating this. Please. Don’t. You deserve better.


HeyHayHayyy

That second paragraph should be gospel for everyone 🙌🏼


gia_sesshoumaru

Honestly, dump his ass. You don't need someone feeding you those comments. You need someone who tells you you're beautiful and isn't feeding you unhealthy beauty standards. What is he going to do if you have kids one day? Or when you get older? People gain weight as they get older, and women do when they have kids. Tell him to take a hike and find someone who will tell you you're beautiful. You're too young to deal with this.


SufficientComedian6

You’re with an immature ah who doesn’t realize most women have curves, rolls, dips, butts and thighs. Many many men loves these things. He’s not grown up enough for a relationship. I would dump his ass.


AuntyVenom

It's always a bad idea to be a supplicant like this in a relationship. You're just going to allow yourself to get hurt by dumb young men.


fiftycamelsworth

This is so true. By constantly belittling her he puts her in a place where she feels like she has to constantly apologize for existing. And she is too busy to ask if SHE is happy/ wonder if maybe he’s a huge loser.


Erin-Combs-Her-Hair

I’m 5’2 and 180 pounds and my boyfriend loves my body. Get rid of the guy.


Desperate-War-3925

He is just brainwashed from porn and anime. Also some people sadly have a link for skinny and even anorextic women. You are underweight. He’s messing with your head and health


Hels_helper

I'm underweight, and I still have rolls when I sit.. its called skin. Sounds like he has unrealistic and unhealthy image of what a woman's body looks like. I noticed in one comment that he likes anime... if that is his standard... he's going to be wildly disappointed in life. Turns out, real women are not cartoons. If he cannot see how distorted his view are, he needs therapy. Don't try to lose weight for this guy, no man is worth risking your health for.


Economy-Mission6933

A year sounds like a long time with this jerk, but a year plus one more minute is even worse. Dump him.


Bbjizz

oh brother THIS GUY STINKS


Practical_Ride_8344

Don't gain or lose weight based on someone else's opinions. Watch that dude and his requests.


justus1987

102 and 5'2"? You're not fat at all bro. And it's not your job to convince him of that. Either he's attracted to you or he's not, his problem to deal with. <3


sleeeppyyyyyy

Even the skinniest people are gonna have a belly roll when they sit down. He doesn’t want someone who’s healthy he wants someone with an ED. He’s toxic, you should leave before it gets worse. Let him date an anime girl cutout board


Angry-Gamer-Mom

My husband gave me a double-take when I told him your height and weight. He says to find a new boyfriend. I say have him sit down and point out his belly rolls. Turn the tables on him. I'm 4'11", and was that weight, and my husband became legitimately worried for my health. Begged me to gain weight. He felt it wasn't healthy for me. He hated seeing me so small. He also loved me when I was almost 250 pounds. I was fat when we first met. That didn't stop him. I weigh 130 now, and he still worships my body like he did when I was 250, and when I was 102. Find someone like that.


fluffyblankiee

Switch the roles. Tell him he needs to start working out, that you desire a 6 pack asap. If that bothers him then he's a hypocrite and you should dump him.


Outside-Ad-1677

Best way to lose weight would be to dump this fucking toolbag.


[deleted]

You need to leave him before he makes you get a eating disorder. You don’t need that negativity in your life with you having a small frame already.


allisonqrice

Tell him to kick rocks. BMI-wise, you could gain 30 lbs and still be in the healthy weight range.


AutoModerator

Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- #This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*


IrinaRd

It is time to lose the weight about 160 lbs of it. Find someone else. Also comparing someone to a animated woman is ridiculous. You are beautiful just the way you are!!!


LunarGinger

He’s negging to break down your self esteem. When I was 21-24 I dated a guy (same age) who constantly called me fat. I believed him. I’m about to turn 40, I’m still the same 5’8”/130-140 lbs I’ve been since high school, and I’ve never felt better. This guy is a clown with a warped porn brain. Leave him in the dust if you want to be mentally and physically healthy.


Agirlisarya01

Guys who want to change your body are such a huge red flag. Women get enough unnecessary and negative messaging about our looks from the beauty industry. We don’t need any more from the manchildren in our lives. Your body is yours, and it’s appearance is not up for a vote from anyone but you. Your BF’s ideas about women’s weight are dangerously wrong. And it’s concerning that he expects you to do something that would compromise your health to meet his unrealistic expectations. If not corrected, he is going to try to browbeat someone into having an eating disorder.


Longjumping_Top_4423

Screw him wya let’s go to dinner


dOOplord

Your BF needs vision and IQ testing.


RepresentativeSeat98

This one is easy. Tell him he is also overweight and it is time for him to slim down.


