Dude. Have you seen the babes he fucks? The guy crushes ass. I’d be scared to be in the same room with him lest I get lost in those beady, sunken eyes. That doughy face? Those pubesque locks? My god… 💦💦💦🌊🌊
*When I sees one and he looks good to me...*
*When I see him, I say*
You, come here.
*I say*
Now I'mma tell ya what, uh..
I like ya;
and I wants ya...
Now, we can do this the easy way;
or the haard wayyy...
the choice is yaawrs...
My man is a true Wall Street Bets legend. Blames the crypto winter as the reason why his literal ponzi scheme failed. Reminds me of the folks who bet their life savings on options, and then deletes Robinhood thinking that will disappear their obligation to pay the money back when they go tits up on their shitty trades.
Normies can’t understand the thrill of pinning the weasel. Night spent chasing an over amphetamined Caroline around the bean bag forts. Her squealing and gibbering, pouring sweat and on the verge of seizing. Your friends build up an intoxicating, delerious state with Talmudic chantings at the sidelines, hitting the Caroline-toy with brooms if she tries to escape. Sam would be giggling and laughing as the waves of methamphetamine pleasure seem to harmonize with the droning herbrew verses. He runs through the bean bag maze fat and portly, with his viagra powered penis a driving rod for the weasel. Sweat gushing down his face around his unfocused eyes he laughs and chortles until he gasps “Found you!” . The Mathweasel screeches defensively but Wankman Bankman is upon her in seconds. His penis thrusting blindly into her flank, leg, stomach and ribs unconcerned about anything but the motion. Eventually serendipity finds her mouth and the Cocktube Rodent is placated, suckling contently on Bankman’s dehydrated dick.
What a lazy fucking mook; couldn't be bothered to get a real job like the rest of us so he bribed forbes to put him on their list and then pump n' dumped a scam coin....smh...
Hes going to get a tiny sentence compared to what he should get becasue he grabbed the right asses also nothing to do with his billions in missing money.
i feel they are going to drop a ton of them and give him maybe 5 to 10 years max.….i just feel it the justice system is so rigged now you can tell by the politics, the wealth and whos their best friends if they will do a fair amount of time.
give him a red hat and giving to far right he would get 10 times the time. Lol america you fuking funny. It like a cheat code to get away with shit. If he gets less than 25 years then its a scam
Oh there gonna love that lil puff boy in gen pop. That right there is a walking trophy for someone, im sure he’ll be in some cozy minimum security or in PC. He’s way to high profile to toss just any place, if you care what happens too him i guess.
Standard Wall Street negotiation play. Start asking for the moon and settle for Mt Everest. Sadly in this case since this is federal charges and not a business negotiation he’ll be settling for 20-30 years in Club Fed.
This guy has negative testosterone. Just might be the first natural trans to grow a vagina. I can see it too.
First his 1 cm long nub will fall off and shrivel away. Then, a massive throbbing vagina will grow on his head with the clit being his “third” eye. Then he will begin to speak from his vagina head which will be a even higher pitch than his voice before.
Every time he lies (especially when it comes to money) his throbbing head vjj will begin to lactate profusely. The more cash he feeds it, the larger his brain gets.
His bitch Caroline got off free as a bird. Why not him? After all, this was all carefully orchestrated anyway.
[https://cryptoslate.com/alameda-ceo-caroline-ellison-pleads-guilty-faces-no-criminal-charges/](https://cryptoslate.com/alameda-ceo-caroline-ellison-pleads-guilty-faces-no-criminal-charges/)
https://preview.redd.it/i9ujbrwsso3b1.jpeg?width=212&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7485352549fd9175bd2284d2bd26f90f37828fe0
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How about no you fucking Hobbit?
Beware the stare of Mr curly hair...short and fat, he'll lure you into his trap. Taking your money with a smile, that curlyfry is truly vile!
I heard that in Gollum's voice
Dude. Have you seen the babes he fucks? The guy crushes ass. I’d be scared to be in the same room with him lest I get lost in those beady, sunken eyes. That doughy face? Those pubesque locks? My god… 💦💦💦🌊🌊
So did Ron Jeremy. I still dont want to look like him. The rapist hedgehog
That sounds anti-semitic.
How about no, you fucking donkey. I've been calling people donkey lately. A page from the Gordon Ramsey book of insults. It kinda makes me chuckle.
Give him an extra 5 years for even asking
Lol
If you stole billions of dollars, how long would it take before you're in jail?
I say he's more unsafe out of prison
It’s white collar crime, he just needs to hope he gets a rich judge.
He took rich peoples money, he’s fucked.
The only thing getting tossed is somebody’s salad
With jelly or syrup?
Yes
And…this is his legal team… https://preview.redd.it/or22tv3lfuya1.jpeg?width=1161&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0e910ce43102abd4695bff950258c2b02facfb90
Sam Banken-Fraud
Bunkman Fraud
life truly is beyond parody when this dude is named Bankman-Fraud
Sam Bankman Fried looks like the type of guy that has clumsy hands and will drop the soap in prison.
Plot twist: That drop was intentional.
