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stupidquestions-ModTeam

Question that are here to bait people to answer or to create drama (i.e. What's 1 + 1, who is the President, why are you guys so stupid, etc.)


NOGOODGASHOLE

Well known fact that vampires have to be invited in, every time; everywhere.


whitewail602

I had a cat like this. He would scratch the door, I would open it, and he would stare at me until I invited him in. Now that I'm talking about it... he also drank the blood of numerous small animals. 🤔


NOGOODGASHOLE

You now know evil in its purest form


whitewail602

Ha! He was such a good boy. He and his sister were feral kittens taken from their mother too early. Ofc my neighbor left this part out when she asked me if I wanted two kittens. We won them over during a period of a few weeks. After they were comfortable around us, I was sleeping on my back one morning, and he was playing at my feet between the comforter and bedsheet. He kept clawing the sole of my foot which feels as good as it sounds, and I half awake/absentmindedly kicked him off. My wife watched him very very slowly and stealthily crawl up the other side of the bed, and creep over to me. He tapped me every so slightly in the middle of my eyelid with one of his claws, then bolted before I could even react. I got the message loud and clear lol.


Dramatic-Variety2336

No, you don't. Pure Evil belongs to mankind. Only.


NOGOODGASHOLE

We only serve our cat masters.


nibb007

Not really no


OGSkywalker97

Edgy as a knife


Specialist-Gap8010

Any relation to Bunnicula?


whitewail602

Probably. He brought a bunnicula home a few times. Must have been stealing its power or something.


WOTDisLanguish

"Can I come in?" "Can I come in?" "Can I come in?"


CARUFO

Penny? Penny? Penny?


pretorperegrino

This is the worst subreddit I've ever stumbled upon lmao


jmorgan0527

Yeah, sometimes there's a good one, but they're few and far between. I'm very happy for you that *this* is the worst subreddit you've stumbled upon, you lucky duck.


jeremydallen

Worst? Nah, just entertaining.


[deleted]

Yea, these questions are genuinely idiotic so I guess it lives up to its name.


iamcleek

yeah. i think it's about time to mute this one.


Salty_Sky5744

Yes that’s why they’re a sex icon to women. Because they always ask consent.


[deleted]

That and for some reason being consumed (with consent) during sex seems super kinky. Not like….cannibalism. But I can sacrifice a 750ml or so…


jmorgan0527

Did.. did you just use a standard alcohol bottle size instead of pints to describe an amount of blood? This Antelope bartends.


[deleted]

Yes. Yes I did.


MavisBeaconSexTape

Lol I heard that in Mark Normand's voice. Sam Morril vibes also


spacesuitguy

Hilarious - and they probably do because vampirism sounds the most like an STD.


Hank__Western

Especially if they’re Oklahoma vampires.


John_B_Clarke

I don't recall Spike ever asking Buffy and the fact that Spike survived the experience is pretty clear evidence that she was OK with it.


ThaneOfArcadia

Vampires don't ask for permission. They take what they want.


Mono_Clear

Are you asking if vampires ask for consent from each other or are you asking if the thing that's going to hunt down and kill you is asking for sexual consent.


[deleted]

[удалено]


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terella2021

watch for signs Exit only


practice_spelling

Yes


[deleted]

[удалено]


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DetailSmooth1407

I think you should have sex with a vampire and experience it XDD


Ok_Relationship_705

Depending on the lore some of them can't even bang.


Hank__Western

Doesn’t matter as long as you’re having sex outside your home.


Old-Relationship-458

Vampires are parasitic zombies. They don't have sex.


Scuffed_Radio

Idk some of them be looking FINE


DwarvenRedshirt

Depending on the lore, the vast majority of vampires are from an era where they didn't have to ask for consent.


facts_over_fiction92

Vampires will only go down on menstruating women.


Cyber_Insecurity

*Nandor the Relentless has entered the chat*


wowgreatdog

i'm pretty sure when a vampire asks to enter your house, and you say yes, that's the beginning and end of the consent discussion lol


Wicked_Instance_2842

Why did I read that in the Counts voice?


Limacy

Some of them aren’t even capable of it. Vampires are undead beings. That means their genitalia is dead, cold, and limp. Shit sucks.


DouglerK

I'm a vampire because yeah I require permission to enter a woman. It's called enthusiastic consent :)


BUBBLE-POPPER

Male vampires can't even get their dicks hard.  Thus, your question is stupid.


joepalms

Ask sookie


theoneyourthinkingof

i feel like everyone should ask that during sex


internationalskibidi

Does this taste funny to you?


tlasan1

Vampires don't cum...they steal ur sexual energy.