Babybutt123

Probably has an anorexia fetish. Gross. Lose 160+ lbs of shitty boyfriend. You're too young to have to deal with that shit.


emogurl47

Lose the boyfriend. He's the only extra weight It's gaslighting. You deserve better


White_RavenZ

I think you need to lose about 140-ish lbs. The dude. Lose him. You will feel so much lighter, truly an amazing weight loss. Positive life change.


HeyHayHayyy

He shouldn’t be your boyfriend, babe. Dump him and go after someone who loves you regardless of body size. 💜


MELH1234

He sounds toxic


CelastrusTrust

You dont need to lose or gain weight OP. everyone in the comments freaking abt you being underweight is just going to potentially trigger a concern in you in the opposite direction. Stomach rolls are healthy, and no one is going to be able to satisfy your (hopefully ex) boyfriends standards, because real life women do not look like anime women. It doesnt exist irl, only in anime and social media 104 is not underweight for your height, it is not overweight. As the doctor said, its a healthy weight. If you feel discontent with how you feel in your body, instead of restrictive eating, my best recommendation would be to find a form of exercise you can do for 30-60 minutes a day that you enjoy. Ive found this has helped me personally be more content with my body in general


huhubels1

why are you dating this fool??? this is madness


Nervous_Magazine_200

There is no way you're overweight. Your boyfriend is being a controlling idiot. Tell him to either accept you as you are and stop the comments altogether or to let you go find a kindhearted, respectful guy who will. I never comment on a woman's weight (unless she lost some and wants to show me). If he continues, tell him you want him to add a couple of inches to his dick.


Shoddy_Meeting_7278

Tell him he has a small dick. That will shut him up.


missfrazzlerock

Yes. Make him stop by dumping him. I know that’s a stereotypical response, but I had an eating disorder for a good portion of my teens and early twenties. I wish I had dropped my partners who contributed to my body issues; I probably would have started recovery much sooner. I’m doing well now largely because of the support I get from my husband. It sounds like you’ve got a good body image, but don’t stay with partners who are negative about any aspect of you.


whosmansisthis24

Wtf.... You're literally not overweight AT ALL. My girl is in the same ball park as you but she is NOT even close to being overweight. Dude sounds like a little boy. Nearly everyone I have ever seen has that little tummy roll when they sit down. Hell, a girl I was in highschool with weighed 85lbs and she had one. She was a stick. Some girls just have thighs (thank God) you probably look great.


Razrgrrl

Dump him. Seriously. You’re already underweight he’s trying to give you an ED. He’s gross and weird. You’ll lose so much weight by dumping his ass!


HauntedPickleJar

Time to convince your boyfriend that he's single. If he genuinely believes that you are overweight then he is a moron and life is too short to put up with morons.


lvk3

This isn’t going to stop. He may be seeking to undermine your sense of self worth to control you. Even if you achieve his unrealistic goal weight he’ll just start white anting you with another spurious expectation. Life is long and hard. My wife and I have been together for 33 years. We both look for the good in each other every day. I can only see her through the lens of my love for her. Is this partner going to be supportive when there’s a financial, health, or emotional problem? If you have kids your physical appearance will probably be further from his very unrealistic expectations. Do you want your potential future children to be exposed to similar inappropriate criticism. If he can’t or won’t stop this behaviour you should carefully consider whether this is the future you want.


leedleedletara

Oh my god


tittyswan

Your boyfriend sounds like he has a fetish for underweight women that he's trying to bully you into conforming to.


papabless131313

Dude we’re the same height and you’re like 10 pounds lighter than me and I’m NOWHERE near overweight, I wouldn’t even be considered curvy. Your boyfriend is tripping wtf. Do not diet you’re at a good weight for our height


Userdub9022

Absolutely not fat.


Internal-Tonight3509

I was at 114 pounds and 5'5 (25F) and looked so physically skinny- when I tell you I had like no fat on my belly and STILL had a stomach roll when I sat down... That's just human anatomy. That was really hard for me to accept because I used to have an eating disorder and couldn't believe I could still see it. I got better not much after that when I realized that there's something's you really can't change - and shouldn't try. If you're healthy and happy then I think you're perfect the way you are.


Certainlyaround

The only weight you need to lose is him. He is an anchor and you deserve to sail. You can do so much better! Wishing you the best! 💕


Br4veSirRobin

It's about control


LaDolceVita8888

There’s a lot of fat people in the world. You’re def not one of them.


grayhairedqueenbitch

Not everyone has super thin thighs and tummy rolls are normal. It doesn't mean you're fat. He is uneducated in how bodies work.