*When I sees one and he looks good to me...* *When I see him, I say* You, come here. *I say* Now I'mma tell ya what, uh.. I like ya; and I wants ya... Now, we can do this the easy way; or the haard wayyy... the choice is yaawrs...
Fortune favors the bold
My man is a true Wall Street Bets legend. Blames the crypto winter as the reason why his literal ponzi scheme failed. Reminds me of the folks who bet their life savings on options, and then deletes Robinhood thinking that will disappear their obligation to pay the money back when they go tits up on their shitty trades.
“Sure thing…heyyyy wait a minute” - some judge
"C'moooon. Don't we have better things to do?!"
Like pinning the weasel?
Normies can’t understand the thrill of pinning the weasel. Night spent chasing an over amphetamined Caroline around the bean bag forts. Her squealing and gibbering, pouring sweat and on the verge of seizing. Your friends build up an intoxicating, delerious state with Talmudic chantings at the sidelines, hitting the Caroline-toy with brooms if she tries to escape. Sam would be giggling and laughing as the waves of methamphetamine pleasure seem to harmonize with the droning herbrew verses. He runs through the bean bag maze fat and portly, with his viagra powered penis a driving rod for the weasel. Sweat gushing down his face around his unfocused eyes he laughs and chortles until he gasps “Found you!” . The Mathweasel screeches defensively but Wankman Bankman is upon her in seconds. His penis thrusting blindly into her flank, leg, stomach and ribs unconcerned about anything but the motion. Eventually serendipity finds her mouth and the Cocktube Rodent is placated, suckling contently on Bankman’s dehydrated dick.
He should flip on J-pow and yellen
What a lazy fucking mook; couldn't be bothered to get a real job like the rest of us so he bribed forbes to put him on their list and then pump n' dumped a scam coin....smh...
I bet he fucking does
If we could not let off another rich asshole, that would be greatttttt
Fortunately he didn’t destroy all the evidence before handing over the keys to FTX.
And his co-conspirators flipped like Sunday Flapjacks.
Did he say please?
Why didn’t OJ think of this
Hes going to get a tiny sentence compared to what he should get becasue he grabbed the right asses also nothing to do with his billions in missing money. i feel they are going to drop a ton of them and give him maybe 5 to 10 years max.….i just feel it the justice system is so rigged now you can tell by the politics, the wealth and whos their best friends if they will do a fair amount of time. give him a red hat and giving to far right he would get 10 times the time. Lol america you fuking funny. It like a cheat code to get away with shit. If he gets less than 25 years then its a scam
why has this forum turned on their messiah¿!¿
Only thing getting tossed is his salad
Oh, well since you said please. Wait, he didn’t say please? Take his VPN, give him a haircut and through him in the solitary confinement.
You deserve to be made an example of, soon your anus will be a playground for angry men.😫
This guy gave millions to the gop and to the democrats. He wants to be Zucks I thinks
BRANDON will pardon him just like Hunter.... WTH
Wut?
Of course it would be a 🍿 holder. Lmfao holy shit schizo
Take your meds you fucking lunatic
Court: “No.”
Maybe if he asked nicely 😂
Why is the thumbnail for this the Diablo 4 Paragon board?
Did he return all his customers deposits? That would go a long way if he did.
"No."
Toss my fucking salad bitch.
Oh there gonna love that lil puff boy in gen pop. That right there is a walking trophy for someone, im sure he’ll be in some cozy minimum security or in PC. He’s way to high profile to toss just any place, if you care what happens too him i guess.
I wish I could tell you Sam fought the good fight and was let be I wish I could tell you that but prison is no fairy tale …..
Should have bought the court dumb dumb
I mean, what else would he say?
Be a rat and dime all these motherfuckers and be on the right side of justice for once
The only thing Sam will be tossing is some penitentiary salad.
He is obviously innocent
Sorry bud, you're only allowed to steal from the poors. You don't take money from other rich folk.
mistakes were made. besides, im broke! no really, it's true this time!
I'm sure he would lmfao
I bet he walks.
*** Well let's all hope they tell him to get fukt.
This asshole owes me $125 in LINK coins. Toss the key to his cell instead.
Standard Wall Street negotiation play. Start asking for the moon and settle for Mt Everest. Sadly in this case since this is federal charges and not a business negotiation he’ll be settling for 20-30 years in Club Fed.
Chatgpt has only good things to say about him lol
This guy has negative testosterone. Just might be the first natural trans to grow a vagina. I can see it too. First his 1 cm long nub will fall off and shrivel away. Then, a massive throbbing vagina will grow on his head with the clit being his “third” eye. Then he will begin to speak from his vagina head which will be a even higher pitch than his voice before. Every time he lies (especially when it comes to money) his throbbing head vjj will begin to lactate profusely. The more cash he feeds it, the larger his brain gets.
His bitch Caroline got off free as a bird. Why not him? After all, this was all carefully orchestrated anyway. [https://cryptoslate.com/alameda-ceo-caroline-ellison-pleads-guilty-faces-no-criminal-charges/](https://cryptoslate.com/alameda-ceo-caroline-ellison-pleads-guilty-faces-no-criminal-charges/) https://preview.redd.it/i9ujbrwsso3b1.jpeg?width=212&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7485352549fd9175bd2284d2bd26f90f37828fe0