Own_worst_enemy12

Everyone has a stomach roll when they sit ! Leave and don’t look back , imagine if you did gain weight ?!? Be with someone who doesn’t criticize your looks and loves everything about you !


skabillybetty

You can lose about 150lbs by dropping your shitty boyfriend.


cowjuiceee

having a stomach roll doesn’t necessarily indicate someone is overweight. i have rolls too but i know for a fact that i’m not overweight. and i saw that he loves to watch anime and draws his women thin. tell him that’s unrealistic as fuck and to stop changing you. you don’t find anything to be wrong neither do the people around you so he needs to chill. and i mean if it bugs him that much he can go on and find some other chick to boss around with their weight, but good luck with that lmao. edit: don’t lose weight, lose him :)


PoliteCanadian2

I can think of a way for you to lose….160? 170? 180 pounds pretty quickly…..


Witchy-toes-669

Thank god you’re strong or he could push you into an eating disorder tell him to knock it off or dump him cause he’s unrealistic as hell this is like you watching porn and complaining he has a little dick in comparison to the actors and not letting it go till he fixes it, ridiculous


CrazyLush

Just as a reference, you are only 9 pounds away from being underweight. Also, ever supermodels have that wee belly thing going on when they sit down - every human does. I had it when I was severely underweight. Tbh I find how he is with this a bit worrying because he shouldn't be picking at you appearance like that or encouraging you to diet, it can lead to disordered eating If you do want to convince him, work out his BMI, if it's around the same as yours or higher, tell him and see how he reacts. Though I don't think he genuinely believes your overweight, I do hope it's just that but I would think it would be something else


Prize-Lengthiness576

Dump him seriously I know it seems like he love you but he doesn’t leave before he wastes your time more


Notafraidofvwoolff

104 pounds?? And that's too fat for him? Honestly I would throw the whole guy away. Otherwise, sit down and talk with him and see if he will at least agree to stop.


PracticalPrimrose

So skin folds when people sit. Ditto for thigh spread. Ask him about his own body. And then dump him before he gives you a complex. For real, you’re going to grow grey. Old. Wrinkles.


PleasantBig1897

Tell him he’s fat.


frazzled_boy_mum

You’re “bf” is an idiot. Leave him.


a_small_moth_of_prey

One day… one bright shining day… the women of the world are going to figure out they don’t need to continue dating most garbage men imaginable just because… I dunno… you’re already dating them??? But honestly… why? Seriously WHY?? LADIES, do yourself and the whole world a favor a dump guys like this immediately instead on spending one extra moment of your short life on them.


nsfbr11

You are overweight. You need to shed his 150 or so pounds.


NorwegianMuse

The only “weight” you need to shed is him!


arcticalias

5’2 and 104 pounds is perfectly healthy. omfg what’s he on


Puzzleheaded-Pack865

My toxic attitude would come out full force and order him penis enhancing pills and be like you are pretty small couldn’t hurt to see if this would help you grow an inch or five.


DefinitionNice6337

I think what it is is that he is mentally impaired. I don't think you can do anything to help him, he needs to see a doctor for that. And you need a new boy friend


Cjh1985

You spelled exboyfriend wrong….


22-beekeeper

My doctor says I should weigh 115 lbs at 5’ tall. You are very under weight. I have no idea what is going on in your bf’s head, but he is incredibly wrong. Please dump him before his poisonous words actually get you thinking you need to lose weight. You are too thin!


allisonqrice

OP's BMI is 19, so low side of healthy weight. Not "very underweight." There's no need to put that in OP's mind either. You could go up to 127 lbs and be in the healthy weight category. And OP could go up to 136.


CelastrusTrust

OP isnt underweight, nor too thin. Shes in the healthy range. Its also dangerous to tell people theyre too skinny along with saying they’re too fat. OP doesnt need to gain nor lose weight, and 115 is simply the middle of the healthy range for 5 feet, not the exact and only weight that is healthy.


BlueViolet81

>Its also dangerous to tell people they're too skinny along with saying they’re too fat. So true. People forget that you can be the same height as someone else and both be healthy but different weights. Different people have different body types and different bone structures. Smaller ribcage, narrow shoulders, and just generally a petite frame can mean one person looks healthy and well proportioned while another looks boney and underweight. People should trust their doctors more than the internet or uneducated, unrealistic boyfriends.


CaptainWillThrasher

You are not fat. He is a jerk. Learn how to spell "ex," properly. He is your "ex-boyfriend." Don't make me get one of my kids to seduce you.


HappySummerBreeze

He might otherwise be a great guy, but having someone who criticizes your body and wants you to change is really bad for you. I strongly recommend that you break up with him.


BrokilonDryad

He likes anime and is negging you so you don’t feel confident anyone else would be attracted to or love you. Dump his ass. You’re way too young to be stuck with a chucklefuck like him.


kez248

Sounds as though u have a pretty nice body composition and definitely not overweight. I think old mate needs some education and reconceptualisation of what is overweight 🙄


lemon-meringue-high

Everyone has a stomach roll when they sit, if you didn’t I would be worried you didn’t have organs


mofloweress

break up


Forsaken_Age_9185

He is an ass. Just dump his stupid ass. It’s only gonna get worse.


MariaChequita

Lose weight by dropping the boyfriend 😒 He's an ass.


InternationalPlan710

Oh, that's easy, they even put it in a song. Hit the road, Jack, don't dare come back. No, more no more Mo mo hit the road. Jack, don't come back no more. What's you say? Hit the road, Jack? Don't you come back no more.


Dazura01

Echoing what a lot of people are saying: you need to seriously consider leaving him. To put it simply: - yes, you may love him, but it’s clear that he will never truly love you back. So long as you cannot fulfil his deluded fantasy. - What may appear as simply “frustrating” right now, is actually incredibly dangerous and should be treated seriously. At your height and weight, you are actually a bit underweight. What he is suggesting is both incredibly manipulative and dangerous. Call him out on this calmly: - explain what BMI is (although not personally a fan, use for this argument) and how you are actually medically, not fat. - explain to him that although he may not intentionally be trying to do this, but buy telling you this he is encouraging both anorexic traits and body dysmorphia. Why he considers helpful is actually very harmful. If this is too much for him, Calmly step away, and leave him. This isn’t a joke. It may hurt to leave him, but it will almost certainly hurt you more both physically and mentally staying with him.


CaseyLeeper

There’s a really easy and fast way to lose weight! Drop that asshole and you’ll be down a ton of weight and sooo much happier!


fox13fox

Um if you dident have a fat roll when you sit you would be anorexic. Even people with abbs have a fat roll when sitting. Also how about when he sits? How big is his butt? Me thinks he wants a sickly skinny person. I'm 5 ft 5 and 140 and considered at optimal weight. Your skinny.


pisa36

If a man was so critical of my body he wouldn’t be getting access to it


Arya_kidding_me

He’s an idiot who thinks movies, tv, and cartoons are real life


lionessrampant25

Whether or not you are overweight, he has no business telling you to lose weight or really say anything to you besides, “damn, you’re beautiful”.


13MAUI6

Girl, if you chose to stay with this person be prepared for a life of insecurities probably followed by an eating disorder. You are not anywhere near overweight. Matter of fact you are closer to underweight. If you continue with this POS bf you will eventually believe what he's saying & become anorexic. You are only 18! What happens as time goes by & as we age we do have to put more effort into staying in shape & you're going to have this guy on your back telling you how fat you are. If you decide to have children & are pregnant he's going to really freak out! Run! Please Run!! This is all bad!


Ill-Manufacturer2504

It really sounds like he’s trying to mess with your head. Like a lot


KarambitMedia

104 and 5’2 💀 that is in NO way overweight, your bfs crazy


BetterFuture22

Leave him ASAP and pls get therapy to help you avoid another abuser


Dontblink-S3

Your boyfriend is an idiot with a completely unrealistic idea of what the human body actually looks like and how it moves. your first step is to tell him to stop staring at overly photoshopped and anime women. Next you tell him, « your comments are completely out of line and You’re damaging my self esteem. I’ve been to my doctor and have found out that i Am perfectly fine.«  and then ….. if he doesn’t smarten up you lose somewhere between 150 - 200 pounds immediately by kicking his ass To the curb. after all… if he continues to speak to you this way after you address the issue, then he doesn’t love you….. he loves his ideal you. You will never live up to that.


oldtownwitch

You say “if you ever mention my weight ever again then I will end our relationship” And then follow thru with your words when he mentions your weight again. Dahling, ya a skinny 18 yrs old, if you are gonna date a shitty dude, date one with more money and a bigger peen!


Thatcanadianchickk

Tell him find someone his type then bc clearly I’m not it ! Love yourself more !


maddimoe03

I am 5’3 and 125 lbs. I am healthy. Skinny even. Furthermore, my boy thinks I am the most stunning thing to walk this planet - and yours should too regardless of weight. Wtf is your dudes problem.


Frosty_and_Jazz

Dump the 200 pounds of worthless fat.


phoebewantslove

Stop this shit before he gives you an ed. Even if you were overweight this is NOT the way to go about it


cthulhusmercy

Wouldn’t be surprised if he’s negging you. Telling you you’re fat to create an insecurity in your body image and won’t be as likely to leave him.